


When Haru Met Makoto

by Einzel



Series: When Haru Met Makoto [2]
Category: Free!
Genre: Ao3 offered me the Better Than Canon tag and I am laughing, Gen, I am not sure I will ever top this in terms of sheer volume and dedication, I bet you all thought this story would never get custom tags, Makoto and Haru never met while Rei and Nagisa are childhood friends, Multi, Slow Build, Sousuke only has a minor part sorry Sousuke, Universe Alteration, also there are a lot of references enjoy, and Kisumi has such a short mention I didn't even have the heart to tag him, basically I fixed a lot of plotholes and turned this faux sports anime into a love story, better late than never right
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-25
Updated: 2016-10-14
Packaged: 2018-01-16 23:55:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 70
Words: 360,629
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1366411
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Einzel/pseuds/Einzel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Free! UA where Rei was part of the original relay team and Makoto becomes the new fourth member of the Iwatobi Swim Club. Follows the structure of the anime going by the subtitles produced by HorribleSubs, but bases back-story more closely on High Speed! and includes references to the FrFr! specials and drama CD content where appropriate.</p><p>Finally finished after two and a half years. Thank you, everyone who believed in me.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. EPISODE 1: Reunion at the Starting Block! - Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was the drawing I did to celebrate the start of this story on Tumblr, brought to you by the power of HTML! Enjoy the story, and if you like it, do check out its prequel, _Before Haru Met Makoto_ as well!

The water is alive. Once you dive in, it will immediately bare its fangs and attack.

But there’s nothing to fear. Don’t resist the water. Thrust your fingers into the surface and carve an opening. Then you slide your body through that opening. Moving your arms, your head, your chest...

_Sixth grader Nanase Haruka launched himself into the air and entered his natural element almost seamlessly, gliding through the water with a sense of carefree elegance that always left his younger peers gawking in awe._

_“His swimming always looks so beautiful,” sighed fifth-grader Ryuugazaki Rei, having never seen a more graceful form in his eleven-year-old life. Beside him, his classmate, Hazuki Nagisa nodded with a grin._

_“Yep, like a dolphin!” he said cheerfully, coaxing a soft chuckle out of Rei, who then turned his attention to the swimmer approaching his block. Rei pressed_ Stop _on his watch and told the girl below her time._

_A few more turns and Haruka left the pool, only for another swimmer to take his place, a boy Nagisa had never seen before. He launched forward energetically and dove in with a great splash. Nagisa turned to Rei in excitement._

_“Who’s that, Ryuugazaki-kun?” he asked, nudging his friend’s elbow until Rei’s gaze turned to him, then followed Nagisa’s pointed finger to the newcomer in the water._

_“I believe his name is Matsuoka,” replied Rei, who overheard the stranger’s introduction as he walked past to grab a kickboard from the equipment cart._

_“I wanna talk to him!” bounced Nagisa._

_“Suit yourself,” came Rei’s reply, who had agreed to time a few more swimmers and so could not budge from his place, not even for Nagisa’s sake. Well… not unless it was an emergency. He turned his eyes to his stopwatch again while Nagisa scampered off, to wait for the stranger by the block._

_Some time later, Nagisa and Matsuoka left that lane and lined up next to Haruka._

_“You’re going to race, Nanase-kun, and I’m gonna time you to see who’s faster!” Rei heard Nagisa say, so he turned his head towards them to watch them swim. Matsuoka snapped his goggles into place. As he and Haruka curled into position, Nagisa asked for and received a stopwatch from another swimmer to record their times._

_“Ready… Set… Go!”_

_Nagisa and Rei watched as they dived in, soon caught in a heated race, shooting towards the other side and back like human torpedoes. It was a close call, very close, but in the end, Haruka’s hand touched the wall first._

_“Who was it?!” cried Matsuoka from below. Nagisa pointed to Haru, who proceeded to clamber out of the pool, plucking the stopwatch out of Nagisa’s hand. Nagisa let him._

_“You were so cool, Nanase-kun!” he breathed in awe. “I wanna swim like you…!”_

_“Your swimming was beautiful, Nanase-senpai!” agreed Rei from a lane away._

_Haru merely hummed, the stopwatch still in his hands. Nagisa and Rei thought the other boy would follow, but he chose to linger by the lane rope, flashing a congenial smile at the others standing together. Haruka regarded him with a stern expression. Rei and Nagisa were obviously unfamiliar with him, but Haru had seen him before at several swim meets, and as of yesterday, they were in the same class at Iwatobi Elementary School, too. Even without the compulsory introductions on his first day, Haruka would have remembered the boy’s name, carved into his memory by sheer annoyance more than anything else._ Matsuoka… Matsuoka Rin.

_“Well, what was your time for the hundred meter?”_

_Haruka returned the stopwatch to Nagisa, then left the block for the lane Rei was timing. Nagisa peered down at the screen._

_“He reset it,” he said wide-eyed. Haru could hear Rin scoff but said nothing, letting his actions speak loud and clear instead, in a way Haru never could._

That’s right, I don’t care about swimming faster times, _he thought as he once again stepped upon the starting block of his choice and assumed his stance once more._ All I want is to feel the water. With my skin, my eyes, my soul... To never doubt what it makes me feel. To believe in myself.

Don’t resist the water. Welcome it.

We accept one another.

_Yeah... There was some funky stuff going through my head back then_ , mused Nanase Haruka four years later, sitting in the bathtub of an empty house with his hand reached out in absolute reverie. He tensed his fingers and made a languid grasp at nothing, as if to mock that pure, passionate younger self that had fallen through the cracks of time and was lost, perhaps, forever.

There was an old saying his late grandmother taught him. When you’re ten, they call you a prodigy. When you’re fifteen, they call you a genius. Once you hit twenty, you’re just an ordinary person.

_About three more years until I’m ordinary_ , thought Haru as he closed his eyes and tilted his head back until he slipped to the bottom of the tub, his breath bubbling away in pearls.

_Man... I can’t wait to be ordinary._

* * *

Haruka stayed in the water for a long, long time, wishing it would never turn cold enough to threaten him with an actual illness instead of a feigned one. A good hour or so had passed since the start of the opening ceremony at Iwatobi High School, but being averse to all boring formalities, he quickly decided to call in sick and successfully exempted himself from attending. It hardly mattered what class he would be in or who his homeroom teacher would be, anyway – Matsuoka Rin was long gone and Haru had no other friends his own age, having been a solitary creature for as long as he could remember. With no family or peers around to nag him, the bathtub upstairs held an allurement that no amount of grandiose speeches and tedious assemblies could ever hope to contend with.

He measured his time by the darkening shades of his fingernails and tended to draw the line at “obviously purple,” at which point the water had become unbearably cold to a body doomed to sitting still. Haru climbed out with little reluctance yet infinite regret, his swimsuit clinging like a second skin that he detested to pick and peel. On it stayed, dried roughly with a towel so Haru could leave for his bed, where he laid down in a crumpled heap. On his writing desk, his phone seemed to beep every few minutes with a new message – Haru counted seven until the constant buzzing of vibrate wore off. Someone must have been quite desperate to bother him. That’s what every instance of communication felt like on the damn thing. He agreed to have it for emergencies – that was his original condition, but messages could hardly be considered a cause for alarm. _If they had time to type in all that, they could have just called instead._ Haru sighed and pulled the blanket over his head, protesting even the unobtrusive dimness of a room where every blind was drawn, in a vast, empty house where every door was locked.

While the weather was unfavorable to swim in the ocean, Haruka passed his time doing homework and chores, sitting in the bathtub, or wasting away in sleep with little variance to distinguish one day from another, weeks from months, until his life formed into clear-cut patterns of freedom in the water and passive confinement at school and at home. Haru did sometimes prop his arms on the windowsill, letting his gaze wander along the white stone stairs to the Misagozaki shrine, but the urge to chase what his eyes could consume in one lazy glance never came. His sole object of desire remained the water, where loneliness transformed into blissful independence, and “Why don’t you try to make friends?” became “No one I know compares to _this_.” And from his soul, it was true – concepts like the ‘best friend’ or ‘soul mate’ his peers always talked of in loud and important voices had stayed an intangible myth to Haruka. He doubted that any one person could ever learn to navigate the maze of his mind when he said so little and kept to himself so much, and it seemed like an unreasonable demand to be understood without explanation, to be accepted without any desire to fix him, and to not be entirely forgotten or reproached whenever he went off to do as he would, which was to simply exist.

And so he existed under the covers for a few hours, neither asleep nor awake, and what eventually roused him was the doorbell, chiming ten times in perfect tempo. _Go away. I don’t care. Go away,_ he pleaded silently, hands wringing the sheets, but then the phone started ringing too, and Haruka was suddenly obliged to care, bound by his promise to his parents to answer every call and be accountable, or else give up “wasting away” in this small town and move in with them as he should have two years ago. He was not ready to leave the ocean, his one constant through seventeen years of solitude. He picked up the phone.

“Hello.”

“Haruka-senpai..! Thank goodness! It’s Rei, Ryuugazaki Rei? Let us in, Haruka-senpai!”

“…Oh.”

Haruka had no one but himself to blame. Had he spared one minute to look at his unread messages – twelve in total –, he would have realized that Rei, who attended all formal school events without fail, and was in general prone to officiousness, had been frantically trying to reach him the moment the opening ceremony had ended to gauge the severity of his pretend illness. Haru’s hand went limp, until the phone slipped back onto the desk with a small thud. He sighed as he slowly dragged himself to the ground floor, where he unlocked the door and pulled it open just enough to stick his head outside. It was there that the troubling discrepancy between “Rei” and “us” was finally resolved in realizing he had two guests instead of one. Having failed to contact him, Rei decided to seek Nagisa’s advice, and they soon agreed that a visit to dispel their apprehensions would probably do no harm.

“You’re alive!” Nagisa greeted him, grinning from ear to ear. “Why don’t you ever check your phone, Haru-chan?”

“We had been informed by the faculty counselor of Iwatobi High School that you were ill, Haruka-senpai,” explained Rei. “So we thought we would visit you and brought you this…” he continued as Nagisa lifted his bag, from which Rei produced a food container, holding it out for Haruka to take. “Chicken noodle soup.”

“The best remedy of all!” added Nagisa. Haruka stared blankly in response, wondering why no one ever remembered that he preferred mackerel to anything else. The idea annoyed him more than the fact that Rei obviously inquired after him at the assembly – or how he was able to inquire when Haru and the others had never attended school together in the first place.

“Well, aren’t you gonna let us in, Haru-chan? It’s cold out here, you know..!” whined Nagisa. Haruka’s frame was still wedged firmly between themselves and the warmth within, and when he moved to the side at last, he pulled the door open just barely enough for the others to squeeze through. Nagisa promptly slipped past him with the unconcerned ease of a teenager who felt at home wherever he went, and after a quick bow to his host, Rei followed him into the living room. Haru himself stood by the door for a moment longer, wondering where he had lost control of the situation, and worse, where it might be headed. The soup was so hot it burned his palm through the plastic. He dragged the door shut.

By the time Haru appeared in the living room, Nagisa and Rei had settled down on the bare floor by the table and were peering up at him as if waiting for or downright expecting something. Haruka’s stare was deadpan. Nagisa’s smile widened.

“Do you want tea?” muttered Haru, obviously reluctant to host them.

“Yes, please, Haru-chan!” chirruped Nagisa.

“If it’s not too inconvenient, Haruka-senpai...” said Rei in a low voice.

“…There are pillows in the bottom cabinet,” sighed Haruka, disappearing into the kitchen with the container. The familiar creak of cabinet doors sliding on their hinges and the slight shuffle that followed informed him that they had found his set of purple pillows, which hadn’t seen much use in months.

“You really should keep them where we can see them, Haru-chan. It’s almost like you don’t _like_ guests coming to your house,” he heard Nagisa say. _I don’t,_ thought Haru, but he pursed his lips and drowned his annoyance in the kettle. Three cups were soon procured from the back of the cupboard and slipped onto a tray, along with three bowls and three sets of chopsticks, if only to give the impression that was expected of him. Haruka had no desire to eat, but he figured that such things were better not said out loud. Nagging would inevitably follow and nagging was tiresome.

“Here,” he said, setting everything down on the table in easy reach along with the container, which had since been opened and a ladle dipped into that luscious swamp of chicken breast and udon. He then pulled out a pillow for himself and joined them, sinking to the floor with his arms folded over his knees. Nagisa immediately took a bowl, filling it to the brim with gleaming eyes. Rei shook his head, but said nothing, and took one of the cups.

“You look remarkably well, Haruka-senpai,” he began, flashing the other a tentative smile. Haru glared at him from behind the wall of his arms.

“I’m not sick. I just called in sick,” he said, his tone defensive and sharp. Rei balked.

“B-But Haruka-senpai, an opening assembly is a compulsory school event—”

“I don’t care.”

“Calling in sick though just so you wouldn’t have to go, _really,_ Haru-chan?” teased Nagisa, though the grin on his face was proof enough that he could relate, and did not wish to quarrel for long. Indeed, he was soon too busy stuffing his mouth to attempt anything of the sort.

“You shouldn’t neglect your responsibilities as a student, Haruka-senpai,” said Rei, and after shooting Nagisa a reprimanding glare (mostly for slurping his noodles too messily), he continued to say, “But fear not, Haruka-senpai, for the moment I discerned you were not present, I made special care to listen to the announcement for second-year students in your place! You shall be in Class One this year and you will have a new homeroom teacher as well. She has recently transferred to Iwatobi High School to teach classical literature… her name is Amakata Miho-sensei, I believe.”

“Fomfing lige dhat,” nodded Nagisa, earning another annoyed glance from Rei. He swallowed, almost straining his neck to get the better of a piece of chicken he was working on. “But never mind that now, there are more important things to discuss,” he carried on, fixing his eyes intently on Haruka. “Haru-chan, is there a chance we could swim together again? Imagine if we swam in a relay to represent Iwatobi, wouldn’t that be great?”

“What are you talking about,” replied Haru, his expression guarded. “You don’t even attend the same school.”

“That’s what you think, Haru-chan!” came the cheerful answer, accentuated by a stern cough from Rei.

“Had you attended the opening assembly, Haruka-senpai, you would have noticed that both Nagisa-kun and I have enrolled in Iwatobi High School.”

“Yep! It was such a bother to be apart from you for so long, and now we get to go to the same school! Well, what do you say, Haru-chan?”

Haru said nothing at first, his every joint frozen stiff with discomfort. They had only run into each other a few times since the relay, and whenever they did, Haruka seldom talked about himself. For all Nagisa knew, he could have won a dozen tournaments in the meantime… and perhaps he would have, had it not been for that one meeting with Rin three years ago.

“I quit swimming competitively,” he owned, his eyes boring into the floor. No passage of time could prepare him for their looks of disappointment, let alone the verbal avalanche that followed.

“ _Whaaat?!_ ” cried Nagisa, his shock so great he had to set his bowl down. “Why’d you quit?! I was all excited about getting to swim with you again in high school!”

“Me too, Haruka-senpai!” joined in Rei, almost pleading. “I spent most of this week reviewing all the latest theories about swimming! Nagisa-kun and I even considered asking you to come with us so we could buy new swimsuits together..!”

“We are not little kids anymore,” snapped Haru. “Things aren’t the way they used to be.”

“Haru-chan…” breathed Nagisa, his voice tender with selfish concern, and his eyes large with pleas for a _real_ explanation that Haru felt unable to provide. Having to argue always drained him to the core. If any part of his conduct had ever given him grief, it was the constant demands of others to justify it.

“Haruka-senpai..” began Rei, his voice cautious, “Is there any other reason for your objecting to the idea?”

_Stop prying_ , said the way Haru turned his head, his face dulled to a blank page as his resistance faded into silent passivity. Rei’s fingers curled into an idle fist, the urge to pursue the issue strong, yet slowly crumbling to pieces at that veil of resigned sadness over Haruka’s eyes that neither of them knew how to pierce. He sighed. Nagisa forced a weak smile.

“Come on, Haru-chan..!” he pleaded, lacing hope with easy-going playfulness. “You do like water, don’t you?”

“Sure,” replied Haru, no longer looking at anyone or anything in particular.

“Well then, let’s found a hot springs club instead! What do you say?”

“I am fairly certain that a hot springs club would not be endorsed by any school committee, Nagisa-kun,” replied Rei automatically. Nagisa chuckled despite himself.

“You really have no imagination, do you, Rei-chan?”

“ _Nagisa-kun..!_ ”

_After all this time, they are still the same,_ Haruka thought to himself, his heart stale with an emptiness their voices could not reach, a negative space that his friends could not fill. He listened to their affectionate bickering for a while longer, but the more it dragged on, the further Haru had withdrawn into his shell, until Rei became keenly conscious of their having overstayed their welcome. He gave Nagisa’s side a gentle nudge.

“Well, we’ll be leaving now, Haruka-senpai,” he said pointedly as he rose to his feet. Nagisa blinked, but soon followed suit, and Haru took that as his cue to fetch the lid of the container from the kitchen.

“No, no, it’s fine, Haru-chan..!” protested Nagisa, thrusting the shopping bag at Rei in a sloppy attempt to hide it. “Please eat it, it’s yours. Sorry I ate so much of it…”

“That’s fine,” replied Haru, his voice perfectly bland. He dropped the lid on the table, then led them to the door, grabbing his keys to unlock it again. Nagisa and Rei slipped out amid hushed goodbyes that Haru returned with a nod, holding the door in obvious wait for the very moment he could close it. Nagisa hesitated.

“You _are_ coming tomorrow, right, Haru-chan?” was his last valiant attempt. Haru paused. As little as he cared about first day attendance, the lie had been exposed, and there was no excuse not to go. He gave Nagisa a half-hearted nod that the other barely noticed, grabbing Haru’s hand to squeeze it in his. “Promise you’ll come! We could meet for lunch…!”

“That sounds like a wonderful idea,” said Rei, flashing a tentative smile at both of them. “We could meet on the roof. The view must be so beautiful and we would be seeing it for the first time… Would you accompany us, Haruka-senpai?”

Haru pursed his lips in defiance, to no avail. Between those childish faces brimming with hope, there was simply no refuge for him.

“Fine,” he sighed, closing his eyes in defeat. Nagisa’s laughter rang thoroughly relieved.

“It’s settled then! See you tomorrow, Haru-chan!” he cried as he practically skipped down the path in triumph with an exasperated Rei in tow, ignoring his cries of _Wait up, Nagisa-kun…! And no running on the stairs!_

Haru stood there for a while longer, as if the drift of those familiar voices had anchored him to the open door, but once even their echoes ebbed away, the sudden absence of life that filled his house, only to die in the blink of an eye stunned Haruka greater still. Silence fell upon him like a blow to the head and he slowly retreated inside, locking the door behind him for good.

The soup had grown lukewarm since, but its smell had pervaded the living room so entirely that Haru soon found himself slipping to the floor to gather the container in his arm, drawing clump after clump of cooled noodles from the golden liquid with his chopsticks. He stuffed them inside his mouth with a restless urgency, as though the void inside of him had become one resonant scream of hunger.

He ate the whole thing, down to the last strand of udon and the smallest shred of chicken breast, leaving nothing but some residue of broth on the bottom. He furrowed his brow and shoved the container away in shame. _It wasn’t even that good_ , he angrily told himself… so why did he eat it all?

By the time Haru crawled back into bed, his too-full stomach felt like molten lead, spreading slowly to his limbs until they grew heavy with entropy. It was the same oppressive emptiness of every night, yet for the first time in a long while, some tiny, deeply buried part of him stirred like a wounded animal, crying out for something Haruka could not even fathom, let alone identify.

He lay awake all night staring at the ceiling. What was he missing?

.

. .

Was it Rin. . .?

* * *

Nagisa might have made a show of being cheerful, but the further they got from the house, the more his steps lost their spring, until both he and Rei stopped at the bottom of the stone stairs, looking back with concern and disappointment. Having spent their week-long holiday together, and each indulging to some extent in the possibility of a miraculous transformation from one meeting to the next, they had secretly hoped to find Haruka more lively, or at the very least, not as desolate as he appeared in the door, pale and tired and lonesome as ever.

“Rei-chan… Can I come over tonight?” asked Nagisa, his voice low and strange. Rei’s face had hardened the more he stared at Haruka’s house in the distance, but once he turned his head to look at Nagisa, his features softened almost instantly.

“You may, Nagisa-kun…” he replied, then added with a hint of sternness, “but only if you pack and bring your schoolbag. I will not be held responsible for your arriving late to school on your first day!”

Nagisa let out a weak chuckle, eyes gleaming in the light.

“Wonderful, caring Rei-chan,” he whispered, and it was Rei’s turn to laugh and flush. He shook his head, then walked on with Nagisa towards the nearest train station, both of them uncharacteristically quiet on the way.

A few hours later, just after dinner, Nagisa donned his high school uniform for the first time since the opening ceremony, then gave himself a good look in the mirror, fancying himself the spitting image of a young adult who had things to do and places to be, the place being Rei’s apartment nearby, and the things to be decided on the spot like always. Nagisa packed his school bag extra carefully not to give Rei any cause for regret, quickly snuck some bread rolls from the kitchen for next day’s lunch, then hurried outside, so solemn and out of place in his late evening march that passersby could not help but pause and marvel at such a determined, serious young man. Nagisa’s face only brightened once Rei opened the door, already dressed in butterfly pajamas. Nagisa scurried inside, sprawling onto the bed with his schoolbag beside him.

“Thank you, Rei-chan,” he said with a grin. Rei shook his head softly.

They stayed up well past their usual time, engaged in no more than idle chitchat cautiously circling around its true object, which each was reluctant to address, yet hoped to resolve while they were still awake. The conversation was slowly but surely dying, each pause longer than the last, until Nagisa forced a yawn and dropped his head on Rei’s shoulder. He took a deep breath to strengthen his resolve. It was now or never.

“Rei-chan,” he began, voice cautious, “do you think Haru-chan will keep his promise?”

“A promise is a promise, Nagisa-kun,” replied Rei. “I’m sure he will come.”

“What do you think happened to him that he doesn’t swim competitively anymore?” Nagisa pressed on, unwilling to believe that Haru-chan had simply grown up while they themselves had hardly changed.

“I don’t know,” sighed Rei. “I suppose.. perhaps he lost interest after Rin-senpai left. I don’t believe he had been especially competitive before that time, and he seemed to take Rin-senpai’s leave very hard.”

Nagisa squinted, his heart thumping with faraway echoes of Rin-chan’s laugh as he waved goodbye to them, never to be seen again.

“I cried when he left,” he whispered. “We both did, do you remember? Haru-chan didn’t cry at all, but I bet he felt worse than we did. I think Rin-chan was his only friend in class...”

“He’s always been alone, it seems,” said Rei, his blood running cold. “I should have kept in touch with him better. The last time we met, I confirmed his address and even asked for his phone number, and yet I haven’t sent him a message or visited him until today…”

“Don’t blame yourself, Rei-chan,” pleaded Nagisa, giving Rei’s arm a squeeze. “Haru-chan doesn’t need you…”

“That’s not a very nice thing to say,” muttered Rei, his brow furrowed. Nagisa blinked.

“I didn’t mean it that way! I meant that what Haru-chan needs isn’t you or me. What Haru-chan really needs is someone steady in his life!”

“Someone steady…? You mean—”

“Haru-chan needs a soul mate!” cried Nagisa, smacking his fist against the palm of his hand. “He needs to make more friends, especially in class so he would see them everyday. Maybe if he found somebody nice, he would cheer up and swim in a relay again!”

“I think your cause and effect are rather disjointed, Nagisa-kun,” replied Rei, unable to resist logical fallacies, but then adding with more enthusiasm, “But you are absolutely right. Haruka-senpai needs to broaden his horizons and open up his heart to the beauty of close, intimate companionship. Perhaps… _perhaps…_ ”

“Perhaps..?” urged Nagisa, his eyes wide.

“Perhaps we could offer our guidance. We may only be his lowerclassmen, but I believe we possess more experience in the field of interpersonal relationships than Haruka-senpai.”

“Whatever gave you that idea?” laughed Nagisa. “So it’s settled! We’ll bug him every day until he makes a friend in class!”

“Not exactly what I had in mind, but an acceptable compromise,” mused Rei. “Very well, Nagisa-kun. Tomorrow we shall commence Operation: Companions for Haruka-senpai!”

“That’s the spirit, Rei-chan!” cheered Nagisa, pouncing Rei in a hug that soon had them rolling about in bed. “Don’t worry Haru-chan!” he cried with glee as Rei flailed around in his grasp, “We’ll get you a soul mate if it’s the last thing we do…!”

“If you don’t get off me, Nagisa-kun, I promise you that this is the last thing _you_ will do!!”

“Awww, Rei-chaaan..!”


	2. EPISODE 1: Reunion at the Starting Block! - Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next morning found Haruka a wreck in the ruins of his scrunched up sheets and tangled duvets. He might as well had slept, for he found no answers in the pale glare of the moon or the sharp rustle of wind-whipped trees, no well of wisdom in the deep chasm of his addled mind. Having wasted several hours of rest on aimless thoughts and fever dreams, he had just enough time to dress and pack his schoolbag, then left without so much as breakfast, let alone lunch to eat on the roof with Rei and Nagisa. He was conscious of the first mistake – the obscene grunts of his stomach were hard to ignore –, but only realized the second well on his way to school, when he searched his pockets in vain for his wallet. An empty stomach and the dull throbs of a swelling headache soon darkened even the brightest of prospects. By the time Haruka arrived, he sank into his seat like a corpse, bracing himself for the inevitable, a normally uneventful first day steadily heading towards disaster.

His classmates were gathering inside one by one, each checking their assigned seats before immediately rejoining their friends again in happy conversation that made Haruka slump in his seat and rest his head in the cradle of his arms. He did not go unnoticed, but his attention was not solicited by anyone in particular. A few quiet hellos were answered by little more than slight nods of the head, and his former classmates knew him well enough not to bother him any more.

Most of his class had remained the same, which Haruka acknowledged with a sense of complacency, even gratefulness. It was always the unfamiliar faces, the unexpected new arrivals who were dangerous: each and every one could be another Matsuoka Rin, a blooming camaraderie turned betrayal. He only spotted a few this time, most likely transfer students from another school. One of them sat down next to him, greeting him with a smile. Haru nodded to him, then turned his head away towards the window, severing all attempts at communication for the present.

If it hadn’t been for a constant volley of sunbeams coming through the window next to him, Haru’s heavy eyelids might have closed for good. His classmates’ voices soon became no more than indistinguishable humming to his ears, while his every atom longed for nothing more than the release of sleep. He begrudgingly resisted for one reason only. If his homeroom teacher was indeed new, then introductions would be obligatory, and nothing annoyed Haruka more than the ambiguity of his name.

A sudden death to all conversation alerted Haru to the arrival of their homeroom teacher, who greeted the class in a soft lilt as she proceeded to the podium, a large dark folder in her arms. She opened it, no doubt to read the student roster, holding it up so close her nose nearly brushed the page. Row call now began from the rightmost row of desks, front to back.

“Tadokoro Junichi-kun!”

“Here.”

“Tezuka Kaori-san.”

“Here!”

Haruka glared in front of himself, trying to ignore the stray glances in his general direction. The guy next to him kept turning his head to each student named, as if trying to follow the list on the go and memorize the faces attached to those names. Haruka would soon be next, to be looked at and perhaps laughed at. _Annoying._

“Um…” Hopefully she would look up from the roster…

“Nanase Haruka-san!” _Of course she didn’t._

Haruka was used to being mistaken for a girl by name, but no passage of time could make the hapless giggles of those around him any less irritating. He closed his eyes in displeasure and was about to reply with a quiet _Here_ , but before he could, the unthinkable happened. The new student next to him raised his hand to the side with a sense of urgency, and before their teacher could repeat the name, he cried,

“Sensei! Haruka’s a guy!”

Haru’s eyes shot open, lifting his head with a look of disbelief. _Who does this guy think he is?_ The once orderly silence dissolved into chuckles, and the teacher finally lowered her folder to get a good look at Haruka. She let out a squeak.

“Oh, you’re right!” she said, glancing around in search of whoever had just spoken, but unable to discern the owner of the voice among all those amused faces, she quickly turned her attention back to Haruka, who glared at his desk in contempt. “I’m sorry, Nanase-kun. You were absent yesterday, right? I’m Amakata Miho, your new homeroom teacher. Nice to meet you.”

Haru nodded in response, as politely as his foul mood would allow. He resolved not to look, but he itched to turn and glare at the culprit. _What a meddlesome guy._ The teacher was about to call him and Haruka closed his eyes, eager to commit the name to memory so he would know whom to avoid for the rest of his school career.

“Let’s see…” continued Amakata-sensei, lifting up the roster again. “Tachibana Makoto-san!”

The boy’s hand shot up again. “Sensei, I’m a guy too!”

There was no helping it. The entire classroom erupted in laughter, and to add insult to injury, Tachibana turned to Haru and whispered, his features unforgivably relieved,

“I’m glad I’m not the only guy with a girly name..!”

* * *

Haru ignored Tachibana as best he could for the rest of class, or rather he convincingly pretended to do so, having nothing to take his mind off the offender or his crime. Worse, hunger was slowly but surely getting the better of him. The growls of his stomach became more frequent and just a bit louder each time, until he had to start coughing to mask the sound. However, a cough every few minutes from third period onwards soon turned his throat into a dry pipe, and when he raised his fist to his mouth in the middle of fifth period to cough again, nothing came but a hoarse gust of air… and then a cough that wasn’t his. Haru whipped his head to the side, discovering to his horror that it was Tachibana with his fist raised to his mouth, and when the danger was over, he turned to flash Haru a smile. He cocked his head slightly to the side as he did so, his upturned eyebrows peaceful arches and his lips curling in happy contentment that seemed to light up his entire face. Haruka had never seen a smile that radiant or warm. More than warm, it was scorching, hot enough to sear his own cheeks a light pink in embarrassment. He quickly took his eyes off Tachibana and fixed them on his text book, having quite forgotten what the teacher was even talking about. A sudden stab of pain to his stomach forced his hand to sink down and press to his abdomen. Another roar came at once, to be drowned out by Tachibana’s second cough. Haru’s eyes grew larger.

 _He wants something from me,_ came the alarming thought. _What does he want? What an awful, meddlesome guy. Who asked him to do any of this? Who does he think he is?_

When Haru’s stomach growled again, he quickly drew his fist to his lips in defiance, but Tachibana was faster. Haru’s hand clenched tightly for one moment more, then dropped into his lap in defeat. It was no use. Tachibana carried on in his place until fifth period ended and lunch break began, when the ring of the bell told Haruka he was finally free to escape.

Perhaps he would have, too, had he anything to eat, but just the thought of climbing all those stairs only to watch Nagisa stuff his face felt like entirely too much effort. Lack of sleep chipped away at his will one painful throb at a time and anchored Haru to his desk, turning his limbs into lead. Everyone else was either leaving or sitting down to unpack their bentos and surely enough Tachibana took out his, handsomely wrapped in an orange furoshiki. How proper, how inviting it looked, and oh, how it sickened Haruka to the core of his being. He lowered his head not to stare as the box was uncovered and its lid lifted.

“It’s lunch break,” spoke Tachibana, eyeing Haru with a concerned look. “You can eat now, Nanase-kun. You brought lunch, right?”

Haru clenched his jaw. He pushed back his chair and rose, his hands curling into fists.

“What do you want from me?” he rasped, refusing to look the other in the eye once he realized how hoarse his voice had grown from straining his throat so much.

“Eh..?”

 _Stop talking to him, this guy is dangerous, he’s even worse than Rin, just ignore him and go,_ rang the alarm in Haruka’s head, but any filter he normally hid behind was failing him at such obviously feigned innocence. His stomach churned with a roar of anguish.

“Why are you bothering me?” he demanded, finally turning to look at Tachibana, “Why don’t you just leave me—”

“Here,” said Tachibana, holding out what appeared to be a sandwich wrapped in foil. Haru froze, his lips still parted, but no sound came – even the original utterance had been wiped from his mind. His hand twitched up instinctively, and by the time he stringed together a weak refusal in his head, he was already holding the parcel, past the point of no-return. “It’s not much, but it should tide you over until you get home.”

Haruka was too stunned to reply, but the gleam of his eye and the apparent lack of reproach were met with another smile, a simple, humble one that spoke of wanting nothing, not even a thank you.

“See you later, Nanase-kun,” said Tachibana, and with a last glance, he and his bento disappeared, no doubt to explore the school for an agreeable place to eat what remained of his lunch. Haru stared after him dumbfounded until his stomach growled again, forcing him to glance down at the sandwich. He now had food and no more excuses not to go, and so to the roof he went, furrowing his brow all the way in shame and discomfort.

* * *

Haru half expected, half dreaded Tachibana also choosing the roof, but when he finally appeared in the door, the only familiar faces around were Rei and Nagisa by the railing.

“Haru-chan, Haru-chan! Over here!” cried Nagisa with a frantic wave of his arms. Haru tensed his shoulders and walked over quickly, passing a couple of girls by the wall. One of them peered after him. He didn’t notice.

“You finally showed up, Haruka-senpai..!” sighed Rei in relief. He adjusted his glasses with a finger and added, “I could just barely dissuade Nagisa-kun from starting his lunch without you.”

“That was unnecessary,” replied Haru, his voice breaking up like a bad signal.

“You sound terrible, Haruka-senpai,” said Rei, now rather confused about the state of his friend’s health. Haru offered no explanation beyond the shrug of his shoulders. Nagisa eyed the parcel in his hand with a grin.

“What did you bring, Haru-chan?”

“Nothing.”

“Then what’s that?” pointed Nagisa. Haru made a face and turned his head.

“I don’t know. I didn’t bring it,” he said, then sighed. No amount of roundabout explanations would suffice with someone as nosy as Nagisa. “Someone gave it to me.”

“Eh?!” cried Nagisa. “Someone gave you their lunch? Luckyyy..!”

“Haruka-senpai…” breathed Rei. “Could it be that you… have made a _companionship..?_ ”

Haru glared at Rei, twisting his head sharply away, but he could still feel their hungry gazes behind the tight veils of his eyelids, forced to lean backwards as they eagerly loomed forward to quiz him.

“Come on, Haru-chan, tell us!”

“Talk to us, Haruka-senpai!”

“Is it a girl or a boy?”

“Are they respectable?”

“Bet they are really sweet..!”

“Say something, Haruka-senpai—”

“If you don’t stop bothering me, you can eat by yourselves,” snapped Haruka with flashing eyes. Nagisa whined in disappointment. Even Rei allowed himself to openly pout at being denied any disclosure, but Haru proved immovable, in spirit at least. He took a few steps away from them and settled by the railing, turning the foil-covered parcel in his hands, while Nagisa and Rei scooted beside him to unwrap their bentos.

All three of them were soon leaning against the railing, free to stare at the pink clouds of cherry trees in the distance, and once his friends had started eating, Haru finally let himself peel the foil off the top corner of the sandwich. He entertained no hopes of it being the least bit edible – if fate had deemed it fit to taunt him thus far, there was every reason to expect something disgusting inside –, but upon unwrapping a good portion of the sandwich, Haruka found that everything within looked fresh and inviting, and one small bite confirmed that there was indeed some justice left in this world. He took a larger bite next, then another, and as he did, irritation and bitterness slowly crumbled away from him like petals from those distant cherry trees. No strong emotion replaced them. What came instead was a sense of calm contentment that flowed through Haruka in waves, strange and new and almost disturbing in how easily it lulled him into standing still, eyes absent and body relaxed.

Rei and Nagisa noticed it, too. The overall effect was so becoming, so unaffected compared to the way Haruka usually stood, eyes cold and eternally bracing himself against others, that they could not help but marvel at him between sips of water and hurried mouthfuls of rice and Iwatobi Cream Bread. Only once he caught them staring did the enchantment break and Haru revert to his former defensive state. He quickly turned his head away from the others, who exchanged meaningful glances, looking forward to discussing these exciting developments after school. Indeed, sixth period afforded time enough to engage in vivid guesswork about Haru’s newfound “friend,” who, unbeknownst to every party present, was enjoying his lunch on a sunlit patch of grass just on the other side of the building, in plain view from the roof.

When everyone was finished, Haru pocketed the tinfoil, his friends gathered their lunchboxes, and the three of them turned to leave, passing the girl who had been looking at them without any of them noticing her.

* * *

Nagisa’s head buzzed with a myriad of questions as they ate, mostly about Haru’s mysterious benefactor, the sudden change of his voice, and the pool he could see from the roof, empty and forsaken except for the cherry trees standing guard beyond the fence. The pool seemed to belong to the school grounds, so he made a mental note to ask Haru about it later. There was no time at present for idle chitchat. Speed was of the essence in resolving one last issue on Nagisa’s agenda, and the last few minutes of their lunch break seemed like the most favorable time to launch his attack.

“Hey, have you heard? The swimming club we used to go to is gonna be torn down soon,” Nagisa began, skipping down the stairs gleefully, then jumping from the last few steps to the landing. “So before that happens, why don’t we pay a visit?”

“Do you mean… to dig up the capsule?” replied Rei, still standing by the door.

“Exactly! We can sneak in at night…” Nagisa carried on, imitating the quiet stalk of some nocturnal creature, no doubt. He had given Haruka pause, but he resisted. To heed the calls of his memories, to let his curiosity or nostalgia get the better of him would have been foolish and troublesome.

“You can go by yourselves,” he said, fixing his eyes on the opposite wall as he began his descent down the stairs, his expression perfectly nonchalant.

“Don’t say that!” cried Nagisa, shifting on the stairs to block Haruka’s path. “Come with us, Haru-chan!”

“I’m not going.”

“Don’t you think it’ll be fun?”

“I don’t.”

“With all due respect, Haruka-senpai, Nagisa-kun does have a point,” mused Rei, his brow creasing in contemplation. “It _is_ an act of trespassing and I would normally disapprove, but I believe we may safely consider the capsule our rightful property and shouldn’t leave it there to be destroyed.”

“I’m not going! It’s too much effort,” was Haru’s only reply, twisting his head sharply away to end the conversation. Nagisa did waver in the face of such obduracy, but only for a moment. A surge of longing for adventure, to reminisce one more time before their past would be torn from the ground turned his welling disappointment into a spirit of unyielding fervor.

“Fine, Haru-chan, just sit in your house all alone while Rei-chan and I go by ourselves!” he snapped, advancing further and further upward until he backed Haruka into a corner by the door that led directly to the roof. “Bury your head in the sand while we go see the pool and claim our prize from the yard, but let me tell you, I’m warning you, Haru-chan, if you don’t come with us tonight, you will regret it for the rest of your life! Is that what you want, Haru-chan? Do you want to live in constant regret?!”

There was no escape for Haruka, not even enough space to turn his head, and tilting his chin upward until the top of his head bonked against the wall was just as useless as resistance generally turned out to be against someone as energetic and willful as Nagisa. All Haru could do in this sad state, utterly convinced that he would never hear the end of it if he did not go, was sigh as painfully as possible and reply,

“I will check out the pool. That’s all.”

“I knew you would, Haru-chan!” gushed Nagisa in triumph, throwing himself at Haruka in an affectionate bear hug. Rei, an advocate of more subtle techniques, merely shook his head.

“I believe we will need a spade, Nagisa-kun,” was all he permitted himself to say, confident that everything else was now taking its proper course.

“Leave it to Haru-chan!” replied Nagisa without missing a beat. “His house has a garden so he must have a spade, too!”

“That makes sense,” conceded Rei. Haru glared at them, to no effect. “Let’s meet this evening then, after dinner?”

“Seven o’clock, at Haru-chan’s house! I can’t wait!” chirped Nagisa, bounding down the stairs with obvious satisfaction. Rei hurried after him to make sure he didn’t trip and fall in his enthusiastic dash downstairs, while Haruka followed them with lurching steps, thoroughly exhausted by the whole affair.

* * *

Glad as Haru was to escape Nagisa and Rei (with company, he had always found that a little went a _long_ way), he returned to class with a great deal of reluctance, all of it pertaining to Tachibana Makoto. He tossed the crumpled foil into a trashcan on his way, destroying all evidence except for the satisfied silence of his stomach, but the gesture obviously did not die with its consumed object. The giver had to be dealt with and dealt with definitively as to prevent any future instances of unsolicited charity… but how? The situation seemed like a dangerous Catch 22. Were he to thank the guy, perhaps Tachibana would regard him as a grateful recipient on whom he might lavish more unwanted attention, which was no good, but ignoring him and potentially provoking him to do something on a grander scale to be noticed would have been equally bothersome. As to scolding him when Haru did eat the sandwich and absorbed its benefits, it seemed wholly out of the question for more reasons than the obvious. The Rin he remembered always had a certain air of wildness about him, lively and sharp and dangerous, but as easily as Haru could suspect him, he had a harder time imputing hidden motives to Tachibana. Haruka’s feet had since carried him to the classroom and he paused by the door, peering inside carefully. As expected, there sat the source of all his current troubles, feet tucked under his chair and arms resting on his desk waiting patiently for the next class to begin. He looked like an overgrown child with those large, drooping eyes and upturned eyebrows, his expression so soft and artless as to render him no more threatening than a large puppy dog (though amiable as puppy dogs were, one would still find them annoying in large doses). Haru sighed. The class was large and Tachibana seemed good nature itself. _He’ll find new friends soon enough._

Having reached that conclusion, Haruka entered the classroom and slowly made his way between the rows of desks to his own spot in the far corner. Tachibana noticed him and flashed him a smile that Haru failed to return, giving him only the smallest nod as he sat down.

“Was it okay, Nanase-kun?” asked Tachibana almost immediately. Haru tensed, but soon gave him a small hum in reply.

“Good. I’m glad.”

Haru risked a glance at him but found no condescension in Tachibana’s tone or the open, honest arches of his face. If he didn’t know better, he might have supposed him to be caring and kind to anyone, even strangers. But that seemed improbable, highly improbable. Tachibana must have simply been the sort of person that just said whatever was on their mind at the time and sometimes ended up sounding like he genuinely cared, even when there was little to no foundation for such feelings. Haru slowly turned his head toward the window, unsure if he could carry the conversation much further without annoyance when he was unable to dismiss what seemed like an earnest display of concern for his wellbeing. _It’s probably because he’s new here. He’s trying too hard._

It was safest to leave it at that. Any considerations of deeper feelings than that of superficial politeness would have been to invest too much hope in Tachibana’s character, and Haru was adamant not to be disappointed again.

The rest of class went by uneventful. There was no more need to cough, Haru’s headache was dissipating, and he had taken great pains to carefully keep his eyes off Tachibana. This was Haruka’s last refuge in any scenario. If the problem could not be solved, it was to be ignored, and unlike Rin or Nagisa, who pursued relentlessly after him, Tachibana mounted no attacks beyond a few short glances that Haruka stubbornly refused to acknowledge. He reserved all his energies for the last battle, the end of the school day where suggestions like walking home together might be raised, and had to be promptly turned down before the other could latch and sink his hooks too deep.

The bell rang, class was officially dismissed, and surely enough, Tachibana turned to him, but Haru kept his eyes firmly on his books, which he ended up shoving into his backpack. The other paused, and before he could resume, Haru stood and pulled the backpack over his shoulder.

“See you tomorrow, Nanase-kun,” said Tachibana in a soft tone, evidently bested in this round.

“Bye,” replied Haruka, proceeding outside.

Their exchange was exactly as it ought to be: undemanding, unpromising, unthreatening. Tachibana did not even move from his desk to follow him, yet Haru’s steps were getting quicker every second, hurrying past idling high-schoolers and jogging all the way to the bicycle rack. He grabbed his bike and mounted it at once, raising a cloud of dust as he swiveled towards the gate, and he didn’t stop until he reached the unconquerable stone steps that led to his house uphill. It was quite a climb for someone no longer used to exercise. By the time Haruka reached the top, his lungs were threatening to collapse in the effort. He dragged himself inside the house and collapsed unceremoniously in the entrance hall, holding his aching side and scolding himself silently for the cowardly stunt. There was no reason to suppose Tachibana lived anywhere along his usual route if he hadn’t met him until today, but trusting fate so blindly as to chance even one unwanted meeting was inviting trouble that was already scratching at the threshold of his small, vulnerable world. Little remained untouched within his walls, but that precious little had to be protected, and so Haru resigned himself to the idea that he might have to run home every single day for hereafter to avoid the unwanted acquaintance.

His mouth twisted in resentment. If the rest of his days were doomed to be just like this one, he would be in great danger of hating Tachibana for inheriting the sins and stigmas of a former transfer student he had never even met.


	3. EPISODE 1: Reunion at the Starting Block! - Part 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

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> This title card was my first attempt at editing screencaps to fit this story. Enjoy!

As the sun began its inevitable descent, Haruka, too, started his preparations for the upcoming venture. Nagisa guessed correctly: he did find a spade in the backyard shed, old but clean and serviceable, so it wound up in the entrance hall for the time being, abandoned by the shoe cabinet as Haru left for the kitchen. He raided the cooler, donned the old threadbare apron that once belonged to his late grandmother, and fried a couple fillets of mackerel for dinner: his consolation prize after all the indignities he had suffered, the only comfort he could truly call constant. It could not turn back time, but it could soothe. For now, that was enough.

The bell rang just as he had finished and Haru rose from his empty plate, still irritated that Nagisa insisted on his house as their meeting point. They could have just gone straight to the old swimming club – it would have been the logical, reasonable thing to do. Haru smelled a conspiracy brewing. Things felt no different from having been accompanied on runs when he was younger, obliged to adjust his pace to the little ones gasping for air behind him.

The door was slowly unlocked and slid open just enough for Haruka to poke out his head, keeping his expression guarded. Nagisa and Rei had since exchanged their school uniforms for casual clothes, but Rei retained his backpack. Nagisa appeared to be empty-handed. Haru suspected that Rei was carrying whatever contributions his friend decided to make.

“Hey, Haru-chan!” Nagisa greeted him, sniffing into the air. “What smells so good?”

“Mackerel.”

“Ah, delicious! Haru-chan must be a great cook. Is there any more?”

 _Bottomless stomach._ “I ate it.”

“Aww…”

“Good evening, Haruka-senpai,” said Rei with a small nod of his head. “Did you manage to find a spade?”

“Yeah.”

Haruka quickly stepped inside, grabbed the handle, then let himself out, locking the door before anyone could suggest tea or needless idling about. Nagisa’s face scrunched up in a pout when his chance for free food slipped away, but he perked up the very moment he spotted the spade. He snatched it out of Haru’s hand, lifting it like a hero thrusting their weapon at the sky.

“Now, onward to adventure!” he cried happily, shoving the spade into Rei’s hands once his war battle cry was over. Rei sighed as he took the spade with all the dignity of the designated pack mule, his brow creasing in thought.

“Are you sure this is really a good idea, Nagisa-kun?” he said cautiously, lowering the spade by his side. Nagisa blinked.

“Weren’t you all for it earlier, Rei-chan? Don’t tell me you are getting scared..!”

“Of course not! Fear is unbecoming!” snapped Rei, straightening his shoulders to appear better composed than he felt. “What I mean is… is this really the best way to do it? Three is such an ominous number. It is incomplete. Symbolically speaking, four is the number of perfection, of the complete whole… three is just not beautiful.”

“Well, we can’t do anything about that now… Rin-chan isn’t in Japan anymore.”

Haruka’s gaze drifted into space. Why did he keep thinking about Rin…?

_“I won’t be attending middle school here.”_

_Rin’s words, so casually and whimsically uttered under the brick-trapped cherry tree, felt like a slap in the face. Haru’s eyes widened as he quickly turned to look at the other boy, his features tense in anger. They were alone in the yard. Everyone else had gone home by then. There was no one to interrupt and hijack the conversation, no one to question how Rin had the audacity to speak so calmly about leaving them, leaving_ him _behind._

_“What are you talking about?” asked Haru when the silence could be held no longer._

_“I’m going to Australia,” replied Rin, arms raised and hands cupping the back of his head, his eyes on the cherry tree. “I sent in my application to study abroad and the results came in yesterday. I’m going to a swimming school.”_

_Haru glared at him, then turned away in a flash of gritted teeth, his own eyes falling to the bricks they had molded with their own hands in art class, which now bore various mottos written in crayon. His read ‘Free’ while Rin’s was marked ‘For the Team,’ very appropriate at the time it was written, but now that cheerful message was just another stab in the back. Being a team, swimming a medley relay together was all Rin ever talked about, as though standing on his own held no value compared to the camaraderie of his peers…_ What a joke _. Haru shouldn’t have gotten involved with him. He should have heeded the warning signs and realized that the idea of someone who was earnest and enduring in all their engagements was too good to be true._ What are you trying to do? Just how selfish can you get, you jerk? _he thought to himself, his fists clenched._

 _"I’m going to study swimming there to become an Olympic swimmer," declared Rin with the glowing self-confidence thirteen-year-olds so safely boasted before the first waves of life’s challenges washed them ashore. Haruka immediately thought of kids telling adults how they would be astronauts or the prime minister when they grew up._ What a stupid thing to say, _he thought to himself, uselessly wishing he were elsewhere, anywhere but alone in the yard with this incomprehensible jerk._

_“What about the relay?” he forced himself to ask, getting nasty ideas in his head. Rin shrugged and sank his hands into his pockets, taking a few steps towards the gate._

_“I’ll swim in the relay. I’m leaving the day after the tournament. So… this will be the last time the four of us swim together.”_

_Haru’s face hardened, his jaws clenched not to twitch, not to writhe in bitterness at having been nothing but a mere pawn in Rin’s game. As surely as he teased and coaxed Nagisa and Rei along, exploiting the little ones’ eagerness to swim with “the pros,” he had strung up Haruka with wires that would soon be severed as the puppeteer retired from the stage… and what then? Would Haru have to drag the dead remains of his hold for the rest of his life?_

_“I only swim free,” said Haruka in defiance, but Rin didn’t seem to catch his meaning. He reached out his hand and caught a few leaves floating midair, closing his fingers upon them._

_“That’s why you have to swim in the relay. This is our last chance,” came the answer as Rin turned back to Haru, his look determined. “Let’s swim together, Nanase – the alpha and the omega. If you swim with me,” he continued with a smile, and Haruka was drawn to look him in the eye despite himself, “I’ll show you a sight you’ve never seen before!”_

* * *

Night soon fell upon the desolate ruins of their former swim club, the moon painting ominous shadows in the cracks of a dozen broken windows. Sun and rain had left their marks on the once bright and happy mural of a swimming child, smearing its eyes and mouth until they ran dark and grotesque, doomed to laugh and cry blood till the end of its days. Rei took one look at it and his hands tightened on the spade, holding it in front of himself like a ward. Even Nagisa’s face seemed stern and solemn as he walked around Rei to unzip his backpack.

“How could they let it fall into such a sad state,” whispered Rei, unable to raise his voice. “It looks absolutely disgraceful…”

Nagisa found what he was looking for and took out a bundle, untying the knot to reveal a small pile of white powder.

“Here, just in case,” he said, holding it out. “Purifying salt.”

“Purifying salt…?” echoed Rei. “Why on earth—”

“They say the place is haunted,” replied Nagisa, staring up at the building.

“Stop talking nonsense, Nagisa-kun…” muttered Rei, his skin riddled with goose bumps.

“I’m not lying,” insisted Nagisa, turning to look him dead in the eye. Rei let out a yelp. “People have been seeing shadows moving around and hearing sobbing voices,” explained Nagisa, the tone of his voice needlessly dramatic. He always had a penchant for cheap thrills and cheesy horror movies, and the abandoned swimming club seemed like the perfect setting, their very own haunted mansion. Rei shuddered.

“Stand still, Rei-chan,” said Nagisa next, tossing white dust at Rei from several angles. “Okay, you're next, Haru-chan,” he continued, giving Haruka the same treatment. Some of the fine powder found its way into Haru’s mouth. His eyes went wide.

“Hey,” he said, gathering a few flecks on his finger to taste.

“What is it, Haruka-senpai..?” asked Rei, clutching the spade just a little tighter.

“This isn’t salt. It’s sugar,” came the calm reply. Nagisa’s eye twitched and Rei let out a cry of anguish. He began to dust himself vigorously, scattering sugar everywhere.

“Is that why you went into the kitchen, Nagisa-kun?! How many times do I have to tell you that salt is on the left and sugar is on the right?!”

“You can’t expect me to remember everything!” whined Nagisa, staring at his empty handkerchief in disappointment. “But it’s all mental anyway, so sugar will still get the job done!”

“Clichéd as hell,” muttered Haru.

“Never mind that, Haru-chan..!” said Nagisa as he stuffed the handkerchief right back inside Rei’s backpack and dug out a large flashlight. “Let’s go in, shall we?”

“You’re enjoying this, aren’t you, Nagisa-kun…” grumbled Rei. He received no reply.

It was easy enough to find their way inside. The front door appeared loose, as though it had already been pried open before them. Haru held it for the others while Nagisa switched on the flashlight, entering first as their unofficial tour guide. They stepped into a barren lobby where the air lay stagnant, and everything felt dead except the three teenagers creeping down the main hall with silent, careful steps. The wind picked up outside and the building sighed with aching creaks, drawing ragged breaths through splintered glass.

“This is eerie…” groaned Rei, keeping as close to the others as possible while his eyes wandered, imagining danger in every corner. “Do you think anyone has been here since—” he continued to say, when a sharp rattle startled him into swinging his spade upward with a loud “ _AAAHH!!_ ”

“Oops.. sorry, Rei-chan,” said Nagisa, scratching the back of his head with an embarrassed smile in the pale glare of his flashlight. “My foot hit an empty can.”

“Are doing this on purpose, Nagisa-kun?!” snapped Rei, wagging the spade menacingly.

“Are you scared of the dark..?”

“ _I am not!_ ”

“Can we go on?” came Haru’s voice, placid as ever.

“Sorry, Haru-chan… Follow me!” said Nagisa and they carried on, completely oblivious of the shadow looming just behind them.

* * *

“This brings back memories,” breathed Nagisa as the flashlight’s blaze fell on rows of pink and blue lockers gaping emptily at dog-eared mats on the floor. Past the cheerful dolphin and crab painted on their blocks were the showers, mostly intact except for a few missing ceramic tiles, and a thick, pervasive coat of dust.

“It’s not as terrible inside as I expected,” said Rei, sounding relieved. Derelict as these showers looked, he embraced them with tender nostalgia. How often had he used to come in here himself, always choosing the shower by the innermost wall so he could safely store his glasses on the windowsill? How often had he and Nagisa dried their hair by the row of white sinks, Nagisa so small he could easily use the hand dryer for the top of his head? The memory made him lift a hand to hide his grin.

“What is it, Rei-chan?” asked Nagisa. Rei pursed his lips.

“Nothing, Nagisa-kun.. Let’s move on.”

“Okay,” came the swift reply. Nagisa then tried another door. “Wait… this is...”

“The lounge,” said Rei. The center of the room was empty, with overturned benches on all sides and more cracked, gaping windows, as though a scuffle had taken place and only its sad aftermath remained… but not quite. There, just on the opposite wall hung pictures in dusty frames, an almost complete set judging by a darker patch of wall by a cluster of what must have once been eight photographs instead of seven. Nagisa immediately ran over to check them, and next to that dark patch of wall, he found treasure.

“Hurry up!” he cried for the others, pointing proudly to a photograph where four boys stood side by side in swim briefs and gold medals, posing with their first prize. A black-haired boy with his head turned archly to the side, held in place by a laughing boy with red hair and a trophy as long as his torso. Beside him stood two more boys, blond and blue, their fists raised in the air as though they were playfully mirroring each other.

“Look! This is the picture from when we won the relay...”

Haru fixed his eyes on those boys and his heart gave a leap, tearing past the dusty veils of his memories and racing down to that legendary starting block, where Rin was the alpha and he was the omega, the beginning and the end, backstroke and front crawl. _There he stood in his white cap and tinted goggles, his young body tense as he waited for Rei’s butterfly to reach the wall. Rei’s hands smacked against it and Haru flew into the air, carried on the wings of Rin’s voice as he screamed Haruka’s name in ecstasy._

 _“I’ll show you a sight you’ve never seen before,”_ _he said to Haruka under that cherry tree, and when the water embraced him, there was a burst of energy, propelling him forward as though the water had come alive._

_The trophy they had won was enormous and handsome. Any one of them would have been glad to take it home, but Rin had a different idea._

_“The four of us won it together, so it doesn’t make sense for one person to take it home,” he explained as he dug a hole in the backyard of the swimming club, the trophy waiting by his feet in a large cookie tin. “So let’s put it in a time capsule and dig it up when we’re grown up,” continued Rin, pressing the lid down firmly before lowering the cookie tin into its final resting place. Nagisa and Rei looked perfectly happy with the decision, but Haru showed no emotion. Perhaps that was why Rin turned to him directly, positively beaming._

_“Romantic, right?” he said with a toothy grin. Haru gave a small_ hmph _and turned his head, his only means of resistance in the face of a boy who had wrapped them around his finger with his dramatic notions and self-absorbed charm, an incomprehensible, selfish jerk whose suitcase was already packed at home._ Just go, _thought Haru back then, the warmth of their friendship growing colder with every minute of Rin’s cheerful dissembling._ I hope you never come back again.

_“Haruka-senpai…”_

“Haruka-senpai.”

Haru blinked. Nagisa and Rei were already by the door, looking back at him in surprise and concern.

“Let’s go, Haruka-senpai.”

“Yeah...” sighed Haruka, leaving those picture-perfect boys behind.

* * *

“Think the marker is still there?” asked Nagisa as they passed another corridor, his eyes always eagerly fixed ahead. Haruka followed him without the slightest hint of interest in his surroundings while Rei trailed behind, peering down every hall they came across just to be safe… only to be spooked by a dark figure looming in the far end, which now moved towards them at a slow, steady pace.

“Gah!! Who’s there..?” Rei called out, just barely suppressing the shake of his voice. He swung the spade in front of himself, brandishing it like a spear. “Don’t come any closer! _I have a weapon!_ ”

“What’s wrong, Rei-chan?” Nagisa hurried over, dragging Haru along with him. The figure was still advancing in a casual stride, eyes boring into Haruka’s in a clash of red and blue. Haru froze. The stranger came to a halt.

“ _Yo,_ ” he called out to them, tugging the visor of his baseball cap downwards.

“Who is it?” whispered Nagisa, turning to the others.

“I have no idea,” replied Rei, still holding up the spade in self-defense. Haru was silent.

“I didn’t think I’d run into you guys here,” came that voice again as the stranger hooked one finger into the belt of his cap, snapping it like one would tighten a pair of goggles. Nagisa and Rei gasped in unison, their shock complete when the baseball cap was removed to uncover longish red hair, just as they remembered.

“Rin-senpai!” “Rin-chan!” they cried at the same time, surprised and overjoyed at meeting a long-lost friend, whose face nonetheless betrayed no tender feelings for them. If anything, Rin looked as bored and glum as his dark clothes – nothing like the grinning, willful brat that left them years ago. Blissfully oblivious of how unwanted they were, Nagisa lunged forward to grasp Rin’s arm.

“You’re back from Australia!”

“This is quite unexpected… What brings you here, Rin-senpai?” asked Rei, finally lowering the spade.

“It must be fate!” replied Nagisa, obviously delighted with himself for having arranged their visit so fortunately. “Some unseen force brought us all here at this exact—”

“ _Haru,_ ” Rin interrupted him, staring right through the others at his childhood rival. “You’re still hanging out with these guys…? You never learn.”

Nagisa’s eyebrows creased, his happiness popped like a balloon. Haruka’s face remained expressionless. Rei’s darkened.

“What do you mean by that, Rin-senpai?”

“What about you?” spoke Haru a moment later, silencing them again. He closed his eyes, censoring the provocative look on Rin’s face that sent tremors down his legs, which threatened to crumble from under him. “Have _you_ learned anything?”

“Haruka-senpai…” breathed Rei, not liking where the conversation was headed.

“I’m glad you asked,” said Rin, careening his head left and right to loosen the stiff joints of his neck. “Why don’t I show you? Let’s race, Haru.” And just like that, Rin started walking down the corridor he knew must lead to the pool.

“Did you say _race?_ ” asked Rei, but before he could finish, Haru began to follow Rin as though he were hypnotized, paying no heed to the others anymore. “Haruka-senpai! _Haruka-senpai!_ ”

“Did they just ditch us?” mumbled Nagisa, sounding stunned.

“It would appear so,” growled Rei, his hands on his hips and the spade sticking out to the side. The two exchanged glances. Their decision was instant.

“ _Wait for us!!_ ”

* * *

By the time Nagisa and Rei caught up to the others by the pool, Rin already tore off his shirt, tossing it to the ground in one fluid motion.

“I’ll show you how different we are now,” he said darkly, gaze intense as Haru stripped and threw his own shirt away.

“Go ahead,” was the curt reply, the tone no less challenging.

“They’re going to swim here?” said Nagisa, thoroughly confused. Rei paused for a moment, then nearly dropped his spade as the pieces clicked.

“Wait, Haruka-senpai!” he cried, reaching out a hand. “You can’t swim in there!”

Haru didn’t even hear him. The next moment, his trousers hit the floor and Rei whipped up the spade to shield his eyes, only risking a peek once Nagisa began nudging him in the side. The peek turned into a baffled stare.

“Wh-What…?” mumbled Rei in disbelief. “Was Haruka-senpai wearing his swimsuit instead of underwear all along?! I don’t understand!”

“And Rin-chan, too!” Nagisa pointed out, watching Rin crouch and stretch in a black and red legskin that seemed transparent by the inner thighs. Haru’s black and purple jammers looked almost modest in comparison. They soon stood facing each other, their naked chests gleaming in the dim light.

“We have to stop them!” pleaded Rei.

“Do we really?”

“ _Nagisa-kun..!_ ”

They were too late. The race had already begun with both pacing towards the pool, not taking their eyes off each other for a moment as they broke into a dash towards the starting blocks.

“Let’s do this, Haru!” growled Rin, snapping his goggles into place. They conquered the starting blocks, bodies arched fiercely, tensing to Rin’s words of “Ready, G—”

One look at the pool itself and Rin fell into silence: had they let the roar of their blood carry them into the air, they might have hurled themselves towards a sad, untimely death. Nothing lay below but dry concrete, the abandoned pool yawning with a surreal emptiness that stunned them frozen upon the blocks. Nagisa turned on his flashlight and aimed it at the pool, frightening a small mouse that scurried off towards the drain.

“There isn’t any water,” he noted with an amused smile. Rei pushed up his glasses, his hand twitching in a show of frazzled nerves.

“Of course there isn’t any water in the pool of an abandoned building!” he snapped, glaring at the others. “Who in their right mind would suppose otherwise?!”

“Tch. _Lame,_ ” said Rin as he jumped off the starting block. Haruka remained where he stood for a moment longer, shoulders slack in disappointment. Rei was right. What did he expect? Why was he even here..?

Rin headed towards the exit, his business finished before it had even begun. Behind him, Haru finally stepped off the block, the others gathering by his side. Rin stopped.

“Oh yeah,” came his voice and the next moment, a glimmer in the dark – the trophy they had come to reclaim from the earth. When it fell back against Rin’s palm, he tossed it into the air and caught it again, as thought he were dangling a chew toy in front of a pack of hungry dogs. “Did you guys come here for this?”

“Our trophy!” gasped Nagisa in alarm.

“I don’t need this thing anymore,” said Rin, taking another step forward. His arm curled backwards and the trophy dropped to the floor, too quickly for any of them to even try and catch it. Rin walked on without another glance until darkness swallowed him whole, as though he had never been there.

“Rin-chan...” whispered Nagisa, not taking his eyes off the door as Rei walked over to pick up their prize, cradling it gently in his arms. “He’s changed…”

Behind them, Haruka stood frozen, eyes wide open and desperately wanting to wake up.

* * *

“I don’t want to be here anymore,” spoke Rei, tightening his hold on the trophy. Nagisa nodded.

“This way!” he called out to them, motioning to the hallway they had taken on their way to the pool. Rei ran over at once, leaving Haruka just enough time to snatch up his belongings and run after them barefooted. There were no more detours. They hurried to the front entrance as quickly as their legs could carry them, hoping nobody saw the way three boys came scrambling out of the building, like cockroaches frightened by the light switch.

They took refuge behind the bushes while Haru put his clothes and shoes back on. Rei watched him with a heavy look, then closed his eyes, taking a deep breath.

“Haruka-senpai…”

“What?” replied Haru, wondering why the others were still there. Rei looked him in the eye, almost forlorn as he slowly offered the trophy.

“You should have this, Haruka-senpai,” he said, holding it out until Haruka had no choice but to take it.

“Why?” he asked, turning it about in his hands. It felt cold and dead to his fingers. They should have never come here to find it.

“Because you’re the eldest, Haruka-senpai,” said Rei, plain and irrefutable.

“Take it, Haru-chan,” pleaded Nagisa, glancing sheepishly from one tired face to the other. “It will look good on your shelf.”

Haru resisted the urge to tell Nagisa that they might as well throw the trophy into the nearest trashcan because it was garbage. Rin certainly thought so, so why couldn’t he? But some things he had no power to say. Rei and Nagisa looked almost scared. What were they even afraid of? Didn’t they know none of this was real…?

The moment Haru took the trophy under his arm, Rei handed back the spade, then looked at his watch, clearing his throat just barely.

“We need to hurry if we want to catch the last train, Nagisa-kun,” he said in a hushed voice. Nagisa nodded, his eyes still large.

“Okay. Good night, Haru-chan,” he whispered.

“Good night, Haruka-senpai.”

“Night.”

After they left, Haru stood by the bushes for a while longer, caring little how suspicious he must have looked with a spade in one hand and an old trophy in the other. None of it mattered, though. He would wake up soon, that was what he told himself over and over as he headed home on his own, counting the stone steps all the way to his house. His head was swimming, but every moment bore the promise of that fragile _soon_ that would shatter the dream and set him free. The trophy grew so heavy in the climb, he could hardly bear it.

He stumbled through the door and dropped it along with the spade, crawling upstairs and right into his bed. He curled up and pulled the covers over himself, his mind so full of screams he thought he might scream in earnest and someone would hear him when nobody was there, nobody had ever been there, _no, No, NO, it wasn’t real,_ Rin was still in Australia, why would he reappear on the very same night they decided to go?

Was Rin still haunting him after all this time..?

.

. .

_No. It was a dream. ._

_Just a dream. . like always. . ._


	4. EPISODE 1: Reunion at the Starting Block! - Part 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  
> 
> This was my second edit for the story! Enjoy!

Haruka jolted from his sleep at dawn, rising from a fever dream that had him pinching himself just to be safe. It hurt, and he welcomed the raw sting with a sickening sense of relief. The thought that last night had all been in his head after all was so liberating, he gladly gave up another hour of rest for the certainty that he was irrefutably awake. Haru slipped out of bed at once and hurried down the stairs, ready to start his day right this time, only to freeze on the last step. In the entrance hall laid his spade, and the trophy that should have still been buried in the cold, dead earth.

Haru’s face hardened. Could he even try to pretend it had only been his imagination now that it all seemed to be real, painfully real in all its ill consequences? Was there any refuge for him in the cracks of reality, any small gap where Rin would not, could not follow? He doubted it. If Rin really did come back, he would claw his way back into Haruka’s life where he was still vulnerable, defenseless…

The trophy was quickly stuffed into the box that held every award Haru had won up until the age of thirteen. When it was time to close the cabinet, he slammed the door shut with such force it coaxed a soft hum from the bell on the family altar. Haru lifted his head, almost apologetically.

“Send help, Oba-chan,” he whispered as he lit the incense, staring wistfully at his late grandmother’s photograph. “I don’t want to go back there again.”

Only the pressing obligation of school attendance could persuade him to leave the room, pointedly ignoring the telltale spade as he hurried down to the kitchen. He had lied to Nagisa. There were still some leftovers from yesterday’s dinner, now piled carefully into one of his twin bentos while a fresh fillet sizzled away on the grill plate. The toast popped out just as Haru was ready to claim his grilled mackerel, uniting with the fish as a make-shift edible plate that Haru bit into with savage gusto. He would not starve today or need anyone’s charity, especially not Tachibana’s, to whom he still felt indebted in the most obnoxious way. Unlike those he had known longer, who would have immediately asked Haruka to repay them by helping with arts and crafts, or offering some token of equal value, Tachibana asked for nothing – _yet_. Haru couldn’t put it past him to slowly figure out over night that he was in a position to make demands Haruka’s sense of integrity would oblige him to fulfill, and so the danger lingered, just another cloud on the stormy horizon, and it had to wait. Haru had enough problems without him, and felt he could tolerate any accusations of ungratefulness if it led Tachibana to concentrate his noble efforts elsewhere. Haru could only hope the guy was not persistent or stubborn. There was nothing Haru could give him. The well of his generosity had long gone dry.

* * *

“Good morning, Nanase-kun,” Haru heard Tachibana say as he passed the guy’s desk on the way to his own. He plopped down on his chair, propping his backpack against the side, then turned to face Tachibana and look him dead in the eye, his mind fast-forwarding past the greetings and straight to the point, which was to state without any apparent precedent or reason,

“I brought lunch today.”

Tachibana let out a small _Oh?_ , but his eyes soon lit up in understanding. He flashed Haru one of those soft smiles from yesterday as he replied,

“That’s great. What did you bring?”

“Mackerel,” said Haru, then turned away from Tachibana to end the conversation. He heard a small hum in reply that he supposed was followed by another smile: he could almost feel its all-pervasive radiance that no barrier could truly keep at bay. It was annoying. What could the guy possibly be smiling about when Haru had just brushed him off after such a curt exchange? Was Tachibana _laughing_ at him? If he carried on like this for long, Haru felt he might grow to hate him even without Rin’s past crimes hanging over his head.

At any rate, his classmate seemed to have inferred that he had been dismissed, and did not engage Haruka in conversation again for the rest of the morning. To be fair, though, he simply had no opportunity or time. After second period, some of the girls began gathering around Tachibana’s desk to introduce themselves, having spent the first day of school rekindling old friendships instead of courting complete strangers.

They asked him the usual questions. Was he from around here? How did he like Iwatobi High School so far? Did he have a girlfriend? ( _Yes_ , _Very much_ , and _No_ , the last answer followed by much meaningful silence and a bit of giggling.) Haru’s face grew darker with each exchange, irritated beyond measure at having to listen, and sulking worse yet when Tachibana risked a sideways glance at him, as though he understood. One of the girls noticed and let out a good-humored _hmph_.

“Don’t mind Nanase-kun, he’s always like this,” she said, no doubt trying to dissolve the tension, and evidently failing as Haru shot their entire party a glare. The genial empty chatter of others was always more reprehensible the less it could be ignored, and no sharp turn of his head could reduce their noise or his malcontent, all of it entirely Tachibana’s fault. He had done nothing wrong _per se_ , but he was too friendly and he smiled too much. Worse, he was tall and good-looking, or so Haruka supposed, without any ounce of discernible conceit. Indeed, the more he begrudgingly listened to the guy – yes, he was going to take English, though he was never very good at it, no, he was not free this afternoon, he would have liked to go, but he had promised his little brother and sister he would help them with their project –, the more Haru was forced to admit, if only to himself in the smallest of voices, that he had no reason to think ill of Tachibana. The thought brought him little comfort, however. He remained as he was, neck twisted archly towards the window for the rest of the break, and should more people drift by to quiz Tachibana on his life history, Haru was in great danger of being stuck in this position for every break that would follow. His only consolation was that he had no obligations to Nagisa or Rei for the day. The world would be his oyster for lunch break if he could only find a good spot to whisk himself away and have his mackerel. That became his sole object for the day, and while there was hope of it, he could tolerate his classmates with equanimity… at least until the bell rang and all civility could be cast down like a useless robe. Speed was of the essence. Nothing mattered in comparison.

“So, Nanase-kun, do you want to have lunch together?” Haru heard Tachibana say, but he was already in motion, rising from the desk with his bento hugged firmly to his chest. He fixed his eyes on the door, shoulders stiff and posture tense, walking right past Tachibana’s desk without a word.

“…I guess not,” the other’s voice drifted after him, sounding more amused than disappointed. Haruka’s face darkened again.

* * *

Whether by sheer coincidence or the capriciousness of fate, Haru was eventually lured to the very same patch of green where Tachibana had eaten lunch the other day. The sun spilled its warmth and color magnanimously over the grass, so Haruka rolled onto his back, tucking his hands behind his head. Lunch could wait for a little longer… a nap first would be nice…

“Haru-chaaan!”

_…Or not._

“Good day, Haruka-senpai!” came Rei’s voice a moment after. They perched themselves to Haruka’s right, closer to the shade of the trees around them. “May we join you?”

“Do I have a choice?” muttered Haru, not bothering to open his eyes.

“Of course!” said Nagisa. “Your choice is _yes!_ ”

Haruka curled one arm over his eyes in surrender.

“Your lack of choice aside, Haruka-senpai, we were thinking that we should discuss last night,” said Rei as he pierced his strawberry drink with a straw and took a thoughtful sip, like some private detective smoking his pipe in contemplation. “Rin-senpai’s behavior—”

“What are you talking about?” replied Haru with forced evenness, keeping his arm firmly where it shielded him from their prying glances. “There is nothing to discuss. It wasn’t real.”

“What do you mean it wasn’t real?” balked Rei. “If it wasn’t real, what was it then?”

Haru’s arm slipped off and sunshine poured over his face in rays. He opened his eyes.

“A dream..?”

“No, it wasn’t a dream, Haruka-senpai!” snapped Rei, now just plain agitated. “It is highly improbable that three people should share the same dream with exact matching details!”

“I still don’t get it though,” mumbled Nagisa over a mouthful of Iwatobi Cream Bread. “Rin-chan was really weird…”

“Look-alike,” said Haru.

“What reason could a look-alike possibly have to challenge you to a race, Haruka-senpai?”

“A ghost, then.”

“He wasn’t floating,” remarked Nagisa.

“Doppelganger.”

“Oh, that takes me back!” spoke Rei, more cheerfully this time. “We used to do that at the Iwatobi Swimming Club, remember, Nagisa-kun?” He quickly put down his drink and straightened his back, arms swinging into place. “ _Super Fusion…_ ”

“ _…Doppelganger!_ ” cried Nagisa, mirroring Rei’s movements in perfect synch. They caught each other’s eyes and laughed, faces bright in the sunlight. Haru rolled onto his left side to turn his back on them.

“Keep it down.”

“Aww, come on, Haru-chan..!” whined Nagisa, but in a matter of moments, he perked up and said, “Ah, that reminds me, who’s your new friend?”

Haru’s face twitched. He was glad nobody saw. “I don’t have one.”

“Oh…? Did you break up?”

Haru bit his lip, sinking into stubborn silence as Nagisa and Rei took turns quizzing him, too irritated to answer, yet too lazy to move. They were loud and unscrupulous, each so absorbed in their small world they didn’t notice they had drawn spectators. Not too far away, two girls stood by the small bridge of an artificial brook coursing through the school yard, their eyes fixed on the boys.

“Do you know those guys?” one whispered to the other, who nodded sternly. She was the girl whom Haruka had passed as he joined Nagisa and Rei on the roof yesterday, but while none of them had noticed or recollected her, she remembered and remembered them well. She hummed.

“They are Nanase Haruka, Hazuki Nagisa, and Ryuugazaki Rei. What they have in common is that they used to belong to the same swimming club, and they’re all boys with girly names,” she told her friend Hanamura Chigusa, who stared at them in awe.

“What’s your relationship with them?” she whispered.

“That's a secret,” came the mysterious reply.

“Wait, that means you have something in common with them too, Gou,” replied Chigusa, “Since you’re a girl with a boyish name.”

She was pleased with her deduction, but the recipient, not so much.

“Seriously,” she snapped, turning on her friend, “ _stop calling me Gou!_ ”

* * *

Nagisa and Rei soon abandoned their quest of interrogating Haru. When he at last opened his mouth, it was to sample his lunch, and his lowerclassmen were obliged to follow suit, lest they squander their entire lunch break on futile pleas for information. They were not worried though, not yet: speculation was half the fun. It was, in fact, the only fun to be had, once they were told at the beginning of sixth period that they had been summoned to the Faculty Office after school. Rei was mortified, and even Nagisa admitted to some guilt and remorse, and so they went together… to face the trial on their own. Despite receiving proper summons, Haruka was nowhere to be seen.

“Come on!” the school counselor reprimanded them, his tone angry enough to make both lower their heads like sheepish children. “The place may be abandoned, but it’s still trespassing if you enter without permission! Do you understand?”

“We’re sorry,” mumbled Nagisa, keeping his eyes on the floor.

“Please accept our deepest apologies,” added Rei, performing a low bow.

The man sighed. There was a pause.

“Where’s Nanase?” he asked at last with a glance at the door.

“We don’t know, Sensei,” said Rei, straightening, but keeping his head inclined. “We last saw him at lunch break… he might have left early.”

“ _Again?_ ” groaned the counselor, but before he could continue, there was a sharp creak as Amakata-sensei rose from her chair, walking over to defend the absent.

“Now, now. I think that’s enough,” she said in a soft, cheerful lilt. “Think back to what Li Bai once said,” she continued, swishing a finger in the air. “ _In human life, accomplishment must bring total joy. Do not allow an empty goblet to face the moon._ ”

Rei might have felt embarrassed for his inability to place the quote, but Nagisa and the counselor looked just as confused as he was.

“ _You only have one life, so you should do what you want. It would be foolish not to drink from the glass placed before you_ … Right?” finished Amakata-sensei, who now looked around for their approval, but judging by their faces, the audience was simply not on the same wavelength. “...Huh? Why are you looking at me like that?”

The counselor coughed, clearing his throat loudly enough to dismiss even the immortal wisdom of Li Bai.

“Well, don’t let me catch you trespassing again!” he said to the boys. “Are we clear?”

“Yes,” replied Rei and Nagisa in unison, bowing again before they slipped out and left their superiors behind.

“Whew… that was close,” sighed Nagisa in the hall, where they leant against the wall and exchanged weary glances. “What now, Rei-chan? Do you wanna go home?”

“I suppose. Although…” said Rei, pushing up his glasses in deep thought. “Perhaps we could check one thing before we go, Nagisa-kun.”

* * *

Within five minutes, Nagisa and Rei reached the school locker room, where they began combing row after row of locker doors to check the metal name tags upon each door.

“Matsuoka Rin, Matsuoka Rin...” Nagisa muttered to himself as he paced down an aisle of lockers while Rei searched the row next to him. “Do you really think he might go to our school?”

“If Rin-senpai’s back from Australia, there may be reason to suppose he had transferred into our school,” replied Rei, keeping his eyes on the lockers.

“But I didn’t see him at the opening ceremony…” mused Nagisa, unheard by his friend, who was too busy reading the names aloud in his mind.

_Manjoume… Marufuji… Matsuo—_

“I found him!” cried Rei in triumph.

“Really?!” replied Nagisa, hurrying over to the aisle. Rei turned back to the name plate again.

“…Oh. No, wait... Matsuoka.. Gou?” he read the plate, his brow creased in thought. “That sounds familiar somehow...” he said at last, but no helpful memories presented themselves. As for Nagisa, he was in such a hurry the other day that he failed to notice the student he had collided with on his way to Haruka’s building, but luckily for him, Rei’s thoughts soon clicked to a little girl with a large paper bag, holding an empty cookie tin.

“Ah! I remember now!” Rei cried in joy. “She must be Rin-senpai’s younger sister, Matsuoka Gou-san!”

“Gou-chan goes to Iwatobi? We should tell Haru-chan!” said Nagisa, now grinning from ear to ear.

“I suppose a visit to Haruka-senpai wouldn’t hurt…” concluded Rei, and the matter was decided.

* * *

Rei and Nagisa were right – Haru did leave early. He had made up his mind to hurry home long before Amakata-sensei told him he was expected at the Faculty Office, so he nodded in agreement not to raise suspicion that he hadn’t the slightest intention to go. In a way, he was nearly glad for it: the summons served as an excellent ruse, just the thing he needed to ward off Tachibana. As soon as sixth period was over and the guy turned to him expectantly, Haru could stare him down and say without any remorse or discomfort,

“I have to go.”

“So I’ve heard,” replied Tachibana, his tone soft and his face even softer with something akin to pity. “Are you in trouble, Nanase-kun?”

“Not really,” said Haru, pulling his backpack over his shoulder as he passed the guy’s desk.

“See you tomorrow..!”

“Bye.”

_Annoying busybody_ , thought Haruka once he was out the door. The way Tachibana could feign concern was driving him up the wall and down the road with lightning speed, a million questions chasing him to his house two stone steps at a time. Why did Tachibana even bother? Was he after something? That seemed like the only plausible reason for pursuing someone who shook him off at every turn, someone who was _always like this_. The expression drew a bitter frown across Haruka’s face, all the more so because just like his conclusions, it could not be refuted. Tachibana definitely wanted something from him. To suppose otherwise… _No._ Haru locked the door, stripped off in seconds, and soon sank into the bathtub in his swimsuit, leaving his troubled heart to the water.

He sat there for a long time, but the only suggestion he could gauge from the silence was that he had to pay back Tachibana for his favor as soon as possible. If the guy accepted, all obligations would cease, and were he to decline in any shape or form, Haru would finally be able to call him out on his obvious mind games.

Just as he settled on this plan, the bell rang twice in rapid succession. Haruka frowned deeply at the alarming thought of visitors, but decided to remain where he was. His parents would have announced their arrival well in advance, and unless there was a call citing him to the door, Haru would answer to no one. Just to be safe, though, he took a deep breath and plunged under the water to hear no evil. _There._

His visitor kept pressing the button and peering up at the windows, but the dead silence that screamed behind each empty ring of the bell discouraged her soon enough. She hung her head and turned to leave, but found her path was blocked. It was Nagisa and Rei. The latter cleared his throat.

“Matsuoka Gou-san?”

“No,” replied the girl. Rei blinked. Nagisa quirked his brow.

“Oh… aaah.. we must have been mistaken,” mumbled Rei with sheepish looks. “I’m sorry—”

“It’s _Kou._ Not Gou – _Kou,_ ” said Matsuoka Kou. “Get it right, _Rei-kun_.”

“But your name is Gou, no?” said Nagisa. “Gou, like the Sengoku warlord Azai Nagamasa’s third daughter, right?”

“Yes, it is,” replied Kou, shooting him a glare, “But the typical reading is _Kou_ , so call me that like everybody else. That would be the nice thing to do.”

“We are sorry…” said Rei, nudging Nagisa in the side. “…Matsuoka Kou-san.”

At such a handsome apology, Kou flashed him a smile as sweet as her irritation had been bitter. Rei scratched his cheek with a finger. The younger Matsuoka was just as lovely, perhaps even more becoming now than he remembered her from their elementary school days, when she wore cheerful overalls, and Rin told him and Nagisa to think twice before ogling her if they valued their young lives.

“Kou-chan, then!” declared Nagisa, grinning from ear to ear. “So you’re attending Iwatobi High School now?”

“Yeah,” said Kou with a smile, obviously glad things seemed to go her way for once.

“Welcome to Iwatobi High School, Kou-san,” said Rei, giving her a smart bow. “But tell us, what brings you to Haruka-senpai’s house?”

“Oh—” blurted Kou as she averted her eyes. It was her turn to look sheepish and fumble for words. “I just wanted to ask him about my brother…”

Rei and Nagisa exchanged glances.

“So Rin-chan really _is_ back from Australia,” said Nagisa. Kou hung her head with a nod.

“He returned last month and he’s attending Samezuka Academy now,” she explained, her voice small. “It’s a boarding school, so he hasn’t even come home yet.”

“Samezuka Academy?” asked Rei, his eyes widening in awe. “The fabled swimming powerhouse…?”

“That’s right. I figured he must have wanted to eventually enter tournaments and swim with Nanase-san again.”

“But Haru-chan doesn’t swim in tournaments anymore,” chimed in Nagisa. Kou squeaked.

“Eh?! But I thought Nanase-san was a swimming prodigy? Onii-chan wouldn’t stop talking about how fast he was!”

“We are not sure what happened,” said Rei, “but it appears Haruka-senpai really had stopped swimming competitively. He said so himself.”

Kou peered up at the house in defeat.

“I guess there’s no point then,” she said, her voice low again. “I had better go.”

“Is he not home, then?” asked Nagisa.

“I rang the doorbell five times. Nobody answered.”

“I suppose Haruka-senpai isn’t keen on unexpected visitors…”

“Maybe he’s on the toilet,” suggested Nagisa. Kou made a face. “Call him on the phone, Rei-chan, tell him Kou-chan wants to see him!”

“No-no-no, that’s okay!” cried Kou, now raising her hands in protest. “I’m sure I can talk to him some other time! I’ve got to go now!” she said as she tore past them, her schoolbag thumping on her back. “Goodbye Rei-kun, Nagisa-kun!”

Rei stared after her until she disappeared down the stone steps, slowly shaking his head.

“I do believe you scared her away, Nagisa-kun..”

Nagisa shrugged and turned back to Rei.

“I was serious, though. Call Haru-chan, I bet he’s just stewing inside again.”

Since the idea seemed too plausible to discredit, Rei took out his phone with a sigh to dial Haruka’s number, putting his contact information to better use than he had for the past two years.


	5. EPISODE 1: Reunion at the Starting Block! - Part 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nagisa’s theory proved correct. Haru had since come to the surface for air and leant against the back of the tub, assuming his visitor had gone away. However, before his nails could truly turn reminiscent of the patterns on his swimsuit, the phone started drumming on the edge of the sink. Before it could vibrate itself to its doom, Haru begrudgingly picked it up.

_Haruka-senpai? It’s Rei. Please come down for a minute, Haruka-senpai._

“…Okay.”

A minute later, Haru opened the door in nothing but his swimsuit and a towel over his head, his body conspicuously wet. Nagisa blinked. Rei’s face twitched.

“Did we interrupt something, Haruka-senpai..?”

“Yeah,” said Haru with a sharp glare. “What do you want?”

Nagisa took a deep breath.

“Haru-chan, you’re never gonna believe this—”

“Then don’t tell me.”

“—but Rin-chan really _is_ back in Japan!”

Haru’s eyes narrowed. He reached up to rub his hair dry with the towel, no longer looking at the others.

“And that’s not all, Haru-chan! Rin-chan’s sister Gou-chan—”

“It’s _Kou-chan_ —san, Nagisa-kun..”

“Right, right, _Kou_ -chan now goes to Iwatobi High School!”

Haru paused for a moment. _That’s right_ , Rin did have a sister, just one year younger. Now that he thought about it, all of them had at least one sibling except for him, as though he had been destined to solitude from the very start. Even Tachibana was an older brother to a pair of twins…

“She came here earlier to see you about her brother,” Rei carried on in Nagisa’s stead. “She told us that Rin-senpai enrolled in Samezuka Academy.”

“…And?” said Haru, his voice acrid. His late grandmother always did say that trouble never came alone. Within just a few minutes of listening to the excited chatter of his former teammates, who considered Rin’s return felicitous news, Tachibana was miraculously absolved of his sins, which now found their rightful place with Matsuoka Rin, the original bane of Haru’s existence. Blaming Rin was easier than his earlier attempts to find fault in soft and mellow Tachibana. Between the two of them, those sleepy green eyes were undoubtedly the lesser evil.

“Don’t you get it, Haru-chan?” said Nagisa, sounding more and more excited. “If we take the train, we can visit Samezuka Academy to see Rin-chan!”

“No.”

The reply was instant, and Haruka’s hand shifted to the door as though he were ready to pull it shut. Nagisa stared at him in disbelief.

“But Haruka-senpai.. don’t you wish to see Rin-senpai again?” asked Rei, just as surprised as Nagisa.

“We saw him yesterday,” replied Haru, his hand tightening on the handle.

“Aww, come on, Haru-chan…!” pleaded Nagisa. “Things turned out weird yesterday, but maybe he’s come around since then!”

“I’m not interested,” said Haru, the door slowly sliding shut. Nagisa yelped and grabbed onto it to keep it open as Rei racked his brain for incentives.

“But, but Haruka-senpai – Rin-senpai was our friend..!” he said at last, but the struggle for the door only worsened, and now threatened to end in broken fingers one way or another.

As a last resort, Rei let out a desperate war cry and shoved Nagisa aside to jam himself in the doorway. Haru glared daggers at him and let go of the door with one hand to start pushing at him with the other.

“Hear me out, Haruka..senpai!!” groaned Rei as Haruka’s hand pressed into his gut. “Samezuka.. Academy.. is a prestigious boarding school.. with its own.. swimming.. facilities…!”

“ _They have a pool!_ ” wailed Nagisa. “You can swim there if you _stop murdering Rei-chan!!_ ”

The next moment, Rei staggered backwards as the door rolled open again, nearly landing on top of Nagisa. Haru stared at them, the arm that had been pushing at Rei hovering in the air for a moment before it fell softly to his side. Nagisa steadied Rei. They exchanged glances, then turned to Haruka again.

“If you come with us, Haruka-senpai, we’ll find a way to get you in,” said Rei, straightening his shirt that had bunched up in the scuffle.

“ _To the pool_ ,” stressed Haru, his eyes hard, but his earlier resolve obviously wavering. Nagisa cracked a smile.

“To the pool, Haru-chan.”

“You might want to get dressed first though, Haruka-senpai,” said Rei, eyeing Haru’s bare chest with disapproval. There was an annoyed huff, but Haru obediently retreated upstairs. Rei sighed in relief.

“You could use a change of clothes yourself, Rei-chan,” said Nagisa the moment Haru was gone, positively giggling.

“What are you talking about, Nagisa-k—AAAAAaaaaAAHH!!” howled Rei when he finally looked down. In an effort to drive him out, Haru apparently pressed against his trousers in all the wrong places for wet patches.

* * *

Haruka soon reappeared in his school uniform, arriving back to a giggly Nagisa and an embarrassed Rei holding Nagisa’s schoolbag in front of himself by its handle. Haru nearly asked, but stopped himself just in time. He probably didn’t want to know.

“Ready? Let’s go!” cheered Nagisa with his fist raised to the sky, and so they began their journey at a casual pace down the stone stairs and along the bay Haruka passed every day on his way to school.

It was a long walk, long enough to exhaust all attempts at small talk except for one thing: Nagisa asking _Who gave you that sandwich?_ in a myriad of creative variants at random intervals, hoping to catch Haruka off guard. He was out of luck, however. Haru kept his eyes on the road in stubborn silence, his jaws clenched so firmly he might have had difficulty opening his mouth even if he had begun to slip. Why they were so hung up on knowing who it was, he couldn’t imagine. And what did they expect to hear exactly, just two days into the trimester? He hardly knew anything about the guy except for what the girls managed to get out of him between classes…

_Tachibana Makoto, a guy with a girly name. Single. Scorpio. Sixteen years old. Older brother to twins Ran and Ren, both grade-schoolers. Lives in Iwatobi with his family. Olive green hair, bright green eyes, good-looking (perhaps), tall and well-built (if the fit of his uniform was anything to go by). Right-handed. Bad at English and art. Probably like sports. Also seems to like the color orange. Brings decent lunches. Meddlesome, smiles too much, talks even more, is generally the greatest nuisance_ … and Haruka had to stop himself from searching the bank of his memory even further. And what did the guy know about him in return?

_Nanase Haruka, a guy with a girly name. Unable to take care of himself. Eats mackerel. “Always like this.”_ Haru lowered his head, his gaze hardening. _Enough, already._

He managed to hold his tongue all the way to the train station, where they got into an empty coach and settled down on one of the benches, sitting close together. Tired from his unsuccessful attempts, Nagisa slumped against Rei, nestling to his friend’s shoulder until he found his usual spot. Rei sighed, but said nothing and closed his eyes, the two soon fast asleep, Rei snoring just loudly enough to annoy Haru into scooting away.

Having no one to keep him company anymore, Haruka watched them for a while, his gaze lingering on the rhythmic rise and fall of their chests, their softened expressions, and the way Nagisa drooled in his slumber, leaving a damp patch on Rei’s jacket. No amount of clacking wheels or sudden jolts of the train could disturb them. Indeed, the more Haruka stared at them, the more he began to imagine _himself_ uncomfortable, as though sitting freely with no one to weigh him down or slobber all over his clothes could no longer compare to their mutual accomplishment of lulling each other into blissful sleep, leaving Haruka to his thoughts and the resonant silence of the coach. The emptiness inside him screeched and Haru turned his head to the window, his light-washed reflection staring back at him for the rest of the trip.

* * *

Samezuka Academy boasted a handsome green campus, and a large indoor pool with every conceivable convenience known to swimmers. So close to evening, approaching this otherwise private world proved fairly easy, with hardly anyone around to notice or question the boys’ brown trousers and gray jackets emblazoned with the large blue coat-of-arms of Iwatobi High School. Nagisa and Rei crept along the wall by the barred windows of the indoor pool, keeping their heads down not to be spotted. There were over a dozen students inside, caught in a vigorous training session (“Hey! You’re slowing down, Nakagawa! Move!”), which thankfully rendered them blind to outsiders. Nagisa and Rei set up camp by the window, then peeked inside again in search of their friend.

“Do you see Rin-chan?” whispered Nagisa.

“I can’t see him anywhere… perhaps his training session is at another time,” said Rei, sounding disappointed. “I suppose we’ll have to wait until everybody finishes. Haruka-senpai—” he continued, turning his head back, then nearly screamed as he caught Haru undressing behind them. Just as he was about to loosen his pants, Rei let out a strangled cry and jumped at him, grabbing the hem of his trousers to yank them back up. “Haruka-senpai, _stop!_ ”

“You said that if I came here, I could swim in the pool!” snapped Haru, suddenly fierce and animate. Nagisa scrambled between them, pushing the two backwards.

“Now, now, Haru-chan,” he said, his voice gentle. “Let’s wait until practice is over and everyone’s gone. Okay?”

Haru glared, but said no more. Rei twitched nervously.

“This is so wrong,” he breathed, releasing Haruka’s trousers to fumble nervously with his tie. “I can’t believe we’re trespassing again… what will become of my flawless record..!”

“It’ll be _fine,_ Rei-chan,” Nagisa hushed him with a reassuring smile. “Besides, that teacher earlier told us to do whatever we wanted with our lives—”

There was a soft rustle of fabric behind them, and the metallic click of a belt as Haruka removed his trousers for good, revealing what appeared to be his last swimsuit or one just like it.

“ _Can’t it wait, Haruka-senpai?!_ ” shrieked Rei in earnest, no longer caring who heard him.

He received no reply.

* * *

Haruka’s primordial urges and the dissonant growls of their stomachs stretched the wait to excruciating lengths. All they had between them was a bag of candy Nagisa had stuffed into his bag that morning, but as neither Haruka nor Rei were keen on sweets, all of it disappeared without their help, one piece at a time. The bag would have been gone sooner had Nagisa given up on his quest to interrogate Haru, but while there was time to kill, he was at his leisure to think up a few more variations of _Who’s your new friend?_ between bites of candy, and otherwise calm and sensible Rei actually encouraged him, burning inside with curiosity that their long and fruitless speculations had only made worse.

“Just tell us one thing, Haru-chan: is it a boy or a girl?”

“Honestly, Haruka-senpai, what is there to hide about your relationship?”

“Come on, Haru-chan!”

“They are not my friend!” snapped Haru, refusing to give them the satisfaction of even knowing what sort of person to imagine. He could have accomplished the same thing by just saying, _Their name is Makoto_ , but something inside him advised against it, and Haru decided to listen.

“We could always come and visit you in class, you know…” mused Nagisa, raising one finger to his chin. “Maybe then—”

“I forbid it.”

“But, Haruka-senpai—”

“ _Just leave it._ ”

* * *

Nagisa and Rei respected Haruka’s wishes for the present, waiting with threadbare patience for Samezuka’s swim club practice to end. Even once everyone had left the indoor pool, it seemed wise to lay low for just ten minutes longer, until the entire campus fell into stale, empty silence. Soon there was nothing to hear, not even bird song, and that was the moment they took their chance, sneaking to the door and slipping inside.

The structure stretched for miles and the pool seemed enormous: the moment they had stepped within ten feet of the blocks, it ensnared Haru completely. He shed his clothes within five seconds and dove in within three more, ignoring Rei’s cries to slow down. _What for?_ He could hardly wait any longer, and there, in the moonlit ripples of that vast body of water, he found peace again. Once he started swimming, even Nagisa and Rei watched tongue-tied as Haruka’s slender form slithered away like a serpent, their hearts beating just a little faster.

“I get the feeling we shouldn’t be here,” said Rei, his voice quivering, “but watching Haruka-senpai swim so gracefully… ahh. His swimming is still as beautiful as ever.”

Nagisa sighed in awe, his eyes gleaming in the pale light.

“Haru-chan still reminds me of a dolphin,” he said at last, his heart fluttering with the happy memories of an eleven-year-old long gone, until his smile widened in mischief. “Rei-chan, let’s swim with him!”

“What?!” cried Rei, his hair standing on end. “Forget it, Nagisa-kun! We’ll get in trouble if anyone finds us using another school’s pool without permission! Besides, we came to look for Rin-senpai, remember?” he went on as Nagisa undressed, loosening his tie and stripping off his vest and shirt in one go.

“We can take a little dip first,” replied Nagisa, his hands now fiddling with his belt buckle. “Nobody will find us if we don’t turn on the lights.”

“But neither of us have brought a swimsuit, Nagisa-kun..”

“A little skinny dip, then,” said Nagisa cheerfully, tossing his pants and underwear aside. Rei’s hands smacked on his burning cheeks with an indignant choking sound.

“What are you doing?! Put your clothes back on _this instant!_ ” he howled, but it was too late. Nagisa made a dash towards the edge and hurled himself into the air.

“ _I can swim!_ ” he cried triumphantly, landing butt-first with a roaring _SPLASH!_ Rei could feel a headache coming on just looking at the water.

“Rei-chan.. come over here,” cooed Nagisa when he resurfaced. Rei tensed his shoulders.

“You’re not going to pull a fast one on me, Nagisa-kun,” he said as he approached the edge and stopped just short of it, settling down at a safe distance. “Have you forgotten that I wear glasses? I’m not going to jeopardize my prescription lenses just to play your childish games!”

Nagisa continued to linger nearby, looking a little miffed that his fun was spoiled. He slowly turned his back as though he were going to swim towards Haru, then spun around and splashed some water in Rei’s direction, caring little if he hit or missed.

“AAAAHH!”

Target hit. Nagisa only managed to get some on Rei’s arm and hair, but the ultimatum was duly acknowledged, as Rei dragged himself closer to the edge to smack into the water and return the favor with a splash of his own.

“Take that, Nagisa-kun!”

Nagisa laughed, loud and free and bubbly, soon caught in an intense splash war with Rei, who might not have gotten into the water, but was soon soaked all the way to his trousers regardless. “Take _that!_ ”

“Take that—”

The door slammed shut behind them. Rei squeaked and rolled away from the edge to face the visitor. In the pool, Nagisa’s arm twitched upward and went limp mid-attack. Even Haru seemed to have stopped swimming, the water now as still as though no life floated within. It was Rin, this time in a white winter uniform that was still no match for the cold glint of his eyes. He approached Rei and Nagisa with thundering steps, stopping a few feet away to glare at them.

“Rin-senpai…” whispered Rei, heartily ashamed of his soaked uniform and dripping hair.

“What are you guys doing here?” demanded Rin, his eyes darting from one to the other. Rei scampered to his feet and brushed himself off in a futile attempt to salvage his wet clothes, while Nagisa raised a tentative hand to wave hello.

“Rin-chan..! We came here to see you,” he said, trying for a light tone.

“ _Get out!_ ”

“Rin-senpai...” mumbled Rei, shooting Nagisa a worried look… and then he saw it. Haru had since made his way surreptitiously towards them and slipped past Nagisa under the water, rising to the surface opposite from where Rin was standing. His hair clung to his scalp like a slick helmet, covering his eyes.

“Free...” he said, his voice low, yet ringing all too clear in the dead silence. Rin flinched.

“ _Huh?_ ”

“Did you forget?” said Haru, eyes still searching the depths of the pool for strength. “I told you I only swim free.”

“Haru-chan?” spoke Nagisa, now worried in earnest.

“Haruka-senpai…” breathed Rei. The next moment brought Haru to the edge, rising over it as he climbed out of the pool, the water running down his back in glistening cascades. _About three years until I’m ordinary_ , he thought to himself. _I guess it couldn’t hurt to wait a little longer._ He shook his head and his locks parted, revealing a pair of stormy blue eyes.

“I want you to show me that sight again,” he said, trying and failing to match that challenging tone to an equally challenging smirk. “I’ve since forgotten what I saw.”

Rin reeled backwards in slow-burning anger, but his features soon smoothed out as he closed his eyes, shutting out the sight of those blue eyes boring so archly into his.

“Sure, I can do that,” he said evenly, his own smirk razor sharp. “But it won’t be the same this time! I’ll be showing you something completely different,” he promised, glaring daggers at Haruka. The two now faced each other, their bodies tense… and this time, there was nothing to stand in their way.

 

**_TO BE CONTINUED…_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 


	6. EPISODE 2: Memories in the Distance! - Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once Nagisa clambered out of the pool, to be ushered back to his pile of clothes by an anxious Rei, Rin abandoned his winter uniform for the same legskin he had worn at the Swimming Club so he and Haru could proceed onto the two starting blocks in the middle. Their friends soon joined them on the side, Nagisa finally in trousers, and Rei’s shirt unbuttoned not to cling so persistently to his skin.

“As always, I can’t make any sense of you,” said Rin with a wry smile as he snapped his goggles into place. Haruka shrugged.

“Whatever,” he replied, bracing himself with hardened features. “You’d better get ready, Rin.”

Rin frowned, but quickly found his smirk again just to spite the other.

“And you’re as icy as ever,” he replied calmly, but his serene mask soon slipped to reveal a row of jagged teeth. “Yeah… You really piss me off.”

Haru pretended not to hear him.

“Rei,” he said, turning his head to the others. Rei twitched and straightened.

“Y-Yes!”

“Give us the start signal,” said Haru, fixing his eyes on the pool again.

“Alright, Haruka-senpai,” replied Rei, his shoulders tense as he watched them bend down and assume their positions on the blocks.

“We’ll race one-hundred meters, freestyle,” announced Rin. Rei took a deep breath.

“Ready… Set… _Go!_ ”

They launched into the air like panthers pouncing on prey, bursting through the glassy surface of the water with their claws and fangs bared.

“Oh wow!” cried Nagisa when he realized the difference between their landing points. “Rin-chan has a stronger kick!”

“That may be, Nagisa-kun, but Haruka-senpai’s stroke seems faster!” said Rei, his voice growing louder as the excitement of the race consumed him. “He’s doing great so far..!”

“Yeah,” breathed Nagisa, his face stiffening in concentration. “He’s nearly caught up now!”

Haruka’s arms continued to swing furiously towards his freedom. He was gaining speed even as Nagisa spoke, threatening to pull into the lead.

 _Damn! I can’t shake him!_ the thought raced through Rin’s mind, his arms whirling in desperation not to be left behind again.

“They’re making the final turn!” cried Rei as Haru and Rin broke into a tumble on the other side. Their feet connected with the wall.

“Who hit first?!” cried Nagisa.

“Too close to tell!”

The two swimmers launched forward like missiles, speeding towards the other end.

“They’re neck and neck!” wailed Nagisa wide-eyed.

“No, Nagisa-kun,” spoke Rei in a strained tone. “Rin-senpai’s kick was more powerful and put him in the lead!”

Rin was pulling further ahead with every stroke, tauntingly close, yet always just out of Haruka’s reach. Haru pursued him relentlessly, as though every atom of his body had honed onto Rin like a living compass. Pure adrenaline rushed through him with electric jolts, until Rin became no more than a pulse, a thought, _a feeling_ as the moment swallowed them whole… and as Haru rode on the waves of his momentum, his mind grew absolutely clear.

 _I’ve seen this before. This sensation…_ he thought as he floated forward. _I get it now. This is what I wanted. I don’t want to rely on or work with other people… I just want to drift through the water alone, in silence._

Within seconds, their hands smacked against the wall beneath the starting blocks. There was a difference.

“Haru-chan!” “Haruka-senpai!” cried Rei and Nagisa as they hurried over to their friend. Haruka emerged without a sound. In the next lane, Rin pulled off his cap and brought it down onto the water with a thundering splash.

“ _Yes!_ ” he cried, his grin feral and wide, while Haru was still catching his breath, his eyes resting on the water. When the tremors of his chest finally died down, he closed his eyes, hoping the shake of his hands would not spread to his arms. Not now. Not in front of everyone.

“You win,” he said quietly, lifting his head as he turned to the other. “That’s great, Rin.”

He expected Rin to gloat or jeer at him, and was perfectly ready to accept it. Anything was better than tears and hurt, even the reaction that did come instead of what had been, and what could have been.

“ _That’s great?_ ” hissed Rin, his face contorting in fury. The next moment, his hand shot forward and seized Haruka by the goggles hanging from his neck, yanking him over in a stranglehold, but Haru offered no explanation. His face was blank and distant, his mind withdrawn behind some invisible wall of _Do what you will, it doesn’t matter anymore._ Rin’s fist tightened on the goggle straps. Haru closed his eyes.

“HEY!” shouted someone behind them. Rin twitched as he recognized the PE instructor of Samezuka Academy and released Haruka, diving back into the water to slither away, as though he wanted nothing to do with the others anymore.

* * *

Rin was still awake when the digital alarm clock on his nightstand ticked silently and 2.20 turned 2.21, lying on his back and staring at the bottom of the bunk above his bed. His phone rested just inches away from his head, quite forgotten until its screen lit up and it started vibrating against the sheets. Rin untucked a hand from behind his head and reached for it, to find a message from his sister.

_From: Matsuoka Gou_

_Subject: –_

_Did you get to see Nanase-san and the others?_

“Damn it!” growled Rin as he hurled the phone at the other end of the bed unanswered, his insides twisting with the realization that he mindlessly sought out Nanase at the slightest suggestion from his meddling sister. He told himself a million times he did not care, that nobody was worth his time, so what was this if not foolish desperation, some childish yearning to prove himself right, only to fail every single time?

 _Does this mean I can never beat him?_ the thought mocked him, his fingers curling into claws in his hair.

Some distance away on that small hill overlooking the ocean, Haruka was awake too, soaking in a green tea bath for relief that would not come, for some peace of mind that constantly eluded him. He stared wistfully at the small, happy figurine of a dolphin on the bathroom counter, and on a whim, he gathered some water in his hands to squirt at it. His aim was as good as ever, the dolphin now dripping with green tea, yet it still continued to smile cheerfully into space and Haruka envied it, he envied it so much his heart sank like a rock. He sank with it until his head dropped softly against the back of the tub, wondering what he had done for his world to constantly fall off its hinges, forever spiraling out of his control.

* * *

The next day, Haruka took his seat by Tachibana’s side without a word, glaring into space as he waited for the arrival of his homeroom teacher for first period’s Classical Literature class, and the potential threat of another summons to the Faculty Office. He shut out the world so completely, he could no longer tell if Tachibana had said hello to him or not. He probably did. Too bad for him that Haruka didn’t care.

“Excuse me, Nanase-kun,” came Amakata Miho’s voice from above. Haruka lifted his eyes, to find her glowering right above him with a sharpness in her gaze that stood in stark contrast to the small smile etched onto her face. “You are expected at the Faculty Office after school today, and you would do well to show up this time instead of leaving me to stand in for you. Are we clear?” she finished with that same eerie smile. Haru tensed.

“Yes.”

“ _Wonderful._ I’ll see you there,” chirped Amakata-sensei, then left for the teacher’s desk at the front of the classroom without another word. Haru’s grasp on self-containment was now broken, and Tachibana’s voice finally reached beyond the barrier.

“You didn’t go to the Faculty Office yesterday…?” he mumbled, looking absolutely shocked. “But you even said you had to go..!”

Haru clenched his jaw as he turned to glare at Tachibana, who now seemed to alternate with Nagisa, Rei, and Rin in an endless loop of annoyance. His patience thoroughly abused, Haruka wanted nothing more than to stop the wheel, even if he had to break its weakest link.

“What do _you_ care? It’s none of your business,” he said, just barely keeping his voice to a whisper. Tachibana’s brow creased, his eyes wide and cloudy.

“You shouldn’t ignore a faculty summons like that, Nanase-kun, think of the consequences..! You could be expelled if you’re not careful,” he said, his argument so sensible it irritated Haru like a pesky itch he couldn’t scratch. “Promise me you’ll go to the Faculty Office after school today like Ama-chan-sensei told you to. Please, Nanase-kun..”

Haru’s eyes narrowed, and before he could reconsider, he blurted,

“If I promise to go, will you shut up and not talk to me again?”

Tachibana’s face darkened and Haru almost regretted he had spoken at all, but the other’s features soon smoothed out in calm resignation.

“Very well, Nanase-kun. I will not talk to you until tomorrow if you do as you were told.”

“Then it is time for you to stop,” replied Haru as he turned his head to the blackboard, away from his self-appointed obnoxious guardian. Tachibana opened his mouth to reply in the affirmative, but promptly stopped and turned away himself. His hands intertwined upon his desk, sitting perfectly still.

He was true to his word. For the rest of Classical Literature, he only spoke when answering Amakata-sensei’s questions regarding the poem she had read to them at the beginning of class, and the interpretations he offered seemed thoughtful and clever. He appeared the exact opposite of Haruka, who had always been good at the technical side of art but rather insensitive to abstract symbolism: perfectly able to read between the lines and uncover the poetic truth within, while his drawings from yesterday’s Art class looked as sketchy and crude as children’s doodles. Haru almost laughed when he saw how Tachibana failed to render a simple cube in graphite on paper. If that was the extent of his artistic talent at age sixteen, there was little hope of him catching up to the compulsory level any time soon.

Since he was in no more danger of conversation, Haruka allowed himself greater freedom in observing Tachibana, who had now become a curious object instead of an ever-bothersome subject. Haru would not look at him openly or study him at length, but a few short glances were enough to fill a few more blanks in his mental inventory of Tachibana’s mannerisms. He noted the way the guy scratched at the back of his head when he seemed nervous and the drooping arch of his back when he relaxed, or how he rolled his pen back and forth with a finger when his hand idled for longer than a few minutes. His hand was held lower when he was uncertain and higher when he was eager, but always to the side instead of vertically upward, and for better or worse, he engaged easily in conversation with anyone whose words seemed to invite collaboration. As much as Haru wished him completely silent, Tachibana still ended up talking to others a great deal, not once glancing over to him in vain, and Haru hardly knew why the idea bothered him, but it did.

Instead of leaving for lunch break and risking another encounter with Rei and Nagisa (whose questions about the “new friend” seemed incessant and vexed Haru to no end), Haruka stayed at his desk, enjoying the freedom of remaining where he had been sitting the entire day. Tachibana, however, gathered his bento and left at the earliest possible moment, without so much as a glance. _No doubt he went to talk other people’s ears off_ , thought Haruka, successfully fueling his own contentment over the arrangement he had unthinkingly yet so fortunately made. Not that Tachibana confirmed his suspicions: he returned as he had left, alone and without a sound. Perhaps he had grown less cheerful over the course of the day, but he could have just been tired. Haruka refused to feel even an ounce of guilt over the matter. All he has done was hold the guy to his word, nothing more, nothing less.

When sixth period ended and all his things had been packed, Haru rose from his seat, and a moment later, his neighbor did the same. Haruka ignored him and proceeded towards the classroom exit, but he soon became conscious of a second pair of footsteps echoing his as he walked down the corridor. He quickened his pace little by little and reached the Faculty Office in another minute, entering without so much as looking back. A few feet away, Tachibana lowered his head with a small, tired smile.

“Good luck, Nanase-kun,” he said quietly before turning back for his own backpack, soon passed in the hallway by a couple of recklessly running first-years. One of them bumped into him with a long string of painfully polite apologies. Tachibana shook his head, but he finally cracked a real smile as he resumed his walk back to class.

* * *

“Idiots! Do you actually feel bad about what you’ve done?!” shouted the faculty advisor as Rei and Nagisa lowered their heads and Haru continued to glare into space. “First you trespass in an abandoned building, and now you trespass in another school’s pool?!”

Haruka retained his stiff posture and silence, but the others bowed with a modest and univocal _We’re very sorry._ The advisor lifted a hand to his face.

“Honestly, we’re fortunate that they’ve agreed not to make a big deal of this.”

The neighboring chair creaked once more and Amakata Miho approached them just as she had done last time, armed with her brightest smile.

“Now, now. I think that’s enough,” she said in her usual sing-song tone. “There’s a famous saying that applies to this situation,” she continued, lifting her hand to her heart. “In Ancient China during the Shang Dynasty, Duke Tai of Qi would fish without any bait—”

“I hate fish,” interrupted the faculty advisor without the least bit of good humor in his tone or expression. Amakata-sensei stopped and quickly bowed her head.

“Excuse me..” she said in a small voice. Shortly thereafter, everyone was dismissed.

* * *

“Ama-chan-sensei wasn’t much help,” said Nagisa once they had been released from the Faculty Office. Rei hummed.

“I wonder how fishing without any bait even pertains to our situation,” he said as they headed down the hall. “I cannot follow Amakata-sensei’s thought process at all. What do you think she meant, Haruka-sen— Haruka-senpai..?” he stuttered, looking around.

“Haru-chan’s over there,” said Nagisa, pointing to a shrinking figure in the distance that quickly escaped before the torment of another interrogation could begin. Rei groaned, raking a hand through his hair.

“How does he move so fast…?” he mumbled, to be silenced the next moment by approaching footsteps.

“Ah, Gou-chan!” cried Nagisa.

“I told you to call me Kou!” snapped the newcomer.

“Nagisa-kun..!” chided Rei. Nagisa gulped and raised his hands in surrender.

“Now, now, it was just a slip of the tongue, Kou-chan,” he said with a nervous smile. Kou squinted at him but said no more, so the three of them headed back towards the first-year classrooms.

“So, were you able to see my brother?” asked Kou, as innocently as her conscience allowed.

“Yeah, about that… Rin-chan was so mean!” started Nagisa, glad someone finally asked. “We hadn’t seen each other in four years, and the first thing he does is challenge Haru-chan to a race! He completely ignored me and Rei-chan… We didn’t get a chance to talk about anything!” he finished, gesturing wildly in indignation.

“Has Rin-senpai spoken to you about the encounter, Kou-san?” asked Rei, his voice low. Kou shook her head almost apologetically.

“I’ve sent him e-mails and called his cell without any luck,” she explained, no longer looking at the others. “I even called his dorm number and nobody picked up.”

“How come Rin-chan’s changed so much?” asked Nagisa, following Kou’s eyes towards the window to a small stretch of bright blue sky. “Did something happen in Australia?”

“I don’t know. I was hoping he would open up after meeting you guys,” replied Kou. Rei’s eyes narrowed in thought. He adjusted his glasses.

“Kou-san.. Could it be that _you_ are responsible for Rin-senpai’s showing up at the Iwatobi Swimming Club?”

Now it was Kou who raised her hands in defense, her smile faltering.

“I wouldn’t say I was responsible…” she mumbled, her tone laced with sheepish guilt. “I was just trying to help. I happened to overhear your conversation the other day, so I sent him a message to tell him the swimming club he used to go to was going to be torn down… but he never replied,” she finished, hanging her head.

“Is that why you visited Haruka-senpai’s house yesterday?” asked Rei. Kou nodded.

“Yes. I was hoping he might have some answers…”

“I see,” replied Rei. They walked on in silence for a little while, until Nagisa decided to break the freshly formed ice.

“Don’t worry, Kou-chan,” he said, spurring himself to sound encouraging and cheerful. “Rin-chan may not have opened up so far, but that just means we need to meet him some more!”

“Nagisa-kun..?” spoke Kou, unsure where the conversation was headed.

“And I know just what we need to do to make sure we run into him again and again. Let’s start a swim club!”

“Nagisa-kun…?” Rei echoed Kou, his brows running all the way up his forehead.

“If we start a swim club, we can see Rin-chan at tournaments,” explained Nagisa, absolutely thrilled with his brilliant plan. “We will swim together again, it’ll be just like old times!”

“There is just one problem, Nagisa-kun,” mumbled Rei, pushing up his glasses again. “I’m not sure how we are going to convince Haruka-senpai to join.”

“We can worry about that later. I’ll figure something out. You can count on us, Kou-chan!” replied Nagisa, his hands balling into fists in excitement. “Next stop, Haru-chan’s house!”

“Here we go again…” moaned Rei, who had the feeling it was either going to be a violent Blitzkrieg or a long, unpleasant afternoon.

* * *

Once again, they caught Haruka mid-bath, if his swimsuit-clad reverie in a tub full of water could even be called a proper bath. It took nine rings of the doorbell and a phone call to get him out of there, and just like last time, he showed up topless and dripping wet when he finally opened the door. Kou quickly hid behind the boys. Haruka only caught a glimpse of her red ponytail as it flipped upward and settled behind Rei’s taller, larger frame.

“Haru-chan, can we come in?” Nagisa greeted him all smiles. Haru’s gaze was deadpan.

“How about no?”

“Aww, come on, Haru-chan..! We even brought you a visitor,” continued Nagisa as stepped to the side to leave an opening. A moment later, an embarrassed Kou emerged between him and Rei, her hands covering her eyes.

 _No! Don’t look! Girls my age shouldn’t ogle naked men!_ _Must… not… look…_ her inner voice pleaded her even as she first lowered her hand nervously, then slowly yielded to curiosity. Haru stood in the doorway with his right hand on his hip, his muscles in pleasing relief. Kou’s eyes widened. _What incredible biceps…!_

“This is Rin-chan’s sister,” explained Nagisa. Kou blinked, her cheeks uncomfortably warm.

“H-Hello,” she said with a bow of her head. “It’s been a long time.”

“Matsuoka…” spoke Haru as he tried to recollect her. She braced herself for the inevitable. “…Kou.”

Kou drew a relieved breath and flashed Haru her brightest smile.

“Yes!” she replied with a slight tilt of her head, the way Tachibana did when he smiled. Haru bit his lip. “I’m sorry about what my brother did yesterday.”

“Don’t sweat it,” he replied, still not moving from the doorway.

“Haru-chan, we need to talk,” said Nagisa, tapping his foot impatiently. “Let us in, alright?”

Haru narrowed his eyes, but felt too tired to protest. He scooted to the side and the others headed in, Nagisa leading them in single file to the living room.

“Ah, where are the pillows again?”

“I think they were in the bottom cabinet last time, Nagisa-kun…”

Haru made a face behind them, but proceeded to the kitchen to make tea, the only thing he was willing to offer to uninvited guests.

“Do you need a hand, Haru-chan?” offered Nagisa, then promptly headed into the kitchen while Rei pulled out more pillows for Kou and himself, settling down as the others busied themselves a few feet away. Kou had never visited Haruka’s house before and was examining the decor with a confused look. From Onii-chan’s exultant stories of “Nanase,” she expected a dozen splendid trophies, but not even a single medal adorned the shelves, and she wasn’t the only one surprised.

“Haruka-senpai,” began Rei, his tone tentative, “did you manage to take the trophy home safely?”

“I did,” came the curt reply. Rei sighed, his glance flitting to Kou, who stood up to study the various bowls on the shelves, but was now holding a photograph that she found lying among them, half caught under a vase. Rei rose to his feet to join her. It was an old copy of the picture they saw at the abandoned Iwatobi Swimming Club: the four of them standing side by side as Rin held the trophy they had won together.

“Isn’t this…” spoke Kou, eyeing those small faces carefully. Rei smiled.

“That’s right, it is from the day the four of us won the relay,” he said, beaming with pride despite the soft pang he felt as his finger traced the trophy in young Matsuoka Rin’s hands. “On the day you overheard us, we went to the old Iwatobi Swimming Club to search for this trophy, but Rin-senpai must have anticipated us. He didn’t want the trophy, however, so we gave it to Haruka-senpai for safe keeping. …I guess it’s in another part of the house,” he added with an apologetic smile. Kou lowered her eyes to those young, small faces again.

“Everyone’s smiling…”

“Everyone except Haruka-senpai. To this day I cannot imagine what he was looking at,” said Rei as they stared at that small figure with his head turned to the side.

“It’s okay, Haru-chan is always smiling on the inside,” interrupted Nagisa when he brought in their tea. His tone and looks made Kou giggle.

“You make him sound like a bad person!” she whispered and Haruka did his best to ignore the laughter that followed, tidying up in the kitchen to gain more time away from their loud banter. With Nagisa joining the others in the living room, the photograph passed over to him.

“We have grown a lot since,” he said, grinning at his younger self.

“Rin-senpai especially…” mused Rei, recalling how dense and rugged Rin looked without his clothes. When he compared the two, Haruka seemed to resemble Nagisa’s thin frame more than Rin’s muscular chest and chiseled abdominals. “I do believe we haven’t seen him since the relay. Is this the first time he has come back to Japan since he had left for Australia, Kou-san?”

“Huh?” Kou stared at him in confusion. “He came back every year for New Year’s.”

“Really?!” cried Nagisa. “And he never told us…? That’s so mean. He could have called…”

A few feet away, Haruka winced. Nobody noticed.

“Haru-chaaan, hurry up before the tea gets cold!” came Nagisa’s absent-minded whine a moment later. Haruka sighed, wishing he could have been forgotten, but not wanting the others to come after him, he walked into the living room and stopped by the table, preferring to stand over them rather than sit down and join their circle. The others peered up at him expectantly. Haru slowly helped himself to the only unclaimed cup on the tray.

“Is this why you came?” he asked, nodding to the picture. “To stare at that thing?”

“N-No, Haruka-senpai,” replied Rei as he pushed his glasses back. “There is something Nagisa-kun wanted to say to you,” he continued, he and Kou now staring pointedly at Nagisa.

“That’s right,” said Nagisa, waving his hands sheepishly. “Haru-chan, we came to tell you that we are starting a swim club!”

“The three of you?” spoke Haruka, his brow quirked. Kou flushed.

“Close, but no trophy,” said Nagisa without missing a beat, grinning from ear to ear. “The three of _us_ , Haru-chan – me, you, and Rei-chan!”

“It’s not polite to put yourself forward, Nagisa-kun..” sighed Rei unheeded.

“Well, what do you say?” pressed Nagisa. Haru looked away.

“Why do I have to join?”

“Because you are the best swimmer we know, and it’s all to bring back old times!”

Haru seemed unconvinced, but he had paused to consider it, and that was encouragement enough for Nagisa.

“If you join, you can swim all you want, Haru-chan! What do you say to _that?_ ”

Haru’s eyes bore into the floor as his thoughts drifted back to the indoor pool at Samezuka Academy, the pool that made his bathtub seem like a lowly prison cell. He closed his eyes. Deep within him, the emptiness stirred, shaking at the memory of that strange, wonderful sensation of floating freely, away from everything and everyone. If he and the water could unite once and for all, perhaps people like Rin or Tachibana wouldn’t be able to get to him anymore. He would be… he could be…

“Whatever. Knock yourself out,” he said out loud, still not looking at any of them.

“Really?!” cried Nagisa in triumph. “ _YESSS!_ We’re good to go then! Ah, I’m so excited!”

Haru suppressed a sigh at such needless enthusiasm. He himself felt no anticipation, but apparently, it didn’t matter. Things would take their course, and so he resigned himself to floating along with the tide, if only because resisting it would have been too much effort.


	7. EPISODE 2: Memories in the Distance! - Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  
> 
> Another small edit. Enjoy!

At the end of their visit, Haru was persuaded to join Nagisa and Rei on the roof during next day’s lunch break, and since he was no longer safe from Tachibana, he had no objection to a legitimate excuse for leaving right after fifth period. Nagisa also extended the invitation to Kou, but she had already promised to eat with her friend Chigusa, and unsure yet of what her involvement might be from that point onward, she deemed it best to wait until further news of the swim club – not to mention that staying away afforded her the liberty of forming independent schemes of her own design.

Once they left, Haruka spent the rest of the day soaking in the tub and toiling with homework, more specifically with the extra study sheet Amakata-sensei handed to him after class, his punishment for getting into trouble twice in a row. Her questions regarding the once optional but now obligatory home reading seemed so without rhyme or reason that Haru caught himself wondering what Tachibana might say, immediately coloring at the idea that he couldn’t get either that guy or Rin out of his head. _Rin was all about this romantic nonsense back in grade school_ , thought Haru, and yet he now seemed as coarse as Tachibana’s amateur artwork. With neither inspiring any input, Haru found he simply had no sure answers to pretentious questions like what the swarm of yellow butterflies symbolized in the short story. Haru had never even seen a swarm in his life, and the only butterfly that immediately came to mind had little to do with the insect it was named after.

* * *

“Good morning, Nanase-kun,” Tachibana greeted him at school the next morning, his tone bright and warm as though yesterday’s cold exchange had never happened. Haru had to admire his tenacity. He himself would not have bothered with someone so vehemently protesting any attempt at conversation or friendship. Faced with that unaffected smile, he was forced to conclude with a sigh that Tachibana exceeded every expectation Haruka had formed of him except that of having good sense. He eventually nodded to the guy and sat down, strangely relieved Tachibana wasn’t sulking like Haru thought he might.

“Was everything okay at the Office yesterday…?” hazarded Tachibana. Haru closed his eyes, drawing a deep breath through his nose.

“It was fine.”

“You’re not in trouble anymore?” came the next question, the guy’s tone lightly teasing. Haru’s brow twitched. His breath escaped in an indignant huff.

“I am not.”

“That’s great. I’m glad,” said Tachibana, once again managing to sound like he genuinely cared about the well-being of a distant, unreceptive stranger. Haru gave him a hard glance, but the boys sitting beyond Tachibana snickered.

“Nanase found a nanny,” whispered one to the other and their laughter grew, obnoxious enough to warrant a sharp glare from Haruka. His eyes then shifted to Tachibana, wondering if the guy felt any shame over making himself such an easy target for scorn and ridicule, but Tachibana had since turned his head away to look at the culprits himself. Their laughter soon trailed off into uneasy silence. _Did Tachibana glare at them?_ Haru couldn’t tell. His posture seemed relaxed, his hands laying motionless on his desk, and try as Haru might, he could not imagine those upturned eyebrows and drooping eyelids capable of anything as hard as a glare. When the guy turned back towards the teacher’s desk at last, his face betrayed no anger or irritation beyond some lingering discomfort, no more than a slight downward curl of his mouth.

Haruka’s eyes fell, unable to do anything except ignore the tense atmosphere where the joke had died a horrible death. It was not resurrected again in Tachibana’s presence, but that one instance proved enough for him to lose confidence in engaging anyone afterwards, including Haruka. All he heard from Tachibana for the rest of the morning was a few straightforward answers to questions, and finally, at lunch break,

“Are you busy, Nanase-kun?”, spoken more quietly than his greeting had been.

“I need to go somewhere,” replied Haruka, staring at his desk.

“Ah,” came the calm reply. Haru lifted his eyes.

“To the roof. You can go anywhere else,” he added, and feeling uncomfortable enough, he stood stiffly and left with his lunchbox, followed by amused glances that broke into self-conscious desk-gazing once Tachibana raised and turned his head.

* * *

The others were already waiting for him, Nagisa bouncing on his heels as Haruka settled down by the wall and opened his lunchbox. In stark contrast to the others, his expression was damp, distant, and completely lost on his friends, to whom he appeared the same as always: ill humor eternal.

“Alright! Now that Haru-chan is here, I call this swim club meeting to order!” declared Nagisa, pulling his schoolbag closer to take out his pen pouch and some paper.

“We are not technically a swim club yet, Nagisa-kun,” risked Rei, only to have Nagisa shove some patterned document in his face. Nagisa waved it at Haruka next, his face practically glowing.

“Since everyone’s on board, I picked up a new club application form at the Faculty Office this morning,” he explained, followed by an awed glance from Rei.

“So that’s where you had gone after first period…” he breathed, and Nagisa confirmed with a nod.

“It’s important to get the ball rolling, so I thought, why wait? Now, let’s see.. the purpose of this club is… to train our minds and bodies through swimming, and improve the school experience!”

“I am impressed, Nagisa-kun,” said Rei, pushing up his glasses with a smile of approval. Nagisa giggled.

“There will be three members initially,” he carried on, checking the form. “Who should be the captain?”

“I think Haruka-senpai ought to be the captain,” suggested Rei. “He is the eldest.”

“This isn’t about age, Rei-chan. Either of you would be fine.”

They now looked over to Haruka, who had shown greater interest in his cold rice thus far than any part of the conversation unfolding around him. Rei cupped his chin, eyes narrowing as he imagined Haruka dressed in some bright, flashy uniform, barking orders to excited speedo-clad recruits. He let out a short, nervous laugh and draped a heavy hand over his face, glad neither of them could see the vaudevillian comedy unfolding inside his head.

“But if you insist, Haru-chan can be the captain and you can be the vice-captain,” suggested Nagisa, at which point Haruka finally graced them with his attention by shooting them a sour look.

“Hey, don’t just volunteer me like that,” he said stiffly. “I don’t want to be the captain.”

“Now, now, now,” Nagisa hushed him, his tone soothing. “It’s no big deal, Haru-chan! The captain is just a figure head, like most kings, for instance. Everybody knows it’s the vice-captain who does all the _really_ important work, so don’t worry!”

“I believe you have just insulted every king and captain on this planet _and_ relegated all duties and responsibility to me, Nagisa-kun…” huffed Rei, offended yet flattered at the same time at his semi-prestigious position. Haruka remained ambivalent about his, but as long as they expected nothing taxing of him, he felt he might as well accept the empty title that had been so decidedly bestowed on him.

“I’ll be the treasurer,” continued Nagisa, running his finger down the various rubrics that still needed to be filled, “which means that all we need now is a faculty advisor.”

“Any ideas, Nagisa-kun?” asked Rei, wondering if Nagisa had a plan.

“Hehe… I was thinking about asking Ama-chan,” replied Nagisa, already one step ahead of them. At his suggestion, even Haru stopped eating to stare, unsure if he liked the idea of Amakata Miho supervising him when he thought of that extra study sheet.

“Amakata-sensei…?” said Rei, thoroughly unconvinced. Nagisa gave him a mischievous look.

“I heard a crazy story from one of our classmates…”

“Oh, come now, Nagisa-kun, are you seriously giving credit to Nashimoto-kun’s stories? His grade average is appalling, and spreading rumors goes against my sense of beauty!” argued Rei, folding his hands over his chest. Nagisa let him finish, then flashed his friends a disarming smile.

“Well, there’s only one way to find out,” he said in a sweet tone, “unless you want me to try the counselor instead.”

There was nothing more to say. _Option A_ it was and so they headed down to the Faculty Office, where Amakata-sensei proved just as surprised as Haru and Rei had been.

“What? I can’t do it,” she said, looking rather confused at the strange request. “Sports aren’t my thing. I mean, I teach classical literature,” she explained with a smile.

“But I heard that until last year,” began Nagisa, “you had a job in Tokyo that involved swimsuits.”

The effect was immediate. Those once placid brown eyes suddenly turned alarmed and sharp as Amakata all but jumped up from her seat to hush him.

“Hey! Not so loud!” she whispered, her tone now strained and anxious. “Who’d you hear that from?”

“It was Nashimoto-kun from our class,” replied Nagisa, thoroughly glad for the convenient scapegoat. This gave Amakata-sensei pause, and sensible of their strategic gain, Rei quickly stepped in as Nagisa’s foil while Haru stood by the window some ways away, staring out at the sky.

“Amakata-sensei, does this mean that you were perhaps in the industry of swimsuit design?” he asked, trying to play the role of the impressed student. His delivery was not free of artifice, but Amakata Miho proved too nervous to notice.

“What? Y-Yes, you could say that…” she stammered in reply. Rei advanced.

“In that case,” he said, putting his hands together, “we would be thrilled to have you advise us about the technology that goes into competitive swimwear!”

“Huh..?!”

“Please advise us!” cried Rei, bowing reverently.

“Eh?!” squeaked Amakata-sensei as Nagisa quickly followed suit.

“ _Please!_ ” they pleaded aloud, drawing more and more curious glances until they successfully cornered their chosen candidate, who threw her hands into the air in defeat.

“If you really need me…” came her weary reply, met by exultant cheers as Haru continued to gaze out the window without a word, feeling little more than irritation. A large, majestic predator circled outside, mocking him with its victorious screeches as he stood there longing for water like birds longed for the open sky.

* * *

Haruka eventually returned to class, sufficiently glad they had managed to secure an advisor for their cause. The accomplishment even imbued him with enough patience to tolerate his classmates, until Tachibana’s arrival put a premature end to their open teasing. Tachibana said nothing and looked at no one as he sat down to gather his textbooks for the next class, but the more he seemed to shrink from attention, the more others stared at him as they chatted in hushed voices. It wasn’t hard to guess where their discourse tended, and Haru could not help but think that normally those same classmates would have come to talk to the guy as they had done before, but now they never will. Incredible as it seemed, Tachibana’s novelty and luck wore off as quickly as that. Nothing he did now could stop him from being shoe-horned into an invisible pigeon-hole as an officious mother hen, whose concern was ridiculous and whose well-meaning attentions were embarrassing and unwanted. _His fault for being meddlesome_ , Haruka told himself, only to be scolded by a prickling chill in his heart. Tachibana was new, and he had done nothing but show kindness to everyone from what Haru had overheard of his talking to others, asking questions and offering help that was politely thanked and turned down just as easily. Perhaps it was the curse of older brothers with younger siblings to take care of – perhaps it was the only form of care he knew. Haru turned his head to the window, finding it increasingly harder to look at him.

They both sat in silence from thereafter, and when school ended, it was Tachibana who stood first, his things already packed.

“Goodbye, everyone. Goodbye, Nanase-kun,” he said quietly, receiving only a few stray replies on his way out. The boys from earlier shook their heads after him with a laugh and Haru’s gaze slowly settled on them, his eyes hard as steel.

“What’s your problem?” he hissed, keeping his voice low. They stared at him, then looked at each another. One of them shrugged his shoulders.

“It was just a joke, Nanase. Testing his sense of humor, that’s all,” he replied. “Looks like he doesn’t have any.”

“He’s new. Give him a break,” said Haru, hardly knowing why this exchange was happening or why it mattered at all, and from the looks of it, neither did they.

“Hey, we don’t hate the guy, alright?” said the other now, throwing his hands in the air. “We just think it’s ridiculous how he’s fawning over you, I mean, talk about singling out the one guy that doesn’t care and making yourself look desperate.”

“Why don’t you tell him that _,_ then?” asked Haru, his tone icy. They glanced at each other, then turned back to Haruka, looking laughably shocked.

“Are you blind, Nanase? The guy’s _huge._ You don’t mess with that.”

“ _Then don’t,_ ” snapped Haruka, shoving his books inside his backpack and storming past them before they could object.

He didn’t see Tachibana anywhere on his way to the bicycle racks; the guy must have been long gone, though he had never left Haruka’s mind. As he rolled down the path by the bay and paddled towards the bottom of the stone stairs, Haru kept mulling over the events of the morning, and how his own thoughtless words might have shamed Tachibana and lessened his chances of being accepted by his classmates with greater readiness than they had shown today. At the same time, he realized with growing guilt that none of it made any sense. The guy was caring, responsible, and reliable almost to a fault. Wasn’t that what people always complained they wanted when surrounded by a sea of negligent, fickle, and superficial peers? Didn’t Haruka himself often get fed up when group assignments left him with all the work, when people forgot to return his pens, or compensate him for his help? And yet when someone finally came along, someone who would have been an excellent candidate for any assignment other than art or English, whose solicitude promised nothing but advantages, nobody jumped at the chance to secure Tachibana, least of all the person he was trying hardest to engage. _Unlucky, that’s what he is_ , thought Haruka: a bad judge of character who was now suffering for the poor choices he had made.

* * *

In the meantime, Kou had spent her lunch break very cheerfully, and since nobody needed her company or assistance at present, the time was ripe for some solitary investigations of her own. Like the boys’ ill-fated visit the other day, Kou’s adventure began with a long, boring train ride to Samezuka Academy, which she spent doing homework to get rid of any obligations that could be used against her by her brother.

The campus was vast and it took her a while to find the dorm complex, even with the help of eager high-schoolers, whose offers to take Kou on a scenic tour around the academy were met with polite but definite dismissal. The dorms were split into several blocks, so Kou consulted her mother’s handwritten notes to pick the right one, where the receptionist greeted her with a confused look at her unfamiliar school uniform.

“May I help you, young lady?” he asked when he looked up from his newspaper.

“Good day,” nodded Kou. “I’m Matsuoka Rin’s sister. I’m here to see my brother.”

The man shifted his newspaper to check the roster.

“Oh. Looks like Matsuoka-kun isn’t back yet.”

“Really..” said Kou, trying and failing to conceal her disappointment. The man paused.

“You may want to come back later or check the library. Most students spend their time at the library unless they have training.”

Kou thanked him and left the dorm, setting her sights on Samezuka’s indoor pool next. Unlike the undistinguished and easily mistaken dorm complexes, the large warehouse-like structure was fairly easy to find. She soon repeated her request at the main entrance and was directed to the lounge that ran parallel to the pool, separated by a wall inset with windows all the way down its impressive length.

“Excuse me…” she said quietly as she made her way past several students, her schoolbag held in front of her, then stopped as she took in the view and the view took _her_ in. Inside, dozens of scantily-clad young men were stretching for their warmups, while others stepped onto the blocks and dove in with majestic splashes: a cornucopia of Samezuka’s finest.

 _Incredible… Totally a prestigious school’s swimming club,_ she thought as her eyes widened and her free hand shot up to cover her face. _Traps and pecs everywhere! They’re gorgeous!_

“Hey, is it you?” came a voice from above. She blinked, turning her head to see another young man in Samezuka’s standard black sports uniform, his hair such a stunning autumn red it made his eyes seem yellow like a cat’s. “The one who’s looking for her big brother?”

“Oh! Yes,” replied Kou, and the guy gave her a good-natured smile that faded away the moment he looked at her more carefully.

“Hold on…” he began, his face alarmingly seriously. “You know.. You’re pretty cute,” he said at last, his cheeks lightly flushed. Kou allowed herself a small, relieved smile.

“Thank you. I’m looking for Matsuoka Rin, my brother.”

“Matsuoka?” came the confused reply. “There’s nobody named Matsuoka on the swim team.”

“Huh?” blurted Kou, completely frozen. Silence followed. The guy cleared his throat.

“Oh, how rude of me! I am the captain of the swim team, Mikoshiba Seijuurou. Pleased to meet you!” he introduced himself, reaching out a hand that Kou took without even realizing she had lifted hers to return the gesture. Seijuurou cupped and lightly squeezed her hand, releasing it a moment later with a smile. “I am in charge of every member here, and there’s nobody called Matsuoka on the team.”

“…I see,” said Kou and they stood silent for a moment, both immersed in thought.

“The name sounds familiar, though… Has your brother ever been to swim meets, by any chance?” asked Seijuurou, obviously trying to salvage the situation.

“Yes, while he was in grade school,” replied Kou, suddenly realizing she hadn’t seen Rin swim since the day she attended the relay with her mother and watched Onii-chan win that large, handsome trophy.

“I’ll make a note. New talent is always appreciated,” said Seijuurou. “Which dorm is he staying at?”

Kou checked her notes for the right building and dorm room. The captain hummed.

“He’s in a different building from those on the swim team, but that shouldn’t be a problem. I will find a way to talk to him later and personally invite him to join the team!”

He sounded so pleased with this plan, and grinned at her so warmly that Kou could feel her heart beat just a little faster, pulsing with hope. If the Captain of Samezuka Academy were to ask him directly, perhaps Onii-chan might join the swim team by the time Haruka-senpai and his friends started their own club. It was worth a shot, and Kou found herself smiling almost too sweetly at Mikoshiba.

“Thank you,” she said, her voice now sufficiently animated. Seijuurou looked delighted as he took her hand of his own accord this time, giving it a firm but gentle shake.

“You are welcome. Come back anytime!” he replied, letting go to clap his hands at the idle bystanders around them. “Alright! Those who are waiting to see me, come this way!” he barked, then waved goodbye to Kou, soon disappearing at the other end with half a dozen first-years in tow. One of them peered back at Kou as he followed the others. She didn’t notice.

* * *

“Is everyone sorted?” asked Captain Mikoshiba. The freshmen nodded, all of them now proud new members of the Samezuka swim team, or well on their way to becoming so. “Then just one more thing. Does anyone here know Matsuoka Rin?”

As the young lady appeared to be a first-year student and her brother had to be at least one year older, Mikoshiba entertained little hope of younger students knowing who he was, but after a moment of hesitation, one of the boys raised his hand, looking almost abashed at his own bravery. The pleasant surprise drew Seijuurou’s mouth into a hungry smirk.

“The rest of you are dismissed,” he said and the door soon closed, leaving him and his informant to themselves.

“First-year student Nitori Aiichiro…” spoke the captain as he looked up the name again from his list of pending recruits, where it had been affixed with a large, sweeping checkmark. “One of our newest members on the Samezuka swim team.”

“Yes,” came the modest reply as Nitori crossed his hands behind his back and straightened to make himself look more presentable, his heart beating fiercely under the standard Samezuka sports jacket. “I don’t know Matsuoka-senpai personally, but I’ve seen him compete before.”

“I see,” came the calm reply. Nitori’s teeth clamped down on his bottom lip, fervently hoping he hadn’t disappointed his captain on the very day he joined. He drew a deep breath, his eyes carefully seeking Mikoshiba’s.

“Captain Mikoshiba? Um, if I may…”

“Hm?”

“If I may say so, I find it very odd that Matsuoka-senpai isn’t on the Samezuka swim team. Senpai is an amazing swimmer..!”

“Is he…?” replied Seijuurou, scratching his chin as he tried and failed to jog his memory. Nitori nodded vehemently and the floodgates finally opened, a torrent of hopefully useful trivia pouring through the moment it was green-lighted.

“I participated in the tournament that I believe was Matsuoka-senpai’s last tournament as a grade-schooler,” he gushed, his face beaming with fond memories. “My team lost in the preliminaries, but I got to see Matsuoka-senpai win an amazing medley relay with team members Nanase Haruka, Hazuki Nagisa, and Ryuugazaki Rei, who all belonged to the same—”

“Hold up,” interrupted Seijuurou, cutting him off so sharply that Nitori let out a yelp. “Did you say _Nanase Haruka?_ ”

“Y-Yes, he was their freestyle—”

“I remember _him,_ ” said Seijuurou, furrowing his brow. “I had met him before at regionals myself.”

Nitori let out a shaky sigh, relieved he could supply his captain with valuable information after all. Seijuurou cracked a grin at him.

“Well then,” he said, rubbing his hands together, “I have an important job for you, Nitori.”

Nitori’s eyes grew wide, hardly daring to breathe lest he miss even one tiny detail.

“Since you know Matsuoka so well and you think he should be on this team, why don’t you persuade him to come to practice and see me?”

“M-Me? Persuade Matsuoka-senpai..? But I, he doesn’t really know who I am… and I’m just a simple freshman with no real accomplishments…” stammered Nitori as he lowered his eyes. The way he wrung his hands, however briefly, was not lost on Seijuurou.

“I’ll give you an incentive,” he said in a dangerously sweet tone, and Nitori’s eyes could not help but wander to his face at once, his mouth hanging slightly ajar. “If you convince Matsuoka to come to practice _even once_ so I could talk to him and have him join my team, I will personally make sure you get to share a room with your senpai at our very own swimmers-only dorm.”

Nitori gasped, coloring to the tips of his ears, first at the mere idea of being allowed to inhabit the same private space as his idol, then at himself for straightening and crying _Yes!_ without a moment’s hesitation, in what must have appeared desperation to someone who couldn’t possibly understand. Nitori quickly bowed and screwed his eyes shut in embarrassment, but no degrading comments or laughter came his way. Seijuurou merely said, his voice a content purr,

“You are dismissed.”

* * *

His first practice began ten minutes later, but once it was over, Nitori commenced _Operation: Persuade Senpai_ , putting on his best clothes to visit the dorm building where he had followed Rin from afar on the first day of the trimester, unable to believe his luck, and even less able to resist his curiosity. His palms were slick with sweat by the time he made it to the reception booth and knocked on the glass, forcing himself to look the receptionist in the eye.

“C-Captain Mikoshiba would like to speak to M-Matsuoka Rin..senpai…” he stammered to the man, who checked his roster as a mere formality before saying,

“Matsuoka Rin isn’t back yet. Do you want to leave him a message?”

“N-No— I mean, yes,” said Nitori, who received a torn-off notepaper and a pen. He scribbled furiously, but crossed it all out at the last moment, his cheeks flushed as he crumpled up the note, stuffed it into his pocket, then asked for a new slip. However, this one met the same fate as the first, until a few more slips later, the man slammed his entire notepad down in front of him in a way that clearly said, _You had better make the next one your last_. Nitori swallowed, his insides squirming like a pit of snakes. His final, thoroughly censored note simply said in painfully even handwriting,

_Please come to the indoor pool during practice hours at your earliest convenience and ask to see Captain Mikoshiba Seijuurou. Thank you. N.A._

* * *

It was just as well that Nitori had to settle for a message: had he decided to wait, he would have sat in the lobby for hours to no avail. Once evening came and darkness slowly spread across the sky, Rin was roaming the halls of the derelict Iwatobi Swimming Club once again, having come back for just one more thing to take. In the lounge where Nagisa had found their photograph, there was another picture sitting on the wall in its cracked, time-worn frame – another team of four boys with a trophy. The happiest and proudest of them had short reddish-brown hair, his face forever frozen in cheerful laughter. The more Rin stared at him, the more his eyes clouded until he closed them in shame, reaching out blindly to pluck the photograph off its nail. The frame was so badly damaged it gave way, snapping in two the moment he pried it open. The entire thing soon landed in the garbage bin in the corner, the photograph tucked carefully inside Rin’s pocket as his last memento of this accursed place.


	8. EPISODE 2: Memories in the Distance! - Part 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  
> 
> Another minor edit. Enjoy!

Just as Rin slipped away from Samezuka to haunt his old swimming club one last time, Haruka set out on a last-minute shopping trip to the nearest convenience store. As soon as he got home, he unloaded his groceries onto the kitchen counter, placing everything within easy reach. His afternoon bath had been spent in careful meditation over the events of the past few days, and just before dinner, it produced the stunning conclusion that the answer to all his problems was his _piéce de résistance_ , mackerel cooked in miso. His stomach concurred, and Haruka trusted his instincts. It would be the very thing he needed, precisely what he had been looking for.

First, he put the kettle on, then took out his bamboo drainer and a frying pan, placing two large fillets of mackerel into the drainer and chopping some fresh ginger as he waited for the water to boil. Once the kettle gave a cheerful whistle, its contents were poured over the fish, which was left to simmer while Haru heated up some water, soy sauce, mirin, cooking sake, and sugar in the pan, mixing slowly with a small whisk. His fillets were laid carefully into the broth, then covered with a lid to let the flavors deepen and allow Haru to prepare the miso, his face serene as he stirred it smooth and creamy. He had always found cooking soothing, almost therapeutic after a long day, and when he at last sampled what would be tonight’s dinner and tomorrow’s lunch, his lips twitched into a faint smile. Nevertheless, even such small pleasures disappeared a little too soon, when he thought of all the troubles these poor, innocent fillets were supposed to remedy.

 _One more day and this week will be over._ That was the promise that truly kept Haruka in tolerable spirits after five consecutive days of bad luck, starting on the very night he had excused himself from attending the opening ceremony just to avoid others for a little while longer. Oh, how naive he was in retrospect. His world had been under siege ever since by every single person around him: Nagisa, Rei, Rin, Kou… and Tachibana. Haru eventually slipped into bed for the night, but lay awake for an hour longer, his thoughts fluctuating between the five of them as the great kaleidoscope of his mind spun round and round, recycling the broken mosaics of his memory.

* * *

The next morning found Haruka in class earlier than anyone else, sitting at his desk perfectly still while his eyes roamed over gray-washed skies beyond the window. It was a moment of perfect serenity, obscenely rare and all the more appreciated for it, but peace at school was as fragile as time was inexorable in its eternal forward march. Haru had not been sitting for five minutes together when his classmates started drifting in one by one, the desks soon all occupied except for Tachibana’s. Haru’s eyes switched back and forth between the ownerless chair and the window as the minutes ticked away, occasionally shooting the jokers from yesterday an accusing glare that they returned with defensive shrugs of their shoulders.

Tachibana’s empty chair had drawn curious glances, but his conspicuous absence invited more teasing speculation than worries or inquiries. Haru turned his head away, glaring helplessly into space. Was the guy sensitive after all, sensible of the fact that others were making fun of him behind his back, and unable to face them because of it? Or was he sick? _..Did something happen to him?_ Class would start any minute now and Haruka felt strangely exposed in his corner seat, no longer shielded by the other’s larger frame. The irony of so often wishing Tachibana away, yet feeling almost uncomfortable the moment he went missing irked Haruka. The guy was unreliable after all, even if he proved predictable.

Class soon started, and they were well into discussing the second math problem on the blackboard when the door slid open and in burst Tachibana, completely out of breath and his backpack sagging from his shoulders. Haruka’s head whipped up the very second he heard the door. Their eyes met, staring at each other as Tachibana gasped for breath. The next moment, the teacher smacked the desk with his ruler and the guy flinched, turning around to bow and apologize.

“You are over ten minutes late! What is the meaning of this?!” demanded Nakano-sensei. Tachibana bowed his head even lower.

“I’m sorry, Sensei. I had to help my siblings, who go to a different school. I tried to hurry, but I wasn’t fast enough.. I apologize,” he said, his voice quiet and even.

“Sit down, Tachibana. Don’t let me catch you late again,” said Nakano-sensei in a sharp tone, pointedly turning away from the troublemaker to the still untangled math problem on the blackboard. Behind him, Tachibana sank into his seat, digging out his course book and pens to give as little cause for displeasure as possible. Once he finished unpacking, he willed himself into sitting perfectly still, so immersing himself in the role of the penitent, attentive student for the rest of class that he even failed to notice how Haruka glanced over to him again and again, just to make sure he was really there.

* * *

When the bell rang and class was dismissed, a student nearby turned towards Tachibana. As if on cue, some of the girls did, too.

“You had a good run this morning, Tachibana,” the guy teased him and the girls giggled. The addressee showed no sign of annoyance, but Haru’s features hardened instantly. “How old are your twins again?”

“Ten,” replied Tachibana. “They go to Iwatobi Elementary,” he added, either not bothering to correct the odd phrasing or not noticing it at all, but when the two students from yesterday picked up on its meaning and started snickering, his head turned towards them almost in slow motion, no longer smiling. Their laughter faltered, then broke up into tense silence as Tachibana leaned backwards and straightened his impressive shoulders, while Haru learned slightly forward, staring coldly and expectantly at the boys from behind Tachibana’s chest.

“Must be great kids,” said one of them with a nervous smile. Tachibana’s eyes narrowed.

“They are,” he said, his tone heavy and dark as he stared at them. Despite contributing little, Haru felt oddly satisfied when the boys turned their heads uncomfortably and eventually left for the hallway, while the student that started the teasing sank back into his chair. Even the girls stopped giggling, though their reasons seemed more ambivalent, as one of them now eyed Tachibana with what appeared to be a mixture of awe and approval. Nevertheless, showing steel had much the same effect as his showing kindness: everyone went back to minding their own business, paying no more attention to Tachibana.

Well, almost everyone, even though Tachibana was now undoubtedly there to stay, at least until lunch time, when he fished out his bento and left the classroom without a word. He did not so much as look back at Haruka, who tucked his own lunch bag under his arm a moment later, soon entering the hallway to go after him. Haru was directed towards the backyard with its artificial brook and silk-soft grass as he followed the guy at a comfortable distance, almost at the door now while Tachibana drew closer and closer to the brook on the other side of the schoolyard…

“ _Haru-chaaan!_ ” cried Nagisa upon swooping into view between Haruka and his target, having come over from the other building with Rei to try and catch their friend for lunch. Further away, Tachibana skidded to a halt and turned back to see two boys practically ambushing Haruka, but whipped his head away just as instantly to keep on walking. Whether he was laughing or not was impossible to discern from the distance, but it didn’t matter. Haru glared hail and ice in his general direction regardless.

“We were just looking for you, Haru-chan!” chirped Nagisa, who immediately attached himself to Haruka’s arm, unaware of the blizzard raging above his head. “Guess what? We gave Ama-chan our application form this morning! The school board’s going to discuss it this afternoon!”

“Haruka-senpai… are you alright?” asked Rei in a cautious tone. Nagisa finally took a good look at Haru’s face, but must have seen nothing beyond shock because he went on to say, his voice rainbows and sunshine,

“He cannot believe how efficient we are! Isn’t that right, Haru-chan?”

Haru finally stopped staring into the distance that claimed Tachibana, forcing himself to look at Nagisa.

“I’m fine,” he said, taking a step forward. “I have to go.”

“Are we interrupting something, Haru-chan?” asked Nagisa a little too innocently, suddenly more interested in Haruka than his own good news or eating lunch. “Are you on your way to meet someone, perhaps..?”

Haru’s brow twitched.

“…No,” he replied, amazed at how their eager attempt to catch him off-guard conveniently caused them to lose sight of the person they were actually longing to see.

“Then let’s have lunch on the roof again!” suggested Nagisa.

“If Haruka-senpai really has no prior engagements…” mumbled Rei, now just plain sheepish. Haru gave him a look.

“Whatever.”

There was no reasoning with his own bad luck, not after a five-day streak. Haru would just have to catch Tachibana after their last class. Having resigned himself to do so, he spent the rest of his lunch break staring wistfully towards the trees, while Nagisa quizzed him and occasionally followed his eyes, to no avail. Haru let his gaze wander around just to keep him guessing, amusing himself with the idea that of at least two dozen second-years from three different classrooms spending their lunch break in the schoolyard, Nagisa might have actually looked at Tachibana several times and never once guessed who he was.

* * *

Haruka returned to class just moments before sixth period began. Upon his arrival, he found Tachibana sitting at his desk, back straight and eyes fixed on the blackboard as though he had not stopped playing the role of the model student since first period. The distant look on his face seemed unnatural, alarmingly so. Haru ended up walking past him at a much slower pace than usual, just to force his attention elsewhere and dislodge the strange blank mask he had hidden behind, but it didn’t work. Tachibana’s eyes flickered, but he barely raised them, and having arrived at his own desk unaccomplished, Haruka dropped into his chair like a bag of rocks, glaring into space. What was the guy hoping for at the threshold of his self-constructed pigeon hole, to clean his slate by exercising restraint eight million years too late? Haruka would have rather he were stupid, and obnoxious... and warmly, unreservedly cheerful. The troublemakers sitting nearby were in loud chatter over some new anime series, and Haruka could not help but think it a happy liberty neither of them deserved, not when a boy of ten times their worth sat in silence and enjoyed himself so little.

As their last class was about to end, Haruka began to assess his situation, observing with relief that Tachibana didn’t seem to be in a hurry at all. While the others were already putting away their pens or fidgeting with the handles of their backpacks, the guy sat relaxed and focused on the assignment they were being given for the weekend. When class was dismissed, he remained as he was, letting the others pour out the door and stampede down the halls to extend their precious free time by just a few more minutes. Only then did he start gathering his things at a leisurely place, as if purposefully lingering to let the rest of class move ahead, far away from him with no chances of more unpleasant experiences. Normally, his plan would have succeeded, but Haruka lingered too, his things already packed and his hands tucked under the desk. His time had come at last. It was now or never.

“Tachibana.”

He called him by his name for the first time, and it was somehow comical to watch the guy twitch and stop everything he was doing, slowly turning to Haruka.

“Nanase-kun..?” he began to say, but the next moment, a transparent plastic container was held out to him as Haru lowered his eyes, unsure if he could do this with a straight face.

“For the sandwich,” he said quietly, his arm twitching forward a little more. Tachibana continued to stare, his mouth a small O.

“I… you’re very kind, but you didn’t have to give me anything for it, Nanase-kun,” he said, his voice softening as he looked at the container that seemed to hold rice and some soggy fish on the side. “Really, it’s fine—”

“Are you going to take it or not?” said Haru, finally giving him an annoyed look. “I’m giving it to you so we become even. You don’t have to _eat_ it,” he explained, his face contorting at the thought of good mackerel going to waste. Tachibana’s upturned eyebrows ran higher, but he soon broke into a grin and reached out, relieving Haru of the mackerel cooked in miso. He took it into both hands, turning it about as though he had never seen anything like it. Haru colored. Was the guy trying to find fault with his cooking?

“Are we even?” he asked impatiently. Tachibana lifted his head, his eyes brighter than Haru had seen them in a while.

“We are,” he said, his grin widening. “Thank you… Haru.”

Haruka made a face. “Don’t call me that. Call me by my last name.”

“But, wouldn’t it be easier to just call each other by our first names?” said the other, sounding painfully sensible again. “Tachibana is a mouthful and while Nanase-kun is fine, I think I’d rather call you Haru, and then you could call me Makoto. Though I suppose I could call you Haruka…”

Haru’s shoulders tensed at the unfamiliar address that seemed almost as offensive as—

“Or should I call you _Haru-chan?_ ” continued Tachibana, now just plain amused. Haru narrowed his eyes.

“If you call me that, I will never speak to you again.”

“Well then, I’ll definitely go with Haru,” replied Tachibana, soon lifting his backpack to his shoulders while his hand cradled the container to his side, just as Haruka had done earlier in search for him. As for Haru, he now stood there dumbstruck and thoroughly bested.

“Thank you again… _Haru_. See you on Monday,” said Tachibana as he cocked his head to the side, beaming brightly at Haruka, who could only hum in reply as the guy left the classroom.

When he followed a few moments later and turned in the opposite direction, Haru couldn’t decide what offended him more: Nagisa messing up his perfect opportunity earlier, Tachibana tricking him now, or the way Haru’s name rolled so easily off his tongue, spoken with such tenderness it turned his cheeks crimson.

At least he didn’t have to see anyone for two days. Nagisa, Rei, and Kou had no reason to pay him unexpected visits right now, and nobody else at school knew his address or his number. As long as he stayed inside, he would be safe, free to contemplate just what he had gotten himself into when he tried to settle the score, and instead managed to somehow convince Tachibana they were slowly becoming acquaintances, even friends. The idea of committing himself to someone again, of exposing himself to the danger of another letdown filled Haru with constant unease. Now it was almost imperative that Nagisa and Rei never meet Tachibana. If the guy didn’t latch on himself, Nagisa would attach him by sheer force of will. He texted Haruka on Sunday night, telling him to _Meet me and Rei-chan at the Faculty Office at lunch time. See you there, Haru-chan!_ , and Haru was almost certain he was going to go back to class a captain by the time they would be done.

* * *

“Good morning, Haru,” Tachibana greeted him on Monday, his voice quiet but nonetheless drawing attention in a classroom where nobody had ever called Haruka anything except ‘Nanase.’ Nobody laughed this time, too surprised or too much caught up in speculation as to when and how this change came about, especially when Haru put up no resistance beyond shooting Tachibana a look, which did nothing to dampen the smiles of the other.

For the first time, they engaged in short, loose conversation during breaks. Tachibana inquired about Haru’s weekend, and learned it was okay. He asked who made the excellent fish, and was told Haruka made it himself. He thanked Haru with more praise, and received a hum in reply.

Everyone around them seemed intrigued by this development, but teased and gossiped little, for which Haru was glad. However, come lunch time, Tachibana managed to give them more and more things to talk about when he turned to Haruka and said,

“Here, Haru,” placing the container from Friday on the other’s desk with something snuggly nestled inside. “It’s mochi. I’m not sure if you like sweet things, but..”

Haru looked up at him, his eyes large. Was this really happening? Was he now caught in a potentially expanding chain of exchanges with Tachibana, each new turn eliciting another until he might have to spend every day cooking just to appease this guy?

“You don’t have to give me anything in return,” said Tachibana soothingly, as though he had read Haruka’s mind. “I went to pick up my siblings after school that day, and they were so hungry we ended up sharing your fish to tide them over until dinner.. This is to say thank you for actually doing us a favor,” he explained with a humble smile, and by the time he finished, Haru’s shoulders slackened, his head strangely and pleasantly empty.

“Oh,” he managed to say, gathering the container to his bento. “..I have to go now.”

“See you later, Haru,” replied Tachibana, sounding perfectly content. Haruka nodded and left the classroom with floating steps, calmer than he felt he had any right to be.

* * *

Nagisa and Rei were already waiting for him outside the Faculty Office, their own lunches dangling from their hands in plastic bags, to be eaten right after their summons.

“Hey, Haru-chan!” chirped Nagisa, his eyes slipping to Haruka’s parcels as if he were looking for another ‘sandwich,’ or any small clue about the new friend that continued to remain a mystery to him and Rei. “Ooh, what’s that?”

Haruka looked down, his arm tightening just a little more around his lunch. “Mochi.”

“Can I have some?”

“No.”

“Aww..!”

“Nagisa-kun, we have more important matters to attend to than mere food… No disrespect to your mochi, Haruka-senpai,” said Rei as he motioned to the door, obviously waiting for the appointed captain to lead his team. Haru shrugged his shoulders and entered with the two of them right behind him, proceeding to Amakata Miho’s desk in single file, then lining up in front of her.

“Good day, boys,” she greeted them, lifting a piece of paper off her desk. “Regarding the swim club charter that you submitted…” she began in a dramatic tone, “…after strict review by the faculty… it was approved!” she announced, holding it out for them to see. Rei was so overwhelmed he could not speak, and Haru offered no comment, but Nagisa was loud enough for all three of them.

“Awesome!” he cried, pumping his fists. “I knew we could count on a former swimwear company employee!”

“Th-That’s right… This is what I can do when I put my mind to it,” replied Amakata-sensei, recovering quickly this time. “However, a school organization is required to have four members, so you’ll have to find one more person.”

The boys peered at each other, their confidence wavering for a moment, but the problem was set aside while they turned back to their new advisor for further news.

“And there’s one more condition,” finished Amakata Miho, holding up the charter to her face like a shield.

“No problem!” said Nagisa.

“I am ready to do anything for our swim club!” declared Rei, straightening in salute.

* * *

Ten minutes later, they were staring at the most pitiful outdoor pool in existence, littered with garbage and infested by vegetation growing from every crack time had clawed into the concrete.

“Wow, so much nature,” said Nagisa, staring awestruck as the wind playfully picked up and carried off a few strips of paper right in front of him. Beside him, Rei was staring at the jungle below in horror, just barely managing to force out if this meant what he thought it meant.

“Yes, you must restore this pool to a usable state,” said Amakata Miho, her tone as light as her non-involvement policy was apparent. Haruka took a deep breath, then one cowardly step backwards, but he was caught at once, his hand seized by his teacher in an iron grip.

“You’re not allowed to run away ever again, Nanase-kun,” she said cheerfully.

“I-Indeed… the captain must lead in example, Haruka-senpai…” stammered Rei, his eyes now covered to protect his sense of beauty so abominably abused by weed and debris. Haru huffed, but immediately set down his bento and container, careful to stack his lunch on top of the mochi to Nagisa’s chagrin. He crouched and climbed into the pool, rolling his sleeves back. For all intents and purposes, it was still a pool. The sooner it was restored, the sooner Haru would swim.

“Wait, Haru-chan!” Nagisa called after him as torn leaves and stems came flying left and right. “You don’t have to start right away..!”

“Stop talking and help me,” was Haruka’s reply, soon tackling an entire bush sprouting from the cracks.

“Let’s eat lunch first, okay?! We could talk about this over mochi!”

“No.”

“ _Haru-chaaan…!_ ”

* * *

When Haruka returned to class an hour later, the mochi was gone, eaten right under Nagisa’s nose as punishment for not helping. His hands were also a sickly shade of green that laughed in the face of soap and water. Tachibana quirked an eyebrow at him.

“Were you handling plants just now?” he asked, apparently no stranger to grass stains and their ilk. Haruka hummed.

“Maybe you should bring a pair of rubber gloves next time,” suggested Tachibana, and as he was once again making too much sense, Haru found himself nodding in agreement.

“…Do you need any help, Haru?” asked Tachibana. Haruka finally looked him in the eye.

“No,” he said at once, then added, feeling prompted, “It’s for the swim club. We have to fix a pool.”

“I didn’t know Iwatobi High School had a swim club,” mused Tachibana, shooting Haru a curious glance.

“It does now,” replied Haruka, unsure what to make of Tachibana’s blind offer. He was only secure in the thought that several weeks of manual labor would ensure he’d have little time to spend with his new acquaintance, which was what he wanted all along…

“Congratulations, then. And good luck,” said Tachibana. Haru hummed again, but his eyes drifted to the window in thought. Having a reputation of being talented and reliable, his help was often solicited for school assignments and even extra-curricular work, but no one had ever offered _him_ any help before. He could not help but wonder if Tachibana would have agreed to help de-weed an entire swimming pool had Haru said yes, but something in his heart of hearts told him that of all people, Tachibana might have and might have done it gladly, just for kindness’ sake. It was a strange feeling, neither good nor bad – it was simply something new.


	9. EPISODE 2: Memories in the Distance! - Part 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haru’s premonition proved correct, at least in part. What awaited the three of them was indeed several weeks of tedious manual labor as they gathered garbage and plucked weed from the entire pool area, only to discover that it also needed repairs and a few coats of paint to be truly serviceable. It was daunting, and more than fit the definition of ‘too much effort,’ but Haruka’s resolve only seemed to grow every hour. By the time he had arrived home after their first official cleaning session, his decision to sacrifice the better part of his lunch break every day was final, while Nagisa and Rei decided they would put in as much time after school as they could spare from commuting and other obligations. At the end of the next school day, they greeted Haruka from the depths of the pool, where their captain simply carried on what he had been doing for fifty minutes during his lunch hour, the remaining ten spent on food not to try his endurance too much. Despite his own wish to hurry up with cleaning, he didn’t expect Nagisa or Rei to be so strict with themselves. A scant hour of solitude and productive repose was more than welcome, as it helped clear his head each time it filled with troubled thoughts of Rin and mixed feelings about Tachibana, both washed away by the faraway promise of water, _water, **water.**_

As for thinking that Haruka would thus spend less and less time with Tachibana, until he eventually drifted apart from the acquaintance he had never asked for and still wasn’t sure he wanted, he could not have been further from the truth. While Tachibana made no attempts to follow him or force his company on Haru, he never let him go without wishing him good luck, and quickly became an inexhaustible source of support and encouragement that never ceased to surprise and amaze Haruka.

From that day onward, they spent every school day in loose conversation. Once they said their good mornings, Tachibana always made a point to inquire about his progress, and since Haruka had turned down his help, yet taken his advice to use rubber gloves, he repaid Tachibana by talking a great deal about the pool. He described how it looked at first, and what difference cleaning away just the garbage had made; how they could finally see one corner of the pool after plucking for several hours, and what sort of repairs they might have to do once they uncovered all the cracks. It was more than Haruka ever thought his taciturn nature would allow, and more than anyone could reasonably stand to hear about something as tedious as restoration work, but whenever he though he had exhausted all there was to say about the matter, Tachibana asked him questions that invited easy answers, and so Haruka’s words kept trickling forth. Tachibana asked Haru if he had ever done construction work the likes of which he felt were necessary, and learned that Haruka once made a path with bricks and cement not to track mud into his house from the garden. Haru considered it a rather mundane feat, but the guy was amazed, thoroughly impressed. Indeed, Haruka had never known a more attentive or gratifying listener when he thought of how loud and chatty Nagisa was, or the way Rei tended to interrupt and argue when he disagreed with even the slightest detail of what was being said. There was something about Tachibana that made conversation simple, made the words feather-light and coaxed them from Haruka like one draws a breath without thinking, until he even admitted to Tachibana, when the guy asked about their shopping venture, that Haruka was banned from the biggest home improvement store in Iwatobi for climbing into the display tank while everyone else was too busy looking for cement and paint to pay any attention to him. Tachibana was all shock and chided him for it, which annoyed Haruka, but he also chuckled in amusement, and somehow his laugh sounded more and more bearable each day, all the more so because the others’ snide laughter could no longer diminish its light-hearted ring one bit.

As if their work on the pool hadn’t been enough enough, Haruka and Nagisa also frequented the Iwatobi Art Club after school, to produce posters for whenever they would finally be in a sound position to start recruitment. Rei also accompanied them from time to time, but only to encourage and evaluate their efforts, rather than do any work of his own. His artistic talents were about equal to Tachibana’s, and where he wasn’t obliged to display them, his sense of beauty prevented him from attempting anything that would inevitably result in failure. Nagisa, however, wasn’t afraid in the slightest. Instead of squeezing his meager knowledge of perspective and proportions dry, he went bold with neon-bright Picassos that made Rei’s hair stand on edge. As for Tachibana, he was obviously no contender, but once he learned of Haru’s endeavors, he often asked to see his posters, and never failed to praise his talent for rendering anatomically correct figures and breathtaking backgrounds with ease and good taste. In the end, Haruka proved to be so gifted that what eventually ended their cooperation with their fellow artists was a scuffle between the two clubs over who had greater need of Nanase Haruka. Had it not been for Nagisa and Rei’s excellent physical condition, the Art Club might have actually succeeded in carrying off Haruka as their most coveted prize: unlike the meager swim club, their strength was in numbers.

Within one week, Haruka’s mind had been all but consumed by his extra-curricular work, his head full of restoration plans and pleasant prospects he used to keep carefully in check, but now reveled in with little to no restraint. It was a gradual and mysterious new development, one for which Haru placed the blame entirely on Tachibana’s shoulders for erecting a safety net that held up Haruka whenever his grip on reality started to slip. It began with a course book forgotten at home, for which he was scolded by the guy and then handed Tachibana’s book to read before class. It then continued with too little mackerel in Haru’s bento, which was quickly supplemented with some tamagoyaki, and though Haruka’s halfhearted preparations never reached ridiculous extremes, it put Tachibana on his guard and Haruka at newfound ease. For the first time in his teenage life, he found that anything that was going wrong simply had to be voiced, and somehow it would be fixed. It was almost a game of testing Tachibana’s resourcefulness…

“Haru? Is everything alright?” asked Tachibana one day when Haruka’s was rummaging in his backpack for far too long, considering it was already lunch time.

“Gloves…” muttered Haruka, his hand sinking uselessly into his backpack over and over in search of his rubber gloves, which he had removed at home to air out, then promptly left for school without. Not that any lack of rubber gloves, lunch, or school material would have prevented him from his continued efforts of de-weeding the pool, but still… _What a nuisance._ Haru made a face. Tachibana sighed.

“Here, Haru,” he said as he opened his desk, producing an unopened packet of brand new rubber gloves that he held out to Haruka with a look of fond exasperation. “I thought you might need these sooner or later.”

Haruka stared at him embarrassed, but before he could protest, Tachibana simply dropped the packet onto his bento boxes to make his decision easier.

“Now hurry up, or you won’t have time to eat and work!”

…except Tachibana’s resourcefulness knew no bounds, not to mention it was the sort of game where Haruka’s victory would have signified a loss either way. As much as he could have lived with his own mistakes, he might have worried, just a little, if he had inadvertently made Tachibana feel like he had failed, when the guy had obviously given the situation a great deal of thought. How Tachibana managed to pay so much attention to Haru’s potential needs when he already had himself and a pair of ten-year-olds to look after, Haruka couldn’t even guess, but it didn’t matter. All that mattered was that he did, and he was reliable and useful in a way nobody else before him had ever been. Tachibana even went so far as to defend Haru to teachers for being late to sixth period (“He has uh, school-related obligations during lunchtime that take him further away from the classroom, Sensei..”), so when Haruka turned up some minutes afterwards, all he received from the front desk was, “I know, Nanase, sit down,” and a sheepish smile from the enabler himself. _Meddlesome busybody,_ thought Haruka each time, but as he walked back to his desk, his steps felt lighter than air.

And so work was progressing well, very well. Within a few weeks, Nagisa, Rei, and Haruka were cutting the foliage peeking through the fence links, smearing cement into the cracks, smoothing the sides with easels, and applying the first coat of paint to the walls. The first-year pair continued to come only in the afternoons, leaving Haruka to an hour of peaceful work all by himself. He was never truly alone, however, least of all in spirit. Unbeknownst to him, almost from the very beginning, Tachibana watched him from the roof every day at lunch break, just barely able to distinguish that small figure in the distance, but smiling at him all the same.

* * *

In the three weeks it had taken for his former friends to establish a brand new swim club and restore a good deal of the once abandoned pool area at Iwatobi High School, Rin did little more than idle at Samezuka Academy as far as his swimming career was concerned. He had received “N.A.’s” note on his return that very night, but merely tucked it into his other pocket and tossed it onto the desk when he retired to his room. The note clearly didn’t come from the captain himself, and “at your earliest convenience” could hardly be considered an urgent call, especially from someone who didn’t even bother to attach their name. It was undoubtedly a student, but as nobody in his new class shared the initials, the mysterious messenger remained “N/A” in Rin’s mind along with the contents of his note, for a while longer at least.

He lay down on the bed, staring down his father’s younger self in the photograph he had taken from the Iwatobi Swimming Club. The chipped-tooth smile of that boy in all his grade-school glory soon worked its magic on him, dripping firm resolve into the son that outlived him and inherited his legacy too suddenly, too soon. Rin closed his eyes. If the captain of the Samezuka swim team was really interested in him, a few weeks hardly mattered. Rin would generously let himself be persuaded before long.

Fortunately for him, the captain and his messenger exercised exemplary patience towards the wayward prodigy. Nitori could hardly be faulted for being lenient and excusing his elusive Senpai at every practice, but he need not have bothered, as Mikoshiba persevered for more reasons than simply wishing to secure another talented swimmer for the team. He had run into Kou only once since their meeting, and was sorry he had no good news to give her, having hoped to see that sweet smile again upon personally informing the young lady of her brother’s promotion. The promise of that smile, and the enormous responsibility of having received her e-mail address for related correspondence was incentive enough to pursue the stubborn student, who seemed to maintain good relations with no one, not even his fellow classmates, some of whom were on the swim team themselves. It was an utter mystery. Had it not been for the excellent sister, Seijuurou might have wondered far more often if he and Nitori were being unfairly imposed upon by an antisocial recluse who showed no inclination to grace them with his much-coveted attention.

* * *

As the pool was slowly but surely approaching its new, clean state, it was time to put Nagisa and Haru’s recruitment posters to the test. They first made their debut on bulletin-boards and classroom news boards, then made their appearance in the hallways fixed onto every available space not protected by school property effacement laws, but that wasn’t the full extent of their advertising. After some consideration, Nagisa and Rei decided to dedicate at least half of their lunch hour to promoting the club, waiting at more crowded areas in swim caps and goggles to wave their kickboards at unsuspecting passersby.

“Hello there! Are you interested in joining the newly formed Iwatobi Swim Club?” said Rei as he roamed the halls hoping to catch students off-guard, but many of them had already joined the clubs they were interested in, or worse, had joined one of the other sports teams, which would have been entirely too taxing to coordinate with swim practice and various tournament dates. Rei recognized one of his lost causes as the second-year he had bumped into some weeks before, but the guy could not be persuaded even after a much longer string of apologies, which were cordially but very nervously dismissed.

“Hey, guys! Let’s have fun swimming together!” cried Nagisa back at their own building, nudging his penguin kickboard at weary first-years, who merely replied,

“Why would you want to swim in a pool when the ocean’s right over there..?”

“If you join now, you’ll receive a year’s supply of Iwatobi’s mascot character, Iwatobi-chan!” announced Nagisa a few days later, waving around a hand-made strap of what at first glance appeared to be a chicken in a speedo.

“No, thanks,” replied the crowd, obviously mean and unappreciative of Haruka’s efforts, who had been rather easily roped into carving some two dozen wooden figurines of Iwatobi-chan for greater incentive. He was still working on them when Rei and Nagisa collapsed inside the changing rooms of their future pool one afternoon, both of them thoroughly demoralized.

“I can’t believe nobody wants to join,” whined Nagisa, lying down on one of the benches. Rei was sitting in a chair right next to him, his head pressed against the backrest.

“It looks like our efforts might have been in vain… I cannot believe we restored the entire pool area for nothing..!”

“Don’t say that!” Nagisa scolded him, the two exchanging worried glances, then risking a peek at Haruka, who seemed completely engrossed in his art project, and would hopefully remain deaf to their wails for a little while longer. Rei and Nagisa sighed in relief.

“Maybe we’re not exciting enough…” mused Nagisa. A moment later, his breath hitched and his hands landed on Rei’s shoulders with twinkling eyes. “Rei-chan! I think it’s time we swapped your boring high school uniform for a swimsuit, to generate greater interest!”

“Wh-What are you saying, Nagisa-kun?!” stammered Rei. “Would you have me pose in nothing but a legskin in front of the student body? There _are_ limits to a vice-captain’s dedication, you know!”

“Aaawww, don’t say that…!” whined Nagisa, but no amount of head nudges and burrowing against Rei’s shoulder could make him change his mind. “Come ooon… take one for the team..!”

“ _Absolutely not!_ ”

“Then you have left us no choice, Rei-chan,” said Nagisa with furrowed brows. “If you won’t put your body on the line, then Ama-chan has to do it in your place!”

“What are you talking about, Nagisa-kun..?”

“We’ll advertise the fact that Ama-chan is our advisor, and tell everyone they’ll get to see her in a swimsuit if they join!” said Nagisa, dead-set on his emergency plan despite the frown that met his words. Rei fixed his glasses with a finger.

“ _Brilliant_ plan, Nagisa-kun,” he said acridly, “I’m sure _absolutely nothing_ could go wrong.”

“ ** _Excuse me…_** ” came an ice cold voice from behind their backs, startling Rei into immediate regret that he even dared use sarcasm instead of swift and thorough rejection of Nagisa’s crazy schemes. Nagisa seemed to share his regret for once. Amakata-sensei loomed over both, glaring daggers as she went on to say, “If you do that, I’ll quit immediately! I swore to myself that I’d _never put on a swimsuit again!_ ” She paused to flash them a smile that promised cheerful murder. “ _Understood?_ Are we clear?”

“Crystal…” breathed Rei and Nagisa. In the back, Haruka resumed work on Iwatobi-chan number seventeen, without any indication he had noticed them at all.

* * *

Now that the general area no longer looked like a disaster site and the boys had been put in their place, Amakata-sensei graciously decided to join them more often under the title of “advisory supervision,” nestling comfortably under her umbrella in a folding chair as the swim club mixed, applied, and smoothed cement into the holes and cracks of the pool.

“It’s cleaned up rather nicely,” she said to them one day as she sunk into her chair again to enjoy the pleasant view.

“Can’t you get out of that chair for once and give us a hand?” complained Nagisa, motioning towards the cement he was mixing in the middle, while Rei and Haruka were busy working on the pool walls.

“Do you realize what you’re saying?” Amakata-sensei scolded him, dangling her foot daintily beneath the umbrella. “The UV rays are _brutal_ this time of year. You’re still young so it’s not an issue, but _I_ have to be more careful.”

Nagisa dismissed her concerns, but Rei paused to wonder if he should have applied sunscreen before he set out to work, not having properly considered the dangers of prolonged exposure to the sun. He turned to his senpai and asked for his opinion, but the reply was no more than a vague shrug of Haruka’s shoulders, which told Rei nothing and left him stranded as his attempts at dialogue so often seemed to do. Nagisa always initiated rather easily, no matter how many times Haruka failed to respond in kind, but being so used to someone chipper and talkative, Rei simply felt like a rubber battering ram bouncing off an impenetrable wall.

They ran into Kou some days before and invited her to come by and check the pool. A few more days passed without her, but on that very day, she finally heeded their invitation, soon entering the area with a shopping bag of refreshments dangling from her arm.

“Oh wow, it’s all cleaned up now!” she said when she stopped by Amakata-sensei’s chair, sounding thoroughly impressed.

“Yoo hoo!” cried Nagisa when he spotted her, waving happily. “Are you here to help, Gou-chan?”

“ _Kou-chan-san_ , Nagisa-kun..!”

“You heard him!” snapped Kou. “I told you to call me Kou! Otherwise you don’t get any of this,” she continued, holding up a can of soda.

“ _What?_ You can’t be serious!” whined Nagisa, but in the end, he thanked ‘Kou-chan’ as he picked out a can of Pocket Sweat, gulping down half of it in one go. Kou then went round to give everyone a drink, then paused to consider her options. Nagisa continued to mix and Haru remained in the pool, but since the cement had to dry, Rei was free to abandon his station to paint the fence for a while, and did so gladly to exchange awkward silence for solitary work. After a moment’s consideration, Kou decided to follow him.

“I’ll leave your drink here, Rei-kun,” she said as she set the can down a few feet to his right, out of everyone’s way.

“Thank you very much, Kou-san,” replied Rei, setting some newspapers below the fence to catch any drips of green paint. With some hesitation, Kou clasped the hems of her skirt on each side and tucked it carefully under herself, crouching down to join Rei.

“Rei-kun… can I ask you a question?”

Rei adjusted his glasses. “Of course.”

“How come Haruka-senpai didn’t start a swim club before the two of you came here and asked him? I mean, he’s such a good swimmer, and this is his second year. I would have thought he’d start a club as soon as he started going to Iwatobi High School.”

“I’m afraid I don’t know the answer to that, Kou-san,” said Rei, shaking his head. “We asked Haruka-senpai on the night of the opening ceremony if he wanted to swim with us, and he said he had quit swimming competitively. He never mentioned why or when he had quit, but if he came to that decision years ago, that would explain why he wasn’t interested in forming or joining a club.”

“So he didn’t want to swim at all.”

“Probably, though it’s so hard to imagine. The Haruka-senpai I knew never seemed to get enough of swimming the front crawl. That stroke was all he ever talked about. He literally said, _I only swim free_ , or freestyle. I don’t understand at all.”

“I wonder if my brother’s the same way…” risked Kou.

“What do you mean?” asked Rei, his brow creased.

“I was looking for my brother at Samezuka Academy a few weeks ago, and found out he’s not on the swim team,” explained Kou. “He transferred to a professional swimming school, but he didn’t join the swim club, and when I went to see him last Wednesday, he was still not a member.”

“That cannot be right, Kou-san,” said Rei, looking shocked. “I mean, Rin-senpai himself challenged Haruka-senpai at the Samezuka Academy indoor pool and—”

“He must have lost,” sighed Kou, her eyes clouding. “So that’s why he’s given up on swimming…”

“You are mistaken, Kou-san,” said Rei, pressing his glasses into place again. “Rin-senpai didn’t lose to Haruka-senpai. He won.”

“What?!” cried Kou, just as shocked as Rei had been. “My brother won?!”

“It was a clear victory. Rin-senpai didn’t tell you…?”

“He didn’t respond, so I thought he was upset about losing,” owned Kou.

“Now that you mention it, Kou-san, it was really strange… Rin-senpai didn’t seem very pleased that he had won. When Haruka-senpai congratulated him on his victory, Rin-senpai nearly strangled him with his own goggle straps! Nagisa-kun and I were bewildered, but before we could interfere and separate them, one of the teachers found us trespassing and we were forced to leave.”

“That’s strange… and why would Haruka-senpai say that after losing?” said Kou, looking lost. Rei adjusted his glasses again.

“That is easy, Kou-san,” he replied, now sounding more self-assured. “It was simply an excellent display of sportsmanship. I expected nothing less from a professional!”

“Is that so?” said Kou, her eyes narrowing as Rei hummed and straightened himself with a smug smirk. “Then what would you call what my brother did, when he actually attended a professional swimming school for years, _Rei-kun…?_ ”

“ _Aaahh!_ ” yelped Rei, nearly dropping his brush in protest at Kou’s protective sisterly glare. “No offense intended to Rin-senpai, no offense whatsoever! But, I mean… what else would it have been but a polite gesture from one athlete to another?”

“I don’t know… but it just doesn’t seem like how my brother used to be,” sighed Kou, lowering her head. “I wish he could go back to being his old self again. He was so excited to swim with you guys, and so happy when you all won…”

“I’m sorry, Kou-san,” whispered Rei, not knowing what else to say to her. She closed her eyes, but her features soon hardened in resolve.

“You still need one more member, right, Rei-kun?”

“Ah, that’s right,” came the confused reply. Kou clenched her fists, turning to Rei with flashing eyes.

“ _Please let me join!_ ”

“Kou-san?!” yelped Rei, nearly dropping his brush again. Kou quickly composed herself, exchanging her glare of thunder for a gentle smile.

“You’re the only ones who can help my brother,” she said softly, looking up at Rei. “If you’re willing to have me, I can serve as your manager and help you out!”

“Ooh, ooh! What’s going on?” Nagisa called out to them when he caught Kou’s excited tone. Rei turned back to him, lifting his hands to his mouth to shout,

“Kou-san has offered to join the Iwatobi Swim Club as our manager!”

“What? Really?!” cried Nagisa in reply, then jumped to his feet in joy, leaving Haruka crouched by the wall. “That means the swim club is officially open for business! Yaaay!”

Haru said nothing, but had they looked, they would have seen him smile to himself for a fleeting moment, very sensible of how excited everyone was to swim together at last. More importantly, he too was one step closer to the water with four members, and that sufficed for momentary happiness.

* * *

Practice at Samezuka Academy was almost over for that day when the door to the indoor pool area opened and in stepped the now infamous Matsuoka Rin, leaning casually against the wall to watch the swim team complete their final laps. Captain Mikoshiba didn’t notice him at first, far too busy shouting at the currently timed second-year to pick up the pace, but Nitori spotted the visitor quickly, and the moment he discerned whom he was looking at, his strangled gasp finally alerted Seijuurou as well. Neither was looking at the others anymore when the second-year’s hands hit the wall at last, so when Nakagawa came up for air and asked for his time, he asked in vain. Seijuurou didn’t even hear him, and Nitori had quite forgotten to pause his stopwatch.

“That’s it for today, men! Hit the showers!” shouted Captain Mikoshiba, never taking his eyes off the much anticipated brother, who showed none of the courtesy or pleasantness of his lovely sister. He lingered by the door for a while longer with his arms folded over his chest, as though he expected the captain to walk over to him, but when Seijuurou merely shouted at him to “State your business!” and blocked Nitori’s path with a hand to detain him from running over to the haughty stranger, Rin at last pushed himself away from the wall and approached them, his expression almost hostile. The closer he drew to them, the more Nitori fiddled with his stopwatch until he nearly dropped it. Rin gave him a look, then fixed his eyes on the captain, locking him in a stare that Seijuurou withstood with ease.

“Captain,” was all Rin said when he finally got within arm’s reach, sinking a hand into his pocket. Mikoshiba quirked an eyebrow that arched steeper still when he was presented with a piece of paper, which he was obliged to unfold himself. Nitori quickly inched behind Seijuurou, his cheeks growing hotter every second.

“You wanted to see me,” added Rin as Mikoshiba perused the note and recognized the initials of the diligent first-year, who had fulfilled his obligations and earned the promised arrangement Mikoshiba hoped none of them would regret. He slowly lowered his arm, held out the note behind his back for Nitori to take and then cracked a smirk, more at the prospect of soon having good news to relay to Gou-kun than from any gladness of having obtained the sulky wildcard for his team.

“I did. Come with me,” he said and the two soon left for the lounge, leaving Nitori to the furious beat of his heart and the slight tremble of his hand, his fingers curled reverently around the note that had brought them his senpai.


	10. EPISODE 2: Memories in the Distance! - Part 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ever since his mother’s move from the family house, Haruka’s parents had called their son every Sunday to inquire about his week, hoping to find him in good health, and to receive news of accomplishments befitting an exceptionally smart young man like himself. While they were always gratified in the former, the latter had rarely brought them more than disappointment. Haruka’s collection of awards had not grown since his abrupt decision to quit the Iwatobi Swimming Club at age thirteen, and he had engaged in nothing notable or even different in the years that followed. Close to his seventeenth birthday with little but former childhood glory to recommend him to the world, they would have settled for any scrap of good news, a few scattered somethings instead of Haruka’s constant answer of _Nothing, the usual, everything is fine._

Little did they know that their son had been carefully censoring himself since their phone call on the day of the opening ceremony. Afraid of his parents’ reaction to his faculty summons and too conflicted about Tachibana’s appearance, not to mention Rin’s reappearance, Haruka held his breath and said _Nothing_ as usual. There really was nothing to impart of his first school week to his faraway elders except grievances and afflictions, which were better off buried in some frostbitten cavern of his heart. Until…

“Have you and your friends made any progress on the pool?” asked his mother over the phone two weeks after the establishment of the Iwatobi Swim Club, of which Haruka had spoken little in their previous call except for mentioning the other members, and what they were required to do in order to have anywhere to practice.

“Yeah, we cleared out the weed,” replied Haruka, pinching the phone between his ear and shoulder as he fiddled with his dinner on the stove. “We might finish work by the end of next week.”

“That’s wonderful, Haruka! You will finally have somewhere to swim with your friends, maybe even enter a tournament after all these years… of course, you won’t be able to swim until June, I hope you realize that. Spring is much too cold to swim outdoors.”

Haruka’s face scrunched up in an annoyed pout.

“You sound just like Tachibana,” he said, glaring absently at his dinner as he scraped the sides of the pot and gave his rice a rough stir. There was a pause at the end of the line.

“Tachibana? Tachibana who?”

The spatula clanked hard against the pot. Haruka bit his lip, glad nobody could see the way his cheeks colored in… in what? Embarrassment? _Guilt?_

“Haruka?”

“…Just a guy from class.”

“Oh? You’ve never mentioned him before, Haruka. Is he your friend? Is he in the swim club?”

Haru lowered his eyes, one hand tightening on the handle of the pot.

“No. No, he’s not.”

“Well, he sounds very sensible at any rate,” said his mother to break the silence. “Don’t swim in the pool until June. They probably won’t fill it until then anyway.”

“I won’t. …Good night.”

“Good night, Haruka. Please take care of yourself.”

“I will,” said Haru, then quickly pressed _End Call_ , his eyes drifting to the pot again. He fished a pair of chopsticks out of the drawer and began plucking clump after clump of rice straight out of the pot, scolding himself for his carelessness as he wondered, if only faintly and with more unease than hope, whether Tachibana ever mentioned him to his family at home. Haruka prayed he did not. After all… what was there to even say about him..?

_Nanase Haruka, a guy with a girly name. Still unable to take care of himself. Eats and cooks mackerel. A garbage man in his free time… and always, “always like this.”_

* * *

_His name is Nanase Haruka. Finally I’m not the only guy with a girly name..! He didn’t bring any lunch, so I gave him some of mine. I’ll have some, thank you. No.. he doesn’t seem to have any friends in class. Nobody came over to his desk during breaks, nobody at all. It’s weird because he looked like he was feeling unwell, but nobody asked him if he was alright or if he needed anything. I don’t get it. The girls told me he’s a genius, and a reliable guy. He sounds like a good person, but it looks like nobody really cares about him.. It’s kind of sad, but.. if he really **is** lonely in class… perhaps he won’t mind if I talk to him sometimes…_

_Ama-chan-sensei came over to Nanase-kun’s desk and told him he was expected at the Faculty Office. I’m not sure why though, she didn’t say. Nanase-kun brought lunch today. I’m glad.. I worried at first that maybe he couldn’t afford lunch..! He brought mackerel. I asked him if he wanted to have lunch together, but he was in a hurry. Maybe some other time. I sat next to him in Art class today and you should have seen him draw! He’s really talented._

_No… we didn’t really speak today. Please excuse me…_

_No. I think.. I think I embarrassed Nanase-kun. It’s no good.. Perhaps I’d better leave him alone. Please excuse me.. . ._

_You will never believe what happened! Haru, Nanase-kun I mean, he gave me fish and rice for the sandwich I gave him on Monday! I told him he didn’t have to give me anything, but he insisted. It was really good! …I saw his friends too, two first-years. I ran into them on Wednesday. At the, the Faculty Office, when.. ah, it’s not important anymore. Haru, Nanase-kun, I think he’s nicer than the others give him credit for. I hope we can be friends..!_

_Guess what! They formed a swim club! Haru, I mean, and his two friends, the first-years. There’s a pool they need to fix, though. I guess it’s around here somewhere, I’ll go up to the roof tomorrow and take a look, maybe it’s nearby. Haru started working on it and his hands were all green by sixth period. …Mom? Do we have any spare rubber gloves at home..?_

_I saw the pool today! Yeah, it’s on school grounds, not too far from the building. Haru was there gathering weed and trash during lunch time. I think I’ll keep the gloves in my desk, just in case. I’ve never seen Haru so excited about anything before. It must mean a lot to him… I hope he’ll get to swim with his friends soon. I guess that would be in June at the earliest, though… It’s too cold to swim outdoors in spring._

* * *

And on went Makoto from day to day, week to week, always bringing home some small but nonetheless interesting trivia of Nanase “Haru” Haruka, and speaking of him with greater warmth and enthusiasm than any attempt at friendship had ever given him cause before. Fortunately for him, he could not have asked for more attentive listeners than his parents and little siblings. While Makoto tackled every year with renewed optimism, the four of them awaited each new start with dread that the beloved son or brother might once again find himself rejected and alone, unable to connect to others who had little need of someone whose affections and attachment ran deeper than any feelings he had ever managed to excite. Each time he found himself among new peers, Makoto always opened up with ease, but when his own gaze pierced through mere cracks in others with fond readiness, ready to advise and fuss, the shells around him clamped shut and he was pushed away, or worse, kept at a short distance where he felt neither needed nor unwanted: a lukewarm, wretched stalemate where he was fine as long as he wasn’t _too much_.

The first few days were always spent in wait. Navigating a new environment and mapping the temperament of others required silence and patience, which came quite easily to an observer like Makoto. It was the nature of his first conflicts, his peers’ initial reactions to his overbearing ways and gestures that were critical and truly decided what sort of year lay before him: sitting quietly so he would not be sanctioned, or clinging desperately to every shred of interaction in the hopes that his persistence might be rewarded. He hardly knew which version pained him or his family more. They were in alternation like the seasons, and just like the seasons themselves, Makoto’s relationships never truly altered once their pace was set. In a way, he seemed the reverse of his neighbor in class: while Nanase Haruka sat by his window staring idly at a world he wanted nothing to do with, Tachibana Makoto was desperately chasing a world that wanted nothing to do with him.

And so when he retired to his room too soon that first Wednesday, his family began to suspect that Nanase Haruka’s shell had closed despite Makoto’s every attempt to show him kindness. Makoto braced himself and left with a brave smile the next morning, but when he arrived and hurried off to his room again, the twins put aside tomorrow’s project to draw Onii-chan something cheerful for his bulletin board, while his mother abandoned her dinner plans to run to the shops and get everything for a last-minute green curry. Come evening, Makoto wiped his eyes, thanked them, and ate as much as his lack of appetite allowed. There was nothing he would not have done for those who loved him so much, so the next morning, when his siblings’ arts and crafts project fell apart the moment they tried to carry it downstairs, Makoto stayed behind of his own volition and helped them fix it at the cost of arriving late to first period. Punctuality could hardly matter when your little brother was in tears and your little sister begged you for help. Nobody needed him at school, but everyone had need of him at home.

Once he dropped off his siblings and their reassembled project (carried carefully by Onii-chan all the way to keep it intact), he hugged them and ran off to school with thundering steps as the twins waved after him with scrunched up faces, wishing Onii-chan didn’t have to go. He was to pick them up after school that day, and they were fully prepared to love him senseless should he betray any sign of sadness… but then were profoundly and pleasantly surprised when Onii-chan ran to them with his brightest smile, and the plastic container he was given by “Haru.” The twins squealed with delight, hugged and kissed him, then begged for some of the fish because it smelled delicious. His parents, too, sighed in relief once Makoto came home and talked a great deal with rekindled cheerfulness. They soon agreed to send Haruka some mochi as a token of their thanks, and on Monday evening, Makoto was presented with an unopened packet of brand new rubber gloves by his mother, along with the kind promise of something extra for every lunch thereafter if it might help “Haru” become the close friend her son had been wanting for so long.

* * *

The process was slow but steady, and Makoto seemed a little happier every day. He might not have been able to spend as much time with Haru as he would have liked, but the extra lunches and those rubber gloves ensured that he still played an indirect yet consequential part in the Iwatobi Swim Club’s efforts. That much was enough to keep Makoto’s spirits soaring high, and just as the last week of April had begun, he found himself in the happy position of being able to inform his family at dinner that going by Haru’s words and what he had seen from the roof, all restoration work had been completed on the pool.

“That’s wonderful news,” said his mother as she put the finishing touches on their dessert. “Sounds like they will soon get to swim again.”

“Yeah, though I suppose they still have a lot of work to do,” replied Makoto with a smile.

“Onii-chan, when are you going to bring Haru over?” asked Ran.

“Bring him over, Onii-chan! We want to see him!” pleaded Ren, both of them positively dying by now to get a glimpse of their older brother’s only friend, whom they looked on as a potential playmate for anything from board games to playing house. The twins tended to bicker about who would get to play whom in the latter, but of one thing they were certain: “Haru” would be allowed to do anything he liked short of marrying Onii-chan, who had long been reserved by both siblings with equally fervent claims to Makoto as the only perfect person in the world. Their older brother chuckled fondly, not knowing half of the plans revolving around him and his favorite classmate.

“It’s not that easy, else I would have brought him over already, but I’ll do that the moment Haru tells me he wants to come,” promised Makoto.

“ _Aaaah!_ That’s mine!” whined Ren the next moment, beaten to the last piece of ham by his sister while he was busy paying attention to Onii-chan. “Don’t take it!”

“You never finish your food,” snapped Ran, turning her head sharply in a manner that reminded Makoto of Haru.

“I always eat my ham!” pleaded her brother, almost in tears by the time Makoto moved in to break up the argument.

“Come on! Stop fighting,” he chided them, his words followed by sheepish silence. “Here,” he said to Ren next, plucking up some meat from his own plate. “You can have some of mine.”

The moment he gave either of them anything, the other of course had to be included, so Ran immediately begged him, “Onii-chan, I want some too!”

“There you go,” said Makoto, letting her have his last bit of ham. Their father chuckled.

“Say, Makoto,” he turned to his son, “You never did tell us if they were just water-enthusiasts or competitive swimmers.”

“I honestly don’t know,” replied Makoto, scratching his chin in thought. “But I suppose they must have been swimming competitively before if they are going through so much trouble to fix the pool…”

“It _is_ the only place they would be able to swim unless you count the ocean,” mused his father. “While they were younger and it was open, they might have gone to the Iwatobi Swimming Club in town. Remember that place? You had your swimming lessons there when you were six. The newspaper says it’s going to be torn down by the end of this week.”

“Really..?”

“Here, look,” his father said, showing him the short announcement on page four. “They started this afternoon. If they work hard enough, it’ll be gone in a day or two.”

The thought gave Makoto pause. The Swimming Club held no pleasant memories to him, none that he could immediately recall, but the idea of a younger Haru who might have gone there tugged at tender strings. He took a deep breath, his face strangely solemn as he said,

“I think I will go for a walk and see it one more time.”

“Alright,” replied his father. “Don’t be late.”

“Can we come?” asked Ran, perking up. Makoto shook his head. The twins booed in chorus.

“This is something I would like to do on my own,” he said gently as he tugged on his jacket, then passed through the front door without another sound.

* * *

The Swimming Club was some twenty minutes away so Makoto went on foot, shivering in the evening wind, and feeling colder yet when he saw how pitiful the building looked, its sides already torn open by heavy machinery that were parked side by side their defenseless prey. The solitary demise of the once happy structure rendered him speechless and still. Did Haru really swim here when he was younger? Makoto could not be sure, but something deep inside told him he did. _Was Haru happy here?_ Those swimming lessons seemed like they were ages ago…

“Hurts, right?”

Makoto reeled around as an older voice called out to him not too far away. His eyes fell on a pizza delivery scooter, its driver staring up at the Swimming Club with his helmet still strapped into place.

“It’s not easy to watch your memories being destroyed. Were you a member of this club? Well, you can’t go against the times. It’s sad,” mused the man uninterrupted while Makoto searched for an appropriate response.

“I wasn’t a member of the Swimming Club myself,” he said at last to be truthful, “but I did learn how to swim here, and I think my friend used to come here a long time ago.”

“Did he? I was a coach here once,” replied the man. “They called me Coach ‘Demon’ Sasabe. What’s your friend’s name? I might have known him.”

“Haru.. Nanase Haruka.”

“Oh, Haruka!” laughed the man. “Ah, I remember him. He used to come all the time when he was younger. He had quite a group forming around him while he was still in grade school. Do you know the others, too? Rin and the rest?”

“I think some of them go to our school,” replied Makoto, feeling a little more at ease. “I’ve never spoken to the first-years who now run the swim club at school with Haru, but I’ve seen them around. One is short and blond, and the other has blue hair and wears glasses.”

“That’s them, Hazuki Nagisa and Ryuugazaki Rei. Ha ha, Rei was my favorite. I had never seen a kid before who sank to the bottom of the pool like a brick whenever he was swimming anything except butterfly. Butterfly, of all things! An advanced stroke, he wasn’t going to start that until later, but that was what I ended up having to teach him so he could stay afloat at all. I bet it’s still the only stroke he swims. And Nagisa, he was tiny compared to them, but the biggest braggart you’ve ever seen! You couldn’t shut him up once he got going! A good kid, though. He worked his butt off trying to keep up with them. Do you know Rin, too? Matsuoka Rin? He and Haruka were great rivals.”

“No… I guess he doesn’t go to Iwatobi High School with everyone else.”

“From what I’ve heard, he’s come back from Australia, and goes to school somewhere around here. He went to study abroad when he was twelve, and I’ve only seen him once since then, later that year. Has Haruka never mentioned it? I was closing down this place for the end of the year when they showed up that one time. Apparently, they ran into each other while Rin was back home for the winter.”

“You said they were rivals… did they have a race, then?”

“Haruka hasn’t talked about it at all, huh? It must be a painful memory. They did race, and Haruka won easily. Rin was pretty upset about it. Can’t blame him. He went to a swimming school abroad and it didn’t make a difference… He was so distraught, he said he was going to quit swimming for good. That was the last time I’ve seen either of them swim. Haruka quit the club soon afterwards, and he hasn’t attended any tournaments since.”

Makoto fell silent, his shoulders hunched under the weight of Sasabe’s words. Was that why they didn’t form a swim club at school until now, when the pool was right there all along? Did the others even know what happened, and how it might have affected Haru? Would it make a difference now that they were going to swim again? What if they ended up running into Rin at tournaments?

_What then? Will you be alright, Haru…?_

“Is something wrong?” asked Sasabe. Tachibana lifted his head and turned back to him, forcing a light smile.

“No… It was nice meeting you. I’m Makoto by the way, Tachibana Makoto.”

“Nice talking to you, Makoto. Tell those boys to take good care of themselves. And to practice hard! They are talented kids. Doesn’t make sense to let that talent go to waste.”

“I will. Goodbye.”

“Goodbye,” said Sasabe, and a minute later, he and his pizza delivery scooter disappeared around the corner. Makoto was now free to go, but he stood there a moment longer, turning his head to look at that sad, crumbling building one more time. He no longer saw some distant relic of his past, but a place where Haru used to be happy, until another boy lashed out and clawed him in the heart.

 _Is that why you push everyone away, Haru..?_ thought Makoto with a sharp pang in his chest, and locked within the walls of his small bathroom, Haruka’s heart gave a sudden, painful leap. He lowered his head and curled his fingers to give the smiling dolphin figure in his tub a flick on the nose, and lying in bed at his newly assigned Samezuka dorm room, Rin’s face twitched as though he had been stung.

Captain Mikoshiba’s conquest had been successful. When he stated his terms, including the room Matsuoka was expected to share with another member at the “swimmers only” dorm, Rin pleasantly surprised him by silent acceptance of every condition laid before him, perfectly ready now to start training in earnest, to put the memory of Nanase Haruka behind him once and for all.

* * *

Makoto decided to keep his discovery to himself, letting Haru continue what his friend supposed was self-healing in the form of heading over to the pool every day, to finish up so the club could finally open its doors. Everyone was still busy cleaning up the changing rooms and doing some last-minute sweeping of the pool’s bottom, but on Friday morning, Haruka received his invitation from Amakata-sensei to come to the pool after school (and _only_ then) for the private opening ceremony of the Iwatobi Swim Club.

Having grown quite used to talking by now, he graciously shared the news with Tachibana.

“Is everything ready, then?” asked the guy, smiling widely. Haruka hummed. “Will there be a grand opening?”

“No,” replied Haru, recalling his advisor’s words. “Just the five of us after school.”

“I see. Haru..”

“Hm?”

“Congratulations!” said Tachibana, flashing him one of those warm, affectionate smiles. Haruka paused, unsure if he felt accomplished so much as tired and impatient to get in the water that still wasn’t there. The thought pulled his mouth into a frown.

“Maybe they will fill the pool for the occasion… though it would still be too cold to swim,” mused Tachibana as though he could guess Haru’s thoughts, causing him to color and turn his head. Tachibana laughed. Haruka had been turning his head quite often these days, and sometimes wondered if Tachibana could see through him the way he could decipher poetry, casually reading between the flat lines of his eyebrows or the corners of his lips.

When it was finally time for Haruka to leave, he stayed behind just a moment longer, letting everyone else hurry home for the weekend. It was easier that way.

“Tachibana,” he said to the guy, still refusing to call him Makoto out of stubborn hope that somehow they might eventually revert to last name basis, the way guys with girly names ought to properly call one another.

“Yes, Haru?”

His chances were almost in the negatives at this point, however. Haru pursed his lips.

“I won’t need the rubber gloves anymore,” he said quietly, pointing to Tachibana’s desk. The other looked up at him with his eyebrows slightly raised, but then broke into a smile that told Haruka he was understood and his intentions appreciated.

“Good. I’m glad,” replied Tachibana in a soothing voice. At his words, tension slowly left Haruka’s shoulders, his arms hanging loosely by his sides. “Now hurry up, or you’ll be late for the ceremony! I’ll see you on Monday.”

Haruka nodded, pulling his backpack over his shoulder on his way to the door.

“And Haru..!”

He skidded to a halt in the doorway, glancing back with a small frown. Tachibana cocked his head again.

“Have a good weekend!”

Haruka’s lips twitched and he stared back at him, no longer looking quite so annoyed. He hummed and a moment later he was gone, running for the pool as Tachibana gathered his things to head up to the roof.

* * *

Fifteen minutes later, Amakata Miho handed out drinks to the four of them gathering around her: Haruka, Nagisa, Rei, and Kou. Once everyone received their plastic cups full of ice tea, they raised them to the sky with excited smiles, or in Haru’s case, something resembling anticipation.

“Okay. Here’s to the establishment of the new swim club!” said Amakata-sensei as they clinked their cups together.

“Cheers!” said everyone, even Haru in a quiet voice before he took a sip of tea.

“It’s not warm enough to start swimming,” explained Amakata-sensei with a gesture towards the pool, “but we filled the pool as a test run.”

Haruka dared not look before, more inclined to listen to his mother’s pessimism than Tachibana’s gentle optimism, but the moment Amakata-sensei gave him reason to turn his head, his eyes sparked at the serene rippling of the surface, what was undeniably clear, gorgeous water. _How did Tachibana know…?_

“All that’s left is to toss these in together,” continued their advisor, handing out one purifying tablet per person so they could gather by the sides of the pool, throwing or flicking their respective tablets into the water.

“There!” cried Nagisa, turning to Rei with a grin. “The swim club is finally ready to go!”

“The pool looks so beautiful now…” sighed Rei with a content smile. “Even if the temperature is not optimal yet for sw—aaAAHH, H-Haruka-senpai! What are you doing?!”

With no one around to pay attention to him at all times in the presence of water, Haru had since begun tossing his clothes aside. Kou’s eyes widened as nothing remained but bare skin and a swimsuit (for pessimism be damned, there was still a glimmer of hope within Haruka), her hands clasped together in delight.

“I can’t get enough of those triceps!” she sighed, completely absorbed in the view. Rei glared at her in stern disapproval, but whatever he tried to say was drowned out in a splash as Haru dove in, draping himself across the surface like one would roll onto smooth, soft grass.

“Haruka-senpai, the temperature is not optimal!” Rei shouted in vain.

“Oh dear,” said Nagisa, sounding no more worried than if Haruka had simply stuck his hand into the water instead of diving in. “I don’t see a problem, though. He looks comfortable enough.”

“Hah. That’s true…” spoke Kou, looking amused until she studied him a little more carefully. “Wait! His lips are turning purple!”

“Haruka-senpai, as vice-captain I must insist you _leave the pool at once!!_ ” shrieked Rei, to which Haru merely turned to his stomach and slithered further inward.

“Go, Haru-chan!” Nagisa spurred him, laughing harder when Kou ran off and reappeared with a cleaning net, which proved no help in fishing Haruka out of the water. Some distance away, stuck helplessly on the roof, Tachibana too was completely exasperated by their futile attempts to catch the renegade swimmer.

“Haruuu, what are you doing?!” he cried over the railing, quite forgetting that nobody could hear him over there and anyone might hear him on the roof. “Get out of the pool, it’s too cold to swim in April! And what are you all standing around for, get him out of there already! Augh.. he’s going to catch a cold… _Haruuu..!!_ ”

 

**_TO BE CONTINUED…_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 


	11. EPISODE 3: Powerful Dolphin Kick! - Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haruka stayed in the pool for almost ten minutes, continuously pleaded by Rei and egged on by Nagisa until Amakata-sensei had enough, and threatened Haru with so much classical literature homework he would have to skip practice for the rest of the year. Rei and Nagisa immediately joined forces to warn Haruka against defying their ironfisted advisor, so the captain finally yielded, less alarmed by the thought of having to make up wild interpretations about the color green than by the idea that, should he catch cold, Tachibana would fret over his recklessness for the entirety of next week. He hadn’t been sick yet and thus had no experience to support his fears, but he was absolutely certain it would be so, and wanted to avoid being fussed over by the guy at all costs. He hurried out of the pool and over to the renovated showers, which were put to their proper use for the first time in years, dousing Haru with warm water to counteract immersing himself in a cold pool for longer than his swim club deemed good for him.

Unfortunately for Haruka, warm water alone wasn’t enough, not nearly enough for someone with a history of pneumonia at age twelve, which nearly ruined his health and their chances of swimming a relay before Rin left for Australia. Towards the end of January, he made the foolish mistake of trying to retrieve a classmate’s scarf that had fallen into the river, and when he slipped on the bank and tumbled in, everyone froze from shock, wasting precious minutes as they stood there not knowing what to do. Haruka lay at the mercy of the icy water for longer than he could bear without serious consequences. Once he was rescued, he had to be taken to hospital, where he spent two weeks constantly reprimanded for his lethal thoughtlessness. _You’re supposed to be a genius, Haru-chan, so why would you do something this stupid?! What possessed you?!_ his mother scolded him in tears at the hospital, as if performing well on tests was the same as caving in and doing what seemed to be expected of you, even if you would have rather given it up. Haruka turned his head away from her then, and the memory of his mother’s voice made him turn his head the same way on Saturday morning, struggling with a 39°C fever that drenched his body in cold sweat and made him toss restlessly in bed all day. He had just enough strength to get himself water to drink, cook some plain rice he had no stomach to eat, and soak in the tub for hours, in search of comfort that was gone the moment he crawled out and toweled himself dry. His parents called unexpectedly that afternoon and Haru told them he had just been taking a nap, struggling to hold back his sneezes lest he give himself away. They talked a while, but his mother hung up unsuspecting, or so Haru wished to believe, if only to lessen his worries. Once he ended the call, he was left alone with the heavy realization that should his sickness be severe and last long, he would waste Nagisa and Rei’s efforts in more ways than one. Worse, he was going to miss class. _Tachibana will be worried sick._ Having known each other for almost a month, Monday would have been the first time they would be apart on a school day. Tachibana talked to no one else now, _not unless they spoke to him first, anyway…_

Haru shook his head. The guy was sixteen years old and Haruka had never known anyone as capable and enduring as Tachibana. He could take care of himself for a few days, and it wasn’t as though Haru couldn’t do without him…

* * *

Sunday was just as dreary as Saturday. Haruka’s fever didn’t budge, but his willingness to do anything about it gradually dwindled into nothing. When Nagisa and Rei paid him a visit in the afternoon, unannounced as always, Haru opened the door in nothing but a shirt and shorts, then crawled back into his blanket nest in the living room as soon as Nagisa and Rei stepped inside. The two offered their services at once – “Does he need medicine?” “He should drink some tea!” “Let’s get him soup!” –, but Haruka resisted, telling them that the biggest favor they could do for him was to go home and let him rest. On this point, however, the two parties never saw eye to eye, so Nagisa left for the kitchen to make tea, while Rei suggested a variety of medications Haru didn’t care for, having trusted in natural remedies all his life. His shivering and sneezes left Rei unconvinced of the healing power of honey and ginger tea, however.

“Hhh… Kshh!”

“That was loud,” noted Nagisa, helping himself to some of the tea he had just made. Rei stared intently at Haruka, waiting for him to get a tissue, but Haru proved too lazy to stand up and look for some. The way he snorted and rubbed his nose with the back of his hand made Rei’s skin crawl.

“Are you going to be alright, Haruka-senpai…?” he asked as he fixed his eyes on a vase at random, looking convinced that the answer would be, could _only_ be no. Haru made a face.

“It’s nothing. My late grandma used to say that you sneeze when someone else is talking about you,” he said, rubbing his nose vigorously with a finger.

“It must be Rin-chan!” said Nagisa. Haruka stared up at him.

“I am certain this is mere superstition, so stop encouraging him, Nagisa-kun!” snapped Rei. “Can’t you see he has come down with a debilitating illness?”

“Stop patronizing m-hhHH KSHH!”

“You are _ill,_ Haruka-senpai, don’t even try to argue with someone who can clearly tell the symptoms of a common cold!” harped Rei, folding his arms over his chest. Haru tensed under the blankets. Would he have to put up with the same thing tomorrow…?

“I’m fine,” he insisted, drawing the covers just a bit tighter around himself. “I’ll be well enough by Monday.”

“I don’t know, Haru-chan,” said Nagisa, taking another sip of tea. “I think you should take it easy and rest until your fever is gone. It might be a day or two, or even a whole week, but that can’t be helped. You can’t rush these things, you know..”

“I’m not staying the whole week, I c-khh… KSHHH!!”

“Yes you are, Haruka-senpai, if that’s what it takes to regain your health! As vice-captain, I insist you take time off to rest and recover.”

“As captain, _I_ will decide what to do,” said Haru, turning his head archly.

“What if we promise to go to your class and bring back notes for you?” offered Nagisa.

“Forget it,” said Haruka a little too quickly, dreading the idea of Nagisa and Rei needlessly bothering or worrying Tachibana… or water forbid, bringing him back here to see Haruka pathetic and alone, lying helplessly in bed like a baby.

“Come on, Haru-chan… we won’t look for your friend, we’ll just ask someone at random!”

“No need.”

“Will your friend get notes for you, then?” asked Nagisa. Haru bit his lip and bit it hard. Nagisa cracked a smirk. “You know, Haru-chan, we could just tickle the information out of you right now…”

“I feel conflicted taking advantage of an invalid, Nagisa-kun…” muttered Rei. Haruka sighed.

“Fine, I’ll stay home until I feel better, so enough, already.”

Nagisa and Rei exchanged glances, and the compromise was silently accepted. Haruka had never seemed worried about attendance, or been enthusiastic about any subject he had ever taken, so there was little reason to suppose he wouldn’t stay at home when he had a legitimate excuse to do so.

“Oh, by the way, Haru-chan, we heard from Kou-chan that Rin-chan joined the Samezuka swim team,” said Nagisa, finally bringing up the subject that had brought him and Rei to Haruka’s house in the first place. Kou received the good news that very afternoon from Mikoshiba Seijuurou himself, whose enthusiastic e-mail was accepted with great cordiality, except on one point. Fueled by her relative success with Rei and Nagisa, Kou put her foot down and insisted the captain never use ‘Gou’ and ‘kun’ together ever again. She then texted Nagisa and Rei on Saturday after a reasonably long wait that brought nothing from the older brother in question, not even a reply to her cautious messages. Seijuurou at least had done her the favor of hitting a search engine to better understand her request, then promptly slapped himself in the face for having inadvertently done the young lady an injurious disservice. His next e-mail read, typed in great haste, _Terribly sorry, Gou-san!! Please tell me if there is anything I can do for you! I am at your service!! Yours, S._

“We figured that if Rin-senpai has joined, it is probable that he would eventually enter tournaments on behalf of Samezuka Academy,” added Rei.

“Yup! So we should enter tournaments, too!” said Nagisa, grinning widely. “Then we can do relays again...!”

“I only swim free,” replied Haruka, cocooning himself just a bit more.

“What does that even mean, Haru-chan? Does that mean you can’t swim relays?” whined Nagisa, flopping down by Haru’s blanket-wrapped body to press his head against the other’s back. “Don’t say that! Come on…”

“Besides, we can’t swim a relay with three people,” said Haru as Nagisa kept nudging him like a little billy goat.

“That’s true, Nagisa-kun… I’m afraid we are one person short of _any_ relay…” said Rei in a small voice. Nagisa lifted his head, eyes wide in horror.

“Does that mean we have to find one more member?!”

“Seems so.”

“Haru-chan, ask your friend to join!” pleaded Nagisa, but Haru merely shook his head, drawing a growl from Rei.

“Haruka-senpai, why are you so stubborn about this? We are not exactly overrun with willing candidates! Have you even asked anyone from your class?!”

“Do it for the team, Haru-chan!”

“ _For the Team_ was Rin’s motto, not mine,” said Haruka, turning his head sharply away from them.

“You are **_impossible_** , Haruka-senpai!!” screeched Rei, tearing at his hair, and Haru decided then and there _never_ to ask Tachibana just for being so needlessly harangued on his sickbed by the obnoxious vice-captain and his loudmouth treasurer.

* * *

Nagisa and Rei left shortly after to let Haruka get himself something to eat and then go back to resting, and with an hour-long detour to the bathtub, he proceeded to do just that. His fever raged on relentlessly, every inch of him worn to the bone by the sudden visit, which brought nothing but irritation and dubious news about Rin. It was to be expected. Haruka knew what he had signed up for, but even thinking of getting involved with Rin again was enough to exhaust him completely. He was fast asleep by nine, not wanting to think of how Tachibana would feel tomorrow morning upon realizing he would have to manage without Haru for the rest of the day. _He can take care of himself for just one day_ , fumed Haru under his blankets. _I’m not his keeper…_

He woke up early enough for a normal day, but ridiculously early for a sick day that left him lying on his futon for several hours, with nothing to do except pray for his fever to go away. It was parked at 38.7°C and refused to budge, leaving his joints stiff with discomfort that no amount of recreational bathing could wash away. When Haru could finally will himself to move, he lurched into the kitchen to eat yesterday’s cold rice, unable to stop wondering what Tachibana had for lunch, if he brought onigiri or fried squid wrapped in newspaper from some friendly old lady he sometimes passed on his way from home (though where that was, he never said, and Haru made a point never to ask him.) He wished uselessly for anything but cold rice and empty silence, and when he thought of how he had never minded silence so much before, Haru had to conclude with no small amount of bitterness that Tachibana had quite spoiled him with his easy conversation and pleasant smiles.

After lunch, Haruka spent six slow-dragging hours in uneasy half-sleep and lucid dreams, squirming under his covers until a particularly nasty sequence startled him awake. By the time he pinched himself, he could no longer recall what his nightmare was, but the way it clutched and wrenched his heart was more than enough to convince Haruka that he had stayed at home long enough. He got off the futon, forced down the rest of the rice for dinner and packed his schoolbag, taking a long bath before he crawled upstairs to lie down in his own bed for the first time in three days. There was no more food at home and all his efforts to rest were useless. He would rather go to school and endure Tachibana than… _than this_. He almost looked forward to sitting behind his desk being yelled at by teachers and fussed over by the guy in that warm voice, which always sounded like it was half asleep, so low and soft it could have put Haruka to sleep. When Haru closed his eyes, he could sometimes conjure up that voice and pull it on like a puppet, holding one-sided conversations in his mind. He pressed his hot cheek to the pillow, shivering without his blankets but too tired to fetch them. What would Tachibana say if he saw him now?

_Good evening, Haru. You’re sick? You shouldn’t have gone into the pool in April, didn’t I tell you the water would be too cold? I hope you won’t do that again. It’s lonely in class without you.. There’s no one I can talk to. Please get well soon, Haru.. …It’s mochi. I’m not sure if you like sweet things, but.. You don’t have to give me anything in return.. . have a good weekend.. Haru. . . ._

* * *

_Haru.. . Haru, you’ll be late for class…_

_..Haru!_

Haruka gasped awake and checked his alarm clock, only to drop it back onto the nightstand with a groan. It was almost eleven in the morning. Classes had long begun, and by the time he would get there, it would be lunch break so he might as well wait until it was time for sixth period, but going through all that trouble for just one class sounded so asinine it made him give up before he could even begin to consider the possibilities. To think he even packed his schoolbag but forgot to set an alarm… _It’s Tachibana’s fault,_ he thought with a scowl. It was his stupid voice that put Haruka to sleep and made him miss a whole day of classes. His fever begged to differ as the bigger culprit, but Haruka stubbornly refused to acknowledge it even as it threatened to climb higher again, for what upset him beyond all reason was that his sleep had been sound and mostly dreamless. That voice somehow lulled him into the deepest chasms of his unconsciousness and flicked him off like a switch. Sitting up in bed wide awake, Haruka felt better rested despite his illness than he had in days, even weeks.

Now his meager energies were in danger of being wasted, but Haruka resisted. He took a bath, then checked his cupboards, finding one last tin of pineapple in juice that soon joined a small tail end of mackerel on the grill plate. Mackerel never failed him, so he ate with more enthusiasm than the day before, but once he was full and lay down, he was tackled again by fever, burning so intensely it shackled Haruka to his futon. He spent the rest of the day unbearably conscious of his misery, regretting to the last moment he hadn’t set an alarm and went to school like he had planned. Tachibana would be unbearable tomorrow… unless he too had been seized by something while Haruka wasn’t there. Haru pursed his lips. _He had better be there._

He had no strength to go upstairs and fetch his alarm clock before fatigue claimed him for the night, but by some kind gesture of fate, Haru woke up earlier than he usually would for school, and accepted this as a good omen. He took a long bath, then hurried to scrape together some leftovers for an unappealing but sufficient lunch, stuffing the twin bentos into his backpack that seemed to be full and waiting for him – holding yesterday’s books. Haru sighed and emptied it, repacking with the current course load and tugging on his uniform. His fever clocked at 37.9°C, a slight difference Haruka ignored as best he could. It didn’t seem to interfere with his bicycle ride to school, at any rate. If anything, the cool breeze soothed his burning skin.

When he entered the classroom, Tachibana whipped up his head to stare at him in surprise and what appeared to be genuine relief, never taking his eyes off Haruka, who now shuffled towards his seat with small, measured steps. Neighboring classmates asked if he was alright, and he told them he was fine, trying not to stare back at Tachibana as he walked over and sank into his chair in the corner. He expected obnoxious cheerfulness, but the other’s features slowly darkened in concern. Was his condition really showing that much..?

“You’re sick, aren’t you, Haru?” Tachibana said in a strange, quivering voice, those upturned eyebrows creasing so pitifully it made Haru turn his head.

“I’m fine.”

“I hope you are,” said Tachibana, still unable to take his eyes off Haruka. “You don’t look well at all. You’re very pale, Haru..”

“Stop worrying so much,” muttered Haru, his ears red but his cheeks as white as parchment. “Class is about to start, and I told you, I’m fine.”

 _I’m fine_ , he told himself too as he was slowly coming down with fever-induced dizziness. _I’m fine_ , he insisted as the lines of his textbook blurred beyond legibility. _I’m fine_ , he pleaded as he tried to prop his head up… and said no more when his arms finally slipped and Haru collapsed on his desk, unaware that Tachibana was shaking him, _Haru.. **Haruka…!**_

* * *

“He’s still not awake.. is anyone coming for him?”

“His records say his parents work abroad, and he has no other relations listed.”

“…I volunteer to take him home, Sensei. I just need his address.”

“It’s a long way on foot, Tachibana-kun. It would be too much for you to take him on your own like that. If your homeroom teacher volunteers to drive you, I will allow it.”

“Eh? But I teach class in half an hour..!”

“Please, Ama-chan-sensei…”

 _Stop talking… let me sleep,_ rebelled some spark of consciousness inside Haruka, buried deep within a dark, heavy space where he lay blind and seized by entropy as those blurry voices talked over him. They didn’t listen, but eventually they stopped of their own accord and Haru sank deeper, feeling nothing when his limp, sleeping form was carefully lifted into his friend’s arms. Makoto cradled him to his chest and carried him out of the nurse’s office, all the way to Ama-chan-sensei’s tiny pink car, setting Haru down gingerly on one side and slipping in on the other to keep the poor sufferer in place.

Even though she had promised to drive them all the way to Haruka’s house, Amakata Miho had no choice but to stop near the foot of the stone stairs, where no readily traversable roads led upwards. To anyone smaller than Haruka himself, it would have been a near-impossible quest to carry his unconscious body up so many stairs, but being a good deal larger and used to a pair of siblings, whose favorite pastime was clinging to his biceps as he spun them round and round, Makoto considered the task little more than a necessary inconvenience.

“Well, here we are,” said their teacher with a smile. “Are you sure you can take it from here, Tachibana-kun?”

Makoto nodded, his tongue peeking out slightly as he searched Haruka’s backpack for his keys.

“Of course. Thank you very much,” he replied the moment he found and pocketed his object, strapping Haruka’s backpack onto his chest before lifting out his friend, who ended up draped over Makoto’s shoulders. Amakata-sensei waved to them and sped off, no doubt trying to make it back to class on time. As for Makoto, he now began his slow but steady climb, stopping only to catch his breath under Haruka’s weight.

There were only two keys that qualified for the front door. When the first one clicked immediately, the door was pulled open just enough for Makoto to sneak their bulk through the entrance, soon finding himself in a living room littered with cups, tissues, and the ruins of Haruka’s blanket mound that seemed less inviting the more Makoto looked at it. He sighed and began carrying his cargo around, trying to find a better place to set Haru down. Once he exhausted all possibilities on the ground floor, Makoto hauled him upstairs, where he finally found Haruka’s bedroom. Its owner was soon laid on the bed, his tie, jacket and shoes gingerly removed to make him more comfortable. _At least the air is better here than it was downstairs_ , thought Makoto, who set down the backpacks and took off his own larger jacket to drape it over Haruka’s thin frame.

Determined to be of service, Makoto hurried downstairs, where he opened some windows and the terrace door to make a breeze. All used tissues in sight were bagged, to be carried into the outdoor trashcan he passed on the way inside, and when he returned, he gathered all dirty cups and dishes into the sink, dousing them in hot water to let them soak. After some hesitation, Makoto also decided to take an inventory of his friend’s stocks, upon which he discovered there was virtually no food in the fridge or the cupboards. He sighed and quickly scribbled a message onto a slip of paper, placing it on the living room table.

_I’ll be back soon. —Makoto_

He ran all the way home and back, having reluctantly taken Haruka’s keys, but he needn’t have worried so much. When he returned, the paper was still there and Haru was sleeping soundly upstairs, shivering just a bit. Makoto adjusted his jacket on Haruka’s shoulders, then hurried down again to check the futon in the living room. After a brief assessment of their cleanliness, he picked the two nicest blankets to stay, taking the rest to the washing machine. A quick search yielded clean sheets elsewhere that went to replace the one on the futon, now serviceable again with a blanket to spare. Makoto’s jacket was soon switched for the extra blanket, carefully tucked around Haru to keep him warm, and once Makoto washed all the dishes and exhausted his usefulness for the present, he settled down on the floor to start on his homework.

* * *

It was past five in the afternoon when Haruka began to stir, opening his eyes and screwing them shut the moment they fell upon Tachibana, who appeared to be lying on the bedroom floor absorbed in a text book. Haru allowed himself a small peek, still hoping it was just a dream, but when the apparition made audible, discernible noise scribbling something with a pen, Haruka finally shot him a glare.

“Oi,” he said, his eyes narrow. “What are you doing here?”

“Ah, you’re awake,” said Tachibana, leaving his text book behind to come and sit on the floor by Haruka’s bed. “You scared us, Haru.. You passed out during forth period, so we took you home.”

“ _…We?_ ” asked Haru wide-eyed, expecting the worst.

“Ama-chan-sensei agreed to drive us both,” explained Tachibana and Haru sighed, all too glad Nagisa and Rei weren’t involved. “I promised I would stay with you, so here I am.”

“You didn’t have to,” said Haru, nestling deeper into his blanket in embarrassment. “I’m fine.”

“You’ve been saying that all morning,” groaned Tachibana, shooting him a look. “Coming to school with a fever… why would you do that, Haru..?”

“I felt fine this morning,” Haru lied through his teeth. No wonder he slipped up over the phone. Tachibana sounded just like his mother now.

“You could have stayed at home until you felt better,” scolded the mother hen, but his voice grew softer with every word. “I took notes and was going to give them to you when you were finally back,” he added, reaching for his backpack to dig out and hold up a neat stack of individual sheets with material and home assignments noted for each class. Haru rolled his eyes.

“I mean, I was very glad to see you,” said Tachibana as he set down the notes and scooted back, “..but I’d rather you stayed home where you could rest properly.”

Haru’s eyes widened, but he quickly turned his head, making a face.

“I had enough of resting at home,” he said sharply.

“I suppose it _is_ pretty lonely…” risked Tachibana in a tender tone that made Haruka turn back, their eyes meeting again. “I know it’s only been two days, but it was really quiet without you, Haru.”

“You mean _you_ were quiet,” muttered Haru. Tachibana laughed in response, his smile so bright it lit up the whole room.

“True..” he said, scratching his cheek with a finger. Haruka squinted at him. “Oh well. It won’t be for long.”

“I’ll be fine tomorrow,” said Haru, his fingers idly wringing the blanket.

“You’ve been excused for the rest of the week,” Tachibana informed him with an apologetic look. “The nurse examined you and said you needed at least three more days. It’ll be the weekend by then.”

“Fine. You’ve gotten rid of me,” said Haru archly, rolling over to turn his back on Tachibana. The guy laughed again. Did he laugh just the same for everybody..?

“Haru…”

Haruka opened one eye to peer back at him. Tachibana flashed him a smile.

“What if I came by every day after school until you felt better? I have to bring you class notes anyway, and then you wouldn’t have to be by yourself all day. I can stay as little or as long as you like. I don’t mind, Haru.”

Haru’s brow twitched, his face scrunched up for a moment. Did he want Tachibana to come? Wasn’t it grand to just lie here in absolute silence for entire days without him…?

“Do what you want,” he ended up saying, glaring down the wall by his bed. “But don’t expect me to entertain you. I’m _not well_.”

“Of course not,” replied Tachibana. Haru could almost hear him grin. _What was so funny?_ “You just rest, Haru.”

Haruka sighed, slowly turning back to him. “What time is it?”

Makoto checked his watch. “Five twenty-eight.”

“You’ve been here since fourth period..?”

“Fifth period, technically.”

“Isn’t your family worried?” asked Haruka, quirking a brow. Tachibana gave him a soothing smile.

“I left them a message to let them know I might be late. I also brought you lunch. Well… dinner by now, I guess.”

Haru’s eyes widened again. “You didn’t have to…” he muttered, rolling his head back.

“It’s alright. We had plenty, so nobody’s going to miss it. Is rice and squid okay? You seem to like mackerel best, but I couldn’t find any—”

“Rice and squid are fine,” said Haru, his cheeks coloring. He sighed and slowly sat up in bed, finally noticing his jacket and tie had been draped neatly over the back of his chair. “I’ll eat some now.”

“Alright,” replied Tachibana, gathering his schoolbag and coursework to follow him downstairs, where Haruka stopped abruptly in the kitchen doorway. On the counter, he found two containers of cooked food sitting beside several packets, tins, bottles, and a large box of tissues he didn’t remember buying.

“What are those..?” he pointed at them, eyeing the other in suspicion. Tachibana shrugged, then broke into a sheepish smile.

“I thought you could use more of everything until you were well enough, so I brought some things..” he admitted, drawing another bewildered look from Haruka. “That way you won’t have to go out to buy groceries. It’s a long way down to the stores, it would be really tiring to climb all those stairs when you’re not feeling well.”

“You worry too much,” sighed Haruka, his voice thick. He lowered his head. “I’ll heat up the food.”

“Need any help? Not that I’m a cook or anything, but if there’s anything—”

“It’s fine. You should go home now,” said Haru, tying on his grandmother’s tattered old apron. “I can take care of myself.”

“Are you sure you’ll be okay? Your fever was really high…” replied Tachibana, who lifted a hand instinctively to press his fingers against Haru’s forehead. Haruka tensed and glared at him, brushing his hand away.

“I said I was fine. Go home,” he said, his pout so childish it made Tachibana grin. “And stop laughing at everything. You’re annoying.”

“Says the guy who turns his head every minute,” teased Tachibana. Haru shot him a look of betrayal so acute it nearly made him laugh in earnest. “Not that I mind…”

“ _Good bye,_ ” said Haru pointedly, spooning cold rice into the pan so he wouldn’t have to look at Tachibana again. He could already feel his ears turn red, but just hearing the guy hum knowingly made them color more.

“Good night, Haru,” came the good-natured reply. The door soon closed behind Tachibana, who had turned the keys, placed them on the entrance hall counter, and let himself out for the third time that day, leaving Haru to wonder what was burning worse: his rice and squid in the pan, or his flushed cheeks at 38.2°C.

* * *

Haru laid down right after dinner, and after a night of heavy sweating under his blanket, he woke up the next morning with no more than a temperature of 37.8°C and the fatigue of having lain in bed too much in the past few days. No crippling headaches followed him as he left for the bathroom, and once he took a bath, he felt well enough to change into a shirt and sweatpants instead of staying in his pajamas. He loaded them into the washing machine along with the blankets and sheets Tachibana left for him in the wash room, made his bed, then cleaned up the dishes from last night, taking out the rest of the rice and squid to heat up for lunch. He even checked Tachibana’s notes about class work, marking everything in his course books to do in the afternoon. It was no use starting on it now, when Tachibana might come and interrupt him any minute.

And come he did, not long after sixth period. He arrived with a new set of notes and a small container of mochi that Haru reluctantly accepted, allowing Tachibana to sit down by the table so they could share it. As they ate, Tachibana filled him in on everything he missed while Haru listened in silence, humming or nodding as the other went on. It was the same gentle stream of recent weeks, that easy flow of conversation Haruka had grown quite used to, feeling strangely comfortable as Tachibana went on. Before he knew it, he and the guy were sitting close and poring over the notes the other had written, Haru asking questions and Tachibana patiently explaining everything to the smallest detail. As they continued to decipher the notes together, more and more of Tachibana’s course books ended up on the table, until it became so crowded the empty container was forced to make way. Ten more minutes and the two of them were doing homework side by side, Tachibana preparing for Friday while Haruka was still catching up on Monday. They still sat close, but not uncomfortably so. They were silent now, but it was a casual, tolerable silence. _Nagisa and Rei could never be this quiet,_ Haru thought to himself whenever he glanced over to Tachibana, who was erasing typos from his English homework, then perusing biology diagrams with his lips moving slightly as he went. Haruka sighed and turned his head away, forcing his attention back to geography and history. Afternoon turned into evening by the time they finished, at which point Haru sent the guy home, too tired to cook a proper meal for two, and telling himself with more bitterness yet that he had imposed on Tachibana long enough.

The next day, Haru felt a little better again. He washed the rest of his clothes, wiped down the counters, then took out the trash, and come lunch time, he made tea and prepared the packet of ramen he was brought on Wednesday. Tachibana soon turned up as expected, having brought a bar of chocolate that Haruka didn’t really care for, but tried a small piece of just to be polite. Tachibana ate the rest over homework, or rather within five minutes of starting coursework if it even lasted that long.

“Shall I come again tomorrow, Haru?” he asked just as he had been dismissed for dinner. Haruka pursed his lips, hesitating longer than before.

“I feel much better,” he said at last, not looking the other in the eye. “You can stay at home with your family.”

“Alright,” replied Tachibana. “Though, just in case… do you have a phone? I’ll give you my number so you can call me if you need anything.”

Haruka paused, then turned his head just slightly.

“That’s okay,” he mumbled, coloring a little. “I’ll be fine.”

Tachibana gave him an amused look, then took out a piece of paper, scribbling his number down and reaching it out for Haru to take, who pinched it up with a small, annoyed frown.

“You don’t have to call me if you don’t want to. It’s for emergencies, then,” said Tachibana, cocking his head to the side. “Okay?”

“Yeah, yeah,” replied Haru, his face deadpan. “Go already, you’ll be late.”

“Haha, alright. Feel better soon, Haru. And have a good weekend,” said the other, his smile still in place. Haruka lowered his head.

“You too,” he said, then closed the door, not knowing what else to tell someone who willingly spent the better part of three days bringing him food and taking care of his workload… or rather _how_ to say it without giving in to the idea that this was slowly and irreversibly becoming a friendship.


	12. EPISODE 3: Powerful Dolphin Kick! - Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  
> 
> This is by far my favorite screencap edit I've done for this story. Enjoy!

Next Monday, Haru returned to school fever-free. The only trace of his illness, besides having lost some weight, was the occasional sneeze, but since Tachibana never seemed to run out of tissues to give him, it wasn’t much of an issue anymore, and Nagisa and Rei were glad to have him back. They soon snagged Haru for lunch again, now pressing the matter of recruitment in earnest, and annoying Haruka to no end with requests to advertise in his class. They themselves had exhausted nearly every possibility. Nagisa even tried to enlist students travelling on the same train, figuring that the ride to school would leave people no choice but to consider his offer, but it was no use. If his peers did not take him seriously, they listened even less to Rei, who insisted that an ideal recruit should have perfect form and learn to swim beautifully, as if speed and skill came second to arching your back and straightening your arms just right for a stunning relay exchange. Even those who might have been interested were alarmed by such high demands, but how many had actually been lost this way, nobody knew. Since Nagisa’s luck ran just as dry, there was no difference between them anymore. As for Haruka, his recruitment records were flawless on account of being non-existent, and he intended to keep it that way. Active recruitment seemed like too much effort. Besides, he had greater problems on his mind, like the fact that it was still early May instead of mid-summer, and just looking at the glistening surface of the water made him sneeze. Haru frowned and rubbed his nose. Before he left class, Tachibana reassured him that the weather would turn warm enough to swim in a few weeks, and Haru could only hope he would be right again.

He might have lingered by the poolside a while longer, but he was startled from his solitary reverie by Nagisa’s cry of “Oh wow…!” coming from inside the changing area. Haruka shuffled over, to find Kou showing Nagisa and Rei an advertisement poster for a local gym, promising a _free environment where you can reinvent yourself at your own pace._

“We can swim here in the off-season?” breathed Nagisa. “Awesome!”

“Isn’t it?” Kou replied cheerfully, holding the poster out for Rei to read as well. “I’m thinking that schools like us without indoor pools probably use facilities like these.”

“Three cheers for Kou-chan, our Super High-School Level Manager!” said Nagisa, grinning from ear to ear. Kou and Rei stared at him pleasantly surprised, then twitched as a shadow draped over them: Haruka finally joining their ranks.

“Haruka-senpai..” blinked Kou, letting Haru take the poster from her.

“How do we pay for it?” he asked immediately.

“With our club budget, of course!”

“Ah, I see,” said Nagisa, evidently convinced.

“Will our budget cover membership for four people, though?” asked Rei, ever the stone-cold realist. “These facilities seem very expensive…”

Haru glared at the ridiculously high prices on the poster. At this rate, Tachibana might lose to his mother, who warned her son that they might have no choice but to work out and jog until the weather turned favorable. Nagisa, however, was an eternal optimist.

“This means we can swim year round!” he cried in joy, clinging to Rei and nearly toppling him over in his enthusiasm. “Let’s go to Ama-chan tomorrow at lunch and get our money! Gym membership, _here we come!_ ”

* * *

“That’s not going to happen,” replied Amakata Miho the next day, frowning at the four of them from her seat at the Faculty Office.

“What? Why?” blurted Nagisa, slouching in defeat.

“The school isn’t going to give that much money to a brand new club with no accomplishments!” explained their advisor, as though financial politics were common sense among-high schoolers. “There is an aphorism from the Bible,” she continued, wagging a finger at her whiny brats. “He who does not work, neither shall he eat.”

“I do not see how that pertains to our situation, when we had worked several hours every day for three weeks…” muttered Rei under his breath, fixing his glasses with a scowl.

“You can’t eat a pool,” moaned Nagisa. Rei tried very hard not to question his priorities, while Kou pursed her lips, lifting her poster up insistently.

“So if we deliver accomplishments, we’ll get the money?”

“I suppose..” nodded Amakata-sensei. “That’s the best way to secure lots of money for your club,” she added, smiling sweetly.

“Accomplishments…” echoed Haruka, who had phased through most of the conversation, but now latched onto a few snippets and began fixating on them in earnest.

“So theoretically, if we entered a summer tournament and placed first…” began Rei.

“Your request might be approved at the second term budget review meeting,” replied Amakata-sensei. The others exchanged hopeful looks. “But you’ll need at least four swimmers to bolster your case.”

“Four swimmers…” repeated Haruka, his hand sneaking to his collar to loosen his tie, which seemed to grow tighter as the gears turned in his head.

“So it’s meaningless if we cannot find another member…” mused Rei, trailing off as they turned their heads towards Haruka, whose hand dropped to his side in a moment of eureka.

“One more… and I can swim all I want!” he said out loud, his face like a hound’s that had caught the scent of blood. Before they could ask him how he had even come to that conclusion, Haruka turned his back on them and left without another word.

“Haru-chan sounds motivated now,” giggled Nagisa, who pulled Rei along to follow him, but by the time they stepped out, Haruka was turning around the corner, his sneakers screeching as he skidded to a halt and changed direction.

They were too late to catch him. In the time it took them to run after him, Haru made another turn and disappeared completely.

* * *

Had they known him better, they might have given up at this point. Haruka’s powers of persuasion were practically unheard of outside of the water, yet he was running at high speed towards his own class, his hand clenching around a spare strap of speedo-clad Iwatobi-chan in his pocket. He entered the classroom and headed straight for the empty teacher’s desk, largely unnoticed until he stopped in front of it and turned to face everyone.

“ _Hey,_ ” he said, louder than his voice had ever been raised in class, at which point all attention had decidedly turned to him. He held out the strap for everyone to see, then simply said, glaring them down, “I’ll give this to anyone who joins the swim club.”

His expression was so intense it stunned the classroom into silence, but slowly everyone turned their heads back towards Tachibana, who threw his hands in the air and cried,

“What is everyone staring at me for?! He asked the entire class!”

The others glanced back and forth between him and Haruka, but after a few rounds that led to no further response from either, they resumed talking and eating as if nothing had happened. If Nanase’s mom didn’t budge, they who had no moral obligations towards him would budge even less, so nobody was paying attention to the captain of the swim club anymore as he stomped back to his desk and sat down in sulky silence. Even Tachibana was avoiding eye contact, but unlike the others, he was soon followed insistently by a pair of sparking blue eyes, until he cracked under the pressure of that hard gaze like an egg.

“Haruuu, why are you looking at me like that..?” he whined, hiding his hot face behind his hand. Haru wasn’t even blinking. “Stop it, it’s creepy..!”

“Are you saying I’m _creepy?_ ” said Haruka, his tone teetering on edge. Makoto lowered his hand to risk a peek at him.

“N-No, of course not..” he mumbled in protest, trying for an apologetic look as his gaze drifted to the strap, which now rested on top of Haruka’s course book. “What is that thing, anyway?” he asked, doing his best to sound interested.

“A strap of Iwatobi-chan.”

“The town mascot? I didn’t know you could get these..”

“You can’t,” replied Haru, pursing his lips. “I made them.”

Tachibana’s jaw dropped.

“ _You made_ that…?” he echoed, now in a genuine display of interest and awe. “That’s amazing..! You’re really talented, Haru.”

Haru clenched his jaw, eyes narrow as he braced himself.

“Tachibana.”

“Eh?” blurted the other. The next moment, Haru grabbed the strap and practically shoved it in the guy’s face.

“I’ll give this to you if you join the swim club,” said Haru, fixing him in a stare again. Tachibana’s lips quivered. His hand slapped across his face in a groan.

“ _Haruuu_ , stop looking at me like that! I can’t join the swim club.”

“Why not?” pressed Haru, dangling Iwatobi-chan an inch from Tachibana’s face.

“Because I’ve already applied to the track team,” confessed the other.

“So?”

“ _So…?_ Haru, I can’t be on two sports teams at once! That would be too much!” protested Tachibana, finally hazarding a look at Haruka, who lowered the strap to set it gently on his desk again. He closed his eyes, donning his most pained expression.

“And I thought you were my friend..”

He paused to squint at Tachibana. His lips twitched. “..Makoto.”

“ _Are you kidding me?!_ ” cried Tachibana, dragging his hand down his face so forcefully it left red marks. “The one time you call me that and you do it to _bully me?!_ ”

“Are you going to join the swim club or not? I need one more member to swim all I want,” said Haru, his eyes boring into Tachibana’s, who now glared back just plain offended.

“ _No,_ I am not. I’m not joining another sports team just to fill your quota, _Nanase-kun_ ,” he replied, even turning his head away to give Haruka a taste of his own medicine. Silence followed and he finally snuck a peek, to find Haru had turned his head too, shoulders tense and arms folded over his chest.

“Fine,” he said, glaring at their reflection in the window.

“Good,” replied Tachibana, his tone acrid.

“ _Fine._ ”

“ _Great!_ ” snapped Tachibana, and they didn’t speak to each other again until sixth period ended and Tachibana grabbed his duffel bag to leave for track, limiting himself to a short _Goodbye_ that was not returned by still-fuming, disappointed Haruka.

* * *

Meanwhile, Nagisa spent his lunch hour with Rei, pinning posters on every bulletin board that didn’t have one yet, and holding up the rest to passersby, but hardly anyone stopped to take a look. Even those who did left shortly after, having found a year’s supply of Iwatobi-chan to be the least successful incentive in the history of school club merchandise. Secretly, Rei agreed with them. Why couldn’t Iwatobi-chan be a butterfly instead? How Nagisa could dismiss his suggestion to make glass and wire butterfly pins instead of wooden straps, he would never know. The idea that Haruka had never handled glass or wire before, but was expected to do all the work himself, always seemed to elude Rei when he set his sight on beauty and beauty alone. It did not help of course that Nagisa was also an avid fan of penguins. The only thing Rei managed to talk him out of was more risqué swimsuits for Iwatobi-chan.

“At this rate we’ll never find a fourth member,” whined Nagisa as he pinned his last poster up by the stairwell.

“To think we have come so close…” sighed Rei.

“I bet Haru-chan never even asked his friend to join…” moaned Nagisa… and the next moment, both twitched as though the same thought had shot right through them.

“Are you thinking what I’m thinking, Nagisa-kun?” spoke Rei, his mouth dry. Nagisa nodded.

“I’m not leaving school today until I find out who Haru-chan’s new friend is! We deserve that much for going through all this trouble!” he said, smacking his palm with a fist.

“But wait, Nagisa-kun… Haruka-senpai has forbidden us from visiting him in class,” said Rei, obviously reluctant to break their promise. Nagisa’s eyes twinkled.

“Oh, but Rei-chan, who ever said we were going to visit _Haru-chan?_ We are visiting his new friend! Haru-chan never did forbid us from _going_ to his classroom, you know…”

“You are diabolical,” whispered Rei, staring at him in terrified awe. The deal was soon sealed. The moment sixth period ended, they would leave class and run all the way to the first second-year classroom, hoping they might be faster than the elusive object of their long-standing curiosity.

* * *

That _Goodbye_ was spoken more softly than their heated exchanges have been, but Haruka refused to take the olive branch and Makoto had no time to plead with him. Ashamed that he had perhaps gotten exasperated over nothing – surely Haru wouldn’t have asked him if he himself didn’t matter at least a little –, Makoto walked down the hallway with his head hanging, promising himself he would help out in any other way except joining the swim club.

He had just left the building, and Haruka entered the bathroom in the hall, when Nagisa and Rei turned around the corner on their way to Class 2-1, all but bursting through the door to the amusement of lingering second-years. They were both out of breath, Nagisa’s shoulders shaking as he gasped for air after having run all the way with a bag full of books.

“Ex-Excuse us…” he panted, trying for a smile.

“We are.. looking for.. an acquaintance of Nanase Haruka-s-senpai…” panted Rei, fixing his glasses to look more presentable.

“Who are you looking for?” asked one of the girls.

“We don’t know the name,” said Nagisa, waving his hand dismissively. “All we know is they are a friend of Haru-chan. Who is it, do you know?”

The girls giggled at ‘Haru-chan.’ The boys laughed even louder.

“Is that a trick question?” asked one of them. “Nanase has no friends.”

“I think they mean Tachibana,” offered one of the girls.

“Tachibana is his mom,” replied another boy and they started laughing again.

“Or his girlfriend!” suggested another guy. “Too bad they broke up over the swim club…!”

By this time, everyone inside was roaring with laughter, and Rei stared at them as though they were the most vicious hooligans he had ever seen.

“Tachibana? Tachibana who?” asked Nagisa, his eyes shimmering as the moment of truth drew nearer.

“Tachibana Makoto,” replied one of the girls. Nagisa and Rei gasped, staring at each other in shock.

“ _A girl…!_ ” they breathed in unison. A moment later, Rei straightened to fix his glasses, folding his arms with a smug smirk.

“I do believe you owe me one thousand yen, Nagisa-kun,” he said, his voice dripping with satisfaction.

“Oh, who cares about that now!” snapped Nagisa, shooting Rei a sharp look before he turned back to the second-years, who now wished to leave, but were detained by the two boys blocking their doorway. “Tell us where we can find Mako-chan!”

One of the boys was now in serious danger of hacking up a lung. Even the girls were wiping tears as they squealed with raw abandon.

“ _Stop laughing, please!!_ ” Rei snapped at them at last, utterly bewildered by their lack of compassion for his senpai and his short-lived romantic affair.

“Yeah, tell us where to find Mako-chan!”

The guy in front of them snorted, but quickly composed himself enough to reply.

“ _Mako-chan_ ’s down at the track field,” he began, smothering his laughter with a cough. Nagisa and Rei stared at him mesmerized. “Just look for olive green hair, big green eyes, and shoulders as wide as the teacher’s desk over there,” he finished in tears. Laughter erupted once again as the two boys stared at each other dumbfounded, obviously getting very conflicting mental images in their heads.

“I beg your pardon?!” stammered Rei, whose mind arrived at an olive and grass green version of Oogami Sakura.

“Tachibana’s a _guy,_ dude,” said one of the boys. “Biggest guy in class. Seriously, you can’t miss him.”

It took a minute to sink in, but when it did, Nagisa and Rei stared at each other as though they had uncovered the Holy Grail, their lips quivering as they whispered reverently,

“ _A guy with a girly name…!_ ”

A moment later, Nagisa cracked a smirk.

“I guess you owe me one thousand yen now, Rei-chan.”

“How can you even think of money at a time like this, Nagisa-kun?!”

“A deal’s a deal!” chirped Nagisa with his sweetest smile.

“ _Fine,_ ” growled Rei as he opened his wallet and pulled out a bill, holding it out with a scowl for Nagisa to greedily snatch from his hand.

“Thank you, Rei-chan..” he cooed affectionately. Rei colored.

As soon as Nagisa tucked away his prize, he took out his phone and mashed in a text message to Kou, urging her to meet them at the track field. No sense leaving their manager out of the fun, after all.

“Now, off we go!” he cried, raising his fist into the air.

“What are you doing here?” came Haruka’s angry voice just inches away from him. Nagisa let out a loud yelp, nearly knocking Rei over in his shock. “Where are you going?”

“We are leaving for the track field, Haruka-senpai…” said Rei as he pushed his glasses back into place, their reflection glaringly white. “We have some unfinished business to attend to,” he added as Nagisa rubbed his hands together with a mischievous grin.

“I forbid it,” protested Haruka as they seized his wrists to drag him off towards the track field. He squirmed, heels digging uselessly into the ground. “Let go of me! _I forbid it!_ ”

* * *

“I can’t believe you never told us you had found the perfect person, Haru-chan,” scolded Nagisa as he and Rei pushed and pulled Haruka towards the gate. Kou soon joined them, having turned back from the street and left a confused Chigusa behind to run all the way to the track field.

“Haruka-senpai..?” she blurted when she saw him practically sandwiched between the two boys, his eyes kept firmly on the ground.

“We’re going to check out our future fourth member, Kou-chan,” said Nagisa.

“Your future fourth member…?” repeated Kou, now even more confused as to why Haruka looked so uncomfortable.

“This way!” cried Nagisa as he and Rei dragged Haru through the gate and towards the spectator benches, their eyes scanning for someone tall with olive green hair. Having lost some of his strength to sickness, Haru was powerless to stop them, but he kept his head down and refused to assist in any way. Not that he needed to. Tachibana was taller than most of the students gathering for practice, so Rei spotted him within seconds, finally able to attach a name to the student he had run into twice in the hallways.

“Over there!” he called to the others, nodding in Tachibana’s direction, at which point Haru lifted his head just barely, careful not to stare. He had never seen the other in anything but his school uniform and track suit, having done his best to avoid looking at him in the locker room, but now that he saw him in something skin-tight, he finally understood why the boys in class seemed afraid to anger him. His build was all firm, hard muscle: he easily looked heavier and stronger than even Rin. He was dressed in sneakers, knee-length black lycra shorts that showed off his legs, white running shorts, and a matching sleeveless shirt to leave his arms free, standing with a vaulting pole in his hands as he waited calmly for his turn.

“Just look at him,” said Nagisa to Kou. “It’s his destiny!”

“Does he hold a record for swimming or something?” asked Kou.

“No! It’s his name – Tachibana Mako-chan!”

Haruka winced. That was the first time he had heard anyone call Tachibana _that_ , and something told him he would be in great danger of hearing it a lot more often, had it not been for the fact that their case was utterly hopeless.

“He’s the same as us. A boy with a girly name!” finished Nagisa with sparkling eyes.

“That’s your reason?!” cried Kou.

“Mm hmm.”

“But I have to agree…” said Kou, now devoting greater attention to Tachibana’s physique, especially the musculature of his arms as he held out the pole to test its weight. “Look at those deltoids…!” she whispered in awe. Haru’s face darkened as he turned his head to stare at her. Rei, too, was about to protest the objectification of their prospective fourth member when Nagisa interrupted, waving his arms excitedly.

“Yoo hoo! Mako-chaaan!” he cried, hoping to get a better look of the elusive new friend before he might be called to demonstrate, and unwittingly starting a chain of horrified reactions. Rei froze in an indignant grimace. Haruka whipped up his head in shock. Kou flung up her hands to cover her mouth, and Tachibana flinched so hard the pole gave a visible wobble in his hands. He glanced around just slightly, hoping the nickname was not addressed to him, but Nagisa’s next _Over here!_ and his cheerful waving could not be missed or ignored, leaving them to face each other in a variety of conflicting feelings. Tachibana in particular looked confused and weary, but his face softened almost as soon as he spotted Haruka. He broke into a sheepish smile and lifted his hand to wave. Haru pursed his lips and lowered his head again, not returning the gesture. Rei was now beginning to worry in earnest, but Tachibana didn’t seem to mind the embarrassment or the silent treatment. He merely cocked his head to the side, and when his name was called (“Next! Tachibana!”), he yelled _Coming!_ and left for the runway.

“We’re lucky he’s not easily offended, Nagisa-kun…” muttered Rei, shooting a glare at the other.

“I just wanted to say hello, that’s all!” pouted Nagisa.

“Hey, pay attention,” said Kou. “He’s about to jump.”

Haruka lifted his head again just barely, his gaze flickering between each person around him in growing vexation as they became more and more excited.

“I wonder what his approach is,” whispered Rei as he watched Tachibana assume his stance and lean backwards, preparing for his run. “Do you think he uses theory and calculation?”

“I’m pretty sure that’s just you, Rei-chan,” replied Nagisa. “Maybe he goes with his gut. Ooh! Perhaps Haru-chan would know!”

“I don’t,” replied Haruka, upset he wasn’t merely withholding information – he was lacking it. Worse, everyone was openly discussing Tachibana like he was theirs _._ Haruka wanted them to shut up about him. Better yet, he wished none of this were happening, but it was too late now…

_3… 2… 1._

Everyone stared hypnotized as Tachibana broke into a sprint and his large frame moved more with force than grace or speed, charging towards the other end like a meteor ready to blow everything away. The pole was jammed into place and bent so wildly it threatened to break, but Tachibana’s legs swung upward until he came shooting through the air above the crossbar, landing on the mattress beyond with a loud _THUD_. Everyone was silent, Haruka completely frozen to the spot as the others thawed out and looked happily to one another.

“He uses sheer strength…” breathed Rei, obviously impressed. “He’s a _powerhouse..!_ ”

“His form was great,” agreed Nagisa.

“Oh _yes!_ And his biceps are _amazing!_ ” cried Kou in adoration. Haruka tensed as he felt his face grow hot. A moment later, no longer held captive by the others, he turned stiffly and hurried off towards the gate.

“Haru-chan, don’t go!” whined Nagisa behind him. _“At least tell us why you broke up over the swim club!_ ” he shouted after him, but unfortunately for Nagisa, he could not have thought of a better way to make Haruka not just walk, but run out of there.


	13. EPISODE 3: Powerful Dolphin Kick! - Part 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  
> 
> Another minor edit. Enjoy!

After a moment’s hesitation, Nagisa, Rei, and Kou left the track field for the second-year classroom in an attempt to catch Haruka, but they were out of luck. They found the room completely empty and their senpai long gone, having fled from further torment by his nosy lowerclassmen, who just had to snoop around and ruin _everything_. Anger and shame lapped at Haruka’s heels as he ran to the bicycle rack, tore at him on his ride back home, and kept gnawing him relentlessly in the bathtub, where he seethed for a good hour not knowing what to do anymore. He wanted to keep Tachibana safe and hidden from Nagisa and Rei when it was no longer possible, wanted him to join the swim club just so it wouldn’t be some stranger and yet his every earlier experience protested it, still unsure he could bear it if… _if… No._ But there was no turning back now. Nagisa and Rei had clearly set their sights on Tachibana, and if Haru did not persuade him soon, his willful, meddlesome teammates would eventually find a way to beat him to it. The mere thought made Haru clench his jaws in defiance. He would not allow it, it had to be prevented at all costs, and the more he racked his mind for viable ways of securing Tachibana before the others, the less he reflected on the fact that just as Matsuoka Rin had made selfish claims to Haru all those years ago, Haruka himself was now unwittingly making the same claims to Tachibana with eerily similar motives, and little thought of how the object of his schemes might feel.

Homework, dinner, and the bathtub produced no sparks of genius, but a suitable idea presented itself at last after midnight, so Haru finally drew the covers over himself and closed his eyes with a sigh. Tomorrow the slow, steady, and low-effort siege would begin, and if Tachibana truly cared about their friendship, he would surrender to Haruka and Haruka alone.

* * *

The next day at school, Haru pointedly ignored Tachibana and his every attempt to make amends for yesterday’s ill-fated conversation, pouting incessantly as he focused all his attention on what seemed to be a late assignment for Art class.

“How are you feeling today, Haru?” “Were those your friends yesterday?” “Did you all come down there just to see me?” “They said I might make the pole vaulting team if I practiced more – guess I’ll have to get in better shape,” Tachibana went on in a light, hopeful voice, pausing a bit longer each time he was given the cold shoulder in reply. Haruka was growing more upset with every word, but said nothing. Something would eventually have to give way, and since he managed to uphold the silence long enough, what gave way first was Tachibana’s patience.

“Why can’t you be happy for me, Haru?” he scolded Haruka after third period, his tone almost whiny. “I’ve been running to school and back almost every day since I’ve joined, and worked very hard to be able to do that pole vault.”

Haru clenched his jaw, furrowing his brow as he turned to glare at Tachibana.

“ _Why the track team?_ ”

“Eh..?” blinked Tachibana. Haru pursed his lips.

“You’ve known about the swim club and the pool for a month now,” he began, letting his anger carry him away before reason might reign it in. “You knew it was important. You knew we were recruiting members. You even said my poster was great. _Why did you choose the track team?_ ”

His tone sounded strangely bitter, which only seemed to confuse Tachibana more.

“But… Haru, you never told me you wanted me on the team!” he cried in surprise. Haru gritted his teeth. It was painful to acknowledge that he did do his best to never suggest anything of the sort.

“I assumed you and your friends would find someone soon, and besides…” continued Tachibana, his lips twisting in thought, “I prefer.. I prefer pole vaulting to swimming. I haven’t done any swimming since I was seven. I just don’t like water all that much.”

If the guy intended to be tactful at all, he had failed in the most grievous way.

“Then stay away from the water,” replied Haruka, shooting him a glare of resentment. “We don’t need anyone like _that._ ”

There was a pause. Tachibana’s face hardened.

“Fine,” he said, averting his eyes from Haruka.

“ _Fine._ ”

“ _Wonderful!_ ” snapped Tachibana, and they both turned their heads to sink for the next two hours into bitter silence, further exacerbated by quiet snickering all over the class, which fixed them as the youngest old married couple to ever bicker on this side of Iwatobi High School.

* * *

At first, both insisted on the silent treatment and refused to acknowledge the other, but soon enough, Haru and Tachibana began shooting curious but reserved glances at each other, which always seemed to miss by one split second. Haruka was the instigator once again, refusing to give up despite the other’s deeply offensive remarks, and luckily for him, mild and peaceful Tachibana was growing tired of quarrelling with him after they had been getting along so well. It was almost shameful to abuse the guy’s good will, but Haruka persisted, completely engrossing himself in his art assignment not to dwell on his own actions too much. _It won’t be long now,_ he reassured himself… and just a few minutes before fifth period, Tachibana proved him right again.

“Haru..” he whispered to his friend, turning to him with a gentle expression that spoke of his earnest wish to placate Haruka by lunch hour. “I’m sorry, Haru. I know the swim club is important to you. I promise I’ll try to help you out in some other way.. okay?”

Haru stared ahead, his lips tightly pursed. It wasn’t what he wanted to hear, so he considered ignoring Tachibana for good, but after a moment’s hesitation, his arm shifted and he reached out to place a folded note on Tachibana’s desk. He then withdrew his hand just as fast and folded his arms tightly over his chest, as though he were bracing himself for the other’s reaction. Tachibana blinked and took the message in his hands, his eyebrows running to his forehead. He unfolded it slowly, his breath held back in anticipation of what could have been anything from a request to an apology.

He twitched. Instead of anything one could rationally expect in his situation, Tachibana was faced with what appeared to be a startlingly elaborate drawing of himself in nothing but a black legskin and goggles, holding a kickboard and raising a whistle boldly upward as waves splashed around his feet and strings of flags hung about him, framed by two long stretches of parchment. Judging by the eraser marks, the top one originally read _Join Us and Swim!_ , but now spelled out in smaller characters, _Join the swim club, Makoto._ The bottom parchment had been cleaned up too, and now said in much larger characters, _RESPECT THE WATER._ Tachibana nearly choked and turned back to stare at Haruka. Haru withstood his gaze, never blinking as he lifted his hand to dangle a strap of Iwatobi-chan at him. Tachibana’s arms dropped in agony, his head bonking against the desk with such force it startled the girl in front of him.

* * *

As much as Haruka’s personalized recruitment poster appeared to be a slap in the face, Tachibana folded it carefully, then slipped it into his pocket without looking at Haruka. He ignored the other for the rest of class, and the moment lunch hour began, he snatched up his orange furoshiki and left class in a hurry. Haruka pursed his lips and grabbed his own lunch to follow him, breaking into a jog in the hall to keep up with Tachibana, who made a turn and entered the stairwell to the roof. Haru’s heart was beating fiercely. Whether he intended it or not, the guy was running into a dead end. All Haruka would have to do was reach the top and stand in the doorway, and he would corner Tachibana for good.

When he at last reached the door leading to the roof, he was panting so fiercely he had to rest against the wall for a minute to catch his breath, the consequences of his illness keenly felt. He need not have bothered and exerted himself so foolishly, however. Just as he expected, he found Tachibana resting by the railing, staring in the direction of the pool, the pool Haruka had cleaned with his own two hands just so he could swim. After all they had been through, didn’t Tachibana understand how important it was to him? Or was he ignoring Haruka’s pleas on purpose..?

Tachibana remained motionless as Haru approached him, stopping just a few feet away to clear his throat. Tachibana’s shoulders tensed, but he would not acknowledge him, and when Haru coughed a little harder and still received no response, not even a slight turn of the head, he stepped forward and settled to Tachibana’s right, placing his lunch bag on top of the wall. For a little while, they stood in silence. Tachibana hadn’t touched his lunch yet and Haruka was staring at the pool in the distance, so close and yet so far it wrenched his heart.

He risked a glance at Tachibana, but the other had since hung his head to stare at the cherry trees below. Haru’s lips quivered.

“Makoto…”

Tachibana winced as though he had been struck.

“Haru, please—” he began, to be interrupted by a container swinging into his view. It was Haruka’s bento, one of the two he tended to carry together.

“I’ll give you this if you join the swim club,” he said, his voice strained. “Mackerel in miso.”

“Haru, is that your lunch..?”

“You said it was excellent,” pressed Haru, his face scrunching up. “You can have it. I’ll make more. _Join already so I can swim!_ ”

Tachibana tensed, his features darkening.

“You want to swim?”

“Yes.”

“You want to swim with your friends?”

“ _Yes._ ”

“Are you going to enter tournaments?”

“Sure, why not?” replied Haru, still holding out the bento that was slightly trembling in his extended grasp.

“Would you really be okay with that?” asked Tachibana, his voice suddenly quiet. Haruka’s eyes widened as the other went on to say, looking almost pained, “Would you be okay even if you ended up racing Matsuoka Rin.. and beating him again?”

They stared at each other for a long moment, Tachibana’s own eyes so clear Haru felt small and naked, visibly shrinking from the stare that had pierced right through him.

“How do you know about that...?” he said in a hollow voice, lowering the bento.

“A few weeks ago, I met someone called Sasabe,” explained Tachibana, his eyes drifting away. “He asked me if I had been a member of the Iwatobi Swimming Club, and when I told him I wasn’t but that you might have been, it turned out he knew who you were. He told me he hadn’t seen you swim or compete anywhere since you had beaten Rin in a race. You felt really guilty about your friend, didn’t you, Haru..?”

Haruka’s heart hammered inside, his cheeks drained of blood.

 _Why did anyone have to find out… and of all people, why_ you.. _?_

“I was wrong,” he mumbled at last, his voice a whisper. “I shouldn’t have—”

“You shouldn’t have _what,_ Haru?” demanded Tachibana out of the blue, his eyes firmly fixed on Haruka. “You shouldn’t have given it your all when your rival asked you to race him?”

Haru froze. Was Tachibana reading his mind?

“You didn’t hurt anybody,” pleaded the other, one hand clutching the railing so hard his knuckles turned white. “You were honest with him. Would you rather you had slowed down and given him a false victory? Would it have been better for him to believe he was faster, and then fail where it really mattered just because he thought he was much better?”

Haru stared at him like he was speaking an alien language. Those bright green eyes seemed harder and graver than he had ever seen them.

“I understand he was upset, but that’s no excuse for blaming you,” said Tachibana, his eyes cast down again. “He should have apologized to you once he calmed down. If he had, perhaps you would have both moved on and you would be in a _real_ swim club by now, winning one tournament after another or just swimming with your friends. He was unfair, and it was wrong.”

Once he stopped, having spilled the words he must have bottled up inside and mulled over for weeks, Tachibana turned back towards the pool and hung his head again, leaving Haru speechless as his insides whirled in sickly summersaults. He had never been good at confrontations, indeed had often run from them or turned his head away, yet Haru was still standing in the same spot he had first taken by the railing, unable to stop staring at the other. At first he could not move, his heart thrashing about like some small, fierce animal in a tight and heavy cage, but as it gradually fell into rhythm, the chill of his initial shock shattered and melted into cool tingles all over him. An almost unbearable lightness filled his chest in its wake, and had Haruka’s feet not frozen firmly to the ground, the slightest gust of wind might have whisked him towards the skies.

It took him an awful long time to speak, and when he did, his voice was thick.

“Makoto..”

His friend turned back to him, his features still apprehensive. Haruka lowered his eyes.

“You can have this,” he said quietly, holding out the bento again. Makoto sighed.

“Haru… I can’t. You make great mackerel, you really do, but I can’t join the swim club. I just can’t.”

Haruka stared back and pursed his lips, his shoulders shaking in frustration at his failed attempt. Others always made it seem so easy… so why couldn’t he manage it?

“Then _take it for what it is,_ ” he said the next moment, thrusting the box out so far he nearly jabbed Makoto in the chest with it. “Just take it! No one’s forcing you to _eat_ it…”

Makoto stared at him. Haruka felt his cheeks grow hot, half wishing the ground swallowed either of them whole, but his friend soon broke into a smile that turned those harsh green eyes into soft meadows again. He reached out and gently pinched up one end of the bento, but did it so lightly Haru could not let go, obliged to follow Makoto, who made him set it down between them.

“Thank you, Haru,” he said, his voice finally warm. “If you really want me to have it, then I want you to share it with me.”

Haruka stared at him dumbstruck. Makoto paused.

“Oh! And.. here…” he continued as he unpacked his bento, “I brought onigiri today.”

He quickly picked one and held it out for Haruka, but as the other was too slow to move, Makoto reached out to take and draw up Haru’s hand, placing the onigiri onto his palm. His hand was large and hot as a furnace, spreading its heat into Haru’s bones as Makoto gently folded his fingers onto the seaweed strip.

“There you go,” said Makoto, cocking his head to the side with a smile. Haruka’s throat was too tight for a _Thank you_ , but he did lift the onigiri to take a small bite, and he could tell from the way Makoto’s eyes settled in a lazy, content gaze that the other had caught his meaning anyway. Makoto soon joined him, borrowing Haruka’s chopsticks to sample the mackerel in miso, claiming the smaller fillet to leave the larger one for his friend.

* * *

Once they finished lunch, Makoto repeated his offer of finding a way to help even if he didn’t join the swim club, and as much as his resistance seemed almost perverse in light of the effort put in to convince him, Haruka conceded. There was still time until they had any chance at entering tournaments. If Makoto yielded at every turn thus far, Haruka was willing to let him decide when (no longer _if_ ) he would join the swim club. From that moment onward, the subject of swimming and track had closed between them not to discomfort either, but Makoto soon wished he could have brought it up again. Once the pressure of Haruka’s expectations settled on his shoulders, his performance at the track field began to falter in alarming ways. His running did not suffer, and he was often praised for his stamina, but pole vaulting was his prime object… _and yet…_

“Tachibana!”

“Coming!”

When it was his turn to pole vault on Friday and he swung upward with all his might to clear the crossbar, the pole that had survived his every attempt so far curled into a pretzel and snapped in three, dropping Makoto to the ground just inches from any stretch of mattress to cushion his fall.

“Tachibana!” came the coach’s voice, who hurried over as another student helped Makoto to his feet. “Are you alright?”

Tachibana clenched his jaw as his back throbbed like a heart full of rocks. No wonder the pole couldn’t bear him.. it was hard enough for him to carry the weight…

“I think so…” he breathed, then hissed when he straightened. The coach sighed.

“You exert too much pressure,” he said, shaking his head sadly. “Stop for today and go to the nurse’s office. You have to be more careful, son.”

“I’m sorry,” mumbled Makoto, his head hanging as he left towards the outer ring in growing guilt and shame. _At least this week is finally over_ , he thought to himself. He wanted nothing more except to get away from everything and everyone, even Haru _._

* * *

After a break that was well deserved by all parties, next Monday appropriately began with a breakthrough. Kou sent each boy a message to join her by the pool, and when they gathered after school, she was in such high spirits as they hadn’t seen her be in ages.

“I have good news,” she began, clapping her hands together. “Amazingly enough, I was able to schedule a joint practice with Samezuka Academy for Thursday afternoon!”

“What? Really?!” cried Nagisa, his eyes lighting up.

“How did you manage, Kou-san?” asked Rei, obviously impressed. Kou straightened and put her hands on her hips.

“You’d think my brother would help me, but he didn’t, so I went straight to their captain!” she replied, her hands still tingling with the memory of Captain Mikoshiba clasping them firmly in his as he said, _Joint practice? That sounds great! Let’s do it!_ Whether he had done so to make amends or from more tender considerations mattered little. He was kind, obliging, and now that he addressed her as Gou-san, Mikoshiba Seijuurou was growing more agreeable by the hour.

“That’s our capable manager!” cried Nagisa, drawing a sweet smile from Kou.

“Does that mean we have permission to swim in Samezuka’s indoor pool now?” asked Rei, neither of them looking at Haruka, who continued to gaze off into space in silence.

“Well, yes and no,” replied Kou, looking almost sheepish. “Since it’s a joint practice, we need to bring at least four members.”

“That means we have to recruit a new member before the practice,” said Nagisa, glancing to the others. “Especially since Kou-chan used her sex appeal to get us this chance.”

“I didn’t use sex appeal!” cringed Kou, her cheeks coloring in indignation.

“Huh? You didn’t?”

“ _Of course not!_ ”

Haruka turned his head away from them, staring absently at the pool. As much as he never wanted anything to do with the swim club directly, everyone’s being able to swim now hinged on Makoto, and Haru wasn’t the only one who thought so. As soon as Kou was done reprimanding him, Nagisa spun around to Haruka with newfound eagerness.

“Haru-chan, can we come over tomorrow and talk to Mako-chan?”

“No,” replied Haru, shooting him a look. Rei scowled.

“Haruka-senpai, this is getting ridiculous, why are you so obstinate about this?”

“ _I’ll_ talk to him.”

“What? Really?!” blurted Nagisa, obviously surprised.

“Yeah,” replied Haruka, shooting Rei a glare for huffing at his words, and giving Haru a look that said, _I’ll believe it when I see it._

* * *

Captain Mikoshiba’s sportsmanlike, strategically prudent _and_ chivalrous decision to hold a joint practice with the Iwatobi Swim Club was not received as warmly by the hosts as it had been by their future guests. Rin learnt it just before their running session in the evening, and could not stop gritting his teeth through most of it until they arrived back at the starting point, where he stopped to wait for Nitori.

“Nobody told me there would be a joint practice,” he said to his roommate when Nitori caught up, his shoulders twitching.

“Captain Mikoshiba made the call,” he explained between gasps. Having shared a room with his senpai for a few weeks now, Nitori was slowly but surely warming up to him, sometimes even daring to initiate and engage the other’s attention… within reason, of course.

“Your younger sister is a member of the Iwatobi Swim Club, right, Senpai? The Captain said they needed to bring at least four members, but I only know of three so far: Nanase Haruka, Hazuki Nagisa, and Ryuugazaki Rei, who are all former members of the Iwatobi Swimming Club and boys with girly—” he carried on, until an icy glare from Rin froze his throat solid. “Ack! Sorry…”

“How do you know?” spoke Rin, eyeing the other with suspicion. Nitori smiled.

“I participated in a tournament you were in,” he replied, straightening his shoulders with pride. “I believe that was your last tournament as a grade-schooler, Matsuoka-senpai. My team lost in the preliminaries, but that race was amazing to watch!” finished Nitori with a grin. Rin drew a sharp breath, his eyes falling bleakly to the ground.

Far away in his backyard, Haruka let the local cats have the remainder of his dinner, but as he brushed his hand over their soft fur, he sneezed so hard it set them scurrying off with frightened mewls. Haruka sniffed and wiped his nose with a finger.

_Somebody’s talking about me after all._

* * *

The next morning, Haruka set off to school earlier than his usual time, resolved to finish what he had started, and secure Makoto for the swim team before Nagisa and Rei might interfere. If he hoped to succeed, he had no choice but to continue his assault whether Makoto was ready or not, and judging by how unusually silent he had been on Monday, Haruka deemed it best to conclude the uneasy business once and for all in his own favor.

“Good morning, Haru,” Makoto greeted him upon his arrival, his voice just as subdued as it had been yesterday. After three days, his back still pulsed with a dull throb and warned him with stabbing aches against twisting about too much, but unable to bring up the subject, he forced himself to pretend there was no subject at all.

“Morning,” replied Haru, drawing a deep breath through his nose. “Makoto..”

“Yes, Haru..?”

“We have joint practice on Thursday, but we need four members to go,” said Haru, turning his head to lock the other in a stare. “We need one more.”

Makoto tensed, his back prickling with a thousand needles of pain.

“I see,” he said, lowering his head to escape the other’s gaze.

“Well? Will you come?” asked Haru, his eyes seeking Makoto’s. They didn’t meet.

“Haru…”

“ _Will you come?_ ”

Spurred by how urgent Haruka sounded, Makoto finally lifted his head.

“I don’t know, Haru. Can I have more time to think? There are still two days left, right?”

“Right..” replied Haru, squinting at him. They fell silent for an hour, then conversation resumed again, this time revived by Haruka.

“Why do you like track so much?”

A strange question, put forward in a strange tone that suggested Haru could see nothing enticing about running in circles or jumping over crossbars. Makoto paused in thought.

“I don’t know,” he replied in earnest, his hands curling into fists. “I guess.. I just hoped it would be something I was good at.”

Haru quirked his brow. Makoto was staring at his desk so hard his head was hanging.

“Did something happen?” asked Haru, his eyes narrowed. Makoto sighed.

“I broke a vaulting pole on Friday,” he admitted in a heavy tone. “Nobody has done that yet, not this year, anyway. They said I won’t make the pole vaulting team if it happens again.”

“You broke a pole?” echoed Haru, obviously not privy to how the equipment worked.

“You know how it bends under your weight when you first lift off the ground, and builds up tension that helps propel you over the crossbar when it straightens again? I guess I bent it too much. It snapped right under me, and I fell on my back.”

Haru’s eyes widened.

“…Did it hurt?” he asked, glancing over the other as if looking for signs of injury in the folds of Makoto’s uniform. Makoto nodded.

“I was in bed all weekend. I’m lucky I didn’t break anything.”

Haruka paused. His lips twitched apart as though he were going to reply, but after a minute or two, what came out instead was,

“You can’t get hurt in the water like that.”

Makoto didn’t reply.

* * *

“Haru-chan, has Mako-chan said yes?” asked Nagisa at lunch break, which the first-years suggested they all spend on the roof. They were hoping Haru would bring his friend along, but Haruka came alone, picking a spot seemingly at random by the railing.

“He’s thinking about it,” he said, staring down at the park where Makoto was lying on his stomach in the grass, his orange furoshiki still unpacked.

“Haruka-senpai, there really is no time—”

“He has one more day left.”

“We should go to the track field and learn their secrets,” mused Nagisa as he and Rei walked over to peer down at Makoto. “They must be doing something right that we don’t.”

“Maybe we started recruitment too late,” sighed Rei. “We should have advertised from the very beginning, flaunting all of our assets and advantages..!”

“An unused pool full of weed and trash?” said Nagisa. Rei twitched into an indignant scowl.

“Maybe we should have invited everyone to look at the pool when it was finished…” moaned Nagisa. _Too little too late,_ thought Haru.

“Perhaps if we showed Tachibana-san how beautiful it looks now…”

“He’s seen it,” replied Haruka, his chin resting on his arms.

“Eh?!” cried Nagisa. Even Rei looked shocked.

“But I’ve never seen him around the pool area before…!”

“We’re not the only ones who go to the roof at lunch,” replied Haruka, his look deadpan.

“Right…” said Nagisa, his eyes drifting into the yard again. “Mako-chan looks kinda lonely down there,” he said next, sounding genuinely concerned. “Why don’t we go down and sit with him a little?”

“Let him be,” replied Haruka, his features hardening. “He wants to be alone.”

“You’re awful protective of him, Haru-chan,” said Nagisa with a wink.

“Enough, already,” said Haru, turning his head away. “You’ve been obnoxious all trimester.”

“Sorry, Haru-chan..” came a real apology, soft and kind. “All Rei-chan and I wanted was for you to find a friend in a class, and when you found one so quickly, we got really excited, that’s all…”

“How come you didn’t want to talk about him, Haruka-senpai? He seems respectable in every way,” said Rei. “His pole vaulting was— well, perhaps it wasn’t beautiful _per se_ but it was well-executed!”

“He was not my friend then,” replied Haruka.

“Ah… But he _is now_ ,” said Nagisa, having caught a meaning Haru might not have intended but nonetheless allowed. “He must be special to be so precious to Haru-chan.”

Haruka said nothing, his eyes falling where Makoto was still lying in the grass, his lunch untouched for the rest of the break.

* * *

Far from Nagisa and Rei to leave the outcome to mere chance, both of them spent every break on Wednesday shoving posters into people’s faces and hands. They even went so far as to offer straps of Iwatobi-chan for free as a promotional offer, with no takers to nobody’s surprise. Makoto was silent all day, obviously anxious in the jaws of the deadline set for him, while Haruka sat at his desk tongue-tied, not knowing how to entice Makoto if straps, posters, mackerel, and even the offer of his friendship had done nothing to truly sway the guy. The idea that Makoto didn’t like the water for whatever ghastly reason often emerged in Haruka’s thoughts, and it never seemed to sting any less, no matter how much the team needed him. At this point, had Makoto been some stranger, Haruka felt he would not have bothered with him any longer.

When lunch break arrived, Makoto remained in his seat, but didn’t so much as look at his backpack, let alone search for his bento. He slowly leaned forward instead, trying to find a position that didn’t abuse his back, but just as he settled in minimal comfort, a voice shattered his feeble hopes of peace.

“Haru-chan, Mako-chan..!” chirped Nagisa with a cheerful wave of his hand as he dragged a reluctant Rei through the door. Haruka glared at them, obviously upset they disregarded his terms. Next to him, Makoto sighed into the folds of his arms, straightening carefully to face Haruka’s friends.

“Hello,” he said to them, doing his best to sound more enthusiastic than he felt. “I don’t think we’ve been properly introduced before…” he hazarded to say next, unsure if he liked being called ‘Mako-chan.’ Rei gave him an apologetic look.

“Well, remember us from when you pole vaulted?” asked Nagisa, as though his waving his arms and yelling _Mako-chaaan!_ at the top of his lungs could be forgotten any time soon. “We’re friends of Haru-chan, and members of the Iwatobi Swim Club! Hazuki Nagisa,” he pointed to his chest, then motioned to Rei. “Ryuugazaki Rei-chan!”

“Good day, Tachibana-san,” mumbled Rei, his cheeks coloring slightly at Nagisa tacking _-chan_ onto his name even for introductions, with no regard to his position as vice-captain. Makoto gave him a tentative smile and nodded, more glad to hear ‘Tachibana-san,’ and not surprised it was coming from a boy who apologized to him profusely twice in a row.

“You must have come to see Haru,” he said, pushing his chair backwards to stand. “I guess I’ll leave you to—”

“No, no, please stay, Mako-chan!” cried Nagisa with a small wave of his hands. Makoto tensed, but remained seated. “I know we weren’t supposed to come,” continued Nagisa, flashing a sheepish grin at visibly fuming Haruka, “but we want to ask if you’ll join the swim club!”

“We were scheduled for joint practice tomorrow afternoon at Samezuka Academy, but we are one member short of being able to attend,” explained Rei.

“If we don’t go, we might not get to swim for another month,” added Nagisa, rubbing the back of his head with a light, nervous chuckle. “We originally formed the club so we could swim with Haru-chan again.”

“I’m well aware of that,” muttered Makoto, not looking at anyone in particular. The others fixed their eyes on him expectantly, all except Haruka, who turned his head with a bitter frown. It was over. After all he had done, Makoto would choose Nagisa and Rei over him. He almost wished it weren’t happening, that Makoto would refuse or flee like he had before, yet the silence stretched on far too long, prompting him to glance back only to find Makoto’s eyes boring into his.

“If this is what you really want, I’ll join you on Thursday as a trial member,” said Makoto, looking at no one except him. Haruka’s heart gave a leap.

“Really?! Hooray!” cried Nagisa, jumping at Rei, who just barely managed to hold onto him and stop them from toppling over.

“But I have one condition,” continued Makoto sternly. Everyone went quiet again, staring intently. “I’ll be there, but I won’t do any swimming.”

Haruka’s eyes hardened, but Nagisa merely shrugged. “Don’t worry, we’ll think of a good excuse, Mako-chan.”

“Severe back injury,” said Haruka with an innocuous shrug of his shoulders, careful not to look at Makoto, who gave him a warning glare.

“That sounds wonderful!” cheered Nagisa, then seemed to realize his blunder and flushed. “As an excuse, I mean! Haha, aaah… Sorry, Mako-chan.”

“It’s alright,” said Makoto, forcing a half-hearted smile.

“It’s settled then. We are looking forward to seeing you on Thursday. Thank you very much for joining us!” said Rei, performing a deep bow to make up for Nagisa’s faux-pas. Makoto blinked, then finally laughed, quiet though it was.

“I’ll see you on Thursday, Hazuki-kun, Ryuugazaki-kun,” he replied, then watched as Nagisa dragged Rei away for lunch, leaving him and Haruka behind. Makoto fell silent again, his face darker than before, but he didn’t idle for long like he might have done on his own. Haruka shook his head, then made a show of searching his backpack for his lunch, eventually persuading Makoto by example to do the same. There was no need to say anything on either side. Makoto was bound irreversibly by his word, and Haruka savored his victory with a small smile, which might have gone unnoticed by the other but was undoubtedly, irrefutably there.


	14. EPISODE 3: Powerful Dolphin Kick! - Part 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next morning, Makoto emptied his duffel bag with a heavy heart to make way for his Iwatobi High School tracksuit. He then hurried off to school, and though he had arrived earlier than his usual time for class, his discomfort was apparent and his contributions few and far between. Not that he was actively prompted to speak, not at all. As a sign of good faith, Nagisa and Rei steered clear of Class 2-1, while Haruka sank into silence, immersing himself in pleasant daydreams of the water. After all, Makoto’s quiet greeting and a few stray glances confirmed he was not in his usual talkative mood. That was permission enough to think of Samezuka Academy’s indoor pool, and think of it far more often than the fact that Haruka had willfully coaxed his friend into something Makoto protested to the last. The thought did sometimes sweep across the sea of his mind, leaving virulent ripples in its wake, but Haruka pushed it away like a stubborn child. Surely Makoto could endure watching him swim from the safety of the sidelines for a mere two hours on an uneventful Thursday afternoon. No twisted preference for track or dislike for water could justify such stubborn resistance, not when Haru was asking for so little and fought for it so hard.

After sixth period, Makoto went to the bathroom to change into his tracksuit, then walked down to the trains station with Haru, cloaked in somber silence that painted a convincing portrait of him as the fourth member who was still recovering from an injury, but represented his club with dignity regardless. Now that the time was drawing near, Makoto was almost glad for Haru’s interjection, and felt he would be able to play the part very well, thankful that everyone else was blissfully oblivious he didn’t have to feign any pain he was supposed to feel. The walk was long, and they hadn’t spoken ten words together along the way, but whenever he glanced over to Haru, Makoto’s lips twitched into a small, faint smile. After so long, Haru would finally be able to swim with his friends… and if all it took to secure his pleasure was a few idle hours every week, Makoto thought that being no more than filler might not be so bad after all.

* * *

Nagisa, Rei, and Kou were waiting for them at the station, the boys still in their regular uniforms, but their manager dressed in a standard first-year Iwatobi tracksuit to fit in better with her team of swimmers. She and Makoto had only glimpsed each other briefly at the track field. They had not been introduced yet, but the time had come at last, and Kou was looking forward to it despite Nagisa’s sad intelligence that Tachibana-senpai was to remain clothed for the entirety of joint practice. She flashed him a sweet smile on arrival nonetheless, at which point Nagisa stepped forward, charitable and eager as ever.

“Mako-chan, you haven’t met our manager yet,” he said to Makoto as he motioned to Kou, who clasped her hands in delight. “This is Kou-chan.”

“Nice to meet you. I’m Tachibana Makoto,” said Makoto, nodding his head with a warm, obliging smile. Kou returned the gesture.

“Nice to meet you, Tachibana-senpai. I’m Matsuoka Kou,” she replied, and for one moment, Makoto’s expression slipped from gentle calm to confusion and surprise. Haru noticed and turned his head stiffly, but the others merely found it odd.

“Is something wrong, Mako-chan?” asked Nagisa. Makoto quickly composed himself, scratching his cheek with a finger.

“No, it’s nothing,” he replied with an innocent smile.

Once he and Haru bought their tickets, it was only a matter of minutes before they all boarded the train for Samezuka Academy. It was a long ride, where lively conversation promised a more agreeable journey, so the others happily engaged in a discussion, soon confirming Makoto’s suspicions of a connection between Matsuoka Kou and Matsuoka Rin. More curiously, there was a chance the mysterious rival might be present at joint practice, but while the thought filled Makoto with a sense of uneasiness, his concern for Haru was far greater still. He glanced at his friend every now and again to try and search his feelings, but Haruka showed no signs of excitement or anxiety. He merely sat wordlessly through the entire ride, though his eyes, equally guarded, often drifted to Makoto.

* * *

The first-years’ excited chatter of ‘Onii-chan,’ ‘Rin-chan,’ and ‘Rin-senpai’ only ceased once they got off the train and entered Samezuka Academy’s lush green campus, which everyone had visited by now except for Makoto. While the others led, he kept turning his head left and right to admire the scenery, all the way to the indoor swimming pool.

He soon entered the pool area with Kou, while Haruka, Nagisa, and Rei were shown to the locker room by a member of the Samezuka swim team. They reappeared some minutes later in their favorite swimsuits, Haru clad in his usual black and purple jammers, Nagisa wearing red jammers with yellow stars on them, and Rei sporting a dark purple legskin striped with an entire rainbow from top to bottom, though how he managed to look so dignified in it remained an utter mystery to Makoto. Rei was unavailable for comment, as he immediately started his warm-up stretching exercises, and prudent as such exercises seemed to be, nobody followed his example – Haruka was rubbing idly at his shoulder, and Nagisa was bouncing on his heels.

“Indoor pools are so nice!” he said with a happy sigh as he glanced around with a grin, but his excitement could scarcely compare to Kou’s, whose eyes kept jumping from one chiseled torso to another in a scrumptious visual feast of muscles.

 _Easy to see they’re from a champion school… But ours are just as good!_ she thought in admiration of Rei’s firm back and the hard flatness of Haruka’s stomach, wishing Tachibana-senpai would at least take off his jacket to reflect better on the united Iwatobi Swim Club. She could not bemoan Makoto’s unwillingness for long, however. Mikoshiba Seijuurou had received word of their arrival, and made his way over to bid them welcome.

“Hey! Thanks for coming,” he called out with a wave of his hand. Kou twirled around with a cheerful smile and Rei abandoned his exercises at last, joining the others in a bow as they said (and Haru merely nodded), _Thank you very much!_

“No problem,” replied Seijuurou, turning to Haruka next. “You’re Nanase-kun, right? You won a bunch of regional tournaments in grade school.”

“Yeah,” replied Haruka, his displeasure at being noticed and expected to talk so obvious, Makoto had to suppress his laughter.

“I’ve heard a lot about you. You may not remember, but when you won the Iwatobi regional, I was second. I still remember how you beat me on the fifty meter turn,” continued Seijuurou, apparently determined to have Haruka to himself for as long as possible. Watching Haru turn his head slightly to the side like an annoyed child was amusing, but Makoto’s attention was soon diverted from him. His smile faded with it. Not too far away, another figure had just entered the pool area, the shade of his dark hair rather suspect.

“Oh, Senpai,” said a first-year standing nearby. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” came the curt answer as the guy turned his head away to steal a careful glance at Haruka, who was still detained by Samezuka’s captain. Now that he was facing them, Makoto could finally see the now familiar red of those large, fiery eyes, but if he had any doubts left, the delightful glow of Kou’s face dispersed them as she ran past Seijuurou towards her brother.

“Ah, Onii-chan!” she called out with a smile. Rin stiffened and gave her a look.

“Gou,” he replied, his tone no less cold than how he had spoken to the first-year student who greeted him. “What are you trying to do?”

“Rin-chan!” cried Nagisa too, hurrying over with a grin. “We get to swim together again, so let’s have fun today!” he said, flashing his friend a peace sign. Rin scoffed.

“ _Together?_ Tch. You guys are a waste of my time,” he replied, then turned away from them, leaving the pool area for good.

“Onii-chan…” said Kou in a small voice, unheeded by her brother. One look at her drooping shoulders and Makoto’s face darkened, his features so uncharacteristically hard it even caught Rei’s attention, who left Haruka’s side to walk over to him.

“Think nothing of it, Tachibana-san. Rin-senpai simply wasn’t in the mood for conversation,” he said with an apologetic smile. Makoto nodded, and did his best to smooth out his expression, but that voice kept lingering and turned his mouth sour. He would have expected a brother, especially an older brother to be more kind and attentive to his sister. He searched his heart and immediately protested the idea of treating Ran so coolly in front of anybody, and when he measured Rin’s actions by the tender feelings of a younger sister, he found it all the more baffling that his friends condoned the other’s behavior so easily and defended him so decidedly. Not having known Rin the way they have despite his conversation with Coach Sasabe, Makoto had little choice but to trust their judgment of Matsuoka Rin’s true character, but while he had his own feelings for guidance and comparison, he secretly ventured to think of Rin just as he had before: unreasonable, and selfish to the core.

* * *

The two swim clubs soon gathered by the pool side to begin joint practice, and the Iwatobi Swim Club did their best to crowd in front of Makoto, who hopelessly towered above them like a large green cuckoo in a nest of rainbow robins.

“I was thinking that you could practice with our first-years today,” said Seijuurou, clapping his hands firmly together. “Okay! Let’s start with individual time trials… hm?”

He paused, then narrowed his eyes at Makoto. “You there! Get in your swimsuit.”

“Uh, I’m sorry, but I—” began Makoto, until Nagisa jumped in front of him to steal the captain’s attention.

“Oh, sorry! He’s injured so he can’t swim,” he said, laughing nervously as he rubbed the back of his head.

“ _What?_ Why is he here, then?” asked Seijuurou in a strict tone, turning back to Makoto again. “When did it happen? Where are you injured?”

“Last Friday… I fell on my back,” replied Makoto, sweat beading on his forehead.

“Almost a week ago, then,” mused the captain. “Do you have wounds or stitches?”

“..No, just bruising.”

“Can you bend down and move your arms?”

“Um, yeah, but—”

“Then swimming will help your muscles get back into shape. It’s called corrective physical therapy,” replied Seijuurou in a no-nonsense tone. “You probably didn’t bring a swimsuit. You can use one of ours, so go get changed!”

“Huh?!” blurted Makoto, now dangerously out of his comfort zone.

“Oi, Nitori!” shouted the Captain.

“Yes!” came the immediate reply, at which point the first-year from before hurried over to Makoto, motioning towards the changing rooms.

“Come with me, please,” he said. Makoto tensed.

“I’m sorry but I can’t—” he tried to explain, but was seized by the arm mid-speech to be taken to the changing room, dragged with greater strength than Makoto had imagined such a small frame to possess.

“Hurry up, please!” scolded Nitori on the way. “You’ll get in trouble if you don’t follow orders!”

“No, wait, you don’t understand!” Makoto insisted, shooting a horrified glance at his teammates as the doors closed behind him. Haruka’s face remained stiff and expressionless, but Rei and Nagisa exchanged worried glances.

“Uh-oh…” sighed Nagisa, not knowing half of what worried Makoto so much.

* * *

Makoto was soon returned to the others in nothing but a standard purple and green Samezuka speedo, feeling naked and vulnerable as he reunited with his teammates. Nobody offered any comment, but Kou admired his abs with a look of silent approval, while Haruka stole one wide-eyed glance at him and turned his head. Makoto sighed and stood next to Nagisa and Rei, his arms wrapped around as much of his bare torso as he could reasonably cover on his own. Nagisa flashed him a soothing smile and patted his shoulder, his eyes drifting to Makoto’s back in awe.

“Oh wow, you even painted on bruises just in case!” he said wide-eyed, then jabbed a curious finger into a colorful blotch in the middle of Makoto’s back. Makoto hissed and flinched violently. Nagisa reeled.

“ _Wh-What the_ — You didn’t tell me those were real!” yelped Nagisa, slapping a hand over his mouth. Rei pressed a hand to his face so hard the frame of his prescription goggles bit into his skin. Kou winced with a queasy expression, while Haruka stood in awkward silence as his foolproof plan backfired, putting Makoto’s injuries on shameful display. His back was a sad sight, his skin dipping into sickly hues of blue-tinted yellow and green where he had fallen on one of the broken pieces of the vaulting pole, but Mikoshiba took one look at his blotches and said they were healing nicely, and swimming any number of laps would only speed up muscle regeneration. This might have been a soothing thought to most, but it did nothing to cheer up Makoto.

“I don’t want to swim,” he whined uselessly to the others as the exemplary vice-captain stepped forward to be the first volunteer for time trials, assuming a perfect stance on top of his designated block. Nagisa patted Makoto’s shoulder again, his touch now careful and feather-light.

“Don’t worry, Mako-chan,” he said soothingly. “These time trials are just for practice, so it doesn’t matter if you’re slow.”

“It’s not my speed I’m worried about…” muttered Makoto.

“Relax, let’s watch Rei-chan take the first turn,” replied Nagisa, nudging him in the arm and pointing at Rei, who performed a beautiful dive at the blow of Mikoshiba’s whistle.

Now that the first swimmers had begun their laps, and all by-standers were free to observe as they chose, the boys watched Rei’s flawless butterfly stroke while Kou looked around, soon spotting her brother on the spectators’ balcony on the opposite side. Rin was leaning flat against the railing, watching the others swim… or so it would have appeared to a disinterested observer. He might have fooled some, but not his highly observant sister, who aptly traced his gaze back to Haruka, who stood idly on the side as he waited for his turn. Kou shook her head with a grin.

 _So he_ is _curious,_ she thought to herself, gladly forgiving Onii-chan for brushing them off so coolly before.

“I’m up next,” said Nagisa as Rei was making his way back, then left to take his place on the starting block, leaving Haruka and Makoto behind. They stood side by side now, Makoto glancing uneasily at the other, but Haru seemed unreachable by any silent plea, his eyes still fixed on the water and his cheeks just the slightest hint of pink.

“Ready!” shouted Captain Mikoshiba and Nagisa sprung forward at the blow of his whistle. On the side, Rei finally lifted himself up and out of the pool. “Keep it coming! Next swimmer, get ready!”

As soon as Rei adjusted his goggles, he walked back to his teammates to urge them, but as Haru showed no signs of readiness, Rei stopped in front of Makoto instead.

“You are next, Tachibana-san. Please assume your position on the starting block,” he said with all the self-importance his high position afforded. Makoto stared at him in horror.

“But, we agreed that I wouldn’t—”

“Hey, next swimmer!” shouted Mikoshiba, staring pointedly at the troublemaker. “Move to the starting block!”

“Can the next person get over here, please?” added Nitori, his voice just the slightest hint of annoyed. Makoto heaved a bitter sigh.

Once he snapped his borrowed goggles and swimming cap into place, to head towards the front of the pool, Haruka finally found his voice. However, all he said to his friend in a strict undertone was, _Respect the water_. Makoto bit his lip before he could say something he might regret, passing Haru and rising onto the starting block. The water below him was sparklingly clear, so translucent one could see the wobbling patterns of small blue tiles lining the bottom. It wasn’t too deep. It seemed to hold no secrets. As much as his back protested, Makoto managed to curl himself into position, his hands gripping the edge and his feet inching further and further apart, as though he were preparing to run.

Nagisa was drawing near and Makoto waited, frozen as a statue.

“Ready!”

He lowered his head slightly. Nagisa’s hands touched the wall.

“ _Set!_ ”

His arms tensed solid. The path was now clear.

“ ** _Go!_** ”

Mikoshiba blew his whistle and Makoto did not so much jump as hurl himself into the air to tackle the water head on, hurtling towards it at a flat angle that sent him crashing with full force against the unforgiving surface that could not let him through. He landed on his chest and stomach and twitched like an impaled animal, his arms and legs still stretched out as he drowned to the sound of his teammates’ cries. They stood there for several seconds, waiting for him to recover, but Makoto drifted to the bottom without resistance, his last gulp of air escaping in torn bubbles.

“Is he okay?!” cried Seijuurou.

“U-Um, this looks bad..!” stammered Kou, and as if on cue, Haruka sprinted forward to dive in, prompting Nagisa to scramble back towards the lane to help him. They gathered Makoto by his arms and dragged him to the surface, where he finally coughed water and gasped for air.

“Oh, thank goodness…” sighed Rei, pushing at his goggles with a shaky hand as Haru and Nagisa guided Makoto towards the edge, then helped him clamber out of the pool. Makoto’s shoulders were jumping wildly in his struggle to catch his breath, looking as though he were going to be sick.

“The bathrooms are down to the left,” offered Seijuurou. Makoto gasped a _Thank you_ and brushed the others’ hands away, taking a few winding steps that turned into a slow jog until he disappeared behind a door on the far end. Only then did Haruka turn to glare accusingly at Mikoshiba. The captain quirked his brow.

“He’ll be fine. He dived at a wrong angle, that’s all,” he said, turning back to join Nitori again. “Next!”

“Haru-chan, shouldn’t someone go after Mako-chan..?” asked Nagisa, his brow creased in worry. Haru bit his lip.

“I’ll check on him in a minute,” he said, following Mikoshiba’s lead to be the next diver. Rei sighed and shook his head but he and Nagisa stayed put: it was not unreasonable to give Makoto some time to recover.

* * *

Once Haru arrived back at the starting block, Rei moved forward so the captain would be free to leave for the bathroom. Haruka walked down the side and soon disappeared into the hallway, his pace slower than his concern warranted, for one reason only: he had no idea what to say to Makoto. He hardly knew what he had witnessed at the pool. The angle was wrong, there was too much momentum, his form was tense, and once he hit the surface, he seemed paralyzed. Had he never dived before? Could he even really swim…? There had to be a reason the water didn’t like him, and Haruka dreaded the answer.

Those were the thoughts that carried him to the bathroom, entering so silently his feet made no noise against the tiles, but every strange and convoluted thought was snatched out of his head when he finally spotted Makoto just past the wall. His friend was leaning against a sink in the far end, his hands gripping the edge as his whole frame shook like something inside him had snapped. His legs and chest and face trembled. Even his teeth were chattering, knocking together violently with each surge of his neck and shoulders. Haruka wanted to move, but he stood paralyzed in that living nightmare, watching helplessly as tears poured Makoto’s cheeks that the other could not wipe away. When he at last forced his jaws open, Makoto started heaving. Something splattered onto the sides of the sink. Haruka’s throat clamped shut as Makoto’s opened, his body twitching backwards of its own accord to flee the bathroom, unheard and unseen by Makoto. Outside, Haru threw his back against the wall, heart jumping and lungs screaming for air. He clenched his hands into fists, even planted his foot and gritted his teeth, but the longer he stood there bracing himself, the less able he felt to face his friend again.

Haru waited five minutes, ten minutes by the wall, but Makoto did not come. A clock in the hallway kept score for him, and when Haru could no longer justify his own shameful cowardice, he clenched his fists again and slipped back into the bathroom one more time to check on Makoto. He expected to find him still standing by the sink, but his friend now huddled by the opposite wall, those large, strong arms curled around his legs to keep them from trembling so much. Makoto seemed to have calmed down somewhat. His teeth no longer chattered and he was staring quietly into space, but Haruka remained shackled to his hiding place behind the wall, unable to approach him. There was nothing he could do or say to Makoto. Rin was one thing, but this… how could anyone forgive him for _this?_

Haruka retreated as silently as he had come, and returned to the others a few minutes later, but as Makoto was nowhere to be seen, Rei and Nagisa abandoned the front of the pool and hurried over to him with Kou in tow. Their faces were tense. Haruka, too, was very pale, looking just as ill as he did a few weeks ago.

“Haru-chan, where’s Mako-chan?” asked Nagisa, his face scrunching up.

“Is he alright? Does he need assistance?” added Rei. Haru shook his head.

“Leave him alone,” he said, his voice thick and unnecessarily sharp. “He’ll be back when he’s ready.” He then hurried past them towards the starting block. He needed to stop thinking. He needed the water.

* * *

They had managed some three or four rounds by the time the door at the far end opened. After a moment of hesitation in the doorway, Makoto stepped into the pool area, frightfully pale, but otherwise calm as he walked towards the others with slow, careful steps. Captain Mikoshiba spotted him first and nodded to Nitori, waiting patiently for Makoto to reach his teammates. Haruka was just making his turn to swim back towards the start block, but Nagisa and Rei caught the nod and followed Mikoshiba’s gaze. When they finally noticed Makoto, both jumped up and hurried over with Kou to welcome him back.

“Mako-chan..!” sighed Nagisa in relief, almost teary-eyed as Makoto nodded to them and sank down on the nearest bench.

“Tachibana-san, welcome back,” said Rei, doing his best to look cheerful.

“Here, Tachibana-senpai,” said Kou, who brought him a towel to wipe his face. Makoto thanked her and tried for a smile, but it was lopsided and faint.

“Are you alright?” asked Mikoshiba when he at last walked over to them. Makoto’s half-smile faltered.

“I think so..” he said, his voice hoarse and quiet. Mikoshiba gave him a reassuring look.

“Do you want to give it another try?”

“He’s had _enough,_ ” came Haruka’s voice from behind him, so unnaturally demanding as to make Seijuurou stop and turn to him. Haruka stood a few feet away, frozen into a glare, his skin still dripping from having just climbed out of the pool. Mikoshiba paused, but eventually nodded and turned back to Makoto one last time.

“Alright. Listen,” he began, “in case you want to come back later, lane seven is free. You won’t be timed, so if you feel up to it, get in and swim any way you want.” Then, before anyone could reply in acknowledgement or protest, he headed back to the front in a swift stride. “ _Next!_ ”

It was Rei’s turn, so he had no choice but to run off after Seijuurou. Makoto stared after them and his hands curled into loose fists he could not clench, his eyes boring into the floor.

“I… guess I will try that lane, then,” he said slowly, looking at no one as he shifted his arms to push himself to his feet.

“ _Stay there!_ ” snapped Haruka, his hand twitching forward to halt him. The sound of his voice made Kou wince. The others, too, stared at him wide-eyed as Makoto lifted his head with a look of confusion and what seemed almost like fear. Haru tensed, lowering his hand.

“Just rest.. alright?” he said, trying to sound less harsh, less angry. It didn’t work. His own voice rang forced and embarrassed in his ears, but Makoto stopped and remained where he was, his hands now idling in his lap and his eyes back on the ground.

“Haru-chan…” whispered Nagisa. Haruka lowered his head. Nagisa shook his, but in the end, both sat down on the bench to stay with Makoto and watch Rei swim.

* * *

When Rei finished, Nagisa relieved him and Kou stood up to accompany him to the front, the two talking in hushed voices. The walk was long enough to leave Haruka and Makoto by themselves for half a minute, but Haruka still sat there in heavy silence, as though his throat had filled with sand. The opportunity flittered past. Rei joined them by the bench, removing his goggles to adjust the strap.

“You will be next, Haruka-senpai,” he said in a hesitant tone. Haruka tensed, his fists firmly clenched.

“It’s okay,” he said, not looking up. “You go next, Rei.”

“But, Haruka-senpai—”

“I said it’s fine,” replied Haruka, now shooting Rei a pleading look that the other finally understood.

“Very well, Haruka-senpai,” said Rei. He walked back to the front, and when Nagisa climbed out of the pool, Rei reached out for his arm to detain him for a moment, whispering something that eventually made Nagisa stop near the front, instead of going back to the bench as he had done before.

Haruka and Makoto continued to sit motionless as the others swam in their place, isolated and undisturbed, but though he searched his mind over and over, Haruka found nothing he could say, nothing to offer Makoto except a few guilty glances at the other. Back then, Rin tore himself away and ran off before Haruka could finish what he tried to tell him, but Makoto wasn’t running anywhere. He looked so tired and worn Haru would not have been surprised if he stayed on the bench for the rest of the day, and if he did, so would Haruka.

Nagisa finished and Haru was skipped again, still sitting wretched and tongue-tied by Makoto’s side, until…

“Haru..”

Makoto’s voice was barely above a whisper, but Haruka turned his head instantly. Makoto closed his eyes.

“I’m sorry I disappointed everyone, Haru.”

“You didn’t,” mumbled Haruka, his heart sinking to the pit of his stomach. Makoto shook his head, but his face looked eerily calm, as though his own feelings had grown tired with him.

“Why don’t we go together next..?” he said as he tried for another smile, still crooked and weak and horrible to look at. “While you dive, I’ll just get into the pool from the side.”

“You don’t have to,” replied Haru, his voice harder than he intended, but Makoto kept smiling, the same, tired smile that could not reach beyond the dark circles around his eyes.

“It’s okay, Haru. I can swim, I promise..” he said, his laugh quiet and raspy. “I’m just a terrible diver…”

_Next!_

Before Haru could protest, Makoto pushed himself off the bench and headed towards Nagisa, leaving the other no choice but to follow him. Haruka’s every urge protested it. He hoped, prayed Nagisa would stop them, but Nagisa simply looked relieved, and happily retreated to let them both pass. Makoto stopped on the side and crouched down, slipping into the water by degrees as Haru unwillingly climbed onto the starting block.

Makoto smiled up at him one last time, the curve of his mouth still weak and strange. Haru lowered his eyes in guilt.

“ _Go!_ ”


	15. EPISODE 3: Powerful Dolphin Kick! - Part 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For better or worse, Makoto stayed in lane seven for the rest of joint practice, swimming up and down the length of the pool in a slow, tentative breaststroke. The moment they started, Haruka flew past him effortlessly, completing his lap before Makoto could even finish the first turn, but when Rei came to relieve him, Haruka silently declined.

His request was acknowledged with a nod. To make up for all the rounds he had missed, Haru was allowed a few more speed runs, so when it was time to pass the baton, he did it with good grace and entered lane six with Seijuurou’s permission to float alongside Makoto.

Neither spoke. Haru was still searching for the right words while Makoto was concentrating too hard on staying afloat, but when he jerked to a sudden halt a few lengths later, Haruka stopped beside him.

“Are you alright?” he asked, his tone more gentle than it had been before. Makoto’s hand was gripping the side bar so hard his knuckles were turning white, but after a few deep breaths, he nodded.

“Just a sudden cramp,” he said, careful not to look at Haruka.

 _You’re a terrible liar_.

“You’re still anxious, aren’t you?” Haru said out loud, his eyes seeking the other’s. Makoto looked up at him bewildered, but after a moment’s hesitation, he hung his head and nodded. Haruka closed his eyes and let out a sigh, so relieved he thought his heart might burst. It was stage fright after all, without a doubt, anxiety over failing the dive in public, mixed with the side effects of a hard fall…

“You can get out of the pool now. Nobody’s going to judge you for it,” he said at last, but Makoto tensed and shook his head.

“I’d rather not, Haru.”

“Why?”

Makoto clenched his jaw, and after a long pause that had him coloring by degrees, he finally whispered, “I don’t want to sit on the bench like this. I’m almost _naked_ , Haru..!”

Haruka stared at him wide-eyed, his ears feeling dangerously hot. He managed an awkward hum in response, after which the two continued to swim side by side, stopping only when another ‘cramp’ caused Makoto to twitch and latch onto the side bar for support. Neither cared what the others thought anymore, had indeed forgotten about everyone else, completely unaware that far above on the spectators’ balcony, Rin watched them with a mixture of shock and brewing hatred.

* * *

Makoto and Haruka had managed at least three more laps before Captain Mikoshiba blew his whistle three times, signaling to all swimmers that practice was officially over. Nitori turned off his stop watch, told the last swimmer his time, and after a nod from his captain, he hurried over to Makoto in lane seven.

“Come with me, please,” he said with a smart bow. Makoto blinked, then nodded in understanding, looking back at Haruka one last time before he hoisted himself out of the pool. Haru’s eyes followed him until Makoto and Nitori disappeared into the hallway, then fell to the water with a sigh, and after a moment’s consideration, he drifted to the closer wall and kicked himself away. Seijuurou stared and shook his head. Haruka’s last fast and furious spurt towards the other side made his prior floating seem like slow motion.

He, Nagisa, and Rei soon headed to the changing rooms, leaving Kou to thank Captain Mikoshiba for hosting what was probably their first and last joint practice with Samezuka. Makoto was nowhere to be seen, but when they left the changing rooms fully clothed, they glimpsed him entering the pool area one last time, in the green Iwatobi High School tracksuit he had worn before. He walked straight over to Captain Mikoshiba, where Kou stepped aside to let them talk. Makoto bowed.

“I’m sorry I caused so much trouble,” he said quietly. Mikoshiba chuckled good-naturedly.

“Not at all,” he said with an apologetic grin, his voice less loud and grating than it had been. “Go home and get some rest, you’ll be fine in no time.”

Nagisa and Rei took Makoto’s nod to the captain as their cue to say their thanks and goodbyes, filling in for their own captain, who had nothing to share beyond a glare at Mikoshiba. They soon exited the indoor pool followed by a pair of hard red eyes, but nobody was thinking about Rin anymore. Their leave was as silent as their arrival had been loud and cheerful, keenly conscious of the green elephant in their midst, but at a complete loss as to what to say to him. Haruka’s words were still lodged in his throat, Rei and Kou were too polite, not to mention too shy to bring up the incident, and Nagisa seemed to bide his time for the proper moment, but no opportunity presented itself. The only one who had any right to initiate was Makoto, and he exercised his right to be silent.

* * *

The atmosphere remained uncomfortable and oppressive all the way to the train station, from whence they travelled several stops without a syllable spoken between them, as if the time frame for apologies had now stretched completely beyond their reach. Nagisa was dying to talk and so made a few attempts at casual conversation, but he was trying in vain to put anyone at ease. Makoto continued to fix his eyes anywhere except at the others, his fists occasionally clenching, then growing lax in resignation.

Nagisa’s attempts to break the silence might not have succeeded, but in the end, Kou found some words of necessity that managed to pierce the ice.

“Our stop is next, right?” she asked in a small voice.

“I believe so, Kou-san,” replied Rei, and as if on cue, Makoto sprung up from his seat before any of them could make a move.

“I have to go now, everyone,” he said, then added, his eyes on the ground, “I’m sorry I let you down. I hope you will find a fourth member soon.”

“Mako-chan..” mumbled Nagisa. Haru clenched his jaw.

“Goodbye,” said Makoto, and now that he had an excuse to leave, he turned his back on them and proceeded into the next coach ahead.

“Haru-chan, go _talk_ to him,” whispered Nagisa as Rei reached up to signal their next stop. Haruka tensed and turned his head, staring at the door that had closed behind Makoto. He would have rather given the other space when Makoto so obviously needed it, not to mention Haruka himself was to get off at the next stop, but Nagisa and Kou caught him in a crossfire of pleading stares, until Haru let out a defeated sigh and rose from his seat.

“Good luck, Haruka-senpai,” said Rei from his station by the door. Haru rolled his eyes, but as the first-years gathered around Rei, Haruka made his way into the next coach. Makoto seemed to have moved further since, but after some shuffling through the crowd in the middle, Haruka finally found him in the very end of the first coach, where Makoto was busy tugging on his standard high school jacket. Haruka stopped behind a couple of businessmen, his eyes fixed on his friend. The train stopped, the doors opened, and out stepped Makoto, having not only put a good distance between himself and the others, but made himself less conspicuous by switching bright green to boring dark gray.

Haruka hurried down the steps of the backdoor after him. The chase now began in earnest, for as soon as Makoto managed to get through the crowd on the platform, he broke into a sprint and Haruka had no choice but to run after him as fast as he could. It was entirely too much effort, his burning lungs and stiff feet told him so, but there was still a shred of hope for this ill-managed business. Bent as Makoto was on escaping them, he was running along Haruka’s usual route. _He might look back any minute now_ , thought Haruka. Labored as his breath was.. Makoto.. might… hear him…

But Makoto didn’t look back, nor did he seem to hear the other panting some ways behind him. Once he had left the bay behind, his pace slackened, until he was treading familiar roads and alleyways in a more casual stride. He never once stopped to catch his breath, or do anything that could have justified the course he had taken, but there was no mistaking it: he had chosen a path that was slowly but steadily leading to Haruka’s house. Haru’s heart clenched as the two of them began climbing the road uphill. Just a few more turns and Makoto would reach the stone steps… but _why?_

Not far from the bottom of the stone stairs, Makoto stopped, crouching down to brush his fingers over a few wildflowers growing along the path. After a pause, he plucked a few, gathering them into a small bouquet. His strange errand complete, Makoto continued his journey towards the stone steps. He never noticed Haruka.

Behind him, Haru’s chest became tighter every second. He wanted to tell the other to stop, to just go home and rest, but the further Makoto went, the deeper those words sank in Haruka’s throat. In another minute, the stone steps swam into view. They were now just a turn away from the single torii that led to Haruka’s door, and Makoto was still pressing onwards… only to stop just short of the steps, turn right to take another, shorter flight of steps, and disappear through the gate of a house Haruka passed by every day on his way to school.

Haru broke into a cold sweat at his friend’s sudden change of course, but followed him up those narrow steps, peeking above the unknown gate to see Makoto kneel down by a spot in the yard. He stayed there for a minute, moving very little, but when he finally rose, Haruka spotted a larger, moss-covered stone and a small glass bottle holding flowers, the very ones Makoto had picked along the way. His friend then proceeded to the entrance, a few wilted daisies hanging from his hand. He opened the door and called inside, where two voices immediately cried _Onii-chan!_ in happy unison. A little girl and boy rushed over to the door and seized Makoto by his hands, and a moment later he was gone, leaving wide-eyed Haruka frozen by the gate.

He stood there for an eternity, staring up at the house. Did Makoto really live here..? _But this is… this is…!_

Haruka hurried down the steps and up the stone stairs towards his own house at a frantic pace, his eyes fixed on the wooden gate as though he feared losing sight of it. Keeping his head turned backwards as he climbed almost made him dizzy, but he didn’t stop until he conquered the stairs and the path to his own house. The front door slammed shut behind him. Haruka ran upstairs, and sure enough he spotted the other house with ease from his bedroom window, its gate and roof unmistakable from across the stone steps.

_So he lived here this whole time… and we’ve never even met once._

Haru’s knees wobbled, then buckled under him and he dropped to the floor, his heart sinking to the pit of his stomach. How could he have been so blind..? And to think he had sent Makoto home just before dinner every day during his visits, imagining or even wishing the guy to live miles away on the other side of Iwatobi, where it would take him an hour to get home on time instead of thirty seconds if he walked. Oh, how Makoto must have laughed at him for being so blind… and how fast he ran today, just to leave Haru behind…

Haruka forced himself to his feet and turned back to the window. He fixed his eyes on the yard, unable to discern its details from so high up, but imagining he might have spotted a glimpse of the glass bottle in the sunset. What a strange thing to have in a yard, he thought, this small glass bottle filled with fresh flowers as if they had been brought as an offering, yet it was all too plain, too small and rudimentary for a shrine. What was it then? _A grave?_ That would have made the moss-covered rock the tombstone, and the flowers would have been in remembrance of something small, like a family pet. Was it a dog? A cat? Maybe fish…? Haru was becoming curious. It was a larger family with younger children, and the house had a spacious yard. The pet (or pets) could have been anything. Was it Makoto’s pet? And what caused Makoto to think of it from so far away, picking flowers before he was even within view of the house?

If he thought of what happened, about the water… then it might have been fish. Staring at the grave, Haru felt strangely certain that Makoto had fish.

Haruka eventually left the view behind, but the rest of his day passed in agony. When he could finally bring himself to make dinner and cracked an egg into the pan, he could hear the echo of that sickening crunch as Makoto crashed into the water. As he picked up a clump of fried rice with his chopsticks, he thought of how his friend’s legs trembled in the bathroom, until Haru’s own fingers began to tremble too. He thought of the dirty sink and the tears running down Makoto’s face, of wilted daisies and week-old bruises visible to anyone who looked, and when he finally went to bed, he lay awake thinking of how Makoto apologized over and over and no one else did, how no one else said even once that they were sorry.

* * *

Makoto himself spoke little during dinner, and retired to his room right afterwards, but he barely had time to change into his pajamas and lie down before his little siblings came knocking on the door. Entry was never denied, not even at the worst of times, so the twins quickly scampered inside to crawl onto Onii-chan’s bed, careful not to touch his lower back as they curled up by his shoulders. Each put one arm around Makoto’s neck, locking him into a hug. Makoto let them.

“Onii-chan..?” spoke Ran, bravest of the two.

“Hm..?”

“How did it go?”

Makoto sighed. “It didn’t go as well as I had hoped.”

“What happened? …Did they make you swim?” asked Ren.

“They did.”

The twins gasped in unison.

“But Onii-chan never swims! You even have bruises!”

“The captain at Samezuka Academy said bruises were no excuse not to swim,” explained Makoto. His siblings gawked at him as though it were the most outrageous thing they had ever heard.

“What a horrible guy!” said Ran, but Makoto shook his head.

“I’m sure he meant well, Ran,” he said quietly, unsure if he himself believed it half as much as he wished to. “He couldn’t have known I didn’t want to swim when I went there with a team of swimmers as their fourth member.”

Ran huffed and made a face.

“I still don’t like him,” came her final verdict, after which she clung to Onii-chan just a little tighter. Ren hummed in agreement and gave Makoto’s shoulder a gentle squeeze.

“What will you do now, Onii-chan?”

“I don’t know. I guess I’ll go back to running and pole vaulting,” said Makoto, lowering his eyes. There was a long pause.

“It’s a shame, though…” he said at last into the fold of his arms, his eyes gleaming in the light. “Haru put so much faith in me.. but in the end, I’m not even cut out to be filler.”

Ran and Ren exchanged worried glances, and they all fell silent.

* * *

The next morning, Haruka got up at dawn. He hurried down, made breakfast, packed his schoolbag and left his house earlier than he had ever done for class, hurrying down towards Makoto’s house with its wooden walls and grave in the yard. He reached the single torii and passed it by a handful of steps, staying high enough to keep an eye on the front door. The plan was simple. Haruka would wait for Makoto appear, then come walking down the stairs as though he were just passing at the exact same time by sheer coincidence. Should Makoto join him, they would finally talk. And if he didn’t, and ran away like yesterday… then at least Haru would know that he had lost him forever.

And so Haruka waited, and waited, and waited, until almost half an hour later, Makoto slipped through the front door at last, looking nowhere but the ground in front of himself as he drifted towards the gate in silence. It was only when he arrived at the steps that some playful breeze brushed against his cheek, coaxing him to look up, only to find Haruka idling on the stairs just above his house, seemingly lost in some faraway view.

“Haru..!” he called out in shock. Above him, Haruka flinched, painfully conscious he had missed his cue. He turned stiffly to look at Makoto, but before he could move, Makoto began climbing the stairs towards him, as if some invisible force propelled him towards Haruka. Makoto stopped just a few steps below, his eyes still wide in surprise.

“Have you been standing there this whole time?”

“Yeah,” mumbled Haruka, turning his head just a little. Makoto blinked.

“Did you know I was coming..?”

“…No,” came the embarrassed reply.

“Then why were you—”

“I was watching the sunrise,” blurted Haruka, his cheeks growing hot as Makoto quirked his brow, then climbed higher to check out the view. The sun was slowly emerging, but most of its splendor and flare was still hidden by sleepy clouds. _Poetic in its own way, but not really much to look at_ , thought Makoto. He turned his head back to Haruka, but though he said nothing, Haru could tell Makoto was carefully turning the pages, and waited patiently until Makoto cocked his head, a smile forming across his lips: a real smile, his best smile.

“It _is_ pretty, I suppose,” he said at last, and Haruka let out a small sigh of relief. He then shifted towards the path leading downhill, and Makoto joined him with a hum – an inarticulate thank you –, so the two of them could begin their slow descent towards the bay.

They were half way down the hill when Haru finally braced himself with a deep breath.

“Are you alright?” he asked quietly, his eyes drifting to Makoto’s lower back. His friend nodded.

“I am now, Haru… Sorry I worried you.”

“Stop apologizing,” said Haru, giving Makoto a glare. “Don’t apologize when you’ve done nothing wrong. It’s stupid.”

“Okay,” replied Makoto, his voice gentle and tame. Haruka’s eyes fell to the ground.

“How’s your back?”

“I think it’s feeling a little better,” said Makoto, straightening himself in his stride. “The captain was right. Swimming did help loosen the muscles.”

Haru gritted his teeth before he could say anything unpleasant and derogatory about the Captain of Samezuka Academy, wondering if Mikoshiba had ever made his own team swim with injuries. His mind made a leap to Rin doing the backstroke with water-proof casts on, and Haruka made a strange face that finally coaxed a chuckle out of Makoto.

“What are you thinking about?” he asked, his tone amused. Haru turned his head.

“Take a guess,” he said off-handedly. Makoto hummed in thought.

“That Samezuka’s captain must be his team’s worst nightmare if he makes his guests swim off their injuries,” he replied, grinning when Haru turned back to him just a little too quickly, eyes wide and mouth open. “Well? Was I close, Haru?”

“Shut up,” said Haruka, struggling to suppress the obnoxious smile that was tugging at his lips. Makoto laughed again and Haru turned his head. The smile won in the end, even if it only lasted a second.

They walked on in silence after that, but it was the same comfortable silence they had shared many times before, both losing themselves in the hillside’s winding view. The rays of the rising sun soon pierced the clouds like a myriad of shining arrows, covering everything in bright yellow, and Haruka watched in wonderment as it painted Makoto with a radiant glow. He continued to walk by Haru’s side, his head bobbing with every step, and yet he felt like just another part of the scenery, the pulse of the world around him. Somewhere in the distance, Haru could hear bird song. Everything around them was coming alive.

* * *

Haru hardly knew how, but that morning had passed just like any other. Makoto seemed the same, too, no matter how he might have felt. He was kind as always, he talked when he was prompted, and when lunch time came around, he shared his dessert. They never once mentioned swimming or track. Makoto’s duffel bag was resting by his chair, but Haruka said nothing, his head full of selfish thoughts that were as useless as wishing Captain Mikoshiba had even the slightest shred of decency. _If the captain hadn’t forced Makoto to swim…_

“I’m off, Haru,” came Makoto’s voice once he put on his backpack and pulled the duffel bag over his shoulder. “I’ll see you on Monday.”

“Okay,” said Haru, anchored into place as he watched Makoto walk towards the door.

“Makoto..!”

The other turned back from the doorway that seemed miles and miles from Haruka’s desk.

“Yes, Haru?”

_…he wouldn’t be hopelessly drifting away._

“Good luck,” said Haruka, unable to look him in the eye lest Makoto see right through those empty words, and realize that Haru couldn’t be happy for him, not even a little.

* * *

Makoto was already standing in line to pole vault when the four members of the Iwatobi Swim Club passed through the gate one by one, settling down on the nearest bench to watch him. Haruka originally intended to go home and drown his sorrows in the bathtub, but the moment he left class, the first-years came hurrying over in the obvious hope of seeing Makoto. They were the ones who suggested visiting him down at the track field, and Haruka yielded with a sigh. If not him, then perhaps someone else would finally find the words for the apology Makoto deserved to hear, though nobody offered to get his attention. Everyone watched him in silence as he at last assumed his position at the starting point, his pole held high as though he wanted to lance the sky.

“Looks like Mako-chan is feeling much better,” said Nagisa, excited to watch him jump again. Everyone’s eyes were now on the runway, breaths held and fists clenched.

_3… 2… 1._

Makoto rushed forward just as aggressively as he had done before, stabbing the pole violently into the take-off box to launch off the ground. The pole curled under him – Haruka gritted his teeth –, Makoto’s legs came swinging upward… and his feet collided with the crossbar, sending it soaring across the length of the mattress and rolling away behind it. The uprights wobbled for a moment, then toppled over helplessly on either side, meeting the ground with a thunderous crash. Makoto lost some momentum, but somehow managed to land safely on the mattress, rolling onto his side as students scampered left and right to avoid being hit by equipment gone wild.

“I guess that’s _one_ way of clearing the crossbar…” mumbled Rei, his hand pressed to his face.

“He cleared it alright, he knocked it out of sight!” cheered Nagisa, pumping his fists in the air.

“He’s alright..” sighed Haru in relief when Makoto rose from the mattress in one piece, having avoided the fallen pole by mere inches.

“His legwork is amazing,” gushed Kou, her cheeks lightly flushed. “Look at those calves…” she cooed dreamily while Makoto was being yelled at by the coach, who snatched the pole away from him and whipped a finger towards the outer ring. Makoto left the center field with his head hanging, then broke into a sprint along the outer edge, still showing no signs of being aware he had company. It was only in the turn that the others swam into the corner of his vision, but he might have still passed them had it not been for Nagisa, who jumped in front of Makoto at the last few meters.

“Mako-chaaan, _stoooppp!_ ” he cried with flailing arms until Makoto skidded to a halt, kicking up an impressive cloud of dust in the effort.

“Hazuki-kun!” he cried in surprise, turning his head to see— “Haru..! Everyone…”

Now that they had Makoto’s attention, Nagisa looped arms with him, pulling him over. All eyes now fixed on him, some more eager than others.

“What are you all doing here?” asked Makoto, his own eyes never leaving his dirty sneakers. “Did you all come here to see me..?”

“We did, Mako-chan,” said Nagisa, giving Makoto’s bicep an enviable hug. “Everybody was really worried about you yesterday, so we had to come and make sure you were okay.”

“You were all worried?” repeated Makoto, his eyes and tone shifting. “I’m sorry…”

He could almost feel Haruka’s glare of disapproval. Makoto shot him an apologetic glance at once, but that only made Haru frown harder.

“But that’s not the only reason we came, Mako-chan,” said Nagisa as he turned to Rei, who now stood and straightened himself to fulfill his obligations as vice-captain.

“We would like to officially request that you join the swim club!” he blurted, performing a deep bow to Makoto, who reeled backwards in shock.

“Huh?!” he cried, his cheeks paling. “But… but yesterday, I let everybody down…”

“You didn’t,” said Haru, still frowning.

“Nagisa-kun and I thought about your pole vaulting technique, Tachibana-san,” explained Rei, adjusting his glasses with a smile. “You seem to rely on brute strength and powerful dynamic movement, which would make you the ideal backstroke swimmer for our team!”

“Eh?!”

“We all specialize in one stroke each, you see,” Rei carried on. “Haruka-senpai swims the front crawl, or what we call ‘freestyle,’ Nagisa-kun swims breaststroke, and I swim butterfly stroke, but medley relays require backstroke as well, which would be the perfect stroke for someone like you.”

“There’s no diving for backstroke, you see,” added Nagisa, causing Makoto to turn his head in embarrassment. “So what do you say, Mako-chan? You’ll get to be the uh, the aah… _oh,_ what was that thing Rin-chan always said he was?”

“The alpha,” said Haru quietly.

Makoto quirked an eyebrow, unsure if he liked the mention of Rin at a time like this.

“That’s right!” said Nagisa with a grin. “Backstroke starts the relay, so that means you get to be the alpha, and Haru-chan is the omega since he goes last! Well, what do you say?”

“No diving in backstroke, huh…” muttered Makoto as he lowered his eyes to Haruka, who had turned his head the moment that old memory was mentioned, and hadn’t looked at any of them since.

“Haru..” said Makoto, his voice low. Haruka tensed. “Do you really want me on your team..?”

Haruka’s heart gave a leap, his body twitching upward as though he were moving in a dream.

“After what happened,” he breathed, “you would still join the swim club..?”

Makoto’s hands clenched. Everyone went silent, still heavy with the weight of that Thursday afternoon, but Makoto took a deep breath and nodded resolutely, his face as solemn as his promise was set in stone.

“I will, if you really do need a fourth person,” he said quietly. “Nobody wants me on the track team, anyway…”

Haruka stared at him wordlessly, his eyes wide and gleaming, but once he recovered from his shock, he took a deep breath and slowly reached a hand into his pocket, his fingers clenching around the same strap of Iwatobi-chan he had once offered to everyone in class. He held it out for Makoto to take, and when his friend didn’t reach for it immediately, Haru bit his lip and pressed it against Makoto’s chest, until the other had no choice but to claim his prize. Nagisa and Rei looked at each other, then to Kou, all of them grinning.

“Welcome to the Iwatobi Swim Club, Makoto,” said Haru, his voice strangely thick. Silence fell on them, and the next moment, Makoto stepped forward and wrapped his arms tightly around Haruka.

“Oi..” came Haru’s voice from behind a wall of firm muscle surrounding him on all sides, soon joined by the first-years who clung to Makoto like persistent, affectionate barnacles, sealing Haruka inside. “Let go already…”

“Thank you, Haru,” gushed Makoto, his own voice choked and warm, and since he had nowhere to turn his head, Haruka buried his flushed face in Makoto’s shoulder, hoping nobody saw how stupid they must have looked, huddled together like a human anthill.

 

**_TO BE CONTINUED…_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 


	16. FrFr! - Haruka's Phone Call!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A short bonus chapter in honor of Haruka's birthday (thought it is sadly not birthday-related). It takes place two days after Makoto joined the Iwatobi Swim Club.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Sunday, May 19, 2013.**

After the fatigues of preparing and eating lunch on Sunday, Haruka decided to lay down for an afternoon nap. However, just as he had settled on his bed, the phone on his nightstand rang out like a siren. It was his mother, calling to check on him as she had done every Sunday, and so Haru picked up the phone with a sigh, holding it languidly to his ear.

“Afternoon,” he muttered into the speaker as he shuffled off the bed and perched himself by the window, trying to immerse himself in the scenery, now that his nap had been sabotaged and postponed indefinitely.

“Haruka..!” came his mother’s voice, animate as ever. “How are you?”

“Fine. ..You?”

“Your father and I are doing well, very well. Is everything alright?”

“Yeah.”

“How’s the swim club doing? Have you found a fourth member yet?”

“Yeah,” replied Haruka, his forehead bonking against the glass. His eyes fell on the wooden gate of that now familiar house across the stone stairs. “Makoto joined.”

“Makoto? Makoto who?”

Haru colored, his eyes drifting away from the yard with its glass bottle and goldfish grave.

“Tachibana Makoto. ..He’s in my class.”

“Oh? I remember you mentioning someone called Tachibana before…” mused his mother. “I think you said he sounded like me because he’s so sensible.”

“No, _you_ said he was sensible. I just said he sounded like you when you’re nagging.”

“Haruka…!”

“ _What._ ”

“Never mind,” sighed his mother. “Is he a good swimmer?”

“..No. No, he’s not.”

“Why did he join, then?” she groused. Haruka’s eyes fell on the floor.

 _Because of me_ , he thought to himself, but bit his lip lest the words slip out.

“We needed a fourth member, so he offered to join.”

“Ah I see,” said his mother, her tone so disappointed it made Haru grit his teeth. “Sorry to hear you couldn’t find anyone decent. At this rate you won’t be able to go to tournaments. Such a shame, Haruka… You and your friends would be capable of so much more! We should have sent you to a swimming school after all…”

Haru’s face gradually darkened. He fixed his eyes on Makoto’s house again, a small flame of defiance burning in his heart.

“He’ll be fine. He just needs to practice.”

“If you say so, Haruka.” _What’s with the resigned tone?_ thought Haru, still staring at the house as though its many dim windows could tell him which ones were hiding his friend. Was it the cluster to the left or the right..?

“Mother..” he began, his tone cautious and nonchalant.

“Yes?”

“He lives across from the house. Right by the stone steps.”

“…Does he?” came the distant reply after a short but suspicious pause. Was it surprise or hesitation? Haru pursed his lips.

“Did you know he lived here?”

“No..? The name didn’t sound very familiar… I don’t think I’ve ever met his family,” replied his mother. “Why?”

“How come you’ve never met his family when they live right across from us?” pressed Haru, his voice no longer as calm or neutral as he wished it to be.

“They might have moved in recently, Haruka.”

“Nobody new has moved here in years,” replied Haru, his tone accusing. His mother huffed.

“I guess we just never crossed paths, that’s all,” she said, her tone so indignant Haru could almost see the defensive shrug of her shoulders. “It’s not like this has ever been a very social neighborhood and you never were a friendly boy, Haruka. No matter where we took you, how many children you were introduced to, you just wandered off to be by yourself or find some water to climb into!”

Haru scowled, but when he looked over to the house again, that scowl softened into a childish pout. His long pause made his mother sigh.

“Tell me about this Tachibana, then. What does he look like?”

Haru turned his head from the house, as if in grave danger of being heard by Makoto from across the stone stairs.

“Olive green hair. Green eyes. Tall. Muscular,” he said slowly, his impressions of Makoto in that Samezuka speedo still vivid and hard to ignore.

“Tall and muscular is nice, but that hair sounds so plain…” sighed his mother, who had been utterly spoiled by her happy and successful marriage to her college sweetheart, a man with dark hair and piercing blue eyes. “Is he handsome?”

Haru’s cheeks grew uncomfortably hot.

“He’s handsome,” he said, his tone strained.

“Is he nice?”

“...Yeah,” said Haruka, his voice softened. “Too nice.”

“Are you friends then?”

“Yeah.”

“Did you ask me about his family because you’re upset you haven’t known him until this year?”

“…I don’t know.”

His mother scoffed, this time in amusement.

“You’re a terrible liar, Haruka,” she said gently. “Well, better late than never, son. But you really were such an antisocial boy..! You didn’t seem to like anyone, not even your swimming club friends, that Matsuoka boy and those other ones.”

Haru sighed, his eyes narrowing at the mention of Rin’s name. His mother had only met his teammates once, indeed had been the instigator in inviting them for an afternoon, yet soon forgot their names – and after that fateful encounter in winter, Haruka spoke of Rin and the others no more.

“I _am_ glad though,” continued his mother, completely unfettered by her son’s uneasy silence. “At least now there’s someone sensible nearby who can come over in an emergency. Is he dependable?”

“Yeah..” sighed Haru. His mother hummed.

“Well, he may be a little plain, but I like the sound of him, Haruka! Keep him close. You can never have enough dependable people in your life. Maybe he can keep you out of trouble better than we could.”

“I’m not in trouble,” said Haru in a sharp tone.

“Oh _really?_ How many places have banned you again?” retorted his mother. Haru clenched his fist. _Touché._ “ _Well,_ Haruka?”

“The aquarium, the pet store, those sea food restaurants by the bay… and the home improvement store.”

“The home improve— _Haruka..!_ ”

“ _What?_ ”

“You never mentioned the home improvement store!” cried his mother, but when Haru merely huffed in reply, she settled for a loud groan and a sigh. “Take the Tachibana boy with you next time. I hope he’s well-built for this sort of thing.”

Haruka clenched his jaw, his ears feeling a little too warm, but his eyes slipped back to the windows of Makoto’s house. As if he and Makoto would ever go anywhere by themselves. _What a ridiculous idea…_

“Well, good luck with swimming, son,” said his mother next. “I hope you will take it seriously and practice. It’s been so long since you have gone to a tournament, you really ought to do something with yourself, Haruka.”

“I will.”

“That Tachibana boy had better practice hard. You can’t afford to be held back. You are so talented, it kills me to see that talent go to waste!”

“ _It won’t._ ”

“Alright, alright. I’m hanging up now, I still need to go shopping. Take care of yourself, son. Your father says hi.”

“Alright. Bye.”

“Bye bye.”

Haruka pressed _End Call_ and the phone slipped onto his writing desk with a tired _Thud!_ , its owner resting his head on his arms by the windowsill. He could have gone back to bed now. Nothing would have stopped him, but he remained there for a little while longer, wondering what would have been if he and Makoto had met when they were children. Would they have liked each other enough to be friends?

Haru pursed his lips. With Makoto’s patience, perhaps they would have.


	17. EPISODE 4: Captive Orca! - Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  
> 
> Another edit to fit the chapter. Enjoy!

Makoto quit the track team that very afternoon, just as content with his decision as the track coach, who readily released him and wished him good luck at the swim club, where any split kickboards, broken buoys or mangled lane rope would no longer be any financial or administrative concern of his. The quick and easy dismissal would have normally embarrassed Makoto, making him feel inadequate and unwanted, but just this once, he was thankful for it. With kind, friendly people waiting for him to join them instead, he simply let the coach’s blatant relief fuel his own resolve. All things considered, his desire to cling to his moment of triumph was just as strong as his friends’ desire to permanently attach him, along with every benefit a fourth member granted to the swim club.

While he could revel in the idea that he was wanted and useful, Makoto was more than happy to shove all his regrets and apprehensions into the very back of his mind. To give any consideration to the future his ship set its course to as a swimmer representing Iwatobi High, to think of what was required of him in order to earn the friendship of his teammates, and what the term “practice” entailed from now on would have been dangerous… and like every source of danger in Makoto’s life, it had to be avoided for as long as possible.

Fortunately for Makoto, nature seemed to be on his side, and preserved his self-imposed ignorance for a little while longer, as the weather forecast could be prevailed upon to delay the start of their outdoor practice until June. Just to be safe, though, during his last two weeks of freedom, Makoto did his best to let all talk of swimming and water in one ear and straight out the other. Whenever Nagisa and Rei brought up the topic and solicited his input, Makoto always placed the greatest emphasis on spending time with everyone, and being glad that the others would get to swim together again. Rei and Nagisa were usually in too high spirits to take notice or action, but Haru had caught onto Makoto’s hedging and evasive maneuvers almost from the beginning. Nevertheless, he said nothing, his throat still tight with the memory of Makoto heaving by the sink, and the consciousness of how Haru had missed every opportunity to apologize to him. His only saving grace was that the sad event had led to an unspoken consensus between the rest of the team not to put Makoto on the spot again. While there was nothing to be done about actual swimming, everyone was happy to coddle their newest member and turn a blind eye to his obvious obfuscations for the present. Makoto seemed much happier that way, constantly surrounded by friendly faces that enjoyed his company and seemed to require no more than that, so while he was at the mercy of the weather, Haruka could not bear the idea of taking that away from Makoto. Time would snatch those rose-tinted goggles off his eyes soon enough, and Haru could only hope that when the time came, both of them would move on, though he sincerely doubted it. The more he listened to Makoto, the less willing the other seemed to face reality… and Haruka? His struggles were _infinitely_ worse. By this time, the idea of feeling the water again should have cast its alluring spell on him, but that once pristine pool of thought had been irreversibly tainted by guilt-laced flashbacks, and memories of Makoto swimming in that hideous Samezuka speedo. Indeed, Haru was now thinking of him almost as often as he thought of water, and the more space Makoto began to occupy in his thoughts, the more uncomfortable and defiant Haruka had become. Adamant as he was to secure his friend and make him an integral part of the swim club, he found himself growing just a little resentful of the green cuckoo that was threatening to push him out of his nest of comfort, when having to wait for the water was already trying Haruka’s patience.

As for Nagisa and Rei, the former looked forward to swimming with no reservations, but the latter began to experience some mild discomfort he was too ashamed to admit. Inclined though Rei was to occasionally correct Makoto and emphasize his involvement with a smile on his face, the time drew ever nearer when Rei would have to face his own shortcomings in the water, shortcomings that were absolutely unsightly in a vice-captain. Could he truly expect a senior student to trust and respect him, when despite years of training, Rei still needed a kickboard for everything except butterfly? The thought tortured him constantly, all the more so because Makoto’s constant shirking in the face of his obvious capabilities was slowly but surely grating on Rei’s nerves.

* * *

With June looming ever closer, come the last Friday of May, Nagisa innocently proposed in the morning that everyone have lunch on the roof together. Haru had no objections, so Makoto said yes with a smile on his face, not knowing the day had come when his picture-perfect world would finally unravel at the seams.

“This swim club meeting is now in session!” declared Nagisa once everyone had settled down in a circle by the wall, grinning from ear to ear as he motioned to Rei. “Over to you, Vice-Captain Rei-chan!”

“Thank you, Nagisa-kun,” said Rei, adjusting his glasses with a smirk. “As you are all aware, today’s weather forecast predicted optimal conditions for outdoor practice starting next week – except for the chance of some mild precipitation on Friday. Which means—”

“We can start swimming in the pool!” cried Nagisa, throwing his hands high into the air. Makoto’s hand twitched. He plucked up some rice the next moment not to seem suspicious, but he could not escape Haru’s watchful eye, or the small frown that followed.

“That’s right, Nagisa-kun! I was thinking it would be prudent for us to begin this coming Monday. Haruka-senpai, do we have your approval as captain?”

Haruka nodded, his gaze having returned to his lunch.

“Excellent!” replied Rei in an instant, glad to have the floor to himself again. “I expect all of you to gather at the pool after school and be suited by two o’clock.”

“May I join you?” asked Kou after a bite of her lunch.

“You are very welcome to attend, Kou-san,” came the cordial reply. “Your insights as our manager would be greatly appreciated.”

“Alright, I will meet you then!” said Kou with a dazzling smile and an ace up her sleeve, which now awaited its grand reveal on Monday.

“Wonderful! Now, are there any questions?”

“I have a question!” said Nagisa, raising his hand along with a half-eaten Iwatobi Cream Bread. “Does Mako-chan have a swimsuit?”

All eyes now fixed on Makoto, who swallowed hard and set down his chopsticks. He had been sitting in awkward silence ever since he realized that having lunch together was just a ruse for a swim club strategy meeting, but if being put on the spot wasn’t bad enough, the honest answer promised nothing but trouble.

“I’m afraid not,” he said at last. _Although…_ “I guess I will just have to join practice when I manage to get enough money to buy one..!” he added in a hopeful tone.

“There’s no need to wait that long, Mako-chan!” interrupted Nagisa, his enthusiasm much greater than Makoto felt warranted. “I have a lot of spare swimsuits at home, and I’m sure Rei-chan and Haru-chan have some, too. Why don’t we get together on Sunday at Haru-chan’s house and bring them so you can pick one?”

“That is a great idea, Nagisa-kun!” said Rei, smiling brightly. “It would be an excellent team building opportunity.”

“Can I come?” asked Kou, her mind now full of gorgeous, hard muscle.

“Is Kou-chan bringing swimsuits too?” asked Nagisa with a cheeky grin.

“Of course not!” Kou cringed in embarrassment. “I don’t have a spare like all of you! Besides, I don’t think my one-piece would quite fit Makoto-senpai…” she mused in a small voice. Makoto choked.

“Why _my_ house?” asked Haru with little more than curiosity, but Makoto latched onto his words like a lifesaver in a stormy sea.

“That’s true, we shouldn’t impose on Haru like that,” he stammered with a nervous smile. “Really it’s fine, everyone, I will see if I can buy a swimsuit next month—”

“Aww, come on, Haru-chan!” pleaded Nagisa puppy-eyed, but Haru didn’t even look at him. There was simply no need.

“Fine,” he replied the next moment, shooting a hard look at Makoto that said in no uncertain terms, _I won’t let you run away from this anymore._ He trusted the other to catch his meaning, but just to be safe, his voice was perfectly final as he added, “Come at three in the afternoon. I will be at home.”

Makoto clenched his jaw, but after a moment’s hesitation, he nodded without a sound. If even Haru was willing to sacrifice his time, Makoto had no room left for arguments, all too aware that he was being ungrateful and obstinate where he had no place to be.

“ _Hooraaay!_ ” cried Nagisa as he sprung to his feet and swung an arm around Makoto and Haruka. “This is gonna be fun, I can’t wait!” he said, squeezing their shoulders playfully. Rei fixed his glasses with a smirk.

“Excellent,” he said, sounding as satisfied as though he had arranged it all on his own. “I do believe this takes care of everything for our first practice session. I’m looking forward to seeing you all on Sunday!”

“Me too!” joined Kou, clapping her hands together.

The first-years soon left in high spirits and a trail of cheerful noise, heading back to their respective classrooms for sixth period. Makoto and Haru remained for a few more minutes, both silent until Haruka closed his eyes and simply said, his tone matter-of-fact,

“The sooner you start swimming again, the better.”

Makoto desperately begged to differ, but his own foolhardy decision to attach himself permanently to his friends now wired his jaws shut. He merely nodded in response, and when sixth period ended, he could just barely force out a short, strangled goodbye that grated on Haruka’s ears.

“Makoto,” he called after him, just as the other was about to step through the doorway to spend one more day in denial. Makoto turned back obediently, but there was nothing except discomfort written on his face. Haruka sighed.

“It’ll be fine,” he said, waiting for Makoto to cock his head to the side and _smile already_ , but all he received was a barely perceivable nod of the head. Makoto looked almost guilty as he turned away and Haruka stared at the empty doorway for a while, irked that he could once make Makoto leave the track team for the swim club with a grin on his face, but now couldn’t so much as coax a smile out of him.

* * *

Just weeks ago, the mere idea of others showing up at his house would have left Haruka restless and irritated. However, since he agreed to host and deemed the cause important to himself, he graciously tidied up the living room, wiped down the kitchen counters after lunch, then left for his room to track down every swimsuit that could even remotely fit Makoto. How small, thin Nagisa even dreamed of lending his own to a boy twice his size, Haruka would never know, nor did he wish to. He wanted to spare as little thought to Makoto’s pending struggles as possible, strangely uncomfortable that the other was coming to his house specifically to undress and try on swimsuits.

When Haruka at last found all five of his jammers, he tried them on one by one to retain the one that felt the best. He set that one aside and gathered the rest into a hasty stack, for the idea that Makoto would soon put them on and stretch them out made him flush and clench his jaw. It was as though time was looping backwards to trap Haruka in that well of frustration he had felt the first week of school, when everything about Tachibana Makoto annoyed him to no end, except such strong feelings no longer made any sense. Indeed, the more he found himself wondering about this newfound inner turmoil, the likes of which he had never felt before, the more Haru wanted the water to come and wash it all away.

Luckily for Haruka, he could soon redirect his irritation with the early arrival of the first-years, pretending that nothing plagued him more than Nagisa, Rei, and Kou making noise and cluttering the floor with their bags as they helped themselves to pillows from the cabinet. Haru himself left for the kitchen to put the kettle on, preparing a tray for them while Nagisa and Rei bickered over who would go first. They eventually decided to settle the matter with rock-paper-scissors, and after a chain of seven ties, Nagisa’s rock crushed Rei’s scissors. The order now sorted, all they could do was wait for tea and Makoto, who rang the bell at three o’clock sharp. Haruka went to open the door, where he finally got to see Makoto in casual clothes for the first time – a whole new world of loose t-shirts and tight-fitting jeans in plain, boring colors. Haru hardly know how much fashion sense he expected from a guy with a large orange plastic wrist watch, but he still cringed at the idea that, could his mother see Makoto right now, she would feel so justified in her opinion of his being absolutely plain.

“Good afternoon, Haru,” said Makoto, his voice subdued. Haruka merely hummed, stepping aside to let him pass.

As soon as Makoto appeared in the living room doorway, three bright, eager faces turned to him in unison.

“Welcome, Mako-chan!” waved Nagisa, grinning cheerfully at the victim. “Ready to try on some swimsuits?”

The truthful answer would have been a **_No_** howled at the top of his lungs, but Makoto did his best to feign interest and gratitude, sitting down on a spare pillow to take some tea with them before the try-ons would begin. He barely managed a few sips, though. Now that he was there, Nagisa made a show of moving his bag to his lap and staring at Makoto in great anticipation.

“After some consideration, we thought it might be best to use the kitchen as your changing room, Makoto-san, since it’s a closed space that opens straight to the living room,” Rei told Makoto, pushing his glasses back with a smile at their practical solution. Makoto nodded, then risked a glance at Haruka, but his friend had disappeared in the meantime. He only showed up a few minutes later, making his way back to the living room with a stack of swimsuits dangling from his arm.

“I’m up first, Haru-chan!” Nagisa wagged a finger at him. Haruka made a face, but sat down to wait while Nagisa rummaged around in his bag, and the others cleared the table so he could showcase his wares to Makoto.

“No peeking, Mako-chan!” said Nagisa with a grin, motioning for the other to look away. Makoto turned around patiently, almost glad nobody would see his growing discomfort, but when he was at last forced to face half a dozen tiny and obnoxious briefs and jammers, his candid expression of horror made Haruka turn his head for fear he was going to crack. On the far end, Kou turned her head for the same reason, while Rei lifted a hand to press his glasses back as far as they could go, suddenly glad he was a well-established member instead of a new recruit.

“Well, what do you think?” urged Nagisa. Makoto swallowed hard.

“I, uh.. I ah…” he stuttered, absolutely speechless at the tacky patterns. Was the white one even menswear? _It looks like a tie-on bikini bottom!_ He wished it back inside the bag it came from at once, but sure enough, Nagisa singled it out and held it up for him, his face shining with innocence.

“Why don’t you try this first, Mako-chan? I bet you’d look great in white!”

“N-No, that would never—” stammered Makoto, but the next moment, Nagisa stuffed the tiny white article in his hands and began pushing him towards the kitchen.

“I’ll give you the next one when you’re done!” he chirped as he pulled the kitchen screens closed behind him.

“Now wait a minute!” cried Makoto, but all he got in response was Rei saying loud enough to hear from beyond the door,

“Hurry up, Makoto-san, we have over a dozen swimsuits to go through!”

* * *

Five minutes later, the door creaked open just barely. Makoto stuck his head out with obvious hesitation, and the way his body was carefully tucked beyond the wall for cover was proof enough that he had made an honest attempt. Haruka and Kou now turned their heads for entirely different reasons, while Rei lifted a heavy hand to his face again, unable to look.

“It’s too small,” said Makoto in a pained voice and everyone colored except Nagisa, who leaned to the side with a curious squint. “ _Just trust me on this!_ ” snapped Makoto.

“Aww, that’s too bad,” said Nagisa with a sheepish grin. “Which one do you want next, Mako-chan?”

Makoto swallowed as he glanced at the table again, his face speaking volumes of how it was a choice between instruments of torture rather than suitable swimwear. He sighed.

“Can I have the one that looks like a controller?” he said at last, even reaching out a hand to point, hoping Nagisa was not really as cruel as his playful but discomforting antics seemed to suggest. He was momentarily relieved as Nagisa stood up and brought him the requested speedo. Once he put it on, finding it fit just barely, Makoto finally stepped out from behind the door, his hands clenching helplessly in front of him.

“This doesn’t fit me very well either,” he said quietly, but everyone was staring at him with varying degrees of approval, and Haruka, with burning ears.

“Not bad at all, Mako-chan!” said Nagisa cheerfully. “You should keep it with you just in case,” he added. Makoto suppressed a sigh. “Or do you want to try another one?”

“ _No-no-no_ , this is fine,” said Makoto a little too hastily, causing Nagisa to frown. “Does anyone else have swimsuits I can try…?”

“I shall be next, Makoto-san,” replied Rei. Nagisa huffed, but gathered the rest of his swimsuits with a pout, packing them away while Makoto closed the door to peel off the too-small swim brief he miraculously managed to squeeze himself into.

By the time Makoto pulled the door open again to wait behind it in his underwear, Rei had draped a few legskins across the table. Unlike Nagisa or Haruka, he magnanimously decided to display every single one he had, which was just as well, because Makoto’s choices were extremely limited. He immediately ruled out the rainbow stripes in his head, feeling too simple-minded for something of that caliber, and even less capable of wearing another one covered in purple butterflies. The third one, however, black with a stretch of purple and cyan, promised everything great and good after how he felt in Nagisa’s swim briefs.

“Go ahead and choose one, Makoto-san,” said Rei, his arms folded over his chest with glowing pride.

“I would like _that_ one,” pointed Makoto, then promptly received the legskin of his choice, which proved an infinitely better fit than the swim briefs could have ever hoped to be. When he stepped outside to show the others, he even did a small turn in it, his cheeks coloring at his own embarrassing display.

 _His abs are gorgeous,_ thought Kou, eyes sparkling and hands clasped tightly together. Even Nagisa, who had been pouting incessantly, managed to sound warm and earnest in his praise of Makoto, while Haruka remained silent, his eyes narrowed in what seemed to be disapproval, though of what, Makoto could not fathom. As for Rei, he pushed his glasses back with a smug smirk and internally congratulated himself on his superior fashion sense, which now trumped Nagisa’s victory in rock-paper-scissors with ease.

“I do believe we have a winner,” he said out loud, flashing a satisfied look at each person around him to hammer his success home. “This is clearly the best option considering—” he continued, but the moment he started talking again, Haruka rose to his feet, crossing the living room in a few hurried steps to shove his own jammers into Makoto’s hands.

“Try on these, too,” he cut off Rei, his tone curt and commanding as he locked Makoto into a stare. The other blinked in surprise, staring down at the black and purple pile.

“Are these all the same…?” he managed to say. Haru gave him a look.

“No, they’re not. They all fit _differently_ ,” he insisted, advancing at Makoto until he backed him sufficiently into the kitchen. “Try them all on and pick the one that feels the best.”

He then shut the door on Makoto and took his seat again, his arms curled around his knees. To his left, Nagisa shook his head with a grin, which Haruka ignored with a scowl.

* * *

Makoto did as he was told, appearing in the doorway four more times, but it might as well have been one, since nobody but Haru could tell the difference between each swimsuit. None of them complained, however, and Kou in particular was extremely pleased. Once he had tried on all four, Makoto stepped out fully clothed, the jammers now hanging off his arms in two piles.

“This one fit the best,” he nodded to his right arm, then offered the jammers on his left to Haruka, who took them with a small but poignant smile. Rei huffed.

“Did it fit best in comparison to the other three, or in comparison to _every_ swimsuit you have tried on, Makoto-san?” he asked, unable to resist a challenge. Haruka’s brow twitched indignantly. Nagisa let out a groan.

“Why don’t we just let him keep one each?” he whined, not wanting to finish last in the race of who would get to sponsor Makoto’s first swim practice. “Each swimsuit is best for certain strokes, right?”

Rei blinked at him, but soon fixed his glasses in contemplation.

“You are right, Nagisa-kun…” he said as he cupped his chin. “Swim briefs are most suitable for breaststroke, Haruka-senpai’s jammers seem very efficient for the front crawl, and legskins are always a stylish choice, not to mention the _ultimate_ choice for butterfly stroke and backstroke… Yes, I do believe Makoto-san might benefit most from alternating his swimwear to suit the stroke he practices.”

“Then it’s settled!” cheered Nagisa, glad his own contribution was approved. Even Haruka conceded to the compromise, placated by the thought that Makoto didn’t just say, _These are all the same_ in the end. At the idea that his friend _understood_ , Haruka’s earlier frustrations all but evaporated, now convinced that his own swimsuit was Makoto’s foremost choice.

As for Makoto himself, he forced down the rest of his tea, then said his goodbyes, soon leaving Haru’s house with the three chosen swimsuits to run all the way to his house in growing wretchedness and shame. No matter how much he steeled himself between sips of tea, he simply didn’t have the heart to tell them that nothing fit as well as Makoto had hoped, all of it having to do with proportions that should have flattered him in comparison but didn’t.

* * *

After a night of fitful sleep and embarrassing dreams, Makoto woke up at dawn. He gave up on rest and put on his clothes, passing through the gate at an unreasonable hour in his uniform, but he did not leave for school just yet. Instead he paced up and down the stone stairs between the bottom and the single torii, and after a few fruitless turns, he settled on the lowest step with his face cupped in his hands. A few minutes later, just as he was ready to give up, he finally heard the timid peep of a small white kitten that appeared in the neighborhood a few days ago. Makoto had approached it several times, but only managed to play with it on Saturday, and brief though their encounter was, the kitten seemed to remember him fondly, rubbing against him the very moment Makoto called out to it in a sweet, gentle tone. Makoto reached down and scratched the little one behind its pointy ears, and when the kitten pressed against his palm, he simply cupped it in his hands to cradle the tiny waif to his chest. His hands were large and warm, just the place for a nap, so the kitten nestled there without another sound, letting Makoto hold it in silence until Haruka arrived almost an hour later on his way to school.

He stopped a few feet from Makoto, staring at the kitten, but Makoto didn’t set it down or showed any sign of wanting to move. His greeting was too quiet. Haruka sighed.

“Let’s go, Makoto,” he said, his voice louder than the other’s had been. It was Makoto’s turn to sigh, but he unwillingly parted with the kitten, setting it gently down onto the steps and patting its back one more time in goodbye. His leave was followed by a squeaky serenade of longing mewls, so acute they nearly broke Makoto’s heart.

He and Haruka now walked side by side towards the bay in silence, but it was not the usual, tolerable silence Haruka had grown accustomed to. Tense as Makoto looked, his jaws might as well have been glued together, and without him, Haru found himself at a standstill, unable to do anything except shoot inquisitive glances, which the other either failed to notice or downright ignored. Haruka’s only comfort was that Makoto’s duffel bag looked packed to the brim, probably holding every item Rei conveniently listed to him yesterday afternoon, but just in case Makoto ‘accidentally’ left out the swimsuits, Haruka went ahead and packed an extra swimsuit for him out of the sheer disinterested goodness of his heart.

In the end, he didn’t have to use it, though: Makoto was simply too true to his word to pull any stunts. After sixth period, he got up and obediently followed Haruka to the pool area, where he was finally designated his own cubby holes. Makoto set down his bag on the counter, undressed with red ears, and when the moment of truth came, he pulled out Rei’s legskin without any hesitation, as it was the only swimsuit that had come even close to fitting him properly. Nagisa and Haruka stole miffed glances at him behind his back, if only because Rei’s smug smirk was rubbing his victory in their faces all over again, but they managed to keep any comments to themselves. It wasn’t as though Makoto was not allowed to have a preference. He could do whatever he wanted! But as a mere recruit with no official titles, functions, or previous accomplishments, he ought to have been mindful of everyone who had done so much for him, and given _their_ contributions preference – just one of the million implicit obligations that were steadily piling upon his shoulders, without Makoto being the least bit aware of them.

* * *

Just like Makoto, Kou had also kept her promise and was waiting for them by the pool side.

“Okay!” she said with her hands on her hips, holding out a sheet of paper for the boys to see as they came gathering around her, all except Haruka. “It’s warming up outside, so we will finally begin training in the pool today—” she continued, only to be interrupted by Haru zooming past her, diving into the water with a loud splash. Kou let out a cry of anguish, even dropping her paper as her hands whipped up and slammed down on the starting block.

“ _Hold on!_ Could you listen to what I have to say first, Haruka-senpai?! Please, Haruka-senpai?! Come _on…!_ ” she cried after the swimaway, who soon wiggled well beyond her reach with a rapid series of butterfly kicks. Rei shook his head in disapproval, then reached for the paper Kou had dropped, before the wind might snatch it away.

He quirked his brow in surprise. He hardly knew what he expected, but what he found was a long list of abbreviations and numbers neatly divided into tables. He could decipher them with ease, but Makoto stared at them for a long moment over his shoulder before he dared to ask what he was looking at.

“Oh, this?” said Rei with what felt like a condescending chuckle as he fixed his glasses. “This, Makoto-san, is a detailed training regimen.”

Makoto looked at him rather lost, his eyes flitting back to what looked more like math problems or physics formulae than a workout plan for swimmers.

“Allow me to explain, Makoto-san,” said Rei, holding out the sheet for Makoto’s viewing displeasure. “‘W-up’ means warming up, which is – well, being a fellow athlete, you probably know what warming up means. ‘Kb’ means kicking practice with a kickboard. ‘Pull’ refers to using a pull buoy to train your arms.”

Makoto followed him well enough, but the regimen grew more and more complex as they reached the next stage, until he found himself pointing to another abbreviation, ‘Med. R.’ in growing confusion.

“What is this?” he asked, almost expecting a medical term. Rei adjusted his glasses.

“I was just getting to that, Makoto-san, but I’m glad to see you are eager to learn,” he said in that same sagely tone, not noticing how Makoto made a face. “That’s an abbreviation for _Medley Relay_ , where four swimmers swim equal legs of backstroke, breaststroke, butterfly stroke, and freestyle, in that order.”

“Back, breast, butterfly…” repeated Makoto, expecting another long-winged explanation. He wasn’t disappointed.

“Here, ‘Ba’ refers to the backstroke. ‘Br’ refers to the breaststroke. ‘Bu’ refers to the butterfly stroke, and ‘Fr’ refers to freestyle, where you are allowed to use any stroke. Of course, _everyone_ knows that the front crawl is the fastest stroke, so that is what most swimmers use, including Haruka-senpai.”

“There are a few swimmers who go with the butterfly,” said Nagisa, who had been watching them and finally decided to join. “If Rei-chan were the freestyle swimmer, he would have no other choice,” he finished with a giggle. Rei scowled.

“I will have you know, Nagisa-kun, that my butterfly stroke is more than efficient to use in any freestyle event!”

“I was just teasing, Rei-chan,” said Nagisa, holding up his hands in surrender. “This is a solid training regimen, though,” he added, peering at the paper again. “Did you come up with this by yourself, Kou-chan?”

“Oh… I found that when I was cleaning the house the other week,” admitted Kou. “It’s my brother’s old training regimen.”

Her tone was quiet enough, but Makoto could have sworn he saw Haruka’s shoulders twitch on the other side of the pool. However, unable to say anything, he lowered his eyes, waiting in agony for them to bring up backstroke and who would be teaching it to him: Nagisa or Haruka.

For the first time, he found himself hoping it wouldn’t be Haru. His friend’s patience for him seemed to grow less and less each day now, and were Haru forced to teach him, Makoto was afraid that his, and everyone else’s tolerance for him would soon dwindle into nothing.


	18. EPISODE 4: Captive Orca! - Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “Let’s start with warm-up stretches!” said Rei, clapping his hands to get everyone’s attention in a way oddly reminiscent of Captain Mikoshiba. He called out loud enough for the entire pool area to hear, but from the way he eyed Makoto intently, it was apparent that he was primarily addressing his words to the only inexperienced rookie in their midst. Makoto sighed and finally stepped in front of Rei. Behind him, Nagisa hesitated, rather used to disregarding any routine, but sensing some uneasiness on Makoto’s behalf, he decided to join them to lighten the mood.

“Sit still with legs apart and lean the upper body forward,” instructed Rei, so they all sat down on the concrete to get into position. “Hold twenty seconds.”

Exactly twenty seconds later, Rei straightened and adjusted his glasses. “Bend one arm behind the head, and use the other to push the elbow toward the center of the body. Hold twenty seconds… Lie down and turn your head while pulling your knee in the opposite direction. Hold twenty seconds… Extend one arm straight while pulling it with the other. Hold twenty seconds…”

They must have spent at least five minutes leaning, bending, stretching, and flexing. In the meantime, Haruka swam a few laps around the pool, then climbed out to take a look at the paper Kou had dropped earlier. He perused the figures and numbers, lost in thought until some itch in the corner of his vision told him he was being watched. He lowered the paper. Just as he expected, Kou was now standing beside him, having left the others and their delicious posing not to miss the opportunity to talk.

“Are you interested in my brother’s old regimen?” she asked sweetly. Her smile seemed innocent, but Haruka tensed regardless, his features carefully guarded.

“Not really,” he said in a dull tone as he handed the regimen back to her. “You can write down a regimen and not follow it.” He then climbed onto the now free starting block and dove in, leaving Kou behind. It was just as well, though, for she couldn’t keep a straight face anymore.

 _So he_ is _interested_ , she thought to herself, unable to stop grinning.

“Place both hands on a wall and lean forward. Hold twenty seconds,” came Rei’s voice from behind her. Exactly twenty seconds later, Rei stood and straightened himself with a content smile.

“I believe our muscles have warmed up sufficiently for swimming,” he said as he put on his swim cap, then exchanged his glasses for a pair of prescription goggles. “Let the training begin!”

Nagisa cheered, then jumped into the pool, only to come up shivering.

“So cold…” he whined with his arms wrapped around his chest. Makoto cringed.

“It will seem warmer as your body adjusts to the temperature, Nagisa-kun,” came the dismissive reply. “Are you ready to enter the water, Makoto-san?”

“I uh… I don’t like cold water…” mumbled Makoto, shivering almost as badly as Nagisa.

“Now, now, Makoto-san, we have no time to waste,” said Rei as he ascended upon the starting block. “Watch and follow me,” he added, then curled himself into position to perform a flawless demonstration dive. Once he entered the water, he adjusted himself with a few kicks and rose to the surface, obviously waiting for Makoto to follow his lead. Makoto sighed. Fearing reproach but unable to brave the block, he crouched down to slip into the pool. He let out a pained hiss. Nagisa wasn’t kidding.

“Welcome to the pool, Mako-chan!” chirped Nagisa when Makoto joined them. Even Haruka abandoned his lane to swim over to them, all eyes now fixed on the newcomer.

“Okay…” said Makoto, straightening in the water that just barely reached above his navel, but made his posture tense and rigid all the same. “What do I do now?”

“You could start by making a proper dive, Makoto-san,” said Rei, folding his arms with a pout. “Slipping into the water like a thief is not beautiful.”

“He can’t dive,” said Haru some ways behind their backs, to which everyone replied with a long and awkward _Aaah,_ as if the incident had long been forgotten. Makoto’s face darkened at the thought.

“Well, in that case, we will teach you how to dive!” offered Nagisa. Makoto flinched.

“You saw what happened at joint practice… I just don’t think I can do it,” he said quietly, deflating more every second.

“Not with that attitude, Makoto-san..” muttered Rei under his breath, then added in a louder voice, “Now that you have mentioned joint practice, Makoto-san, we watched you swim breaststroke while we waited for our turns, and if you don’t mind, your technique seemed rather… _rudimentary_.”

“I hadn’t done any swimming since I learned how to swim ten years ago,” replied Makoto, his jaw clenched in embarrassment. Haruka remained motionless, but Nagisa turned to Rei and splashed some water at him with a frown.

“Stop being so mean to Mako-chan!” he groused. “Can’t you see the _real_ problem here?”

Makoto froze. Haruka quirked his brow. Even Rei fell silent, his chin still dripping with water.

“What Mako-chan needs is _self-confidence!_ ” said Nagisa with his hands thrown on his hips, his expression perfectly serious. “You need to be nice to him and build up his courage until he becomes a confident swimmer!”

As much as he was only begrudgingly growing used to being called ‘Mako-chan,’ and the white bikini bottom from Sunday still seemed like a mean practical joke, Makoto felt a sudden surge of warmth and gratitude for Nagisa. In his relief, he broke into a sheepish smile. Haruka’s eyes widened, but he quickly turned his head with hardened feature. Rei coughed, then adjusted his goggles.

“Very well,” he said as he propped his hands on his hips. “You are right, Nagisa-kun, confidence _is_ important.” He then did his best to flash Makoto a confident smile. “Makoto-san, please use today’s practice to become acquainted with the pool. Becoming familiar and comfortable with your environment may be a huge step towards perfection!”

They looked to Haruka next for approval, and once the captain nodded in silence, Makoto was allowed to spend the rest of their two-hour practice slowly wading up and down the length of the pool, using the same choppy breaststroke he had swum at Samezuka Academy. He only stopped a few times to clutch the side bar and catch his breath, but when they asked him if he was alright, he merely said he was fine and carried on, with no companions this time to swim beside him. Haruka shot but one glance at him and a spark of anger ignited within, unable to believe Makoto refused to move on like everyone else, that he was showing signs of the same perverse resistance that forced Haruka to exert all his powers of persuasion to make him join the swim club. _Why can’t he just embrace the water_ , thought Haru as though he had never run away from the water himself. He then turned to drift into the lane furthest away from Makoto, ashamed of himself, yet unable to quell the roar of that angry flame inside his heart.

* * *

In the meantime, everyone else did their best to spend their first practice usefully. To encourage Makoto, Rei began every other lap of butterfly stroke with a perfect dive, always making sure Makoto was facing him as he jumped to show off his technique. Nagisa, who also had something similar in mind, was freshening up on his breaststroke one lane away from Makoto, swimming in the opposite direction so he could wave to him whenever the other stopped to flash him a thumbs up. Makoto half-heartedly returned the gesture, still unsure if Nagisa was trying to encourage him, or was mocking him for flinching and stopping mid-swim. As for Kou, she remained by the pool side to watch and study the others, especially Makoto, whose every move seemed forceful and aggressive as though he were fighting quicksand. To get a good view of him, Kou had settled right by the lane Haruka had chosen for himself. When his next lap brought him by Kou’s side, Haruka stopped for a short break and removed his goggles and cap. Kou took a deep breath.

“Haruka-senpai…” she began, leaning a little closer once Haru looked up from the water. “Why do you swim?”

Haruka’s eyes lowered to the water again, as though the smooth, shimmering surface might hold the answer in invisible ink. The ripples flattened without as much as a hint. He suppressed a sigh.

“I don’t have a reason,” he said quietly, unsure if he believed it anymore.

“My brother’s dream is to become an Olympic swimmer,” risked Kou, their eyes meeting in the reflective surface for a moment. “That’s why he went all the way to Australia to—”

“That’s got nothing to do with me,” replied Haruka, his tone sharper than he intended. He closed his eyes. “Besides, it’s just a dream,” he added in a softer voice, that conversation from four years ago still cutting too deep, and the idea of the Olympic stage still ringing in his ears like a false cliché.

“Perhaps,” allowed Kou with a tentative smile, her eyes falling upon a small group of ants scuttling along the edge of the pool. “But I think he’ll be a little closer to his dream if he’s with you guys.. Like when you swam the relay together.”

Haruka stared up at her and Kou flashed him a hopeful smile, oblivious that she was asking for the impossible, a heartfelt reunion when Rin had made it clear he wanted nothing to do with any of them anymore, too busy on his quest for some hypothetical gold medal in a distant utopian future. Haru huffed and the next moment, he put his cap back on to swim another lap, just to get away from Kou. He kept his distance from Makoto as well, though his eyes now wandered to him more often, to find him still struggling, and unhappy as ever. Haruka turned his head, his earlier frustration simmering into guilt. Makoto had done nothing wrong, and joined despite everything… so why did Haru want to avoid him?

* * *

That same afternoon at Samezuka Academy, Rin was practicing harder than all of his ex-teammates combined, swimming turn after turn with Nitori patiently timing him after each lap.

“Finish! Good job!” he said when Rin’s hand hit the wall. “That last spurt was incredible, Matsuoka-senpai!”

As though he hadn’t even heard him, Rin pushed his goggles back into place.

“One more run,” he muttered under his breath and launched forward. Nitori twitched.

“Huh? Y-Yes!” he cried after him, pressing _Start_ on his stopwatch. They managed to carry on like this for an hour longer, until they reached a time that finally satisfied Rin.

After practice, the two of them returned to their dorm room so Rin could take a short rest before his evening run. He sat down on his bed, drying his wet hair with a towel he kept rubbing over his scalp to speed up the process. Nitori checked tomorrow’s course books, then turned to his roommate with a smile.

“You were amazing today, Matsuoka-senpai,” he began in the hope of pleasant conversation, for his hopes never diminished no matter how unwilling Rin had proven to be. Surely if Aiichiro just tried a little harder, his senpai would eventually feel more comfortable around him? Nevertheless, tonight he was out of luck. At that moment, all Rin felt was annoyance and the dull pang of fatigue.

“You should stop talking about how amazing I am and focus on finding your own style,” was all he had to say to his kouhai’s words of encouragement. Nitori lowered his head.

“I’m a lost cause. I haven’t made any progress,” he said quietly, his tone almost apologetic for having failed to please anyone, least of all his senpai. “I guess it comes down to talent,” he continued, finally cracking a smile. “I was really impressed by Nanase-san at our joint practice—”

“ _Nitori._ ”

Rin stopped drying his hair and turned to the other, slowly pulling the towel off his head. Talent? _Talent?_ “ _Is that_ _really what you think..?”_

His eyes looked savage, two pools of bright red blood that drowned whatever Nitori was going to say, his words sinking to the pit of his stomach with a yelp. Admirable as his senpai was, he could be terrifying sometimes. No matter how many weeks Aiichiro had spent trying to figure him out, he was still treading cluelessly among the cracks, which threatened to erupt with icy words and hellish tempers at the slightest provocation.

“They just started up their swim club and haven’t had a real practice yet,” said Rin, rising from his bed with his fists clenched. “You can tell by looking at their bodies. They haven’t been working out.”

He then ripped the towel off his head and threw it carelessly behind for Nitori to catch, closing the door on his roommate without another word. Aiichiro stood there for a long time after Rin left, wringing the towel in his hands before he managed to will himself into moving. He draped the towel onto the heater to dry, and having no more actual work to keep him busy, Aiichiro soon climbed the ladder to his upper bunk, where he lay down on his stomach so he could comfortably quiz his memories about joint practice, but as soon as he recalled each member of the Iwatobi Swim Club, he was forced to conclude that each of them seemed fit to him, though some were undoubtedly more chiseled than others. The unknown student he had to issue a spare swimsuit to was particularly sturdy and well-built, almost too heavy for a regular swimmer, and the more Aiichiro thought about him, the more uncomfortable he felt. He was not very pleased with the guy at first, but now scolded himself in retrospect for thinking ill of someone who had to swim with a sore, barely healing back in front of everyone. Aiichiro would have certainly felt wretched had Captain Mikoshiba forced him to do the same… and to add to his shame, he still didn’t know the fourth person’s name, even though he could list the names of the other members with ease. He frowned and dug out his diary from beneath the pillow, scribbling furiously with a pen.

_ June 3. _ _Practiced a lot with Senpai today. He seems to be getting faster every time! He is simply AMAZING!! If a little difficult at times…. He reminded me that I need to ask about the fourth member of the Iwatobi Swim Club. Maybe the captain will know his name. Senpai doesn’t seem to know, but I guess that’s not surprising. He doesn’t seem to be a swimmer from what I saw, and his body looks too dense and muscular. Maybe he’s into martial arts and those bruises were from practice. Whatever he had been doing before joining the club must have been brutal. I wonder if he is really cut out to be a swimmer, and if there will be another joint practice. Their manager hasn’t come around in weeks. I think the captain likes her… He had better NOT tell Senpai though, for his own sake!!_

* * *

Once evening fell, the lights scattered around Samezuka Academy’s campus spilled their meager glow on the ground, just enough to illuminate the brick pathways Rin had chosen for his final run for the day. His wet hair clung to his head in heavy clumps, but he no longer cared, all his thoughts stubbornly whirling around Nanase Haruka.

 _Given the condition he’s in, my victory means nothing. It doesn’t count as a win,_ he told himself, spurring his body to run faster, to endure longer. Haru already looked rather unimpressive to him when they had first met at the derelict Iwatobi Swimming Club, but come joint practice, he seemed even thinner, as though he had lost weight sometime in between. Had he been sick? If so, _it must have been a long, severe illness…_

Rin shook his head violently, eyes narrowing as he broke into a sprint. There was no sure way to know what happened. All that mattered was that sitting side by side, Haruka looked pathetic compared to the nameless guy they had brought with them for practice, whom Rin simply called ‘Speedo Bruises’ in his head. Unlike Nitori, Rin was perfectly content not knowing the guy’s name. Who could possibly compare to _him_ , he who had mastered every single stroke like a human Swiss army knife, the Avatar of swimming? Those guys would never recover from losing their one and only alpha. That thought was Rin’s comfort in his darkest hours, brought him the sweetest of dreams or the heaviest of empty sleep. If that guy turned out to be just as poor a swimmer as he appeared at joint practice, Haru and the others would be pining for Rin like nomads stranded in a desert, parched and aching for just one sip of water. _Let them ache,_ he thought to himself as he gritted his teeth. He was reaching for the gold. What were _they_ doing with their lives other than wasting it…?

* * *

A new day soon laid Monday to rest, and come Tuesday, Haru walked down to Makoto’s house again to take him away from the kitten he was holding like a small, purring safety blanket. Haruka hoped today would be different, that Makoto would somehow revert to his usual cheerfulness like he had done on the first week of school, but their silence was still poisoned by an undercurrent of tension, causing Makoto to constantly fix his eyes where they invited no conversation. To plead with him would have been too much effort, so Haru resigned himself to a wordless walk, but it was with no small amount of irritation. Why did Makoto even join him if he was not going to talk? It wasn’t as though Haru couldn’t have just walked to school on his own. Makoto could have stayed and held that cat as though _that_ would solve all the problems he was unwilling to face and resolve himself. Or was Makoto’s anxiety so severe he might not be able to move on at all..?

 _Heaven forbid_ …

Haru bit his lip and bit it hard. He desperately wanted to believe the reverse, that Makoto was being difficult and obnoxious on purpose, or else Haru would have had to face the reality of having hurt and scarred his friend for life… _Just like.._ **_No._** Makoto told him Rin had been unfair. In that moment, Haru could even believe it, and he had been clinging to that thought ever since. If believing it could prove beneficial to Haru’s well-being, and strengthen his will to start over, then surely there was a chance of Makoto being at fault now, of Makoto being selfish and not thinking of him. It was a hard thing to assume and believe in (in a way, it was almost as unfair as Rin had been to him), but Haru had since gotten a real taste of the water. Now that it was summer at last, the water would await him every day like a faithful lover, no matter what, and having immersed himself in that soothing idea, Haruka found that leaving his thoughts of Makoto on the shore became a little easier every time.

Their silence continued in class. There was virtually no interaction between them until the classroom door slid open at lunch break and in stepped Nagisa, waving hello with what appeared to be a thick catalogue.

“Haru-chan! Mako-chan! Yoo hoo!” he cried as he ran inside with Rei chasing after him.

“Hey, wait up, Nagisa-kun!” he cried, reaching for the catalogue, but failing to snatch it from Nagisa’s greedy grasp.

“Look at this!” he said, laying a sports catalogue on Haruka’s desk and hitting it up right at the standard all-purpose uniforms. “Ta-da!”

“Uniforms?” asked Makoto as he leaned over to check it out. He quirked a brow at the designs. Haruka stared at them in mild disinterest.

“Yep!” said Nagisa, who was elbowed lightly in the side by Rei as he stepped closer to say,

“Since we are now a fully functional sports club, we should consider matching uniforms to build unity and morale.” He then shot Nagisa a peeved look for almost beating him to the punch, but Nagisa merely grinned in reply and turned back to Makoto and Haruka.

“What do you say? Wouldn’t it be great? It would give our club a more official feel,” he added to Rei’s explanation, then nodded encouragingly at the others. Haruka shrugged his shoulders, and when it became clear he would say nothing for or against, Makoto risked a glance at him to judge his disposition.

“It.. sounds like a good idea,” he said at last, figuring from Haru’s calm expression that his friend approved in his own silent way. Since the other gave no sign of feeling the opposite, Rei and Nagisa beamed as if the captain himself had spoken in favor of their pet project.

“I know, right?” said Nagisa. “I think we should go with this design, and this color. And we can even use an image in addition to the school emblem,” he explained, pointing at several sample images on the page. Rei twitched.

“Wait, Nagisa-kun, you never said anything about putting an image on the uniforms!” he said in a panicked tone. Nagisa quirked a brow at him.

“I thought we would just put Iwatobi-chan, didn’t you, Rei-chan?” he replied. Rei slapped a heavy hand over his face.

“But it’s not beautiful..!” he whined, and as the unlucky winner of a year’s supply of swimsuit-version Iwatobi-chan, Makoto secretly agreed with him. (On the other hand, Ran and Ren were delighted with Makoto’s new toys, and quickly set up their largest doll house for the entire Iwatobi clan, soon weaving a story around them that would have made Makoto’s head spin with all its drama and intrigue.)

“Let’s put a real rockhopper penguin on it, then!” said Nagisa with a grin. “That would be pretty cool! What do you think, Haru-chan?”

Instead of a simple yes or no, Haruka propped his notepad against the desk and set to work on what they could only guess was a sketch. After some hasty scribbling, he turned the notepad around to show his work: an angular, three-dimensional rendering of Iwatobi-chan’s head. Makoto eyed it with mixed feelings, but the neat, sharp angles and perfect symmetry of the piece tinted Rei’s cheeks a soft pink.

“ _..Beautiful,_ ” he whispered despite himself and Makoto stared at him, no longer sure just what the word ‘beautiful’ meant in Ryuugazaki Rei’s vocabulary.

* * *

Once school was over, they all headed to the pool so Nagisa could show their prospective uniform plans to Kou, and ask their manager about funds. She was already waiting for them, so Nagisa held out the catalogue to her, but before he could even begin to explain his object in more detail, Kou reached out and all but tore the catalogue from his hands. Nagisa let out a whine and reached for it, but Kou proved merciless, stomping her foot as she threw the catalogue on the ground.

“Forget about buying matching uniforms for now,” she told them, then whipped out a sheet of paper that she held up to them, her other hand on her hip. “Here!”

“Is that a new training regimen, Kou-san?” asked Rei as he fixed his glasses to take a closer look.

“Yes, it is!” replied Kou, her tone strict. “I revamped the regimen to account for the fact that Makoto-senpai has to catch up and probably cannot swim backstroke at all. Makoto-senpai!” she turned to him next, fishing out a small, pink calendar from her bag.

“Wh-What is it?” asked Makoto, his collar suddenly too tight to breathe.

“Given how much time we have until the regional tournament, you have to learn how to swim backstroke within a week,” said Kou, checking the dates in her calendar. Makoto’s jaw dropped, but no sound came out, leaving him to stand there gaping like a fish.

“Within a week?” replied Rei in his place, dismissing Kou with a laugh and a nonchalant wave. “That’s conceptually impossible!”

“ _This is no laughing matter!_ ” snapped Kou as she swooped in to glare at the vice-captain, glowering a mere inch from his face.

“Y-Yes, ma’am…!” came the nervous reply. Having whipped Rei into submission, Kou turned to Makoto next, shoving the new regimen in his face.

“If you fail to learn backstroke in one week, you won’t be able to complete this training regimen!” was her verdict, pointing to a special section drawn up just for Makoto, where all sets from the original had been reduced by half, yet still seemed entirely too much. “Your week officially begins tomorrow, so you had better be prepared!”

Makoto’s lips were quivering pitifully, but nobody felt his pain or was inclined to feel sorry for him. A challenge presented itself, and to everyone else but Makoto, it didn’t seem as impossible as Rei had first claimed it to be.

“Very well, one week it is,” said the vice-captain as he adjusted his glasses again. “We first have to make sure Makoto-san learns how to swim properly, and then he can start on his backstroke. I’m going to check my shelves for useful books tonight. I’m sure I can find some theoretical introductions on the subject!”

“Awesome, Rei-chan!” cheered Nagisa. “Mako-chan seems to know breaststroke, so I can teach him how to do it better!”

“I will make a calendar for him and keep track of his progress,” offered Kou, and rather than paying any heed to the subject himself, all eyes fixed on Haruka next as the last possible contributor. Haru shrugged his shoulders and turned his head, annoyed by the attention.

“I only swim free,” he said in the end, hoping he might not be needed.

“Haru-chan will teach him the front crawl then,” said Nagisa. “Rei-chan can teach him butterfly and any of us can teach him how to dive, so we’ve got everything covered!”

“No, you don’t…” said Makoto, finally drawing their attention, even though he regretted having to ask, “Who’s going to teach me backstroke? At least one of you knows how to swim backstroke, right?”

That was the moment when all eyes fell to the ground in awkward silence.

“Actually… none of us swim backstroke at all,” admitted Nagisa with an apologetic look. “Rei-chan can’t swim anything except butterfly or he’ll sink like an anvil, I haven’t done anything except breaststroke and front crawl for years, and you’ve heard Haru-chan. The only one who knew how to swim backstroke properly was Rin-chan… he was an expert at every stroke,” he finished, hanging his head.

Makoto frowned, his expression bitter. Next to him, Rei fumed with burning cheeks, irritated by Nagisa’s degrading comparison of him to an anvil, but more upset at the fact that the senior recruit he had been trying to impress seemed downright unwilling to cooperate and adjust.

“ _So what_ if none of us swim backstroke?” he said with an impatient glare, careful not to look the two offenders in the eye. “Surely once Makoto-san learns the theories and the basics, he would be able to do it on his own! There is no reason to suppose it would pose any problem for someone who can stay afloat even with a flawed technique!”

“Can you _please_ stop talking about how bad you think my swimming is?” snapped Makoto in reply, his tone strained and his face tense as ever. Nagisa now stepped between them and lifted his hands, as though he had been doing nothing but breaking up fights all his life.

“Now, now, Rei-chan, Mako-chan.. there’s no need to get angry at each other,” he said gently, though his smile was nervous. “We’ll figure something out, okay?”

“ _I’m sure we will,_ ” replied Rei as he folded his arms over his chest. Makoto withstood his glare, but his throat had since grown too tight to manage a response.

“Remember, inspire self-confidence!” said Nagisa, trying to sound light and cheerful. Makoto almost caught himself saying that none of them inspired any confidence, let alone self-confidence, but quickly bit his tongue. “Now let’s change and start practice!”

“Perhaps Makoto-san should wear Nagisa-kun’s swim brief today, since he prefers to swim breaststroke so much,” said Rei in a sullen tone. Makoto’s face twitched in horror, but before he could defend himself, Nagisa latched onto his arm in an affectionate hug.

“That’s a great idea! Maybe it will bring you luck, Mako-chan!”

Nagisa being his only active supporter at present, all of Makoto’s counterarguments died an instant painful death. He changed into the controller-brief without another word, hoping nobody was watching him as he adjusted it for several minutes, hoping it would hold.

When he was finished, Haru was no longer there. He seemed to be in the habit of wearing his own swimsuit as underwear, and so was able to head out almost immediately to get into the water without waiting for any of them. Perhaps if Makoto had been in a better mood, he would have found it funny or endearing in that special Haru way, but he could no longer regard it as anything but his friend’s desire to have as little to do with him as possible. It was a mean thought. Worse, it meshed all too well with Makoto’s premonitions that his own shortcomings would slowly strangle their friendship. He shook his head hard to try and strike it from his mind, but ever since Haruka had turned away from him on Monday, the idea had been eating Makoto alive.

* * *

Makoto’s seven days would have started on Wednesday, but the moment Rei was done conducting their warm-up stretches, it became very clear that instruction and preparation would start then and there from the basics. Rei fixed his cap and goggles, then told them to follow him. He and Nagisa soon dove into the pool, followed reluctantly by Makoto, who slipped in after them from the edge, earning a small frown from Rei.

“It is best to get a head start in your training, Makoto-san, so let’s begin with the turtle float and test your buoyancy,” he said as he pushed lightly at his goggles, which prompted Nagisa to put on his.

“I’ll show you how it’s done,” he said to Makoto. Nagisa pulled his arms in and scooted into a ball, soon bobbing gently on the surface like a human buoy.

“You hug your knees to your chest and relax,” explained Rei, pointing to Nagisa’s folded arms and legs under the water. “It’s not beautiful, but it is a standard test of being able to float.”

“Can _you_ do it, then?” asked Makoto, biting his tongue a moment too late. Rei shot him a glare.

“Allow me to demonstrate,” he said in a sharp tone, quickly following Nagisa’s lead. After all these years, he could still stay afloat, a fact that baffled Coach Sasabe to no end back when Rei was only nine years old, and drifted to the bottom with every stroke except butterfly. Makoto’s heart was beating fiercely. What if he couldn’t even do that…?

Rei and Nagisa rose from the water a few moments later, and now stood watching him, Nagisa’s hands behind his back and Rei’s arms folded firmly over his chest.

“Your turn, Makoto-san,” he said with his head held high. Makoto put on his goggles with a sigh, taking a breath deep enough to hurt. He lowered himself and curled his limbs close together, his eyes firmly shut. He could feel the sun in traces on his back, but his body felt so heavy he might as well had been made of lead.

“He can float just fine,” said Nagisa as he watched Makoto, his eyes on the small patch of the other’s back that was still visible on the surface.

“Just barely, you mean,” said Rei in a low voice, and by the time he finished his sentence, Makoto started sinking. He still hadn’t opened his eyes and clung to his diminishing air for dear life, but when his knees touched the bottom, his mouth shot open in a muted scream and he scrambled to the surface gasping for breath.

“You sank, Mako-chan…” said Nagisa, scratching his head. Makoto stared down wordlessly, drawing sharp breaths through his nose as he watched the water lick at his navel. Why did he sink? What was pulling him down…?

He didn’t dare look up for fear of seeing scorn, but Rei’s features softened considerably.

“Let’s try something else,” he said, his tone a little gentler than before. “To swim backstroke, you will have to stay afloat on your back. Please lower yourself and lie onto the surface, Makoto-san. Don’t forget to breathe evenly.”

Makoto tensed, but followed Rei instructions and draped himself across the water, lying as rigidly as though he had been put on a rack. As long as he held his breath, he could stay afloat, but the moment he exhaled, his body threatened to submerge again. He contorted instinctively, arching his back and bucking his hips each time he tried to stretch out again, until he turned over and scrambled to his feet, his hands clenching below the surface.

“What’s wrong, Mako-chan?” asked Nagisa. Makoto couldn’t say.

“Perhaps it’s just new,” risked Rei in that same, softer tone. “I’m sure you will get the hang of it by the end of the week, Makoto-san.”

“Just like backstroke, right…?” sighed Makoto.

“Just like backstroke,” came the confident reply.

“I don’t even know what backstroke really is,” admitted Makoto at last, not looking at either of them.

“Backstroke is swimming on your back,” shrugged Nagisa. “So it’s… swimming upside-down, I guess.”

“But just now, when I lay on my back, I couldn’t see the water or anything,” said Makoto, his brow creasing in fear. “How am I supposed to swim if I can’t see where I’m going?”

“You swim blindly, of course!” said Nagisa, sounding awfully cheerful. “That’s the thrill of it, just rushing ahead not knowing where the water takes you or what lurks underneath..!”

Perhaps he would have carried on, had it not been for Makoto’s face slowly changing, his eyes wide and glassy as his lips split over a row of gritted teeth.

“I’m certain there are techniques that can help you, otherwise backstroke would have been deemed unsafe,” said Rei, increasingly uncomfortable and hardly knowing why. “I will definitely look up the theories tonight.”

“What do we do now, then?” asked Nagisa, glancing from Rei to Makoto and back.

“We could teach you how to dive, Makoto-san,” offered Rei, but Makoto shook his head instinctively.

“ _No,_ ” he blurted, but feeling a twinge of guilt the very moment he had said it, he quickly added, “I might need the basics first to be more confident..”

“Diving _is_ part of the basics, Makoto-san,” noted Rei, his impatience returning. “But very well. Nagisa-kun,” he continued, turning to his friend. “Could you go first and teach him proper breaststroke tomorrow? I have to brush up on my material first.”

“Of course,” said Nagisa, flashing Makoto a grin and a wink. “Pack your speedo tomorrow, Mako-chan, we’re going all out!”

“ _All out_ is about right…” muttered Makoto, glad nobody caught his meaning.


	19. EPISODE 4: Captive Orca! - Part 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kou’s thoughtfulness reached well beyond digging up and modifying his brother’s training regimen for the team. Having realized that Makoto was not as capable in the water as everyone else, she took it upon herself to persuade Amakata-sensei to attend practice for the next seven days, not just as their supervisor, but as the only adult who could drive a car in case of an emergency. Kou never stated her reasons out loud, hoping nothing of that sort would ever befall Makoto, but while the possibility lingered, it was best for the entire club that their advisor linger, too. Not was there any reason to explain her sudden reappearance. The original team thought it quite natural that Ama-chan-sensei would once again be there to lounge in her folding chair as the uncrowned queen of the Iwatobi Swim Club, and she was certainly the least of Makoto’s concerns. Moreover, Kou had also kept her promise and made a calendar for Makoto, which she brought with her for next day’s practice, fixing it onto the railing that ran all the way by the edge of the lowered passage way to the changing area, in clear view of the pool. For now it simply read, in large black letters,

_7 Days to Go!_

Once Makoto squished himself into his borrowed swim brief with debatable success, Nagisa pulled him over to the water so they could straighten out Makoto’s breaststroke. They had the entire pool to themselves this time, so Kou and Rei could observe from the side. Even Haruka agreed to join them, though he did so less willingly and with conflicted feelings.

“Let’s start with your legs, Mako-chan. Lie down on your stomach and show me what you know!” instructed Nagisa as he reached out his hands, which Makoto was apparently supposed to hold onto so he could concentrate solely on his legwork. With some hesitation, Makoto took Nagisa’s small hands in his own, neither of them noticing how Rei’s cheeks colored and Haru’s lips twitched. Makoto then lowered himself onto the surface, kicking his legs in a way he hoped was reminiscent of frog style, but the more he tried to stay afloat, the more rigid he became, until his torso tensed up completely and his grip became unbearably tight. His kicks also gathered considerable strength, and within a minute, he was pushing Nagisa backwards against the other’s will.

“Mako-chan, you’re hurting me..” mumbled Nagisa at last with a small, awkward laugh that sounded almost scared. That was when Makoto froze and that absent look of concentration disappeared from his face. He released Nagisa’s hands at once, then scrambled to his feet, clasping his own hands together.

“Did I hold you too hard?” he asked, his eyes brimming with guilt and concern. “I’m… I’m sorry…”

Nagisa smiled at him soothingly, but kept rubbing his hands to restore circulation. Makoto’s brows knitted.

“Are you alright..?”

“It’s okay, Mako-chan. You’ve got an iron grip!” said Nagisa, trying for a real, comfortable laugh this time. Makoto hung his head.

On the pool side, Rei’s face hardened in alarm. Beside him, Haruka’s eyes were now fixed on his own hands, clenching and unclenching them seemingly without reason. As for Kou, she was scribbling into a notepad, where she gathered all her information on the four swimmers.

Fortunately for all of them, Nagisa recovered quickly enough, and was not about to abandon Makoto.

“How about you lie down now and I hold you in place so you can practice with your arms, Mako-chan?” he offered. Makoto nodded with a heavy heart, soon draping himself across the surface as Nagisa’s hands settled on his hips. Only Kou was watching now as Makoto began his stroke, the others turning their heads a little too sharply.

Makoto was more careful at first, his arms drawn almost shyly as if he were afraid of bumping into Nagisa, but as he settled into rhythm and his torso threatened to submerge without movement, that same violent energy soon returned, until Nagisa found himself stumbling after him. He clung to Makoto’s hips firmly, but it was no use. As Makoto burrowed through the water and his focus narrowed, his legs began twitching instinctively, eventually releasing a kick that made Nagisa drop him and scuttle away. Makoto jolted forward, then stopped abruptly to plant his feet. He turned back to find Nagisa standing in the next lane, with his hands thrown up and looking quite confused.

“He can’t control himself at all,” concluded Rei in a strained tone as he pushed his goggles back. He clenched his jaw. Normally, he would have given Makoto a second chance, but the mere thought that Nagisa might be in pain from having been violently gripped by Makoto made him reconsider at once. He turned to Haruka next, and in a tone that admitted no argument, he proceeded to say,

“Nagisa-kun has done all he could, Haruka-senpai. It’s your turn to teach Makoto-san the front crawl tomorrow.”

Haruka tensed his shoulders and turned his head archly. His every urge protested exerting himself uselessly when Makoto wasn’t even supposed to learn anything but backstroke, nor did he long to spend time with him when Makoto was all tension and no talk. Even now, he was standing in the pool hunched over and his hands gathered in front of him, and just looking at him made Haru uncomfortable in ways he couldn’t even place. How Makoto’s hands had cupped Nagisa’s undoubtedly made an impression on his mind, but having seen what happened afterwards, he no longer understood his own feelings about it, and that made him more obstinate still.

“Can’t you teach him butterfly next?” he replied at last, not looking Rei in the eye, and while his words were quiet, he was too close to the others not to be heard. Makoto’s heart jolted. Nagisa glanced to him sheepishly, having expected Haru-chan to be more excited to spend time in the water with his friend, and now facing sore disappointment.

“ _No,_ Haruka-senpai, he needs to learn a basic stroke first, butterfly is too advanced for someone who can’t even do a proper breaststroke!” retorted Rei, his voice just barely held back. “Besides, as captain _and_ his classmate, _you_ should assume responsibility! Nagisa-kun has done enough!”

“ _Fine,_ ” said Haruka, wanting nothing more than to end the conversation that seemed to be discomforting for everyone involved, even Kou, who had since closed her notebook and left their side to exchange some words with Amakata-sensei.

“It’s alright, Mako-chan,” said Nagisa, patting the other gingerly on the arm, if only because he had to spare his hands as much as he could. “You weren’t that bad.. Why don’t you take out the kickboard and the buoy to practice? I’m sure you’ll get better in no time!”

Makoto’s face spoke volumes of how he didn’t believe a single kind word Nagisa had said. Nonetheless, he nodded in shame and began wading towards the end of the pool so he could fetch both items as suggested. He returned some minutes later, and for the rest of practice, he remained in the furthermost lane, with nothing but the kickboard and the buoy to keep him company.

* * *

_6 Days to Go!_

The next morning, Haruka’s feet reluctantly brought him in front of Makoto’s house, but unlike last time, he didn’t stop to pause and wait for him to put down the kitten. The moment he saw them together, he slowly walked past, leaving Makoto to set down his favorite in haste to hurry after him. Haruka almost wished he didn’t. Makoto said nothing once again, though it appeared he was simply gathering courage that ultimately never came.

After school, everyone gathered in the changing room, where Makoto inquired about Nagisa’s hands. Nagisa smiled at him and said they were _Right as rain, Mako-chan!_ , but he could do nothing to lessen Makoto’s guilt when the look on Rei’s face made it clear his friend was lying. No more words were exchanged afterwards as Makoto opened his duffel bag and eventually fished out Haru’s jammers from the bottom, figuring he ought to wear them for Haru like he had worn the swim brief for Nagisa. Just days ago, Haruka would have preferred it too, but when he risked a look and saw how the stripes stretched over Makoto’s larger thighs, his face heated up something fierce. He was forced to turn away, and could only hope the water would conceal as much of Makoto as possible.

They soon headed outside and Haruka dove into the pool, looking up at Makoto to follow him. His friend still couldn’t bring himself to dive, but he made a small vertical jump, trying and failing to appease Rei. The vice-captain himself was once again sitting on the sidelines with Kou and Nagisa, often glancing at the latter’s hands and then shooting a glare at the culprit. Thankfully, Makoto didn’t notice at all.

Haruka turned out to be a very different instructor from Nagisa. Having realized that there’s no need to hold Makoto’s hands to practice the simpler moves of the front crawl, and the swinging movement of his arms would make holding the other’s hips too difficult to be worth the trouble, Haru simply settled for showing him his own technique, complete with a few instructions and an abundance of abstracts. _Believe in yourself. Do what you want. Go by your senses_. In truth, useless advice to someone like Makoto, especially when it was constantly followed by Rei’s agitated commentary of, _I don’t understand how this is relevant_ , or _That is not how you teach a technique, Haruka-senpai!_ Not once did Haruka reach out to adjust the angle of Makoto’s arms, or encourage the arch of his back, so Makoto did his best to mimic him, hoping that would be enough to please everyone.

It wasn’t, of course. After Haruka’s lesson, Makoto was explicitly told to demonstrate his freshly acquired skills, and though he fared slightly better than he did yesterday, he swung his arms with the same furious energy that had surfaced in his frog style. His front crawl soon unhinged and he dipped too deep, swallowing a large gulp of water. He reeled back in an instant and started coughing, so violently he went hoarse trying to expel the water from his lungs. On the far end, everyone stared at him with a frown.

“It’s just not beautiful,” muttered Rei. Nagisa hung his head, and Haruka turned away, feeling nothing but acute disappointment that Makoto wasn’t swimming with his heart.

* * *

_5 Days to Go!_

The weather forecast proved correct. Friday’s practice washed away in a heavy downpour, leaving them no choice but to gather at Haruka’s house, to hold an emergency strategy meeting at Kou’s suggestion. Makoto himself was not looking forward to it in the slightest, but he started getting the feeling that his opinion mattered little. Not only was a deadline hanging over his head like the sword of Damocles, but he began to fear that everybody was getting the wrong idea about his shortcomings.

“Let us begin,” said Rei once everyone sat down to the living room table with their drinks. Makoto was perched at one end of the table by himself, able to do nothing except squirm in his seat under the weight of their prying glances. “Our first topic of discussion is _Reasons why Makoto-san cannot swim properly_. Any suggestions?”

“The water doesn’t like him,” said Haruka matter-of-factly, his tone drenched in yesterday’s disappointment.

“Poor Mako-chan…” mumbled Nagisa, both of them earning a glare from Makoto.

“Haruka-senpai, _please,_ ” said Rei, pressing his glasses back roughly. “Superstition has no place at a strategy meeting.”

“He seemed really aggressive in the water…” mused Kou, now putting the contents of her notepad to use. “Maybe he has behavioral issues!”

“Mako-chan is really nice, though,” replied Nagisa, who held no grudges of his own and so could view Makoto’s character in a more rational light than his friends. “I don’t think he’d hurt a fly.”

“Except when he crushed your hands, that is,” replied Rei, shooting Makoto an accusing glare that drained all the blood from his face.

“That was just an accident, though, Mako-chan isn’t like that,” continued Nagisa, but he no longer looked either in the eye. “Right, Haru-chan? You spend the most time with him, what’s he _usually_ like?”

“Wishy-washy,” replied Haruka in a heartbeat, his brow furrowed.

“Eh?!” cried Makoto.

“You can’t make up your mind about anything. It’s no good and always brings the worst results,” said Haruka, his face unreadable. Makoto’s brow twitched.

“See? I told you Mako-chan was nice,” said Nagisa with a shrug.

“Could it be a comprehension problem then?” suggested Kou. It was Haru’s turn to shrug.

“He does well on tests.”

“So you _are_ smart,” said Rei in what sounded like genuine relief, his odd choice of words painting Makoto’s cheeks a sickly shade of red.

“He needs to eat mackerel,” said Haruka, eyeing Makoto as though he were scanning for signs of malnutrition.

“That’s full of omega three fatty acids, right?” asked Kou. Haru nodded.

“Perhaps his musculature is too dense,” suggested Rei, to add something plausible to the conversation.

“Yeah! He’s too strong and can’t control his powers, like the Incredible Hulk!” laughed Nagisa, not noticing in time that they had all been trying Makoto’s patience for far too long.

“That’s enough!” snapped Makoto, his eyes flashing at them. “I didn’t mean to hurt Nagisa, it was an accident! I’m not _like_ that. _Please believe me!_ ” he pleaded, tone strained and eyes large.

“You are not helping your case, Makoto-san,” said Rei, fixing his glasses sternly at the outburst, which only seemed to justify his concerns about Makoto’s behavior. “Perhaps this is beyond our expertise. We should talk to a professional…”

“Like a coach?” asked Nagisa, earning more of Makoto’s good will and gratitude.

“A coach! That’s exactly what I need!” he said, finally daring to look at everyone for approval.

“Where do we find a coach, though?” asked Kou in deep thought, briefly considering Onii-chan and Captain Mikoshiba as potential, if somewhat unlikely candidates. Makoto furrowed his brow, but the next moment, his face lit up in realization.

“I know a coach!” he cried, digging out his phone from his pocket. What did the scooter say… _Pizza Boy._ “Do you have a phonebook, Haru..?”

* * *

Makoto ended up ordering a large pepperoni pizza, asking specifically for a certain employee to deliver it to Haruka’s house, with Nagisa attached to his arm the entire time, snuggling Makoto in a surge of affection that the promise of free food inevitably excited. Makoto thought nothing of it and let him cling with a good grace. He was all too used to his siblings crawling over him like he was their human jungle gym, and at present, too nervous to do anything except let Nagisa nuzzle his bicep and praise him for being “so smart and capable.” Rei and Haruka refused to comment for strikingly similar reasons, while Kou simply shook her head, a little envious of Nagisa for being able to get so close to those nice hard muscles with such ease and artlessness.

It was the longest half an hour they had ever spent together, the silence so thick it was suffocating, and when the bell finally ended the unhappy enchantment, Coach Sasabe proved unimpressed by Makoto’s sneaky maneuver.

“Are you serious?” he asked in a weary tone as everyone took a slice of pizza or two except Makoto. “You want me to teach you just because I used to be a coach?”

“Come on, Goro-chan,” mumbled Nagisa, stopping between words to stuff his face just a little more. “If you could teach Rei-chan, this would be easy..!”

“ _Just what are you implying, Nagisa-kun?!_ ” screeched Rei, swallowing his food in haste just to interject.

“Don’t talk and eat at the same time!” snapped Sasabe too, massaging his temple as he rose from his seat. “I’m a busy man. Why don’t you guys teach him?”

Having received no ready answer, Sasabe turned to leave, soon shouting _Goodbye_ from the front door and dashing Makoto’s hopes completely.

“It didn’t work…” he whispered to himself as Nagisa took a third slice. Makoto might as well have taken some pizza now as his consolation prize, but just one look at it made his stomach clench like a trembling fist. Silence trailed on, Nagisa’s mouth too full and Haru refusing to speak, which left the vice-captain with the heavy burden of settling the matter. No matter how uncomfortable he felt under the responsibility, there was no other choice but to give it his all, and expect – no, _demand_ , that Makoto finally do the same.

“No coach, then,” he said, fixing his glasses with his clean hand, the other still holding a carefully and artistically nibbled slice of pizza. “You will continue your lessons under our tutelage, Makoto-san, and we might as well set two rules for the rest of your week: less resistance, and more cooperation!”

“But, I—”

“You have been willful and obdurate about your regimen long enough, Makoto-san,” continued Rei, his eyes hard. “From now on, you will learn everything in the order we deem best for you, and if you really _are_ serious about being a member of the Iwatobi Swim Club, you will do your best to comply, and you will control your aggressive tendencies for the sake of your teammates!”

Makoto stole a glance at Nagisa, then at Haru, but neither defended him. He couldn’t even catch Haru’s eyes.

“Rei-chan is right, Mako-chan,” said Nagisa quietly, if only because his mouth was still full. “You need to trust us and be less afraid.”

Makoto lowered his eyes and nodded in discomfort. The meeting now concluded, he said goodbye shortly after, leaving without a single bite of the food he ordered at his own expense not to impose on anyone.

* * *

_4 Days to Go!_

When Haru came down towards Makoto’s house on Saturday afternoon and spotted the cat in his hands again, he refused to slow his pace, but Makoto also refused to let go of the kitten. Haruka glared offended as he passed him and pressed forward on his own, yet Makoto remained where he was, the kitten held to his chest until he had no choice but to put it down so he could run to practice. He sprinted all the way, collapsing in the doorway of the changing area just minutes away from the start of practice. Haruka was already clad in his jammers, standing idly to the side and turning his head when he felt Makoto’s eyes trying to meet his. He would have long gone into the water, had it not been for Kou wishing to make an announcement about their training regimen, which was often interrupted by Nagisa’s cheerful interjections. Failing to catch Haru’s eyes, Makoto realized with dread that he envied those two, starved for happiness and conversation that now seemed hopelessly beyond his reach. Just a few feet away, Haruka ached with that same loneliness, but one too scared and the other too stubborn, every opportunity turned into a hopeless stalemate between them.

The moment Kou was done speaking, Haruka rushed out of the changing area towards the pool, leaving Makoto at the mercy of the vice-captain, who was adamant he would bring the new recruit up to speed or die trying. Rei told him to put on the legskin and Makoto did it almost gladly, but when Rei told him he would be learning to dive, any relief at wearing the closest to a fitting swimsuit was wiped from Makoto’s mind. His lips quivered, but he said nothing, his right to protest having been revoked except for uneasy silence.

“Don’t worry, Mako-chan, we’ll start easy,” promised Nagisa, the only person who seemed wholly unaffected by the tension that was slowly poisoning the rest, if only because no action of Makoto’s had affected his heart, where injuries tended to sting the longest.

For the first hour of practice, Makoto was paired with Nagisa, who patiently instructed him on tumbling into the water from the edge instead of the starting block. Makoto soon understood that all he had to do was roll forward into the water with his arms stretched out, meeting the nearby surface at steep angles. While Nagisa corrected his posture at each attempt, he tumbled with good form every time, emerging without any problems apart from labored breathing and some paleness of his cheek. Nagisa also praised him at every turn, obviously enjoying his role as tutor, and Makoto drank in every syllable to steel himself, all too aware that the next hour would bring nothing except a steady flow of criticism.

When the hour was up, Rei took over after Nagisa, and the first thing he did was quiz Makoto on his conceptual knowledge of swimming. There he found him largely lacking. Makoto did not admit to it outright, but he returned home every day to forget about practice, so to look into anything pertaining to backstroke or swimming in general would have been counterproductive. However, to add insult to injury, he did remark that he didn’t find it useful to think of set degree angles and water resistance when there was no way to measure them for himself, managing to offend Rei just as badly as his confession about water had offended Haruka ages ago. The fact that Makoto was one year older was the only thing that held Rei back from saying out loud what he thought of Makoto’s attitude and work morale, but he didn’t have to: his face and posture spoke volumes already. No matter how Rei looked at it, Makoto’s offenses just kept piling up, and having spent the first hour expecting yet another manifestation of his violent nature – another outburst, another injury to Nagisa, his closest friend since childhood –, Rei had unwittingly riled himself until he became a bundle of raw nerves ready to snap.

“Very well,” he said in a sharp tone. “We will skip right to practice then.”

A moment later, Rei assumed his stance on the starting block, where he explained with strained patience how to hold one’s head, and which angle made for the most stunning entry. He then performed a perfect dive to demonstrate, but when it was his turn, Makoto did not so much jump as tumble from the starting block just as Nagisa had taught him to, the water stinging him slightly as he went underneath. He came back up unharmed, but the look on Rei’s face made him wish he had sunk to the bottom.

“No, _no,_ _no, no,_ _no!_ ” cried Rei, fingers clawing at his cap since they couldn’t tear into his hair beneath it. “Please, do it _right!_ ”

Makoto lost his nerve at the last moment and tumbled again, even if he went a little farther that time. Rei’s eye began to twitch. Was the other doing this on purpose to spite him, after having followed all of Nagisa’s orders to the letter?

“If you could jump and rise almost five meters to clear a crossbar, Makoto-san,” he harped, “I’m sure you can do a proper jump here!”

Next, Makoto rolled himself with a small push of his legs, crashing hard enough after his mediocre jump to knock some air out of him. Panic didn’t consume him, but when he emerged again, his heart was pounding fiercely from the impact.

Above his head, Rei stared with vacant eyes. He no longer saw Makoto. Instead he saw eyes, everyone’s eyes staring at him, watching him fail over and over as a swimmer and as vice-captain. He ground his teeth in humiliation, but it was too late: he could no longer suppress the urge to scream.

“If you don’t jump _right now_ , Makoto-san,” he screeched with reddened cheeks, “I swear we will all stay behind _until you do it right!!_ ”

Makoto flinched at the ultimatum and lowered his eyes, the small sandcastle of confidence Nagisa had carefully built for him completely washed away by demands he couldn’t meet. He clambered out of the water and stepped onto the starting block again, curling himself into form and tucking his chin to his chest. He caught Rei from the corner of his eye. At the sound of the other’s voice, something cold and raw surged through him from his head to the tips of his toes.

“Ready… Set… **_Go!_** ”

Makoto jumped, leaping right back in time to that Thursday when Captain Mikoshiba shouted the same thing as everyone’s eyes were fixed on him, launching forward with the desperation of a prisoner swinging over the wall, not caring how hard he hit the ground as long as he was falling towards freedom. The angle was steep, but not quite right and Makoto crashed into the surface, crumpling upon contact like a broken sail.

Rei froze in horror, all his irritation suddenly replaced by the apprehension that he had gone too far. Nagisa and Haru twitched. Kou gasped and quickly shook Nagisa’s shoulder to do something, _anything,_ but by the time any of them could move, Makoto broke through the surface like a furious beast, gasping for air with his face distorted in helpless anger.

“ _There,_ _I **jumped!**_ Are you happy now?!” he shouted at Rei, his eyes raining lightning. Above him, Rei stood thunderstruck. For a moment, silence roared in their ears.

Only for a moment, though. After his outburst, Makoto whipped his head down immediately in guilt and shame, then started wading to the side blindly until he reached the nearest wall. He climbed out of the pool and stumbled towards the changing area with his head hanging, unable to look at anyone.

Haruka’s heart gave a painful leap. He and Nagisa rose to their feet, wanting to go after him, but Rei’s devastated looks stopped them in their tracks.

“I’m sorry…” he whispered after Makoto, who had since disappeared inside. Nagisa lowered his head and Haruka stared into the distance, his jaw clenched and his chest unbearably tight.

“This is no good,” sighed Nagisa, his arms curling over his chest. “Maybe we’re being too hard on Mako-chan…”

“ _I’m_ being too hard on him, not you,” said Rei, his voice thick with guilt. “But I thought that incident happened so long ago – that if Makoto-san got it right and saw he could do it, he would be over it and be confident! That was all I wanted, I swear…”

“Rei-chan…” said Nagisa, his hand settling on Rei’s back in a soothing rub.

“He needs more time,” said Haru in a hard tone, unable to look at anyone. “Let’s try something else.”

“But _what,_ Haruka-senpai?” asked Rei, sounding genuinely lost. “Makoto-san seems more aggravated every day. Something is going wrong, but I’m not sure I understand what it is.”

“Maybe he’s just scared,” said Nagisa, so close to the truth, yet always stumbling just one step away in another direction. “I mean, he’s suddenly expected to do all this swimming and be a member and contribute, but he’s still new. Maybe he feels like he’s not really one of us yet. That’s a lot of pressure for someone who can’t swim well, you know.”

“So what you’re saying is if he felt more accepted, he would be less stressed?” asked Rei, cupping his chin in thought. Nagisa gave a half-hearted nod.

“Maybe… I wish we had ordered the uniforms after all. Kou-chan was so mean, not letting us do it right away! I bet a uniform would make Mako-chan feel more like he belongs.”

“He doesn’t even have his own swimsuit yet,” Haruka reminded them. “He needs one that fits _him_ , not us,” he added a moment later in growing shame, all too aware now of having ignored his friend’s comfort for the sake of his own.

“Ah, true,” said Nagisa, scratching the back of his head with an awkward grin. “Mako-chan is pretty big. Maybe our swimsuits cut off his circulation.”

“Come now, Nagisa-kun, where could we have possibly—” began Rei, stopping cold in the middle as his face became too hot to continue. Nagisa giggled.

“His legs, of course! Orcas are bigger than dolphins, penguins or butterflies, you know,” he said with a cheeky smirk.

“Orcas..?” echoed Rei, fixing his glasses uncomfortably. “I… I suppose if we picked an animal for him, he _is_ as big and strong as an orca. If he could just swim like one, he could be king of the water…”

“He’ll get there,” said Haruka, fixing his eyes on the changing rooms again.

“That’s the spirit,” said Nagisa as he drew them both into a hug. “Come on, then! Let’s tell Mako-chan we’ll go to town tomorrow and buy his swimsuit together!”

They hurried down the stairs and into the changing room, but found it empty. All Makoto left behind was a torn out note on top of his designated cubby holes.

 _I’m sorry, everyone. Please forgive me._ — _Makoto_

“Does anyone have his phone number?” asked Rei as he grabbed his bag and reached for his phone. Haruka was the only one who nodded, having finally added Makoto’s number when his friend joined the swim club. He now dialed it for the first time, lifting the phone to his ear with his heart in his throat, but a generic voice told him the number he dialed could not be reached.

“He turned it off,” he said quietly and closed his phone. Rei nodded in embarrassment.

“Does anyone know where he lives? We could visit him!” suggested Nagisa, but Haru quickly shook his head.

“Maybe we could leave him a message,” said Rei, glancing at the phone in Haruka’s hands.

“Alright,” said Nagisa, his face determined. “But first…!”

He ran back out with the others in tow and came to a halt in front of Amakata-sensei, who had been discussing the last jump with Kou, and now gasped in terror as the three boys came towering over her.

“Ama-chan, we need your help!” spoke Nagisa. “You need to come with us tomorrow so we can buy Mako-chan a swimsuit!”

“Please come and advise us!” said Rei as he bowed his head, his hands pressed together. Ama-chan cringed.

“I um… ummm…”

“You are the only person who can help us! You worked for a swimsuit designer in Tokyo, right?” joined in Kou, all four of them locking Amakata Miho in a stare until she finally cracked under the pressure.

“Um, I uh, I’m sorry but I have something else to do on Sunday! Plus there are other brands! I have my reasons. I won’t be able to provide an objective perspective, you see!” she said in one breath as she rose from her folding chair and took off with a rapid click of her heels. _I’ll see you next practice!_ she cried from the distance, her bag whipping behind her mid-run.

“What’s with the flurry of random excuses?” muttered Rei, shooting a glare in her general direction.

“Oh well, we’ll just have to do it without her. Maybe Kou-chan will help us,” said Nagisa, giving their manager a wink. Kou flushed.

“Well… I don’t have anything else planned..!” she said, soon smiling at the unexpected but pleasant prospect of muscles and changing rooms all in the same place.

“So it’s settled!” grinned Nagisa. “Haru-chan, can you tell Mako-chan to come down to the train station?”

“Say, by nine o’clock?” added Rei in a hopeful tone. Haruka nodded, his eyes falling to the ground.

* * *

Having utterly failed Makoto, the only thing Haru could do for him at that moment was spare him the pain and humiliation of the entire swim club chasing after him, when all he clearly wanted was to hide away from them. With no directions to follow, the others had no choice but to head home together, while Haruka departed alone, scolding himself every step of the way. He told himself he should have known better, that he of all people should have paid more attention to how an ill-fitting swimsuit could affect a person... or to the fact that Makoto could have used his support, and was deprived of it for no better reason than being anxious and progressing more slowly than they had hoped. Nagisa had shown more good will and kindness to Makoto than his best friend had in days, _Nagisa_ whose hands were sore for two days after their own joint practice. Haru hung his head at the thought and heaved a bitter sigh, wondering what had upset him so much about Makoto and still unable to place his feelings. They had been burning intensely for a while now, how long, Haru could not say, but as his heart slowly filled with the desire to do more justice to the other’s character, Haru’s determination drowned out his frustrations for the present.

Though he had no intention of troubling Makoto with his presence, Haruka did stop by his friend’s house, where the white kitten was busy pouncing after a cricket near the stairs. The moment it saw Haruka, it scampered up the stairs with a reproachful mewl, having recognized the creature whose appearance always resulted in Makoto leaving. Haruka hesitated, sensing the kitten’s hostility, but in the end, he approached it and reached out his hand. The kitten lifted a paw to bat it away. Haru paused, then turned to the side, plucking a piece of spike grass that he slowly reached out to the kitten. The little one lifted its paw again, only to become mesmerized with the slight wiggle of the spike grass. What was once a warning call to stay away then became cheerful mews and rapid grabs for the spike grass, until the kitten got tired enough to fancy a nap on top of the stairs. Haruka followed it, carefully tiptoeing around it to peer into the yard, where the glass bottle held a handful of freshly plucked daisies.

Once Haruka had dinner and figured Makoto had enough time to calm down, he took out his phone to compose his first ever text message since getting the thing, having been too lazy before to so much as test the feature, let alone use it regularly. It took him almost ten minutes of mashing the small buttons to write his message, short though it was:

_It’s Haru. No practice tomorrow, but be ready by 8:30 in the morning. We’re taking you shopping._

He checked his phone every ten minutes afterwards, even in the bathtub, then lay in bed for two hours staring at the ceiling, until the phone finally started vibrating in his hand.

_1 New Message_

_From: Makoto_

**Okay. Good night, Haru.**

Haruka sighed in relief and closed his eyes. He dropped the phone blindly beside himself and nestled into his blankets, fast asleep within minutes.


	20. EPISODE 4: Captive Orca! - Part 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After leaving the note, Makoto ran all the way home, where he rushed up the stairs and sought refuge in his room before anyone could meet him in the hall. This was by no means a new development in the Tachibana household. It reoccurred, without fail, a few times every year since their move to Iwatobi, usually around the holidays; however, this year brought several such days in rapid succession, at a time when Makoto was supposed to be enjoying himself with his newfound friends, which worried Makoto’s parents and outright scared the twins.

The adults of the house were hesitant to bother Makoto on his return, as they always did their best to give their eldest child room, and let him open up at his own pace. However, the youngest shared neither their patience nor their tact. Seized by anxiety, Ran and Ren soon came tearing down Onii-chan’s door to crawl into bed with him, where they attached themselves to Makoto on either side. Makoto lay there with his face buried in his arms and wouldn’t look up at them, but after several rounds of tireless begging, he told the twins about practice and his unfortunate outburst at the vice-captain.

“Onii-chan, why don’t you just tell them the truth?” pleaded Ran once Makoto finished.

“Yeah, you should talk to them, Onii-chan!” said Ren as he gave his brother’s arm a squeeze. Makoto paused, but then shook his head, still unable to look them in the eye.

“I can’t,” he said quietly at last.

“Why not?” replied the twins in unison.

“It’s.. difficult.”

“But Onii-chan,” began Ran, “haven’t you always told us that when something is wrong…”

“…you should talk about it?” finished Ren. Makoto tensed.

“That honesty is very important in a relationship?” continued Ran.

“And communication is the key to sorting things out?” added Ren. Makoto suppressed a whine. He taught them well, that much gave him some comfort, but preachers seldom liked their own sermons thrown back in their faces.

“I have, _I have,_ but I _can’t_ ,” he told them. “This is different.”

“How is it different?” pushed Ran. Makoto sighed.

“Of course you have to tell your family when something is wrong,” he explained, glancing cautiously from one pale little face to the other. “Mom and Dad and I love you unconditionally. But Haru, and the swim club… it’s not the same. I’ve already caused enough trouble. If I told them now, that it’s all been for nothing… I just can’t, okay?”

“But Onii-chan, you’re not happy anymore!” cried Ran. “That can’t be good for anybody!”

“Yeah, you just lie in bed all the time now!” whined Ren, nudging his head hard against his brother’s arm.

“I just have to try harder,” said Makoto, his voice strained. “I’d be fine if I could just do what they want me to.”

“Onii-chan…” chided Ran, but her own voice was cracking. Makoto slowly turned his head to her as much as their clinging limbs allowed.

“Don’t follow Onii-chan’s example in this, okay?” he said in a low voice. “I know I’m being selfish and dishonest, I know that, but I can’t tell them. Not now. Not ever.”

“Not even Haru-chan?” asked Ren.

“I would sooner die than tell Haru,” said Makoto in a whisper, pressing his face in his arms again in shame for having said such a thing, and for being certain it was true. The twins waited a little more by his side, hoping he would say something more, but soon resigned themselves to cuddling him in silence until dinner, where Makoto ate little and spoke even less.

Haruka’s text message arrived some time after dessert, but Makoto kept turning the phone in his hands over and over for a while, unable to reply even though he knew the answer would be yes. The way Haru frowned at him that evening, Makoto thought his number might have been discarded like trash, but Haru had kept it after all… and if he asked for anything, Makoto would ultimately yield to the one friend he desperately wanted to keep. It simply took some time to steel himself for a response, and afterwards, it took him hours longer to fall asleep, dreading tomorrow’s ‘shopping’ till his last moment of consciousness.

* * *

_3 Days to Go!_

The next day, Haruka rose early. He was ready well before the designated time, but just in case Makoto needed encouragement or a gentle reminder, Haru left his house and walked down towards the single torii, where he might sit comfortably as he waited for the other. He didn’t have to remain there for long. Makoto slept but a few hours and woke up earlier than he had ever done on a Sunday, and so Haru spotted him stepping out the front door just minutes after he himself had sat down to wait. By the time Makoto reached the gate, Haruka walked down to meet him, his heart beating just a little faster. As if on cue, the white kitten showed up too, pattering along the top of the wooden fence around Makoto’s house.

“Good morning, Haru,” mumbled Makoto when Haruka’s face suddenly swam into view beyond the gateway. He looked as anxious as ever, but when the kitten let out a demanding mewl to his left, Makoto’s face twitched into a sheepish smile. “Good morning to you too,” he said to the kitten in the softest of voices, leaning closer so the little one could rise up on its hind paws and touch its nose to Makoto’s. Haru pursed his lips at the kitten’s shameless display. _Showoff…_

“Are you ready?” he asked Makoto as he turned his head towards the steps leading down. His friend nodded in silence, and so they began their descent, the atmosphere still muted and uneasy. Until…

“Haru..” began Makoto halfway down the road. His was voice quiet and tentative, yet Haru turned his head instantly to fix his eyes on his friend.

“Are you.. ..are you all very angry at me?” asked Makoto at last, his head hanging in what could have only been trepidation. Haruka sighed.

“Nobody’s angry at you,” he said, never taking his eyes off Makoto. “I told you, we’re taking you shopping.”

“For what..?” asked the other, finally daring to glance back.

“Swimsuit,” replied Haruka, his eyes flitting towards the sky. “You need your own, one that fits you best. We’ll get it together as a team.”

Makoto’s throat was too tight for a reply, but the way his head twitched towards Haruka, the broken gleam of his eyes, and his chest swelling as though his heart might burst spoke louder than words ever could. He fixed his eyes on the path again, but the ice that had enveloped them for the past few days had finally cracked. Haru bit his lip.

“Makoto.”

Makoto slowly turned his head to his friend again, his features still guarded.

“You can get a larger controller if you want,” said Haru, his face completely deadpan even as the other snorted in surprise and quickly lifted a hand to his hot face.

“Be quiet..” replied Makoto, but Haru could almost see the hapless smile beneath that ridiculously large hand. He turned his head, his own lips curling into a small smirk. _Finally._

“They might sell bikini bottoms, too…” he added, careful not to look Makoto in the eye.

“ _Haruuu..!_ ” cried Makoto indignantly, but for the remainder of their walk, he smiled a little more and his shoulders tensed a little less, even if no more words were exchanged along the way. Haru ran out of gall to tease, while Makoto had become too embarrassed to talk, but the silence now seemed warmer, more familiar, just as Haruka preferred it when no conversation could be had. Whenever they caught each other’s eye, Makoto shifted his head with flushed cheeks, but that only fueled Haru’s amusement, and lent the other an amiable air that kept drawing his friend’s gaze like a magnet. Haru continued to steal glances at Makoto as they passed the bay towards the station, and the more he did, the more he found himself thinking, with some strange flutter in his stomach, that there was something oddly pleasant about Makoto, something Haru was not at all averse to looking at whenever he thought the other wouldn’t notice.

* * *

The enchantment broke at last when they heard the faint cry of Nagisa calling out to them from the other side of the train station. He, Rei, and Kou were standing in a small cluster by one of the benches, waving wildly for Haruka and Makoto to come and join them. Makoto’s features tensed instantly. He lowered his head and no longer looked anywhere except the ground, but since Haruka pressed on towards their friends, Makoto let his legs carry him along, unconvinced that any number of swimsuits could help him, yet able to do nothing except believe that they might… that just this once, his friends’ hard efforts would not be shamefully wasted.

“Haru-chan, Mako-chan! Good morning!” chirped Nagisa, he and Kou beaming at the new arrivals in excitement.

“Good morning, Haruka-senpai, Makoto-san,” spoke Rei as well, his eyes carefully searching for Makoto’s, who looked up rather unwillingly and clasped his hands together like a nervous school boy.

“Good morning, everyone,” he said quietly, his eyes averted.

“Morning,” said Haruka, his eyes darting from one teammate to another, in the hope that one of them would say something and say it first, before Makoto might—

“Rei..” began Makoto, his hands separating only to curl into nervous fists by his side. _Too late_ , thought Haru with an embarrassed frown. “I’m sorry about yesterday. I shouldn’t have yelled at you. I hope you can forgive me.”

Rei stared at him for a moment, then lowered his head, his lips stretching into an awkward smile.

“I apologize too, Makoto-san,” he said in a low voice as he adjusted his glasses. “I’m afraid I got carried away. I should have been more considerate. Please forgive me.”

“It’s okay.. I know you meant well,” replied Makoto, his own smile faint but sincere. “Nagisa,” he said next, his voice growing a little weaker. “How are your hands..?”

“Mako-chaaan, I told you before they are _fine!_ ” Nagisa dismissed him with a wave. “You worry too much! I’m not that fragile, you know…” he added, puffing his cheeks in a childish pout. Makoto broke into a sheepish chuckle at the face Nagisa made. He still looked guilt-ridden and uneasy once his laughter died away, but Haruka let out a sigh of relief that Makoto’s apology was returned for a change.

“Shall we go then?” he said, now looking at the train slithering towards them in a gust of warm wind to take them to ZERO, the largest sports store in the Tottori prefecture, and the source of nearly every swimsuit Haruka, Nagisa, and Rei had bought over the years. Makoto himself had browsed the track section on his last visit, but now he was to see their water section for the first time, and once he had sufficiently warmed up in the others’ cheerful company, the prospect of browsing swimwear no longer seemed so daunting.

* * *

“There are a lot to choose from..!” breathed Kou as they began roaming down the aisles in a loose group, taking care not to wander too far from Makoto. To make up for yesterday’s disaster, Rei in particular was sticking very close to him, providing information he no longer expected Makoto to research and learn on his own. That was what knowledgeable vice-captains were for, after all.

“Fluid mechanics would tell you that Reynolds numbers and Boundary-Layer theory are the key points, but in my belief, the color also plays a psychological role,” he explained to Makoto as he gestured to the baffling range of briefs, jammers, and legskins down the aisles. “You may also wish to purchase your own swim cap and a pair of goggles, Makoto-san. You can buy prescription goggles depending on your needs, though I suppose you don’t need them if you don’t wear glasses…”

“I do have a pair, but I only use it to watch TV or play video games,” replied Makoto. Haruka stole a glance at him, his eyes lingering in curiosity as Makoto scratched his cheek with a finger. “I suppose checking them out won’t hurt.”

“Rei-chan has prescription goggles because he can’t see without his glasses,” said Nagisa. To prove his point, he playfully snatched off Rei’s glasses the next moment, jamming them on before Rei could stop him. “ _I haven’t learned any of the concepts!_ ” declared Nagisa in a voice that sounded suspiciously like a bad parody of Rei. Makoto smothered his laughter with a cough, turning his head not to seem rude.

“Give them back, Nagisa-kun! You’re going to hurt your eyes!” cried Rei as he chased after the thief, leaving Makoto to watch them run about and think to himself that, in any situation other than swimming, the two of them and their antics had quite grown on him. Haruka merely shook his head and averted his eyes, but the moment he did, he was ensnared by a new collection of jammers that required his immediate and undivided attention. He was hard at work comparing the different models by the time Rei managed to catch Nagisa and reclaim his rightful property, so the two of them found Makoto alone, Kou having drifted off towards Haruka to keep an eye on him.

“What are you waiting for, Mako-chan? Pick a swimsuit and let the trials begin!” said Nagisa, nudging him in the arm with a grin, but Makoto merely scratched the back of his head with an uneasy smile.

“I hardly know what to pick. There are so many…!”

“Perhaps you could start by choosing a color you’re fond of, Makoto-san,” suggested Rei, cupping his chin in thought. “Alternatively, you could also try something complementary, like a swimsuit that matched the color of your eyes. I think it would look really beautiful if our swimsuits matched in brand as well as a color scheme that suited us personally, but… alas—”

“Haru-chan is messing things up?” offered Nagisa, just barely holding back his giggles.

“ ** _Exactly!_** _”_ cried Rei as though he had been waiting for ages for someone to point it out. “Haruka-senpai’s eyes are blue, yet he insists on wearing purple! _It defies all reason!_ ”

“Rei-chan will never live that down,” whispered Nagisa to Makoto, who couldn’t help but chuckle at them both.

“Sorry, Rei,” he said out loud, shooting a tender glance towards the end of the aisle, where Haru had been completely seduced by a collection of purple-patterned jammers to Rei’s growing chagrin. “I guess that’s just who Haru is.”

“Besides, I think it’s fitting, Rei-chan,” said Nagisa, and Makoto could not help but notice that Rei’s features smoothed out immediately, looking to his friend with piqued curiosity. “You and Haru-chan are vice-captain and captain after all, so it makes sense that you should show your special bond by wearing each other’s colors! It will make you look distinguished!”

Rei looked baffled for a moment, but then adjusted his glasses with flushing pride. Nagisa quickly gave Makoto a wink that the other returned with a grin.

“I haven’t thought of it that way, but you are absolutely right, Nagisa-kun,” came the gracious reply. “If Haruka-senpai wishes to honor me by donning the color of the vice-captain, I shall return the gesture and choose the most stunning blue I can find to match our captain!”

“That’s the spirit, Rei-chan!” cheered Nagisa.

“Makoto-san,” said Rei, now turning to Makoto, “I’m afraid this leaves you with green, which I hope you don’t mind…”

“Not at all, Rei. Green is fine,” said Makoto, cocking his head to the side obligingly. Rei smiled in relief.

“But please, do browse and try on whatever you wish,” he continued, and so Makoto set to browsing in the aisle. His cheer subsided in the process, but being allowed some freedom before he inevitably had to look for a green legskin, he picked out an orange and white striped black legskin, bringing it to the changing booth just moments before Haruka himself finally picked out a pair of jammers. Haru abandoned everything to secure one of the changing booths and Kou followed him with narrowed eyes, thoroughly unconvinced of Haruka-senpai’s need for another swimsuit that looked exactly the same as his other ones. Haru eventually took the free booth beside Makoto’s, where Rei and Nagisa were now waiting patiently to see the first chosen article. A few minutes more and Makoto drew the curtain, his cheeks flushed.

“What do you think?” he asked as he did a slow turn for them, his ears glowing red. He had little cause for fear, though. Compared to the borrowed swimsuits that clenched him too tightly, the black legskin fit him like a glove. Nagisa flashed him a grin and a victory sign, while Rei surveyed him with a loud hum and a louder smirk.

“Legskins suit you extremely well, Makoto-san,” he concluded with obvious pleasure, glad to have a fellow swimmer on board who appreciated the advantages and fine aesthetics of the noble legskin. “Even the color orange is well-chosen, for in color psychology, it represents optimism and—”

“I’m done changing,” came Haru’s voice from the next booth before Rei could finish. The curtains were drawn a moment later to present Haruka’s latest choice, a pair of black and purple jammers. “What do you think?”

 _Oh god, I can’t tell how it’s different from his other swimsuits,_ thought Makoto when he poked his head into Haruka’s booth to take a look. Rei eyed the captain’s jammers with confused approval, but Nagisa furrowed his brow.

“Isn’t it the same as your other one?” he ended up asking.

“No. I like the way this one fits better,” replied Haruka with a small, content smile, his cheeks a light pink. Makoto gave him a look. Nagisa, however, seemed delighted.

“Rei-chan, let’s try some on now!” he pleaded, seizing Rei by his wrist to drag him off. Rei valiantly protested, claiming he might be more usefully employed assisting Makoto-san, but Makoto himself did not have the heart to say no to Nagisa. He scratched the back of his head and assured Rei it was fine, and a moment later, Kou kindly volunteered to guard everybody’s backpacks while they browsed. With everything settled, Makoto soon ventured away on his own in an attempt to find the green legskin Rei had recommended, while Kou perched himself on a nearby bench, ready to be indulged. _Changing rooms and muscles…_ she thought to herself, her cheeks growing hot in excitement. _Now there’s a nice combo you don’t see every day!_

She was not disappointed. Within minutes, the fashion show for the perfect swimwear began, and there was almost always somebody whose body was to be admired, his chosen suit critically examined, and if need be, a new suit recommended. Now that the boys had been separated, they covered larger and larger areas of the aquatic sports section, from whence they managed to return with some fantastic choices, from swim briefs and jammers to legskins, and even bodyskins. Everyone was soon in high spirits in a race to pick the best attainable swimsuit on the market, and if Kou thought she could never grow tired of muscles, an hour’s frantic changes had convinced her that even she had her limits. By the time the captain showed off his fourth black and purple jammers, their manager was convinced that much of a good thing could be just as tiresome as too little of it.

* * *

Kou eventually excused herself and retired to the hallway for a drink, thoroughly glad she was afforded a short but much needed walk to the vending machine.

 _I’m exhausted_ , she thought to herself as she fished out a can of soda from the bottom slot. _Now I know how guys feel when they have to go shopping with girls…_

She sighed and straightened just as someone had passed through the gate, and a moment later, a familiar voice reached her ears, one she hadn’t heard in quite a while.

“Hey! Fancy meeting you here..!”

Kou blinked in surprise and whirled around, her hands clasping around her drink.

“Captain Mikoshiba…!”

“Are you shopping too, Gou-san?” asked Seijuurou, but before Kou could reply, he threw his hands on his hips with a happy grin. “Ha, ha! See? I remembered! No more Gou-ku—”

The look on Kou’s face made him freeze mid-sentence and lift his hands apologetically.

“Well, like I said, I will only call you Gou-san from now on!” continued Mikoshiba, obviously proud of his prodigious memory and hard efforts. Kou gave him an awkward smile in return, but after a moment’s hesitation, that smile shifted into fierce determination.

“Captain Mikoshiba..?”

“Yes, Gou-san?” replied Seijuurou, more than happy to say her name as often as possible.

“It’s pronounced _Kou_.”

Seijuurou blinked. Kou waited.

“Kou?” repeated the captain. “Kou…chan..?”

Kou gave him a funny look. Mikoshiba chuckled.

“Kou- _san?_ ”

That was when Kou’s features relaxed into one of those delightful smiles Seijuurou had been longing to see. He found himself grinning widely in return.

“Kou-san, then!” he said, now more than happy to commit the new pronunciation to his memory. “Are you shopping, too?”

“Oh, no, not really… I’m with the Iwatobi Swim Club, they want to buy our fourth member a swimsuit,” explained Kou. Mikoshiba quirked a brow.

“The one that failed his dive?”

“Yes,” replied Kou, glancing away. Mikoshiba lifted his hands again.

“Sorry, how rude of me. What’s his name again? Is he feeling better?”

“Tachibana Makoto, and yes, he is,” said Kou, her features tentative. If Mikoshiba had obliged her thus far, he might be more helpful yet… “Although, he _is_ struggling with swimming. Do you have any advice?”

“Struggling?” echoed Seijuurou. “What is the problem?”

“He seems to be afraid of diving and he swims very aggressively…” said Kou, shooting a glance towards the store, as if afraid Makoto might hear.

“Sounds nervous to me,” replied Seijuurou with a shrug. “He needs to loosen up. I think it’s good you took him shopping, Kou-san. We are also shopping for swimsuits, it’s great!”

“ _We…?_ ” repeated Kou, her eyes wide. “Does that mean… my brother is here…?”

“Of course! I think he’s still inside—” replied Seijuurou, but before he could finish, Kou swooped past him crying, _Thank you very much, goodbye!_

The captain stared after her in disappointment, but lenient as he was, it soon gave way to other, more agreeable feelings, so Mikoshiba shook his head with a smile and stepped up to the vending machine to get himself a drink, wondering how Matsuoka could remain so cold and reserved when there was a lovely sister waiting to dote on him every turn. _If only she would dote on me half as much_ , he thought to himself, so absorbed in daydreaming that a small queue had formed behind him by the time he caught himself and claimed his drink.

* * *

Back inside, Haruka pulled the curtain open again, stepping forward in search of anyone who might lend their opinion, but Kou was nowhere to be seen. He waited, eyes panning from one side to the other, and when the curtain of the adjacent booth was drawn apart, he found that instead of Makoto, the boy who stepped out appeared to be some stranger in a tacky leather print legskin – a stranger who seemed eerily familiar.

“Nitori?” he heard the other say in a dull voice just before he turned his head. Their eyes met, both freezing as their hearts skipped a beat.

“Haru?!”

“Rin..!”

They stared at each other for what seemed an eternity, the silence oppressive, until a faint voice – Nagisa’s – pierced the cold void and slapped Rin in the face.

“Ooh, this would be perfect for you, Mako-chan!” they heard him say some ways away.

“Where did you find that controller brief?!” came Makoto’s weary cry a moment later. Rin scoffed with a loud _Tch_ , if only because Haruka’s attention was in danger of permanently drifting away in that direction.

“I want to talk to you,” Rin said to him, shooting a glance at the others, who were thankfully out of earshot and too occupied with their swimsuit hunt to notice him. “Come with me.”

Despite his misgivings, Haruka nodded.

* * *

Once they put their clothes back on and slipped away from the changing area unseen, Rin led Haru out the back to the fence surrounding ZERO, where no one would be around to witness their conversation except the soft shades of hedges and sun-soaked trees. Haruka soon stopped, unwilling to stray far from the doorway, but Rin kept walking and eventually threw his back against the fence a few meters away. The distance seemed not to bother him. It almost appeared deliberately chosen.

“Haru,” began Rin, his voice ringing harsh and clear across the yard. “What have you been doing for the past three years? You’re better than this.”

Haru quirked his brow, his voice barely above its usual volume, but filled with the static of some fuzzy undercurrent he couldn’t trace. Was it nerves? Or was it more than that..?

“I’m not better than someone who just got back from Australia,” he replied, his shoulders tense as though they had been hung on wires. Rin gritted his teeth.

“ _Are you mocking me?_ ”

“I’m not,” came the earnest reply. “You won the race.”

“It would’ve been hard _not_ to beat you, given the shape you’re in,” scoffed Rin. Haru narrowed his eyes.

“A win is a win. You won. Isn’t that good enough?” he said, turning his head away.

“It’s **_not!_** I want a _real_ race!” snapped Rin, his chest growing so tight he slumped against the fence and hung his head. “Or else.. I can’t move on,” he said more quietly, almost forlorn. Haruka’s chest grew colder with each word, his heart threatening to burst, but when it did, it flared with a warmth that filled him to the brim and brought forth a voice – the echo of a memory.

_I understand he was upset, but that’s no excuse for blaming you._

Haru’s lips twitched, his features hardening as he finally managed to place own feelings, a mixture of annoyance and anger that Rin sounded like a broken record even after all this time, that he had the audacity to tug on the hooks that had just begun to heal at Makoto’s words.

“You’re a pain,” he said at last in a whisper, and the moment he did, the chills that once seized him melted completely. Haruka proceeded to turn away, feeling no more than mild irritation that he had been dragged away when he was supposed to find Makoto a swimsuit.

“I only swim free,” he said out loud as he began walking back towards the entrance. “I won’t swim for you.”

He expected Rin to yell and argue. That was simply the other’s way, but what followed Haru instead was a flurry of quickening footsteps, until he was seized by the shoulder and flung against the fence hard enough to knock some air out of him. Rin was upon him in an instant and cornered him, his hands clinging to the chain links by Haruka’s shoulders like hungry claws.

“ _No,_ ” he said, his voice a snarl. “You’re going to swim for me.”

He locked Haru in a cold, determined stare, but deep beneath the quiver of Haruka’s chest, that small flame began to stir again.

_He was unfair, and it was wrong._

Haruka’s fingers tensed against the fence as those words trickled over him like liquid fire, then released the chain links to carefully circle Rin’s lower arm. He touched him just barely, but his calm expression and sudden contact ignited Rin’s face in alarm, the alarm of a frightened child who never thought he would be met with resistance.

“In that case, I want you to promise me something,” began Haruka, staring him down even as Rin’s eyes darted to his arm that seemed to burn under Haru’s clinging fingers. “If you lose, don’t say you’re going to quit. Don’t embarrass yourself,” said Haru, slowly advancing on Rin, who instinctively shrunk backwards. “Don’t cry if you lose!”

His final words struck Rin in the face. For one moment, his masked slipped completely to reveal raw shame and guilt – but only for a moment. Defiance immediately washed over him in waves, and Rin finally tore himself away from Haruka.

“Tch. I’m not a little kid anymore,” he spat, his own posture just as tense as Haruka’s had been when they began. “This time I’ll make it clear how different we are.”

Haru let the firm resolve of his glare be the answer. Rin returned it with one of his own, at least until the silence had grown weak and uncomfortable, forcing him to finally end the conversation while its conclusion was still in his favor.

“Try to build some muscle before the prefectural tournament. We’ll settle things there,” he said as he walked off, and when Haru wouldn’t reply, he simply added, “See you at the tournament.”

Haruka no longer had any reason to stay, yet he stood there for a while longer as Rin’s small figure melted into the distance, leaving nothing but new hooks and chains in his heart, which would remain firmly rooted until the prefectural tournament. At least they wouldn’t ache for long this time, he thought to himself. The prefectural tournament was almost upon them. A few more weeks, and Haru would shake himself free once and for all.

His arms fell to his sides as he relaxed, unaware that just beyond the corner, Kou had heard everything and squashed herself against the wall with mixed feelings, unsure if she should talk to Haruka-senpai or pretend she had heard nothing at all. She hesitated, but before she could truly make up her mind, the matter was decided by sheer coincidence.

“There she is!” cried Nagisa behind her back, and the sear of embarrassment that overcame Kou for having eavesdropped convinced her she should say nothing at present. She spun around to the others, to find they had made their purchases while she was gone, Makoto looking as pleased and hopeful as everyone could expect him to be.

“Is something wrong?” he asked Kou, who let out a nervous laugh, hurrying over lest they come any closer and Haru might hear them.

“N-No, it’s nothing!” she said with a frantic wave of her hands. “Why don’t we go back inside?”

Nagisa broke into a cheeky grin.

“Are you looking for Samezuka’s captain, Kou-chan?” he asked in an innocent tone. Kou colored.

“I’m not looking for anybody!”

“Really?”

“ _Nagisa-kun!_ ” chided Rei.

“Actually, that reminds me…” said Makoto, his brow creasing. “Have you seen Haru?”

“I’m here,” came Haruka’s voice from behind Kou’s back, startling her into a yelp. “Is something wrong?”

“It’s nothing,” mumbled Kou with flushed cheeks. “We’re ready to leave, Haruka-senpai.”

“Just a minute,” replied Haruka to Kou’s horror, but his eyes flitted from her to Makoto’s shopping bag. “I still need to buy that swimsuit,” he finished, then hurried past them to purchase the pair that fit him best.

Outside, Kou sighed in relief. The secret would remain hers, for now.


	21. EPISODE 4: Captive Orca! - Part 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

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> One of the last few edits I made for the story. Enjoy!

_2 Days to Go!_

The next day, Makoto put down the kitten the moment he had spotted Haru coming down the stone steps, but his smiles and laughs reeked of anxiety, and he hardly spoke unless he was prompted. The way he kept his eyes carefully on the path and struggled to maintain idle conversation irked Haruka, but it was now the irritation of a worried heart that didn’t want to see time revert again, not when yesterday’s venture turned out far better than any of them had hoped. Not even Rin could spoil his silent contentment when he realized they had all bought matching swimsuits and Makoto was now equipped with every necessity for success. Nevertheless, the other looked as though he had hardly slept, and his self-confidence seemed wavering again. Haruka told him it would be fine, he must have said it a dozen times in the course of the morning, but Makoto’s smiles remained fake, just as ephemeral as yesterday’s fleeting pleasures. The happy effects of those pleasures at least proved more permanent. Makoto finally owned good quality swimwear, and everyone was disposed to be gentle with him from now on. With these factors combined, Haruka now had greater hopes of producing the fourth swimmer they had been wanting for so long.

Makoto’s duffel bag had been filled to the brim once more, but when they reached the changing area, some of its cargo changed owners as Makoto proceeded to return the swimsuits the others had given him, freshly washed and carefully folded. He thanked each of them, no matter how he felt about the articles in question, was cordially or even cheerfully thanked for taking good care of his hand-me-downs, and the moment he was done changing into his own swimsuit, Nagisa asked him to stand on the starting block so they could get a good look at him. Makoto now had his own swim cap, a pair of green-tinted goggles, and a flattering black and green legskin. At Nagisa’s request, he climbed up, then made a turn with flushed cheeks to the sound of a modest but heart-felt round of applause, which might as well had been silence for all Makoto heard of it.

“You look like a world-class swimmer, Makoto-san,” said Rei with an earnest smile.

“Yup! This just might do the trick!” said Kou, her eyes running laps up and down the winding patterns of Makoto’s legskin.

“Are you ready, Mako-chan?” asked Nagisa with an eager look, finally startling Makoto out of his trance.

“Ready for what..?” he replied, his voice and act faltering at once.

“To swim backstroke, of course!”

“Eh?!” balked Makoto, his large frame steadily shrinking. “But I haven’t learnt it yet..!”

“We are aware of that, Makoto-san, so we thought we would teach you the basics you would need for backstroke today,” explained Rei in a patient tone as he walked over to Makoto’s starting block. “Once you finish warming up, I will be teaching you the dolphin kick.”

Makoto’s face slowly thawed out, until he managed a nod and a weak smile. The dolphin kick didn’t sound nearly as dangerous as diving, after all.

“Alright,” he said quietly. Rei smirked.

“Wonderful! Please come with me, Makoto-san, Nagisa-kun, Haruka-sen—”

Before he could finish, Haruka flew past them in a perfect dive, leaving them behind with a series of rapid kicks.

“—pai…” sighed the vice-captain, but he soon flashed the others a smile and shrugged his shoulders. “The three of us, then. Let us begin! Please sit still with your legs apart and lean your upper body forward. Hold twenty seconds…”

* * *

Unsure if he would be allowed in the pool once Makoto’s instruction began, Haruka took the opportunity to swim a few laps while they conducted their exercises. He needn’t have bothered to be so swift, though. All the dolphin kick required was for Makoto to hold onto the railing by the edge as Rei instructed him to roll his body like a whip, until the power of his kick shifted from his legs to his core. Makoto was determined to please him, or at the very least avoid giving any cause for displeasure, so within half an hour of constantly searching for the right rhythm, his motions began to look and feel the part of a powerful dolphin kick.

“You are doing very well, Makoto-san,” Rei commended him when Makoto finally managed to maintain his wave for a solid minute. “Your kick seems quite strong, which will help you greatly in adjusting yourself after your dive and during the turn. I’m very pleased..!”

Rei meant his words to be encouraging, but Makoto’s fluid kicks twitched to a stop by the time he finished.

“Once I _dive…?_ ” Makoto echoed the vice-captain, his eyes widening in horror. “But Nagisa said there was no diving for backstroke!”

“Ah, ha ha, I did say that, didn’t I…?” spoke Nagisa with a sheepish laugh that had Makoto paling till he turned white as chalk. Rei adjusted his goggles.

“To be fair, Nagisa-kun was partially correct.. Backstroke does not require a standard dive, which we only wanted to teach you so you could enter any body of water with greater ease, Makoto-san,” he explained, his voice relatively calm. “However, backstroke does have an entry that you will have to learn in order to compete in tournaments.”

“What is the entry?” asked Makoto, as he still hadn’t looked into his intended stroke’s mechanics for fear he would find them impossible to master. The apologetic smile on Rei’s face confirmed his darkest suspicions.

“It’s kind of a backwards dive,” said Nagisa with a scratch of his head.

“ _What?!_ ” cried Makoto.

“Allow me to explain, Makoto-san!” cut in Rei, shooting Nagisa a look of _Say no more_. “For the entry, you have to assume your position beneath the starting block by grasping onto the handle, elevating yourself up and out of the water with your feet planted on the wall, and on the signal, you must propel yourself outwards and upwards for your entry.”

“But, diving _backwards?_ ” repeated Makoto, his voice rising by a whole octave. “I can’t even dive forward! What if I can’t do it?!”

“Now, now, Mako-chan..” said Nagisa in a soothing tone and a light wave of his hands. “I’m sure that once you get the hang of it, it’ll be easy-peasy!”

“I don’t even know what it looks like, can any of you do it?” asked Makoto, his voice verging on full panic. Rei froze.

“I… I’m afraid I have never done it myself, Makoto-san—”

“Rei-chan can’t swim anything except butterfly, remember?” said Nagisa. “If he did the backstroke entry, he would just sink to the bottom and never come up again!”

“ _Nagisa-kun!_ ”

“What about you then? Can _you_ do it?” begged Makoto, but Nagisa shook his head with an awkward smile that grew sadder by the minute.

“I’ve never done it either, Mako-chan.. it was always Rin-chan who swam backstroke, you see. I wanted to learn backstroke too, but he said I wasn’t the right build for it…”

“Haru…?” asked Makoto, his voice a broken whisper, but Haruka could only stare back wordlessly. He had never bothered to learn the backstroke entry. There was nothing he could do for Makoto.

“ _Please_ , Makoto-san,” Rei pleaded him, just barely keeping his voice even. “Listen to my instructions, I’m sure that if you visualize it in your head, you will be able to do it!”

“But, Rei—”

“Makoto-san,” Rei interrupted him, his voice warm and desperate, “If you do it even once, all of us will be very proud of you.”

Makoto’s jaws slackened, his shoulders crumbling downwards as though he could hardly believe his own ears. Rei tried for a smile. Even Haru swam closer and nodded in the affirmative. Some ways away, Kou and Ama-chan were on the edge of their seats.

“Do it just once, Mako-chan..” said Nagisa, his eyebrows quirked in hopeful arches. “I know you can do it if you try..!”

“Please, Makoto,” Haru joined them and Makoto’s eyes fell to the depths of the water, his resistance thoroughly broken. In asking for the impossible, they dropped the bar to a single attempt – who was he to argue when everyone expected so little of him at this stage? He shifted towards the nearest starting block, ushered by a light touch of his shoulder by Rei, who did his best to explain the position to Makoto as he attached himself to the handle bar and crouched upon the wall like a giant, nervous spider. Rei explained the entry step by step, his words as bland as the text book whose instructions he regurgitated for Makoto, repeating the process three times so the other could memorize it.

“Now, the moment you enter the water, you must use the dolphin kick I taught you,” added Rei in the end, by which time Makoto had been clutching the handle for over ten minutes and his legs were beginning to cramp from bracing himself entirely too hard. “The dolphin kick will allow you to advance until you reach the surface, at which point you would have to begin your backstroke. All we want you to do now is dive in and use the dolphin kick. The moment you’re on the surface, you may simply float. Do you follow, Makoto-san?”

Makoto forced out a hum. Rei nodded and backed away until he reached the side. He quickly hoisted himself up and out of the pool for a better view.

“On my mark…” he said and everyone else retreated too, their fists clenched in unison.

“Set…”

Makoto tensed.

“ ** _Go!_** _”_

Makoto twitched and launched himself away from the wall with as much strength as his cramped muscles could muster, contorting himself into a grotesque rainbow and spreading his arms instinctively in panic as he cut across the air and crashed below the surface. He had nearly sunk to the bottom by the time he recalled the dolphin kick, and began thrusting his chest and hips, but the motion he had practiced on his stomach seemed completely alien to him when he was upside down and sinking steadily below. The more he kicked and thrashed, the more he sank, until his head knocked against the bottom of the pool. At the sudden contact, Makoto surged upward in raw terror, clawing himself to the surface and coughing water the moment he reached it. Around him, everyone stood frozen. Even Kou and Ama-chan were staring breathlessly.

“Makoto-san…?” whispered Rei as Makoto’s chest kept jumping wildly, looking at no one except his own melted reflection. “You forgot to pull your arms together.. and the dolphin kick…”

“What happened, Mako-chan..?” asked Nagisa, his eyebrows creasing. Makoto’s shoulders hunched in shame. “Why did you panic?”

Makoto’s lips parted as though he wanted to scream, but nothing came out, not even air.

“Say something, Makoto-san…” pleaded Rei. Makoto clenched his jaws, unable to look up lest he see their disappointment and hate himself completely for having shattered their hopes.

“I’m sorry..” he managed to force out with pained hiss, looking up no more as he turned away from them and waded to the edge of the pool near Rei. He climbed out and took a few winding steps, until he collapsed by the corner of the chain link fence with his head buried in his arms. His back seemed to quake a little. The silence was deafening, and what broke it in the end was a soft splash as Rei slid into the water, drifting towards Nagisa and Haruka with his head hung in defeat.

“I’m sorry, Haruka-senpai, Nagisa-kun,” he whispered, just barely able to speak. “I don’t know how to help Makoto-san.”

“Rei-chan…” breathed Nagisa. Haruka drew a little closer, his face tense and pale.

“Perhaps it would be better if… if we did not depend on Makoto-san for the upcoming tournament,” added Rei in a thick voice. “It’s too much pressure for someone who cannot swim at all.”

“He can swim,” said Haruka through his teeth. “You saw that he could swim. He’s just…”

“He’s _what_ , Haruka-senpai?” begged Rei. Even Nagisa stared at him wide-eyed, but Haru could tell them nothing beyond what they already knew, that the joint practice with Samezuka seemed to have irreversibly damaged Makoto.

“Poor Mako-chan..” moaned Nagisa, glancing to the corner where Makoto remained motionless except for the slight shake of his shoulders.

“It’s such a shame, though..” sighed Rei, unable to look at anyone except Makoto in the distance. “I’ve been longing to see Makoto-san swim backstroke ever since we decided it would suit him, but I’m afraid we never will. When he has such a beautiful body, too.. he was practically built for a long-axis stroke…”

Nagisa hung his head. Even Kou and Ama-chan shook theirs with sad looks as if they had heard the others and agreed. Haruka’s eyes widened and his fists clenched beside him, turning his head roughly in Makoto’s direction. His heart was thumping inside, its beat so savage Haru struggled to find his voice again.

“Rei. Nagisa,” he forced out at last, his eyes hard. “Tell everyone to go home. I’ll talk to him.” He then ducked under water before anyone could protest, slithering off towards the edge on his way to Makoto.

“But, Haruka-senpai—” began Rei far too late to stop him, then pulled back by Nagisa as he took a step to follow.

“Now, now, Rei-chan,” he said gently, giving Rei’s arm a squeeze. “Let the captain do some work every once in a while, eh?”

Rei blinked at him and turned his head towards Haruka again, who had since climbed out to approach Makoto with silent steps, stopping a few feet away from him as if waiting for the others to leave.

“Alright. Let’s go, Nagisa-kun,” said Rei quietly and they left the pool too, soon slipping out the back to escort Ama-chan-sensei to her car.

* * *

“It’ll be fine, you’ll see,” said Ama-chan as the four of them walked down the narrow pathway towards the car park. “Remember the wise words of Edison. Genius is one percent inspiration and ninety-nine percent perspiration.”

“So what you’re saying is that hard work will always triumph over natural talent,” said Kou with her chin cupped in thought, unable to help but think that his brother used to say something similar himself, usually in relation to Haruka.

“I guess he’ll have to keep practicing,” sighed Rei, spurring himself to say it no matter how little he believed it. To give into despair would have been to fail Makoto completely, the way almost everyone had given up on Rei himself back when he first started out, everyone except Nagisa and Coach Sasabe. He now swam a capable butterfly, even if that was the extent of his prowess, and if there was hope for him, Rei had to believe there was hope for Makoto too.

“However,” continued Ama-chan, “you could also interpret Edison’s quote to mean that hard work means nothing without that spark of inspiration, don’t you think?”

“Eh?!” cried her students in unison and Amakata Miho blinked, wondering why everyone was looking at her like she had said something horrible.

* * *

The voices of the others soon ebbed away completely, but even with the silence screaming in his ears, Makoto wouldn’t move from his seat. Once the initial shock had died down, a fog descended upon his world and enveloped him in entropy, leaving him with nothing except that all-consuming feeling of fatigue that seeped into his bones and turned his insides into sludge. Haruka stepped closer, but Makoto seemed not to notice him, not until the other entered the corner of his vision. Makoto turned his head just barely. Haru steeled himself.

“Makoto.”

The other wouldn’t look at him, not even when Haru lowered himself and sat down beside Makoto, careful not to stare.

“Talk to me.”

“I can’t, Haru,” said Makoto, his eyes boring into the ground. “I don’t know what to say.”

“Just tell me what’s wrong,” replied Haruka, hazarding a glance at him. “I’m listening.”

Makoto’s heart started jumping. His throat filled at once, as if the poisoned well inside him might spill and drain at last if Haruka himself was knocking on the gates. If he could just find the courage to tell Haru the unspeakable, that all of this had been a terrible mistake, Makoto could finally cave in on his own empty husk and it would be over. No more practice. No more swim club… and _no more Haru……_

His throat clamped shut in an instant and the terrible truth sank to the bottom of his stomach. All that remained were a few scraps of the surface, yet Makoto’s mouth opened in relief so profound it nearly broke his heart.

“It’s me,” he said quietly and lowered his eyes, unable to look his friend in the eye. “I’m so sorry, Haru.. I should have never joined the swim club. Can you forgive me?”

Haruka’s eyes widened, his chest growing tight. “Forgive you..?”

Makoto hung his head.

“On the day I joined, I thought all that talk about backstroke and relays was just to convince me that you needed four members to be an official swim club, that it was a requirement so you and your friends could attend practice and swim together again. I never intended to swim with you, Haru. I only joined to fill your quota, so you would be happy.”

Haruka stared at him wordlessly, his heart sinking as Makoto broke into a small, tired smile.

“At first, everything was great. Everyone was happy and I felt really wanted, even though I was just filler,” explained Makoto, his voice thinner and thinner as he went on. “But then.. everybody expected me to learn how to swim, I was told I had to or you wouldn’t be able to enter tournaments, but Haru, _I just_ _can’t do it_. The more I try, the worse it gets – it’s like joint practice over and over and over again. This isn’t what I wanted! I joined the swim club so your friends could swim with you. But now, now I’m just a burden who’s holding everybody back, and everyone seems to think I did it _on purpose_ , that I wasted your time and hurt Nagisa because I’m a stupid, selfish, aggressive jerk! It’s terrible and I don’t know how to fix it. I’ve never felt so hopeless and worthless in my life.”

By the time he finished, Makoto’s voice cracked and Haruka’s eyes were gleaming, his heart jolting with every word. Makoto lowered his head and pressed his chin to the fold of his arms, hugging his legs tightly to himself just as he had done so in the Samezuka restroom ages and ages ago.

“I don’t even understand why I have to swim,” he said, his voice completely worn. “I thought all Nagisa and Rei wanted was to swim with you. Why do you even need me..?”

Haruka’s face hardened in confusion.

“Same reason we formed the swim club. We wanted to swim with our friends,” he replied, and when Makoto gave no sign of having understood, Haru shot him a glare.

“Idiot… You’re a friend too.”

It was almost comical to watch Makoto whip up his head and stare at Haru in utter disbelief, but more than anything, Haruka felt the pain and shame of it as they lay shattered at the bottom of their downward spiral, forced to pick themselves up from a million broken pieces.

“And you’re not hopeless or worthless,” he continued, his tone strained. “If you had been with us from the beginning, you might have been the captain.”

“Don’t tease me, Haru…”

“I’m _not_ teasing you,” snapped Haruka. “You know how to take care of others. You look out for everyone and give them support. That’s what _real_ captains do. That’s what a team needs and you’re better at it than anyone. So.. from now on, you can do that whenever you want.”

“Haru..” sighed Makoto, though that sad little smile had returned to his face. “You and I both know I could never be the captain, not even for pretend. I’m not even fit to be a swim club member. I’m sorry.”

Haruka’s fists clenched helplessly, his chest growing tight again, yet some defiant spark still burned within him, his last hope on the brink of losing his best friend.

“Makoto,” he said, forcing himself to look at the other. “If you _could_ swim backstroke, would you swim with—” He bit his lip before he could say something selfish. “…with the team?”

Makoto tensed and wrapped his arms just a little tighter around himself, but when he saw Haru’s face, eyes large and lips ajar, he forced a nod and averted his eyes. It was no more than a hypothetical question at this point, nothing but foolish fancy. It couldn’t hurt anymore to let Haru know the answer would have been yes… except Haruka’s eyes widened in a flurry of erratic heartbeats. Hope seized him, and the next moment, he clenched his fists and rose from his seat.

“Come with me,” he said, his face aglow in determination.

“Haru..” began Makoto, but when he looked up, Haru’s hand was already held out to him. Makoto reached out instinctively to take it, his hold tentative and lax even as Haruka squeezed his hand and pulled him over to the pool.

“We’ll dive in,” he said, only to feel Makoto’s hand twitch out of his grasp.

“Haru, I can’t..!”

“You can’t because you dive like you’re trying to attack the water,” said Haruka. “Don’t _charge_ at it. Jump in like you just want to slip through it.” Makoto’s shoulders tensed, his hands clasped together. Haru suppressed a sigh. “Watch me, okay?”

He stepped onto the nearest starting block and Makoto followed him to the one next to it, his face pale as Haruka bent down to perform a long, arched dive, which seamlessly turned into a series of dolphin kicks until Haru rose to the surface a few meters away.

“Try _slipping_ through the water,” he said from below as he straightened himself. “It’ll be alright. I’m here.”

Makoto sighed and reluctantly lowered himself into position, bracing himself for an eternity before he finally launched into the air and screwed his eyes shut. His arms shot forward rigidly, remaining together as he carved an opening, and when he finally opened his eyes, he was gliding towards the bottom past Haruka’s legs. He scrambled to his feet. His friend was by his side a moment later, Haru’s hand just barely touching his back.

“That was good,” he said as Makoto gasped for air. “You did it. What did you do differently?”

“I… I closed my eyes,” admitted Makoto. Haruka quirked his brow, but when he spoke again, his tone was calm and gentle.

“That’s fine. If that helps, you can close your eyes. Just remember to do the dolphin kick once you’re in the water.”

Makoto nodded, his chest still fluttering. Haru waded to his side.

“Lie on your back now.”

“ _No..!_ ” blurted Makoto at once, hanging his head the moment he said it. Haru’s shoulders dropped.

“Makoto...”

The other tensed, one hand wringing his wrist.

“I know why you’re afraid of diving, but why are you afraid of _this?_ ”

Makoto lifted his head just barely, and a few more scraps tore from him like flowers in a storm.

“Nagisa told me backstroke was ‘swimming blindly,’ not knowing where the water takes you or what lurks underneath… but Haru, it’s hard enough for me to swim as it is. All of you get to see where you’re going and diving is enough for you, while I’m expected to do everything backwards and nobody can show me how. It’s so frustrating, not being able to relate to anyone.. it makes me feel all alone.”

Haruka stared at him, his chest swelling in a slow, warm beat.

“Makoto.. did you know that backstroke is also called the back crawl?”

“The back crawl…?” echoed Makoto. Haru nodded.

“Upside-down freestyle,” he added. Makoto’s shoulders slackened, his eyes lighting up in realization.

“So.. you and I—”

“…are two sides of the same coin,” finished Haruka and Makoto stared at him wordlessly, until his lips twitched into a hopeful smile that painted Haru’s cheeks bright pink. He lowered his eyes and extended his arm, his hand hanging limply in the air.

“You can hold onto me if you need to,” he said, his ears feeling hot. “Lie on your back, okay? There’s nothing lurking underneath the water. It’s just you and me.”

After a moment’s hesitation, Makoto reached out and carefully took Haru’s wrist, lowering himself by degrees until he managed to drape himself across the surface. His touch felt hot, but still sent shivers up Haru’s skin as he joined Makoto and let himself float beside him. The other gave a small, startled noise. Haru turned his head.

“You’re fine,” he said to Makoto. “Breathe evenly and start paddling with your feet.”

Makoto took a deep breath and began kicking his feet, his hand tightening on Haru’s wrist.

“Don’t kick the water,” said Haruka, keeping his voice low and even. “Relax your feet and paddle gently. Move from your hips.”

Makoto stared at him guiltily, but he took a series of quick breaths and began to move his legs more slowly. Up and down, up and down his feet went, still tense, but no longer thrashing.

“It’s called the flutter kick. It helps steady your body while you swim,” explained Haru as his own feet picked up Makoto’s rhythm. With both in motion, the two of them now drifted away from the starting blocks. The moment he could feel himself move in earnest, Makoto’s eyes darted from Haruka to the water around him, no longer breathing evenly and soon kicking his feet more forcefully, as though he were afraid of sinking. Haru took a deep breath and let out a sigh, bracing himself to tell Makoto something he never thought he would ever say to anyone.

“Makoto..” he began, nudging his arm just barely in the other’s hold. Makoto’s hand fluttered for a moment and then settled a little lower, his fingers closing over Haru’s palm. Haru’s heart skipped a beat. “When you look up, what do you see?”

Makoto’s eyes had been roaming frantically, but now stopped with a surprised blink. He slowly fixed his gaze on the soft swirls of pastel clouds.

“I see the sky,” he replied, his voice calmer than his grasping hand.

“You once told me you preferred land and air to water,” said Haruka. “Do you like the sky?”

“I do,” said Makoto. Haru sighed in relief.

“When you swim backstroke, you don’t have to face the water head on. You don’t even need to think of the water,” he said, his face scrunching up a bit. “So just.. _ignore_ the water, and think of the sky. Okay?”

“But, Haru..” spoke Makoto, turning his head to look at the other with his brow creasing. “If I look at the sky, I won’t see where I’m going. What if I break into the next lane? What if I hit the wall..?”

“There’s a trick to that,” mused Haru as he dove into the archives of his mind for the explanation Rin had given Nagisa several years ago. “You have to learn how many strokes it takes from the five-meter line to the wall and count down when you reach it. Then you’ll know when to make the turn. We’ll count them once your backstroke gets better.”

“But I don’t even know how to do the stroke..” said Makoto. Haruka closed his fingers on his friend’s hand with a soft squeeze before he let go, turning onto his stomach beside him.

“Remember the front crawl?” he replied. “Just do the front crawl backwards.”

“Haru..” breathed Makoto, his hand twitching instinctively for the hand that released it. Haruka shook his head.

“Just try it. I’m right here,” he said, and to refresh Makoto’s memory, he carefully shifted into a slow front crawl. The steady mill of his arms soon pulled Haruka forward, away from Makoto, and too scared of being left behind, Makoto took a deep breath and drew his arm backwards, dipping below for the first time. His feet gave a few hurried kicks, then stopped abruptly to soften into the semblance of a flutter kick. With a few forceful sweeps of his arms, he caught up to Haruka, who gave him a small, heartfelt smile.

“That’s it,” he said quietly, the two of them now advancing side by side at a slow, even pace. “Just keep doing that. You are now swimming backstroke.”

“But I still don’t know how to do the turn, or the entry…” said Makoto, his eyes clouding again.

“We’ll teach you the turn when you get more confident,” replied Haruka, not taking his eyes off the other. “And you already know how to do the entry. You just have to stay calm and practice your dolphin kick. I know you can do the kick, I saw how good you were. If you start doing that the moment you’re in the water, you’ll reach the surface in no time.”

Makoto squinted at him, his eyes gleaming in the light.

“You sound so confident, Haru.. How can you have so much faith in me when I’m terrible at everything?”

“Because you’re not terrible. You just think you are, so stop that.”

Makoto let out a weak chuckle that pulled Haruka’s heart into his throat.

“Trust yourself, dummy,” he said, his voice thick. “You’re doing fine.”

Makoto closed his eyes, his face hot and wet under that soft pastel sky.

* * *

 _Today is the last day._ The calendar said so.

Come morning, Haru and Makoto walked to school together. Makoto now seemed better rested, the change from the past few days so noticeable Haru could not help but keep glancing at him, marveling at the soft arches of Makoto’s smiles as they talked. They spent most of their morning peacefully, then ate lunch together in the schoolyard, unaware that not far away on the roof, an emergency strategy meeting had begun between Kou, Rei, and Nagisa.

“I did some calculations yesterday,” Kou told the boys as she placed her calendar in the middle for everyone to see. “At this rate, Makoto-senpai won’t be able to complete his training regimen before the prefectural tournament. I could reduce the numbers again, but if I do that, it won’t be enough to prepare him for competition…”

“What if we make him use a kickboard?” suggested Nagisa.

“Do the rules allow that?” asked Kou with her brow quirked.

“It might be an option. I don’t think the rules explicitly prohibit it,” said Rei with his chin cupped in thought. “And with a kickboard, Makoto-san wouldn’t need to dive, either… I will definitely look into this when I get home!”

“If Mako-chan enters, we can still swim individual events!” said Nagisa. “At least that’s something!”

“It’s a shame we have to give up on the medley relay, though,” sighed Rei. “If we could show Makoto-san how beautiful it is, especially the butterfly stroke as it touches the wall for the last exchange, maybe he would feel more inspired…”

Nagisa nodded with a moan, but Kou shot them a hard look as she grabbed her training calendar and clamped it shut.

“Why don’t you just show him then?” she said, giving them a miffed glare. They stared at her in confusion. Kou huffed. “Oh, seriously..! The three of you can swim breaststroke, butterfly and freestyle, can’t you? Just start with breaststroke and show Makoto-senpai how it’s all done!”

Rei and Nagisa exchanged surprised looks, then broke into hopeful smiles.

“That’s an excellent idea, Kou-san..!” said Rei, adjusting his glasses. “Hopefully it will be that spark of inspiration Makoto-san needs, and I’ve been longing to swim a relay again, even if it’s unofficial or somewhat incomplete.”

“Sounds fun!” cheered Nagisa. Kou flashed them a smile.

“Then it’s settled. Prepare your minds and muscles and let’s give Makoto-senpai a stunning three-style relay!” she cried as she raised her fist. A moment later, two more arms shot into the air in unison with a loud _Yaaaay!_

* * *

After school was over, they hurried down to the pool as fast as they could, but they had barely run down the length of it towards the changing area when its door swung open and out stepped Haruka, already clad in his jammers. A moment later, he was followed to their surprise by Makoto in his legskin. Rei, Nagisa, and Kou skidded to a halt and froze into a group of statues, the sound of their feet startling Makoto into jumping behind Haru like a frightened child. Haruka blinked, but let the other cling to his shoulders, mouthing something that Makoto acknowledged with a small, nervous nod.

The first-years remained where they were, watching Haru slowly break away from Makoto and step onto one of the starting blocks, diving into the water with the poise of a mermaid and slithering some ways away before he surfaced. He then seemed to beckon Makoto to do the same. The way he hesitated, they almost expected Makoto to shrink away or shake his head, but instead he took a deep breath and walked up to the starting block in the next lane, where he bent into position and tucked his chin to his chest. Everyone’s eyes fixed on him, breaths held and fists clenched. Makoto tensed. Kou’s hands clenched on Rei’s sleeve.

The three of them stood mesmerized as Makoto screwed his eyes shut and leaped forward with his arms held in front of him, bursting through the surface with enough force to glide straight onto the bottom. As soon as he slowed down below, his body started wriggling, hands clasped in prayer and legs kicking from his hips, and just seconds away from running out of air, his head broke through the surface with a loud gasp. He planted his feet and straightened, slapping his hands to his cheeks in what appeared to be relieved laughter, and when Haruka drifted over to him, Makoto took Haru’s extended hand and lay onto his back on the surface, pulling an arm backwards.. then the other… _and again…_

“Oh my god, is that—” blurted Kou. Nagisa started laughing.

“He’s swimming backstroke!” he cried, tugging on Rei’s arm in ecstasy. “ _Go, Mako-chaaan!_ ”

Kou started clapping and Nagisa turned to her with a glowing grin, the two of them giggling in joy until they saw Rei’s hand rise up to fix his glasses with shaking shoulders.

“Rei-chan..?” spoke Nagisa, his brow creased in worry.

“Rei-kun, are you alright?” asked Kou, their hands quickly settling on Rei’s back. Rei nodded and pressed his hand to his mouth, his neck jumping and eyes brimming with tears.

“He remembered the dolphin kick.. I’m so _proud..!_ ” croaked Rei and the others squeezed him in a bear hug, remaining together by the pool side to watch Makoto swim.

 

**_TO BE CONTINUED…_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 


	22. FrFr! - Nagisa and Rei's Heart to Heart!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A short bonus chapter in honor of Nagisa's birthday (again, not birthday-related), posted now to give Part 5 some space, and to properly conclude Episode 4. Most of this chapter takes place after Makoto's outburst, but before the shopping venture to ZERO in Part 4. Nitori's final entry at the end was written after the visit to ZERO.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Saturday, June 8, 2013.**

Once Nagisa and Rei said their goodbyes to Haru, Kou, and Ama-chan, they headed towards the train station in awkward silence. It was a painful, uncomfortable first. As long as they had known each other, there had always been lively chatter between them, which only seemed to stop when they fell asleep on one another, yet Rei was now walking tongue-tied, his eyes on the ground as though his world had fallen off its hinges. Nagisa endured the choked atmosphere for a while, seeking Rei’s eyes in vain, but when they just barely made it onto the train and Rei still wouldn’t speak, Nagisa clenched his fists and smacked them down on the schoolbag in his lap.

“Come on, Rei-chan..!” he whined, nudging his shoulder against the other’s arm. “Don’t be like this, you’re worrying me!”

“Nagisa-kun..?” spoke Rei, finally lifting his head to look at the other. He sighed and flashed Nagisa an awkward smile. “I’m sorry, Nagisa-kun. I just have a lot on my mind…”

“I know that, I do too, but it’s time you cheered up so we can move forward,” said Nagisa. Rei tensed, his hands balling into fists.

“How can I be cheerful when everyone is so upset?!” he snapped, unclenching a hand to shove his glasses back into place. “Makoto-san’s form is getting worse, and I am responsible as vice-captain, but I don’t know what to do! How would you feel in my place, Nagisa-kun? Could you laugh if you had hurt someone so much they ran away from you?”

“Rei-chan…” breathed Nagisa, his heart jolting. “I… I would be upset, too.”

“Well, there you have it,” replied Rei, but when he spoke next, his tone had softened a great deal. “I’m so sorry, Nagisa-kun. I just cannot help but feel terrible. I know I’m at fault, but I just don’t know what to do. It’s so frustrating… It makes me question if I’m capable at all.”

They both hung their heads at such a dismal conclusion, but Nagisa’s face scrunched up in a defiant pout.

“I’m sorry too… but I can’t let you go on feeling terrible anymore!” he said, his fists bonking on his schoolbag again. “Rei-chan! We’re getting off at the next stop, and you are coming with me!”

“Nagisa-kun..?” blurted Rei, eyes wide. “What are you planning to do?”

“I know what will solve our problem!” declared Nagisa, and once the train doors opened, he grabbed Rei’s wrist and dragged him off towards the nearest shopping mall.

* * *

“...Cake,” sighed Rei when Nagisa skidded to a halt in front of a vendor in the outer hall, all but pressing his face to the glass. “Your solution to our predicament is _cake._ ”

“Not just _any_ cake, Rei-chan!” said Nagisa as he straightened and dug out his wallet from his back pocket. “The juiciest, creamiest strawberry shortcake money can buy, and I’m going to treat you!”

“But, Nagisa-kun, sweets before dinner might spoil our appetites and besides, I thought you’ve already spent your allowance this week—”

“Tadaaa!” cried Nagisa in triumph as he fished out a one-thousand yen bill and flattened it with a few tugs, just inches from Rei’s face. “I still have the money from our bet!”

“So technically _I’m_ paying for the cake…” muttered Rei with narrowed eyes.

“Stop splitting hairs, Rei-chan, and Pick. Your. Cake!” chirped Nagisa, grinning widely as Rei caved in and bent down to survey the trays. He soon settled on an innocent-looking cherry tart, then looked around for seats. There was no place to sit in the narrow corridor, but they managed to find a small table further up, so they rushed over to claim it for themselves. Nagisa was practically salivating by then, and took a large, moaning bite of his shortcake. Rei stared at him indignantly before picking up the cherry tart, which he began to carefully nibble around the edges.

He had never fancied sweets, certainly not in comparison to Nagisa, but the cherry tart was gone in a matter of minutes, and its gentle sourness sorely missed.

“Do you feel better, Rei-chan?” asked Nagisa over his final strawberry, which he had carefully licked clean to save it for last.

“I’m not sure, Nagisa-kun..” sighed Rei, his gaze falling to the table. “I can’t stop thinking about Makoto-san. I don’t understand him and it makes me so frustrated.”

He paused, eyes drifting towards Nagisa. “I still can’t believe he hurt your hands.”

Nagisa tensed, his empty hand clenching into a fist.

“Rei-chan, you need to stop dwelling on that!” he scolded. “It was an accident, you _know_ Mako-chan isn’t like that, even Haru-chan said so! And my hand is _fine!_ Here,” said Nagisa, shoving the strawberry in his mouth and then giving his fingers a cleaning suckle before he held out his hand. “Squeeze it and see for yourself!”

Nagisa’s small fingers glistened with fresh saliva, but after some repulsed hesitation, Rei reached out and cupped his hand to give it a light squeeze.

No tension. No more flinching.

“See? It’s fine now,” repeated Nagisa, but Rei furrowed his brow.

“That’s not the point, Nagisa-kun.. How would you have felt if it had been _my hand?_ ”

Nagisa blinked.

“Rei-chan…” he breathed, his hand fluttering slightly in the other’s hold. “I would have been worried, but you can’t hold this against Mako-chan forever! If you do, you will never be friends and you’ll both be miserable! _I don’t want that!_ ” he cried as he locked Rei into a pleading stare. Rei’s fingers tensed and relaxed over Nagisa’s hand. He sighed.

“I suppose you are right, Nagisa-kun. I was angry about it, but I don’t want to hold Makoto-san in contempt… and I know I must accommodate him and trust him if you trust him, and if Haruka-senpai thinks he really is the fourth member we need. But, I just—”

“But nothing, Rei-chan,” said Nagisa, his tone calm and collected like it rarely ever was. “Mako-chan must be so scared by now. He’s trying really hard, you know he is, but it’s not working so everyone is upset, even Haru-chan. But now we have a chance to make it better and show Mako-chan that we believe in him, and tomorrow, poor Mako-chan will need you the most!”

“Me..?” stared Rei. Nagisa nodded, his free hand slapping over Rei’s to clasp them tightly.

“Yes, you, Rei-chan! You are the only one who knows all the theories that can help Mako-chan pick the best swimsuit! You are the expert, so you must take him under your wing and guide him so he can be a beautiful, awesome backstroke swimmer! If anyone can help Mako-chan now, it’s you! Our strong, capable vice-captain Rei-chan!”

“Nagisa-kun…” breathed Rei, his hands twitching instinctively below. Nagisa paused and lifted his own hand to press Rei’s glasses back with a finger. He then adjusted them slightly till they were level. Rei gave a small nod in thanks. “You are absolutely right... I have been so thoughtless..! Makoto-san does need an expert’s guidance and I shouldn’t have pushed a beginner as hard as I did. I was upset too, but I should have put my feelings aside… and from now on, I will! Tomorrow, I will not leave Makoto-san’s side until we find him the perfect swimsuit! You can mark my words, Nagisa-kun. I shall do everything I can, and before our time is up, I will transform Makoto-san into the beautiful orca he was always meant to be! _Gyaaa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-haaa!_ ”

“That’s the spirit, Rei-chan!” said Nagisa with a grin, their bundled hands conveniently forgotten as Rei guffawed with raw abandon.

* * *

That night, Aiichiro pulled the blanket over his head to muffle the glow of the miniature flashlight so he could update his diary in secret.

_June 8. I saw Senpai’s former teammates today. They ate cake and held hands. I didn’t know they were dating. I wonder if Senpai knows? I wish Matsuoka-senpai liked sweets at all, then maybe we could go out for cake sometime….._

The next day, he penned another.

_June 9. Today we went to ZERO to buy new swim suits. Matsuoka-senpai asked for my opinion a lot! I did my best to tell Senpai he looked great!! Turns out the Iwatobi Swim Club was there, too! I asked the Captain and he said the fourth member’s name was Tachibana Makoto. The Captain also told me he had a special announcement for the swim team on Monday. Something about travelling?! I hope Senpai isn’t going away anywhere!!!_


	23. EPISODE 5: Trial in Open Water! - Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rei had to pinch himself for fear he was dreaming, but it was no illusion. Although Makoto was still a few steps shy of a competitively acceptable backstroke, he had finally learned how to swim, kick, and dive. More importantly, he now seemed to be at greater ease in the water than ever before. Whether that stemmed from whatever Haruka might have said to him yesterday, his successful display in front of his peers, or the fact that Haru remained by his side while he demonstrated his backstroke remained to be seen, but it was progress neither of them dared hope for, and were more than ready to foster in their own special ways. Kou decided to take the first step, letting go of Nagisa and Rei to fetch the calendar still hung on the railing, holding it high as she ceremoniously tore down the last page of the once dreaded seven-day calendar. She was busy shredding the paper even as Haruka and Makoto reached the front of the pool and climbed out, but once Makoto stepped away from the pool, Kou hurried over and showered him in calendar confetti.

“You did it, Makoto-senpai!” she cheered as she gave the stunned boy a round of applause. “You have learned backstroke within a week!”

“You’re amazing! I love you, Mako-chan!” cried Nagisa, who immediately jumped Makoto in a clingy bear hug. Nagisa nudged his cheek against Makoto’s, giving Haruka a grin and a thumbs up over the other’s shoulder. Haru stared back looking more miffed than happy, then turned his head with flushed cheeks. Rei, however, was glowing with pride, and once he discerned that Makoto was not going to topple over from the added weight, Rei moved closer to congratulate him on his success.

“You have completed your training, Makoto-san!” he said in a warm, earnest tone. “You are now a full-fledged swimmer, and we are all very proud of you! How do you feel?”

Makoto scratched the back of his head, one arm now holding onto Nagisa not to drop him.

“I hardly know what to say,” he said with a sheepish grin. “Thank you, everyone. I couldn’t have done it without you…” he added, turning his head as much as Nagisa’s proximity allowed to glance at Haru. Their eyes met. A flutter stirred in Haruka’s stomach.

“That’s our Mako-chan!” cooed Nagisa as he gave Makoto a full-body squeeze. “Now that you can swim, we will definitely get to go to prefecturals! We might even swim a relay!”

Makoto’s smile wavered in mild panic and Rei’s hands shot up at once in an apologetic wave.

“Now, now, Nagisa-kun, let’s not overwhelm Makoto-san,” he said with light, nervous laughter. “We first have to make sure he learns everything he needs to compete in a safe and efficient manner!”

“Aw, come on… I thought we all wanted to swim a relay,” moaned Nagisa. Haruka frowned.

“I only swim free,” he said out loud, turning away from the others to dive back inside. That was when Nagisa finally disentangled himself from Makoto to make a dash for the starting block.

“Waaah, Haru-chan, wait a minute! You still haven’t told us what that means!”

“It means Haruka-senpai is avoiding the issue, Nagisa-kun,” replied Rei with a sharp upward nudge of his glasses. “But no matter,” he continued in a determined tone, turning right back to Makoto. “Makoto-san, congratulations again on learning the backstroke, and to show my utmost support, I shall learn how to do the backstroke entry so that you may observe it during practice!”

“Rei-chan…!” breathed Nagisa in awe, scampering back to the two of them not to be left out of the fun. “In that case, I’ll help Mako-chan practice diving!”

“I’ll make a new spreadsheet to track the next stage of his training!” offered Kou, all of them now looking to Makoto with anticipation. There was a splash behind them as Haruka reached the wall beneath the starting block and stopped to catch his breath. Makoto turned to him instinctively, stepping away from the others without a satisfactory reply. They stared at him with their brows quirked in miffed confusion, but a moment later, Makoto extended his hand towards Haruka, and all mixed feelings were dispersed.

“Haru,” Makoto called out to his friend, who stared back in surprise, his eyes drifting downwards as his hand reached up and grasped Makoto’s. The other pulled him up and shifted to the side, as if making room for Haru in the circle he had momentarily left. Nagisa cracked a grin.

“Well, Haru-chan?” he asked cheerfully. Haruka gave him a look.

“Well what?”

“What are _you_ gonna do for Mako-chan?”

“Huh..?”

“We all decided what we’re gonna do to help Mako-chan!” explained Nagisa. “Rei-chan is going to teach him the entry, Kou-chan is making him a new spreadsheet, and I will help him practice diving, so what about you, Haru-chan?”

“Oh…”

Haru’s eyes fell on the ground for a moment before he lifted his head to look at Makoto.

“I will teach you the turn, and the flutter kick. And help you practice your stroke.”

“I think I’ll also help Makoto-san practice his dolphin kick,” said Rei all of a sudden. “In retrospect, we should have practiced it upside down first to suit the backstroke entry, but now I shall correct my mistake and help him become proficient both ways!”

“Oh, oh! Maybe I could help him practice breaststroke again!” chimed in Nagisa. “What do you say, Mako-chan?” he turned to Makoto as all eyes fixed on him again.

“Eh?!” blurted Makoto, then broke into a short, anxious laugh. “I.. I think it might be better to just focus on backstroke for now, but thank you, Nagisa,” he said at last with a smile that seemed to placate Nagisa, a smile that soon included all of them. “Thank you, everyone. I promise I’ll do my best not to let you down.”

“That’s the spirit, Makoto-san!” said Rei as he fixed his glasses. “I think we have everything covered now, and that means—”

“Time to change and get ready for practice!” cheered Nagisa, who gave Rei a playful whap on his lower back as he ran past him. “Last one to get changed is a rotten egg!”

“H-Hold up, Nagisa-kun! You didn’t tell me this would be a race!” cried Rei, chasing after Nagisa not to become something as disgraceful as a rotten egg.

His frantic dash coaxed a fond chuckle out of Makoto. A delightful sound it was to all who heard it, but once his laughter had become too warm and his smiles too bright, Haruka turned away from him and dove back into the safety of cold water.

* * *

The rest of the week was spent fulfilling the promises they had so whole-heartedly made to one another. Once he studied up on theory, Rei began practicing his backstroke entry the very next day, leaving Makoto in the care of Haruka and Nagisa so they could guide him through the motions of the turn, correct his backstroke form, and supervise his diving. With some difficulty, they managed to count how many strokes it took from the five-meter line to the wall, and while Makoto still hesitated and slowed down near the turn, Haru and Nagisa grabbed him at the turning point, folding him around like a human pretzel. In another few days, Makoto managed to tumble himself, and by the time Saturday rolled around, Rei was ready to show him the backstroke entry, which always sent him right to the bottom of the pool, just as Nagisa had predicted. Makoto fared a little better at least. Once Rei started working on his upside-down dolphin kick, his final backstroke entry brought him to the surface in one large breath.

Incidentally, that wasn’t the only novelty Saturday brought to the team. As Nagisa finally had permission to place the swim club’s order on Tuesday, Rei received a special delivery on Saturday afternoon, which he promised to bring to practice on Sunday, and if that wasn’t enough, Kou told them she would take her countdown calendar to the next level, too. It started precisely sixty days before the prefectural tournament, on the very day she told Makoto he had to learn backstroke within a week, and though she had been content thus far to paint the pages in advance and place them in the changing room, she decided this was no longer enough. Come Sunday, she appeared early for practice in a white, red, and gray hakama, carrying a case full of writing supplies, and once the boys changed into swimsuits, they gathered in a row behind her as she ceremoniously knelt down and painted the next page with a few dynamic strokes of her brush. When she was done, the white page screamed in large black letters, _27 Days Until the Prefectural Tournament!_

“Is this why we had to wait?” moaned Nagisa.

“Can you not do this, Kou-san?” asked Rei, his arms defensively folded.

“Pressure is what pushes people to the next level,” was Kou’s stern reply.

“Pressure can also ruin some people,” said Haruka, not looking at anyone in particular.

“Are you talking about Rei-chan?” asked Nagisa at once. Rei let out an indignant shriek.

“I’m not that weak, Nagisa-kun!”

“Remember how you were though, back when we were—”

“ _We don’t talk about that!_ ”

Makoto smothered a chuckle, thoroughly glad he wasn’t singled out as someone who might be ruined by pressure, but looking at Kou and her calendar, he finally found himself asking without much thought,

“But why is Kou-chan wearing a hakama?”

Kou shot him a look and rose from her place, brandishing her paint brush as if it were a sword. The fact that they seemed unfazed by her attempt at motivating them was bad enough, but to question the details of her countdown ceremony was tantamount to treason.

“ _Stop talking and start practicing!_ ” she cried, all but chasing them out of the changing area, Makoto sprinting at the front in sheer terror of their formidable manager. “Get going!!”

 _Honestly…_ she thought to herself as she glared after them, but the next moment, a gust of wind that had been rustling the branches of cherry trees nearby finally found its way inside the changing room and blew her calendar across the floor. Kou let out a cry of anguish, rushing to gather the pages she had painstakingly written and stacked over the last twelve days.

“What a pain…” she moaned as she fumbled around to pick them up, only to pinch up the corner of something that felt nothing like the large white sheets she had brought with her. Not only was it thicker and felt rough and tattered to her fingers, but most of it was covered by the rug none of them had bothered to move during cleaning, as though it had been left there well before their time. “Huh? What’s this..?”

She pulled it out carefully and gave it a gentle dusting. In the wake of her fingers, a lofty string of words appeared on the sepia cover. She gasped.

“ _This is—!_ ”

* * *

Outside, the boys decided to delay practice just a little while longer, to finally examine the mysterious package Rei had brought in with him. With some difficulty and liberal use of Nagisa’s teeth and nails, they pried it open, finding a stack of brand new custom-ordered Iwatobi Swim Club tracksuits. Nagisa laughed in delight and dug out his own t-shirt, pulling it on for everyone to see.

“What do you think?” he asked the others as he turned around. Rei reached out and pinched up a fold on Nagisa’s back.

“First of all, it’s bright yellow…”

“A happy color that will make us look distinguished!”

“And what is this thing on the back..?”

“Iwatobi-chan, of course, a super secret version!” came the explanation. “Since you were against putting Iwatobi-chan on our tracksuits, I asked the company to put him on our t-shits instead!” grinned Nagisa. Rei frowned and the fabric slipped from his fingers.

“Iwatobi-chan super secret version..” he muttered in disdain.

“Drawn by Haru-chan himself!” added Nagisa. “Good work, Haru-chan!”

“Don’t mention it,” replied Haruka with a shrug. Makoto broke into a soft smile, while Rei sighed in defeat. There was nothing to do about Iwatobi-chan, but all the more to do in the swim club, now that the prefecturals were but twenty-seven days away.

“Let us get started,” he said, clearing his throat until everyone gathered in front of him, leaving the track suits alone for now. “Before we begin our warm up, I suggest we review the events we’ll be entering at prefecturals so that we may practice accordingly,” continued Rei, his eyes soon fixed on the captain. “Haruka-senpai?”

Haru stared at him, then turned his head.

“I only swim free,” he said. Rei gave him a look.

“I think that is abundantly clear for everyone present, Haruka-senpai, but _which_ freestyle events will you be entering?”

Haru glared at him. As though the words were being pulled out of him with forceps, he muttered, _One-hundred meter freestyle_ under his breath.

“One-hundred meter only? You should consider the two-hundred meter as well, Haruka-senpai,” suggested Rei, but Haruka stubbornly fixed his eyes on the pool and offered no comment. Rei waited a moment, then slapped his hands on his hips. “Very well! _I_ shall be entering the one-hundred meter and two-hundred meter butterfly! Nagisa-kun?”

“I’m swimming breast,” replied Nagisa with a smile. “I’m thinking about the one-hundred meter and two-hundred meter.”

“Excellent choice! And last but not least, Makoto-san, which events will you be entering?”

Makoto had been waiting for his turn with no small amount of uneasiness, his hand once again wringing his wrist.

“If I enter, I should probably swim backstroke,” he said quietly. Rei smiled.

“I suppose the one-hundred and two-hundred meters, Makoto-san?”

“Uh… yeah, that’s fine.”

“Excellent, _excellent!_ ” replied Rei, but prompted by the slight discomfort on Makoto’s face, he continued to say, “Don’t worry, Makoto-san, by the time the prefectural tournament begins, you will have had plenty of practice to prepare you for competition!”

“We’ll get you in top shape, Mako-chan!” promised Nagisa, lifting his arms to show his modest biceps to Makoto. Rei chuckled.

“Not that your physical condition isn’t already enviable, Makoto-san…” he said with tinted cheeks. Haru gave him a sharp look. “But practice and training will make you stronger yet, and I’m sure you will do very well!”

“What if I don’t place, though?” asked Makoto. The slight quiver of his voice drew Haruka’s gaze, who furrowed his brow. Rei blinked.

“Consider the prefecturals a simple test, Makoto-san,” he said at last with a nervous smile. “No matter where you place, it will show you how much you have learned and improved within a short time.”

“Yeah, don’t worry so much, Mako-chan!” said Nagisa with a nod. “You’ll be fine!”

“Just do your best, Makoto,” said Haruka, their eyes meeting for a long moment that finally brought the semblance of a smile to Makoto’s face.

“Alright, that takes care of our line-up for individual events,” said Rei, his arms folding contentedly over his chest. “That leaves the subject of the medley relay.”

As if on cue, both Rei and Nagisa fixed their eyes on Haru, who turned his head sharply. Rei tapped his foot.

“As I said, this leaves the subject of the _medley_ —” he repeated himself, but as soon as he began, Haruka took a few hurried steps towards the pool and dove in with a loud splash. Rei ran after him and slammed his hands on the starting block, his cheeks crimson. “ _As vice-captain I must insist you come back here at once!_ **_You can’t avoid the subject forever, Haruka-senpai!!_** ”

Haru showed no signs of wishing to return any time soon, leaving Rei to howl in agony and Nagisa to placate him with a few soothing pats of his shoulder. Makoto stood in silence behind them, his eyes fixed on Haruka’s graceful silhouette beneath the surface.

“If Haru is reluctant to swim relays,” he risked in a tentative tone, “perhaps we could make that decision later and just practice as though we were training for a relay.. or does relay require special training?”

“Not really,” said Nagisa, who flashed Makoto a smile. “You would go first, Mako-chan, so you don’t have to do anything extra, and we could always practice our exchanges whenever we want, Rei-chan!”

Rei cupped his chin in thought, and after a moment’s pause, he fixed his glasses.

“That is true… Very well, motion accepted,” he replied. Makoto sighed in relief as Rei walked to the edge of the pool and shouted, “Decision postponed indefinitely! You can come out of the pool now, Haruka-senpai…!”

After another turn, Haruka rejoined them, Makoto once again reaching out his hand for him to take and Haru grabbing it with flushed cheeks. Nagisa gave him a wink. Haru turned his head indignantly.

“Now that the matter has been resolved for the present, thanks to Makoto-san,” said Rei, at which Makoto broke into a sheepish smile and Haruka glanced back at him a little too quickly, “there is just one more thing to keep in mind. It has been a while since any of us competed, which means stamina may be an issue both in individual events and the medley relay that we may or may not participate in.” He paused to give Haruka a narrow-eyed look. Haru’s poker face remained impenetrable. “For this reason, I recommend swimming short distances, and training specifically to increase stamina—”

“You won’t believe this! I just found something amazing!” cried Kou as she tore out of the changing area and ran towards them, waving what appeared to be a sad salad of old papers. “Look at this!”

In her hands was a booklet, its wrinkled cover faded to dull sepia except for the screaming crimson of flames in the middle, informing them of…

“…The Iwatobi High School Swim Club Summer Training Camp from Hell on a Deserted Island..?!” Rei read out loud, fixing his glasses indignantly at the last part.

“ _Hell?_ ” echoed Makoto, shooting Haru a worried look that the other acknowledged with a shrug.

“Deserted island…?” breathed Nagisa, his eyes twinkling with delight. “Sounds fun!”

“This took place several years ago, when Iwatobi High School still had a swim club!” Kou informed them, having perused the booklet at length. Rei folded his arms.

“What’s your point, Kou-san?” he said, eyes narrowed and posture tense, and since Rei had spoken in his stead, Haruka decided to leave their group again, crouching down to the pool. He dipped his hand in the water as a subtle indicator that he would rather swim than discuss some age-old relic. Makoto shook his head fondly at him.

“My point is we should steal their training regimen and hold a summer training camp on a deserted island!” replied Kou, one hand soaring into the air with her finger pointing to the sky. “To prepare for prefecturals!”

“Too much effort,” spoke Haruka at last. Kou turned sharply to wag a finger at him.

“This is no time for complaining! Just look at the training regimen they used!” she said, turning a few withered pages to show them a hand-drawn map of three small islands connected by large arrows. “They swam long distances in the ocean from one deserted island to the next! Don’t you think this training would be perfect for building stamina?”

“The ocean…” mumbled Makoto, his voice barely a whisper yet Haruka lifted his head, his heart humming with a strange, nervous flutter.

“That’s right, the ocean!” replied Kou, beaming brightly at the others. “If it was good enough for our once illustrious swim club, we should participate in the same training regimen they used to honor their memory!”

“Our swim club was illustrious…?” asked Nagisa, his brow quirked. Kou nodded.

“Yup! Look what I found,” she said as she revealed a larger piece of paper tucked behind her booklet. It was a rundown of tournament results from the year the former swim club tested its regimen.

“Sixth place at the Iwatobi Junior Tournament..” read Rei. “ _Weak,_ ” he and Nagisa said in chorus. Kou glared at them.

“That’s not the point! Right now, the Iwatobi Swim Club needs stamina, and summer is the perfect time to hold a training camp! In the ocean! On deserted islands!”

“Wait, I don’t see how deserted islands are relevant here,” muttered Rei. Nagisa stared at him.

“But it’s more exciting when you add deserted islands,” he said. Kou immediately nodded with a grin.

“I know, right? So let’s hold a training camp!” she said, quickly turning to Haruka, on whom all eyes were now fixed with anticipation except Makoto’s. He stood in the back with his hands firmly clasped together, and tall though he was, the others towered above Haru so eagerly that they completely blocked Makoto from his sight. “What is your decision, Haruka-senpai?”

“Why do I have to decide?”

“Because _you_ are the captain, Haruka-senpai!” harped Rei. Haru turned his head with a shrug.

“Whatever. Do what you want,” he ended up saying, if only because the discussion was detaining him from swimming to his heart’s content, and saying no would have only invited trouble. His words did nothing to lessen the strange hum in his chest, but after a moment’s consideration, he calmed himself with the thought that the club wouldn’t be able to afford a training camp of such magnitude, no matter how much they wanted it. They seemed to have their hearts set on it, so much so that Nagisa and Kou now turned to Rei with the same burning anticipation they had shown to Haruka.

“Vice-captain?!” pressed Kou as they locked Rei into a stare. Rei let out a yelp, but soon adjusted his glasses with a sigh.

“Well, I suppose it might be a good idea to hold a training camp to build stamina… but must we do it on a deserted—”

“Then it’s settled!” cried Kou in triumph, her fist pumping into the air. “Hurray for our captain and vice-captain!”

“This is gonna be so much fun!” cried Nagisa. “Three cheers for Haru-chan! Three cheers for Rei-chan! And for Kou-chan, our super manager!”

Now that he was being celebrated as their magnanimous leader, Rei’s expression smoothed out in a contented smirk, as though he had arranged everything himself.

“Yes, I believe it will be a rewarding experience,” he said out loud, all his irritation about deserted islands and nonsense thoroughly suppressed.

“Now all we have to do is ask Ama-chan’s permission on Monday! Maybe we’ll finally get some funding, too!” said Nagisa.

“Yippie!”

“Yes, well, I believe we should start our warm-ups now,” said Rei. “Makoto-san, if you please!”

“Oh.. coming,” replied Makoto, his voice a little too quiet, but largely unnoticed by his excited peers, who took his reserved expression for no more than beginner’s nerves and assured him over and over again that a training camp in the ocean on deserted islands would be the very thing they all needed. Makoto did his best to nod and even smile, but whenever attention turned away from him, Haru could not help but notice how quickly Makoto’s smiles peeled away. Was he anxious about swimming large distances? Or was it the idea that he would be competing to place in prefecturals so they could all advance? Haru wasn’t sure, but once again, there was something not quite right about Makoto.

* * *

**_Seven days earlier…_ **

“Attention, everyone! Listen to me like _your lives depended on it!_ ” bellowed Mikoshiba Seijuurou to several rows of tense, trembling swimmers as their advisor, Sugimoto-sensei approached them, soon stopping beside the captain. Aiichiro stood next to Rin in the very first row, his hands idly wringing his swim cap. “Our advisor has some wonderful news for you!”

“Thank you, Mikoshiba-kun,” said Sugimoto, flashing a small smile at the Samezuka swim club. “Our request to reward the efforts of the Samezuka swim club with a field trip has been accepted, and all arrangements settled. For your final week in June, the swim club will be attending a seven-day training camp at an island resort!”

“Yes, sir!” cried the united swim club, Aiichiro hardly daring to breathe the words.

“We are currently preparing a leaflet with every important detail. For now, carry on with practice,” said Sugimoto-sensei with a nod, and once every student returned it with a reverent bow, their advisor retired so the captain could assume control once more.

“Alright, men! Get in line and train hard!” he shouted, and his recruits hurried to the starting blocks in droves, all of them except Nitori Aiichiro.

“Huh? What’s wrong, Nitori?” asked Seijuurou. Aiichiro’s hands hardened on his cap.

“Captain Mikoshiba..” he began, unable to look his superior in the eye. “When Sugimoto-sensei talked of the swim club, I suppose.. he must have meant the _top_ swimmers of the club, right?”

Seijuurou quirked his brow.

“What are you getting at?”

“That, I uh, I don’t suppose swim club members with slower times are allowed to.. to..” stammered Aiichiro. For one moment, he lifted his head just barely to glance at Rin in the distance, and that was the moment when Mikoshiba finally understood. His hand came slamming down on Nitori’s thin shoulder with a grin, who let out a pained yelp.

“Sugimoto-sensei meant the entire swim club, of course,” said Seijuurou, giving Nitori a hard squeeze for good measure. “Besides, swimmers with slower times need this more than anybody! You’re not thinking of getting out of training, _are you, Nitori?!_ ” he boomed in a teasing tone, jabbing Nitori’s chest a few times with a finger. Aiichiro colored crimson.

“O-Of course not!”

“Then pack your swimsuits in two weeks! And practice hard in the meantime!” replied Seijuurou, then lowered his voice slyly to add, “Oh, by the way, are you willing to share a room with Matsuoka, or do I need to pair him up with someone else..?”

“Eh?! I will gladly have Matsuoka-senpai!” cried Aiichiro at once. Rin shot him a glare from afar, not quite able to discern the subject of their discourse, but fine-tuned enough to catch his own name in conversation. Nitori noticed and colored to the tips of his ears. Seijuurou laughed as he gave him a pat so hard Aiichiro toppled forward.

“That’s the spirit! Now get in line and work on your times!”

“ _Yes, sir!_ ” whined Aiichiro, his shoulders still tingling as he scurried off to join his morose senpai. Rin gave him a glare when he arrived.

“What was that about?” he asked in a low hiss. Aiichiro colored.

“Nothing..! Well, the captain said we would be sharing a room, Matsuoka-senpai.”

“Oh..” Rin’s face relaxed, if only slightly. “Nitori.”

“Y-Yes..?” mumbled Aiichiro, his cheeks still flushed. Rin’s eyes drifted way.

“Will you time me?”

Aiichiro finally broke into a smile that brought even more color to his face.

“Of course!”


	24. EPISODE 5: Trial in Open Water! - Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once practice was over on Sunday, Makoto and Haruka walked home in silence, but despite Haruka’s earlier premonitions, Makoto’s taciturnity seemed nothing like the oppressive anxiety of earlier days. After several hours of rigorous swimming, the tired look on his face and the way his shoulders slouched under the duffel bag were more than justified, so Haruka was all too glad to chalk up his friend’s disposition to fatigue and nothing more. Whenever he prompted Makoto, the other’s voice rang calm and mellow, and when Haruka suggested that Nagisa and Kou’s ambitious plans would probably come to nothing, Makoto nodded with a small smile. Once he cocked his head to the side, Haruka’s features relaxed, and Makoto’s small smile turned to one of relief. As long as Haru suspected nothing, things would be alright… and if Makoto could just fake it long enough to make it, he would be alright, too.

The next morning, Makoto seemed well-rested and lively, just as Haruka hoped he would be, and once lunch time arrived, he awaited the arrival of the first-years with sufficiently happy looks. Nagisa and Kou were still ecstatic about their plan, so the swim club made a bee-line for the Faculty Office, but just as Haruka had predicted, Amakata-sensei proved completely unmoved by their request for an impromptu summer vacation.

“The club doesn’t have money for that,” she told them flatly, but Nagisa persevered.

“Then we could ask our generous advisor to pay for it!” he said as he threw his hands in the air. Ama-chan gave him a glare.

“I’m not that generous!” she snapped, her arms tightly folded together. Nagisa lowered his arms. “Besides, people only get that lucky in TV shows and manga. The Irish playwright George Bernard Shaw said it best,” continued Amakata Miho, raising a finger for emphasis. “The book that has had the most influence on my life… is my checkbook.”

Everyone stared at her unimpressed, but their advisor remained immovable. No amount of begging could persuade her to provide funds for six people together, and that was final.

* * *

“I can’t believe she’d turn us down like that,” moaned Nagisa once school was over and the five of them gathered in front of the gate.

“I can’t believe you were surprised by that,” said Rei as he gave his glasses a stern push. Nagisa let out a whine.

“But I really want to go to a deserted island with everyone! The disappointment is _killing_ me, _Rei-chaaan!_ ” he cried as he nudged his head against Rei’s arm.

“And just what am I supposed to do about it, Nagisa-kun?!” cried Rei indignantly with Nagisa relentlessly burrowing against him. Makoto chuckled.

“If you want to cheer up a little,” he began in a quiet voice, “why don’t we go down to the convenience store and get something sweet? That cheers me up sometimes.”

Haruka stole a glance at him, but Makoto appeared all smiles, and the moment he finished, Nagisa stopped nudging his head against Rei’s arm, now looking to Makoto with twinkling eyes.

“Some ice cream would be nice!” he said longingly, turning his head to Kou, who nodded just as eagerly. Rei seemed less convinced, but Nagisa had since latched onto his wrist to make sure he tagged along. “Let’s gooo!”

Once Nagisa started dragging him, Rei’s resistance was broken, and though Haruka was just as indifferent to the idea of a sweet treat as Rei, the way Makoto’s face lit up in triumph was enough incentive to at least escort his friends to the Family Store down the street, where students frequently stopped on the way home from school. The first-years were in the lead and soon disappeared inside, Rei chiding Nagisa to slow down and stop tugging his arm every step of the way. Makoto and Haruka were bringing up the rear at a more casual pace, but when Haru stopped in front of the store, the sudden change from two pairs of footsteps to one halted Makoto as well. He turned back to his friend with a curious look.

“Are you coming in, Haru?” he asked in a hopeful tone. Haruka tensed.

“It’s fine. I’ll wait outside,” he said, having never been in the habit of buying treats for himself, and hardly ever carrying money unless he was going shopping. Makoto quirked a brow, but soon flashed him a gentle smile.

“Shall I get you anything?” he asked, obviously ready to oblige him. Haru sighed.

“Anything you get is fine,” he said at last in a low voice. Makoto nodded with a grin.

“I’ll be back in a minute!”

* * *

Once the first-years made their way outside and gathered in front of the store to wait for Makoto, Nagisa started nibbling his chocolate coated ice cream, Kou fiddled with the wrap of a cola popsicle, and Rei pierced a straw in his low-calorie fruit drink, having refused to the bitter end to buy something as needlessly fattening and indulgent as ice cream. Makoto appeared a few minutes later, holding what appeared to be a large ice cream sandwich, but when he reached Haru’s side, he tore off the wrapper to reveal a double soda popsicle. He proceeded to snap it in two, his face twitching into an embarrassed frown as the halves came away uneven, but after a moment’s struggle to compose himself, he offered the larger half to Haruka with tinted cheeks. Haru stared at him in awkward silence. Of all the things he expected, it certainly wasn’t _this._

“Is this okay?” asked Makoto, his face coloring a little more. “I hope you don’t hate this flavor…”

“Oh.. no, it’s fine,” mumbled Haru as he took his half with burning ears, taking a small bite of the top to cut off further conversation. Makoto smiled in relief and began sucking on his own popsicle and Haruka shot an alarmed glance at Nagisa, but no obnoxious grins came his way, as Nagisa had already turned back to Rei and Kou.

“This is nice..!” he sighed as he took a bite of the soft vanilla ice cream he finally managed to free of its fragile chocolate shell. “But I still want to go on a training camp… If the school won’t pay for it, maybe we could try and pay for it ourselves!”

“I can’t afford it,” said Rei immediately. “We had to pay for the tracksuits ourselves as it is, and I’ve just bought a new swimsuit.”

“I also bought one,” said Haruka.

“Same here,” joined Nagisa. Kou glared at them.

“Makoto-senpai needed a swimsuit, but the rest of you didn’t need to buy one! Especially not _you_ , Haruka-senpai,” she said as she turned her head to give the captain a look of disapproval. “All your swimsuits look the same.”

When she first turned to him, Haru merely looked confused, but by the time Kou finished, Haruka turned his head sharply with an annoyed look.

“They fit differently,” he said in a childish pout. Makoto suppressed a chuckle.

“We could all find part-time jobs!” suggested Nagisa. Rei shook his head.

“It’s too late for that.”

“Isn’t there any way we could do it for free?”

“We would need free transportation and free accommodation, Nagisa-kun, and let’s face it, we have neither.”

Makoto blinked in thought. Further ahead, Kou sighed with drooping shoulders.

“It looks like this plan’s a bust, then…” she said in a small voice. She and Nagisa hung their heads, their small forms shrinking so much in defeat they reminded Makoto of Ren and Ran whenever their little hearts were broken. Nagisa and Kou were only a year below, yet felt so young and helpless in their moment of defeat Makoto could not help but hang his head too, keenly conscious that their wish was completely out of their reach… out of theirs, but not _his_. His every urge protested the idea, but the moment Rei had spoken, Makoto knew there was an answer to at least one part of the problem, and if the hopes and dreams of his friends depended on it, the answer could not be denied.

“Wait,” he called to them, his tone more serious than usual. Kou and Nagisa stopped to turn back wide-eyed. Rei paused. Haruka quirked his brow.

“Huh? What is it, Mako-chan?”

Makoto’s lips twitched, but his face quickly smoothed out in calm determination.

“I think I can help with accommodation. If that is taken care of, all we’d need to worry about is how to get to the island, right?”

Nagisa and Kou gasped, then beamed at him like it was the greatest thing they had ever head.

“Are you serious?! _Awesome!_ ” cried Nagisa. “Hooray for Mako-chan!”

“I knew we could count on Makoto-senpai!”

Nagisa and Kou were jumping with joy while Makoto was practically glowing under their praise, but Haruka glared at them with in an irritated itch, the growing suspicion that this was just another calm before the storm, just like Makoto’s euphoria upon officially joining the swim club that fateful Friday back in May. Makoto suggested he could provide for five to six people if they accepted his offer, but it seemed too much, too magnanimous. Would it be another case of sacrificing himself for the sake of others? Haruka hoped it would not, yet his jaw clenched in vexation, and he took a larger bite of his popsicle before he might open his mouth to argue. After all, Makoto looked so happy…

“If you want, you can come over to my house, and I’ll ask my parents right now if we can have the camping equipment for ourselves,” continued Makoto.

“Camping equipment..?” echoed Rei. Makoto flashed him a hapless smile.

“Our family always goes camping during the summer.”

“So your idea is literally camping on the beach…?” mumbled Kou. Her apparent discomfort caused Makoto’s self-confidence to fade along with his smiles.

“Only if everyone agrees to it,” he said quietly, his eyes lowered to the ground. “I wouldn’t want to force it on anyone..”

“Do you have tents, then?” asked Nagisa in obvious excitement. Makoto nodded.

“Yeah, two tents,” he said, lifting his head just enough to look at the other.

“I’m in! Next stop, Mako-chan’s house!” cried Nagisa and dashed forward, only to skid to a halt a few meters away. “Uh, where _do_ you live, Mako-chan?”

Makoto laughed despite himself. Haru tensed.

“This way,” his friend said with a more earnest grin as he turned around. With the others falling into step behind him, Haru followed suit as well, catching up to them with a few hurried steps until he fell into stride by Makoto’s side.

* * *

It didn’t take long for the first-years to realize that the path to Makoto’s house felt remarkably familiar. Their eyes soon fixed on Makoto’s back in confused anticipation, half-expecting him to lead them straight to Haruka’s house for some mischievous reason of his own. None of them pegged him to live anywhere near their friend’s house, so their astonishment was all the greater when Makoto turned right by the base of the stone steps, opening a gate all of them had passed several times by now without so much as a glance. Nagisa shot Haru an amused look he chose to ignore, his earns burning as he obediently followed Makoto to the front door. The glass bottle was once again filled with flowers. Up close, even the small boulder seemed well-groomed, its coat of moss a healthy, vibrant green.

“Wait here, everyone, I’ll be back in a moment,” promised Makoto, and with a turn of his keys, the door was soon pulled shut behind him. From the faint sound of his voice, he was heading to the living room in search of his mother, but his call was soon drowned out by the happy roar of children, followed by a growing thud of rapid footsteps as Ran and Ren came scurrying down the hall shouting for Onii-chan. They must have been used to catching Makoto in the hallway, judging by their surprised voices and how Ran opened the front door to peer out just in case, where she froze at the sight of four young adults staring back at her instead of her brother. Ren peered over her shoulder and took a step backwards. Ran quirked her brow.

“Are you Onii-chan’s friends?” she asked in a curious tone, eyeing their now familiar uniforms. Nagisa nodded with a grin. The twins exchanged excited glances.

“Then one of you must be Haru-chan!” said Ren, their little faces so bright in anticipation that the others had to smother their laughter.

“This is Haruka-senpai,” said Rei with a smile, stepping to the side to afford the children a better look at Haru, who had been casually hiding behind him. The twins squealed in delight.

“Haru-chan! Haru-chan!” they began chanting as they hurried over and seized Haru by his hands, jumping up and down while Haru stood stunned and silent. “You finally came over, Haru-chan! Onii-chan told us so much about you! Wanna come inside, Haru-chan? We could play games, we have consoles and everything! There is this one game—”

“..We came because Makoto said he had camping equipment,” Haruka managed to say, his hands still limp in their firm little hands. The twins stopped and looked to one another with loud gasps.

“Camping? I wanna go!” cheered Ran, hurrying inside. Ren started after her and was tugged backwards by his own hold on Haru’s hand. After a moment’s hesitation, he let go of the guest to chase after his sister.

“No fair! I wanna go camping, too!” he cried after Ran, the door slamming shut behind him. The children gone, Nagisa now started laughing in earnest.

“You’re really popular around here, Haru-chan,” he risked with a grin. Haruka tensed and turned his head sharply, his eyes falling on the glass bottle. Rei followed his gaze.

“What’s that..?” he asked in a low tone. The question irked Haruka. _Wasn’t it obvious?_

“A grave,” he found himself saying and bit his tongue right after, but it was no use. Why did he have to say anything? Now they’d never stop teasing him about just how familiar he was with Makoto and his stupid house…

“A grave? For what?” asked Kou.

“Pet..” mumbled Haruka, his face growing hot.

“A pet? What pet?” asked Nagisa.

“…Fish,” muttered Haru, sincerely hoping they wouldn’t bother asking Makoto about it, or that his own deductions had been correct, else Makoto might just laugh at him for saying something so foolish. At any rate, Rei seemed satisfied with the answer. He crouched down to put his hands together and Nagisa followed his example, while Haru lowered his eyes in guilt. What if he was wrong? And even if he wasn’t, would Makoto want them to know..?

A few minutes later, the door opened again and out stepped Makoto, his shoulder sagging under a huge cylindrical bag chock full of equipment, including the two folded tents. Ran and Ren followed him outside and now hurried over to Haru, clasping his hands again in the hopes of detaining him for a while. Makoto shot him an apologetic smile, but before he could catch the other’s small nod, his eyes shifted to Rei and Nagisa crouching by the glass bottle. Kou gave Nagisa a nudge with the back of her hand. Nagisa looked up and broke into a smile.

“We were just paying our respects to the fish, Mako-chan!” he said kindly. Haruka’s face colored.

“Huh? How did you—” began Makoto, but as his eyes slipped to the twins, he seemed to find his answer and let out a chuckle. Haruka suppressed a sigh of relief.

“They passed away a long time ago,” said Makoto in a soft tone, his eyes clouding a little. Haru creased his brow.

“Um, did you get your parents’ permission then, Makoto-senpai?” asked Kou, to try and disperse the uncomfortable silence that followed. Makoto nodded, his features reverting to calm cheerfulness.

“They said it would be fine as long as we brought it back in one piece,” he said with a wide smile.

“It looks so big.. I wanna see it!” said Nagisa, springing up from the grave to give Makoto’s bag a few curious pats, as if mere touch alone might give him an idea of its contents. Rei scoffed.

“Now, now, Nagisa-kun, we cannot expect Makoto-san to unpack it right now!”

“Well.. we should probably check if everything is in there,” said Makoto soothingly. Nagisa hummed in agreement.

“We could take it to Haru-chan’s house, there’s plenty of space there!”

Haruka shot him a sour look.

“Who said you could use my place for this?”

“But Haru-chan has so much room,” said Nagisa with a look of confusion. Haruka glanced at Makoto, who shrugged and smiled benignly.

“I’ll do as you say, Haru,” he said in a tone so warm Haruka looked away, for fear he might get seared by the bright glare of those sunny smiles. Ever since Makoto started calling him by that name, there was something about the way it rolled off his tongue that Haruka found hard to ignore, especially when it was said with a smile and a small sideways tilt of the head. The bag must have been heavy, yet Makoto continued to hold it in wait. Haru sighed.

“Come on, then,” he said in a resigned tone and turned towards the gate, managing but a few steps before the twins’ grasping little hands pulled him back. Makoto laughed.

“We have to go for now,” he said to them in a tender tone, “but I’m sure Haru will visit again sometime if we ask him nicely.”

“Will you visit, Haru-chan?” asked Ran immediately. “Pretty please?” she and Ren pleaded in unison. Haru’s eyes widened.

“Sure.. some other time,” he found himself saying in the smallest of voices, unsure why his company was so ardently sought by the twins, and what Makoto could have possibly said about him that warranted a visit, but the twins looked delighted. A moment later, they gave him a squeeze and released his hands. Makoto gave each a pat on their head with his free hand.

“Be good now. I’ll be back soon,” he told them as he followed Haruka to the gate. The others joined him, waving to the children.

“Bye bye!” cried the twins, waving to Makoto’s party until they disappeared beyond the gate and up the stone stairs, climbing it in single file to Haruka’s house.

* * *

Inside, Haru’s living room table had to be toppled over and pushed to the wall to make way for the entirety of the Tachibana family camping equipment. Makoto spent over twenty minutes arranging its contents in groups, but finally deemed it complete to the satisfaction of everyone present, most of whom had never seen a more professional set of camping supplies.

“Amazing! There’s even five of everything for all of us,” said Nagisa with a grin. Kou colored a little and lowered her eyes.

“The equipment seems fine,” she began, “but what are we going to do about the boat fare to the island?”

“Maybe we could hitchhike,” suggested Nagisa, his head now in the ancient training camp booklet he had borrowed from their manager. Kou narrowed her eyes.

“There aren’t any cars or trucks in the ocean.”

“Are _all_ of these deserted islands?” asked Nagisa as though he hadn’t even heard her, swinging the booklet above his head as he stared at the map inside and took a few winding steps, just narrowly avoiding the sharp edges of steel cups on the floor. “Maybe we could camp on a deserted island!”

“That’s a bad idea, Nagisa-kun,” said Rei at once, snatching the booklet away from Nagisa before he might take a blind but painful step inward. Nagisa couldn’t reclaim the booklet, not even by swinging his arms, but it didn’t dampen his spirits one bit. If anything, he looked as excited as ever.

“Let’s have a barbeque on a deserted island!” he cried and raised his fist. Kou joined him.

“Barbeque!” she echoed Nagisa. Makoto smiled.

“Can you please drop this whole deserted island business?” scolded Rei. “There are more pressing matters, you know.. we still need money for transportation.”

This was the point where they all fell into troubled silence. Even splitting the boat fare would have still cost them far more than they could spare, especially when they considered all the food and hygiene products they would have had to buy for the trip.

“Do you think Ama-chan has a boat?”

“I seriously doubt it, Nagisa-kun.”

“You don’t happen to know someone with a boat, do you, Mako-chan?” asked Nagisa in a hopeful tone. Makoto flinched, but broke into a sad smile and shook his head.

“No… not anymore,” he said quietly. Haru stole a concerned glance at him.

“Wait, Nagisa-kun..” breathed Rei, his eyes widening in realization. “We _do_ know someone with a boat!”

“Do we?! Who?!”

“Sasabe-sensei, of course!” cried Rei, as though the answer had been obvious from the very beginning. “Haruka-senpai, could you give Makoto-san your phonebook?”

“Eh?” balked Makoto. Rei flashed him a sheepish smile.

“You were the one who managed to find his number last time, Makoto-san..” he said as he trailed off in embarrassed laughter. Makoto’s brow wrinkled at the memory of their strategy meeting, but he nodded, and when Haru gave him the phonebook, he dialed Pizza Boy to place an order, which the others agreed to pay for not to impose on Makoto.

* * *

The camping equipment was hastily repacked and the table restored to its rightful place to welcome Sasabe Goro, who dutifully delivered one extra large pepperoni pizza, then gave them an acrid frown when he found he had been duped again. He flopped down on the pillow they had prepared for him at the head of the table as five pairs of determined eyes fixed on him. He rubbed at his neck in growing discomfort.

“Yes, I still have the squid fishing boat my grandpa left me, and I have a boating license,” he told them to satisfy their curiosity. “However… you buy me _one_ pizza and expect me to do you a favor like that?” he continued, his brow furrowed in disbelief.

“Please help us out!” pleaded Makoto, clasping his hands together.

“We’ll also give you this!” joined in Nagisa, who held out a masterfully carved wooden figurine of Iwatobi-chan, one of the few Haruka had left after his recruitment project.

“I don’t want that!” snapped Sasabe, his tone so offended Nagisa twitched backwards, but as the coach sank back into his seat, those once determined eyes around him turned sheepish and wide as little children’s. Sasabe sighed. Just like Makoto, he always had a soft spot for kids, so small and eager, and growing up way too fast. His face scrunched up, hoping for a last moment change of heart, then relaxed in defeat.

“Oh, _fine,_ ” he muttered, the others staring at him as though they couldn’t believe their ears. Sasabe now cracked a jovial smile at Nagisa, as if to make up for shouting at him earlier.

“I can’t participate in your camp, but I can take you there and back.”

Nagisa’s hands slammed on the table in excitement.

“Really?!”

“Yeah.”

Everyone exchanged happy glances and broke into relieved cheers, even Makoto.

“I could use a little cruise, anyway,” said Sasabe as he folded his arms contentedly. Rei gave him a look.

“A cruise in a squid fishing boat?” he mumbled in disapproval, but nobody paid his complaint any heed, not when their relief was great enough to make such details a mere trifle.

“Thank you very much!” said Makoto, his smile happy and earnest. Sasabe nodded.

“No problem.”

“Here, take this!” said Kou, holding out another wooden Iwatobi-chan. Sasabe cringed.

“ _I told you, I don’t want that!_ ”

* * *

Having so successfully persuaded Coach Sasabe, the entire swim club was in excellent spirits, but hardly anyone looked forward to the training camp as much as Makoto, whose desire to be useful to his team had finally come to fruition. First, his equipment gave them hope of being able to realize their dream, then his former resourcefulness and the phone call he made secured the person who granted the rest. Makoto might not have been the only one who felt accomplished in the matter, as nobody could deny that the whole idea stemmed from Kou, and Rei was the one who officially made the decision to hold the training camp in the captain’s place, but having achieved so much in such a short time still did wonders for Makoto’s self-esteem. After fighting so hard, he finally found his true niche in the swim club… and all of it thanks to Haruka.

_You look out for everyone and give them support. That’s what a team needs and you’re better at it than anyone. So.. from now on, you can do that whenever you want._

And so he did and did it gladly, so caught up in his own success he now thirsted for the upcoming training camp in earnest, once again shoving his darkest apprehensions to the bottom of his mind. Nagisa and Kou bounced around so cheerfully that Makoto could hardly think of anything distressing while he watched them, and when Nagisa proposed that everyone walk to the train station together, Makoto happily obliged them.

Haruka followed him almost naturally. He himself remained quiet the whole way, leaving Makoto to talk enough for both of them, and all in all it had been a pleasant walk that ended in cheerful goodbyes as Kou, Nagisa, and Rei disappeared on board their respective trains. Makoto and Haru kept waving to them until they slipped out of sight, but stood there for a moment longer, watching the world go by. Haruka seemed distant and immersed in thought. Makoto turned to him with a smile.

“Shall we head back, Haru?” he asked quietly.

“Yeah,” replied Haruka.

* * *

Now that it was just the two of them, the absence of loud chatter made a striking difference, but Makoto looked unfettered by Haruka’s taciturnity, nor did he seem to notice the uneasiness with which his friend’s gaze fell to the ground.

“Looks like this camp’s going to work out after all,” mused Makoto out loud as the two of them entered the bay. “Remember when you said nothing would come of it?” he laughed, a soft, warm chuckle that had Haruka turn his head just a little more. “I guess all we have to do now is ask permission from Ama-chan-sensei.”

“Yeah.”

“A training camp with everyone… I’m looking forward to it,” said Makoto, determined to persuade himself, and unable to suppress his relieved laughter when his heart fluttered at the thought instead of falling to the bottom of his stomach like it first had when Kou showed them the booklet. “I’m not sure how well I’ll swim, but it should be fun…!”

Makoto might have been able to fool his own heart, but Haruka’s gave a leap that left barbed shivers in his chest. He took a few more steps and then stopped in his tracks, his eyes sharply hung on Makoto’s back. The other walked a few meters ahead before he realized he had left Haruka behind. He turned and their eyes met. The bay melted away.

“What’s wrong?” asked Makoto, his voice suddenly smaller. Haru stared at him for a long moment before he managed to speak.

“Are you really okay with this?”

“Huh?”

Makoto’s cheeks grew a little paler. Haru lowered his eyes.

“Swimming has been hard for you. Will you be okay?” he said, his gaze flitting back to catch Makoto’s. His friend stared frozen, but after a small pause, he forced a smile.

“I’ll be fine. Don’t worry about me,” he said with a faint chuckle.

 _Easy for you to say_ , thought Haru, but unsure what else he could say, he simply sighed and caught up to Makoto, who ended up walking Haruka all the way to his front door up the stairs, to thank him for storing his family’s camping equipment.

* * *

The next day, Kou was charged with the important task of filling in Ama-chan, and asking her permission as well as her presence for the training camp. Amakata Miho stared at her in wonderment, though she felt she should have expected her stubborn children to put up a good fight once their hearts were set.

“But what will you do for accommodation and boat fare?” she asked in a soft lilt. “It would be very expensive to provide for six people…”

Kou slapped her hands on her hips in triumph.

“Makoto-senpai has camping equipment, and the swim coach who used to work at the Iwatobi Swimming Club will give us a ride on his boat!”

“A swim coach..?” echoed Ama-chan. Kou nodded with a grin.

“Sasabe Goro-sensei!”

“How wonderful and generous!” breathed Amakata. “I must thank him for being so kind to us all! But, Kou-chan, where will you be staying?”

“Well, Makoto-senpai said his equipment can accommodate five people…” said Kou with an awkward glance to the side. Ama-chan gasped.

“We can’t have that!” she said at once. “A tent full of boys is no place for a girl, Kou-chan! You can do much better than that!”

“Much better..?” mumbled Kou. “How, Ama-chan-sensei?”

“Don’t you worry, Kou-chan, leave everything to me,” said Ama-chan with her sweetest smile. “We girls have to stick together, right?”

“Right,” chirped Kou, and a few days later, permission was generously granted.


	25. EPISODE 5: Trial in Open Water! - Part 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once Amakata Miho gave permission to her students, then requested a week’s paid leave from the school board, she found herself in a curious situation. The prefectural tournament fell on the penultimate weekend of the first trimester, leaving them three more weeks to prepare for it, but since the trimester was nearing its end, no one would grant Amakata-sensei leave during the exam period, which was a mere two weeks away. This left her no choice but to suggest that the training camp be held in the final week of June, just before exams and just in time for the prefectural tournament. Her proposal was eventually accepted on one condition: that she provide ample study material for her classes so that they could prepare for their Classic Literature exams in her absence. As their exam would have been a take-home essay anyway, Amakata Miho was in luck. After all, it was her five students who had to make do without a week’s worth of study material, but since the swim club was prepared to give it their all, the rest of the week was spent inquiring after the course load they were going to miss, and cramming for upcoming exams so that the material would only need be reread a few more times once they arrived back home.

The sudden increase in their workload, coupled with practice and other obligations, soon pushed any other concern out of their minds, and before they knew it, the day of departure had arrived. Come dawn of the last Monday of June, Makoto found himself dressed and ready to leave, his family gathered in the hallway in nothing but their pajamas to bid the eldest son a safe trip.

“Have fun,” said Ran with a yawn.

“Buy souvenirs,” moaned Ren as he rubbed his tired eyes.

“Stay safe, son,” said Makoto’s father, while his mother nodded with a look of tender concern. Makoto’s shoulders were drooping under the equipment, which he had brought back from Haru so they could assemble and test the tents just in case, but now he straightened and did his best to look confident.

“I will. Take care!” he said to his parents before his eyes flitted to the twins, who remained inconsolable and released Onii-chan with a heavy heart. “Be good now,” he told them with his brightest smile, and a moment later, the door closed behind him for good. He let out a sigh once nobody could hear him anymore, and before he left for the gate, he put his hands together by the moss-covered rock and its glass bottle.

“I bet you would have loved to swim instead of me,” he whispered to his fish beneath the cold earth, still unable to raise his voice after six long years. A soft gust of wind swept by. The petals of the flowers in the glass bottle fluttered in its wake. “I’m sorry.”

Makoto bowed his head in goodbye, then walked down the steps in front of his gate, but when he turned towards the stone stairs, he spotted Haru sitting under the single torii with one of the neighborhood cats purring contentedly beside him. He seemed to be lost in thought, his hand brushing over the cat’s fur in slow, even strokes. Makoto broke into a smile. The way Haru used to stare at the white kitten in his hand had him worrying his friend didn’t like cats at all.

“Morning, Haru!” he called to the other from below. Haruka lifted his head in a silent greeting, gathering his bag and the blue cooler beside him to join Makoto. He took one look at his friend and thought all that camping equipment might be heavy, especially when Makoto also had a bag of personal belongings to carry. Haru paused.

“I’ll take one of the tents,” he said, pointing to the bags peeking over Makoto’s shoulder. His friend blinked in surprise.

“Are you sure, Haru? You don’t have to..”

Haruka merely nodded in reply, and once he relieved Makoto of a single tent ( _Thank you, Haru_ ), the two began their descent towards the bay.

“Oh, the twins told me to say hi,” Makoto told him as they made the first turn. Haruka looked at him, his brow quirked. “They were really upset they weren’t allowed to come with us. They told me they were going to miss out on all the fun.”

“Ah,” came the awkward reply. Makoto paused.

“Say, Haru..”

“What?” asked Haruka, his voice smaller than usual. Makoto gave him a sheepish look.

“You will probably be really busy after the training camp with exams and whatnot, but when you have some time, Ran and Ren would love for you to come over.”

“Why?” Haru found himself asking, catching Makoto off guard as well.

“Eh?”

“Why do they want me to come over? They don’t know me.”

Makoto laughed. Haru’s lips pursed in a small frown.

“Well, uh.. they’ve heard a lot about you, so they’d like to get to know you better,” said Makoto, his eyes lowered and voice growing softer as he added, “And if we could spend time together, it would mean a lot to me.”

Makoto must have meant himself _and_ the twins, Haruka knew it was the only rational way to understand those words, yet his face grew uncomfortably hot as he turned his head and replied,

“Only if I have time.”

He almost expected Makoto to start cajoling him as people were often wont to do, but Makoto merely tilted his head with a smile that verged so obviously on amused laughter it exasperated Haruka, all the more so because he no longer found it as annoying as he should have.

* * *

By the time the two of them reached the bay, Sasabe Goro had prepared the squid fishing boat for departure. Kou, Nagisa, and Rei formed a tight cluster as they waited for everyone to arrive, all of them dressed in bright, happy colors that made Haruka and Makoto look rather boring in comparison.

“Haru-chan! Mako-chan! Over here!” cried Nagisa with big sweeping waves of his arm, as though the four of them with their piles of luggage were easy to miss. Makoto waved back with a grin, he and Haruka soon joining the circle for a round of cheerful good mornings (or in Haru’s case, a reasonable facsimile thereof.)

“Is everyone here?” asked Sasabe, who judged the group from around the table complete. Rei pushed his glasses back.

“We’re still missing Amakata-sensei,” he replied, and as if on cue, a tiny pink car swept past them, whirling around with lightning speed to take the first free parking space nearby. Everyone was stunned still, but their shock lasted well beyond Ama-chan’s reckless driving when she finally appeared in a flowing summer dress and a large rolling suitcase. Kou merely smiled and Sasabe stared confused, but the boys eyed her and that large beige monster in dull-eyed disapproval. Was Ama-chan aware she would be dragging those tiny wheels in the sand for a week straight? Somehow, they doubted it.

“Sorry to keep you all waiting!” chirped Ama-chan as she drew her suitcase over to them. She then reached inside her handbag, completely unfazed by their baffled looks. “You must be Sasabe-san,” she said to the gawking coach next, producing a neatly bundled bento that she reached out to him with a smile. “Thank you for your help. Please take this. It’s just a token, but…”

“Oh, thank you,” blurted Sasabe as he relieved her of the gift, his eyes never leaving her face. Amakata Miho quirked a brow.

“Is something wrong?”

“Oh, uh… I was wondering,” replied Sasabe, his eyes narrowing in concentration and what he could only describe as déjà vu. “Have we met before?”

It seemed like a harmless question, yet Amakata stared at him as though she had seen a ghost.

“ _No,_ we haven’t!” she cried at once, forcing an innocent smile. “This is the first time I’ve met you..!”

“Is he trying to hit on her?” muttered Kou behind Sasabe’s back. The coach flinched.

“I’m not trying to hit on her!” he snapped in reply, then cleared his throat more loudly than necessary. “Everyone, time to get on board!”

As the boys had been crowding by the side, they shoved their bags onto the boat, and once they all climbed in, Makoto reached out a helping hand for Kou. In turn, Coach Sasabe did the same for Ama-chan when he was done hauling up her luggage. They were now ready to sail, and to add a little extra flair to their cruise, Sasabe hoisted a large colorful flag on the mast with _Big Catch Sasa_ written on it.

“I’ll fly our flag with a prayer for your training camp’s success!” he said to the others, obviously happy to see the flag in its rightful place after a long hiatus. He then made his way over to the stirring wheel, while the others hurried to find themselves suitable places on board.

Nagisa immediately singled out the very edge of the bow, so Rei stopped a few steps away to keep an eye on him. Ama-chan and Kou sat down near the two of them to enjoy the view, and after some consideration, Makoto sank down by the side with his back to the water. In some respects, his seat was ill-chosen as he now faced the cabin, but Haru decided not to ask. Instead he perched himself opposite his friend, just a little to the side to stay in clear view of the water but within easy distance of Makoto.

“Now, let’s set sail!” called out Sasabe.

“Full speed ahead!” cheered Kou.

“Deserted islands, here we come!” cried Nagisa, throwing his arms wildly to the side at the front of the bow, his shirt seized in the back by an anxious Rei.

“We’re not going to a deserted island and don’t stand so close to the edge, Nagisa-kun!”

“I’m king of the world!”

“ _Nagisa-kun!!_ ”

* * *

For someone who had never been on a boat ride before, Makoto had a very agreeable journey, if only because he never once looked at the waves below, his gaze almost always fixed on Haruka. The other was his complete opposite, eyes constantly on the water and hardly sparing a glance at Makoto, but as he proved all ears when it came to his friend’s attempts at conversation, they spent their time in loose talk and entertained each other very well. Kou and Ama-chan scooted closer and closer over time, until they ended up sitting together, immersing themselves in some private conference that Nagisa and Rei could have eavesdropped on easily, but both had missed the opportunity. Nagisa remained by the bow till the last moment, and having inadvertently forced Rei to stand guard by his side on a wobbly platform for the entirety of the trip, Rei’s discomfort soon swelled into raging seasickness. His complexion turned green by the time they pulled up to the pier, and the moment his foot touched solid ground, Rei blurted _Excuse me_ and rushed off towards the nearest beach facility, with nothing but a handkerchief pressed to his face.

“Is Rei going to be okay?” asked Makoto, his brow creasing in worry. Nagisa patted his arm with an awkward smile.

“Don’t worry, Mako-chan, I’m sure Rei-chan will be fine, but I’ll check on him just in case!” he said, then promptly dashed off to the building Rei disappeared into, leaving Haru and Makoto to help unload everyone’s luggage from the boat.

“This place is gorgeous!” sighed Kou, accepting Makoto’s arm again once every item had been hoarded onto the pier.

“I’m so glad I came!” agreed Ama-chan as Coach Sasabe gallantly took her suitcase for her and helped her off the boat. He then climbed back on board and disappeared in the cabin, only to emerge with a red cooler.

“And here’s a gift from me,” he said as he handed it over to Haruka, who in turn was relieved of it by Makoto so it could find its place next to Haru’s blue cooler.

* * *

The moment Rei entered the restroom, he fell to his knees in one of the stalls, waiting in agony for his seasickness to either disperse with time, or leave him by sheer force. That was how Nagisa found him, and though he shook his head, his expression was laden with guilt.

“You should have sat down, Rei-chan,” he said quietly as he dug into his pocket and pulled out a packet of strong mints to give Rei a piece. The other fumbled for it and shoved it into his mouth, sucking furiously until the cold burst of menthol shot through his nostrils, clearing his aching head.

“It is _you_ who should have sat down, Nagisa-kun..” he managed to force out between hard suckles of the mint. “Standing near the very edge.. low railing… what if you had fallen…”

Nagisa let out an awkward laugh and scratched the back of head, his cheeks a warm pink.

“I didn’t really think about that…” he said as he walked over to the small window in the far end, propping his arms on the windowsill to wait for Rei.

“What were you thinking about then..?” demanded Rei in a weak voice, but he received no answer. He fell silent for a little while himself, crushing the mint between his molars and taking deep breaths to steady himself, and once his nausea relented, Rei rose from the toilet and walked to the sink to wash his face. Nagisa was still standing by the window as motionless as a statue. Rei frowned.

“Didn’t you hear what I said, Nagisa-kun?”

“Rei-chan…” came the alarmingly slow reply. Rei blinked and closed the distance in a few hurried steps, his head peeking out above Nagisa’s.

“What is it?”

“There..!” pointed Nagisa. Rei’s eyes widened in a gasp. “Do you think it’s—”

“We’d better tell the others right away,” said Rei in an urgent tone, and once Nagisa nodded in agreement, they bolted out of the restroom and ran back towards the pier.

* * *

In the few short minutes the two of them were gone, Coach Sasabe assumed his place by the stirring wheel again to leave the shore for Iwatobi Harbor. Everyone present gathered by the edge of the pier to see him off and wave goodbye, knowing well he was only to return on their last day of camp.

“Good luck! I’ll see you in a week!” shouted Sasabe. A few expert maneuvers later, he brought his boat around, and set sail with his flag still in place.

“Thank you very much!” cried the others after him, their arms in the air until Coach Sasabe had shrunk so much into the distance they could no longer see him waving back.

“I’ll look around for a good camping site,” offered Ama-chan, who had been longing to take a walk down the beach. Her motion was gladly accepted. The others remained behind to look after their bags, all of which had been accounted for in the meantime except the coolers, the contents of which remained unknown and had tried Kou’s patience far enough. She unlocked and opened the red cooler left to them by Coach Sasabe, finding it chock full of ice, a few canned sodas, and half a dozen frozen pizzas courtesy of Pizza Boy. Kou shook her head with a lenient smile. She then opened the blue cooler Haruka had brought with him. Her eyes narrowed.

“What’s this?” she said out loud, staring down at what appeared to be raw fish.

“Mackerel,” came Haruka’s reply from behind her. Kou groaned.

“You like mackerel way too much,” she said to Haruka with a glare, only to be interrupted by the distressed cries of Rei and Nagisa, who came running full speed towards their group.

“Everyone!” Rei called out to them the moment they reached the base of the pier. Nagisa’s shoulders were shaking as he doubled over with loud gasps.

“You gotta see this!” he blurted out between ragged breaths, one hand limply thrown out in the direction they were coming from. “Hurry, hurry!”

Makoto and Haruka exchanged looks, one more worried than the other, and once Ama-chan could be prevailed upon to come back and guard their equipment, the boys and Kou hurried off with Nagisa and Rei.

* * *

It took them some ten minutes of arduous running to get to the very heart of the tropical forest that seemed to stretch from shore to island shore, but at last they reached the upper glass walls of what appeared to be an enormous deep-structure sports facility. Ama-chan had briefly brought it to their attention when she received permission from the school board, but they quickly dismissed it as financially impossible. Now it seemed it was just as well, for the entire pool had been reserved for none other than the swim team of Samezuka Academy.

“Inoue! Yamanaka! You’re falling behind! Pick up the pace!” they heard a familiar voice shout from below. Makoto tensed, his brow creased at the memory of hearing it up close.

“So the students we saw from the window really _were_ from Samezuka Academy…” muttered Rei as they gathered by the glass to take a peek inside. Nagisa kneeled down to get a closer look and sure enough, he soon found what he was after.

“Look, Rin-chan’s here too..!” he said as he pointed out a small red-haired figure near Captain Mikoshiba. Rei’s eyes widened. He quickly turned to shoot Kou an accusing look.

“Is this _your_ doing, Kou-san?” he asked with narrowed eyes. Kou looked positively shocked.

“What? I swear I didn’t know about anything this time!” she blurted, her cheeks flushed in indignation.

“Really?” asked Nagisa. Kou sighed and lowered her head.

“I mean, my brother never even talks to me anymore…” she said in a small voice that turned Makoto’s features hard as stone. He and Haruka were the only ones still staring down at the Samezuka swim team, but the look of disapproval Makoto gave the eldest Matsuoka from above was heavy enough for four times his number. Thankfully, it went unnoticed by everyone around him, Rin included.

“And besides…” continued Kou, stealing a glance at Haru whose distant, determined expression caused her to stop mid-sentence. Neither she nor Haruka had mentioned the fateful encounter behind the ZERO store to the others, and as Haruka chose not to speak, Kou decided to leave that decision to him.

“Besides?” Nagisa prompted her, but Kou merely flashed him an apologetic smile.

“Oh, it’s nothing.”

“So it’s just a coincidence,” said Nagisa, sounding cheerful again. “In that case, we should go down there and say hello!”

“Don’t,” said Haruka in a firm voice. Nagisa blinked.

“Huh? Why not?”

Haruka lowered his eyes, but his expression remained the same.

“I promised him we would meet at prefecturals.”

“What? Really?” cried Nagisa in surprise, and when Haruka nodded, he and Rei broke into hopeful smiles.

 _When did that happen?_ wondered Makoto, but while Nagisa and Rei welcomed Haruka’s news as an exciting development, Makoto’s lips curled into a small, bitter frown. Rin seemed to hang over them like a dark shadow whatever they did, wherever they went. Of all the sports facilities in Japan, why did he have to come right here, right now, and why would Haru make him such a promise in the first place? Had Rin not caused enough damage? Did he coerce Haru to make that promise? The more he thought about it, the darker Makoto’s expression had become, and though he did his best to smooth out his features by the time Rei suggested they leave, he shot the culprit one last look that sent barbed tingles up Rin’s spine. His eyes darted to the glass above and missed the united Iwatobi Swim Club by mere seconds. Nitori followed his eyes.

“What is it, Senpai?” he asked in a cautious tone. Rin’s shoulders relaxed, but only a little.

“Oh.. I thought I smelled something,” he found himself saying, his thoughts whirling around a line from a famous English play. _Something is rotten in the state of Denmark._ Or was there a better English phrase for it..?

“Smelled something?”

_To smell fishy: to seem suspicious. That’s it._

“Smelled like mackerel,” replied Rin with a sharp glare at the glass. Nitori didn’t catch his meaning.

“Oh, Matsuoka! You’ve got a good nose!” said Captain Mikoshiba behind him, equally oblivious and obviously impressed. “We’re having mackerel curry for lunch! Now practice hard!” he roared to the rest of the club, and everyone cried in the affirmative except for Rin, who turned away in resentment. He walked to the starting blocks and left Nitori staring after him in concern, wondering why Senpai disliked fish so much.

* * *

While Samezuka Academy pushed forward towards the sweet and spicy promise of mackerel curry, the Iwatobi Swim Club headed back towards the beach, where Ama-chan had been keeping herself busy with the aid of a small booklet. As soon as she saw them, however, she stood up, ready to hand all responsibility back to her students without a moment’s delay.

“That spot near the stairs would be perfect for your tents,” she greeted them, motioning towards a stretch of sand by the small flight of stone steps Rei had first taken to reach the restroom. The restroom, and a roof-protected wooden platform with a large table right next to it were within easy distance of the steps, so the boys agreed to erect their tents close by.

“While you boys set up camp, I’ll go and get something to drink,” Ama-chan told them next, and when everyone nodded and told her they would guard her suitcase, she left them with a happy smile to finally take the walk they had interrupted earlier. Her place near the bags was occupied by Kou so the tent building could begin, with Haruka and Makoto working on one as Rei and Nagisa assembled the other. The ocean frothed and foamed invitingly behind them the entire time, but for better or worse, their thoughts kept drifting back towards the sports facility, and one of its guests in particular.

When Ama-chan came back ten minutes later, the tents were starting to take their final shape.

“You are doing very well,” she said cheerfully. Nagisa let out a whine.

“I bet Samezuka students get to stay in the hotel,” he moaned as he secured another corner. “And go to a nice facility everyday..! I wanna swim in a fifty-meter pool…”

“Samezuka Academy?” replied Ama-chan with a surprised look, but when they filled her in on their discovery, she shrugged her shoulders with a soothing smile.

“I guess powerhouse schools do get special treatment,” was all she had to say on the matter, unfettered by the idea of their having to sleep in tents instead of comfortable rooms.

“They’re clearly in a different class,” muttered Rei with a frown. Haruka shrugged.

“Doesn’t matter,” he said quietly. At his words, Makoto paused and broke into a smile, hoping it was simply another way of saying, _I don’t care if Rin is here as long as I can be with my friends_.

“Haru’s right,” he said, glad to have something positive to latch onto. “Our goal for this training camp is to build stamina anyway.”

“Right! We still have our deserted islands!” replied Nagisa with renewed enthusiasm. Rei scoffed.

“Are you comparing fifty-meter pools to deserted islands?” he scolded Nagisa.

“Aren’t they similar?” asked his friend, earning an angry groan from Rei.

“How are they similar?!” he harped, but before Nagisa could draw up a list, Ama-chan cleared her throat and reached for the handle of her suitcase.

“Okay, then,” she said as she turned to Kou. “Let’s go check in at the lodge.”

“Sure,” came the happy reply, followed by a series of surprised chokes from behind the tents.

“ _The lodge?_ ” came a chorus of confused voices as all of them hurried over to their advisor and manager to demand an explanation, Haruka tagging along out of mere curiosity.

“What do you mean?” asked Nagisa with his brow creased. Ama-chan flashed him a sweet smile.

“We booked lodging for ourselves,” she explained, whirling around like a show hostess to extend her hand towards the rows of handsome houses in the distance. “Over there!”

Makoto, Rei, and Nagisa stared at her utterly betrayed, but Ama-chan remained as unmoved as Haruka.

“You can’t expect a couple of girls to sleep outside,” she told them with her brightest smile. “Right, Kou-chan?” she nodded to Kou, whose role had been key in securing less expensive accommodation for two, instead of Ama-chan having to pay for a single lodge all by herself.

“Right!” came the glowing reply.

Makoto, Nagisa and Rei stood there wide-eyed, absolutely gutted that even their faithful manager had forsaken them for a cozy bed, but Kou looked just as pleased with herself as Ama-chan. The two of them soon disappeared up the stone stairs and down the path, leaving the four boys and all their belongings behind.

“Class difference again…” said Rei under his breath. Nagisa’s brow creased pitifully.

“Are we really the bottom one percent?”

Makoto’s lips parted. He almost caught himself saying he wished he could go with them, to sleep in a lodge instead of a tent that was much too close to the ocean, but he bit his tongue just in time. Having offered the tents himself, it would have been ridiculous to pine for what he couldn’t have, and besides… _Besides…_ if he asked Haru nicely, perhaps he wouldn’t mind sharing a tent with him…

“Like Haru said, it doesn’t matter,” was all he allowed himself to say, and when Haruka turned to him with his brow quirked, Makoto tried for a smile that might have looked weak and insincere, but still had warmth enough to make Haru tense and turn his head.

* * *

Ama-chan and Kou soon checked in and successfully claimed their accommodation for the next seven days, marveling at their good luck when they realized that most of the neighboring buildings had been reserved for Samezuka Academy. On the street below, tracksuit-clad students kept popping up like mushrooms, but thankfully, none of them were noisy. All Kou could hear from her window was a faint murmur as they passed on the way to, or back from, the convenience store down the road.

“This is a lovely place,” came Ama-chan’s voice from behind her, having settled down by the small living room table to look at her booklet, which she stuck full of post-it notes for easy reference of everything the island had to offer.

“They offer rock bathing nearby, and the guide says they also offer a seasonal facial treatment in summer. If we go now, we can get free coupons for extra hyaluronan!” continued Ama-chan, unaware she had since lost Kou’s attention to the steady flock of Samezuka students walking down the street. While her advisor unpacked her suitcase, then left with a small portable folding chair to supervise the Iwatobi Swim Club, Kou remained by the window for a little longer, hoping Onii-chan might show up as well.

She must have spent at least half an hour watching students come and go, to no avail. Indeed, she had seen dozens of unfamiliar faces before an acquaintance appeared at last, and unluckily for him, he wasn’t the one she was most longing to see.

“Kou-san! Is that you, Kou-san?” waved Mikoshiba Seijuurou with a grin, having managed to catch a glimpse of her on his way to the convenience store.

“Captain Mikoshiba..!” replied Kou, her cheeks a little flushed at how loudly he was yelling to her from the street. _Seriously…_ “What are you doing here?” she managed to ask in an innocent tone. Mikoshiba grinned even wider.

“Samezuka Academy is holding a training camp to prepare for prefecturals! The entire swim team is here!”

“Everyone..?” asked Kou with as much surprise as she could muster. “Even my brother?”

“Absolutely! In fact, Matsuoka’s room is the one next to mine. Shall I relay a message to him, Kou-san?”

“Oh… no, it’s fine,” replied Kou with a sheepish smile. “I think it’s better if he doesn’t know we’re here…”

“ _We?_ Is your family here with you, Kou-san?” asked Seijuurou, his tone a tad more serious at the idea that he might meet the young lady’s mother. Kou blinked.

“N-No, actually, I’m here with the Iwatobi Swim Club,” she replied, though the mental image of Ama-chan as the mother of four boys and herself made her want to laugh. “They are also on a training camp.”

“How wonderful,” said Mikoshiba, internally congratulating the swim club on having chosen the perfect time and place to harmonize with Samezuka. “Then tell them to train hard, for Samezuka will show them _no mercy at prefecturals!_ ”

“We will _never_ lose to Samezuka!” cried Kou with her fist in the air, but the way Seijuurou grinned up at her with flushed cheeks caused her to lower her hand to hide her own smile. She smothered a giggle with little success. Seijuurou scratched at the nape of his neck.

“Are you busy, Kou-san?” he ventured to say at last, his voice politely lowered. “Will you have a cup of coffee with me?”

Kou blinked, then scratched her cheek with a finger.

“Oh.. sorry, I have to go and supervise the swim club,” she replied, her tone almost apologetic. Seijuurou looked disappointed, but only for a moment. It was evident Kou-san would have gladly chosen him, had she no pressing obligations, and that was good enough for now.

“Ah, I see… well, some other time then!” he replied with a jovial smile and a casual salute, and once Kou said her goodbyes and disappeared from the window, Seijuurou continued his trip to the convenience store, his head so full of pleasant daydreams he walked right into a student at the entrance.


	26. EPISODE 5: Trial in Open Water! - Part 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The moment camp had been set up, with all belongings temporarily stashed away in one of the tents for safe keeping, Rei proposed they use the other tent to change into their swimsuits, and begin their training as soon as everyone was ready. The motion was accepted and Makoto allowed to go first, but as though he could hardly wait, Haruka also began stripping right in front of the tent. Rei screeched, and even Nagisa looked baffled, but when Haru’s pants hit the sand, they discovered to their relief that the captain had once again donned his jammers in lieu of underwear.

“Seriously, Haruka-senpai…” muttered Rei, pretending he didn’t see his senior’s shameless display. “Couldn’t you have done that in the tent like everyone else?”

“I didn’t need to,” shrugged Haruka. Nagisa laughed.

“That’s why Haru-chan is Haru-chan,” he said, earning a loud scoff from Rei and an unamused look from Haruka, who folded his clothes without another word and laid them down neatly in the storage tent. By the time he stepped out, Makoto had also emerged from the other tent, his legskin delightfully taut and defined against his skin. In one hand, he held a large bottle of lotion. Haruka and Nagisa turned to him with curious glances, while Rei passed him with hurried steps to enter the tent and keep their queue going.

“Is that sunscreen, Mako-chan?” asked Nagisa outside. Makoto nodded with a smile.

“I burn easily, so I brought a few bottles just in case,” he replied, holding it out for the others to see. “There’s enough to go around if any of you need some.”

“I do, I do!” said Nagisa immediately. “Can you put some on my back when you’re done? It’s so hard to reach there..!” he went on, one arm twisted backwards and wriggling aimlessly about to prove his point. Makoto chuckled.

“Sure,” he said, his smile innocently obliging, while Nagisa’s grin seemed offensively pleased. Haruka shot him a sour look, in vain, for Nagisa’s grin then turned into a cheeky smirk.

“I bet Haru-chan needs help putting it on too, since his arms don’t bend far enough,” he said in a cheerful tone, but received no answer. Haruka turned his head archly, and Makoto’s ears began to burn with more than just the rays of the morning sun. He unscrewed the cap, then started slathering his face and chest vigorously with lotion, no longer looking at the others and missing the subtle turn of Haruka’s head in his direction. Haru did his best not to stare, but the more glances he stole at Makoto, the hotter his cheeks had become. _Why am I even looking_ , he asked himself, his heart humming a little too fast. Hadn’t he seen enough naked torsos in the course of his swimming career to become bored and disinterested? And even if he had some unfathomable but apparently pressing reason to look, why was _Nagisa_ staring at Makoto?

At least Nagisa didn’t leave Haru to wonder for long. Makoto was soon finished except for the vastness of his back, which seemed a little more toned each passing day, and the moment Makoto contorted himself to take stock of how much skin was left untreated, Nagisa skipped in front of him and arched his back in anticipation.

“Rub away, Mako-chan!” he said in a delighted purr. Makoto laughed nervously, but he poured some lotion onto his palm and smoothed it over Nagisa’s thin back. His hand was positively enormous as he rubbed large wet circles against the other’s soft skin, flushing a little more as Rei stepped out of the tent and stopped to stare, just as indignantly as Haruka did some ways away.

“Nagisa-kun..?” he asked in a cautious tone. Nagisa’s content grin lapsed into an apologetic smile.

“Mako-chan’s helping me put on sunscreen, Rei-chan,” he said in a light tone. Rei quirked his brow.

“But I thought you told me to buy sunscreen for both of us..” he muttered with a small pout. Nagisa laughed and scratched the back of his head.

“Oh, right! Haha, I forgot about that..!”

“No joke…”

“You’re all done,” said Makoto the next moment with a final hasty stroke of his hand across the small of Nagisa’s back. Rei shook his head, but his face softened a little as he went to fetch his own bottle, while Nagisa thanked Makoto with a happy grin. Makoto was now facing away from Haruka, his back dry and matte against the light glisten of his arms and shoulders. Haruka tensed.

“Makoto,” he said, waiting for the other to turn, then reaching out his hand in silent request of the bottle, which Makoto handed over with an awkward smile.

“You can have the whole bottle if you want—” he began to say, but Haru quickly walked around him with tinted cheeks and pressed a sloppy handful of cold lotion to Makoto’s back, just between the sharp contours of his shoulder blades. Makoto flinched at the sudden coolness of its heavy trickle down his spine. He let out a nervous chuckle.

“O-Oh.. ha, ha, thank you, Haru…”

Haruka merely hummed, glad nobody could see his face as he spread the lotion across Makoto’s skin, as thoroughly and evenly as humanly possible. It was a remarkably slow process, during which Rei managed to find not only his own bottle of suntan lotion, but also the handmade _Iwatobi Swim Club Training Camp Manual_ compiled by Kou, which he perused while Nagisa covered him in sunscreen from his forehead to the tips of his toes. Nagisa finished a few seconds before Haruka, though he had twice as much skin to cover. Haru seemed aware of this, but did his best not to look in Nagisa’s general direction as he gave Makoto’s back a reluctant final smear.

“Thank you, Haru,” said Makoto in a whisper when no more strokes followed. “D-Do you want me to put some on your back..?”

Haruka hesitated for a moment, then hummed and stepped in front of Makoto without looking at him, his hand held out backwards to pass the bottle to its owner. Makoto carefully took it and began applying sunscreen to the other’s back in gentle paps, and since Haru was so kind as to do an extremely thorough job, Makoto returned the favor with equally close attention to detail. Rei lowered the manual after a while and waited for a few more minutes, but when neither Haruka nor Makoto showed any signs of being ready, he sighed and walked around them to face his patiently idling senpai, whose torso seemed to undulate with every press of Makoto’s hands against it.

“Haruka-senpai, as our captain, I assume you wish to conduct the swim club’s briefing?” asked Rei, reaching out the booklet for Haru to take, but Haru merely stared down at it, giving Rei as reserved a look as his flushed face afforded.

“Not really,” he said with a small, tense shrug as Makoto’s fingers glided to the small of his back and up his spine again. “You do it.”

“Your face is alarmingly red, Haruka-senpai. You haven’t suffered heatstroke, have you?” said Rei in a worried tone. Haruka’s eyes widened in a glare. Rei gulped. “V-Very well, Haruka-senpai.. Please let me know when you are ready.”

Haru gave a small hum in reply.

When Makoto reached out by his side to offer the sunscreen back, Haru took it without a word and smoothed some over his hot face. He soon applied it to all major areas in need of protection, and once the bottle ended up in the storage tent by Makoto’s bag, Haru, Makoto, and Nagisa gathered in front of Rei in a neat row so he could instruct them on their upcoming regimen. Rei nodded in approval and adjusted his goggles in lieu of glasses, the manual pressed to one side and a kickboard tucked to the other.

“We are ready to begin our training, everyone,” he said as he carefully let the booklet slide back into his hand, then used it to motion towards the ocean. “As you can see behind me, there are a number of smaller islands in our vicinity.”

“Deserted islands!” added Nagisa. Rei gave him a glare.

“Will you stop this deserted island nonsense and pay attention, Nagisa-kun?!”

“Sorry, sorry…” said Nagisa with a smile that showed no signs of remorse whatsoever. “Carry on, Rei-chan!”

“Very well… As you can see on this map, we will be swimming between the islands Sukishima, Oshima, and Mizushima for our training,” explained Rei, holding out the open manual so everyone could see the figures Kou had scribbled on her hand-drawn copy of the original map. “The distance between each island is roughly one kilometer. This means approximately four kilometers of swimming and one kilometer of running per circuit, and our goal for today is to complete three entire circuits!”

“That sounds hard,” moaned Nagisa, and as though he just remembered, he turned to Makoto with a concerned look. “Can you handle that, Mako-chan?”

“I’ll be fine,” said Makoto in a low voice, but Rei shook his head.

“We have taken into account that Makoto-san is a beginner, so Kou-san devised a different regimen for him,” he said with a smile, but Makoto looked more alarmed than relieved and firmly shook his head.

“No, please, I’ll do what everyone else is doing,” he said a little too quickly. Haru quirked his brow. “I would rather swim with everyone than by myself…”

Rei didn’t anticipate resistance to a less taxing regimen, so he stared at Makoto in surprise, but the idea that a beginner was willing to put forward more effort than his easier regimen required finally brought a smile of approval to Rei’s face.

“Very well, Makoto-san, if you wish to join us, you are welcome to do so,” he replied. Makoto let out a small sigh. “However, there is one condition.”

“What is it..?” asked Makoto, his tone worried. Rei lowered his eyes.

“Since you are a beginner, I must insist as vice-captain that you use this kickboard every other kilometer while you swim,” he said, reaching out the blue and yellow penguin kickboard he had been holding for Makoto to take. “As you are well aware, I myself don’t float, and will need to use a kickboard if I want to rest mid-swimming,” explained Rei, his cheeks flushed at the idea of having to rely on an unbecoming flotation device. “Therefore, I suggest you use it for your first kilometer of swimming, and then pass it over to me so that I may use it for my second kilometer, from whence we shall alternate until our circuits are complete. That way, both of us will have an easier time, and we won’t be so disadvantaged compared to Haruka-senpai and Nagisa-kun.”

“Ah, that’s fine,” said Makoto in quiet voice, a little saddened that he wouldn’t be able to look at the sky for the entirety of their training, but determined not to be left behind, cost what it might. He took the kickboard and wedged it under his arm with a troubled smile. Rei flashed him a more genuine one.

“Excellent,” he said, looking more content than when he had begun. “I do believe that takes care of everything. It goes without saying that everyone should wait for their fellow teammates before advancing, so with that said—”

“ _Let’s start training!_ ” cried Nagisa with his fist pumped in the air. He snapped his goggles into place and made a running start towards the water. Rei let out an indignant shriek.

“Hold on, Nagisa-kun! Didn’t you hear what I just said?! We’re supposed to start at the same time!” he screeched as he chased after the laughing renegade.

“Hurry up, hurry up!” was all Rei got in reply, he and Nagisa soon on their way towards the distant shores of their first stop, Sukishima. Haruka stared after them and took a step forward to follow, but when he glanced over to Makoto, he stopped despite his impatience to enter the water at last. Makoto stood a few feet away, motionless except for the wind-whipped tufts of his hair. His face was unreadable, but betrayed mild surprise when he noticed Haru looking at him. Their eyes met. Makoto’s lips twitched into a small, soothing smile.

“Don’t worry, Haru. I’ll be fine,” he said as his other hand slipped onto the kickboard held in front of him. “Let’s get going.”

“Yeah…” sighed Haru, watching Makoto move forward, his arms carefully extended as he lay down on the rolling waves. Haru was the only person on the beach now, and wondering how he of all people was last to start swimming, he finally followed Makoto.

* * *

Ama-chan appeared on the beach soon after Haruka had left it, and was more than happy to set up her small folding chair by the storage tent to serve as its leisurely guard. She brought some books to read for entertainment, and set out a small pair of binoculars in easy reach to keep track of her students, who thankfully appeared perfectly self-sufficient, requiring little more than the occasional glance in their direction. Kou arrived some time later dressed in her one-piece swimsuit, and whenever she wasn’t busy taking photographs, she borrowed Ama-chan’s binoculars to watch the others swim.

Their first kilometer to Sukishima seemed to go well. Upon entering the water and beginning to swim in earnest, Haruka had no trouble overtaking Nagisa despite the other’s head start, soon pulling ahead of everyone with Nagisa swimming closely behind him. Nagisa himself was little more than inconvenienced by the unfamiliar sensation of the ocean’s steady pull, but Rei and Makoto soon found they were awfully glad to have the kickboard. Indeed, they hardly knew how they would have managed without it. As much as it hurt Rei’s sense of beauty to rely on a kickboard in the presence of a senior beginner who floated fine without it, Rei’s first kilometer of frantic nonstop butterfly to reach Sukishima as soon as possible had a considerable effect on his feelings towards flotation devices. Makoto fared a little better at first, as he only paddled with his feet, then easily outran his friends in the race towards their next stretch of water, but once he had to part with the kickboard, he was forced to realize that swimming backstroke in the ocean was an entirely new experience. They had entered the water at an angle, so the waves kept throwing Makoto off course, until Haru was obliged to swim back to him and pull him back before he might end up miles away from the stretch of shore they were aiming for.

As Makoto continued to tackle the waves and readjust himself, his style fluctuated between panicked thrashing and cautious drifting. He broke into profuse apologies the moment he reached the shore, but no matter how many times he promised to do better, every round of backstroke brought out the same problems. The only thing that made Makoto feel better was the view of a gorgeous blue sky above, which kept him warm and feeling safe no matter how much he floundered behind the rest.

* * *

At the end of their first circuit, which had to be paused due to the intense heat and so stretched into the early afternoon, the boys were given bentos Ama-chan had bought for them at the convenience store, and then a second coating of sunscreen before the next circuit would begin. They were oiled up quickly this time and ready to go in a matter of minutes, but by the time everyone reached the beach of Oshima again, Rei was struggling even with the kickboard to facilitate his progress. Haruka too had slowed down considerably, and when Nagisa offered a helping hand, Rei gladly grasped it and allowed the other to pull him onto the shore.

“I have studied the latest theories on long distance swimming..” he panted as he doubled over to catch his breath, “..but I didn’t realize it would be so taxing…”

“You did really well, Rei-chan!” said Nagisa, and when Rei managed to lift his head, he flashed his friend a grateful smile. Not too far from them, Makoto was also gasping for air. As if fatigue and the growing stiffness of his shoulders didn’t trouble him enough, his skin was humming with heat that had seared his back and face despite the potent sunscreen he had so generously applied. The ocean was to blame, having licked most of it off during Makoto’s struggle, leaving him with a reddish glow strewn with dark freckles that dotted the slopes of Makoto’s shoulder blades, the ridges of his collarbone, and scattered across his cheeks and the ridge of his nose. Haruka, who had never seen anyone get freckles from the sun, now stole careful glances at the other, stopping only when Makoto caught his eye and the two found themselves locked in a silent stare. Haruka paused and lowered his eyes.

“Good work,” he managed to say in a quiet tone, and distant as he looked with his head turned, his eyes averted just enough to break away from the lure of those large green eyes staring back, Makoto returned the compliment with a small, tired smile.

“It really feels like we’re training now,” said Nagisa, flexing his small biceps for the others to see. “We’ll be a lot stronger when this camp is over! If we win prefecturals and do well at regionals, we’ll be headed to nationals next!” he finished with his fist in the air. Rei shook his head and adjusted his goggles.

“Let’s not get ahead of ourselves, Nagisa-kun,” he said with a smirk, “but I must say I have great hopes for this training camp! If we all work our hardest, I’m sure we will be fit to compete with Samezuka Academy and leave with no regrets!”

Nagisa nodded in glowing enthusiasm, but Makoto’s shoulders drooped until he lowered his head with a sheepish frown. It was blatantly obvious that he and Rei were growing tired already, when they weren’t even half way through the second circuit, yet between the two of them, Rei still performed much better with and without the kickboard. Makoto had been struggling with his pace and maintaining an even, synchronized movement of his limbs, and when he had to measure his progress with a bar set far too high, he found himself painfully short, with no vaulting pole to help him reach the top.

“If we place, we’ll get a bigger budget, too!” added Nagisa, who then turned to Haruka with a grin. “Then we’ll be able to swim indoors during winter!”

“I hope so,” replied Haru in a calm tone that betrayed no anticipation or desire, but Makoto could feel his heart jolt at the thought that Haru’s being able to swim indoors for the rest of the year depended entirely on their (and his) performance.

“You’ll get to swim all the time!” laughed Nagisa. “Wouldn’t that be great, Haru-chan?”

“It would,” conceded Haru, stealing a glance at Makoto, whose eyes bore guiltily into the sand. Haruka tensed and turned his head. Were they needlessly pressuring Makoto with all this nonsense about regionals, when it wasn’t even certain any of them would quality…?

Rei had stopped to look at Makoto as well, and after a moment’s consideration, he walked over and offered the kickboard with a smile.

“Here, Makoto-san,” he said in a gentle tone. “It is your turn for our final kilometer.”

“Final..?” asked Makoto, his brow creasing. Rei let out a small, nervous laugh.

“I believe all of us are getting tired, and straining our muscles on our very first day would be unwise,” he explained, careful not to make it seem as though Makoto or himself were the ones in desperate need of cutting the regimen short. “We should all swim back to the campsite and eat before it gets dark. I believe it is our wisest choice.”

“Aww? But I wanted to swim some more!” whined Nagisa. Rei gave him a sharp look.

“You will have one more kilometer to swim, Nagisa-kun,” he said in a stern tone. “You will just have to make the best of that.”

“Fine, fine, no need to be grouchy, you know!”

“ _I’m not grouchy!_ ”

“Let’s head back, then,” said Haru as he pulled his goggles into place. Makoto followed his example.

“I guess it would be nice to have dinner soon,” he said despite the anxious churning of his stomach, abundantly sorry that Nagisa and Haru wouldn’t get to swim to their hearts’ content because of him.

“Yeah, I’m starving..!” moaned Nagisa, making a show of rubbing at his empty belly. Rei cleared his throat.

“Let us head back to the campsite, then!” he said, and with that, they broke into their final spurt down the beach until the finally arrived at a spot where they were facing the tents directly. Although none of them said so out loud, Haruka and Rei had since learned from Makoto’s first leg of backstroke. From that point onward, they had been searching carefully for entry points that would allow Makoto to just swim in a straight line towards his goal, and when he finally caught on, Makoto was thankful, if a little embarrassed by the extra effort put forth solely for his sake.

* * *

While the four of them were tackling their second circuit, Ama-chan and Kou sorted out the pressing issue of dinner. Kou eventually agreed to stay and guard the tents, while Ama-chan walked back to the lodge, where she baked enough pizzas for their entire group, and sorted out everything from drinks to cutlery. Kou expected both her advisor and the boys to take a long time, which gave rise to temptation to wander off on her own, but when the four swimmers started heading back towards the campsite, she instead produced some towels from the storage tent so she could greet them properly.

“Welcome back, everyone!” she said in a cheerful tone as she handed out towels for each of them. “Good work!”

Rei wiped his face, then adjusted his goggles with a smirk.

“Thank you, Kou-san,” he said as he straightened and slapped his hands on his hips. “I believe we did very well!”

“I didn’t expect you to come back so soon, though,” mused Kou. “Was the training regimen too hard after all? You guys only completed half of it.”

Rei swallowed and his hand slipped upward to fix his goggles, but Nagisa gave him an encouraging smack on his tanned back. Rei let out a yelp. Even Makoto winced, his own back feeling more and more prickly where the sun had scotched him, but his heart sinking all the more when he thought of how much he had been to blame for the subpar performance of the entire group.

“Now, now, Kou-chan, it’s only our first day after all!” said Nagisa in a soothing tone. Makoto tensed and walked a little closer.

“I’ll do better tomorrow!” he blurted in a thick voice. Haru quirked his brow.

“You’re doing just fine, Mako-chan!” said Nagisa with a small wave of his hand.

“No.. but I will work harder, I promise,” replied Makoto at once. Haruka sighed.

“You did well. You’ll be fine,” he said out loud as he looked Makoto calmly in the eye, but his friend failed to smile, and by the time he opened his mouth to reply, Ama-chan’s voice rang across the beach and stole everyone’s attention.

“Hey, everyone! That’s enough performance reviews for now. Let’s eat before it gets dark!” said their advisor as she walked up to the large wooden platform by the stone stairs, placing two well-stuffed plastic bags on the table in the middle. One of the bags appeared to be steaming softly from a hefty stack of fresh-baked pizzas.

“Finally..! I’m _starving!_ ” cried Nagisa as they hurried over, but as soon as Ama-chan looked into the bag that seemed to hold some bottled drinks, she let out a surprised squeak.

“Oh no, I forgot to bring seasoning!”

“What?!” wailed Nagisa as if the world was ending.

Before disappointment might dampen their evening for good, Kou stepped forward and offered to borrow some seasoning from the lodge. Ama-chan thanked her for the offer with a relieved smile. Kou asked for everyone’s patience, then broke into a run back up the stone steps, cheered on by an audibly starving Nagisa.

* * *

The lodge wasn’t very far. Within minutes, Kou was rushing down the main road that led past the convenience store and straight to their lodge, but as she hurried past the store, the door opened and Kou nearly collided with the student stepping outside.

“S-Sorry!” said Kou immediately, but when she looked up, she froze and so did Nitori Aiichiro, whose eyes widened in realization.

“You— you are Matsuoka-senpai’s…” he started to say, only for Rin to step outside a moment later.

“What’s wrong?” came his voice from behind Nitori. Kou’s eyes now flitted to him in surprise.

“Onii-chan!”

“Gou..?” uttered Rin in shock. He gritted his teeth a moment later, but a quick glance above Kou’s head confirmed his sister was on her own, with no meddling, obnoxious childhood acquaintances to be seen. His brow creased and his face darkened considerably, but his voice sounded softer as he said,

“Nitori, you head back first.”

“O-Oh… okay,” came the small, reluctant reply. “Matsuoka-senpai..?”

“What is it?”

“I’ll carry our bags back to the hotel,” said Aiichiro, reaching out his hand to take the plastic bag Rin was holding, as he had divided their purchases equally while Nitori paid the cashier.

“Fine,” said Rin with a sigh, handing it over for Nitori to gather to his other bag. His kouhai then left the siblings in slow, tentative steps, evidently disappointed he had to make the journey on his own. Kou stared after him with sheepish looks, until her brother’s sharp glare could no longer be ignored.

“We need to talk,” said Rin in a low tone, and Kou nodded without a word.

* * *

The grocery store looked upon a paved park dotted with wooden benches. That was where they headed and Rin soon singled out a bench on the left side, throwing himself down on its wooden seat with one leg flung over his knee. Kou settled down next to him, turning sideways to face her brother.

“It’s not what you’re thinking,” she began in an exasperated tone.

“It’s not?” scoffed Rin. “But Haru and the rest are here, right?”

Kou nodded with flushed cheeks.

“They are. But it’s purely coincidence!” she replied, the look on her face so earnest that Rin found it increasingly harder to suspect her of meddling like she had done before. “We happen to be here for a training camp.”

Nothing could have been more natural than the explanation Kou had given him. There was no other reason for Haru and the swim club to come here in the middle of the first trimester except to train for prefecturals, yet Rin was still stunned when the words registered. He gave Kou a confused look.

“Training camp? We’re the ones using the pool, so where are _they_ swimming?”

Kou lowered her head sheepishly, wondering if the swim club would have fared better with a nice indoor pool to practice in. She was no longer sure if the ocean really was their best option in comparison, but there was no turning back now.

“The ocean,” she said quietly. Rin’s eyes widened.

“Even Rei..? How do they expect him to keep afloat?” he blurted, regretting his words the moment Kou turned to him with a look of pleasant surprise. Rin flinched into a frown and turned his head.

“Never mind,” he said, wondering if Rei had gotten better since the last time he saw him swim. “Are they completing their regimen?”

“Uh huh… Well, they only finished half of it today,” replied Kou, unable to hold in her giggles at Onii-chan’s careful questions. Rin turned back to shoot her a sour look.

“ _What?_ ”

“Nothing,” said Kou as she broke into a hopeful smile. “Sounds like you’re still worried about them..!”

Rin tensed. “I’m not.”

“But you promised to meet them at prefecturals, right?” pressed Kou. Rin’s face grew hard and reserved in reply, until his gaze fell heavily to the pavement.

“I didn’t do it to see them,” he said in a low sneer. “I’m going to beat Haru. That’s all I care about.”

He then rose to his feet, as if he had already wasted too much time. With a few steps, he left the bench, heading back towards the convenience store at a slow, even pace. Kou was now free to return to the lodge for seasoning, but she slumped against the bench in disappointment, shoulders hunched and feet unwilling to carry her away as though nothing had happened. Rin stopped and glanced behind his back. He turned back to face forward right after.

“Gou.”

Kou stirred on the bench behind him. Rin closed his eyes.

“Where are you staying?”

“Oh, the lodge further up the road,” came the subdued reply. Rin sighed.

“I’ll walk you back,” he said with another glance, then carried on towards the street. He half expected Kou to mope for his not caring about the others, but his sister let out a laugh that sounded too giddy, then hurried over to catch up with him. She flashed Rin her sweetest smile. He turned his head firmly to the road.

“What’s that smile for?”

Kou giggled, hands clasped behind her back as she fell into rhythm by her brother’s side.

“No reason.”

“ _Right.._ ”


	27. EPISODE 5: Trial in Open Water! - Part 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> True to his word, Rin walked his sister to the lodge, then headed back to his hotel room, leaving Kou to gather the seasoning Ama-chan had left behind and return to the beach posthaste. In the meantime, the boys lined up in front of the empty tent to exchange their wet and clingy swimsuits for more comfortable dry shorts and t-shirts. Nagisa scampered inside to be first. Haruka stepped behind Makoto to be fourth, but the back he had calmly fixed his eyes on soon shifted out of his view.

“You can change before me, Haru,” said Makoto, his hands lightly clasped together. Haru lowered his eyes. He paused, and after a moment’s hesitation, he walked into the storage tent, then came back with a tube of what looked like some sort of ointment.

“Makoto.”

“Huh?”

Haruka held out the gel tube for him to see, careful not to look him in the eye.

“Aloe vera. ..For sunburns.”

“A-Aah…” came the surprised reply, and though the gel was within easy reach, Makoto did not take it. Haru tensed.

“I’ll put some on your back,” he said quietly. Makoto uttered a sheepish _Thank you_.

Having obtained Makoto’s consent, Haru walked around him to spread small globs of gel over the reddish patches of Makoto’s back. His freckles had darkened a little over his final kilometer, now standing out against his skin like a myriad of tiny brown stars, so many that Haru kept losing track of their growing numbers as he gently massaged the aloe vera into Makoto’s aching skin.

“Thank you, Haru,” said Makoto with an awkward smile once Haruka stepped in front of him again. “I guess I should go to the restroom now to put some on my face, since I have no mirror with me…”

Haruka pursed his lips.

“..No need,” he replied in a thick tone, and after squeezing some gel onto the tips of his fingers, he lifted his hand to spread it gingerly over the red blotches on Makoto’s cheeks. Makoto screwed his eyes shut instinctively as that hand started hovering near them, and Haru was more than glad for it, his own face having colored considerably in the effort. Nagisa kept grinning at him, which Haruka did his best to ignore, a little resentful that his displays of what he felt was camaraderie were apparently worthy of ridicule. Rei at least turned out to be more considerate, even approving of the captain’s positive attentions to a hard-working beginner, and when he stepped out after changing, he proceeded to tell Haruka just that.

“I’m glad to see you are devoting so much time to the well-being of our latest member, Haruka-senpai!” he said to the flushed captain in a warm, earnest tone, turning to Makoto next and promptly missing the face Haru made in response. “And you have performed well considering it was your first time, Makoto-san. How do you feel?”

“I uh.. I’m happy, I guess,” replied Makoto with a small, nervous laugh. Haruka paused, then held out the gel tube for Makoto to take, unsure if he could justify its application to areas Makoto could clearly see and manage himself. Makoto thanked him. Haru hummed and walked off.

“Are you tired, Makoto-san?” continued Rei.

“Yeah..” mumbled Makoto, but his smile was still in place. Rei let out a sigh of relief.

“We shall eat and sleep soon,” he assured Makoto with a smirk. He gave his glasses a smart push and continued to say, “I’m certain that once we are well-rested, we will perform even better than we have today! Three whole circuits a day will not be out of our reach for long! Gyaaa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-haaa!”

“Yeah…” sighed Makoto, his eyes drifting over to Haruka as the other entered the tent to undress, going before Makoto just so his skin would have more time to absorb the gel Haru had so painstakingly rubbed into it.

* * *

Upon Kou’s return, who was welcomed with great enthusiasm and gurgles of hunger, everyone was allowed to have a pizza each, and to add a few toppings of their choosing, including some of the mackerel Haru had brought with him. Nagisa was more than happy to take some, dotting his slices with small chunks of hokke in a neat circle, while Haruka simply piled three larger pieces of mackerel into the very middle and topped them off with a ring of pineapple, receiving mixed responses from the others.

“Ew…” cringed Kou. Even Makoto looked put off, and though he said nothing of Haruka’s choice of toppings, Haru gave him a hard look for his evident betrayal.

“Pineapple’s the one topping I’ll never put on pizza,” said Ama-chan, shaking her head a little in disapproval, but Haru merely turned his head and pulled out a slice to eat. It came loose without any mackerel or pineapple on top, just as Haruka had intended when he put all of it in the middle, where it would gather into a mound for him to eat after. Since he wouldn’t join the conversation that started off with a grave insult to mackerel and pineapple, Kou carried on in his place with a list of foods she personally disliked, but unfortunately for her, she and Ama-chan did not see eye to eye on the terrible combination of green peas in pork gyoza.

A little further away, Makoto picked out a plain cheese pizza. He nibbled his slices slowly, face distant and eyes lowered to the ground. Nagisa quirked an eyebrow at him, soon breaking away from the others to walk over and join him.

“Something wrong, Mako-chan?” he asked in a kind tone, and Makoto found himself putting on a smile not to give cause for any alarm.

“Oh, no, not at all,” he said with a small sideways tilt of his head.

“Really? That’s good,” replied Nagisa with a grin, then turned away the next moment to join the others again, his place almost immediately taken by Rei.

“Enjoy your meal, Makoto-san,” he said with a pleasant smile. Makoto nodded.

“You too, Rei.”

“And please, don’t worry about today,” continued Rei over a slice of pepperoni pizza. “After having grown so accustomed to short distances, none of us were quite prepared for long-distance swimming, but I am certain you will do better and better every day! Just keep up the hard work, Makoto-san, and you will make yourself and the swim club very proud!”

Although Rei intended his words as encouragement, all Makoto felt was the uncertainty of his performing any better the next day, or even by the end of the week. He bit his tongue though, not wanting to seem ungrateful for Rei’s kindness or belittle the faith invested in his improvement.

“Ah.. I will,” he replied quietly, forcing another smile.

“That’s the spirit, Makoto-san!” said Rei, perfectly relieved and silently congratulating himself on having managed to bolster Makoto’s spirit with his vice-captainly wisdom. He soon turned around and joined the larger group, which had grown progressively louder with Nagisa’s inclusion, then lost little more than an idle listener when Haruka left it to go and stand next to Makoto.

“Are you alright?” he asked as he pulled out another slice from underneath a fat wedge of mackerel. Makoto paused.

“I am, Haru,” he said at last, his smile not as bright as he had showed Nagisa and Rei, but a little more sincere than before. “Thank you.”

Haru hummed, unsure what he was being thanked for, and even less sure of what else he could say to keep the conversation going, so the two of them continued to eat side by side in silence, until their pizzas, and even the mackerel and pineapple were gone.

After dinner, everyone took turns to go and wash their hands at the restroom. Haru and Makoto were the last to do so, and as they walked back towards the stone stairs leading to the tents, Makoto clenched his fist in determination.

“Haru..” he began, immediately commanding Haruka’s full attention.

“What is it?” he asked, careful to match Makoto’s slow pace so he could tell him everything he wanted, no matter how long it took.

“I uh.. I was wondering if we could—”

“Haru-chan, Mako-chan, _hurry up!_ ” cried Nagisa before Makoto could finish. Though Haru shot Nagisa a glare and turned back to Makoto all ears, the other simply shrugged and said _Never mind_ with a hapless smile.

“Haruka-senpai, Makoto-san, it is time to choose tents for the night,” Rei informed them as they drew nearer.

“I want to be in the orange tent!” said Nagisa with his hand in the air. Rei scoffed.

“Nagisa-kun, I do believe we should let Makoto-san pick first since the tents belong to him.”

“Oh, no, it’s fine,” laughed Makoto as he rubbed at the nape of his neck. “Nagisa can sleep in the orange tent if he wants to. I was thinking that Haru and I might take the green tent…” he added, lowering his head with a troubled smile. Haruka’s eyes widened. He opened his mouth to say _Sure_ , but he was interrupted once again by Nagisa.

“Whaaat? But _I_ wanna sleep with Mako-chan!” he moaned with puppy eyes. Rei gave him a hard look.

“Are you saying you don’t want to be in a tent with me?”

“Well, you always squirm and kick me in your sleep, Rei-chan.”

“ _I do not!_ That’s _you_ , Nagisa-kun!” snapped Rei an inch from Nagisa’s face, but quickly straightened and adjusted his glasses with a frown. “But if you insist, we will decide the question through luck of the draw. Any ideas for a fair and efficient method?”

“We could use amida,” suggested Makoto, as calmly as his pending disappointment allowed.

“Amida it is.”

“We can draw in the sand,” said Haruka, who shook his head in defeat, then proceeded to smooth out a patch of sand with his foot so they could draw lines in it.

“I’m on the far right!” declared Nagisa.

“Ah! That’s the one _I_ wanted!” cried Rei.

“Now, now,” said Makoto in a soothing tone. “Which one are you taking, Haru?”

“The one on the end.”

The horizontal lines had shown the way, and as if to laugh in the face of everyone’s preferences, Nagisa ended up with Haru, while Makoto was to bunk with Rei.

“Oh well, Haru-chan it is then!” cheered Nagisa, who began chanting _A-mi-da, a-mi-da!_ just to tease Rei. Their advisor and manager were watching from some ways away, and now that the tents had been sorted out, Ama-chan turned to Kou with a smile.

“Let’s head back to the lodge, Matsuoka-san.”

“Oh, yes,” replied Kou, but when Nagisa’s next chant of _O-range tent, o-range tent!_ hit her ears, she turned back one more time to look at the others. Haruka seemed to have accepted his fate with a dull look, and Rei was bickering with Nagisa, but when the argument ended in laughter, she couldn’t help but wonder why Onii-chan had thrown such wonderful friends away, to be bitter and morose at Samezuka Academy.

* * *

Once everything had been sorted from tent arrangements to their morning schedule, Makoto entered their freshly designated tent to hand out Haruka and Nagisa’s bags. They were duly deposited in the orange tent so the green tent could cease to be storage space, and ready to accommodate Makoto and Rei for the night. All four said their _good nights_ and _sleep wells_ before retreating into their respective tents, but the moment he lay down on his side in the orange tent, Haruka turned sharply away from Nagisa. He couldn’t take his mind off Makoto. What did his friend try to tell him before he was interrupted? Was it about sharing a tent? Or was it something else, something more serious, more pressing perhaps? It might not have been urgent if Makoto didn’t insist on telling him afterwards, but having seen him break into pieces before he finally opened up that one day of practice, Haru could no longer be so sure. There was something not quite right about Makoto that he still couldn’t put his finger on, and the idea that he might have found out had Nagisa not interfered pulled Haru’s face into an acrid frown.

His discontent was so obvious Nagisa didn’t even have to see his face to feel it. Haru could hear him squirm about as he searched for the right position, until Nagisa settled for curling up with his duffel bag, his arms and leg wrapped around it snugly for comfort.

“Good night, Haru-chan.”

“Night,” muttered Haru. There was a light rustle of the mat behind his back.

“Funny how we both got foiled, huh?” spoke Nagisa after a short pause. “I thought at least one of us would get to sleep with Mako-chan, but now Rei-chan is the lucky one,” he continued with a light giggle. Haru clenched his jaw.

“Why did you want to sleep with Makoto?” he found himself asking, regretting it instantly as Nagisa’s laughter grew, then trailed off into silence.

“Mako-chan seemed a little down after all that swimming, so I thought I’d tell him jokes to cheer him up,” he said in a quiet tone that had none of his usual teasing or cheerful artifice. “And Rei-chan told me over dinner how he wanted to discuss our regimen with you since, in his words, _Haruka-senpai is the captain, after all_ ,” he added, his imitation of Rei surprisingly spot on this time. “So I thought he could go sleep with you then.”

Haru sighed, his eyes boring into space. Nagisa let out a yawn.

“But I guess you wanted to sleep with Mako-chan more, huh, Haru-chan?” he continued in a soft, sleepy tone that nonetheless had a playful edge to it. “He is your best friend, after all. I bet he’s really nice to sleep with.. Large bodies give off more heat, so he must be nice and warm even on cold nights, and his nose is pretty straight so he probably doesn’t snore! Ah, but what if he hogs the blankets or sprawls out all over the place? He’s really strong so you can’t just pry the blankets away from him, and he might squish you if he rolled over…”

Haru tensed and bit his lip. Nagisa chuckled.

“Oh, that reminds me, Haru-chan,” he said, sounding more animated. “Here’s a joke I wanted to tell Mako-chan. What do you call a penguin in a desert?”

“What?”

“Lost!” cried Nagisa, squealing with laughter. “Get it?! It’s _lost,_ Haru-chan!”

Haru didn’t reply, but the look on his face could have leveled mountains.

* * *

While Nagisa proceeded to entertain Haru with more penguin jokes of the kind, laughing himself silly in the effort, Rei and Makoto settled down comfortably in their own tent. Rei lay on his back with his eyes fixed on the taut green ceiling, and Makoto on his side, mostly to spare his chest and back from further pain.

“Good night, Makoto-san,” said Rei when his neighbor stopped moving.

“Good night, Rei,” replied Makoto.

A pause. Rei pursed his lips.

“Makoto-san..”

“Yes, Rei?”

“I would like you to know that what Nagisa-kun said about my sleeping habits is an utter lie,” blurted Rei, unable to hold it in anymore. “I don’t squirm or kick in my sleep, so you do not have to fear any sudden and unwanted physical contact during the night.”

“A-Aah..” came the surprised reply. “I uh, I wasn’t really afraid of that,” said Makoto. He hardly knew what he expected to hear from the vice-captain, but this certainly wasn’t it. Rei let out a small, nervous laugh. He cleared his throat.

“Yes, well, at least now you know, Makoto-san, so please don’t give too much credit to Nagisa-kun’s more negative assertions about me. He sometimes tends to exaggerate or twist the facts for his own amusement, you see…” said Rei, his features relaxing into blankness.

A few minutes passed by. A gust of wind pressed against the wall of the tent.

“Makoto-san..?”

Makoto creased his brow, drawing his blanket a little more around himself. “Yes, Rei?”

“What do _you_ think of Nagisa-kun?”

“..Eh?” blinked Makoto, who carefully shifted onto his other side.

“How do you see Nagisa-kun as your— as a person?”

Makoto stared. Rei’s cheeks looked rather hot despite the cool evening air around them.

“I um… I suppose he is a good friend,” said Makoto at last. Rei’s rolled his head over to him at once.

“A good _friend,_ you say?” he echoed, his tone gently urging. Makoto cracked a smile.

“He was kind to me when I was struggling to swim,” he explained, “and he is a cheerful person, so he’s fun to be around.”

“Yes…” spoke Rei, his tone softening considerably. “Nagisa-kun certainly is one of a kind… even if he sometimes says outrageous things, and he has an unhealthy addiction to Iwatobi Cream Bread and his manners are terrible and he drives you _crazy_ with his wild ideas,” he blurted in one breath with his voice growing progressively louder. “But.. at the same time, he has a pure heart and he’s smarter than people give him credit for, and he can be very motivational because he always pushes forward and aims high no matter the circumstances, and I think that’s really.. beautiful…” he finished with a small sigh.

Makoto chuckled, his smile growing fonder as Rei went on.

“You sound like you have known Nagisa for a long time,” he hazarded to guess, having realized he hardly knew anything about the others from before the time he had met them. Rei broke into a distant smile.

“I’ve known him since I was nine years old,” he said quietly. “We met at the Iwatobi Swimming Club while I was learning how to swim. I nearly gave up when I discovered I couldn’t float no matter how hard I tried, but Nagisa-kun told me I could do it because.. _Because I was Ryuugazaki-kun_ , whatever that means. He was the only one who believed in me.”

“Ah..” said Makoto, his eyes gleaming in the dark. Rei hesitated.

“I.. I suppose that, in that respect, Haruka-senpai fills a similar role in your life, Makoto-san,” he said slowly, and when Makoto twitched but said nothing to the contrary, Rei cautiously continued. “Although you have only known each other for a few months, you seem to be closer every day, and even though you couldn’t swim when we recruited you, he believed in you, and he was right..”

Makoto’s eyes grew larger, his throat too tight to answer. Rei turned back to the ceiling with a smile.

“I guess we’re agreed on that,” he said in a louder voice, sounding rather cheerful that he understood Makoto-san so well and Makoto-san understood his own feelings in return.

“Y-Yeah,” mumbled Makoto. Rei’s smile grew a little wider.

“Excellent..!” he replied as though their conversation had been a successful swim club discussion, rather than a heart-to-heart talk about relationships. He then rolled onto his side with a content sigh, now facing away from Makoto. “Let’s sleep now, Makoto-san, we have a lot of work ahead of us tomorrow!”

“Yeah… Good night, Rei. Sleep well,” said Makoto, shifting back onto his other side.

“Sleep well, Makoto-san,” replied Rei, and a few minutes later, Makoto could hear faint snoring from behind his back.

* * *

A few hours passed in relative silence, but try as he might, Makoto couldn’t join Rei in the blissful world of dreams. He screwed his eyes shut, rolled to his other side and back, draped the blanket over his head and pulled his legs to his chest, but each time he began to drift off, another gust of wind came along to rattle the support rods and billow against the walls of the tent. Makoto had been sleeping in that tent for years. Night wind wasn’t exactly a strange phenomenon to him, but the proximity of the ocean gave it a twist that strangled his attempts to calm down and close his eyes for good. Had they set up the tents too close? What if there was a tide? Would the ocean waves wash against the tents and dislodge the support bars, drawing them further in until they all drowned in their sleep? Was that why the wind was clawing so forcefully at the tent, fueled by the rolling waves that were looming ever closer? _What if,_ _what if?!_ his brain went on and on, until Makoto finally tired of fitful squirming on the mat, with nothing but such ghoulish thoughts to keep him company. Holding his breath, he got up as silently as he could not to wake up Rei, and at length poked his head out of the tent.

A cold breeze swept past and caressed his hot cheeks, but none of his dreadful visions seemed to follow it. The ocean lay as calm as though it were no more than water in a vast bathtub, the surface glittering with the pale glow of a million stars.

Makoto stepped out of the tent and took a few steps in the silken slopes of the beach, shuffling closer to the water. He dragged his feet slightly to feel the cool trickle of sand between his toes, his eyes never leaving the water. The surface spiked with light waves while they were swimming during the day, but now it looked as smooth as liquid glass. Makoto edged a little closer and let it wash slowly across his feet, his skin tingling delightfully after the burn that had been bothering him for most of the day. A few more steps in and the water licked gently against his calves. Makoto closed his eyes, his lips twitching into a smile as he wondered if he could go in just a little further, to lie down and let the ocean caress the burns of his back while he looked at the stars overhead. After all, Haru was right. As long as he could look at the sky, Makoto did feel as though swimming might actually be fun…

Not wanting to waste such an opportunity, Makoto hurried back into the tent to pull on his legskin, glad his legs had been spared from the sun and didn’t protest the tight hug of damp fabric against them. Rei seemed to be a heavy sleeper. Makoto listened to his soft snores for a moment, then sighed in relief. He would only be gone for a little while, and now had hopes that his midnight dip might go completely unnoticed if Rei continued to sleep as soundly as he did now.

Makoto soon folded his t-shirt and shorts, leaving them on his side. He was ready. He would go into the ocean just for a little while, to make a good memory of floating in peace and gazing at the stars. Perhaps after that, he might be able to get over himself at last, and become the confident swimmer everyone wanted him to be.

The ocean felt wonderfully cool as he slipped in far enough to roll onto his back, and Makoto could have wept with joy as the sensation spread over his back and small waves of water lapped at his tender chest. He drew an arm backwards, then the other, over and over, eyes wide as he drifted under the most stunning night sky he had ever seen, a sky that lent its shine to the water all around Makoto.

 _Beautiful…_ he thought to himself, thinking less and less about the water, and even himself as his arms and legs continued to sweep and paddle across the surface, almost of their own accord. The view continued to change as Makoto glided, and before he realized, he had moved a fair distance from the shore, his whole face glowing in a mesmerized smile..

…a smile that disappeared the moment a burst of dark clouds spread across the sky and the breeze swelled into a strong, stormy wind, tearing at the branches of trees and whipping water and foam against the rocks, water that swept over him in forceful waves, _no, nO, NO—_

Makoto whirled onto his stomach instinctively to crawl back towards the shore, burrowing against the water that kept throwing him backwards, as though he were no more than flotsam upon the tide. A hard splash filled his mouth with salt water. The tents shrank to small blots of color on the horizon, far beyond Makoto’s desperate reach.

“Help! _Somebody… HELP..!_ ” he spluttered as rain started pouring over him, each drop an icy needle against his scalp, and the roaring ocean clutching him in a stranglehold Makoto was too weak to break.

* * *

As soon as rain started plinking furiously against the tent, Rei stirred and opened his eyes, fumbling for his glasses. He put them on, then turned over to Makoto’s side, to find it empty.

“Huh? Makoto-san…?” he mumbled, still half asleep. He faintly wondered if he was only dreaming, but when he finally shuffled to his feet and stepped outside, the cold downpour of rain doused him wide awake. He immediately turned back into the tent, but that empty mat wasn’t a dream – it was the onset of a nightmare.

 _Why did Makoto-san go out in this rain?_ he wondered as he stepped outside to look around… then froze in horror. A huge streak of lightning came crashing down, illuminating the rolling ocean beneath it and there, in the middle of the water in the distance, a small figure was thrashing to escape the waves that towered over it like mountains.

“ _H-Help!_ ” howled Makoto, blinded and choked by salt-water. Rei’s heart skipped a beat.

“ _Makoto-san!_ ” he cried, whipping his head from Makoto to the tents and making a dash for his own, to skid to a halt by the entrance in panic. What should he do? He had to go and save Makoto, he could get the kickboard— _No..!_ He could’t just run off on his own, what if they both drowned because Rei couldn’t do anything but hold onto the kickboard to stay afloat? He needed help, _right now…_

“Haruka-senpai!” screamed Rei as he scrambled to the orange tent and threw its entrance wide open. “ _Haruka-senpai!_ ”

 

**_TO BE CONTINUED…_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 


	28. EPISODE 6: Shocking No Breathing! - Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once Nagisa had worn himself out “entertaining” Haruka, he murmured _Good night_ and promptly fell asleep with a grin on his face, leaving Haru tired and dissatisfied, except for the idea that he had at least spared Makoto from over a dozen terrible penguin jokes, some of which were far more elaborate than their flimsy punchlines warranted. He closed his eyes and stayed still until he could finally make out the soft rumble of the ocean, so soothing in its fluid rhythm it soon lulled Haruka into a deep, peaceful slumber. Nothing could disturb him, not even the brush of Nagisa’s arm against his back when the other rolled over in his sleep and sprawled out across their mats, the sharp blow of the wind, or the hard fall of rain upon the tent.

Until…

_Makoto-san!_

Nagisa’s eyes blinked open at once. He lifted his head drowsily to look around, his hand knocking against Haru’s shoulder hard enough to stir him awake.

“Did you hear that, Haru-chan..?” he mumbled half awake. Haru stared. “Sounded like..”

“ _Haruka-senpai!_ ” came the voice again, much louder this time, and the next moment, the entrance of the tent flew wide open to reveal Rei standing over them, pale, trembling, and soaking wet.

“ _Haruka-senpai!_ Haruka-senpai, you have come at once, it’s terrible,” he cried. Haruka twitched upright at once.

“What is it?” he asked, his insides twisting in fear.

“It’s Makoto-san, he’s out in the ocean—”

“ _What?!_ ”

Haruka sprung onto his feet and rushed past Rei, pushing him roughly to the side. He quickly lifted an arm over his eyes, trying to block out the merciless torrent of rain as he searched the horizon for any sign of Makoto. Behind him, Nagisa threw off his blanket, taking Rei’s hand and letting his friend pull him up and out of the tent.

“Why is Mako-chan in the ocean?!” demanded Nagisa, his voice hysterical. Rei’s hands curled into trembling fists.

“I don’t know,” he stammered, “I never noticed him leaving, I just realized, but I couldn’t, I couldn’t go after him, _I can’t float—_ ”

A deafening roar of thunder cut him off, lighting up the sky just enough to spread light on a small dark figure in the distance, who now seemed on the verge of drowning. Makoto no longer moved of his own accord. All Haru could make out from afar was a head that dipped lower into the water until a large wave splashed over it, and the next moment, it was gone…

Haruka broke into a sprint towards the ocean, yanking off his shirt and throwing it to the wind as he rushed into the water.

“Haru-chan!” Nagisa called after him wide-eyed. Rei stood frozen beside him, his lips parting in a silent scream.

“Contact Amakata-sensei!” shouted Haru as he dove into the waves and started swimming frantically towards the spot where he had last seen Makoto. Nagisa’s eyes grew larger, but his features hardened into fierce determination. Before Rei could so much as move, Nagisa made a dash towards the water to follow Haruka.

“Wait! Hold on, Haru-chan!” he howled as he threw away his own shirt and jumped into the ocean. “It’s not safe to go in alone!”

Rei was the only one standing on the shore now, staring after Nagisa completely paralyzed, but his mind kept whirling furiously. The moment he grasped that his friends were all in grave danger, and running off to warn Amakata Miho would mean leaving them behind, Rei let out a cry of anguish and tore his shirt off, running back to the tent at last to grab his kickboard. If he was going to be useless, so be it, but he wouldn’t abandon his friends anymore. Not rushing in the moment he had noticed Makoto to save him was already bad enough. If the others died for his failure, he would never forgive himself...

“ _Nagisa-kun!_ ” he shouted as he held out the kickboard and charged the waves, keeping his eyes on the others as he paddled with all his might. “Nagisa-kun, it’s _dangerous!_ ”

Haruka and Nagisa had gained on him considerably by the time Rei started advancing in earnest, both swimming steadily towards the spot where Haru hoped Makoto would emerge again. There was still no sign of him anywhere, not even by the white glow of lightning, but as the water began to dip deep and then swell again, the rising tide pulled something upward: a large clump of dark hair above a white face full of spots…

“ _Makoto!_ ” cried Haruka, launching forward to burst below the surface. He made a desperate dash towards Makoto until his arms bumped against his cold, sinking body. Haruka circled him under the arms and pulled his friend up and out of the water, terribly conscious of how heavy and motionless Makoto felt in his hold. His head fell limply against Haru’s shoulder. Nagisa’s eyes were burning wet.

“I’ll get Rei-chan!” he shouted, and Haru could only nod as Nagisa whirled around to unite with Rei, who was still heading towards them with his kickboard held forward. His grasp on it slipped more and more as the waves kept lashing at him. Nagisa was still trying to close the distance when Haruka tightened his hold around Makoto and steered himself around to join them, freezing mid-turn as his eyes fell on a dark wall of waves looming behind the others.

“Rei-chan, I’m coming!” he heard Nagisa as his friend reached Rei with a final spurt, but just as he and Rei threw an arm around each other and Nagisa latched onto the kickboard with his free hand, the wave that had been towering above them came crashing down with a thunderous splash.

“No way..!” blurted Nagisa, eyes large and jaw hanging in horror as the two of them were buried underneath, the water collapsing with so much force it hurled Haruka and Makoto far away from them, towards the empty shores of Sukishima.

* * *

As Nagisa and Rei plunged deep beneath the surface, the kickboard they had latched onto was torn from their hands by a strong current, spinning rapidly out of their reach. Rei stared after it in horror, but Nagisa tugged at him hard. The two started clawing their way up the water, until Nagisa managed to drag them both to the surface.

Haruka and Makoto had since disappeared, their trail washed away by the storm. All Nagisa and Rei could see upon their reemergence was the dank yellow of the kickboard as it continued to drift steadily towards the stretch of ocean between the two islands nearby. With their friends gone, but the kickboard still in sight, they now had no choice but to follow it, and hopefully reclaim it before breaking out of the ocean to either island within reach.

“You have to let go, Nagisa-kun,” breathed Rei, his face contorting painfully as he continued to kick his feet to keep his head above the water. “You have a better chance of staying afloat without me..!”

“I’m not letting you go, Rei-chan!” snapped Nagisa, his eyes fixed on the kickboard. “So help me and start swimming butterfly!”

“Butterfly..?”

“Just do half a butterfly and don’t let go!” cried Nagisa, and to show Rei what he meant, he gripped the other tightly around his back and beneath his arm, pulling his free arm forward as though he were swimming a lopsided front crawl. Rei took a deep breath, held tightly onto Nagisa’s side, then drew his arm forward the moment Nagisa’s arm came back out behind him, sweeping through the water with just enough force not to break their hold over each other and to propel their bodies forward. Nagisa began paddling his feet while Rei broke into a steady dolphin kick, their strokes mismatched yet soon moving together in near-fluid motion. Their arms continued to swing in alternation, legs kicking in synch until they managed to tug each other out of the current and towards a rocky stretch of shore, on the left side of the island they could only guess was Sukishima.

They didn’t let go, not even when they finally reached the shore, where Rei planted his feet on the bottom, pulling Nagisa along until the other could stand and start running towards the beach with Rei. Both of them were trembling from the joint effort by the time they reached the sand, and all but crawled over to the moss-covered logs strewn around the shore. When they reached it, Rei let go of Nagisa at last to sink down and bury his face in his hands. Nagisa hesitated. They were still missing the kickboard.

“Wait here, Rei-chan,” he panted, giving the other’s shoulder a quick pat. He then turned around and hurried back to the water, looking around for any sign of the renegade flotation device. After a few minutes, luck smiled on Nagisa. Just as he was ready to turn around, a large wave rolled towards them, carrying the kickboard that soon washed up by the rocks. Nagisa broke into a tired smile as he reached down to pluck it out of the water, brushing off the seaweed that had clung to its yellow underside before making his way back to Rei. He found his friend exactly as he had left him, shoulders hunched and face hidden in his hands.

“Here, Rei-chan,” said Nagisa softly, holding out the kickboard for Rei to take. Rei lifted his gaze just long enough to reach out and relieve Nagisa of his burden, then hung his head again, his hands falling limply into his lap.

“Thank you very much.”

“Are you alright?”

“I am..” sighed Rei, his throat tight as he added, “I’m so sorry about this.”

“Huh? You didn’t do anything wrong,” replied Nagisa, but Rei’s features tensed savagely as he lifted his head to look the other in the eye.

“How do you know that, Nagisa-kun?” he said in a hard tone. Nagisa blinked. “How do you know I’m not responsible one way or another?”

“But you did the right thing, Rei-chan,” said Nagisa, his brow quirked in confusion. “You warned us just in time for Haru-chan to go in and save Mako-chan!”

“Yes, but Nagisa-kun, why was Makoto-san swimming in the ocean in first place?” replied Rei, his face scrunching up. “Why would a beginner do something so dangerous without telling me or anyone else? Was it something I said..?”

Nagisa’s eyes widened. Rei wiped his face.

“Ever since you made me realize I had been too harsh with Makoto-san, I’ve been trying so hard to be positive and supportive,” he continued in a choked tone. “I praised him for his progress and encouraged him to strive higher, I told him all he had to do was work hard and he would make everyone proud, but what if this wasn’t the right thing to say? What if Makoto-san was so pressured by my words that he felt he had no choice but to train at night just to keep up with my ridiculous demands?”

“Rei-chan…” whispered Nagisa. Rei’s eyes were gleaming wet.

“I never meant for this to happen.. and, Nagisa-kun, I am so ashamed of myself,” he stammered, unable to look the other in the eye anymore. “When I realized Makoto-san was drowning, I wanted to rush in right away to save him, but I just couldn’t do it. I was scared that if I reached him too late and he sank below the surface, I would never be able to pull him back up and we’d both drown because I can’t float, after all these years I still need a kickboard to stay afloat… I used to be _so proud_ of myself, how I had been swimming butterfly for years and I was the vice-captain while Makoto-san was just a basic member, but how can I consider myself his mentor or superior when all I could do was beg Haruka-senpai to go in and save him? I feel so useless… Makoto-san was in trouble and I could do nothing.. no matter how good I am at butterfly, I am no longer _worthy of—_ ”

Had Nagisa let him, Rei would have continued to castigate himself, never stopping until his throat closed up and he could no longer breathe, but before Rei could batter himself down any further, Nagisa stepped closer and reached out to cup his head firmly, pressing Rei’s cheek to his cold, wet abdomen. The sudden contact stunned Rei into silence. Ever so gently, Nagisa curled one hand to Rei’s jaw line, slipping the other to the top of his head.

“You need to calm down now, Rei-chan,” he said in a quiet, serious tone as he stroked Rei’s hair. “Remember when this used to calm you down?”

Rei’s eyes widened.

_“Are you okay, Ryuugazaki-kun?” asked nine-year-old Nagisa, just minutes away from time trials for their final grade of Physical Education. The others had already gathered by the pool, but Rei was still in the locker room, his hands wringing the straps of his prescription goggles as he cowered on one of the benches._

_“N-No,” he blurted, his eyes on the blurry ground. “I’m still not as good at butterfly as the others are at front crawl, and butterfly is all I can swim. What if I’m too slow? What if I get a low grade and disappoint my parents and Mizugorou-sensei and Coach Sasabe?”_

_“You’ll do fine,” chirped Nagisa, who didn’t seem the least bit worried about his time or his performance in front of everyone. Rei was trembling at the mere thought of having to put his choppy butterfly stroke on display. It was too much, far too much to ask of him when it still wasn’t perfect and beautiful enough._

_“What if they insist I swim front crawl? What if I sink? What if I drown? What if my swimming is ugly?” he went on, but Nagisa just giggled like some heavenly cherub that had no conception of a mere mortal’s woes._

_“Do you know what you need, Ryuugazaki-kun?” he asked in a cheerful tone. Rei wiped his eyes._

_“What..?”_

_“I know a trick that’s guaranteed to calm you down!”_

_“R-Really…?”_

_“Mm-hmm!” nodded Nagisa, curling a finger and beckoning for Rei to get closer. Rei stared at Nagisa wide-eyed and leaned forward, expecting to hear a whisper of some life-changing secret passed down in the Hazuki clan for generations. What he received instead was a peck on the forehead, given by a young boy who apparently had no boundaries._

_“Wh-What are doing, Hazuki-kun?!” cried Rei indignantly as he sprung up from his seat to glare down at the smaller boy, his lips tightly pursed into a pout and cheeks as red hot as cooked lobsters. He must have been quite a sight, glowering over the other with furrowed brows and tears brimming in his eyes, yet Nagisa wouldn’t shrink away or apologize. He merely quirked his brow in anticipation._

_“Did it work?” he asked with a curious look. “Are you feeling better?”_

“Of course not!!”

_“Okay, let’s try this, then!” chirruped Nagisa, and just like that, his tiny hands pushed Rei back down on the bench with surprising ease. He then grabbed Rei’s head, pressing his cheek against Nagisa’s stomach. Rei could only let out a small yelp as one hand pressed to his other cheek and the other settled on the top of his head, caressing Rei’s hair with unexpected tenderness._

_“Whenever my sisters were mean to me, my mom would let me cuddle up with her and listen to her tummy,” said Nagisa in a low, serious tone. “Maybe_ my _tummy can calm_ you..! _”_

_Rei closed his eyes in exasperation, taking a deep breath so he could explain to Nagisa how ridiculous the notion of listening to anyone’s stomach was, but before he could so much as utter a word, Nagisa’s small belly gurgled with the loudest, most obscene roar of hunger Rei had ever heard. He froze, but a moment later, he started laughing helplessly in embarrassment, and as Nagisa laughed with him and continued to stroke the top of his head, Rei’s heart became so light it could have floated on top of the water like his body never could._

_An hour later, Rei received a good grade. He was even congratulated on setting a new best time for himself. He made his parents, Mizugorou-sensei, and Coach Sasabe proud._

_How did Nagisa even do that?_

“Why do I still find this so soothing..?” mumbled Rei in a strangled tone, halfway between sobs and laughter. Nagisa broke into a smile.

“Cause you were probably growing tired of all your nonsense, Rei-chan,” he said matter-of-factly as he continued to comb his fingers through Rei’s hair. Rei choked. “Now try and calm down, okay? Then we can go and look for Haru-chan and Mako-chan. They might be on the other side of the island, you know. I’m sure they are okay, but I’ll be glad when we find them..!”

Rei hummed in reply and pressed his face just a little more to Nagisa’s stomach, letting that gentle hand play with his hair, and half wishing it never stopped.

* * *

For a short while that felt like an eternity, the ocean tugged Haru and Makoto back and forth like a tiger playing with a couple of mice, but at last the rolling waves herded them towards the beach, just opposite their now unreachable tents. Makoto had since grown heavier than lead. He only remained afloat because Haruka refused to let go, clutching the other so fiercely his arm was going numb in the effort. Haru was kicking steadily towards the shore, no longer sparing his breath to beg Makoto to say something. The moment his feet could reach the bottom, he hoisted Makoto’s dead weight over his shoulder, dragging him out of the water and onto the beach. Haru was heaving by the time he managed to get Makoto far enough from the ocean. Once his foot sank into drier sand, he allowed himself to collapse from fatigue, Makoto’s body falling limply to the ground by his side. He landed on his back and lay there motionless while Haru struggled to catch his breath, drawing a large gulp of air to lend his voice strength as he turned to Makoto and grabbed his shoulders.

“Makoto… _Makoto!_ _Wake up!_ ” he cried as he shook his friend, but Makoto didn’t speak or stir, his eyes closed and mouth hanging slightly ajar. The freckles on his face looked black as Haru leaned closer, lowering his ear to Makoto’s mouth, but no gust of air reached his skin. Makoto wasn’t breathing.

“ _Someone…!_ ” screamed Haruka wide-eyed as he whipped his head up to look around, his voice panicked and lost like a frightened child. “Is anyone there?! Nagisa? _Rei!_ ”

When he realized there was no one around to hear him, Haruka pressed a trembling finger against his lips to think. For all he knew, Nagisa and Rei might have drowned, or drifted too far away to help him, and if he didn’t do something right now, Makoto was going to die right in front of him. Makoto, who didn’t even want to be in the swim club, but Haru forced him to join anyway, because…

. because.. . .

_You can’t get hurt in the water like that._

Oh, how his own words stung now…

 _First aid,_ he had to give first aid.. . . but what was he supposed to do..?

. ..

… _heartbeat._ As long as there was a heartbeat, Makoto would live, so Haru clenched his jaw hard to keep his teeth from chattering as he bent down to press his ear to Makoto’s chest… and heard nothing.

He waited, the silence so stark, Haru could hear every single drop of rain hurtling through the air and smashing against grains of sand or rock. He could hear the wind blow, and the ocean frothing around them. He could hear his own pulse throbbing in his ears, but there was no steady heartbeat within Makoto. All Haru could make out at last was a faint murmur, slow and quiet and ebbing away.

Haru went blank and the next moment, a string of impulses zapped across his mind.

His hands settled on Makoto’s chin and nose, jutting Makoto’s head backwards. Haru clamped his nostrils shut and gathered a breath deep enough to hurt. Air flushed into the void inside Makoto, his chest rising an inch before sinking like a deflating balloon. Haru breathed in one more time. Makoto’s chest rose a little higher, then settled again. Nothing followed. He still wasn’t breathing.

_..come on.. think… ._

_. ..chest compressions, about thirty.. at a rate of one hundred per minute._

Haruka pressed a hand to Makoto’s sternum and weighted down with the other, sickened by how easily the body yielded to the force of his weight. Was this really a flesh and blood person? Was all of this really real..?

_—two, three, four, five,_

_wake up Makoto, please wake up,_

_ten, eleven, oh please, anything but this,_

_fourteen.._

_. ..sixteen..?_

_seventeen, eighteen, nineteen,_

_Makoto I’m so sorry, now wake up, PLEASE WAKE UP,_

_twenty-five, twenty-six— twenty-..eight..? twenty.. thirty._

Haru no longer waited for a reaction. His hands shot to Makoto’s chin and nose to hold him still, pinching his nostrils shut again. He opened his mouth, gathered his breath… and the next moment, Makoto twitched onto his side and threw up salt water onto the sand, coughing helplessly until all that came out was foam and saliva. Haru released him at once. He could do nothing but stare thunderstruck while Makoto’s violent fit lasted, but when his friend stopped coughing and finally gasped for air, the ice in Haruka’s chest shattered. His own heart was racing. He did it. Makoto was breathing audibly at last…

“Makoto! ..Makoto!” cried Haruka the moment he found his voice. Makoto could just barely hear him over the fog that had descended on his mind, but turned his head, following the sound of Haru’s voice rather than his blurry vision.

“Haru..ka..?” he breathed, squinting to make out the worried face of the boy kneeling over him. He lifted a hand that fell back onto the sand. Haruka’s chest grew cold again. Did Makoto get injured? Was Haru too slow..?

“Are you okay?” he said out loud, eyes wide and features tense. Makoto rolled his head limply to the side, racking his mind in vain for an answer. He felt tired and wet. Was that what Haru meant? But they were all tired from training, so they went to sleep in the tents…

“Where are we..?” he managed to say as his right arm dragged across his side to join his left, planting his hands shakily into the sand.

“I’m guessing this is Sukishima,” replied Haru, almost glad to talk, though his mouth felt drier than parchment. “The island facing the tents.”

“Wh..Where are the others..?” asked Makoto, pushing himself upward to sit and nearly collapsing in the effort. Haruka’s hands twitched, but he still hesitated, and it was only when Makoto attempted to roll onto his knees that Haru lurched forward to press down on his shoulders.

“You shouldn’t be moving around! You need to rest!” he told him sharply to drown out the shake of his voice, but Makoto merely stared at him as though he was talking nonsense. He then pushed against Haru’s hands in another attempt to stand, grasping aimlessly at the broken strands of his memories. Why were they on Sukishima? Wasn’t he sleeping in the tent with Rei just minutes ago…?

“But, Haru, we have to go back,” he began to say, “we have to get back before Rei wakes up—”

“Rei will be fine. Nagisa managed to reach him before the wave came down,” explained Haru, his voice growing progressively louder in fear and frustration, but Makoto blinked at him confused, then worried, and finally, panicked when he managed to make sense of those words.

“N-Nagisa..? They’re in trouble..?!” he blurted, making one more push against Haruka’s hands. “We have to go and help, Haru, we—”

“I said _they’ll be_ _FINE!_ ” snapped Haruka as he shoved Makoto backwards onto the sand, his face fierce and voice loud enough to stun Makoto into silence. Haru towered over him, gripping his shoulders. “ _They will be fine!_ The one I’m worried about is _you!_ ”

“Me..?” breathed Makoto, his voice suddenly small and scared. His hands were trembling beside him. Why was Haru so angry at him..?

“Don’t you get it?!” cried Haruka, his hands tightening. “What is _wrong_ with you? _You almost drowned!_ ”

Makoto stared back at him bleakly. His eyes grew large and glassy as the barrier shattered, and a series of images flashed across his mind. Stars eaten by storm clouds, arching waves and salt water and the strangle of kelp around his throat, people marching endlessly in a great chain of never ending sorrow, dead goldfish floating in the glass bowl, two children holding hands, _the boat sank, everyone died…_

“Why did you do it, Makoto?” pressed Haruka as the nervous tumult inside him burst, his relief drowned out by confused anger. “Weeks ago you were scared to dive into a pool, and now you go off to swim in the ocean in the middle of the night without telling anyone?! By the time I dragged you out, you stopped breathing! If Rei hadn’t spotted you, you could have _died!_ I thought you knew the ocean was dangerous, I thought you had more sense than that! _What possessed you?!_ ”

Makoto’s jaw dropped, but no words came. He merely stared at Haruka in horror until Haru released him and backed off, noticing with growing shame he had squeezed Makoto’s shoulders white in his outburst. Makoto rolled onto his side and slowly rose to his feet, his eyes fixed blankly on the still raging ocean spurred by wind and rain.

“When I went in, it looked nothing like that..” he stammered. “It… _I…_ ”

By the time he could utter the first sentence, Makoto’s teeth started chattering. His fists began to tremble until convulsions seized his arms and shoulders, spreading to his jumping chest and down to his legs, until his entire body was shaking fiercely. Tears welled up in Makoto’s eyes, trickling down just as unstoppably as his tremors had come over him. Haruka’s heart jolted as time raced backwards, back to the bathroom and the dirty sink…

How could he have been so blind..?

Haruka gritted his teeth and seized Makoto’s wrist to start running, wanting nothing more than to drag his friend away from the water. Makoto stumbled after him unable to keep up, his knees buckling after a few steps and dropping him to the ground, but Haruka rushed back to his side to pull him up and hold onto him. He dragged his friend all the way to the base of the rocky hill crowning Sukishima, where a larger chunk of rock sticking out a few meters above them had formed a shallow cave protected from the rain. They crawled into its shadow and Makoto collapsed into a heap by the wall, his legs curling to his chest and arms wrapping around them to stop them from shaking. He buried his face behind his arms, shoulders quaking as Haru stood there, able to do nothing except wait for Makoto to calm down and stop crying.

He looked around silently for something, _anything_ that could help them, but the rain kept pouring down in heavy bursts as Makoto continued to convulse and sob behind the cover of his arms. Haruka watched him for a while, reaching out a tentative hand from time to time, but always withdrawing it at the last moment.

When he finally tired of his own cowardice, Haru turned his head reluctantly to the ocean. Nagisa and Rei were still out there. If there was a god, both of them would be alive and well somewhere, and Haruka found himself praying they had reached the shore nearby rather than the campsite far away. He never had greater need of their help than now, now that he had been scared so badly out of his wits, he could no longer remember a single penguin joke to cheer up Makoto.


	29. EPISODE 6: Shocking No Breathing! - Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Makoto continued to tremble for a good while longer, wrapping his arms tighter around himself and pressing his legs just a little more to his chest each time his tremors seemed to worsen, to contain them the only way he knew how – by locking himself firmly into place until his convulsions died down completely.

At first Haruka forced himself to stand a few feet away, not wanting to pressure Makoto with his presence. He kept staring into the distance that held the promise of Nagisa and Rei, but when neither appeared within a reasonable amount of time and Makoto was still huddling helplessly by the wall, Haru gathered his courage to walk back to his friend. He hesitated, then reached out to slip a light hand onto Makoto’s shoulder, bracing himself for the inevitable, the confrontation he never wanted to have. Makoto twitched at the sudden touch of his shoulder. He raised his head just barely to glance up at Haru, but the other forced his features calm, keeping his hand where he had placed it.

“Don’t crush your chest,” he said quietly, hoping Makoto’s pressure tactics hadn’t put too much strain on the heart that had just begun beating again, let alone the ribs Haru pressed down on. He could only hope none of them had broken in the effort. “Lower your legs and take a deep breath.”

Haru half expected him to argue, but after a short pause, Makoto nodded and released his knees, letting his arms fall limply to the side as his legs gave out and stretched across the sand. Makoto took a large gulp of air, letting it out in a long sigh. Haruka’s shoulders slumped in relief.

“Good.. Keep taking deep breaths,” he told Makoto, withdrawing his hand reluctantly as Makoto straightened his back and shoulders, then began inhaling and exhaling just as Haru told him to. His chest expanded and flattened in a slow, even rhythm. Haruka found it almost therapeutic to watch it rise and fall of its own accord, his own breathing soon matching Makoto’s without even thinking. Luckily for both of them, the exercise proved just as soothing for Makoto, whose convulsions softened considerably, until there was nothing left but a slight tremble of his hands. As his breathing softened, he drew his hands into his lap and clasped them loosely together. Haru took it as his cue, and sat down next to him. He closed his eyes for a moment to prepare himself, and Makoto fell eerily silent as if he could tell what was coming. Haru pursed his lips.

“Have you calmed down?” he asked quietly. Makoto was staring blankly into space.

“Yeah…”

Haru tried to catch Makoto’s eyes and failed. He clenched his jaw.

“Makoto..”

Makoto’s shoulders tensed and Haru hesitated, but only for a moment. He could wait no longer.

“I first thought it was just anxiety over trying new things and failing, but it’s more than that.”

Makoto lowered his head like a guilty child. Haru’s heart jolted.

“You’re afraid of water, aren’t you?”

At first, Makoto froze as the well of poison inside him erupted and numbed his limbs completely, but when he at last lifted his head, his mouth curled into a small, defeated smile. It was over. Haru breached the final barrier and pierced right through him, laying him open and bare on the storm-washed sands of Sukishima. Makoto let the back of his head bonk softly against the wall at the thought, his relief so enormous it drew tears from his eyes. His throat filled with scraps he didn’t need to hold back anymore. The swim club, his friendships, and all his hopes were on the verge of fading away, but standing at the threshold of release, Makoto could not help but feel unbearably glad. He had grown tired, so very tired of pretending to be something he was not, and could only thank his unlucky stars that everything would end with Haru, who would break his heart as softly and painlessly as possible.

“I am, Haru,” he said in a whisper. Haruka stared at him in horror, his chest painfully cold and empty.

“All this time? Ever since joint practice..?” he managed to ask, but Makoto shook his head and flashed him that threadbare poolside smile Haru felt he would never forget.

“No. I’ve been afraid of the water since I was seven,” said Makoto. He lowered his eyes to the sand, the look on his face wrenching Haru’s heart like a rag.

“Why didn’t you tell me..?”

“I didn’t know how to tell you. I’ve never met anyone like you, Haru. Water means everything to you and I, I _hate_ water,” said Makoto, his voice bursting into soft, pained laughter as the well gushed forth with all its wretched filth. “For the longest time, I _feared_ and _despised_ the water and did everything I could to avoid it, and then I met you, you who wanted nothing more than to swim. I’ve never seen anyone so passionate about the water before. You seemed like the complete opposite of me. I, hah.. ha ha, I will never forget how disgusted you were when I told you I didn’t like water. You told me you didn’t need anyone like that.”

Makoto paused and wiped his face absent-mindedly, as though the tears that kept rolling down his cheeks were no more than pesky drops of rain. Haruka wanted to tell him to stop, but shame and pain had severed his tongue and wired his jaws shut.

“At that moment, I knew I would never tell you unless I had no choice, so I stayed silent,” continued Makoto, finally gathering the courage to look his friend in the eye. He no longer smiled. Any semblance of relief had peeled from his face. “I’m so sorry, Haru. I never meant to deceive you like that, I never wanted to lie to you. I was just really.. really scared. You were my only friend back then, and… even though I was terrified of water, I was more afraid of losing you.”

Haruka’s stomach clenched, then burst into a million fluttering butterflies. Makoto’s chest was jumping fiercely.

“I tried so hard to keep it a secret,” he said, shaking his head as if to laugh at his own failure and folly. “I even agreed to go to joint practice. I was terribly afraid to say yes, but I just couldn’t say no, not to _you_ , and when the day came, I remember feeling _glad_ I was injured. I was aching for days, but on that day, I thought all the pain I felt was going to keep me safe from the water. But then I was forced to dive in anyway… and when I crashed, it all came back. It was terrible.”

“Makoto..” breathed Haru, but Makoto could no longer bear the shackles he had once forged of his own volition. He continued to break the links, one word at a time.

“As I started sinking, all I could think was, _This is it_. I avoided the ocean for ten years, only to drown in a _pool_ ,” he breathed as he pressed a trembling hand to his face. “I couldn’t even move until you and Nagisa dragged me out. And by the time I got to the bathroom, I was shaking. I was shaking so badly I could hardly stand. And since then, sometimes that feeling comes back. In the pool, or in class, or on the way home, it just.. attacks me. You saw me stop in the middle of swimming, Haru. I know everyone else did, too. It was a real nightmare, trying to keep it a secret from you.”

Makoto fell silent, as though he had been spent. Haru hesitated.

“..We forced you to swim, and you did it because you felt you had no choice,” he began to say, his heart aching at every syllable. “But then.. why did you offer the camping equipment? If you had just kept quiet, there would have been no training camp. The others would have had to drop it and none of this would have happened. None of it.”

Makoto sighed. He drew up his legs again to wrap his arms around them.

“I couldn’t let that happen, Haru,” he said at last, his eyes large and gleaming. “Everyone else had their hearts set on it and for the first time, I had the chance to do something really great, to be useful to everyone just like I always wanted. And… I know this will sound weird, but.. it was Kou-chan’s idea, and she sounded so disappointed when it seemed like it would fall through. I just couldn’t take it. I wanted her to be happy.”

Haru paled. Makoto didn’t notice.

“Even though I never say it, I wonder about Kou-chan a lot. I just can’t stop thinking about how much she loves her brother, but he doesn’t even talk to her. I know you used to be friends with Rin, and Nagisa and Rei seem to think highly of him and I respect that, but it’s just not _right_. I would never treat Ran like that. So, in a way.. I wanted to do something nice for Kou-chan, to be there for her like her brother wasn’t, and help her wish come true. And not just because I can’t help being a… a _mother hen_. – Don’t smile, Haru. I know it’s true. – But because… whenever I see Kou-chan, I feel like I know her somehow, and I keep thinking she’s younger than she really is, though maybe that’s because I always think of her the way I think about Ran.”

Makoto’s hands fell into his lap again as Haruka slowly thawed out, his cheeks growing uncomfortably hot. By the time Makoto finished, his heart floated up from the pit of his stomach lighter than a feather. _You haven’t changed, have you,_ he thought to himself. _Meddlesome busybody…_

“Fine,” he said, his features hardening again to mask his relief. “All of that is fine. But it doesn’t explain why you went out to swim on your own at night.”

Makoto hung his head again.

“I’m so sorry, Haru. It was a stupid idea. I know I shouldn’t have gone out, but when evening came, I just couldn’t sleep because.. because of how close we were to the ocean. I never got to ask you, but when we had to pick tents, I desperately wanted to bunk with you. Water always seemed less terrifying when you were with me, so I thought that just being close to you would help me calm down and go to sleep.”

Haru turned his head a little too quickly. Makoto colored.

“But in the end, I couldn’t be with you and I just couldn’t sleep. Rei.. Rei is _great._ Rei has been very kind to me, but.. I just don’t feel as comfortable around him as I feel around you. Everything bothered me, the blow of the wind was driving me insane, and I just had to get out of the tent and see the ocean, to tell myself, _Look, the ocean is calm, it won’t attack you. Nobody’s going to drown in their sleep_. But then, as I kept staring at the ocean, it looked really peaceful and wonderful under the stars, so I thought that maybe if I just swam a little and looked at the stars, I would become less afraid of it. I’m so sorry. I never meant for any of this to happen. I just wanted to get over myself, and be confident and fearless like everyone else.”

Haruka stared at him, his heart swelling with fond exasperation.

“You’re the biggest idiot I’ve ever met,” he mumbled before he could stop himself. Makoto’s eyes widened, but as much as Haru wanted him to protest, Makoto didn’t say a word. He merely broke into a tender, defeated smile and lowered his head, as though he were bowing to the guillotine. Haru braced himself.

“Makoto…”

He waited until Makoto lifted his head again, then locked him in a hard stare.

“No more secrets,” Haru began in a passionate tone. “You managed to deceive everyone because you felt you had to, but it almost killed you, so don’t do this anymore. Don’t put yourself through hell to please other people. You’re too important for that! Too important to—“ He bit his lip. “To all of us.”

“Haru…!” breathed Makoto, his eyes wide. Haru flushed pink.

“Any more secrets?” he asked, his face uncharacteristically alert.

Makoto hesitated. The well had drained – there were no more painful truths to confess. All that remained inside was a tangle of tender feelings swelling in his throat, the words on the tip of his tongue, but Makoto cradled them protectively to his heart, unable to share them. Not now. Not _yet_. The time would come when he would finally feel brave enough.

“No.. not really,” he said at last with a smile, a real smile that softened his entire face. Haru turned his head and pursed his lips, his brow furrowed. What did he expect..?

“Tell me one more thing,” he managed to say, his voice a little thicker than he would have liked, in wait of an answer he now dreaded like nothing else. “I know that learning how to swim was torture to you. We all knew. But, does that mean that swimming with us in the ocean made you feel just as terrible?”

“No..!” blurted Makoto without a moment’s hesitation. Haruka turned to him with his heart fluttering. Makoto flushed. “No, that’s not true, Haru. I swear it’s not. Sure, I was afraid at first, I hardly knew how I was going to bear swimming in the ocean. But then, once we started swimming in earnest and everyone was there with me, I, I liked that. It made me feel.. it made me feel as if swimming could actually be fun..!”

Haruka stared at him wide-eyed. Was Makoto _blushing…?_

“The more time we spent together, the more I understood why Nagisa and Rei wanted to swim with you,” continued Makoto, his smile fading into seriousness. “And Haru, it’s not just them anymore. I want to swim with you too! So.. let’s swim a relay! Because if you’re not there… then it’s no good. It’s meaningless without you, Haru. I don’t want to swim if I can’t swim with you!”

Haruka’s heart was pounding as Makoto looked to him for the final verdict. Life, or death. Water or the shore, forever.

Haru’s lips twitched open. No sound came out.

“Eh? Haru..?” said Makoto as he turned towards the other, slowly leaning forward as if trying to hear him better. Haru found himself leaning closer too, their eyes fixed on each other and lips parting in perfect harmony…

“ _There they are!_ ” cried a voice in the distance. Haru and Makoto twitched apart at once, as though they had been caught in some illicit act. “ _Haru-chan! Mako-chaaan!_ ”

They turned to their right with their breaths held back. It was no illusion. Nagisa and Rei were running towards them in the rain, Rei hugging his kickboard and Nagisa waving wildly. Makoto gasped, shifting in his seat.

“Rei! Nagisa!” he called out as he rose to his feet and hurried forward to greet them. Haruka stood up to go after Makoto, brimming with relief yet strangely irked at Nagisa and Rei for showing up right at that moment, just as he was going to…

…what _was_ he going to do?

“Makoto-san! Thank goodness you are both alright..!” cried Rei when they reached Makoto, waiting for Haruka to join them before he stepped forward and lowered his head.

“Makoto-san… I owe you an apology,” he said, his voice strained. “As vice-captain and your tentmate, it would have been my responsibility to dive in and save you, but I couldn’t do it. Please forgive me…”

Makoto’s cheeks paled a little. If he himself was terrified, he could hardly imagine how Rei must have felt when he discovered Makoto was out in the ocean.

“Rei..! No, please – it was my fault. I should have never gone out on my own. I’m sorry,” he said as he bowed his head lower than Rei. Haruka tensed, but said nothing. Opposite him, Nagisa nudged Rei a little and beamed at him brightly, as if to say, _I told you so._ Rei broke into a small, tired smile.

“Well, at least you and Haruka-senpai are safe. I’m very glad,” he replied with a nod to Haru, gathering his courage as Makoto nodded and straightened again. “But I must ask, Makoto-san.. why did you go out at night without telling me?”

“Rei-chan was worried you felt pressured to train at night just to keep up with us,” said Nagisa, squinting meaningfully at Makoto, who seemed to understand the silent plea and flashed Rei a sheepish smile.

“No, I didn’t.. it was just an idea I had that turned out to be a bad one… I’m sorry.”

Haru frowned, biting his tongue not to tell off Makoto for apologizing over and over again. _Annoying… doesn’t he ever learn?_

“It’s over now,” he said out loud, his tone low but firm enough to cease all inquiries on Rei’s part. Nagisa shook his head a little. Haru turned his.

“Well, at least everyone’s okay,” said Nagisa softly and they all felt silent, basking in the warmth of their happy reunion until a gust of wind swept past and made Nagisa shudder.

“Isn’t it kinda cold..?” he hissed as he wrapped his arms around himself. Rei’s features darkened in concern.

“It is… I wonder if we can find better shelter from the rain somewhere,” replied Makoto, careening his head until he twitched to a halt, his eyes fixed on what appeared to be a large, round building on top of the rock. The others followed his gaze and waited. A shaft of light flashed overhead.

“A light house?” mumbled Rei. “But that structure looks too flat to be a light house proper…”

“Whatever it is, I guess we should check it out,” said Makoto in a tentative tone. “Hopefully it’s a rest house and they might let us in for the night.”

“Or it might be a haunted house!” chimed in Nagisa, sounding absolutely delighted at his own idea. “After a series of gruesome murders and strange disappearances, the mansion looming above Oshima—”

“ _Sukishima_ , Nagisa-kun..” Rei corrected him in a choked voice behind his defensively raised kickboard.

“—right, right, the death trap mansion of Sukishima closed its gates forever, sealing away the remains of campers whose spirits are crying for revenge..!”

By the time he finished his piece, Makoto turned as pale as Nagisa’s imaginary ghosts. Haruka narrowed his eyes, shooting Nagisa a glare.

“Stop it..” he said, his eyes darting to Makoto for a moment.

“Y-Yes, stop talking complete nonsense, Nagisa-kun!” snapped Rei in a hushed tone. “There were never any murders or strange disappearances on Sukishima _and that’s final!_ ”

“Aww, you’re no fun,” whined Nagisa.

“I am _plenty of fun!!_ ” cried Rei indignantly, his voice suddenly booming. Makoto flinched.

“Now, now..!” he pleaded as he scooted a little closer to Haru. “Maybe we could just walk along the coast and find a larger cave to—”

“Are you kidding, Mako-chan?” asked Nagisa, who made a show of rubbing his thin arms to keep himself warm. “The house on top is our only chance before we freeze to death!”

“As much as I detest the idea, Nagisa-kun is right,” said Rei, holding the kickboard a little closer to himself. “We need shelter for the night and there is hardly a better place on an island than a building.”

“If you say so..” mumbled Makoto, obviously reluctant to go. Haru sighed.

“It’ll be fine,” he said quietly. Makoto glanced at him, then lowered his head in a small, nervous nod. Rei cleared his throat.

“Haruka-senpai, as captain, I believe it is your duty to lead us to the house..”

Haruka gave him a look that seared Rei’s cheeks red with shame, but before he could defend his point, Nagisa stepped forward.

“No way! _I_ wanna lead!” he told the others, and having seen no pathway leading uphill along their way, Nagisa started running down the beach, past the shallow opening that once held Haruka and Makoto. The others had no choice now but to hurry after him if they didn’t want to be left behind – or worse, to lose Nagisa and have him be the first strange disappearance in the history of Sukishima island.

* * *

After a sharp turn around the rocky hill, Nagisa finally glimpsed a narrow path carved into its side, one that was bound to lead all the way up to the building. It seemed neglected, with no railings to guard its impressive length, and though Nagisa thought little of the danger of climbing stone steps in the rain, he had foresight enough to wait for the others to reach him first.

“Looks like this is our way up, everybody!” he said cheerfully, hoping that his happy-go-lucky attitude would hearten the others, but if anything, Makoto looked painfully alarmed and shrank backwards.

“It’s too dangerous, we might slip and fall off!” he whined from behind Haruka, his hands twitching upward as though he considered clinging to his friend’s shoulders for some semblance of safety. Rei lowered his head.

“I’m beginning to have doubts, Nagisa-kun—”

“Now, now, don’t be like that..!” cried Nagisa, looking a little alarmed himself. “We need to get to that house or we’ll just get sick out here!”

Rei hesitated. Nagisa smiled at him soothingly.

“Here, Rei-chan,” he said as he held out his hand. “Let’s form a chain and walk up together.”

Rei swallowed hard, but reached out to take Nagisa’s hand, and since he was still holding the kickboard, he held that out for Haruka. Haru gave him a look.

“Haruka-senpai..?”

“We need to hold _hands_ , Rei-chan!” Nagisa told him. “Put that kickboard away!”

“Where could I possibly put it away, Nagisa-kun?!”

“Here!” said Nagisa, and just like that, he grabbed the kickboard out of Rei’s hands and stuffed it down the back of his shorts. Rei screeched as the kickboard chafed against his skin, but before he could do anything, Nagisa grabbed his hand again and Haru seized the other, reaching out his free hand for Makoto to take. Makoto carefully clasped it, the warmth of his palm sending shivers up Haruka’s arm. Nagisa beamed at them.

“Here. Weee. _Gooo!_ ”

And so Nagisa began their slow and careful ascent, climbing towards the mysterious house that could have been anything, even and especially haunted. At least Nagisa set a comfortable, steady pace for them, so despite Rei’s fear that his pants might fall down any minute, leading to the loss of his kickboard and his dignity, he managed to move just enough to advance, while tempting the fabric as little as possible. An arm’s length behind him, Haru was heading forward blindly, not once looking up for reasons that were far more pressing than the kickboard sticking out of Rei’s shorts. His eyes were fixed on Makoto, who advanced the slowest of them all. For most of his climb, he was either staring down to watch his step, or screwing his eyes shut to block out the view of the shore growing smaller and smaller below him. Fortunately for him, Haru never let him stop. Each time Makoto seemed to waver, Haru squeezed his hand and watched him open his eyes, look up in thanks, and climb a little faster again.

* * *

The moment they reached the top, and he was finally released on both sides, Rei grabbed the front of his shorts with one hand and pulled out the kickboard with the other, not wanting to risk the exposure he had been dreading for the past fifteen minutes. The others tactfully looked away as Rei proceeded to tighten the waist-cord and secure his shorts again. Nagisa patted his arm with a grin.

“See, Rei-chan? That worked perfectly!” he chirped. Rei merely groaned in reply. “Now, let’s go see the haunted house!”

“Stop talking about haunted houses, Nagisa-kun!” snapped Rei at last, wagging his kickboard threateningly at Nagisa. His friend giggled, then dashed down what appeared to be a well-trodden path, at least before vegetation slowly reclaimed it in patches. Trees and bushes blocked their view for the rest of the way, but when they wound about, they were brought in front of the round edifice. Its many large windows loomed dark and empty, except for the trickle of rain down their panes. A large sign above the entrance read _Sukishima Rest Howse_ in colorful lettering.

“ _Rest howse?_ What’s a _rest howse?_ ” asked Nagisa excitedly. Rei rolled his eyes.

“It’s a rest house.”

“Let’s go inside, then,” said Haruka, less bothered by the rain than by the thought that he was beginning to miss the comfort of the tent and the futon within. Nagisa stepped forward immediately to try the door.

“Wait, are we really going inside?” asked Rei, following slowly after Nagisa. Haruka now stole a glance at Makoto, who seemed frozen to the spot.

“Makoto,” said Haruka, his tone calm and quiet. “Are you okay?”

Makoto blinked, but he soon cocked his head to the side and flashed Haru a grateful smile.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” he said softly.

“Hey…” Nagisa whined at them from the entrance. “Stop talking like a worried couple, you guys.” He then turned his head back towards the house. Behind him, Haruka narrowed his eyes. The urge to retaliate seized him, and unwilling to resist it, he leaned over Nagisa’s shoulder. After all, Nagisa seemed to be craving thrills…

“Did you see that shadow..?” he whispered in an ominous tone an inch from Nagisa’s ear, whose hands twitched up in fists as he squealed in raw, delighted terror. Rei immediately cowered behind his kickboard. Behind him, Makoto’s heart skipped a beat that felt like one missed beat too many. Haruka relented.

“Sorry…” he mumbled, his face tense with worry, but Makoto smiled at him sheepishly, dismissing his apology with a wave.

“I-It’s okay,” he said with a small, nervous laugh, but Haruka couldn’t relax. If the house really did hide anything vicious, would Makoto’s heart be able to take it? What if the climb had already taken a toll on him..?

“I’ll take a look inside, so wait here,” he told Makoto as he turned away.

“I’ll come with you!” said Makoto at once, and when Haru looked back at him and quirked his brow in reply, Makoto broke into a soft, troubled smile. “Since we are together, it’ll be fine.”

Haruka let out a small sigh, but didn’t argue any longer, so once Nagisa pulled the doors open, Haruka and Makoto proceeded inside, the others following close behind them.


	30. EPISODE 6: Shocking No Breathing! - Part 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everything about the exterior of _Sukishima Rest Howse_ seemed to suggest it had catered to a considerable number of tourists in its prime. The building was happily situated, despite the fact that it was troublesome to reach in bad weather, and promised an excellent view from every angle thanks to its legion of large windows all around. Nevertheless, it received no recommendation in Amakata Miho’s brochures beyond a small print mention they had all overlooked, and having seen no tents or other facilities on their way, the boys were forced to conclude that if Sukishima had any other visitors, they were bound to be inside the rest house. The light tower above continued to spin round and round in cheerful indifference, but whether they owed the pleasure to a human operator or a self-sufficient power generator remained to be seen.

Haruka stepped to the entrance. Next, he took a deep breath, but as he let it out in a sigh, he felt little more than mild curiosity and fierce determination. With Makoto shuffling close behind him, one hand sheepishly clasped onto his other arm and eyes large with fear, Haru could not afford to be afraid. The sooner Makoto could sit down and rest, the better.

A few more steps brought him inside the lobby, which stretched around in a dark, empty yawn of blank walls and barren floors. To Haru’s left, a handsome winding staircase offered a path upstairs, to what appeared a narrow gallery with hints of high-back chairs strewn about. At the sturdy base of the staircase loomed a dark doorway, the space beyond it impossible to make out from the hall. Unless they found a light source soon enough, it would have to remain a mystery.

“Wow, it’s so dark,” said Nagisa as he passed through the narrow hallway behind Makoto, careening his head left and right in search of anything interesting. A few feet away, Rei’s hands tightened on the kickboard he was now holding up to his chest like a shield.

“I have a feeling something’s going to pop out…” he whined from behind his cover. Nagisa’s eyes widened with glee.

“ _Whoa!_ ” he cried out so loud the kickboard flew up to Rei’s face with a curdled scream, which in turn triggered a strangled cry from Makoto, half swallowed as something in his chest burst into shards of pain. He instinctively lifted a hand and pressed it to his jolting heart. Haru’s eyes widened.

“Makoto..?” he whispered, his throat completely dry. Makoto flashed him a faint smile.

“Hurts a little…” he said in a small, troubled voice that went unnoticed by Rei and Nagisa, the latter now staring at something on the right side of the hallway. Haru’s eyes narrowed to hard slits.

“Look, a flashlight!” explained Nagisa as he lifted his hand to proudly point out a mount he had spotted on the wall. However, before he could reach out and claim his prize, his wrist was seized by Haruka, who began pulling him back towards the entrance. “H-Haru-chan, what are you doing? Hey, that kinda hurts—”

“Haruka-senpai..?” mumbled Rei as the door slammed shut behind the others, leaving Rei and Makoto in the dark. After a moment’s hesitation, Rei lowered the kickboard, walking over to the flashlight to take it from its resting place. With one flick of the switch, a soft light pierced through the darkness. Another and it was gone. Rei sighed in relief.

“We’ll wait for Haruka-senpai and Nagisa-kun to turn it on again. Is that alright with you, Makoto-san?” he asked in a quiet tone. Makoto nodded.

“That’s fine, Rei.. but why would Haru drag Nagisa out in this weather?” replied Makoto, his eyes now fixed on the doors with a worried expression.

Rei paused. Unlike Nagisa, he had no idea, not even a vague theory.

* * *

“Haru-chan, l-let go, you’re hurting me..!” whined Nagisa, who soon found himself standing in the rain again. He lifted his free arm to shield his face from the downpour, which soaked him and Haru in a matter of seconds. Haruka seemed not to mind. He didn’t even attempt to cover himself. He merely glared at Nagisa and gave his wrist a hard squeeze before letting go.

“ _Stop scaring everybody,_ ” he told the other, his voice uncharacteristically sharp. “You’re going to give Makoto a heart attack.”

Nagisa blinked. “But, Haru-chan, I was only—”

“Just stop it!”

“Haru-chan.. this isn’t like you…” mumbled Nagisa, his lips quivering. Haru clenched his jaw. “What’s wrong?”

Haru hesitated, but only for a second.

“By the time I got Makoto to shore, he wasn’t breathing and his heart almost stopped beating,” he explained, his eyes lowered to the ground. Nagisa stared back at him in shock, jaw unhinged and eyes widening in horror.

“ _What..?_ ”

“His heart almost stopped beating,” repeated Haruka, his voice teetering on edge. “I could just barely save him. This was an hour ago and he’s still not well.”

“Oh no..” whispered Nagisa, his eyes brimming with guilt. “Poor Mako-chan… this is terrible.. he shouldn’t be here, we need to take him to a hospital…”

“We will when we get back,” replied Haru, his brow furrowed. “We’ll tell Amakata-sensei to take him to a doctor. But for now, stop scaring him and don’t do anything sudden. No more screaming. He had _enough._ ”

“I won’t, I _won’t,_ ” promised Nagisa, his face scrunched up in a teary frown. “I’m sorry, Haru-chan… I was just pulling Rei-chan’s leg. I didn’t mean to hurt anyone, you know that, don’t you..?”

Haruka pursed his lips, but he finally nodded. Having reprimanded Nagisa, he now turned back towards the door to head inside again. Nagisa lowered his head, his arms drawn protectively over his chest, bracing himself against the wind that whipped past him in mordant bites.

“So that’s why..” he whispered, his voice sending shivers down Haruka’s spine. He clasped the door handle, but moved no more, turning his head back just barely to catch Nagisa’s gleaming eyes. “When you reached Mako-chan, he looked like he had gone unconscious, but I don’t get it, Haru-chan. Mako-chan can swim and he wasn’t out there on his own for very long, so why wasn’t he fighting for his life?”

Haru clenched his jaw. Nagisa hesitated, his small frame shaking in the storm.

“Haru-chan, _why_ did Mako-chan—”

“Let’s go back inside,” said Haru, his tone thick. Nagisa pursed his lips.

“But, Haru-chan—” he began to say, to be cut off by Haruka pushing the doors open with just enough force to be heard, and hopefully be intruded upon.

“Haru? Nagisa..?” came Makoto’s voice from inside, reliable as clockwork. He made his way over to them, stopping just short of the entrance. A moment later, he was followed by Rei, who now wielded the flashlight and kickboard like his trusty sword and shield. “Is something wrong?”

“No. Everything’s fine now,” replied Haruka, shooting a meaningful look at Nagisa, who puffed his cheeks in defiance, but deflated the moment he turned to look at Makoto. The other seemed very pale, his breathing a little too shallow now that Nagisa was quizzing his every move and feature with newfound concern. Even Rei looked a little shaken, so Nagisa forced a light smile for their sake.

“Yeah, don’t worry, Mako-chan, Rei-chan,” he said with a dull giggle. “Everything is fine.”

Makoto sighed in relief, then let out an exasperated groan.

“Then come inside or you’ll catch cold!” he scolded them, scooting to the side to let them pass. “Honestly…”

“Was going outside really necessary in the first place, Haruka-senpai?” harped Rei, who took one good look at shivering, goosebumped Nagisa and promptly ushered him into an embrace to rub Nagisa’s back warm and dry. “You were risking hypothermia! Just look at how blue Nagisa-kun’s lips and finger nails are!”

Makoto’s eyes widened in horror as he whirled around to cold and wet Haru to inspect him. Haruka tensed, his cheeks regaining some color as he felt Makoto’s eyes on him, but the sudden heat wave that flushed over him seemed to go unnoticed by anyone but himself.

“H-Haru, your lips are purple!” cried Makoto when he discerned the stark contrast between Haruka’s dark lips and the pale glow of his chin. His arms shot forward a moment later to drag and press Haru against his chest, just as he had seen the resident expert do it. Haruka gave a choked yelp not unlike a deflated rubber toy when squeezed too hard, his arms crushed to his sides as Makoto pinned him into place and started rubbing his back vigorously to save him from potential hypothermia. Had Nagisa not been told about Makoto’s condition, which unnecessary excitement seemed unfavorable for, he might have laughed. As things were, he stared at them with an awkward expression stuck between a grin and a frown, while Rei continued to gawk in shock until his own hands stopped mid-rub near the small of Nagisa’s back.

“Don’t worry, Haru, you’ll be warm in no time!” promised Makoto in a frantic tone as he continued to brush his hands over the other’s back in broad, flattening strokes. Warm though Haru felt on the outside, Makoto’s maneuvers kept knocking what precious little air he could inhale right out of him, until he could just barely manage a small, strangled plea from behind the tangle of Makoto’s arms.

“M-Makoto.. I can’t.. breathe—”

Rei let out a yelp. Even Nagisa’s expression shifted from uncertainty to one of concern.

“Makoto-san, _loosen your hold!_ ”

“Eh?!” blurted Makoto, who finally looked down and noticed Haru’s face had turned an oddly pink shade of blue. His arms relaxed at once, releasing Haruka, who all but flopped back onto the soles of his feet, which had been raised to tiptoes when Makoto pulled him upward and locked him into a hug. “Aaah! S-Sorry, Haru…”

“Idiot..” gasped Haruka, his back tingling all over and his face hotter than a furnace. “You and your idiotic strength…”

“I’m sorry..!” cried Makoto, his own cheeks growing hotter by the second. “But, Haru, that’s just mean!!”

“You rely on physical strength in everything you do,” breathed Haruka as he kneaded his arms to restore circulation. “Pole vaulting, swimming, holding others… You need to think a little before you act..”

“I’m sorry..” mumbled Makoto, his arms dropping to his sides in defeat. He paused, his cheeks growing pale. “Did I hurt you…?”

“No,” said Haru at once, turning his head just slightly. “I’m not that fragile,” he added, but Makoto instinctively glanced at Nagisa and then lower his head in guilt. Rei noticed, and his brow creased in worry. Nagisa’s face softened into a smile.

“Haru-chan is fine, Mako-chan,” he said sweetly. “You did a good job so far! You just have to do it more slowly now until Haru-chan is completely dry and warm. Gently, gently..!”

“Fluid, even strokes are the key, Makoto-san,” joined in Rei, and to demonstrate, he rubbed his hands smoothly up and down the length of Nagisa’s back. “See? It’s a perfect technique!”

“Maybe you should do this, Rei,” risked Makoto, his cheeks coloring again. “I’m not very good at it…”

“You’re fine,” said Haru, clenching his jaw in embarrassment when Nagisa cracked a grin at him behind Makoto’s back. Haruka narrowed his eyes, stepping over to Makoto to block that look of silent laughter from his view, and since he showed no resistance to the idea, he was embraced a moment later with greater care than before. Makoto lifted his hands to Haruka’s back and his palms glided down with tender force, no longer so harsh, even oddly, uncomfortably pleasant. Haru closed his eyes, his temple bonking softly against Makoto’s collarbone in silence. Above his head, Makoto stared into space with flushed cheeks as he carried on without a sound, his heart humming a little too fast. At that moment, if his friend wanted him to, Makoto would have continued to brush his hands against Haru’s back forever.

Rei and Nagisa certainly gathered as much from the way the others suddenly seemed to have closed themselves off in a small private world for two. Rei waited patiently for a few minutes, but when Haruka showed no inclination to move, Rei disentangled himself from Nagisa just enough not to be called a hypocrite, then cleared his throat.

“Ahem… please let me know when you are ready so that we may proceed with our search of the house,” he said, and though his tone neither urged nor chided, Makoto stopped abruptly, looking down for the first time since he had embraced Haruka for a second try.

“Are you warm and dry now, Haru?” he asked in a sheepish tone. Haruka lifted his head to give him a look. Makoto’s lips twitched into a smile.

“You’re not purple anymore,” he noted in a happy tone. Haru pursed his lips.

“I’m fine,” he managed to say, and since Nagisa made no mention of his dripping shorts and wet legs despite his prerogative to do and say as he pleased, Haru did his best to ignore how cold he felt below the waist, and did so with no small amount of bitterness. Rei gave him an apologetic look, more so for what he was about to say than from any remorse over putting a premature end to Haruka’s rubdown.

“Haruka-senpai, as captain, I believe you should lead the search…” he said, holding out the flashlight for his senpai to take. Haru gave him a hard look, but after a moment’s consideration, he relieved Rei of the flashlight and turned it on.

Its beam confirmed his initial suspicion. There was no furniture in the lobby, not even a chair to sit on.

“Nothing here,” he said out loud, and unsure if he wanted Makoto anywhere near the dark doorway, he proceeded to the left instead, where he stumbled upon another doorway none of them had noticed before. His flashlight fell on heaps of used pans, dishes, and opened boxes strewn around on a long stretch of counters, a fully packed sink, and a preparation island in the middle. Across from Haru loomed a rust-stained refrigerator that looked like it hadn’t been used in years. “Looks like this was a kitchen.”

“Oh, then there might be food. I’m starving..!” moaned Nagisa. Rei rolled his eyes from behind his kickboard.

“Leave it to you to think about food at a time like this…”

“Aww, gosh…” replied Nagisa with a light giggle. Rei frowned.

“That wasn’t a compliment.”

“Alright, let’s look around!” said Nagisa with renewed enthusiasm. “I’ll check the cabinet over here! Haru-chan and Mako-chan can check under the sink, and Rei-chan gets to check the dubious-looking fridge!”

“Now wait a minute!” cried Rei. “Why do I get stuck with the worst job?!”

Nagisa turned to stare him dead in the eye.

“Because it’s a _Rei_ -frige- _Rei_ -tor!” he replied as he pointed a triumphant finger at the victim of his double pun.

“That was just terrible, Nagisa-kun!” snapped Rei, who took another look at the reddish stains on the doors and shrunk back with a shudder. “I, I refuse! I have a feeling something is going to ooze out if I open the door…”

Makoto cringed. Haruka and Nagisa reeled at once.

“ _Stop it!_ ” they hissed in perfect synch. Rei stared at them in confusion.

“Alright, then we’ll use rock, paper, scissors to decide who checks the fridge, you, me, or Haru-chan,” said Nagisa. Makoto quirked a brow at his evident exclusion, but said nothing. Rei swallowed.

“Do we really have to open it..?”

“It’s the most likely place to have food,” came the all too sensible reply.

“There’s no power though,” noted Haruka to no avail, for Nagisa was now determined to uncover the mystery of the Dubious Rei-frige-Rei-tor.

“The fridge is our only hope right now!” he replied as he turned to face the others and held out his fist. The others reluctantly followed suit, even Makoto, but Nagisa uncurled his fingers to give Makoto’s fist a gentle pat. “You can sit this one out, Mako-chan, we are one too many for this game as it is!” he explained, and before Rei could protest the blatant unfairness of the decision, Nagisa cut him off by going, “ _Okay,_ rock, paper, scissors!”

Rei brought down his fist and clenched it into a rock of hope, but he was out of luck: Haruka and Nagisa’s hands were shot open and flat for paper. Rei’s lips quivered. He was about to voice his disappointment, too, when Nagisa snatched the kickboard out of his hand.

“See? It’s still Rei-chan!” he cried as he waved the kickboard around in celebration. Rei stared down at his fist utterly betrayed. “Fight-ooo!”

Unable to do anything except submit to the terms and conditions of rock-paper-scissors, Rei approached the fridge with narrowed eyes and trembling hands. Behind him, Haruka held up the flashlight and aimed it towards the middle, his eyes flitting from the fridge to Makoto next to him. To his other side, Nagisa was holding onto the kickboard, eyes wide and fixed intently on the fridge. Rei hesitated, his breath hitching as both hands reached for the handles. Makoto’s lips twitched. Haru slowly lifted a hand to cover Makoto’s eyes, but they had been screwed shut by the time his hand came to hover in front of them. Rei let out the shadow of a whine. Nagisa held back his breath.

Rei grasped the handles and threw the doors wide open, to find absolutely nothing, not even stains. The fridge had been completely cleaned out. The light in the back did not so much as flicker, just as Haruka had predicted.

“Oh, thank god…” mumbled Rei, his face beading with sweat. Haruka lowered his hand and Makoto’s shoulders slumped in relief, but Nagisa didn’t even try to mask his disappointment.

“Empty…? Aww, that’s too bad,” he said with a small sigh. Haru shook his head. “Oh well! Now, who wants to check the cupboard?”

“Not me!” replied Rei with righteous indignation. “Besides, shouldn’t we look for a heat source or a place to sleep instead? Haruka-senpai, what is your opinion?”

Haruka shrugged. If anyone had the right to decide, it was… “Makoto?”

Makoto blinked.

“Well, I..” he mumbled, and might have stopped completely, had it not been for three pairs of eyes hanging on his every word. Makoto flushed. “I supposed we should look around the entire building first. We can always come back here afterwards…”

“Agreed,” replied Rei, who now cupped his chin in thought. “I am certain that if we look, we might find a generator or other power source, possibly in the basement.”

“What if there is no basement, though?” chimed in Nagisa.

“We won’t know until we look,” replied Haru, who turned around to leave the kitchen and was followed post haste by the others.

There seemed to be no staircase leading down to the hypothetical basement, so Haruka approached the dark passageway he had previously ignored for Makoto’s sake, pointing his flashlight forward. The floor looked just as plain as the rest of the stripped down lobby, but when Haruka looked around, he at last spotted a hatch in the floor, and a row of shelves by the wall. On the shelves rested a couple of large plastic containers. Nagisa clasped his hands just enough to make a soft, unobtrusive sound of excitement, then hurried over to look inside.

“Oooh ho ho! There’s treasure in here!” he said with glee as he pulled out what felt like plastic packages and held them up to the light, where he discovered to his delight that they were brand new cooking aprons wrapped in cellophane cases. He tore one of them open, marveling at the bright orange color of the fabric, and the cheerful palm tree sewn onto the front. When he was done, they checked the other container too, which held towels of various sizes. Nagisa was positively beaming by then.

“We can get out of our wet shorts now!” he declared, immediately tugging down his own. The others spun around faster than Rei could screech, _Have you no decency, Nagisa-kun?!_

Rei received no reply, of course, so he was obliged to wait with Haruka and Makoto until the shuffling ceased behind his back, and Nagisa prompted them to turn around. He was now wearing two aprons with _Sukishima Rest Howse_ printed on them: one on the front and one in the back. Their strings were tied around Nagisa’s waist to provide better coverage, while their upper ties were fashioned into bows at the front and back of Nagisa’s neck. He turned around to give them a good look of his clever solution. Rei pressed a heavy hand to his face.

“Nagisa-kun, seriously..”

“Don’t complain, Rei-chan,” came the stern reply as Nagisa returned to the containers. “After all, we can’t risk hypothermia. Haru-chan, there’s two more aprons for you! Rei-chan and Mako-chan can have some of the bigger towels!”

“I— I feel dry enough, I don’t need any..” mumbled Makoto, his ears burning at the mere thought of stripping out of his legskin with nothing underneath. Haruka rolled his eyes and walked over to fetch him a smaller towel.

“Wipe down with this, then,” he said as he held it out, not looking the other in the eye. Makoto took it just as blindly.

“Thank you, Haru..” he whispered, then proceeded to rub his legs up and down with the towel as Haruka turned his head not to stare.

“I’ll take a decent-sized towel, then,” muttered Rei, refusing to even touch his wet shorts until Nagisa showed him all of the towels. The largest proved long enough to go around his waist with some length to spare and Rei wrapped it around, then pulled off his shorts from beneath his newfound cover, leaving Haruka the only person unchanged. Haru shot them a glare to either turn around or leave the room. Makoto took one look at him, then walked out with his ears burning. Rei turned around to follow suit, and when Nagisa merely faced the wall and clasped his hands behind his back, Rei backtracked just enough to grab Nagisa’s wrist and pull him along, stopping short of the staircase that had lent its base to the storage chamber.

“Waa-aaah, I only stayed in case Haru-chan needed help..!” whined Nagisa. Rei gave him a look.

“If you could tie your aprons yourself, Nagisa-kun, I’m sure the captain will manage for himself,” was his verdict. Nagisa puffed his cheeks at him.

“Haru will be fine,” said Makoto, his smile faint and troubled. Rei nodded in agreement, but Nagisa, who had been doing his best to occupy his thoughts for the past few minutes, now flinched at that contemptible word as though he had been struck in the face. His eyes grew large as he stared at Makoto. All evening, everyone kept saying they were fine, fine, _fine_ , but nobody was, especially not Makoto…

“Mako-chan, are _you_ okay?” he asked, his voice suddenly small and worried. Makoto blinked.

“Of course..! I’m fine, Nagisa,” he said in a soothing tone, but the more he tried for a smile, the more anxious Nagisa had become, his apprehensions about Makoto’s drowning returning full force.

“But are you really? How is your heart? Is it beating alright?” he babbled all nerves, moving closer until he could press an ear to Makoto’s chest. Makoto was caught off guard by the unexpected contact, stunned perfectly still as Nagisa wrapped his thin arms around him. Nagisa held his breath back, his own pulse roaring in his ears. After a few seconds, he thought he heard a faint murmur, one he desperately hoped was a normal heartbeat. Rei stared at them in shock.

“Nagisa-kun, what are you doing?” he pleaded, his brow creasing. Nagisa stared back at him, face pale and eyes gleaming.

“Oh, Rei-chan.. Haru-chan didn’t tell you… Mako-chan’s heart stopped beating when Haru-chan got him to the shore.”

Makoto froze and so did Rei, his jaw dropping in horror.

“ _What..?_ ”

“My.. heart…?” echoed Makoto, looking so confused Nagisa could have screamed.

“ _Your heart, Mako-chan..!_ ” he bleated as he nudged his head just a little more firmly against Makoto’s chest. There, beyond the wild drumming of his own pulse, he could finally make out Makoto’s heartbeat, slower than his and music to his ears. Nagisa’s lips twitched into a smile. “There it is…” he whispered, his cheek wet with relief. “I can hear it..”

“Makoto-san..” breathed Rei, his own eyes brimming with tears as the weight of Nagisa’s words sank in. “Oh, Makoto-san..! If Haruka-senpai hadn’t… you could have… _Makoto-san, I’m so sooorryyyy..!!_ ”

Makoto wanted to reassure him, but he found himself absolutely speechless, and all he could do was stand there in shock and confusion as Rei flung his arms around him. He and Nagisa were soon bawling in earnest, both clinging so fiercely Makoto began to feel heartily sorry for them and put his arms gently around them. He was rubbing their backs soothingly even as Haru walked out the doorway clad in a double apron, skidding to a halt to stare at them bewildered. As Nagisa an Rei continued to sob, neither of them having noticed Haruka, Makoto replied to his silent question with an awkward shrug, his hands rubbing tender circles over the others’ backs until their tears were spent and they stopped shaking.

* * *

It took Nagisa and Rei quite some time to calm down. In the meanwhile, Haruka decided to look at the hatch in the storage room just so he wouldn’t have to stare at the others, feeling increasingly uncomfortable on his own but unable to bring himself to join them.

Upon pulling the hatch open, Haru’s eyes fell on a ladder leading down the basement, where he found the generator as well as a series of power switches on the wall, one of which was labeled “kitchen.” Haruka flicked it upward. The lights started blinking opposite Makoto and his sniffling teammates, soon bathing the kitchen in a pale neon glow, but just to be safe, Haruka looked around a little more. His search yielded several electric lanterns in the far corner. He tested them all, then picked one to take with him upstairs, where he put the flashlight back in its proper place.

Back at the kitchen, Haru continued the search that had been temporarily suspended for lack of volunteers. He first checked the cabinet Nagisa had singled out for himself, and found treasure he did not dare hope for: canned goods of the highest caliber. He quickly piled them upon a clean plate that soon joined three other plates, a can opener and four forks. Since Haru now had an electric lantern, he carried that in one hand and his cargo in the other upstairs, to find a suitable place for their prospective meal. Once he had laid things out on a table, he walked down again in the dark, guided only by the light of the kitchen in the distance. Makoto smiled up at him, and when Haruka reached them, he gave Nagisa and Rei a few hearty pats on the back.

“Nagisa.. Rei…” he said in a soft voice as the others wiped their faces. “I think it’s time we all continued searching together.”

“I found food,” said Haruka, nodding towards the stairs. “I’ll prepare it in a minute.”

“You did? You’re amazing, Haru..!” cheered Makoto, his smile now genuine and warm. Haruka flushed.

“There were cans in the cabinet,” he mumbled in a thick tone. Makoto chuckled.

“I’m really glad!”

“There’s food..?” mumbled Nagisa. Rei was still wiping his wet cheeks.

“Yeah, upstairs,” replied Haruka. “I’ll go and prepare it.”

“What should we do, Haru?” asked Makoto. Haruka paused.

“Check under the sink,” he said, remembering Nagisa’s original plan.

“You got it.”

* * *

While Haruka followed the light of the lantern up the stairs, the others entered the kitchen again, where Makoto checked the cabinets under the sink and found a few bottles of water that hadn’t expired yet.

“We can boil this and drink it,” he told the others as he placed the bottles on the counter. Nagisa and Rei nodded silently, and to make up for earlier, they searched the kitchen until they found a kettle suitable for boiling and distributing water.

They soon walked up the stairs in search of Haruka, their hands full with the kettle and four cups. They found him seated by one of several round tables dotted about on the gallery, where Haruka had gathered four of the high-back chairs he spotted when he first walked inside. He had since placed the lantern in the middle of the table and evenly distributed the food, obviously proud of himself and his finds.

“Mackerel and pineapple…” whispered Nagisa at the contents of their plates.

“We lucked out,” said Haruka. Rei narrowed his eyes.

“Can’t we at least eat them separately?” he asked as he stared down in disdain at four small mounds of mackerel topped with a golden slice of pineapple each. It was Haru’s turn to give him a look.

“You should be grateful I managed to find anything edible at all.”

“That’s right,” said Nagisa, who took a seat and pulled his plate closer. “This isn’t so bad! We even have hot water to go with!”

“Hot water..?” asked Haruka. Makoto smiled.

“I found some bottled water. It hasn’t expired yet, but we boiled it just to be safe.”

“So that’s why you took so long…”

“Sorry, Haru.”

“It’s alright,” replied Haruka, who took his place opposite Nagisa. Makoto claimed the seat next to him while Rei took the final chair, and the four of them talked no more until their rations were all gone.


	31. EPISODE 6: Shocking No Breathing! - Part 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Scant as their portions were, each mound of mackerel and pineapple was demolished swiftly and mercilessly, leaving the boys with little more than some pineapple juice and oil in the cans, and a kettle of hot water to drink. Since Haruka had been in charge of the meals, Makoto decided to handle the kettle, lining up the cups in a row to pour a steaming round of boiled water for everyone. Rei seemed uninterested in drinking his, having merely cradled the cup in his hands for warmth, but Nagisa started blowing on his own so he could take a sip at last.

“Pineapple mackerel and hot water…” he sighed as he closed his eyes in calm resignation. Haru gave him a look. Unlike the others, he had enjoyed his late night snack tremendously.

“Be glad there was any food at all,” he reminded Nagisa, whose lips curled into a small smile.

“True, true, and besides, I just have to use my imagination, right?” he said cheerfully as he held out the cup. “This isn’t water, it’s a rich consommé soup. The clearest liquid gold beef bouillon soup..!”

Rei’s lips twitched into a scowl as he stared at Nagisa, then looked down at his own cup. ‘Liquid’ and ‘clear’ he had to allow for, but how Nagisa-kun could ever hope to fool himself into imagining any semblance of color or taste where there were none was baffling. It actually made Rei want to drink his plain hot water even less, now that an unreachable alternative was torturing his mind and stomach.

“Doesn’t that just make you feel worse?” he ended up asking. Nagisa sighed.

“This is the problem with people who have no imagination,” he mumbled. Rei choked.

“Well, I suppose you could add some of the pineapple juice to it..” risked Makoto. Nagisa’s eyes lit up at once.

“Good thinking, Mako-chan! Oh, or the oil! Would that make it into mackerel soup?” he asked with a grin. Haru’s eyes flashed. Rei shuddered.

“I will take some pineapple juice if you don’t mind…” he replied sullenly as he took one of the cans to coax a bit of the yellow liquid inside his cup. Nagisa and Haruka reached for the mackerel tins, claiming one each before the other might get greedy. Makoto and Rei watched in horror as they proceeded to flavor their remaining hot water with oil and bits of mackerel, but they hardly knew what they expected, for Haru and Nagisa each drank their pseudo-broth in a few large gulps, and seemed content with their decision. Nagisa then held out his cup for Makoto, who poured some more hot water for him to make a second round of diluted ‘mackerel soup.’

“I want to try the pineapple juice too,” said Nagisa, and though he had no extra cup, he reached out for the final tin in the middle, only for Haruka to pull it away. “Waaah, Haru-chan..!”

“Makoto hasn’t had any yet,” Haru told him in a flat tone, then pushed the tin towards Makoto, careful not to look him in the eye. Nagisa smiled and shook his head, making Haru turn his away. Makoto melted into a soft smile.

“Thank you, Haru,” he said quietly as he helped himself to a bit of juice, which turned out to be a clever thought indeed. “It tastes really nice.”

Rei nodded, and when he grew conscious of how Nagisa was now eyeing his cup with large puppy dog eyes, he sighed and let him have a sip.

“I think I’m all warmed up now,” added Makoto.

“Yeah,” said Haru, stealing a glance at the nearby windows. He saw nothing but a steady downpour, and the dark silhouettes of swaying branches. “It’s still raining.”

“I guess we’ll have to stay here until morning,” concluded Rei, who now felt so cozy, despite wearing nothing but a towel, that he would not have been persuaded for the world to go outside again, at least until the onset of tomorrow’s fairer weather.

“What do we do now, though?” asked Nagisa, who had since gotten himself a third round of mackerel-flavored water, and was growing bored of sitting and bemoaning their sorry situation. Haruka stole a glance at Makoto, who seemed every bit as tired as Haru imagined him to be.

“Sleep,” he said at once. They hadn’t seen any bedrooms yet, but there was bound to be at least one common room where they could lie down together… except from the looks of it, Nagisa wanted none of that.

“What?!” he cried in disappointment. “But we’re stranded on a deserted island! Aren’t we supposed to harpoon fish and search for edible mushrooms?” he whined. Haru seemed nonplussed, so Nagisa looked to Rei for support, but he did so in vain.

“We’re not on some wild TV show, Nagisa-kun,” said Rei in a stern tone, folding his arms over his chest for emphasis. Nagisa’s lips quivered in a pout.

“Still, I suppose it’s hard to sleep in a situation like this,” said Makoto, though his posture and the way his eyelids drooped said otherwise. Haru frowned.

“We should look for a place to sleep,” he said as he pushed back his chair to stand. Rei quirked his brow, but seemed to catch Haruka’s meaning from the subtle nod of his head towards Makoto, so he stood up as well.

“You are right, Haruka-senpai. Whether we sleep now or later, we should at least get to know our options.”

“Fine, fine,” said Nagisa, who set down his cup and walked over to them. He paused in thought and turned back to Makoto. “Mako-chan, you can stay here and rest if you want.”

“No, no, I’m fine,” protested Makoto at once. He then rose to stand by Haru’s side, who took it as his cue to take the electric lantern from the table. “I’d rather go with you.”

Haruka lifted the lantern in front of himself and guided them towards the left side of the gallery, where they were soon stopped by a wall with a sliding double door. Beyond it was an empty room with nothing but a few cardboard boxes in the corner, but rather than investigate, Haru passed right by them towards another sliding door, which finally opened to what they presumed had been a common sleeping chamber in better times. Not that its decor or furniture led them to that conclusion, for there were none. All they found was a pair of futons wrapped in plastic and stacked on top of each other, each no larger than a single bed.

“Only two futons for a room this size..?” said Rei, who stared at the sad and sorry stack in disdain. Not that his opinion mattered, for he was absolutely certain he would not be sleeping on either of those futons tonight, given that they needed to mind Makoto, and Nagisa was too small and cold to be sleeping on the floor. Nagisa, however, laid no claims to the privilege.

“That doesn’t matter, Rei-chan – two futons will be enough for all of us!”

“ _All_ of us?” blurted Rei in surprise. “How do you figure that, Nagisa-kun?”

“Simple! We split into pairs and each pair takes a futon, and then we just sleep on top of each other!”

Makoto colored and Haru turned his head, but while Rei stared at Nagisa baffled, he soon considered the proposal in earnest.

“I do suppose if we split into pairs with decent size differences, the lighter person _could_ lie on top of the heavier person…”

“That’s right! So Haru-chan goes on top of you and I will sleep on Mako-chan!”

“Eh?!” cried Makoto. Haruka froze into a grimace, and Rei looked nothing short of offended.

“Nagisa-kun, Haruka-senpai and I are roughly the same size!” he protested, but Nagisa shook his head.

“You are much bulkier than Haru-chan, Rei-chan, because you are well-built and muscular from swimming butterfly, and eating a balanced diet!” replied Nagisa to Rei’s chagrin, who could no longer argue lest he reject Nagisa’s absolutely correct observations on his physique and self-imposed nutrition regimen. “And besides, I am the smallest, so I would put the least strain on Mako-chan’s heart!”

“But, do we really have to lie on top of each other?” said Makoto at last, his ears burning and his eyes carefully diverted to the ground. “We could just… lie on our sides, with our backs to each other..”

“That’s no fun though,” moaned Nagisa. “How do you talk then? It’s nicer to face each other, no?”

“Talk is not conducive to sleeping, Nagisa-kun,” said Rei. Nagisa stuck out his tongue at him.

“Does anyone want to sleep now?” asked Haru pointedly. Makoto paused, but before he could speak out, Nagisa stepped forward.

“Come on, Haru-chan, don’t be like that! Let’s have a little fun first!”

Haruka shot him a hard glare. Nagisa blinked, then raised his hands defensively.

“I didn’t mean anything scary!” he whined, his face scrunching up. “I promised, didn’t I?”

Haru tensed, but he gave a half-hearted nod and turned his head away, missing how his friend flashed him a faint smile. Makoto himself would have rather slept, no matter who ended up lying on top of him, but if Haru were to stay awake for a while longer, Makoto would rather tag along. Nagisa cracked a grin at them.

“I thought we could play a game or something,” he explained, reaching for Haru’s lantern and plucking it from his hand with ease. “There were boxes in the other room, so maybe there are some board games we can try!”

“Judging from the distinct lack of furniture in the house, I wouldn’t hope so, Nagisa-kun..” said Rei in a tentative tone, but Nagisa seemed to pay him no heed. He guided them back into the previous room, where a thorough search of the boxes yielded no more than scraps, most notably a scant roll of duct tape, a few fading markers, a pair of craft scissors, and a dried up bottle of glue. No board games. Not even a measly pack of cards. In fact, most of the boxes were as empty as the open ones in the kitchen.

“Told you,” said Rei. Nagisa frowned, but a moment later, his face lit up.

“Don’t you worry! I figured out a game!” he declared with a grin on his face, and before anyone could ask him what he had in mind, he turned out all their newfound supplies onto the floor, then set upon the smallest square box to press down its flaps. He reached for the duct tape next. The others observed in silence.

* * *

Back on the main island, hidden safely in the lodge, Kou and Ama-chan continued to rest soundly on their futons, unaware that their swim team had been swept away by the tide hours and hours ago. Ama-chan only shifted about to the twists and turns of her various dreams. She eventually rolled over in her sleep, her hand flopping limply against Kou’s cheek, who gave a small disgruntled noise, then stirred no more.

At the hotel, Rin’s eyes blinked open and he sat up in bed, his posture tense and rigid. He looked to the window and could hardly see beyond the glass at first, but as his eyes grew used to the darkness, Rin could soon discern movement, the fall of a million needles of rain beyond the walls. The alarm clock blinked 2.06 am, also informing him that the indoor temperature was a cozy 26°C. Rin paused. Kou mentioned that Haru and the others were to sleep in tents on the beach. _They must be cold…_

Rin pursed his lips and stole a glance at Nitori, who continued to sleep soundly, one knee drawn up and his blanket hardly covering half of him. Rin turned his eyes to the window again.

Outside, lightning crashed down in zigzags. Rin narrowed his eyes.

 _This is stupid._ What did he care? _They can do whatever they want._

It was not like he could go down there to check on them, even if he wanted to.

But he _didn’t._

They would have to wait until his morning jog. And it wasn’t like he was going to stop and talk to them. He would just run past them, ignoring any attempts to hail him.

_There. Problem solved._

Rin sighed and closed his eyes to block out the rain. He took a deep breath and let it out slowly, gradually convincing himself there was no storm or thunder outside, and even if there was, his ex-teammates and the green cuckoo didn’t matter anyway. Eventually, he could feel his back relax and slump backwards onto his sheets… and once Rin pulled his blanket over his head, he fell asleep within minutes.

* * *

For a while, Rei, Haru, and Makoto were at a loss as to what Nagisa was doing. However, once he finished duct-taping the box and scribbling their names onto each side, there was no mistaking the final product. Nagisa tossed his creation into the air playfully, then rolled it across the floor, where it tumbled around obediently and soon landed on a side that read ‘Rei.’ Rei gave the large brown monstrosity a dull look. He then lifted his head to quirk a brow at Nagisa.

“You made a cardboard dice with our names on it,” he stated the obvious as he reached down to pick up the box.

“That’s right!” chirped Nagisa. Rei turned the dice around to inspect it.

“Uh, Nagisa-kun, my name’s on three of the faces.”

“That’s because you’re Rei-chan,” came the matter-of-fact reply. Rei’s brow rose even higher.

“What is _that_ supposed to mean?”

“It means you go first! Haru-chan, can we go back to the dining area now? It’s a lot nicer there!” said Nagisa, leaving no more room for arguments over his obviously biased creation.

Haruka shrugged and escorted them back to the gallery, where he placed the lantern on the floor, then carefully tucked his apron close to his body before sitting down. Makoto sank down and crossed his feet. Rei kneeled into place, one hand securing his towel, while Nagisa merely plopped down with the dice under his arm, just to let the others know he wouldn’t be relinquishing it any time soon.

“What is this game you want to play anyway?” asked Rei in a weary tone.

“I’m glad you asked, Rei-chan,” replied Nagisa with a grin. Rei rolled his eyes. “We will roll the dice each turn, and the one whose name it lands on has to do stuff like tell a story or do a pantomime. It’ll be fun!”

“Uh huh. Do they get to decide what they do?”

“Of course not! That’s for the game master to decide!”

“And the game master is—”

“I am, of course!”

“ _Of course…_ ”

“I came up with the game, after all! Now let’s begin! Rei-chan, you go first!”

“Now wait a minute, Nagisa-kun,” cried Rei, “the first roll of the dice happened before you even stated the rules! I demand a reroll!”

“Fine, fine,” said Nagisa, standing up to toss the dice into the air again before rolling it across the floor. “Now who’s it gonna be? Who is it gonna be?” he chanted in a sing-song tone as the dice slowly tumbled to a halt. It landed on ‘Rei’ once again. “It’s Rei-chan after all!”

Rei groaned, to no effect. Nagisa gathered up his makeshift dice and joined their circle again to orchestrate the game.

“For your first task, tell us an embarrassing story,” he told Rei. “Go on!”

“Does it _have_ to be an embarrassing story?” mumbled Rei.

“Go. _On!_ ” chirped Nagisa with his sweetest smile. Rei sighed in defeat and cupped his chin in shameful thought, soon settling on a memory he deemed embarrassing enough to meet Nagisa’s demands.

“It happened when I was in sixth grade,” he began in a thick, reluctant tone, not looking anyone in the eye. “I was on a school field trip…”

“Oooh, this is gonna be good!” chimed in Nagisa. Rei gave him a queasy frown.

“On the last day, we were gathered in the common room of the guest house our class stayed at. Everyone was accounted for, and we were asked to search our bags.. and that was when I discovered I was missing something. I rooted around in my bag, but no matter how much I looked, I couldn’t find it.. and then, suddenly, our homeroom teacher Goukazaru-sensei came up to us and said, _Hey! Someone left this in the bath!_ and held up… ”

Rei swallowed. Makoto held his breath back. Even Haru was listening attentively, and Nagisa was drinking in every word.

“…he held up a plastic bag containing my _missing underwear..!_ ” whined Rei as he buried his face in his hands. “Everyone in class saw it and I even heard someone say it was _gross!_ ”

Rei’s face was glowing crimson where his hand could not cover it, but Haruka’s poker face betrayed no strong feelings, and Makoto merely gave him a troubled smile.

“Rei, uh..” he began to say, but Nagisa leaned over to nudge Rei in the side.

“But Rei-chan, you didn’t even mention the _best part,_ ” he said with a wag of his finger. “Have you forgotten?”

“How could I ever forget…” whined Rei.

“I will have you know,” began Nagisa, shooting a look at Haru and Makoto to make sure they were paying attention, “that I went to Rei-chan’s class so I was there too, and when I saw how distressed Rei-chan looked and how scared he was that the others might laugh at him, I raised my hand and told Goukazaru-sensei the underwear was _mine!_ ”

“Nagisa…!” breathed Makoto, who looked thoroughly impressed with Nagisa’s bravery, but Rei clenched his jaw and shot them both a glare.

“Perhaps it would have been a chivalrous gesture,” he hissed through his teeth, “had you not immediately _waved the underwear at me and run over to hand it back..!!_ ”

Nagisa broke into nervous giggles.

“Ahh, ha ha, sorry, Rei-chan. I was so proud of myself that I wasn’t thinking about all the rest!” he said with a sheepish grin. Rei huffed and turned his head. Nagisa’s face fell. “And then Rei-chan ignored me for the rest of the field trip and two whole days afterwards!” he whined at Haru and Makoto. “I was scared he would never talk to me again…”

The way Nagisa’s tone dipped into genuine sadness made Rei turn his head just enough to look at him, and once he looked, he turned back towards him completely.

“Nagisa-kun…” he said in a whisper. “I’m sorry..”

Nagisa dismissed him with an oddly moved grin and a wave of his hand.

“Aw, don’t worry about it, Rei-chan! It’s all in the past now, and besides, it’s time to roll the dice again!”

Rei let out a strangled noise.

“No person has to perform twice in a row, right..?” he mumbled, but Nagisa pretended not to hear him and rolled the cardboard box, which tumbled under a nearby table. Nagisa hurried over to check it.

“Ohhh, Haru-chan’s up next!” he told the others. Rei clutched his chest and let out a relieved sigh, but Haru looked neither excited nor nervous. If anything, he was growing bored, and wondered what Nagisa had in store for him.

“Tell us about a romantic encounter you’ve had,” said Nagisa once he sat back down, his tone just lightly teasing. “Or in short, a love story!”

Makoto and Rei stared at Nagisa completely baffled.

“Love story..?” they blurted in chorus. Haruka’s brow twitched ever so slightly, but a moment later, his features smoothed out completely.

“Go ahead,” prompted Nagisa with a cheeky grin. Haru closed his eyes.

“My turn then,” he said as he slowly rose for his performance. Makoto leaned over to Rei.

“Has Haru been in love before?” he whispered, his brow creasing. Rei furrowed his own brow, cupping his chin in his hand.

“I don’t believe so, Makoto-san,” he replied, so both turned to focus all their attention to Haruka, who now looked to the distance with a curious expression.

“When I was in grade school,” he began in a solemn tone, “my parents took me to climb a mountain nearby. That was where I had my fateful encounter.”

Everyone was holding their breath, Nagisa’s eyes darting back and forth between Haruka and his audience.

“I couldn’t look away,” continued Haruka, his eyes sparkling in the dark. “From that intensely beautiful… positively vibrant… sparkling and pristine… _waterfall._ ”

“Waterfall?” came three confused voices in perfect unison. A moment later, Makoto’s shoulders slumped with a sheepish smile, while Nagisa gave Haru a disappointed pout.

“That doesn’t count as a love story, Haru-chan..” he whined at Haruka, who stood there with his face glowing in bliss. “It has to involve a _person!_ ”

“Excuse you,” said Haruka as he turned to Nagisa with a flat look, “I am clearly a person.”

“Then it has to involve _two_ people!”

“I told you, my parents were there.”

“You are hopeless, Haru-chan…” moaned Nagisa, who had evidently given up on badgering him any further. Haru internally congratulated himself on thwarting the other’s dirty schemes so easily, but when he looked to Makoto and thought he saw genuine relief on the other’s face, his cheeks started coloring at an alarming rate. He sank back down at once and turned his head away. Nagisa shook his fondly, then took up his dice to roll it again.

It landed on ‘Nagisa.’ The game master looked pleased.

“Okay! I’m up next!” he cried in triumph, then sprung to his feet with an arm raised to get their undivided attention. “I’ve got a performance for you!”

Once everyone was watching, Nagisa pursed his lips forward as hard as he could, brought both arms down to his sides with his hands sticking stiffly outward, then began waddling in one place in a rhythmic pitter-patter of his naked feet against the tiles. The others stared at him for a few seconds, but when nobody broke the silence, Haruka quirked his brow.

“What are you doing?”

“Can’t you tell?” quacked Nagisa with his lips still pursed, dropping the act for a moment, but still keeping his arms by his sides as he turned to glare at Haruka. “That was a rockhopper penguin imitation,” he told him in a stern tone.

“It was?”

“I couldn’t tell,” said Rei. Nagisa looked absolutely gutted.

“Wh-What?! Why couldn’t you tell?! Just look at this! _Look!_ ” he whined, pursing his lips again as he resumed his act, wobbling back and forth even harder than before. The way he loomed forward with his face squeezed into duck lips and his posture stiff as a pole gained no real approval from his critics, but Makoto took one look at Nagisa’s scrunched up face and burst into laughter. Nagisa looked at him comically offended.

“Aaah, Mako-chan!” he whined, but when Makoto’s expression immediately turned from amusement to guilt, Nagisa’s face smoothed out in a grin. He cocked his head sweetly to the side, dropping his act for good. “You finally smiled.”

“Huh?” blinked Makoto. Nagisa gave him a tender look.

“I’m glad. You’ve been so subdued all evening.”

Makoto seemed surprised at first, but as kind words had come instead of scolding, he broke into a gentle smile.

“Sorry for making you worry so much,” he said in a soft tone, and as much as Haru wanted to feel angry at him for apologizing needlessly, he found he didn’t have the heart. He lowered his head. Rei hesitated.

“Um, Makoto-san.. I’ve been wondering about what you’ve said before, down at the shore,” he began in a cautious tone. “That you had an idea that turned out to be a bad one…”

“Mako-chan,” joined in Nagisa, his voice now full of concern. “Why did you go into the ocean and why didn’t you fight for your life?”

Makoto flinched. His chest grew cold at once. Haruka tensed.

“We’re not gonna discuss it,” he told them flatly. Nagisa’s hands clenched.

“But, Haru-chan—”

“Just drop it!” snapped Haruka, as loudly as he had outside the building. Nagisa bit his lip. Even Rei went quiet under Haruka’s silent glare, but Makoto took one look at the other, and his heart fluttered with newfound warmth. His lips widened in a sad smile.

“Thank you, Haru,” he said quietly. Haruka lifted his head just barely to look him in the eye. “It’s okay,” continued Makoto as he turned to face the others. “This is something that’s been long overdue.”

Haruka hung his head and Makoto closed his eyes, but as he slowly opened them, he had grown eerily calm under the veil of that terrible smile.

“I struggled for a while,” he said to Nagisa in a soft tone, “but as the waves got higher, I froze.. and stopped moving.”

“You _froze?_ ” breathed Nagisa.

“Why did you freeze, Makoto-san?” asked Rei, his brow creased. Makoto’s eyes were gleaming in the light.

“Because I’m scared.. of water.”


	32. EPISODE 6: Shocking No Breathing! - Part 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nagisa and Rei fell silent. They stared at Makoto wide-eyed as a chain of memories flashed through their minds – small, troublesome mysteries that those words now put into painful perspective. Haru lowered his head, but never took his eyes off Makoto, whose fingers hooked together in his lap.

He took a deep breath. The well was empty, and he was now scraping the bottom of his darkest memories, trying to pour them into words for the first time in ten long years.

“When I was little,” he began in a distant tone that gradually grew soft and frail, “my family and I used to live in the next town. We lived in an apartment near the harbor, and I often went out there when I was lonely. There was this old fisherman there who was really nice, and would sometimes play with me… During the summer, there was a festival near the harbor, and we went there every year. I was seven at the time, and when I saw the goldfish pool, I wanted to scoop some, but I already spent my allowance. So I just watched others do it, and watched the goldfish swim. But then, as I walked away, the old fisherman showed up with two goldfish in a bag that he had scooped for me. I was really happy..! I spent hours and hours watching my goldfish swim.”

Makoto paused. His lips twitched.

“But later that summer, there was a big typhoon, and the old fisherman’s boat sank. He died.”

Rei and Nagisa looked to him with concern. Haru flinched. _So that’s why he no longer knew anyone with a boat…_

“Many of the people on board had drowned, just three kilometers away from the harbor. So close..! They were _so close_ to the shore, just like we were today, while we were swimming near Oshima,” continued Makoto, his hands trembling a little. “The funeral march at the harbor seemed endless. I ran down there to see the old fisherman, but instead there was this procession of people dressed in white, marching with these terrible looks on their faces. I ran up to the pier because nobody stopped me, and then I just froze, and stared at them. It seemed like half the town had died and everyone lost someone to the ocean. These people in white kept marching up and down the pier and I just stood there, not knowing what to do. I wasn’t so much sad, as I was scared. And then, I got even more scared when I saw there were also children. I remember… I remember two children holding hands, passing by me as they followed those people in white. Kou-chan.. kind of reminds me of the little girl I saw, with her ponytail. I saw those children, and it dawned on me that they lost somebody to the water, a mother or a father or a relative, and _I_ lost somebody too. The old fisherman was gone forever, the water took him from me, and I just stood there and couldn’t move until the march ended. After that, as soon as I could bring myself to move, I ran home, and locked myself away in my room.”

Makoto wiped at his face absently. His palm felt wet. He stared at its soft gleam in confusion, then dropped his hand into his lap.

“The twins were born that year and my parents decided to move into a house in Iwatobi, where we would all have more room and be closer to my dad’s work place. Everything was in chaos, and they were so busy all the time I had nobody to talk to. So I never told them until the day before we moved, when my dad asked us if we wanted to go down to the beach one last time before we moved away. My mom liked the idea, but I, I became hysterical. I started crying and begged them not to go, and yelled nonsense at them, stuff like we would all die if we went there so we couldn’t go. I couldn’t explain it, I could hardly talk because I was so upset, but they understood that I didn’t want to go, so we didn’t. Since then, we’ve always gone camping instead of going down to the ocean, even though we now live near it again. At first I was excited for that, earlier that year, but after that typhoon, I just stayed inside with my mom and the twins and the goldfish all the time. I felt like all that remained of the old fisherman was my goldfish, so I tried to take good care of them. I always remembered to feed them, and I changed the water in the bowl and cleaned it often, but after a few years, the goldfish got sick somehow, and they got sicker every day. I kept running home from school to take care of them, but one day I got home, and they were floating belly up in the bowl.”

Makoto gave up on wiping his face.

“I buried them in the yard all by myself. I still have the bowl, but I cleaned it out, and I put it away where I can’t find unless I’m prepared to look for it.” He paused. His features hardened. “There is something unknown in the water that lurks, and waits to kill you. You think you see right through it, but you are never safe. That’s how I felt. I stopped going anywhere near the water long before the goldfish died, including the Iwatobi Swimming Club where I learned how to swim, but after that… I didn’t even want to look at water again. I was.. just that scared of it.”

Another pause. Makoto bit his lip.

“And then I met Haru, and I ended up joining the swim club. I never imagined it would come to this, and I never meant to deceive any of you. I just.. didn’t know how to tell you. I’m really sorry.”

And with that, Makoto lowered his head, his cheeks pale and wet. Rei and Nagisa stared at him speechless. Haru creased his brow.

“Enough, Makoto,” he said in a thick tone.

“So that’s why you felt so uncomfortable learning how to swim..” said Rei at last, unable to look Makoto in the eye. “Makoto-san, I’m so sorry…”

“Is that why you squeezed my hand, too?” asked Nagisa. Makoto nodded.

“Yeah. Whenever I’m facing the water, all of me just tenses up and I can’t think properly. And I guess.. I really don’t know my own strength, either,” he added, stealing a guilty look at Haruka, who shook his head in mild exasperation. “I’m sorry…”

“It’s okay, Mako-chan,” replied Nagisa. “If it had been me, I would have done the same.”

“But, Makoto-san,” began Rei, his fists clenching helplessly by his sides. “Despite your aquaphobia, you still agreed to join the swim club… _Why?_ ”

“He filled our quota so we could swim,” said Haruka to the floor, his face darkened by a guilty frown. _And he was afraid we would throw him away if he didn’t join… Idiot…_

“I’m sorry for deceiving all of you. I never meant any harm,” mumbled Makoto. Everyone fell quiet again, their hearts sunk to the bottom of their stomachs. It took a long time, but eventually Nagisa raised his head to speak.

“Hey.. can I ask you something?” he said to Makoto. “If you’re so scared of water, why did you help us out with the training camp? I don’t think anyone knew you had camping equipment. You could have just kept quiet and then we wouldn’t have been able to go.”

Haruka shot Makoto a meaningful look, but the other was staring at his hands in his lap, where his fingers parted and curled into lax fists.

“Because… because I wanted to help. And I wanted to have a camp together, and swim with everyone,” Makoto told them, his smile no longer broken and his eyes sparking. “Even though I’m still afraid of water, it’s different when you’re all there with me. When the four of us swim together… it makes me feel like there’s no place we can’t go.”

The others stared back at him wordlessly, their hearts beating hot and fast. Just when they thought Makoto could no longer surprise them, he still managed to take their breath away.

“Mako-chan..!” whispered Nagisa at last, his entire face lit up in a grin. He pushed himself to his feet and hurried around their small circle to get behind Makoto, flinging his arms around the other’s neck in a hug. “We’ll take you places, Mako-chan, we promise!” he told Makoto in a wobbling tone, his words moving Rei as well, who opened his arms to embrace Makoto from the side.

“I will work extra hard to help us qualify for regionals!” he said with his forehead nudged against Makoto’s shoulder. Haru stared for a long moment, but finally stood up and reluctantly joined them from the other side, pressing to Makoto’s arm just enough for his silent presence to be felt. Makoto broke into a sheepish smile and carefully wrapped his arm around him. Haru flinched at his touch, but stayed where he had perched himself and turned his head away in embarrassment.

“Thank you, everyone..!” said Makoto, his own voice melting into relieved laughter. “I’ll work hard to make you proud.”

Rei lifted his head, his expression softening. “We’re already proud of you, Makoto-san.”

Makoto’s eyes widened as Rei flashed him a soothing smile and Nagisa gave him a friendly squeeze from behind. Even Haruka turned his head back just enough to nod in agreement, and this time, it was Makoto who was at a happy loss for words. His lips parted, but no sound came. Silence fell upon the gallery, a cozy, comfortable silence where nothing could be heard, not even the rain.

_How strange…_

Nagisa noticed first, and his curiosity got the better of him. A moment later, he disentangled himself just enough to turn and look out the window.

“The rain stopped,” he said with a smile.

“Indeed,” said Rei, who followed Nagisa’s eyes and slowly rose from his seat, walking over to the nearest window. “There seems to be no wind, either,” he told the others.

“Does that mean we can go outside again?” asked Nagisa, who parted from Makoto with a final brush of his hands against his neck, leaving him and Haru to sit together by the electric lantern. Makoto’s arm continued to rest against Haru’s back, completely forgotten, and Haru made no effort to remind him. “Now that there’s no rain or wind, getting some fresh air might be nice! Oh, oh, do you think there’s a way to the roof? I wanna see the view!” added Nagisa.

“There has to be some form of access to the lights above us,” mused Rei. “Otherwise maintenance would be too difficult.”

“Let’s look for a stairs or ladder then! Do you think we can turn off the lights while we go out? It would just keep flashing in our faces,” said Nagisa. Haru tensed and clenched his jaw.

“You can turn them off in the basement,” he muttered in front of himself, not looking at the others to make it clear he was in no mood to climb down the hatch, let alone climb down all those stairs just to oblige them. Unfortunately for him, Rei proved unreceptive of his subtle hints, and failed to realize how comfortably Haruka was sitting with Makoto’s arm around him to keep him warm.

“Haruka-senpai, you have been to the basement before, I believe. Would you mind..?”

Nagisa lifted a heavy hand to his face. _You’re hopeless Rei-chan_ , he mumbled through his fingers, but it was too late. Rei even picked up the electric lantern to offer it to Haruka, who pursed his lips tight and took it with a look that also appeared to be lost on Rei. Makoto’s arm slipped away from his back. Haru suppressed a sigh.

“I’ll be right back,” he told them as he began his descent down the stairs, leaving Nagisa to shake his head at Rei in the background, and Makoto to find he suddenly didn’t know what to do with his arms or hands anymore.

* * *

The three of them waited silently in the dark while Haru climbed down into the basement, where he turned off the power switch labeled ‘ROOF,’ and after some hesitation, the switch for the kitchen as well, to conserve energy they might need in the morning. Haru then made his way back upstairs. The others were glad to have him and the lantern back, ready to follow him to the only place they hadn’t searched yet, the opposite end of the gallery. Beyond a few more tables and fallen chairs, they found a bolted ladder leading to another hatch, and since Rei had made Haruka put in effort for their sake, he obliged the captain by climbing up to open the hatch for him. It gave way with a few strategic shoves, and led them into a small enclosed entrance with a sliding door. Once Nagisa scampered up after Rei, he pulled it open and stepped out onto the round concrete roof, where one look at the night sky above made his eyes grow large and his heart pulse with pure joy.

“Wow! It’s _gorgeous!_ ” he cried, even braving the large puddle of water covering most of the roof to bask in the soft glow of that star-studded sky.

“The sky is nice and clear tonight,” agreed Rei in an excited tone as he closed the distance between the door and Nagisa. He then waited for Makoto and Haruka to join them, finding to his delight that upon looking up again, he was greeted by stars that had been his old friends since his first forays into astronomy as a child.

“That’s the Summer Triangle,” said Rei as he lifted his arm to point out the celestial bodies he could recognize, one by one. “There’s Vega from the constellation Lyra. That’s Deneb from the constellation Cygnus. And there’s Altair from the constellation Aquila.”

“Is that a squid constellation?” chimed in Nagisa, pointing to a patch of stars seemingly at random.

“Where’s the mackerel constellation?” asked Haru. Makoto smothered his laughter.

“Neither of those exist,” he said with a lenient smile, but Nagisa now pointed to another milky blot on the sky.

“Is that the rockhopper penguin constellation?”

Makoto laughed again. Rei rolled his eyes.

“No such thing,” he told Nagisa matter-of-factly as he continued to search the sky. Nagisa pouted.

“Whaaat? But that’s no fun. Let’s pretend there _is_ one,” he whined as he lowered his head… and his jaw dropped in surprise. “ _Look at_ _this..!_ ”

When everyone lowered their heads to see what he meant, they felt as if the world had turned upside down. In the reflection of the large, shallow puddle, a million stars lay scattered at their feet, their glow so radiant it rendered them as awestruck as children. Even Haruka seemed completely engulfed in the milky swirls of that mirrored space, and when Makoto glanced up and saw Haruka’s expression, he broke into a smile that lit up his face like the moon illuminates the night sky. Exhausted as he was at that moment, Makoto felt he finally understood the meaning of bliss. Could his legs bear to keep standing, he would have wanted to stay and look for as long as there were stars in the sky.

Unfortunately for him, but perhaps fortunately for his physical state, the enchantment couldn’t last forever. As much as Nagisa had made a show of being wide awake and unable to sleep, his silent gazing at the universe in the puddle was soon brought to an end by an involuntary yawn and a violent shiver.

“I could fall asleep right here..” he told the others in a sleepy mumble, then started sinking towards the ground, only to be yanked up by Rei. His towel nearly fell in the process, and Rei was obliged to let go with one hand to secure it.

“Don’t you dare, Nagisa-kun, not after you finally got yourself dry!” he scolded Nagisa, who squinted at him as though he had been deprived of a delicious treat.

“Rei-chan’s so stingy..”

“ _I’m not stingy!_ ”

“Now, now…” said Makoto in a soothing tone, his own fatigue keenly felt. “I suppose we really should get some sleep before we try and get back to the main island in the morning.”

“Indeed,” replied Rei, who continued to hold onto Nagisa just for safety’s sake. “Haruka-senpai, will you lead us back to the dormitory?”

“Sure,” nodded Haru, who would have gone to sleep hours ago had the others let him. After so much pain and a miracle, his chance had come at last, even if he was not looking forward to sleeping on top of Rei, let alone to Nagisa sleeping on top of Makoto…

* * *

Once Haruka walked back to the entrance and picked up the electric lantern, the others reluctantly left that glorious stretch of liquid space on the roof and climbed down to the gallery one by one. Their captain then guided them over to the sleeping area with its plastic-wrapped futons. They stopped just short of the stack and stared down at it in uneasy silence, which was broken once again by Nagisa. He bonked his head against Rei’s arm and yawned.

“Can we lie down now..?” he mumbled against Rei’s skin.

“We’re trying to figure out a way for all of us to sleep comfortably, Nagisa-kun,” came Rei’s dismissive reply, but he did graciously slip an arm to Nagisa’s back to rub him warm while they pondered their options.

“I thought we agreed to sleep on top of each other,” said Nagisa. Rei hummed in disapproval. Haru and Makoto colored. “Why don’t we just pile together, then? We could put the two futons side by side to make one big one, and gather around Mako-chan for warmth.. I could go on top of him and you two could hug him from the side…”

“We mustn’t put too much strain on Makoto-san’s heart, remember?” Rei reminded him in a stern tone, his face flushed. Nagisa puffed his cheeks.

“Um… we could try sleeping on our sides,” suggested Makoto, who hardly dared look at either of them, and was wringing his hands something fierce. “That way we would all fit and it might be warmer..”

“I hope so.. I’m _freezing_ ,” moaned Nagisa, who gave a visible shudder and wrapped his arms around himself again. Rei’s brow creased.

“Very well, I accept Nagisa-kun’s motion for creating one large futon out of the two singles,” he said in a thick tone. “If we lie on our sides close together, we should generate enough body heat between ourselves to sleep comfortably until morning.”

Haru paused, then gave a half-hearted nod, feeling strangely glad Nagisa didn’t manage to get his way until an acceptable compromise was born, even if that compromise still gave him a sense of uneasiness. He set down the lantern so he and Rei could unwrap and arrange the futons side by side, finding to their relief that together they were large enough for four people, and seemed long enough to accommodate even Makoto, the tallest of the lot. The thickness of the futons was nothing to brag about, but as they still constituted a solid layer of cushion above the cold ground, everyone was thoroughly glad to have them at all.

“How do we lie down?” asked Haru once they set the plastic wraps aside. Rei cupped his chin.

“Well, in my opinion, Nagisa-kun should be one of the middle persons, since he is relatively small and wouldn’t generate much heat on his own,” he said in a tentative tone.

“Then the other middle person should be Mako-chan!” smiled Nagisa. “Mako-chan is pretty warm, so he will generate a lot of heat for me and whoever gets to lie in front of him!”

“So the order would be—”

“Me, then Makoto, then Nagisa, then you,” replied Haruka, careful not to look the others in the eye, and hoping his flushed cheeks did not show in the light.

“Are you sure though, Haru?” asked Makoto in a worried tone. “I’m larger, so maybe I would keep you warmer if you slept in the middle..”

“Nonsense, Mako-chan,” chirped Nagisa. “I’m sure you’ll be able to keep Haru-chan a lot warmer if you just put your arm around him nice and snug!”

Haruka turned his head sharply. Makoto’s gaze fell to the ground with nervous laughter.

“R-Really..? I didn’t think about that…”

“Nagisa-kun is right, Makoto-san,” said Rei in a gentle tone. “Your physical proximity should provide Haruka-senpai with enough heat to keep him from developing hypothermia.”

Growing tired of being the unwilling object of their talk, Haruka finally risked a peek at Makoto, whose cheeks looked every bit as flushed as Haru’s own cheeks felt hot. He sighed.

“It’ll be fine, Makoto,” he said, his eyes carefully averted. Makoto’s lips twitched into a smile.

“Alright,” came the obliging reply. Rei nodded.

“I suppose I should lie down first. Please follow my example,” he told the others as he sank down, one hand securing his towel, onto the rightmost end of the double futon, where he draped himself over his designated spot in a perfect vertical line. He then turned to face the left side and extended his right arm in front of himself, bending it slightly upward with his hand brushing the edge of the futon. “You see, ordinarily your right arm would be pinned underneath you when sleeping next to someone else in this position, which might cut off circulation and cause discomfort. However, by extending your right arm forward, the person next to you will have a place to rest their head, and by bending your arm upward, it will not be in the way for someone else further down,” explained Rei with a small push at where his glasses would have normally been, had he not left them in the tent. He blushed. Nagisa giggled.

“So am I next then?” he asked with a quick rub of his hands. Rei nodded, and after he reminded Nagisa to lie down where he could take advantage of Rei’s extended right arm, Nagisa flopped down onto the futon and rolled over to face the left. He then budged backwards until he bumped against Rei and nestled into him. Rei rolled his eyes at Nagisa’s shamelessness, but slowly put an arm around him, pressing it gently to Nagisa’s chest. Makoto’s ears were burning by then. Haruka was glaring at the ground, but Rei’s face betrayed no discomfort, or any awareness of anyone else’s.

“Like I said before, Nagisa-kun is right. By placing your left arm around the person in front of you, you provide additional heat _and_ keep them from moving around excessively, or slumping forward and leaning on the person in front of them,” explained Rei as Nagisa slapped his left hand playfully over the arm that had locked him into place. He then reached out his right arm and positioned it the way he had been shown before, though how he could entertain any hope of his thin bicep being a suitable pillow for Makoto’s head, nobody knew.

“Oh… I see..” mumbled Makoto. Nagisa and Rei were now looking up at him expectantly, so he had no choice but to lower himself and spread out a few inches from Nagisa, where he proceeded to extend his right arm.

“You need to come closer, Mako-chan,” whined Nagisa behind his back. “I can’t reach you.”

Makoto bit his lip and inched backwards, until Nagisa stopped telling him to come _Closer, closer, Mako-chan._ Nagisa then reached out his left arm, only to discover he could not drape it over the towering wall of Makoto’s back. He ultimately settled for Makoto’s waist and tucked his hand to the other’s stomach. Makoto pressed a hand to his face. Haru’s cheeks could have fried an egg.

“Are you coming, Haru..?” came Makoto’s strangled voice from behind his hand. Haruka sighed, then took a deep breath, his hands slipping to his double apron to secure it as he kneeled down and flopped onto his side. His cheek pressed against Makoto’s bicep, but the rest of him arched away from the other. He was half hoping it would discourage Makoto from touching him, that Makoto might be too shy to order him close, but he should have known better than to underestimate the length of Makoto’s arm, which reached out after some hesitation and slipped over Haruka to curl around his chest, his hand pressing close with careful tenderness. Haru shuddered. Makoto was warm, unbearably warm, his arm large and obtrusive and yet not entirely unwelcome, even oddly soothing in its proximity. _Am I really so tired that this actually feels nice?_ he asked himself. His heart was drumming fiercely beneath Makoto’s palm.

“You can come closer, Haru,” he heard Makoto from behind, his breath tingling the nape of Haruka’s neck. “I don’t mind..”

Haru bit his lip. He held his breath back and waited, but he couldn’t hear Nagisa laugh. _Good._

Slowly, ever so gingerly, Haru pushed himself backwards, until his back brushed against Makoto’s chest and his backside curved against the other’s lap almost intimately. Haru closed his eyes as Makoto’s heat spread over him in waves, enveloping him like steam in a hot water bath. It also made Haru realize he was the only one who had nobody to drape his left arm over. _Annoying…_ where was he supposed to put his arm, then?

Haru gritted his teeth as he made an attempt to tuck his left hand close to his chest without bothering Makoto. His fingers brushed against Makoto’s hand. The other twitched against him and sent tingles up Haru’s spine.

“Haruu.. your hand is _freezing…!_ ” whined Makoto. Haruka’s cheeks flushed crimson, but before he could pull away, Makoto gathered Haru’s hand into his, giving it a small squeeze as he guided it back to Haruka’s chest.

“Let me warm it for you,” came Makoto’s voice again, gentle and soft as velvet. Haru’s heart skipped a beat.

“Sure..” he managed to say in a whisper. He could have sworn he heard a stifled giggle further down, but closed his eyes and ignored it.

Within a few minutes, his heart settled into a cozy rhythm. Makoto spoke no more, but the gentle squeeze of his hand spoke for him, his heat, his closeness, his breath spoke for him, and it wasn’t long before Haru was lulled to sleep by a sense of comfort and safety he never even knew existed.

* * *

They could not have slept more than four hours before the first rays of the rising sun began pouring through the windows. It drenched them in a glaring light that reached Haruka first, but he screwed his eyes shut stubbornly and refused to acknowledge it. He pressed his free hand over his face. Behind him, Makoto stirred and nestled a little closer.

“Just five more minutes..” he mumbled in his sleep. Behind him, Nagisa quaked with suppressed laughter.

“Good morning, everyone,” came Rei’s drowsy voice from the far end.

“Good morning, Rei-chan! Hey, wake up, you sleepy heads!” chirped Nagisa, letting go of Makoto’s waist to give him a hearty tap on his hip. Makoto twitched awake with a startled yelp and latched onto Haruka with every available limb, smothering him in the process. Nagisa’s laughter grew even louder.

“Wh-What?!” cried Makoto an inch from Haru’s ear. The other sighed.

“Makoto, you’re heavy…” he muttered in a miffed tone. Makoto flushed.

“A-Aaah! Sorry, Haru..” he said as he untangled himself from Haruka, who could not help but think he had been cheated somehow by Nagisa.

“Can we go down to the beach now?” asked Rei, his voice now betraying impatience. “We need to get help as soon as possible.”

“Right, right!” said Nagisa, still unable to tone down his grin. “Everyone up, and off, weee, _gooo!_ ”

* * *

They quickly tidied up after themselves, trying to leave the building a friendlier place than they had found it. Once Haru, Rei, and Nagisa pulled on their now dry shorts, everyone worked together and put the futons back in their plastic cases, folded the aprons and towels they had borrowed, and even carried all dirty dishes into the kitchen, hoping some brave soul might one day turn the water on and clean all of them. Rei remembered just in time to grab the kickboard, while Haru placed the electric lantern from the basement by the entrance hall, within easy reach of future castaways. They then exited the building and turned back one more time to bid a heartfelt goodbye to the Sukishima Rest Howse, Nagisa half hoping they might visit it again under better circumstances.

They climbed down yesterday’s path, holding each other’s hands, with the kickboard once again tucked into Rei’s shorts, despite his wishes for someone else to do it for a change. It wasn’t long before they reached the bottom and ran down the beach, trying to find a spot that directly faced the tents. There seemed to be no one around. Haru sighed.

“It’s not that far away,” said Nagisa. Rei lifted a hand to his brow.

“If we wave, Amakata-sensei or Kou-san might spot us,” he said in a hopeful tone.

“They’re probably still asleep,” replied Haru.

“Hopefully they’ll notice we’re missing and send a boat,” suggested Nagisa.

“We can’t wait that long,” said Haru, shooting a glance at Makoto. The others colored in understanding, but Makoto said nothing, his eyes still on the smooth surface of the ocean. After last night’s near-fatal tragedy followed by precious few hours of sleep, he expected to feel exhausted and terrified at the prospect of crossing the water again, but so much excitement had rendered him alert, suppressing all awareness of his limits for the present. He stood on the beach, _alive_ , surrounded by friends who loved him. _Who would have thought…_

He almost couldn’t help his grin, and just barely resisted the urge to laugh.

“I’ll swim over and let them know,” he said to the others on a whim, his heart humming at the realization that the words came easily and artlessly, that the courage to say them made them seem perfectly possible for a change. More than that, his own words wanted to make him grin even harder, feeling absolutely certain for the first time in his life that nobody would let him do this on his own… which was just fine by Makoto, because more than anything, he wanted all of them to swim to the shore, _together._

His instincts proved correct. Despite his cheerful tone, everyone stared at him in horror.

“Don’t be stupid!” scolded Haru.

“He’s right!” said Rei, their brows creasing, but all Makoto did was turn to the ocean again, his cheeks glowing in the morning light.

“But the ocean is so calm right now,” he said in a soft voice, riding the waves of his newfound courage, and the idea that he would succeed in coaxing his friends along. “And besides…” he added as he turned back to them with a smile that seemed more dazzling than the sun, “…everyone is here with me.”

At the sound of those words spoken so earnestly, a happy flutter stirred inside Nagisa.

“I’ll come with you then!” he cried with gleaming eyes, then made a dash for the water.

“I’m coming as well,” said Rei a moment later, following after Nagisa not to separate from him again. Haru and Makoto remained behind, Haruka still unsure, but a moment later, Makoto flashed him a soothing smile, slowly moving past him with a look that seemed to encourage and invite. It nonetheless left Haruka tongue-tied and rooted to the sand, unable to do anything except watch Makoto meet the ocean, his steps as light as though he were gliding on air.

“Okay, let’s see who can get there first,” Haru heard him call out to the others in a playful tone.

“A race, huh?” said Nagisa, who had just draped himself across the surface.

“Fine by me,” said Rei once he held out his kickboard against the waves, and when the three of them turned back expectantly, Haruka finally realized he had been the last one to enter the water – twice in a row. How did that even happen…?

“Haru-chan, hurry up!” cried Nagisa. Makoto laughed.

“Let’s go, Haru!” he called out to his friend.

Haruka sighed. What choice did he have..?

* * *

Rin had gotten up just as early as the Iwatobi Swim Club, leaving the hotel room long before Aiichiro began to stir under his blanket. Ever since his return to Japan, he started every day with a jog, making no exception for special occasions, let alone a training camp designed specifically to improve himself in every possible way. He ran a few laps around the sports facility first, waiting for his curiosity to build. Once he felt sufficiently intrigued as to how his former friends fared in yesterday’s rainstorm, he completed his current lap, then took a detour towards the beach. He ran at a good pace and soon reached the tents, stopping for a moment to catch his breath when he came within earshot, but all that greeted him was silence… until, at last, he heard voices, but not from within the tents.

He straightened at once and turned his head to the ocean, where Rin could just make out the tiny silhouettes of four swimmers in the distance. _What are they doing?_ he thought to himself with a glare, eyes narrowed as he strained his ears to catch their conversation.

From what he could discern, Nagisa was whining about how he was pooped and about to fall asleep, which made Rei start screaming at him something awful from behind his kickboard to stay awake or else. Haru wasn’t paying attention to them, which was nothing out of the ordinary, but Speedo Bruises was chatting with the others while swimming _backstroke_ of all things, as if the ocean was nothing but a large practice pool with perfectly calculated boundaries.

At any other moment, Rin might have sneered at him. The most sensible option on open water, both in terms of ease and speed, would have been the front crawl, as evidenced by Haruka’s noticeable lead over the rest. Breaststroke was also acceptable for Nagisa, who had claimed it as his signature stroke, and using the kickboard was the only option Rin could imagine for someone like Rei. The idea that Rei might have been capable of maintaining an even butterfly stroke for one thousand meters straight never even crossed Rin’s mind. He himself would have certainly never attempted it in the ocean, much less use a blind technique like backstroke so far away from the shore… so what gave the imposter the right to swim backstroke like that? Had something happened since joint practice to cause such rapid development in someone Rin once thought was hopeless?

Did they really find someone who could replace him…?

Rin shook his head savagely, something akin to hatred stirring in his chest. The others were drawing ever closer, but he was not going to wait for them to reach the shore. He braced himself, then broke into a furious sprint to get as far away from the beach as his legs could carry him, hoping he would not see them again for the rest of his stay on the island.

* * *

The others eventually reached the shore, by which time Haruka had slowed down considerably, Makoto was floundering in earnest, and Nagisa had half draped himself over Rei, just barely hanging onto the kickboard they were forced to share. Despite their earlier surge of enthusiasm and energy, last night’s ordeal coupled with too little sleep and no breakfast finally caught up with all of them, especially Makoto, whose heart was threatening to give out from exerting himself so much.

Exhaustion gnawed on their bones as they crawled onto the sand, where they collapsed one by one like human dominoes. Nagisa and Rei fell asleep instantly. Makoto himself was on the verge of passing out, his eyelids drooping as he turned his head to Haru. When he caught his friend’s eyes, his lips curled into the faintest smile, but Haruka’s heart gave a frightened leap. He had to get help. He had to do _something_ if he never wanted to see Makoto lying helplessly on the sand ever again.

“Wait here,” he told Makoto, whose eyes closed as Haru shuffled to his feet to go find Kou and Amakata-sensei. With each stumbling step, his knees threatened to collapse from underneath him, but luckily for Haru, he didn’t have to strain himself for long. Laughter reached his ears not far from the stone steps, and a moment later, Kou and Ama-chan appeared down the pathway, all dressed up for the day’s supervision. Haru lifted an arm to wave, painting a startling picture in his soaked shorts and the others sprawled out in the sand far behind him. Kou gasped. She ran over to him as Ama-chan stared in surprise.

“Haruka-senpai..!” she cried when she reached him. “What’s wrong?”

“Makoto.. needs.. a doctor,” heaved Haruka. Kou’s eyes widened.

“What happened?!”

“Will explain later.. just get him a doctor,” mumbled Haru. Kou pursed her lips in thought. A moment later, her eyes lit up in hope.

“I’ll be back soon, Haruka-senpai!” she told Haru, who nodded wordlessly.

With that, Kou hurried back in Ama-chan’s direction, shouting out to her only that she was heading to the sports facility and would be back soon. Ama-chan stared after her, so stunned she had quite forgotten where she was going to set down her folding chair. Not wanting to wait for her to make up her mind, Haruka turned around and lurched back to the others, completely ignoring the tents and the possibility of lying down inside.

Not that he would have wanted to. The tents could wait.

Instead, he crawled back to the shore and collapsed beside Makoto.

“Help is on the way..” he breathed to his friend’s sleeping form, then passed out in the sand, his hand just inches from Makoto’s face.

 

**_TO BE CONTINUED…_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 


	33. EPISODE 7: One Style Final! - Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> True to her word, Kou ran all the way to the indoor sports facility. She was well out of breath by the time she collapsed onto the receptionist’s desk, blurted out her name, and asked to see Mikoshiba Seijuurou from Samezuka Academy. The receptionist blinked at the unusual request, but as he had the means at his disposal, he merely turned on his headset and announced through the speaker system that _Matsuoka Kou is asking to see Mikoshiba Seijuurou_. Within seconds, Seijuurou was followed by murderous glances from Rin as he sprinted out of the pool area, wearing nothing but his speedo and tracksuit jacket.

“Kou-san!” cried the captain when he finally reached the lobby, waving a hand at her until he came to a halt in front of her. “What can I do for you?”

“Captain Mikoshiba..!” breathed Kou, distracted only for a moment by the glistening abs and shapely legs of Samezuka’s finest. “There’s… an emergency,” she began, one hand still fluttering above her heart for air and strength. “Haruka-senpai.. told me to get a doctor.. is there, a doctor at the facility…?”

“I believe there is a health care professional,” replied Seijuurou, who shot a look at the receptionist to confirm the information. He received a nod in the affirmative.

“Down the hall to the left,” added the receptionist. Seijuurou bowed his head in thanks, then turned back to Kou, his brow creasing. “What is your emergency?”

“Makoto-senpai,” replied Kou, for it was all the information she had, but when the captain gave her a confused look, she looked away sheepishly and added, “The swimmer with the bruises.”

“Right, right!” said Seijuurou a little too quickly. “Where is he?”

“At the beach.”

“Then we shall go get him,” said the captain, his tone perfectly serious. “I’ll come with you in case he needs help walking, and once we’re here, leave everything to me!”

“Thank you…!” replied Kou with her sweetest smile, and a moment later, they left the facility at a light jog, Mikoshiba carefully adjusting his pace every step of the way to match hers.

* * *

They found Ama-chan-sensei sitting under her parasol by the tents. After they told her they would be taking Makoto to the indoor sports facility, then received her blessing to do so, the two of them walked down to the shore, where Makoto lay in the sand between a sleeping Nagisa and an equally unresponsive Haruka. Seijuurou knelt down to Makoto and proceeded to check him for injuries. When he found none, Makoto was nudged conscious, in the hopes that he could walk to the indoor facility on his own feet.

They had no such luck. Captain Mikoshiba was by no means an expert, but Makoto’s dilated pupils, his disoriented looks, and the way he dropped his head back on the sand after a slurred _I’m fine_ suggested he should not be walking at all. Seijuurou sighed. As he could not expect Kou-san to shoulder someone twice her size, he took a deep breath and braced himself for a long and tiresome journey back to the facility. Reaching down, he grabbed Makoto, then pulled him up and over his own shoulders, thoroughly glad that all those years of training for muscle strength were paying off in the most convenient of ways. Kou was thoroughly impressed. On the way back, she thanked him over and over for doing the Iwatobi Swim Club a huge favor – a seventy-three kilogram favor, to be precise –, but Seijuurou assured her he was glad to be of service. He then spoke no more to spare his energy, using nothing but smiles and hums to carry conversation, or respond to the awed glances of passersby.

The moment they reached the sports facility, Makoto was hauled off to the health care professional’s office, where Seijuurou continued to assist Kou by keeping Makoto upright as he was examined by the doctor. They were still at a loss as to what had happened to him, having realized too late that they ought to have at least woken up Haruka to ask him, but it didn’t seem to matter. The doctor took Makoto’s pulse and blood pressure, prodded his ribs, listened to his heart, then informed them that their swimmer showed symptoms of exhaustion and was in severe need of rest.

“He’s young, so a day’s rest might do the trick, but he should take care not to exert himself immediately afterwards,” she added with a smile. Mikoshiba turned back to Kou.

“Where is he staying?”

“In a tent down at a beach,” replied Kou. Seijuurou’s brow creased in thought.

“That’s not good enough in his condition. He needs a more comfortable place,” was the captain’s verdict, which came as a pleasant surprise to Kou after the discomforting memories of Mikoshiba’s corrective physical therapy. “I will take him up to my room. I share it with our supervisor Sugimoto-sensei, but there should be no trouble.”

“Are you sure?” asked Kou. She seemed much less certain and glanced nervously to Makoto, who looked no more presentable than a vagrant from the street. Seijuurou grinned.

“Leave everything to me, Kou-san!”

* * *

Ten minutes later, Sugimoto-sensei’s morning reading was disturbed in the most curious of ways, and despite Seijuurou’s earlier optimism, the advisor showed no signs of pleasure at his charitable gesture, or any understanding of Makoto’s plight.

“…So he’s not actually one of our swimmers,” said Sugimoto in a dry tone, his brow quirked sharply at the sight of Makoto sprawled out over Seijuurou’s once pristine sheets, every bit as sandy and wet as they had found him on the beach. Kou flushed, her eyes boring into the ground, but Mikoshiba merely nodded, clapped his hands together, then bowed to his advisor as deep as he could go.

“I promised this young lady, the younger sister of our top backstroke swimmer that I would take care of him!” said Seijuurou in a desperate tone. “He is a fellow athlete and an excellent friend, as close to Matsuoka Rin as family!”

* * *

Somewhere in the distance, Rin cringed and sneezed.

“Senpai? What’s wrong?” asked Aiichiro. Rin narrowed his eyes.

“Someone’s talking about me,” he said with a sneer.

* * *

Back at the hotel, even Kou gave a small choked sound at Mikoshiba’s assertions, but she managed to cover it up with a cough, telling the others her throat was dry from running. Seijuurou immediately straightened to pour her a glass of water from the jug on the nightstand. Kou thanked him and took a sip. Sugimoto creased his brow.

“You do realize, Mikoshiba-kun, that this person shall be your responsibility for as long as he is staying here?” he said in a heavy tone. Mikoshiba readily nodded.

“I believe you will find him no trouble at all, Sensei!” he replied with a grateful grin. “Right, Kou-san?”

“O-Oh, yes!” said Kou at once with her hands clasped. “Tachibana-senpai is a very respectable, responsible person. Our advisor and entire team can vouch for him!”

“May I have a word with your advisor, then?” asked Sugimoto-sensei. Kou squeaked.

“Um, she is back at the beach, supervising our swimmers,” she stammered, unsure how Ama-chan was going to take the news of a summons from the advisor of a rival school. That said, with all their swimmers unconscious, escorting Sugimoto to the beach to bask in the Iwatobi Swim Club’s incompetence might have been much, much worse. “B-But I’ll go back at once and ask her to come with me!”

“I’ll escort you!” cried Seijuurou, who then stepped over to Makoto, adjusted the blankets draped over him, and gave his shoulder a friendly pat. “We’ll be back soon,” he said to the other in a low, soothing tone that had little effect on Makoto or Sugimoto-sensei, but before the latter could protest, Mikoshiba and Kou rushed out of the room. Sugimoto still eyed him with a look of shock, hardly able to believe they left him alone with an unconscious student from another school, who was allegedly almost family to Matsuoka Rin, one of the coldest, most distant members of the Samezuka swim team. Sugimoto didn’t even know Matsuoka had a sister, and now he suddenly appeared to have relations and a close friend. _Very promising_ , he thought to himself at last. After all, camaraderie was always of prime importance at Samezuka Academy.

* * *

As Kou had anticipated, Ama-chan-sensei was startled by their request. She, abandon her folding chair, when her poor students were still lying in the sand like miniature beached whales?

“Impossible,” she said with a little shake of her head, and since she did raise a good point, Kou ran down to the shore to wake up Haruka, who might not only watch over the tents, but also supply them with the information they were still missing. She found Haru asleep, just as he had been when they first came over to get Makoto, but after a few nudges, his face scrunched up and he blinked awake.

“Makoto..?” he mumbled as his eyes screwed shut in the sudden glare of the sun. Kou broke into a lenient smile and shook her head.

“It’s me, Haruka-senpai,” she said gently. “We took Makoto-senpai to the doctor. What _did_ happen to Makoto-senpai?”

Haruka pushed himself upright, careful not to look Kou in the eye.

“He went out to swim at night.. and nearly drowned,” he explained quietly. “He stopped breathing and his heart almost stopped beating.”

Kou gasped. She extended her hand to help him stand, and Haru took it with a nod that she could only guess was a thank you.

“The doctor examined him and said he needed rest, so we left him at the hotel, and now we need you to stand guard while we go back with Ama-chan-sensei,” explained Kou, her tone a little more urgent now. Haru shot a glance at Nagisa and Rei, hoping they might guard the tent in his place, but both were snoring peacefully by his feet. Haruka sighed.

“Okay,” he replied in a reserved tone, following Kou to where Captain Mikoshiba and Amakata-sensei were standing in wait for Haruka to assume his position by the tents.

“I will be back as soon as I can to supervise your training, Nanase-kun,” said her advisor with a troubled smile. “So until then, please use the time to rest and prepare yourself for your training.”

“Please hurry back,” Haruka found himself saying in a hushed tone, caring less about training than about receiving news of his friend, but Ama-chan merely wagged a finger at him.

“There is no reason to rush when everything is being taken care of, Nanase-kun,” she said cheerfully, then donned her most solemn expression. “Remember the wise words of Confucius. It does not matter how slowly you go so long as you do not stop.”

Haruka gave her a flat look, but Ama-chan could not be prevailed upon to change her mind. She soon disappeared with Kou and Seijuurou, leaving Haruka to guard the tents, and wish uselessly that he had gone himself.

* * *

“Um, Sugimoto-sensei? This is our advisor, Amakata-sensei,” spoke Kou once they had all entered the hotel room, where Sugimoto and Makoto had been waiting for them. The latter continued to sleep peacefully in Seijuurou’s bed, his blankets now entirely covering his legs and feet thanks to Sugimoto’s kindness, whose heart finally softened when Makoto started shivering in his sleep. Sugimoto put down his newspaper, his eyes wide at the appearance of Iwatobi High School’s advisor, who stepped forward with a closed black parasol in her hands and bowed her head politely.

“My name is Amakata Miho,” she introduced herself with a smile. “I’ve heard that you allowed one of my students to stay here. I thank you for being so generous..!”

“Oh, well, it is no trouble,” stuttered Sugimoto, who did his best to reciprocate the smile, but soon broke into a curious frown and leaned a little closer. Ama-chan quirked her brow.

“Is something the matter?” she asked as lightly as she could. He hummed.

“I um, I have a feeling we may have met before..” said Sugimoto in a tentative tone.

At his words, Ama-chan gasped loudly enough to startle Makoto, who gave a small whine in his sleep, then relaxed into entropy again.

“I don’t believe so, I have never met anyone from Samezuka!” cried Ama-chan, no longer caring if she woke up her student or not. “Now I must go and supervise my swimmers, _please excuse me and thank you!_ ” she added as she steadily retreated towards the door, then hurried out of the room much faster than she had cared to walk to it. Seijuurou looked to Kou for an explanation, but she could supply none.

“I could have sworn…” mumbled Sugimoto to himself, then coughed to clear his throat. “Well, it doesn’t matter. Tachibana-kun may stay until evening,” he said with a more composed expression. Kou’s eyes fell to the floor.

“I suppose I should go back to help Amakata-sensei..” she said quietly. Seijuurou gasped, but before he could beg her not to go, Sugimoto-sensei beat him to it.

“Matsuoka-san, I believe you should spend the day at the sports facility, or at least the hotel,” he said with a generous smile. “Since one of your fellow swim club members is staying here as our guest, it would reassure me if more than one person was around to keep an eye on him.”

Kou blinked at the offer. She almost protested, too, but she caught herself in time and paused to consider the idea of staying for a whole day. She had the good sense not to leave her bag at the beach. It was hanging from her shoulder this very minute, filled with her camera and notepads, and at the facility, there would be a whole team of perfectly toned Samezuka swimmers to document at her leisure… Not to mention she probably owed Captain Mikoshiba a cup of coffee for the favor, and a cup would have gone well with some breakfast, since all she had eaten in the morning was a box of Pocky she had brought with her on the trip.

“In that case, I would be glad to stay,” she informed Seijuurou and Sugimoto, who both looked pleased for very different reasons, and thanked her kindly for obliging them. Makoto had since gone quiet again, but not forgotten. Now that Kou owed him as well for granting her the opportunity to scout the opposing team, she walked over to the poor invalid and tucked the blankets just a little more snugly around his shoulders.

“Rest well, Makoto-senpai,” she whispered in a soft tone, and spurred by a sudden spark of inspiration, she straightened and pulled out her phone.

“Captain Mikoshiba, would you mind giving me your phone number?” she asked as she flipped it open. “I will type it in and leave my phone here for Makoto-senpai with a message that he should call you as soon as he’s awake,” she explained.

Mikoshiba had never been happier to comply.

* * *

Much to Rin’s chagrin and Mikoshiba’s delight, Kou did indeed stay at the indoor sports facility for the rest of the day. First things first, she and Seijuurou retired to the lounge for a cup of coffee and proper breakfast for Kou. While she ate, they discussed Makoto’s condition, as well as their plans for the upcoming tournaments, both agreeing that the friendly rivalry budding between Iwatobi and Samezuka’s swim clubs was just the sort of healthy inspiration their respective swimmers need. Then, once Kou had finished breakfast, which Seijuurou kindly put on Samezuka’s tab, the two of them walked to the pool area, where some of the first years recognized Kou as the manager of the Iwatobi Swim Club.

As a guest of the Samezuka swim team, she was allowed to come and go as she pleased, so Kou took it as her cue to take out her camera and ask whether the team cared for some pictures to commemorate their training camp (and supply the Iwatobi Swim Club with visual information, to boot). Rin immediately turned away from Kou, and did his best to ignore her from that point onward, but fortunately, Kou had many volunteers to make up for her brother’s cold shoulder. She even managed to snap a picture of Onii-chan behind his back. Seijuurou also introduced her to his best teammates, telling her of their chosen strokes and good points, all of which was greatly appreciated for more reasons than the obvious.

All things considered, Kou had a most agreeable day. In the end, she was exceedingly glad, not only for Samezuka’s hospitality, but also that Makoto called no sooner than ten minutes to six in the evening. He had been sleeping soundly until then, and when he woke up, he gaped equally silently at the stranger staring at him above his newspaper, sitting on the opposite bed of what appeared to be a hotel room Makoto had never been to before. He sprung up at once, nearly toppled over, then apologized frantically, but Sugimoto managed to calm him down in a matter of minutes. Next, he told Makoto to call the captain of the Samezuka team, shortly after which Kou and Seijuurou hurried over to straighten things out.

They first informed Makoto of the medical exam he couldn’t recollect, then filled him in on how he had come to spend most of his day at the hotel room. Makoto thanked both the captain and Sugimoto-sensei for their generosity, apologizing again for being a burden, at which point Sugimoto pardoned him in full. He even allowed him to use their bathroom to freshen up. Makoto thanked him again.

He took a hot shower while the others talked in the bedroom, and once Makoto reappeared, looking more presentable and lively than he had all day, Kou and Seijuurou escorted him down to the doctor’s office for one last check-up.

* * *

“You stopped breathing and your heart almost stopped..?” blurted the doctor in surprise. Makoto nodded.

“I can’t remember it very well, but that’s what my friends told me,” he said quietly. Kou bit her lip and Seijuurou shook his head. Had he been less of a gentleman, he might have disregarded etiquette and told the man that he was simply not meant to go anywhere near water, no matter how good he looked in a legskin. The doctor put it much better than he could have, however, and simply said,

“You have to be more careful and observe safety regulations while you swim. I will examine you now.”

“Alright,” replied Makoto.

After some careful prodding of his chest and abdomen that yielded no painful response, a retake of his pulse, of his blood pressure, and a long listen to his heart, the doctor sighed and closed her eyes with a relieved look.

“Well, your heart sounds are completely normal considering, so you must be exceptionally hearty. ..No pun intended.”

Makoto smiled sheepishly and Kou gave the doctor a look for that pun, but Seijuurou grinned like it was the greatest joke he’d heard all day.

“Makoto-senpai is very healthy and well-built,” Kou ended up saying to break the silence, her cheeks lightly flushed. Makoto let out a short, embarrassed laugh and turned his head, but even Seijuurou was eyeing him with newfound appreciation.

“Now that you mention it, Kou-san, he’s gained muscle since I last saw him back at Samezuka,” he said with his chin cupped in his hand. “You have been working out, Tachibana!”

Makoto’s cheeks grew alarmingly red.

“I uh, I run in the evenings and go to practice with everyone else,” he managed to say in a thick voice. Mikoshiba hummed in approval.

“Very good! Keep practicing, because Samezuka Academy is sending its best swimmers to prefecturals! What is your stroke?”

“Backstroke,” said Makoto, resisting the reflex to admit he wasn’t very good at it. Mikoshiba grinned.

“Excellent! Just like Matsuoka,” he said in a jovial tone. “He’s one of our best backstroke swimmers. He sadly decided to focus on freestyle for prefecturals, but I have every hope of him swimming backstroke at a future tournament, so you had better be prepared for him when he does!”

He intended his words to please Kou, and there he succeeded. Makoto, however, could only nod with a reserved expression. Since their discovery of Samezuka’s presence on the island, he had been at pains not to dwell on just what Rin had done for Haru to agree to racing him again, or how Haru himself might have felt about it… and so he ended up wondering if his friend missed him today at training. Makoto’s cheeks flushed. Kou put a hand on his shoulder with a smile.

“Makoto-senpai, are you ready to go back to the beach now?” she asked gently. Seijuurou gasped.

“So soon, Kou-san? Won’t you stay for dinner? We have been dining at the hotel and their mackerel curry was excellent.”

“Mackerel…” muttered Kou with a dull look. “Haruka-senpai would _love_ that.”

“He would..” said Makoto with a tender smile. “I.. I suppose we could get some for everyone. Would it be possible to buy a few portions?” he asked Mikoshiba.

“It might be,” replied Seijuurou. “Let’s walk down and ask! They might have other things down at the dining hall, too, if Kou-san isn’t fond of mackerel.”

“Thank you so much, Captain Mikoshiba!” replied Kou with a grateful smile. Seijuurou flashed her a grin.

“Anytime, Kou-san! Anytime!”

* * *

After a round of negotiations, Makoto and Kou managed to secure their evening meals. In the end, they ordered three portions of mackerel curry with rice, and three portions of pork cutlets for the less inclined, which were put into styrofoam takeaway boxes, then carried by Makoto and Seijuurou all the way to the stone steps. It was there that the captain finally parted with them, telling Kou-san to come back to the indoor pool anytime she pleased. Kou thanked him for his offer with cheerful looks, while Makoto thanked him again for his hospitality.

As soon as the captain said his heartfelt goodbyes and left, Makoto turned around to continue their walk down to the beach, only to see a figure hurrying towards them. It was Haruka, who had reached the shore a few minutes ago.

“Haru..!” Makoto called out with a grin. Kou lifted her hand to wave. Haruka increased his pace and only slowed down near the tents, stopping a few feet away from Makoto and Kou to catch his breath.

“Haruka-senpai, are you alright?” asked Kou. Haru nodded, then turned to Makoto.

“Are you alright?” he asked, his tone worried. Makoto chuckled fondly.

“I am, Haru. Thank you. I’m sorry I missed today’s training, though…”

“Dummy..” muttered Haruka at once, though his own expression seemed a little bitter. “We would have made you rest anyway…”

“I’ll swim with all of you tomorrow,” replied Makoto in a soothing tone. “But for now, we should have dinner. We brought pork cutlets and mackerel curry.”

“Mackerel?” asked Haruka, his eyes wide. Kou smothered a giggle.

“Mhmm. Captain Mikoshiba told us we could get some at their hotel, where the Samezuka swim team is staying,” said Makoto.

“Oh…” nodded Haru, then seemed to pause, and after a moment of hesitation, he hazarded to ask, “Did you see Rin?”

Makoto stared back at him a little apprehensive, but Kou was delighted by Haruka’s inquiry.

“Onii-chan was training all day today!” she said in a meaningful tone. “So Haruka-senpai had better prepare for prefecturals!”

“Alright,” came the slightly stunned reply.

Makoto assumed mixed feelings behind the answer. His brow creased as he turned his head, but a moment later, Haru turned to him again, his expression a little guilty.

“Let’s have dinner, then,” he managed to say, his eyes falling to the ground. “The others will be glad to see you.”

Makoto turned back at once, his eyes wide, but his features smoothed out in a smile.

“They missed me?” he asked in a playful tone that was lost on flustered Haruka.

“Everyone did,” he mumbled and turned his head, hoping Nagisa would be merciful for a change, and not tell Makoto how Haru had been running and swimming with his head turned towards the tents for most of their training, or how he asked Ama-chan-sensei after each circuit if Makoto was back yet.

Dinner was soon served on the wooden dining platform, and as much as Haruka had been praying for discretion on Nagisa’s behalf, he had no such luck. Nagisa did say something to the effect of _We all missed you, Mako-chan_ , but he immediately added a telling _especially Haru-chan,_ which caused Makoto to shoot Haru a warm look that scorched him pink.

In retaliation, Haruka exchanged a few words with Rei at dinner, which led to a switch of tent mates despite Nagisa’s protests. Haruka was at least considerate enough to let him sleep in the orange tent, so the green tent became theirs just as Makoto first suggested. Once Haru was done changing, he shifted the futons of their tent by ninety degrees, so he could sleep by the entrance of the tent and Makoto would sleep in the back, to discourage him from ever leaving at night again. His worries were completely unfounded at this point, but his arrangement did produce the happy effect of Makoto nestling close to him, just to make sure Haru was warm enough so close to the entrance.

Not counting Nagisa’s teasing the next morning, Haruka was ultimately very pleased with the arrangements he had made with Rei, and by the looks of it, so was Makoto.

* * *

The rest of the training camp turned out every bit as wonderful as they had originally anticipated. The next morning, Makoto insisted on joining them, and with the promise of speaking up the moment he felt even the least bit tired, he was allowed to do so. As he was now well-rested, and the others a little more hardened by two days of training in a row, they managed to complete two whole circuits that day. Indeed, with each passing day, swimming had become a little easier. Even running had become fun once they started making a challenge of it, where everyone tried to outrun Makoto with no success. Not that they wanted to beat him, with the exception of Rei, perhaps. Racing a former athlete served more to test themselves and then to congratulate Makoto, who soaked up their compliments and kind words like a sponge. Makoto’s hesitation near and in the water also seemed to lessen with every stretch, and if training had given them nothing else, Haru, Rei, and Nagisa would have gladly accepted Makoto’s newfound enjoyment of swimming as their greatest accomplishment.

While they were swimming and carefully expanding their route little by little, Kou kept disappearing from the beach for increasingly longer periods of time, yet always seemed to come back just in time to greet everyone on the shore, snap a few photographs, and record their current progress. At one point, Nagisa asked her where she was going all the time, but received no reply, not even from Ama-chan despite her knowing little smile under the black parasol. Incidentally, had they any time to visit the indoor pool, they would have found that Mikoshiba Seijuurou was growing obnoxiously happy, while his regimen was getting more challenging every day to impress Kou-san. Not that anyone dared to complain. For his part, Rin was almost glad, for lately his thoughts kept drifting back to the others swimming together, and it would not go away until he had exercised himself senseless.

Nevertheless, even Rin had his comforts despite Kou’s constant appearance and Mikoshiba’s loud chatter. His times kept improving, he saw nothing of the other guys for the rest of the training camp, and from what he could overhear of his sister’s and Seijuurou’s conversation, his former teammates decided to only enter individual events. The green cuckoo was going to swim backstroke, which gave Rin pause. He was somewhat tempted to reconsider his choices and enter a backstroke event, just to put Speedo Bruises to shame and the others in their place, but while his times would have been more than enough to land him a spot in individual backstroke, Rin much preferred to narrow his focus to freestyle and freestyle only. His regimen was rigorous, and he himself, determined to win. Ocean or no ocean, Haru would not best him this time.

He would race him, beat him, and then move on.

He couldn’t wait. He had to race him soon.

Sooner.

_Right now._

* * *

The very day after their return from the island, Rin left in his summer uniform for the town of Iwatobi. He climbed the stone steps leading towards the Misagozaki shrine, drenched in the sickly glare of a faded sun that turned all it touched white and black. He soon reached the house he sought. He had not been there in years, but he could remember the way, and the turn by the single torii. The name plaque read Nanase. _Good._ He had come for Nanase Haruka.

He ran the doorbell once, twice, four times. _Nothing._ Nothing but the sizzle of grass burning in the light.

 _Tch. He’s not home?_ he thought to himself, but unable to give up when he had come this far, he tried the front door. It slid open with ease at the faintest pull of his hand.

“Oh,” he blurted, his voice no louder than a whisper. “The door’s unlocked.”

He slid it open completely. Not a sound came from within.

“I’m coming in,” he announced himself.

After he took his shoes off, he headed into the living room with slow, careful steps of his sock-clad feet. The balcony doors gaped wide open – how did he not notice from the street? –, but the white glow claiming everything outside could just barely reach across the stretch of barren floor within. The table had been moved to the side and laden with condiments, just like that afternoon when Haru’s mother ordered take-out for them years and years ago. Haru was nowhere in sight, but he could hear a soft chime of bells.

Rin’s eyes fell upon a fishbowl on the floor. A goldfish floated round a small spiraling castle of glass… or was it just a reflection of the ornate bottom of the bowl? When he walked closer, the bowl seemed empty except for its resident, which kept winding about in the confinement of the water. The bells kept chiming. Rin stared at the fish hypnotized.

The next moment, prickling chill seized him and his head jutted upward with a small, nervous grunt. The realization drenched him in sweat. Haru was right behind him, he must have just gotten home from school by the looks of that dumb dotted-tie Iwatobi High School uniform.

“Why are you here?” Haru spoke from behind him. Rin clenched his jaw as he turned just enough to see the other. As his foot shifted away, the shadow of the bowl that once stopped just short of his feet began to grow and stretch across the empty space in front of him. The shadow of the goldfish slipped away and slithered onto the floor. The bells chimed.

“Oh, you’re home,” said Rin in a hoarse tone choked with anticipation. “I’m here to challenge you to a race, obviously.”

Haru stared back at him as expressionless as ever.

“I only swim **_free_** ,” he replied, pressing the word so forcefully it grated on Rin’s ears. Around his feet, a dozen shadow fish gathered to nip at his gangly silhouette. Haru slowly turned away. Rin’s heart gave an angry leap.

“Wait!” he cried as he sprung forward, not caring if he stepped on the shadow fish, which dodged his feet with ease in the vast sea of the floor. Haru was heading to the living room door, which slipped open to let him pass into the blinding light. Rin raised his arm to cover his eyes as he walked after him.

His naked feet touched the cold smooth surface of ceramic tiles at the pool. Rin was wearing his legskin and Haru was already on the starting block in his jammers, waiting for him just like Rin had always wanted.

“Come on,” said Haru with a slight turn of his head. Rin stifled a laugh and closed his eyes.

“ _Hmph._ I’ll show you how different we are now,” he said, lifting his eyes to glare down Haru, but instead he found a young boy standing by the block. He had dark, spiky hair, just like Sousuke, but it wasn’t his friend. In his hands, the boy held Rin’s favorite trophy from his days of glory: a relay trophy adorned with a golden dolphin. In his neck hung a gold medal. He had won the relay. He had won long ago.

“Dad?” breathed Rin, his voice paper-thin. The boy turned back to him and their red eyes met. His father broke into a grin that showed his crooked teeth.

“Why..?” asked Rin as he took a step forward. His father giggled in silence, then set down the dolphin trophy on the starting block, facing the water just as Haru should have. He then ran from Rin, out of the pool and onto the street in nothing but his speedo. The medal had faded from his neck.

“ _Dad!_ ” cried Rin, his tone angry as he chased after him, down long, narrow streets with sharp turns he could hardly make, towards a looming tunnel in the distance. He ran past bowls of goldfish and cardboard boxes and cement monuments and potted plants. His father was getting closer and closer and closer, until Rin had run right through him and was now being chased himself, into the darkness and towards the light.

He burst through the darkness into a crowd of men in white, marching endlessly towards and past him, their faces full of shadows that hid their eyes and turned their mouths into black slits. They kept pouring forward unstoppably like the waves of a human sea.

Rin gritted his teeth and started running through the crowd to reach the end of it. As he tore past some of them, he caught a glimpse of a small figure standing on the side: a young boy with spiky brownish hair. He was by himself like always, eyes large and mouth gaping in terror, but Rin’s limbs carried him uncontrollably past the boy just like he had done before, _and before, and before_. Before he knew it, he fled the crowd, then reeled around to stare back in horror. He saw himself marching after the men, no more than seven years old, holding his little sister’s hand.

Rin stared as his younger self let go of his sister’s hand, leaving her to march after the crowd alone just so he could turn back to Rin.

He said something, his face disappointed for all eternity.

_Rin’s heart stopped._

* * *

His eyes shot open and Rin jerked awake in a silent scream, his heart jolting so fiercely he could hardly breathe. He leaned forward to sit up and curled his legs close, his arms sinking into the small space between them as though he wanted to shrink into nothing. He continued to heave, eyes large and mouth completely dry while everything else was drenched in sweat, just like in his dream…

“Senpai?” came Nitori’s voice from the side. Rin lifted his head sheepishly. “Are you okay? Were you having a nightmare?” asked Nitori, his round face pale and worried. Rin’s eyes rested on his features for a moment, then fell to the bed.

“I’m fine,” he said quietly.

“Are you sure? Do you need anything?”

Rin paused. _I need to beat Haru, and soon._

“Water,” he managed to say in a whisper.

Nitori scrambled across the room to get him a glass. Rin took it from him without a word, drinking it in one gulp.

“Do you need more?” asked Nitori in a worried tone. “I can go and get some—”

“No. That’s enough,” said Rin, his tone completely lifeless.


	34. EPISODE 7: One Style Final! - Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Unlike Rin, who could hardly wait for the Samezuka training camp to end so he could finally return to school at a safe distance from his former friends, the Iwatobi Swim Club secretly wished their own camp could have lasted twice as long. Their results and pleasure grew with every passing day, in no small part due to Makoto’s progress, and the time they could all spend together outside of school breaks. By Saturday evening, everyone was mourning what would be their final day of swimming among their favorite deserted islands, as Coach Sasabe and his shrimping boat would come around on Sunday evening to ferry them back home, just in time for Kou, Nagisa, and Rei to catch their evening trains.

“I don’t want to go home so soon..” moaned Nagisa over dinner, which was once again bought from the hotel thanks to Captain Mikoshiba. After each visit to the indoor pool, he was kind enough to send back Kou-san with the menu, just in case they hankered for more than frozen mackerel and pizza.

“I’m afraid it’s necessary to return by the start of next week, Nagisa-kun,” said Rei with a sigh. “Our exams are coming up, and we missed a week of preparation time as it is. Not that it was a waste! All things considered, our training camp was a worth-while endeavor.”

“Yeah,” said Haru over his food. Makoto gave him a small smile.

“And you have one more day left to enjoy yourselves!” joined in Ama-chan with a cheerful smile. “Which reminds me.. what shall we do about you, Nanase-kun?”

“About Haruka-senpai..?” repeated Kou, evidently confused. Haruka froze. Makoto blinked, and Nagisa and Rei looked up from their plates in slow motion, a small spark of realization in their eyes.

“You look so surprised,” noted Ama-chan with her brow quirked, hardly able to believe she was better informed as their homeroom teacher than Haruka’s closest friends. “Didn’t you know? It’s Nanase-kun’s birthday tomorrow, right on your last day of training.”

“That’s right! I knew there was something funny about the date!” said Nagisa with a grin.

“Haru..!” cried Makoto in a warm, flustered tone. “I can’t believe I never asked when you birthday was! If I had known, I could have prepared for it…”

Haru lowered his eyes, his cheeks flushed. Rei lifted a heavy hand to his face.

“And to think we even had to display that information on our school club charter, so for me of all people not to notice—”

“Don’t do anything,” spoke Haruka at last, a little louder and sharper than he ought to have.

“Haru..?” came Makoto’s voice from beside him, soft and worried. Haruka tensed.

“I don’t want anything. It’s fine,” he repeated himself a little more quietly this time, but everyone stared back at him as though he had grown an extra head.

“But, Nanase-kun, it will be the end of your training camp as well!” said Ama-chan in an excited tone. “We should celebrate our accomplishments, and since your birthday happens to be on the last day, we might as well celebrate you too!”

“Don’t worry, Haru-chan, we won’t do anything big,” teased Nagisa, who had never enjoyed his sisters’ birthday parties, but was exceedingly happy to hold small private parties of his own with Rei, a tradition that hadn’t changed since Nagisa turned ten years old. “Just some food and drinks, some music, dancing in the sand, inviting the entire Samezuka swim team for beach contests—”

“ _Don’t_ ,” snapped Haru, hard enough to make Nagisa stop. He stared back at Haruka with a startled expression. Haru’s glare remained in place. “Don’t do _anything._ ”

“Haru…” whispered Makoto, concerned as ever. Haru turned his head away.

Silence congealed around the table like a thick coat of ice, unbroken for the rest of their dinner. Haru had left them no room to speak, but eventually, everyone at the table started shooting small glances at Haruka, hoping he might relent. Haru found their wordless pleas more and more irritating by the minute, until he finally stood up from the table, told them he would go for a final dip in the ocean, then left for the tent to undress again. The others hung their heads. No one stirred for a while, but when Haru reappeared from the tent and headed down to the shore alone, Nagisa lifted his head with a defiant look.

“Haru-chan deserves to have a birthday party!” he said passionately, unheard by Haruka but acknowledged by everyone else. “We don’t have to do anything big, I was just teasing him, but we _should_ do something!”

“But what, Nagisa-kun?” asked Rei, his brow creased. “I don’t want to upset Haruka-senpai or disrespect his wishes..”

“Yeah… if Haru really doesn’t want us to do anything, then maybe it’s best not to..” said Makoto, earning a gasp from Nagisa.

“Not you too, Mako-chan!” he whined. “I thought you’d want Haru-chan to be the happiest on his special day!”

Makoto’s eyes widened, his cheeks coloring something fierce. Kou and Ama-chan exchanged glances.

“I do!” cried Makoto indignantly as his ears sizzled. “But he didn’t look _or_ sound happy at the idea of a party!”

“Then it won’t be a party!” replied Nagisa. “We will just, I don’t know, we could just build him a sand castle or, oh, _oh!_ A giant sand birthday cake! Then we could put seventeen candles on it, light it, and tell him happy birthday! That’s not too much, is it?”

“Candles sound too small if you are aiming for a large size sand sculpture, Nagisa-kun,” said Rei, who was now considering the idea in earnest.

“Maybe you could use fireworks instead,” suggested Kou. Nagisa’s eyes lit up at once.

“You’re a genius, Kou-chan! Seventeen fireworks for Haru-chan!”

“I’ll buy them tomorrow!” said Kou with her hands clapped together.

“Now wait just a minute—” Makoto tried to interject, but now that Nagisa got the ball rolling, he was simply no match for their enthusiastic brainstorming.

“I’ll design the cake!” “I’ll gather shells and driftwood for decoration!” “We can build it after our circuits!” “Do we sing happy birthday?”

“But we are also forgetting someone..” carried on Nagisa, now looking Makoto dead in the eye. “Mako-chan! We will need you to distract Haru-chan while we build his sand cake!”

“Eh?! _Me?_ ” cried Makoto.

“Yes, _you_ , Mako-chan!” insisted Nagisa. “You are the perfect candidate for the job, so you just take Haru-chan with you to the hotel tomorrow evening to get food, and then try and take the longest way back, and that should give us enough time to get ready!”

“But, I, _Haru—_ ” Makoto tried to protest, in vain once again.

“We are counting on you, Mako-chan!” said Nagisa in his most serious voice, his hand slamming down on Makoto’s freckled shoulder. Everyone’s eyes were now cast on him in agreement, and unable to say no, Makoto hung his head and mumbled,

“I’ll see what I can do…”

* * *

Haruka refused to return to the shore until he saw the wooden platform empty and the others nowhere in sight. Having grown tired of waiting for him, Kou and Ama-chan eventually left for the lodge, while Nagisa and Rei retired to their designated tent. Only Makoto remained outside, sitting down by the entrance of their shared tent to watch Haru swim in the ocean. At first Haru thought little of his presence and continued to float on the waves, but when he realized what the other might have been staying outside for, he gave up on swimming and made his way back, hoping he didn’t needlessly worry Makoto. His friend waited patiently for his return, retreating inside only once Haru reached the shore and began walking towards the tent. Inside, Makoto settled on his futon in the back, looking away while Haru toweled himself dry. Haru paused, and after a moment’s consideration, he stepped onto the now desolate beach to change into his pajamas. Nobody could see him in the darkness, after all…

When he came back inside again, Makoto was facing him directly, and one look at his face made Haru sink onto his futon, rolling onto his side immediately to turn his back on the other.

“Good night,” he said in a curt tone.

“Good night, Haru,” replied Makoto.

Uneasy silence followed as Haru reached for his blanket and draped it over his legs, drawing up a corner of it to keep his hand busy while he waited for Makoto to give up on the idea of talking to him. He could hear faint rustling behind him as Makoto shifted onto his side and likely pulled on his own blanket for warmth, but there was something about the sound that seemed hesitant, _unfinished_ somehow. Haru could just picture him gathering his courage to speak. Maybe in _three.. two.. one…_

“Haru..”

Haruka bit his lip. Makoto wasn’t going to sleep, not until he spoke his mind, so Haru braced himself, his hand clenching on the corner of his blanket. Makoto hesitated.

“I ah… I don’t want to push you into having a party, if you don’t want to have one,” he began in a quiet tone. “Whatever you decide, I’ll respect your wishes. But… is there any reason you are so wholly against it..?”

Haru closed his eyes. Makoto paused again.

“I don’t think we could do anything extravagant for you. Not on such short notice, anyway. I don’t think anyone was prepared, not even Ama-chan-sensei, even though she was the one to bring it up, so.. so it might just be something like cake, or a nicer dinner, or singing happy birthday. Just little things. Would— would that bother you?”

Haruka sighed. He could just imagine Makoto’s brow crease and those large droopy eyes gleam with concern for him. _Annoying…_ and yet he couldn’t ignore him.

“I don’t like being the center of attention,” he said at last, for it was just as good and true a reason as any, including the one party he did have, if he could even call spending the evening with Rin, Nagisa, Rei, take-out food for four, and a cake ordered from a patisserie a ‘party.’ Their get-together felt so long and annoying back then, but seemed so unbearably idyllic in hindsight it nauseated Haru to his core. Behind him, Makoto chuckled.

“Haru…” came his voice, soft and teasing, but without an ounce of malice. “I suppose I understand that. That’s just like you, Haru.”

“ _Is it_ ,” came the flat answer, but Makoto still laughed.

“Yeah. If it were me, I think I’d enjoy having a party. I used to have birthday parties when I was little, but after the… since we’ve moved, I haven’t had any friends to invite, so it’s just been birthday dinners with my family. That’s fine, though. My mom always makes my favorite, and we have chocolate cake and play board games together.”

Makoto sounded happy enough, but Haru still felt a sad twinge in his heart. If anyone, Makoto would have deserved to have parties if he wanted them so much. When was his birthday, anyway? _He told the girls he was a Scorpio, so.. late October? Early November?_

“That’s nice,” he managed to say, internally scolding himself for the lackluster reply. Not that Makoto minded. Haru felt as though he couldn’t offend him if he tried.

“I do like my birthday,” continued Makoto in a far-away tone. “And.. I think everyone deserves to be celebrated at least a little on their birthday.”

“When _is_ your birthday?” asked Haru. If he couldn’t change the subject so easily, the least he could try was shift it in another direction.

“November the seventeenth,” came the amused reply, followed by a small laugh. “I’ll be seventeen on the seventeenth this year!”

“Ah…”

A short pause.

“Haru..”

Haru could feel his shoulders growing stiff as he braced himself for another attack with diminishing patience.

“Hm..?”

“Would you mind very much if we just said happy birthday, and maybe got some dinner and cake from the hotel?” began Makoto once again in an effort to comply with the others’ wishes and make everyone as happy as possible. Haru gritted his teeth. “We won’t sing if it embarrasses you, and I’ll tell everyone not to put you on the spot. It would just be—”

“ _Why are you so hung up about this?_ ” snapped Haru at last, his tone harder than he intended, but now that he managed to say it, he could contain himself no longer. “Did the others put you up to this or are you just being naturally meddlesome?”

He could hear Makoto’s next breath, a little sharper than the ones before it as if swallowed painfully fast. When he spoke again, his voice was thick.

“Both.. and neither.”

“What do you mean, both and neither?” asked Haru, his voice still on edge. Makoto hesitated. Haruka sighed. ”Why are you doing this? Why is this so important to you?”

Makoto paused again, but it was a very short pause, for the answer came to him too easily.

“Because Haru lives alone.. and deserves more than just going back to an empty house.”

His tone was artless, almost childishly sincere as he uttered those words, yet Haru’s heart skipped a beat. His eyes grew larger and larger until they felt painful in their small, tired sockets, then started stinging till he screwed them shut.

_Why..?_

Another stretch of silence followed, if only because Haruka struggled to breathe as his shoulders shrank and his legs curled closer to his body, while Makoto was fumbling for the right words – until, at last, he felt he had found them.

“Haru…”

Haruka wrapped his arms around his thin torso. Makoto swallowed.

“Are you cold, Haru..?”

Haru’s breath hitched a little. His lashes fluttered open, wet and heavy. _Is he going to… No. No, he can’t be…_

“Yeah…” he said in the faintest voice, sounding so small and pathetic he clenched his jaw in embarrassment. He could hear rustling behind him again as Makoto shifted on the futon, and a moment later, tingling chills spread all over Haruka as Makoto curled against him completely, enveloping him in life-affirming heat that felt terribly wonderful after the cold water of the ocean. Makoto leaned away just enough to pull his blanket after himself, then draped his arm over Haru’s side, stopping just short of his chest. His other arm was nowhere to be seen or felt, but when Haru pulled his pillow out from underneath his head, Makoto’s left arm slid down at once to replace it. Flushed as his cheeks were, Haru’s face felt cold against Makoto’s bicep.

“Are your hands cold?” whispered Makoto into his hair, his voice a little thick. Haru bit his lip.

“Yeah..” he breathed, and since he had tucked his left hand underneath the pillow beside him, only his other hand remained to be gathered in Makoto’s ridiculously large hand and pressed to Haru’s chest, where they melted together like a lump of live ember.

“Good night, Haru,” said Makoto, his voice low, soft, and blissfully final.

“Night,” replied Haruka, and though his mind was whirling and his heart felt full of gaping holes, his thoughts and pain drained away soon enough, until all that remained was the sound of his heartbeat falling into rhythm with Makoto’s.

* * *

The next morning, neither said anything as they disentangled, dressed, then walked to the nearby restrooms for a morning wash at the sink, nor did they say anything to the others throughout practice. The desire to be silent seemed mutual on all sides, but once everyone changed into regular clothes after training in wait for Coach Sasabe to arrive, Haruka miraculously let himself be persuaded to walk with Makoto to the hotel to buy their final meal on the island.

They walked slowly, but Haru said nothing, not even when Makoto asked for Seijuurou at reception to be their negotiator at the hotel’s restaurant, as he had been for the past few nights. Haruka waited obediently while the two of them exchanged a lot of unnecessary words and _thank yous_ , nor did he lose his patience while Makoto contemplated what sort of food to get for everyone, and which dessert might be nicest, and if they should get Coach Sasabe a slice of cake (“I suppose we might as well, since he’s been kind enough to bring us here and is taking us back.”) In the end, they got grilled mackerel for Haruka, a mixed plate for everyone else, and the simplest strawberry shortcake, and Haru had no objections to going back the long way, past the village and down one end of the beach and back to the tents again. Tired as he felt, he enjoyed treading in the cool sand and listening to Makoto ramble about the training camp, next week’s exams, and different kinds of cake. Indeed, the more he listened, the more he wished time would loop itself around them so they’d never reach the others.

In the meantime, Kou ran off to the village and bought the fireworks, while Rei and Nagisa were at absolute pains to fashion a handsome sculpture out of wet sand. Neither were artistically gifted, and Ama-chan was reluctant to get her hands and clothes dirty, but the boys eventually managed on their own, then persuaded their advisor to guard the masterpiece while they made a cover for it. First, they took down one of the tents completely and packed it away, then made adjustments to the other, leaving it standing but bottomless as a cover for their finished creation. They then carried it to the shore, where they set it down over the sand cake, and everyone hid behind it, waiting for Makoto and Haru to return.

Having taken so long to set things up, they only had to wait a few minutes before Makoto called out to them, the two fast approaching the still standing tent. Nagisa stood up from behind it, waved to them, then he and Rei lifted the tent together, revealing a giant sand birthday cake decorated with shells for whipped cream swirls and pebbles for strawberries, with seventeen fireworks sticking out of the surface ready to pop and fly. In the middle rested a peace of driftwood that read _Happy Birthday_ , hard as it was to make out in the dark until Ama-chan lit the fireworks and let their glow illuminate the message. Haru stared at it quite stunned. He said nothing for the longest time, but his face seemed to soften as the fireworks cracked and sparkled across the sky. In the end, he allowed himself to be congratulated, and even hugged with varying degrees of intimacy and intensity by the others, with Kou telling him that her brother would have probably given his best wishes if he had been there. Haru nodded, then stepped over to Makoto, who got to embrace him last, and held him longer than anyone else. Until then, Haruka’s arms hung limply with every hug he received, but for his final chance, his hands lifted a little to settle on Makoto’s back.

“Congratulations, Haru,” said Makoto warmly once he let go and stepped back. Haru lowered his eyes.

“It’s just a birthday…” he mumbled, but once everyone was sitting round the large wooden table, eating cake and laughing, he turned his head slightly towards Makoto, hiding his smile where he felt it would be safest.

* * *

The next day, yesterday’s silence continued for more natural reasons, everyone having staying up late to unpack and get ready for school. However, when classes were over, the boys headed to the pool for practice, where they found that Kou’s handmade calendar now read in large black letters, _12 Days Until the Prefectural Tournament!_ Kou herself was already there with her stopwatch at the ready.

Once the boys changed into their swimsuits, time trials began with Kou timing and vice-captain Rei supervising everyone. Just for curiosity’s sake, they decided to start with Makoto, who managed a near-flawless entry and set a new personal record on his first try.

“Congratulations, Makoto-senpai!” cheered Kou. “It’s your best time yet!”

“Is it?” asked Makoto, who flushed and let out a relieved laugh. “I’m glad!”

“Yup! The training camp from hell paid off!” replied Kou with a grin.

“Congratulations, Makoto-san! You may go and practice your entry and your turn now, since I’m afraid you had no opportunity to practice them at camp,” said Rei in an apologetic tone. Makoto smiled and nodded.

“Alright,” came the obliging reply. Makoto then retired to the furthest lane, not to be in the way for Haruka and Nagisa’s joint timing of front crawl. Haruka touched the wall first and Kou’s finger slammed down on the stop button. Nagisa reached the block. Another press.

“Amazing, Haruka-senpai! That’s another personal best!” cried Kou in joy as Haru pulled off his cap to shake his hair loose. Not to be forgotten, Nagisa took a deep breath, ducked under the rope, then joined Haruka in his lane, wiping his face before he looked up to Kou.

“What about me?” he asked impatiently. Kou checked his time and shook her head.

“You will need to work a little harder, Nagisa-kun,” she said with a gentle smile. Behind her, Rei pressed his glasses into place.

“Perhaps it wasn’t a new record, but I believe we have all improved, and within a relatively short time, too,” he said with a triumphant smirk. “Haruka-senpai keeps surpassing himself, Nagisa-kun’s long reach technique seems to be improving, and Makoto-san has made great progress on his backstroke technique.”

“We’re lucky that Makoto-senpai is really well-built from all the running and pole vaulting he’s done,” conceded Kou. “But that’s not enough!” she continued, wagging her finger at them until it soared above her head. “We must aim higher! And find a proper coach!”

“What? Find a coach _now?_ ” cried Nagisa.

“It’s never too late to start,” chided Kou, her finger still in the air. “Even if they could only provide some last-minute conditioning, we’d still be in better condition for the tournament!” she said in fiery enthusiasm. Behind her, Rei adjusted his glasses again.

“I certainly agree with you, Kou-san, but I believe Coach Sasabe isn’t available—”

“That’s why we have to look harder!” snapped Kou.

“But where are we supposed to look?!” Rei snapped right back. Kou paused, tapping her chin with a finger. Haruka and Nagisa exchanged glances, but Haru merely shrugged his shoulders and Nagisa said nothing, his eyes on Kou and Rei.

“Maybe we could go back to having joint practice with Samezuka Academy,” mused Kou. “They certainly have more professional experience than we do.”

That was the point when Haru climbed out of the pool and stepped over to them. Kou and Rei fell silent as they looked to him in anticipation. However, all Haru told them was,

“Not necessary.”

He then turned away, heading back towards the starting block without another word. Rei narrowed his eyes.

“If only we were all as naturally gifted as you, Haruka-senpai…” he muttered in a dry tone, and if Haru had heard him, he pretended not to. He dived in with a splash to leave their loud chatter behind. Kou sighed.

“Seriously…” she moaned, but her determination to improve the swim club’s chances at prefecturals proved far greater than her disappointment in Haruka’s input. “Well then, I guess we’ll just have to make do with what we have. Training regimens and information!”

“Information..?” blurted Rei and Nagisa in synch. Kou smirked as she slapped her hand on her hip.

“While the four of you swam in the ocean, I was busy scouting the Samezuka swim team and gathered information on the upcoming tournament entries!” she told them with glowing pride.

“Did you use sex appeal again?” asked Nagisa, but Kou gave her a glare so fierce Nagisa lifted his hands in defeat at once.

“ _No sex appeal involved!_ ”

“So that’s why you kept disappearing during our circuits…” said Rei with a flat look, but even he could put no dent in Kou’s cheerfulness, nor excite any feelings of guilt for abandoning the team for a plethora of muscles and Mikoshiba Seijuurou.

“You could have stayed with us and taken pictures of us training,” whined Nagisa.

“I took plenty of pictures, you just haven’t seen them yet,” Kou informed him with a grin. “I’ll have them printed tomorrow so I can show you guys on Wednesday! I should be able to compile everything by lunch time!”

“Will we get to hear your information then, or now?” asked Rei.

“I will tell you then, because I also collected visual information that you need to see,” replied Kou with gleaming eyes.

“Visual information…” echoed Rei, his left eye twitching.

“That’s our resourceful manager!” laughed Nagisa. Kou flashed them a victory sign.

“You can thank Makoto-senpai,” she told them with a serious look. “If it hadn’t been for him, I wouldn’t have had an excuse to go in the first place, but now I have a whole booklet full of super secret data that will help us at the tournament!”

“Awesome!” cried Nagisa with his fists in the air. Rei’s lips joined his eye in twitching.

“Intrigue, seduction, espionage… _what is our swim club SINKING TO!!_ ” he cried with his hands tearing into his hair, but Kou proceeded to ignore him, and Nagisa was far too curious about Kou’s findings to disapprove of her methods.

* * *

True to her word, Kou sent Rei a text on Tuesday evening that she would meet them all on the roof on Wednesday to show her pictures and information booklet. Rei frowned at the idea once again, but being a dutiful vice-captain, he rolled over on his bed to tell Nagisa, who took out his own phone and texted Makoto. Rei told him he would text Haruka then, but Nagisa told him not to, that Mako-chan was as certain to relay the message to Haru-chan as Nagisa was to have Iwatobi Cream Bread for lunch the next day. Rei was tempted to tell him he would be fixing him lunch, then. In his humble opinion, that cream bread was an abomination and the school should have stopped selling it to students ages ago. However, as Rei did not wish to dispute Makoto’s reliability, he left the matter to him, and awaited the next day with a sense of impending doom. He need not have worried so much, though. To Nagisa’s delight, Makoto proved to be a dependable messenger, so he and Haruka showed up to the roof just a few minutes after Nagisa and Rei, the four of them sitting down by the wall to eat lunch until Kou graced them with her presence.

“Everyone, the pictures are here as promised!” she announced with a grin as she walked over to them with a folder and booklet under her arm.

“Lemme see, lemme see!” cried Nagisa as they all set down their bentos – and a half-eaten Iwatobi Cream Bread – to gather in a half-circle around their manager, who opened the folder, pulled out a stack of photographs, then started laying them down on the ground, beginning with pictures of the leisurely moments of the Iwatobi training camp. There was a range of fun moments captured on camera. Nagisa and Haru making faces, Haruka and Makoto sitting on the shore together at sunset, several pictures of Makoto flexing on Kou’s command, a sleeping Rei with unflattering marker scribbles on his face, and even a group picture of the four of them striking poses, orchestrated by Nagisa.

“Oh wow, you did take a whole bunch,” breathed Nagisa in awe. Makoto laughed.

“Everybody’s having so much fun!”

“Oooh, look at this! Haru-chan has a funny look on his face! And here he’s looking at the camera for a change!” pointed Nagisa. Haru gave him a frown, but Makoto broke into a warm smile that had Haru color and turn his head. Fortunately for him, Rei successfully stole everyone’s attention by picking up a photo and visibly cringing as though he had touched something dirty.

“What is with this picture?! It’s not beautiful at all!” he cried as he whapped the offending photograph with the back of his fingers, then held it up for them to either explain the injustice, or at least commiserate with him over having been caught on camera just as Nagisa was fastening an inflatable floating device on his back.

“Um, preserving the moment?” said Kou with a sheepish giggle. Rei lowered the photograph with a scandalized expression, placing it face down on the ground. Meanwhile, Nagisa picked up another picture of him and Makoto – and something in the back…

“Look here,” he said with a gasp, his finger hovering by Makoto’s smiling face. “ _There’s something behind Mako-chan!_ ”

Makoto cried out in horror at the sight of a white, monstrous blob looming over his shoulder, its face melted like wax. Kou rolled her eyes.

“Oh, that’s just Amakata-sensei, she’s wearing a hyaluronic acid pack.”

“Hiyalu what?” asked Nagisa.

“Hyaluronic acid,” replied Rei with a flat look.

“Don’t scare me, Nagisa!” whined Makoto, and Nagisa paused for a moment in remembrance of that fateful night at training camp. However, as Haru seemed to be paying no attention to Makoto, having become invested in another series of pictures Kou was busy laying out for them, Nagisa took it as a sign that there was no need to worry about Makoto’s condition anymore. Especially not when, giant as he was, he turned out to be quite the scaredy cat.

“Sorry about that,” Nagisa told him, then broke into a scream that had Makoto screeching in alarm. Rei nudged Nagisa in the side.

“Can you keep it down?” he scolded. “There are others on the roof too, you know.”

While Nagisa was busy raising a commotion, then busy apologizing to Rei and making promises of staying relatively quiet, Kou managed to cover another empty patch of ground with photographs that were obviously taken at the island’s indoor pool. Swimsuits and Samezuka tracksuit jackets everywhere, a thumbs up from the Captain himself with an unimpressed Nitori hovering in the background, and even a picture of Rin from the back, taken as he was adjusting his swimming cap. Haruka reached out and picked up his photo. Makoto glanced over to him, then almost wished he didn’t.

“So you took pictures of the entire swim team?” asked Nagisa, sounding impressed. Kou nodded with pride.

“Yup! And don’t think they are random pictures, either. Look at these,” she said as she began to form clusters of the photographs. “These are the swimmers who will be in the one-hundred and two-hundred meter breaststroke with Nagisa-kun. Over here are the swimmers who will swim the one-hundred and two-hundred meter butterfly with Rei-kun, and these are the swimmers who specialize in backstroke, Makoto-senpai,” she explained as she pointed them out, then gently pushed the photographs in their direction. “I don’t have all of their individual swimming styles and relevant information yet, but here are some sheets to go with them,” she went on as she fished a few folded papers from her booklet, placed them next to the pictures, then unfolded them to reveal hand-drawn tables with notes in the boxes. Rei and Nagisa hummed at her meticulous note-taking. Makoto creased his brow.

“Oh, and Haruka-senpai,” said Kou at last, “these are the front crawl swimmers, and Onii-chan will be in—”

“The hundred meter free,” said Haruka, completing the sentence. Makoto pursed his lips. Kou blinked, but then flushed and broke into a wide smile.

“That’s right. He didn’t enter any other events, just so he could focus on his race with you.”

Makoto stole a glance at her, his face dark and puzzled, but before he could do or say anything, Nagisa sprang up from his seat by Haruka’s side to hurry over to his side instead. Nagisa plopped down next to him, raised his hand to whisper in his ear, and when Makoto obediently leaned over, Nagisa told him,

“Haru-chan says he doesn’t care about his times or winning races, but he’s motivated when he’s racing Rin-chan.”

When Makoto turned to look at him, Haru was still holding that photograph of Rin standing by the poolside like some oiled Greek statue. He seemed completely engrossed in the image. Makoto creased his brow in pained concern, but Haru’s expression betrayed nothing beyond calm anticipation. Indeed, his composure only broke when a gust of wind swept past them, tearing the picture out of his hand. Makoto and Rei slammed their hands down on the rest of the photographs to keep them from flying away, while Nagisa jumped up to snatch back Rin’s picture with no success. As for Haru, he remained where he was, his eyes now fixed on the open sky. As much as he might have denied it, he was looking forward to swimming with Rin, and in light of how important the hundred meter freestyle turned out to be for him, the vice-captain finally forgave Haruka for not entering the two-hundred meter front crawl event.

* * *

Captain Mikoshiba proved understanding as well, though he knew little of Rin’s history beyond what he could glean from Kou, who scattered hints that Rin and Nanase Haruka had once been rivals, and were now preparing for prefecturals accordingly. It was a selfish reason, which alerted the captain to the idea that Matsuoka might not be a team player after all, no matter how much he qualified for anything from individual strokes to relays, but for Kou-san’s sake, Seijuurou let this first instance slide with a good grace. He would not force Matsuoka into things he had no inclination to do, not when he was putting an extraordinary amount of effort into the one thing he set his sights on. If anything, it gave Seijuurou hope that once Matsuoka completed his business, he would commit himself just as hard to future endeavors, and since there would be no shortage of future events he could enter, the captain could bear to be patient with him for a while longer.

Nitori, however, could not.

When he began training, he entertained the idea of entering the individual medley. Aiichiro even spoke of it to some of his teammates and his senpai, in the hopes of encouraging himself by making a statement in front of several witnesses. However, despite exerting himself at Samezuka’s training camp, his times had hardly improved, and after his first timing on their return, the event he had been most interested in permanently slipped from his grasp. At the advice of his captain, he was forced to settle on another event in shameful silence, and was now preparing for it with all his might. Nevertheless, no matter how hard he worked, his thoughts kept whirling back to his senpai, how fast, strong, and talented Matsuoka Rin was squandering his talent on a single event, as though he were capable of no more than that. It was insulting to his brilliance, his limitless potential, and it pulled Aiichiro’s face into a bitter frown as he watched his senpai swim front crawl, up and down the impressive length of the Samezuka indoor pool.

Rin was drawing near, and soon hoisted himself up and out of the water. Despite his own gloomy mood, Aiichiro sprung up to hand him a towel. Rin took it without so much as looking. Nitori took a breath to steel himself.

“Matsuoka-senpai,” he began his assault, “why did you only enter the one-hundred meter freestyle for prefecturals? Your best event is backstroke, and you’ve posted great times in it.”

Rin lowered the towel to reveal a pair of hard red eyes.

“You just focus on your own event,” he said in a quiet but dismissive tone. “You swim the individual medley, right?”

“I entered the four-hundred meter freestyle!” Nitori informed him in a defiant tone. “I wanted to enter the hundred meter, but our school has a lot of swimmers who are faster than me…”

His foot shifted slightly against the tiles as his voice trailed off in embarrassment, but a moment later, he put his foot forward again.

“But _you’re_ good enough to participate in free or backstroke, or any other event you want, so _why?_ ”

Rin pressed the towel to his face. Aiichiro continued to stare at him, his lips parting as an unhappy thought crossed his mind.

“…Is it because of Nanase-san?”

There was no answer. The next voice Nitori heard was Captain Mikoshiba’s.

“Oi, what’s wrong?” called out Seijuurou as he walked over to them in nothing but his speedo and goggles. Nitori turned around immediately.

“Captain, I just—” he began, but before he could finish, Rin cut him off.

“Nothing’s wrong,” he said flatly, tossing his towel back at Nitori before he walked off towards the starting blocks. Seijuurou stared after him, but his face seemed calm. Aiichiro’s hand clenched around the towel.

“Why didn’t you say anything to Matsuoka-senpai? If you told him to, he might have entered more events!” he told the captain in a hard tone, who quirked his brow in surprise and turned his head to look at Nitori.

“Why are _you_ so upset?” he asked, neither upset nor loud, but Aiichiro winced at his own foolishness and turned his head with a sad frown. The next moment, he heard a splash. His eyes twitched up, to see Rin slither across the water as he broke into another lap of front crawl.

“Well, I’m sure he has his reasons,” said Seijuurou in a quiet tone, turning away from Nitori to watch Rin swim. Aiichiro pursed his lips and hung his head. As much as the captain involved him in tasks and his senpai accepted his services, their words were ample proof that neither listened to him, nor did they care that Rin was wasting himself on Nanase Haruka.


	35. EPISODE 7: One Style Final! - Part 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just like Nitori Aiichiro, Makoto had his qualms about Haru and Rin’s upcoming race, now that their face-off seemed absolutely certain, and Haru focused all his energies on the hundred-meter front crawl. However, unlike Nitori, who was brave enough to voice his frustrations to a senior that had kept him in terrified awe for months, Makoto couldn’t so much as open his mouth to talk to his best friend. The bottom of the well was no longer dry. A new brand of poison emerged from the cracks to seep into Makoto’s mind, until he felt as though his mouth were dry wood and his tongue were tinder: that one word could spark a flame and he would burn alive.

As for Haru, he became more and more taciturn himself, his eyes always upon the horizon. Every day, they walked home in silence, and each time they said their goodbyes at the bottom of the stone stairs, Haruka would turn towards the single torii above without a moment’s hesitation. Not that there was anything urgent about his stride as he climbed the steps. _No,_ Makoto could discern no agitation or desire to flee. Haru was simply too preoccupied ( _with someone else…_ ) to think of him.

Kou, Nagisa, and Rei, on the other hand, considered the race a promising development, so each encouraged Haruka to prepare for it in their own special ways. Rei commended Haru for practicing so diligently, often commenting on his beautiful technique. Nagisa would not stop talking about how excited he was to see Rin-chan in a week, and Kou of course was overjoyed at the idea that Onii-chan would get to swim with his friend again. Yet no matter how cheerful they sounded, or how much they expected Makoto to be just as happy as they were, he felt no gladness for either party, and forced his smiles in increasing wretchedness. No matter how he looked at the race, there would be a loser in the end regardless of the outcome. If Haru won, it would be Rin, who might turn out to be a sore loser again and hurt Haru, and Makoto couldn’t possibly want that. But if Rin won, then the loser would be Haru, which he also protested with all his heart… And if somehow both got exactly what they wanted, and moved forward together, then the loser might be Makoto, who had no hopes of competing with a bond that stretched deeper than his own.

 _In the end, you might have been nothing but a spare_ , a voice in the back of his head told him, a voice Makoto had been struggling to resist for years. It came to him inevitably after each failed attempt to find the one true friend he was longing for, and each year, it was just a little harder to fight it off and cast it back into the abyss. Like his fear of the water, it lingered in wait, striking when Makoto least expected it. All it took was a few words or a bitter memory, and Makoto would feel it scratching at the nape of his neck, burrowing around his heart in the dark, and whenever the voice found him alone… oh, that was _dangerous_. There were times when he ran home every day after school, racing to unite with his loved ones before the voice might get to him, but those times seemed to be a thing of the past. He had friends now who cared for him, or at the very least he had teammates who counted on him, and while there was even one glimmer of hope that he was needed, Makoto felt he could bear his sorry situation for a little while longer.

* * *

Fortunately for Makoto, practice and exams took up enough time to dull his pain. Come the last day before the tournament, a Friday that also marked their final day of exams, Makoto even managed to muster enough spirit after practice to suggest that they all pay their respects at the Misagozaki shrine before the big day. After cramming for his exams for weeks till he was positively starved for company, Nagisa latched onto the idea like a lifesaver. Rei thought it an excellent way to boost morale and thanked Makoto for the idea, while Haru simply shrugged and tagged along, having no reason to protest going just a few turns higher than his usual route. Even Kou agreed to accompany them, more excited to get a fortune from the shrine than anything else. While she did that, the others paid their respects in coin, rang the bell, then clasped their hands together for a short prayer.

“We should get fortunes too,” suggested Nagisa once they straightened and lowered their hands again. “Maybe we’ll get lucky!”

“Do you really believe in that stuff?” asked Makoto with a small laugh. Haru gave him a look and turned his head.

“I certainly don’t! It’s nothing but probability and.. superstition…” insisted Rei, his words gradually losing steam as Haruka walked right past him in search of his own fortune. Rei stared after him for a while, then turned to look at the others with a puzzled expression, but when Nagisa merely shrugged and sank down onto the steps by the foot of the shrine, Rei and Makoto settled down to join him.

“Less than twenty-four hours until the prefectural tournament,” said Rei at last to break the silence. “Time certainly flew by very fast…”

“Yeah.. I can’t believe we’ll get to see Rin-chan tomorrow!” said Nagisa. Makoto turned his head ever so slightly. “But he won’t be swimming backstroke or the medley relay… is it because Haru-chan isn’t in those?”

Makoto clenched his jaw, imagining Matsuoka Rin as a dark shadow. Wherever Haruka went, Rin would loom close behind him, and if Haru didn’t move, Rin would be still as well. Was that how they had always been? Was that what rivalry really meant, that one could never move forward without the other..?

“Probably so,” replied Rei, “but if that really was his reason, it means he sacrificed every other possible event for the hundred-meter front crawl, and won’t advance to regionals unless he places at his event… and the same is true for Haruka-senpai, since he isn’t competing in any other event either.”

“I know this is important to Haru-chan, but I wish it weren’t so we could have signed up for the relay,” moaned Nagisa.

“It is a shame,” nodded Rei, “but perhaps it really is best to focus on our individual strengths for now, and hope that at least one of us advances to give our club good publicity.”

Nagisa made a face and propped his head in his hand. His eyes wandered to Makoto, who had been sitting in silence. Makoto was staring off into space. Nagisa quirked his brow.

“What about you, Mako-chan?” he said, waiting patiently for Makoto to realize he had been prompted. “Would you have liked to swim a relay with us?”

Makoto twitched, his eyes large, but after a moment of hesitation, he lowered his head and nodded.

“Yeah,” came his quiet answer. Nagisa and Rei turned to each other wide-eyed, then to Makoto again with a happy gasp and grins on their faces.

“Would you really swim a medley relay if you could, Makoto-san?!” cried Rei. “What inspired you? Was it our exceptional camaraderie, or was it the beauty of our individual strokes?”

“Well, I—”

“For my part, I rented a video of the Olympics when I was ten years old, and it was beautiful to watch four athletes swimming different styles in succession to win together,” continued Rei with the same breath, unable to contain his enthusiasm at the thought that they had completely converted Makoto through team work and individual excellence.

“I was especially impressed by how beautiful the butterfly form was when touching the wall,” he carried on, his fists clenching in excitement until he thrust his arms upward and forward like a swimmer aiming for the wall, not noticing how he startled the others with his sudden movements. “Personally, I think it’s very important that your finish be beautiful, and back then that video showed me that athletes around the world felt the same way—”

“Huh?!” cried out Kou in the distance, cutting off Rei before he could properly finish, and sparing Makoto the discomfort of having to reply, _I just want to feel like I belong as much as possible_. “What is this, Haruka-senpai?”

Spurred by curiosity, Nagisa sprung up from his seat and abandoned the stairs to find Kou and Haruka. The moment he moved away, Rei chased after him, so Makoto had no choice but to follow as well.

Upon his arrival, he found the source of the commotion was Haruka, who had apparently received a rather strange fortune from the shrine.

“Half luck?” mumbled Kou as the others came hurrying over.

“Huh? What’s going on?” said Nagisa, all of them peering over Haruka’s shoulder to see his fortune.

“Half luck?” asked Makoto. “Never seen that before.”

“Does that mean that only one half of your luck is good?” asked Rei with his brow quirked.

“What’s the other half?” wondered Kou.

“It’s the rest!” said Nagisa with a grin.

“That doesn’t make any sense, Nagisa-kun,” scolded Rei, none of them heeded anymore by Haruka, who began to peruse his fortune in silence.

_Focus on your studies._

_Your business will do well._

_You’ll make lots of good memories._

_You will be reunited with the person you want to see._

_Try not to lose anything._

_You will make good friends._

_Your wishes will come true with help from others._

Haru stared at the predictions in disdain, especially the fifth fortune, but just as he could feel his features harden, he heard the cries of a predator flying overhead. He lifted his eyes to the sky, wondering if it was an omen… his impending freedom.

* * *

Nagisa, Rei, and Makoto could eventually be persuaded by Kou to get their own fortunes. Nagisa got Good Luck ( _Told you we might get lucky!_ ), Rei Bad Luck ( _This was a complete waste of time!_ ), and Makoto got a fortune he kindly refused to share, tucking it inside his pocket for safe keeping. The others were somewhat disappointed by his secrecy, but as evening drew closer, the first-years had no more time to spare if they wanted to catch their evening trains. They rushed down the stone stairs one by one, leaving Haru and Makoto to walk down to their houses together, silent once again until they reached the path leading to Haruka’s house.

“Night,” said Haru to his friend, in the same emotionless tone that had coated his every word for over a week, but as he turned towards his front door, Makoto’s fingers clenched in desperation.

“Haru..!”

Haruka blinked. He turned his head back just enough to catch Makoto’s eye, half wishing he could just go upstairs and lie down to sleep.

“Will you be alright, Haru?” asked Makoto, whose hands found each other and clasped together in front of him. Haru stared back at him confused, then surprised. Had Makoto been worrying about him? Worried about Rin..?

 _What about me?_ he asked himself. _Am I worried..?_

He didn’t feel worried so much as impatient, like a songbird in a small cage waiting for someone to open the door.

“I’ll be fine,” he managed to say in a firm tone, but his words could not smooth out the creases of Makoto’s brow, or give his pale cheeks color.

“I was just thinking that, last time—”

“This will be different,” replied Haruka with uncharacteristic patience. “I’ll race Rin and then we’ll move on.”

And yet Makoto continued to stand there staring at him, as though his feet had frozen to the ground. Haru sighed.

“It will be fine,” he said. “I just need to do this one last time.”

Makoto clenched his jaw, but after a short pause, his face smoothed out in resignation.

“Alright, Haru. If this is what you really want, I’ll support you,” he said with a grave expression that left no room for his smile or that small sideways tilt of the head, but strange as Makoto looked whenever he turned solemn and serious, Haru found the idea oddly comforting. Makoto was reliable, attentive, and alert – he would be exactly what Haru needed to have as little on his hands the next day as possible. His lips curled into a smile, and though Makoto did not smile back, his features softened a little.

“Good night,” said Haru, his tone a little warmer.

“Good night, Haru,” replied Makoto, and as Haru did not turn away from him at once, he finally broke into a defeated smile as he walked down the stairs towards the gate, followed until his final step by a pair of dark blue eyes.

* * *

There was little room for conversation as the first-years hurried down to the station. In the end, all the boys could afford was a hurried _See you tomorrow!_ to Kou before she ran off to her train, but once Nagisa and Rei boarded their own train, they finally had a chance to catch their breath. They travelled until their usual stop, then walked down their shared route in growing silence, but when Rei stopped at the final juncture between their homes and casually said, _This is it_ , a cold chill spilled inside Nagisa.

“Well, see you tomorrow, Nagisa-kun,” said Rei with a content smile. He then proceeded to turn away, but he could hardly manage a few steps before Nagisa reached out to grab him by the wrist.

“Rei-chan, _don’t go!_ ”

His voice sounded almost savage. Rei turned back to him at once, his brow quirked. Nagisa released him and tried for a hopeful smile.

“Can I come with you? Can I spend the night..?”

Rei blinked.

“No, you cannot, Nagisa-kun,” he said with a stern expression. “Not yet, at any rate. You are still wearing your uniform and carrying your schoolbag, and I do believe you haven’t packed yet for the tournament. Weren’t you telling me earlier how you were going to pack later tonight?”

Nagisa forced a laugh. Leave it to Rei-chan to be so precise about details, and remember the smallest things Nagisa said during the day and then forgot about within five minutes.

“Oh alright, I haven’t packed yet. I’ll do it when I get home, but can I come after? I was just thinking it would be nice to spend the night with Rei-chan when such an important day is coming up,” he began, straining to keep his tone light and innocent. “I get shivers from all the excitement and Rei-chan’s strong arms would keep me safe and warm..”

“It’s July and no house is particularly cold at this time of year…” mumbled Rei with red cheeks.

“Your calm composure would help soothe my nerves..”

“I’m actually rather nervous about tomorrow, Nagisa-kun—”

“And if you let me, I promise not to kick you in your sleep!”

“What kind of promise is that and how would you possibly keep it once you’re asleep?!”

“Well, you always complain about me kicking when I never complain about you snoring,” pouted Nagisa.

“ _I DO NOT!_ ” shrieked Rei. “I would never emit such vile sounds in my sleep!”

“Fine, fine, I won’t mention your snoring again if you let me stay for the night!” replied Nagisa with a sugar-sweet smile. “Please..?”

“Nagisa-kun…” sighed Rei. He turned his head a little, but when he glanced down, Nagisa’s hands had clasped together, his eyes wide and gleaming. It was a dangerous look, or so Rei believed. After all, it no longer worked on anyone else but him.

“ _Please…?_ ” whispered Nagisa. Rei’s shoulders slumped as his face fell in defeat.

“I suppose, if you really want to..” he muttered in reply.

“Then I will pack and see you soon! Thank you, Rei-chan!” cried Nagisa, then with a wave of his hand, he rushed down the street to make good on his promise. If he wanted permission to stay over at his friend’s place, he needed talk to his mother before his sisters might come and hog her like they always did, or gang up on him and rile him up about the tournament tomorrow. Rei might have been worried ( _how odd_ ), but Nagisa was downright anxious. Just like Makoto, he often felt himself to be the weakest link in their chain, and the last thing he needed was his sisters’ teasing, or falling victim to one of their nasty pranks. Luckily for him, Rei was no mind reader. He saw little more in Nagisa’s actions than a friend starved for socialization after weeks of studying nonstop.

“See you soon, Nagisa-kun..!” Rei called out after him, then turned to walk home, his brow furrowed as he gathered his thoughts. What was he to do on such short notice? Was there enough lean chicken breast in the fridge for two…?

* * *

The moment he closed the door behind himself as softly as possible, Nagisa slipped into the kitchen with hurried steps, to find his mother standing by the counter, a ball of lettuce unraveling into slim ribbons under the constant chopping of her cleaver. No one else in sight. Nagisa took a deep breath.

“I’m home,” he said to his mother’s back, just loud enough to announce himself and low enough not to be heard further down the hall. He then said in the same breath, his voice a little desperate already, “Mom, can I go over to Rei-chan’s for the night?”

“Sure, sweetheart,” came the calm reply, “after we had a nice family dinner.”

 _No…_ “But, Mom—”

“It’s almost ready and everyone’s home, even your father finished on time.”

“But, I need to pack and then talk to Rei-chan about the tournament—”

“You will talk to _Rei-chan_ after you had dinner with everyone else.”

Her words sounded final, and to add insult to injury, another voice joined the conversation despite Nagisa’s every attempt to remain under the radar.

“Is Rei-chan your girlfriend, Nagicchi?” asked his sister Nanako in a sing-song tone as she snuck up on still smaller Nagisa and pulled him into a headlock, her knuckles pressed against his head. She gave him a hard rub and Nagisa let out a hiss, grabbing her arm, but going no further. Even if he could tug it off his neck, two more pairs of arms might come to replace it in the blink of an eye, and as much as Nagisa had grown (or _as little_ , he sometimes thought as he looked at Rei), he was still no match for an older sister, let alone three.

He settled for telling Nanako to let him go as quietly as he could, hoping his mother would turn around to scold her, but she seemed absolutely engrossed in composing the perfect salad for their pork cutlets.

“He’s his friend, isn’t he Nagisa, that boy with the red glasses? Ryuugazaki-kun,” she said in a mild tone. Nanako’s knuckles stopped drilling against Nagisa’s scalp.

“He’s that nerd, isn’t he? The weirdo that always wants everything to be beautiful,” she laughed.

By the time she finished, Nagisa gritted his teeth and finally yanked at her arm, hard enough to pry it loose.

“ _Don’t call him that!_ ” he snapped, louder than he meant to, louder than he was allowed.

“ _Nagisa!_ ”

Of course his mother would turn back right then, to see Nagisa clutching his sister’s arm with her having drawn away from him as though she were trying to flee. Nagisa’s eyes widened.

“She called him names,” he pleaded, but it was no use.

“Is Nagisa being a baby again?” came another voice further away, another sister that could not be bothered to come over in the middle of her favorite romance route.

“Yeah, he is,” replied Nanako with her voice raised, though it had since lost its playful edge. “Lighten up, Nagicchi…” she whispered to her brother, her features now carefully guarded except for the confused arch of her brow. Nagisa frowned.

“ _Nagisa-kun..!_ ” they heard his father a moment later from the living room, no doubt looking up from his paper and contemplating whether he should intervene or not. Nagisa stiffened at once. His fingers twitched, then slipped from Nanako’s arm. She shook her head and left the kitchen for her room. Nagisa cautiously glanced to his mother.

She was staring at him with her brow creased, one hand propped on her hip. Nagisa’s fingers curled into fists beside him.

“She called him names,” he repeated himself, even though it was no use. His mother sighed.

“Nagisa, you’re not five anymore,” was her reply, and when Nagisa’s lips pursed into a bitter frown, she walked over and kissed his forehead briefly, then patted his cheek, both gestures feeling like a routine, the everyday practice of calming a fussy child. “Set the table for me, will you, sweetheart?”

And so Nagisa set the table, laying out all the mats and plates and utensils like a good boy. He then sat down with his family to eat in complete silence, glad there was still another week before his report card would be issued because his father could hardly wait to peruse it, right at the table in front of everyone over another ‘nice family dinner.’ If he could just avoid looking at them until they finished and he could be excused, things would be fine. Then, afterwards, if he locked himself away in his room as soon as he entered it, packing wouldn’t take long…

“So what was the commotion about?” their father asked somewhat abruptly between a bite of pork and a sip of water, just when Nagisa thought he had forgotten about having yelled at his son from across the apartment. Nagisa’s hand flinched with a slight knock of his chopsticks, but Nanako flashed her father a well-practiced smile.

“Nothing, papa,” she said with a barely perceivable wink towards Nagisa, who had stopped eating and now sat with both hands clenched into fists under the table.

“I heard you all talk about Nagisa-kun. What was it this time?”

Nagisa’s eyes began to dull. Nanako’s face softened into a pensive look.

“Nothing. I was just teasing him, papa,” she said at last. Over the years, there had been quite a few variants of that answer ( _Nagisa was being a baby_ , _Nagisa was being whiny_ , _Nagisa can’t take a joke_ ), but for special occasions, Nanako would let the blame fall where it truly lay, and tomorrow’s tournament was a special occasion, even if none of them were going to attend it and watch Nagisa swim. It was all Nagisa had been talking about, whenever she did manage to overhear him on her way to the kitchen or past her little brother’s room, which he kept closed if there was more than one person at home. Funny how he was always avoiding them now…

“You were winding him up again,” replied their father as he resumed eating. “And you, you always let her get to you and make a fool of yourself,” he continued, pointing his chopsticks at Nagisa. “A real man wouldn’t get wound up so easily by a bunch of girls.”

Nagisa clenched his jaw, but said nothing. It wasn’t as though being a guy, joining the swim club, or bringing home good grades would ever make him a ‘real man.’ Not to _him_ , so Nagisa merely continued to sit there with his fists clenched, until all attention turned away from him at last. For a fleeting moment, he wondered if his friends would even recognize him if they saw him now, anxious and oppressed by the smallest glance from his parents or his siblings, who were supposed to love him.

When everyone was finished, Nagisa asked to be excused. He was allowed to leave the table, from whence he went straight to his room and turned the lock.

* * *

Ten minutes later, he left, a hastily stuffed duffel bag thumping against his back as he ran all the way to Rei’s apartment, keenly conscious he had kept his friend waiting much longer than originally planned. He should have known a Friday evening would see all of his sisters home from college and work, but was that really an excuse? Would Rei-chan be angry with him..?

He rushed down the open hall and rang the bell, shifting from one foot to another. In a few seconds, Rei answered, already dressed in his favorite butterfly pajamas.

“I expected you sooner, Nagisa-kun! Now your dinner is completely cold!” Rei began chiding him as soon as he ushered Nagisa inside and closed the door.

To his surprise, there were no excuses this time, no laughs or smiles or waves of the hand. Instead, Nagisa lowered his eyes to the ground, his hands guiltily clasped together.

“Sorry, Rei-chan..” he said quietly. Rei shook his head a little, then broke into a lenient smile.

“Well, I suppose you could always eat it for breakfast, and you are just in time for dessert.”

“Dessert..?” echoed Nagisa, his eyes growing wide as he lifted his head to look at the other. Rei adjusted his glasses with a proud smirk.

“I prepared a special low-calorie vanilla mousse! It has a silky, delicate texture that goes especially well with strawberries.”

Nagisa stared at him wordlessly, his eyes stinging something awful. His lips twitched into a wobbly grin as he pounced Rei, clinging fiercely to the folds of his ridiculously purple pajama shirt.

“Strawberries are my favorite,” he said in a thick tone. Rei’s face softened into a gentle smile.

“I know…” he whispered to Nagisa, who did his best to show his gratitude by savoring his dessert, rather than devouring it in obscenely large spoonfuls like he usually did.

* * *

When all dishes had been washed and it was time to lie down, Nagisa veritably burrowed into Rei’s bed. He only stopped and stretched out by the wall, pulling one of Rei’s pillows under his head. Rei rolled his eyes, but simply climbed in after him – he had long stopped suggesting that Nagisa take the futon he kept for guests. Ever since Rei had first invited him at age nine, they had slept together in Rei’s bed, sometimes for warmth, sometimes for fear of the dark, and ultimately for comfort and a sense of belonging.

The moment Rei settled down permanently, Nagisa abandoned the pillow to nudge his head against Rei’s shoulder.

“Rei-chan..”

“Hmm?”

“Did you really mean what you said earlier?”

“What did I say?”

“You said you were nervous about the tournament. Are you really?”

Rei’s face stiffened a little.

“I am, Nagisa-kun.”

Nagisa quirked his brow at him.

“How come?”

“Well.. we haven’t competed in a long time,” mused Rei, his eyes slipping to the ceiling. “This would be our first tournament in years, and I am worried about making a good display and performing well. Not just for my own sake, but for the sake of the entire swim club, and Makoto-san, who is still very new to the world of swimming and slowly opening up to the beauty of different styles and the idea of a relay. Even if I can only swim butterfly and sink any other way, I am still his mentor, and the vice-captain. It’s a lot of responsibility, living up to my position with all these shortcomings…”

“Rei-chan..” mumbled Nagisa, one hand carefully pinching up a fold of Rei’s pajama shirt.

“I was really happy when Makoto-san told us he would have liked to swim the medley relay,” continued Rei. “I am rather disappointed in myself for not realizing it sooner.. If I had known, I would have tried to persuade Haruka-senpai so Makoto-san could share our vision, that sight we once saw together. But now there’s nothing I can do for him.”

Nagisa’s small hand clenched around the fabric.

“That’s not true, Rei-chan,” he said in a determined voice. “You can still do plenty to help Mako-chan. Tomorrow will be his first time swimming at a tournament, and I bet he’ll be nervous and need your help!”

“My help..?”

“Yes, your help! You are experienced, so you can tell him about previous tournaments, and give him tips on how to calm down, and encourage him when he seems doubtful. He’s afraid of water, so we should also try and take his mind off it, and create a comfortable atmosphere for him!”

Rei gave him a doubtful look.

“I’m not sure I’m the sort of person who can create a comfortable atmosphere—”

“Yes, you are!” snapped Nagisa all of a sudden. “You are the most comforting person I know!”

Rei stared at him in surprise. “N-Nagisa-kun..?”

“I don’t even see why you’d be worried about your swimming, you swim a beautiful butterfly and your diving is perfect!” carried on Nagisa passionately, his heart and eyes still stinging from Nanako’s words. “You are smart and capable and you’re the vice-captain for a reason, aren’t you?! You and Haru-chan will definitely swim well! It’s Mako-chan I’m worried about because he’s new and afraid of water, and about me, because I don’t think I’ve improved at all despite the training camp…” he carried on, his voice trailing off into painful silence.

There was a pause as Rei searched Nagisa’s features, then carefully lifted his hand, just enough to slip it across his chest and find Nagisa’s grasping hand.

“Don’t say that, Nagisa-kun,” he said softly as he gave Nagisa’s fist a few reassuring pats. “I am absolutely certain you have improved. Your form is much better now, and your reach is becoming longer. And besides…”

Nagisa finally looked up, his face uncharacteristically tense. Rei tried for a soothing smile.

“…You are the most inspiring person I know.”

Nagisa’s eyes grew wide.

“ _Really…?_ ”

“That’s right,” replied Rei, fixing his glasses for emphasis, then dropping his hand again. “No matter the situation, you are always loud and cheerful and terribly obnoxious, but even when you are exasperating, your enthusiasm is contagious.. and you make me want to try harder every time.”

Nagisa stared at him in shock, then pressed his face into Rei’s shirt. He started laughing uncontrollably, hoping Rei wouldn’t mind if he got his shirt wet in a moment of weakness.

“Stop laughing!” snapped Rei, his cheeks boiling red. “I was trying to pay you a compliment!”

“I found your one fault, Rei-chan, you are terrible at compliments,” laughed Nagisa with tears in his eyes, but when Rei scoffed in reply, Nagisa let go of his pajama shirt to curl his fingers around Rei’s hand instead. Rei huffed. Nagisa nuzzled his shirt just above his heart.

“Rei-chan is my favorite person in the world,” he said in a trembling whisper that left Rei completely speechless except for a wobbling smile… at least until Nagisa’s lips widened in a mischievous grin.

“See, now that is how you pay a compliment,” he said, then smothered a giggle when Rei choked indignantly.

“ _Nagisa-kun..!_ ”

Nagisa grinned.

“Ah, I’m glad I got all that stuff off my chest,” he said in a content purr, relieved he somehow managed to make light of his own deepest feelings before he might have started wondering if Rei felt the same way about him. Even Nanako’s voice faded from his mind, chased away by his own words in praise of Rei-chan. “Now let’s get some sleep before we stay up too long and you wake up with huge black bags under your eyes..!”

“ _I most certainly will not!_ ” shrieked Rei. Nagisa’s shoulders started quaking again in suppressed laughter. Rei huffed, then released Nagisa’s hand just long enough to grab his abandoned pillow, shoving it over his friend’s head. He then placed his hand back where it was, so Nagisa reached for it again.

“Sweet dreams, Rei-chan,” came his muffled voice from underneath the pillow. Rei rolled his eyes.

“Good night, Nagisa-kun,” he mumbled in embarrassment, and within half an hour, he started snoring in an even string of low inhales and whistling exhales that never failed to lull Nagisa to sleep.

* * *

Meanwhile, Kou had a long, agreeable chat with Chigusa about prefecturals and some of the classified visual information in her booklets, until one look at the clock reminded her that she should get some sleep before leaving early. She soon said goodbye to her friend, then sent Rin a text message before going to bed.

**To: Onii-chan**

_Good luck, Onii-chan! Let’s all do our best!_

She received no reply.


	36. EPISODE 7: One Style Final! - Part 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In the final weeks before prefecturals, Aiichiro fared little better than Makoto. With each day of practice, the idea that he was nowhere near as capable as other front crawl swimmers despite his every effort pained him more and more, and though he had given up on persuading his senpai to embrace his full potential, it was increasingly harder to mask his feelings whenever they were together. He continued to wait on Rin by the pool side or the starting blocks as he had done before, his features in a constant flux as though his emotions were crawling in his skin. Every evening he was forced to stare at Rin’s back as he studied, be silent if his senpai wanted peace and quiet, or assist him if he needed his legs held for crunches and sit-ups. But no matter how much Rin relied on him implicitly, he spoke little, and always seemed withdrawn to some distant island of his mind where Aiichiro could not follow him. He had carved his own paths in the rough landscapes of their relationship with unparalleled patience, sometimes feeling he could navigate Rin’s maze better than anyone else at Samezuka Academy, but some lands remained uncharted and their histories unspoken, with too little information to guide him.

Rin himself was retreating inside a shell that admitted no one else, or rather no one but Nanase Haruka and the ghost of twelve-year-old Matsuoka Toraichi, who had won more trophies, medals, and awards for swimming by that age than his son had in the course of his entire life. How many more could his father have won if he had continued to swim? No doubt he would have reached the Olympic stage, he would have stood on the highest rostrum, towering above all the rest with gold after gold medal hung around his neck. He could have been an inspiration, an idol, a god of water whose name rang like a battle cry, _To-rai-chi! To-rai-chi!_

But Matsuoka Toraichi never fulfilled the promise of a thousand golden trophies. Like the angel Lucifer, he had fallen from grace, not into Hell but someplace worse: a life of mediocrity where he married, had children, and soon died an unremarkable death. Would he have been happier if he continued to train and strive for the top? _Yes,_ replied Rin in his head, _of course he would have, he could have been a legend, but he was denied the chance..!_ That had been his conclusion years ago while stranded in Australia without family or success, pining for the latter far worse than the former as the achievements of his English-speaking peers continued to outshine his own.

His conclusion hadn’t changed since. The more he stared at his father’s photograph, at his triumphant grin as he held the golden trophy that looked like a dolphin ( _My favorite trophy…_ ), the more fisherman Toraichi’s smiles and laughs appeared like ugly lies. How could a natural prodigy be content with anything less than his rightful place on top of the world? How could the love of a woman or the first steps of a son and daughter compare to being adored, nay, _worshipped_ by millions, sitting on the spectator benches or their small couches as they chanted his name? Rin could not fathom it, not anymore. All he found in the wake of Toraichi’s death was a pair of shoes he was no longer sure he could fill, a broken legacy that continued to haunt him on sleepless nights. Given the chance to leap through time, he would have grabbed that twelve-year-old by the ribbon of his gold medal and screamed, _Never stop until you achieve your dream! Not for my mother or anyone else!_

The idea that he might not have been born that way was almost comforting, and the thought that Kou would not have existed either never crossed Rin’s mind. His wounds absorbed him far too much to think of her or his mother, to think that perhaps Toraichi chose his own path, and regretted it no more than one regrets choosing a simple meal over a fancy one. Both could fill your stomach if you ate enough, and both could give you the utmost satisfaction if your choice was to your liking, but to Matsuoka Rin, one was clearly superior to the other, despite the bitter taste it left in his mouth.

No amount of stumbling and crawling on his path could dissuade him from pursuing his goal. The fact that Haru could glide on that same path effortlessly while claiming it was not his to take only served to infuriate Rin and deepen his grudge more. His only solace was that Haru now trained in earnest to be an acceptable opponent to him. A victory over Nanase Haruka at his peak would surely put Rin’s mind to rest forever. It would be the triumph of hard work and determination over natural talent, and then he would be haunted by his father’s unrealized potential no more.

* * *

For the rest of the week, Rin could not stop thinking about Toraichi, until on the last day before the relay, he crossed his name off the list of Samezuka swimmers who had signed up to travel to the prefectural tournament by bus. No bus would take him up the hill by his home town, where he owed his father a visit before facing Haru, so he would take his own route, cost what it might. Having a deeply personal reason to be unreasonable, he spoke of his decision to no one, not even the captain or Nitori. The former only realized the day after, but the latter found out that very evening, when he finally mustered the courage to ask if he might sit with Matsuoka-senpai on their way to the stadium.

“I’m not taking the bus,” replied Rin between crunches, which once again required Aiichiro to hold him still by his ankles.

“Eeeh?!” cried Nitori, never letting go of the other despite his shock. “But everyone else is taking the bus! That’s the fastest way to the stadium!”

“I need to go somewhere else first,” replied Rin, his breath growing shorter with each crunch.

“Where are you going?” pressed Nitori.

“What do you care?” huffed Rin without stopping. “Are you gonna stalk me or something?”

“Are you going to see Nanase-san?” asked Nitori, his brow furrowed.

“I’m not!” snapped Rin at his next crunch, which brought his scowling face uncomfortably close to Aiichiro’s. “I told you to stop worrying about me and focus on your own event,” he continued in a dismissive tone.

“But—!”

“ _What is it..?_ ”

Nitori clenched his jaw. He would finally say it. It was now or never.

“I’m.. _upset._ ”

Rin stared back at him as though he were speaking gibberish.

“Huh?” he blurted, his face comically confused, but Aiichiro no longer looked him in the eye.

“You’re only entering the hundred-meter free when you have the ability to do so much more..” he said, his hands clenching helplessly around Rin’s ankles, “…while I can’t even enter my preferred event. I feel so useless…”

His final words cut deeper than Rin would have liked, his expression twitching into one of shock, even hurt. Nitori took one look at him and released him at once, tucking his hands between his legs.

“Sorry if I offended you,” he said quietly. Rin pulled away and shifted to sit on the edge of his bed, facing away from Nitori.

“No,” he managed to reply, but now a painful silence hung over them. Rin’s eyes bore into the floor in discomfort. He could not ignore a fellow sufferer. _Not tonight, anyway._ “You have endurance,” he said at last. “The four-hundred free is a better event for you than the one-hundred.”

Color rushed into Nitori’s cheeks.

“Th-Thank you very much!” he cried in surprise. Rin sighed.

“I’m going to see my dad,” he added, the words coming a little too easily after struggling on his own for so long. Nitori stared at him wide-eyed.

“I um, I thought that your father passed away a long time ago…” he mumbled.

The moment he said it, his stomach coiled into a thousand knots.

“ _No!_ ” he cried teary-eyed, then threw himself across the bed onto Rin, hands grasping at the folds of Rin’s dank tank top. “Don’t do it, Senpai! You can’t die!”

“ _I’m not gonna die!_ ” snapped Rin. “I’m just visiting his grave! What’s wrong with you?!”

Aiichiro’s hands gripped the fabric just a little tighter as he hung his head in shame.

“I’m just anxious…” he mumbled guiltily. “About tomorrow. About my event, and your event, and you..”

Rin’s lips parted, but no sound came out. Was Nitori worried about him all this time?

Perhaps he had left him in the dark for too long… Maybe it wouldn’t hurt if Nitori understood. If he could just understand, they would both be fine.

Rin lifted his hand and pushed at Nitori, just enough to coax him back onto the bed. When the other obediently retreated, Rin dug into his pants pocket. He still had some change from earlier. _Good._

“Come with me,” he said as he stood up from his bed and walked to the door. After a moment’s surprise and hesitation, Nitori sprung up and hurried after him.

* * *

Rin led him to the stairwell, then down in slow, winding steps to the ground floor. There they walked down the length of the hallway leading to the back of the building, greeted by darkness except for the glow of a couple of drink dispensers. A few benches had been installed in the middle, two of them placed right in front of the machines to bathe in their sickly glow. Rin stopped in front of the machines, while Nitori sank down on the bench behind him, his hands clasped in his lap as Senpai reached into his pocket to feed some change into one of the dispensers. Aiichiro heard a thud, then another, and when Rin straightened again, he held two cans of Pocket Sweat soda. He threw one of them to Nitori. Aiichiro just barely managed to catch his free drink.

“Thank you very much,” he said quietly, but received no reply, nor could he catch Rin’s eyes. His senpai was staring into space above Aiichiro’s head even as his finger flicked the can’s top open and he lifted it to his lips to take a long sip.

“I don’t think I ever told you about my dad,” he said in a faraway voice.

“No,” replied Nitori. Rin lowered the can, the soda sloshing inside.

“Apparently, he was the best swimmer in Iwatobi when he was young,” he began, voice low and eyes distant as he moved to sit next to Nitori. “He won tournaments all over the place and brought home lots of trophies and medals. His dream was to become an Olympic swimmer… But he never achieved that dream, because he got married, and had me. Dad became a fisherman to support us. And then he died, just like that. Late one summer, a huge typhoon hit. A lot of fishermen died when their boats sank. My dad was one of them.”

Nitori narrowed his eyes in concern. Rin’s face stiffened.

“I want to achieve the dream my dad never could,” he continued, his hand tightening on the can. It gave and crumpled in his grip. “And there’s someone I have to beat before I can make that happen.”

Nitori twitched. His chest felt cold and hollow, no longer with loneliness but a strange, distant pang of anger.

“Is that Nanase-san?” he asked with furrowed brows. When Rin gritted his teeth, Aiichiro knew he was right, and from that moment, he could no longer see what he once saw at joint practice: the admirable talent of a fellow high school swimmer. In the blink of an eye, Nanase-san fell into shadows and spikes, forming a barrier that kept Senpai from moving forward.

“He has incredible talent,” said Rin with a sneer as his hand crushed the can, “but all he ever talks about is nonsense like how much he loves water and wants to feel it. He doesn’t swim to set records or win events. And yet I still couldn’t…” he breathed, lowering his head like a wounded animal.

“Senpai…” whispered Aiichiro, his heart aching with every beat. The next moment, Rin stirred and rose from his seat. His hand clenched again and the can was flattened for good.

“If I can’t beat him, I can’t move forward,” he said, his tone savage. Nitori’s heart was fluttering in his throat.

“You will,” he said at once in a passionate tone. “You will definitely beat Nanase-san this time, and our whole team will cheer for you as you win!”

 _Tch._ Rin could just barely stop himself from saying he didn’t care who cheered him on, but it would have been useless, even ungrateful. After all, he was no longer completely alone. Someone wished for Haru’s defeat just as much as he did, and if Nitori wanted it to be a spectacle, Rin would give him a show he could be proud of. But first, he needed to rest. He needed every scrap of energy if he was to stand a chance against his rival.

“Let’s go back,” he said calmly. Nitori sprung to follow him back upstairs, and once they both settled down in their beds, Aiichiro curled up in bed with a tired smile, and the sweet promise of a new era with a new, happier Matsuoka Rin, free from the clutches of Nanase Haruka.

* * *

The next morning meant an early rise for many. Unable to sleep and nervous about his own event, Makoto slipped away from his sleeping household for a quick jog before breakfast. Haruka got up at dawn to take a long bath and empty his head, and Rin fled campus to catch the first morning train to his hometown. It was just another part of their preparations, a morning rite on the altar of the gods, but all the while their thoughts kept whirling around each other, filling them with a nervous sizzle of energy. Even Haruka felt it when he surprised himself by being the first to reach the bottom of the stone stairs, his eyes fixed once again on the horizon as he waited for Makoto. His friend appeared a few minutes later, having been told by his mother that she could glimpse someone from the window, wearing a tracksuit what looked just like Makoto’s.

“Sorry to keep you waiting, Haru,” came Makoto’s voice as he passed through the gate, then walked down to meet his friend, greeted by no more than a sideways glance.

“It’s okay,” replied Haru, his eyes fixed forward again as though some inner compass were pulling him in Rin’s direction. Makoto forced a smile.

“Today’s the big day,” he said in calm cheerfulness, more for his friend’s sake than his own. Haru nodded, and when he turned towards the path leading to the station, Makoto joined him, falling into rhythm by his side as easily as birds take flight, unaware that not too far away, Rin was climbing the hill on the opposite side of the bay they now crossed, making his way towards a narrow ledge. At the very end of that ledge stood his family’s grave, his father’s final resting place after the ocean. Rin stopped in front of it, then stood there for a long while before he could manage to speak.

“Today is the day of the prefectural tournament,” he said to the cold stone, imagining not the fisherman, or the father who once cradled him and mussed his hair, but that twelve-year-old boy from his nightmares, who would not stop running until Rin surpassed him and started running in his place, taking the baton so Toraichi could be free.

“I will face Haru again, one last time,” continued Rin, his voice growing quiet as his heart hammered furiously beneath the Samezuka jacket. His hand clenched into a soft fist, then twitched upward to bonk softly against the stone, as though it were a petrified fist waiting to meet his. His father used to bump fists with him all the time, and when Rin grew a little older, the gesture came to him naturally once he befriended Sousuke…

Why was he still thinking about Sousuke? Was it because the ghosts of your past never go away? Would his mistakes keep haunting him forever..?

_No. Not anymore. Starting today._

“Watch me, dad,” he spoke again, his voice growing softer as he imagined that twelve-year-old boy squirm around, waiting to be free. “I’m going to win.”

* * *

Nagisa and Rei had an early start themselves, leaving enough time for a morning shower, Nagisa’s large and luxurious breakfast in the form of last night’s cold dinner, and a morning energy salad for Rei. By the time Haru and Makoto arrived at the station, their friends were waiting for them, parked in front of one of the advertisement boards, which currently featured a large map of the summer attractions of Iwatobi town.

“Haru-chan! Mako-chan! Over here!” cried Nagisa with a wave of his hand, until Makoto noticed him and lifted a slow hand to wave back. Haru did not so much as look at the others, but he didn’t have to. He simply followed Makoto’s steps, then stopped when he did to continue staring at the ground.

“Lookie, lookie,” said Nagisa at once with his finger pointed in Makoto’s face. “Mako-chan didn’t get much sleep last night!”

If there was anything meaningful about his tone or words, they completely missed their mark. Makoto merely let out a nervous chuckle and turned his head slightly, failing to notice how Haruka finally lifted his head to peer at him, his brow creasing at the dark crescents he hadn’t noticed before. He then let his gaze drop to the concrete. Rei rolled his eyes.

“If only everyone had nerves of steel like you, Nagisa-kun…” he muttered under his breath. Nagisa laughed awkwardly as he turned back to Makoto.

“Don’t worry, Mako-chan, you’ll get there soon enough,” he said with a modest look and a wave of his hand. “Just relax, relax!”

“It’s too late to tell Makoto-san to relax when he has lost several hours of rest,” replied Rei with his brow furrowed. He then turned to Makoto with a softened expression. “Will you be alright, Makoto-san?”

Makoto gave him a small nod and another smile.

“Yeah, I’ll be fine,” he said quietly, wondering just how deep the circles under his eyes were, and if a night of fitful sleep had lessened his chances of making the swim club proud. Not that anyone seemed exceptionally worried except for Rei. Haruka’s face was unreadable and Nagisa flashed Makoto a grin.

“Okay! It’s time for the tournament!” he cried with his fist in the air, determined to fire up his teammates for victory. “Let’s do our best and get ourselves a bigger budget!”

Makoto and Rei joined him in his cheers with varying degrees of enthusiasm, but Haruka continued to glare at the ground. He followed them to the bus without a word, where he chose the window seat and turned his head towards the glass to ward off conversation. Not that anyone forced him to speak. Makoto took one look at him and sat down next to him, shifting in his seat just enough to face Nagisa and Rei, whose attention he was to draw away from his friend for the entirety of their bus ride. For Haru’s sake, Makoto even braved Nagisa’s loud talk of Rin-chan with polite smiles, and listened attentively to Rei’s past tournament experiences, supplemented by Nagisa’s embarrassing anecdotes, occupying them so well that in the end, only Haruka felt that the bus ride had been far too long and horribly tedious. Not that he would have wished to join their conversation, not even if Makoto had decided to include him instead of complying with his unspoken wishes. His head was simply too full with thoughts of Rin and his impending freedom to say anything which was not to the purpose.

When they got off the bus, Haru continued to show zero interest in his surroundings or fellow athletes, leaving the vice-captain in charge of their group.

“Everyone please follow me in an orderly fashion!” said Rei to the three of them, and not quite knowing what _orderly fashion_ meant, the others ended up walking behind him in single file. Nagisa was swinging his arms back and forth in excitement, Makoto shuffled behind him in short steps not to trample on his heels, and Haruka lurched in the rear, staring a hole into Makoto’s back all the way. Rei was leading them to the front of the stadium where, parked in the shade of the entrance, a couple of girls were waiting for them with the registry list. Rei stepped in front of them, adjusting his glasses.

“Iwatobi High School, vice-captain Ryuugazaki Rei,” he announced himself. The girls glanced at each other. One of them began perusing her list.

“Um…”

Nagisa stuck his head out from behind Rei, staring at them intently until the girl in front of Rei finally found their entries. The other girl then shifted slightly to take a look at the group, finally counting four people with Haruka near-hidden in the back. As everyone had been accounted for, she held up four fingers to her friend, who ticked off their names one by one.

“Yes, go ahead,” she said, sending them to another table, where they were given a tournament program and directions to the assembly hall inside the stadium.

“Ah, that reminds me,” said Nagisa as they began walking down the first corridor. “Remember when we gave our names at the tournament in grade school and they started checking the girls’ list?”

“Don’t remind me…” said Rei with a frown. Haru said nothing.

“Mako-chan has a girly name too, so it’s too bad,” continued Nagisa in a light tone. Though Makoto didn’t protest, Rei gave Nagisa a look.

“What’s too bad? I don’t understand what you’re saying at all.”

Nagisa forgot to answer him. The moment he stepped inside the assembly hall, he was greeted by group after group of high school swimmers gathering in colorful clusters all over the designated area. Some were chatting, others were changing clothes, and one pair of high school boys were in the middle of what appeared to be a back massage.

“Aaah,” sighed Nagisa contentedly, “It’s been a while since we’ve seen something like this…”

“It does bring back memories,” conceded Rei. Nagisa glanced to Makoto, who stared rather strangely at the back massagers.

“Have you ever been to track tournaments, Mako-chan?” he asked. Makoto twitched.

“Eh? Oh, haha.. no, no I haven’t,” he replied, and though there was nothing shameful about the statement, he lowered his eyes regardless. Nagisa gave him a gentle smile.

“Then this is your first tournament, right? Don’t worry, Mako-chan, it will be great!”

“We’ll do our best at the very least to make it a good experience for you, Makoto-san,” said Rei as he finally moved forward again, coaxing the team after himself until they managed to find a good spot to unload their things and take off their shoes. They then marched on barefooted to the pool area, where everyone stared in awe at the glistening water and the rows of cheerful banners hanging from the spectator’s balcony. It was enough to make even Makoto smile, at least until he stole a glance at Haruka, finding him as steely-eyed and morose as he hadn’t seen Haru in a long, long time.

* * *

It took them a while to find Kou and Ama-chan, but eventually Makoto’s practiced eye spotted the black parasol and Kou’s red ponytail on the spectator’s balcony.

“Good morning, everyone!” Kou greeted them upon their arrival. “Have you checked the program yet?”

“Aaah, I think we left ours at the assembly hall,” replied Nagisa with a light chuckle. Kou picked up her own program, then turned it around to show the others. They now gathered around her in a half-circle except for Haruka, who sank down onto an empty seat nearby.

“Here’s the program for the first day,” she explained, pointing her finger at the timetable. “They’re starting with the hundred-meter freestyle. Haruka-senpai is in the fourth heat.”

“Wait!” cried Nagisa, his own finger jabbing the page where a couple of familiar names swam into sight. “Haru-chan and Rin-chan are in neighboring lanes!”

“Correct me if I’m wrong, Kou-san, but all heats were drawn based on qualifying times, right?” asked Rei. Kou nodded.

“That means they’re even,” said Nagisa. Behind him, Haru closed his eyes for a long moment, then arched his head forward like a ram about to charge. First heat would have been better, but even so, the race would be over fairly early, which meant he would get to watch the others swim with nothing to weigh down his mind anymore.

“The eight fastest times from each event will advance and qualify for regionals,” explained Kou. Makoto pursed his lips with a queasy expression, but Nagisa and Rei looked to him with excited smiles.

“It’ll be fine,” came Ama-chan’s voice from above their heads. “No need to get nervous. Just swim the way you usually do. The most important thing is to never give up. There’s a quote by Napoleon,” she said as she lifted her hand to complete the famous leader’s words. “ _Five minutes make the difference between victory and defeat!_ ”

“Five minutes?” repeated Nagisa.

“Amakata-sensei, that’s too long,” said Kou. Ama-chan blinked at her.

“Eh?”

“Well, you see…”

The others smothered their laughter. Five minutes indeed.

“Well, everyone,” said Rei, getting the feeling that Haruka-senpai prepared no encouraging speeches to raise their morale. “We have made it this far, so let’s do our best in our respective events, and make sure we leave without regrets!”

“Yeah!” cried Nagisa and Makoto with their fists in the air.

“If you want to do your best, come back here after the opening ceremony,” said Kou the moment she was done explaining to Ama-chan that five minutes could not compare to split second differences when it came to competitive swimming. “Come back as soon as possible! I still have information I need to share with you!”

“If you insist,” replied Rei with a push of his glasses. Kou nodded firmly, so the three of them promised to come back as fast as possible, with Haru merely shrugging his shoulders as he glared at the pool in wait.

* * *

Rei hardly knew what he expected, but during the first three heats of one hundred-meter freestyle, Kou introduced them to over a dozen different high schools in the district with nary a glance at her notes. As she spoke, her hand travelled from group to miniature group some ways below the spectators’ balcony.

“Then that’s Oga South High School, known as Oga South,” she explained as she gestured to a group down by the pool area, and one swimmer in particular as he conducted his stretches. “They have a swimmer who’s known as the Whitebait of the Sea of Japan.”

“They really have someone with that nickname?” chimed in Nagisa. Kou hummed.

“And over there is Saijouin High School,” she pointed to another group with a short swimmer doing jumps in the middle. “They have a swimmer who’s known as Jo the Flying Fish. He has an incredible vertical.”

“That seems kind of cool..” sighed Nagisa. “I want a nickname, too!”

“A nickname, you say?” replied Rei as he cupped his chin in thought. “Well, your trademark technique is stretching yourself out more than usual towards the end of a race.”

“How about Taffy Nagisa, then?” suggested Kou. Nagisa let out a whine.

“Wait, why _taffy?_ Taffy has nothing to do with swimming!”

“Then let’s leave that discussion for later, Nagisa-kun,” said Rei. Nagisa puffed his cheeks at him, to no avail. “Kou-san, I thought you only had data on Samezuka Academy. How did you collect information on other schools?”

Kou flashed him a triumphant smirk.

“Well, let’s just say I am the manager,” she said as she glanced down lovingly at the thick information booklet she had compiled in her free time, and adorned with amateur drawings of the sketchy but proportionately accurate figures of various swimmers.

“You even have notes _on their muscles_ ,” hissed Rei as he leaned over for a closer look.

“I do,” replied Kou in a distant tone, “but there’s only so much that can be expressed through notes alone…” she added with a glint in her eyes, then flopped down dramatically on the railing, her cheeks tinted a rosy pink. “Muscles are always best in the flesh! All of these muscles together in one place! _They’re fantastic! So, so wonderful!_ ”

The others decided to withhold all comments, but even if Rei could have found the words to quell Kou’s enthusiasm, he would have been interrupted by a voice coming from below.

“ _Kou-san!_ Hey, Kou-san! Over here!” cried Mikoshiba Seijuurou with a wave and a grin as other Samezuka swimmers passed him on the way towards the spectators’ benches.

“It’s Rin-chan’s captain,” said Nagisa with large eyes. He shot Kou a cheeky look as she lifted her hand to give Seijuurou the tiniest wave and an embarrassed smile, then broke into an indignant scowl the moment she noticed Nagisa staring at her.

“Stop looking at me like that!” she snapped at him, not noticing that behind her, Haruka stood up from his seat at last, peering over the railing at Nagisa’s mention of Rin. Some ways below, Seijuurou was still waving frantically as more and more Samezuka students walked past him, but no matter how many times Haru’s eyes jumped back and forth, he couldn’t see the person he was looking for.

Upstairs, nobody noticed his sudden interest in their rivals except for Makoto, who for the past few heats had been alternating between keeping an eye on his friend, and scouting the pool area for any trace of Rin.

“I don’t see Rin,” he said quietly, immediately commanding Haruka’s attention. He had been staring at the pool area tense and puzzled, and now looked to Makoto as though he were awaiting guidance. Makoto flashed him a gentle smile, then grabbed his watch to check the time. They had but a few more minutes until the fourth heat. If Rin wanted to race Haruka, he could not be far off.

“Maybe he’s already at the assembly area,” suggested Makoto, and as soon as he uttered the words, Haru leaned down to gather his goggles and swimming cap. His friend had proven to be a practical thinker. If Makoto thought Rin was at the assembly area, Haru would trust his judgment and go there.

He walked away from Makoto without a word, head arched forward and never looking back, but not even his silent leave could give Makoto pangs anymore. All that remained inside Makoto’s heart was the same sizzle of energy that chased him down the winding paths of the hill on his morning jog, and the electric blue of Haruka’s final glance at him.

The first-years were still discussing Samezuka and its captain, while Ama-chan perused the tournament program. The only person who stood watch over Haru as he headed to battle was Makoto, who arched his head forward just as Haruka had done, brow furrowed and eyes fierce.

“Haru…” he whispered, his hands clenching into helpless fists. “Win your race.”


	37. EPISODE 7: One Style Final! - Part 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Watch me, dad. I’m going to win._

Rin’s fist felt cold and lifeless against the headstone of the Matsuoka family grave, but as he stood there for a moment longer, eyes closed and hair clawed by the wind, a spark of energy stirred behind his knuckles, tingling in his palm like the crawl of a thousand ants. _Toraichi_.

Rin twitched away from the headstone, but that crackling sting remained. It pulsed across his skin as he turned around and broke into a run, down the winding path of that hill of restless souls and buried dreams. Toraichi’s red eyes hung upon his back, wide and burning like the morning sun that made Rin spill a shapeless shadow on the ground in front of him. If Toraichi was the sun, the shadow was Haru, always lingering just ahead of him or lapping at his heels, but whether Rin was forced to chase it or run from it, the shadow would remain a dark blot on his shining path until Toraichi closed his eyes for good.

As if to spur him, the sun grew more relentless by the hour, stretching his shadow into the distance, but Rin would not stop to catch his breath. To reach his train on time, he had no choice but to keep running, heaving like a hunted animal with his face drenched and the dark, heavy Samezuka tracksuit clinging to his skin. For a while, he held onto his duffel bag, but once it slipped from his wet grasp, Rin let it swing freely from his shoulder. It slammed into his back repeatedly as he dodged passersby on his way to the station, where he all but threw himself on board. He bought a ticket from the conductor, feeding it to the machine on board, and by the time he collapsed onto an empty seat near a group of chatting students, he looked and felt nothing like the calm, collected rival he wanted to be.

Oh, well. _There was a trick to that._ A girl nearby took one look at him and turned to the others with a laugh and an innocent smile. Rin closed his eyes.

_Breathe, Rin. Relax… Act like you haven’t been running like an idiot at all. Get the hair out of your eyes, that’s it.. I dare you to look at me again._

As though she had heard him, the girl glanced at him once more, only to meet Rin’s eyes. A cold, inexorable fire burned within. Her lips twitched. She quickly turned her head, looking away before Rin might have flashed her his teeth. _Good._

Rin continued to stare at her and her group of friends, and with each passing second of their mounting discomfort, he adjusted himself a little more. He raked a hand slowly across his hair to pull his bangs back in place. He straightened his back, then tugged at the collar of his jacket to loosen its wet cling to his shoulders. He flung his right foot over his knee to fix the hem of his pants. With each small act of repairing his facade, his breathing became more even and his heartbeat less erratic, until he sat there looking as though he hadn’t moved since morning. A few minutes later, a second conductor moved his way, took one look at his motionless form, then turned to the cluster of squirming high school students to ask for their tickets. Rin closed his eyes with a smirk.

He made it. Just like his favorite English phrase said… _Fake it till you make it._ Of all the foreign lingo Rin had picked up in Australia, including the swearwords taught to him by his classmates, who kept squealing in laughter as his Japanese tongue tried to wrap around them, _Fake it till you make it_ turned out to be the most helpful advice he had ever heard. Sure, it could not help with swimming. He couldn’t fake his times or the turn of his arms. No matter how much he wanted his failed turns to be worthy of the Olympic Park Aquatic Center in Sydney, wishful thinking about his technique couldn’t get him ahead. But pretending nothing could get to him regardless, that the laughter of others simply fell into a black hole surrounding Rin like a ward, because he was _too cool_ , and calm, and collected to even hear it, _that_ did wonders for him and the Molotov cocktail of anger inside him. Whenever someone outclassed him at backstroke or front crawl, Rin closed his eyes and imagined himself an impenetrable fortress, a mountain, a gate of titanium alloy, towering above the pitiful attempts of others to engage him, spite him, shame him. Years of struggling to even reach the level of his Australian peers, let alone surpass them, at least left Matsuoka Rin a powerful actor, who could detach himself from others at will if he just put his mind to it.

It even worked that night at the Iwatobi Swimming Club, for a while. He arrived on time, fell in with the shadows of the past, then followed those hapless idiots around, laughing silently at how they bumbled blindly around the halls like they didn’t even remember the way anymore. His shirt shrank onto his clammy back, his heart thumping each time Haru’s silhouette swam into his vision, but all that inner turmoil was encased in steel and ice. He hardened his features, reminded himself how much he had grown, and Nagisa’s bubbly chatter was reduced to the buzz of a fly. All Rin had to do was relax his jaw, roll his eyes, and Rei, who used to boil Rin’s blood with his stubbornness and his inexhaustible cache of knowledge, suddenly appeared to him a fussy infant instead of the tall, well-built athlete he had become. As for Haru, who trailed behind them in silence like another shadow, Rin first felt he could pierce right through him… but only for a while. He still had to practice for Haru, whose nonchalance, feigned or real, never failed to infuriate him. Rin infinitely preferred Rei for his passionate nature and his responsiveness to the slightest provocation. To get a rise out of him and then ignore him, over and over again, would have been easy and amusing to actor extraordinaire Matsuoka Rin. But Haru, _Haru_ was different. That name suited him like no other. For all the effort and enthusiasm Rin put into enticing him to swim back in grade school, Haru was harder to squeeze emotion from than blood from a stone.

Or so Rin thought, until Haru disappeared from joint practice for twenty minutes, then willingly passed up on his turn to swim over and over, just to sit next to the idiot they brought with them, a guy who couldn’t even dive or swim a decent breaststroke. Haru didn’t so much as move until Speedo Bruises stood up and walked back to the pool, but then Haru hurried after him like the guy had him on a leash. And then, _then_ Haru chose to swim next to him for the rest of joint practice, wasting his time and energy on a slow front crawl instead of taking his training seriously. _Be glad I’m up here,_ Rin thought to himself then, watching the two of them make fools of themselves in front of the Samezuka swim team. Had Rin remained by the poolside, he might have walked over and strangled both.

After joint practice, Nitori had the audacity to ask him if he knew the fourth guy’s name. _How the hell would I know_ , Rin snapped at him then, to deter him from ever asking again. Nevertheless, after their shopping trip to ZERO a few weeks later, Nitori told him he had found out the name, and might have said it, had Rin not snuffed out his words with a sharp _I don’t care_. To this day, he still didn’t know the guy’s name.

 _And then_ , after who knows how many weeks, the idiot was swimming backstroke in the ocean like it was the most natural thing in the world, right next to Haru, and Rei, and Nagisa…

Rin felt dangerously close to regretting he had not signed up for the hundred-meter backstroke. His meddlesome sister knew the swim club’s entry times by heart, and unwittingly helped Rin submit a time that matched Haru’s. All he would have had to do was ask again, do the same for Speedo Bruises, and then watch his self-confidence go down in flames at the finish. That would have been _hilarious_. It would have been compensation for… _for what?_

 ** _No._** That would have been a waste of his time and energy. It would have been a distraction from Haru, even if their hypothetical race ( _Race? Tch. Don’t make me laugh._ ) would have come some time after the hundred-meter freestyle. Most important of all, lowering his time enough to match the crawl of an amateur would have been beneath him, and Nitori would have certainly never let him hear the end of it.

Racing Haru and beating him was all that mattered right now. Rin could always just tell Nitori to watch the cuckoo’s performance, then ask for the results at lunch time. They would sit down to a well-deserved meal, Nitori would paint him a humiliating scene in vivid detail, and Rin would laugh and laugh at how Iwatobi had no more decent swimmers left, not a single one.

Toraichi was the first, and Rin was the last. Alpha and omega.

 _No wonder those guys didn’t sign up for the relay_ , he thought with a smirk. _They knew they wouldn’t stand a chance anymore._

* * *

By the time Rin reached the registration desk, his skin had dried completely, his face polished stone as the girls searched their lists for his name. He just barely resisted the impulse to say _I have a girly name, but I’m a boy!_ in an obnoxious tone, just to weird them out for hovering over the kanji of his given name for a moment too long. He then walked down the endless maze of corridors to the assembly area, where he chucked his duffel bag into the organized heap of Samezuka Academy. He stripped down to his legskin, taking off his shirt and shoes, but leaving the jacket on to hide the small jolts of his chest from Haru. He took out his swimming cap, tucked it inside his jacket’s pocket, then hung the goggles from his neck. On his way back to the corridor leading to the pool, he nudged one of the Iwatobi bags with his foot, hoping it was the cuckoo’s.

He could have easily walked down to the pool area, but on his way, he found a bench. It gave him pause… then an idea. The end of the corridor lay far away, lending itself to a long, claustrophobic walk down to where Rin was sitting. If he remained here, he could pretend he was a king seated on his throne, or the final boss on the tightly designed last floor of a video game. Haru would have no choice but to walk down all that way to meet him, right in Rin’s presence from start to finish and constantly under his watchful eye. Unnerving… _Perfect._ It would give Rin the edge he needed not to lose composure, not to show weakness in front of Haru ever again.

He settled down on the bench, throwing his back against the wall with what he thought was careless elegance. His eyelids casually lowered as his mouth petrified into a small smirk. He would wait here patiently, then give Haru a real show of his acting skills, unless that cold, uncaring punk decided to cheat him out of the opportunity.

* * *

Fortunately for Rin, Haru had no intention of avoiding him, not after waiting several weeks to finish what they had unwittingly started years ago once and for all. As per Makoto’s suggestion, he walked down the spectators’ benches, then past Mikoshiba Seijuurou, who was too busy gesturing to Kou with his pinky and thumb stretched out to imitate a phone by his ear to notice Haruka.

Haru soon entered the corridor that led to the assembly area in an endless spread of faded green. After only a few steps, his eyes fell on the straight-backed silhouette of someone in the far end, a small blob of black, red and white. Samezuka colors. _Rin_. Makoto was wrong, if only by a few feet, yet that short stretch made a tangible difference. It set Haru’s heart racing under the yellow Iwatobi shirt as he approached his rival, closing his eyes every few steps to block Rin out of sight. _Annoying_. What was he even afraid of..?

He stopped just a few feet away, his shadow a dark smear on the light green floor. At the slightest turn of his head, Rin rose from the bench, straightening to take advantage of that one inch difference in their heights. His fingers curled inward, but not quite clenching, not quite giving him away. Their eyes met. A wire of pain dragged down Haru’s spine as he straightened himself a little more.

“I’m here as promised,” he said, his voice fairly even. Rin lowered his head with a smirk.

“Of course you are,” he laughed, his voice rattling like a snake’s tail. His prey stood his gaze without blinking, cloaked in an impenetrable calm Rin wanted to tear apart scrap by scrap. “I kept my qualifying time low so I’d be in the same heat as you,” he continued with a grin, to see if a jab would leave any marks.

“There was no need for that,” replied Haruka, though his head arched forward just a little and his eyes seemed to darken. “We’d still meet in the final.”

“I can’t wait that long,” replied Rin, whose voice wavered with the impatience of a child. _Tch._ His shoulders jutted upward defensively, but his arms followed a moment later to blur the line between that moment of vulnerability and the next performance of the actor, the next bite of the snake. Now he was glad he didn’t tuck the goggles away with his swimming cap.

“Besides, there’s no guarantee..” he began to say as he pulled his goggles up to his forehead and stretched out the straps to snap them into place, “ _..that you’ll make it to the final._ ”

Haru’s eyes narrowed at once, arching his head forward a little more as Rin tore into his pride and left a gash. Haru let his glare fall behind the other on an empty spot on the wall. His eyes then grew vacant, his stance as still as a statue. It reminded Rin of Haru at school, and at the swimming club, and on the evening of their little “party” – Haru on the defensive. Rin’s lips split into another smirk at the thought, longer, wider, hungry.

“No one else matters,” he told Haruka as he moved towards him, tending just slightly to his left but looming to the right. “This is between you and me.”

Haru’s fists clenched by his sides as Rin drew closer and casually stepped beside him, never breaking his stride.

“ _I look forward to it,_ ” he said in a smooth, almost playful tone as he brushed past him, leaving Haruka behind.

Haru remained frozen to the spot, those words trickling down his ears like acid. He only moved once Rin’s presence faded, when his steps finally grew too quiet to be traced. That was when Haru twitched forward to enter the assembly area, where he too began to take off his tracksuit pants and shirt, leaving nothing but his jammers and Iwatobi jacket. He opened one of the unclaimed lockers on the side, checking himself in its small built-in mirror. His cheeks looked paler than he would have liked.

He stared his reflection in the eye with a hard squint, steeling himself. It had to be a serious race. Nothing would satisfy Rin, and besides, Makoto was right. If your rival asked you to race him, you had to give it your all. And once you had given your all, there would be nothing left but emptiness, the emptiness of freedom.

 _Today, I become free_ , he told his face in the mirror, then slammed the locker door shut before his reflection might have laughed at him.

* * *

Outside, the third heat of freestyle was steadily drawing to an end. Seijuurou had since joined his fellow swimmers on the spectators’ benches fitted with the Samezuka banner, while Ama-chan walked down from her seat to stand with her students by the railing, all their eyes set to the poolside, where the eight swimmers of the fourth heat would appear in any moment now. It took a few seconds to notice the small cluster gathering by one of the entrances, but once they formed a single file and headed towards the starting blocks led by one of the organizers, Nagisa finally spotted Haru and Rin.

“Haru-chan and Rin-chan are up!” he told the others as he leaned over the railing, pointing at the small figures further away. Haru was fourth in line with Rin close behind him, the former walking with his head lowered and the latter with his head held high.

“Who are you cheering for, _Matsuoka-san?_ ” asked Ama-chan with a playful stress of Kou’s surname.

“Both of them, _both of them!_ ” replied Kou at once with her hands clasped firmly, refusing to divide her loyalty between their own swimmer and Onii-chan. Makoto’s lips twitched, but he remained silent, his eyes fixed on Haruka and his heart in his throat. He would at last see Haru swim with Rin. Then, perhaps, he would finally understand their relationship better. For that reason only, he could hardly wait.

“Haru-chan! Fight-ooo!” cried Nagisa from the top of his lungs, but if Haru heard him, he showed no sign of being interested in anything but walking in perfect file, back straight and eyes on the back of the swimmer in front of him. With each step, the green tiles sent sparks up his naked feet, slowly building in his chest into a ball of nervous energy. His senses were growing sharp, sharper, until the other swimmer’s back became a mosaic of pores, and the once blurred murmur of the crowd broke into small, individual voices, and strings of familiar words. His heartbeat was ringing in his ears, drumming louder and louder until it connected to every other heart across the stadium. _What a strange sensation…_ he hadn’t felt so alive in ages, not since his last race with Rin at the desolate Iwatobi Swimming Club. Somehow, when Rin was there, even the water felt more alive.

* * *

They shedded their jackets near the starting blocks, pulled their goggles into place, then stepped into their places, Rin on Block 4 and Haruka on Block 5. Their timers moved to stand right behind them, stop watches in hand. Haru lowered his head to steal a look at Rin. Rin glanced to the side just enough to glare back at him. They then turned, perfectly statuesque, towards the sparkling water that extended its blue depths towards Haruka like the open gates of home.

_"Ready… Set…"_

At the signal, they curled into position, backs arched and toes clenching around the edge of the block in anticipation.

**_"Go!"_ **

The ball of energy burst inside Haruka as he launched off the block in a graceful arch, entering the water with the effortless poise of a merman. Rin leaped after him with raw force and fierce determination, the two gliding side by side with their arms extended forward, until they broke through the surface and into the most furious front crawl Makoto had ever seen.

“So fast…!” he blurted wide-eyed, his eyes still on Haruka, but next to him, Nagisa’s brow creased in alarm.

“Rin-chan’s gotten a lot faster!” he replied, his hands tightening on the railing. “He’s pulling ahead of Haru-chan!”

“Haruka-senpai’s falling behind in the first leg..?” mumbled Rei as though he had never seen or heard such a thing before. Makoto’s heart skipped a beat. Haruka’s arms were whirling like the dance of a dervis, but when Makoto forced himself to look beyond him, he saw Rin steadily gaining ground, with Haruka struggling to catch up to him.

“They’re entering the turn!” cried Rei, but it was Rin who arrived first with a lightning fast tumble, followed by a kick that propelled him forward before Haru could get in reach to make his own turn. Rin’s arm shot out of the water. They passed each other just before Haru’s tumble, his eyes growing large as he watched Rin pull past him with the malicious grin of a hungry predator. A split second later, Haru made his turn, too. Though his kick was not as powerful as Rin’s, a swell of desperation drove him forward, and he now clawed his way after his opponent with steadily increasing speed.

“Haru-chan’s catching up!” cried Nagisa. Beside him, Makoto had been gritting his teeth so hard his jaws were going numb, but he finally opened his mouth to take a large gulp of air, large enough to shout,

“ _HARUUUU!!_ ”

“HARUKA-SENPAAAIII!!” screamed Rei too, and if Haru pretended not to have heard his friends before, their cries were now roaring in his ears. He continued to chase blindly after Rin and the pulse of water in his wake, which drew Haruka forward like a magnet. By the wall awaited his freedom, the new path Rin would carve for him once Haru cleared his way to the Olympic stage.

To his right, Rin neither saw nor heard anymore. Static buzzed in his ears and his mind, his body driven by one singular urge: _to win_ , to reach the wall first, or watch himself and Toraichi die all over again. The wall was getting closer, he could feel it, he could _reach it…!_

At the last spurt, one pulled slightly ahead of the other, a hand slamming on the wall followed by another.

Rin burst through the water and gasped for air. Haru was heaving beside him.

The electronic billboard lit up at last.

_1 – Matsuoka Rin_

_2 – Nanase Haruka_

Above them, the Iwatobi Swim Club stood thunderstruck by the railing.

“Haru… lost..” breathed Makoto, dread coiling in his stomach.

“No way…” whispered Nagisa, one hand letting go of the railing in search of Rei, and finding a shaky hold on the hem of his jacket. Rei’s hand clasped around his wrist a moment later, his brow creased.

“And he didn’t advance..” said Kou in a small voice when the board lit up again to let them know that Matsuoka Rin was confirmed for the freestyle final.

“ _YEESSS!_ ” screamed Rin below as he tore off his swimming cap and goggles, bringing his fists back down in a triumphant slam. He then threw his head back, laughing with all his heart as others in neighboring lanes stared at him except for Haruka. “ _Yes!_ ”

“ _Way to go, Matsuoka!_ ” cheered the Samezuka quadrant behind their red megaphones and Samezuka banner.

“Senpai..!” cried Aiichiro in their ranks, his cheeks flushed in unbridled joy. Matsuoka-senpai won just as Aiichiro said he would. Senpai had beaten Nanase Haruka at last.

His voice was loud enough to be heard below, where Rin’s lips twitched into a faint smirk. He hoisted himself up and out of the pool a moment later, but he need not have hurried, for Haruka was still standing in the water, just as he had arrived at the finish. Everyone else had long left, but Haru couldn’t so much as move, head hanging and still struggling to catch his breath. He briefly wodnered when Rin was going to extend his hand to him, to tell him he was free to go.

“Haru!” came Rin’s voice above him, eerily loud and rough. Haruka looked up. Rin was standing over him, one hand holding his jacket and the other resting on his hip, completely out of Haruka’s reach.

“I win,” said Rin, “and this means I’ll never swim with you again.”

Haru’s eyes widened as his heart skipped a beat. Silence fell upon him in heavy waves, as if the stadium had collapsed into a vacuum where every other heart ceased to beat with his.

“ _Never again_ ,” said Rin with a content smirk.

Haru’s eyes grew large and glassy, and when Rin turned around to leave him, Haruka remained shackled to the water that now lay around him dead, _dead,_

_Dead._

 

**_TO BE CONTINUED…_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 


	38. FrFr! - Forbidden Aquarium!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A short bonus chapter in honor of Makoto's birthday, which is ironically about Haruka's birthday instead since the timeline of Season 1 does not reach far enough to cover Makoto's birthday. Makoto is more than happy to share the spotlight, though. This chapter takes place just after everyone arrives back at the port from their training camp, which ended on Haruka's birthday.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Sunday, June 30, 2013.**

When Coach Sasabe’s shrimping boat arrived safely in Iwatobi Port, the first-years hurried off to catch their trains, while Haru and Makoto walked home together at a leisurely pace. Haru helped carry some of Makoto’s camping equipment on the way back, and in return, Makoto walked him to his front door, where the harsh reality of going back to an empty house finally hit Haruka full force. Nevertheless, he managed a straight-faced _Good night_ and entered his house with a sense of calm resignation, knowing that if he could bother to charge his phone, he would find a message from his parents, wishing him _Happy Birthday_. Tired as he was, the idea alone felt more than enough, so Haru crawled directly into bed, wishing only that his first day of seventeen would pass just like any other day.

Needless to say, such simple wishes either come true or fall through in spectacular ways. Come Monday morning, on their way to school, Makoto started asking Haru questions, question Haru found rather suspect. _Are you free after practice tomorrow, Haru?_ _Could we spend the afternoon together, you and I and the twins? What’s your favorite color, Haru? Is it blue? You like dolphins, right?_ Each time Haru asked where these oddly specific questions tended, Makoto would smile and say he was just curious. _You’re a terrible liar_ , thought Haruka as he narrowed his eyes at the other, but try as he might, he could imagine nothing sinister behind Makoto’s words and hopeful smiles. The more he looked and listened, actually, the more curious he became despite himself. What would Makoto and the twins possibly want to do with him?

* * *

Come Tuesday afternoon, the two of them walked home from practice together, agreeing to meet at the single torii in half an hour – enough time for a change of clothes, or in Haruka’s case, a twenty-minute bath. Makoto and the twins thus beat him to the torii, Ran and Ren dressed in their nicest summer clothes to honor the occasion of their first outing with Haru-chan. Makoto dressed rather plainly in comparison, which was comfort to Haruka, but he still felt outclassed in his long-sleeved shirt and jeans when Ran’s pigtails had been tied with ribbons, and her bright floral dress rivaled an ornate yukata.

“Haru-chan, Haru-chan!” cried the twins with a wave of their hands. Makoto lifted his hand too, flashing Haru a cheerful smile that made him look a lot less plain.

“Are you ready, Haru?” he asked in a warm tone. Haru’s fingers tensed into fists, having wrestled with his fear of the unknown all day and unable to best it.

“Where are we going?” he asked in a low, anxious tone. Makoto chuckled.

“Ran, Ren and I want to go to the aquarium together to see their newest exhibit, and since you like water, we thought you might like to come with us,” he explained with obviously pleasure in his plan, but Haruka’s eyes slowly widened in horror. He turned his head sharply, casting his eyes on the ground.

“I can’t come,” he said quietly. Makoto blinked.

“Eh? But I thought you said you were free!”

Haru’s lips twitched into a frown.

“I’ve.. been banned from the aquarium.”

“Eeh?!” cried Makoto. “What did you do?!” Haru clenched his jaw.

“When I was seven, I climbed into one of the tanks and swam around until they came after me and pulled me out.”

Ran and Ren started giggling in disbelief, but Makoto lifted a heavy hand to his face.

“Oh for heaven’s sake..” he mumbled under his breath, but there was no turning back now. Last night, he hyped up Ran and Ren about going to the aquarium with Haru until they were fit to burst. There was no way they would give it up once their amusement over Haru wore off.

“Well, that was ten years ago, maybe they’ll lift the ban now that you’re older…” continued Makoto in a hopeful tone, and as Haru didn’t want to argue in front of the children, he had no choice but to trust his friend.

* * *

At first, everything went swimmingly. Makoto entered the ticket office with Ran and Ren on each side and Haru hiding close behind him, making good use of his bulk by leaning completely into the ticket window to ask the elderly cashier for four tickets. Nevertheless, he could not block out the guard nearby, who started eyeing Haruka with a puzzled expression. When Haru made the mistake of looking in his direction for the first time since he entered, the guard closed the entrance to the displays and hurried over to the office. He stepped inside and whispered something to the cashier. She in turn looked at Makoto with narrowed eyes behind her purple spectacles.

“Step aside, please,” she instructed him, and when Makoto reluctantly moved and exposed Haruka, the cashier simply pointed at Haru and said,

“That person has been banned from the aquarium.”

“Told you…” muttered Haru in a dull tone, but Makoto stepped back to the window at once to lean forward and put on a desperate face.

“But he was only seven when he was banned! He’s seventeen now, won’t you please reconsider?” he pleaded the old lady with his sweetest smile, to no avail.

“Unfortunately for Nanase Haruka-kun,” said the cashier in a dry tone as she reached out to the side for one moment, then turned back holding a plaque with a picture of completely soaked seven-year-old Haruka, and several small newspaper clippings pinned under his picture, “we have kept tabs on him over the years out of curiosity, and learned that he’s been banned from several places, as late as April _this year_.”

“The home improvement store,” whispered Haru behind his back. Makoto could feel his brow twitch.

“May I please see the owner of the aquarium..?” he asked in his calmest voice.

“Of course, but he’ll probably tell you the same,” replied the cashier.

* * *

The owner’s office was some ways to the left. It was a large cubicle with windows all around, which thankfully turned out to be soundproof, sparing Haruka from hearing the owner’s choice words to Makoto as the latter bowed deep and begged him with his hands clasped together. At one point, he even gestured outside to the twins, who were clinging to Haru in excitement and immediately gave the owner the biggest puppy-dog eyes Haru had ever seen. After what seemed like an eternity, the owner nodded, and Makoto’s shoulders slumped visibly in relief. The owner then moved past Makoto to exit the cubicle, walking over to Haru and the twins with Makoto trailing close behind him.

“We will temporarily suspend the ban on Nanase-kun,” he informed Haruka, which caused the twins to squeal and high-five each other with joy. “However, I must insist that you follow our safety regulations, which were implemented shortly after your ban.”

Haru quirked an eyebrow. The twins peered up in curiosity. Makoto swallowed.

Upon their return to the ticket office five minutes later, they received their tickets as well as three large clip-on tags, one light pink, and two light blue.

“These tags let the guards of the displays know that the children who wear them are in need of adult supervision,” the cashier told them in a droll tone as she handed Haruka his tag. “If the child seems to be by themselves, the guard will kindly escort them to the hallway if he cannot find their guardians at the current display.”

Makoto’s ears were burning by this time. He didn’t dare look Haru in the eye anymore, but Haru merely stared at the tag with a sour expression, and once Ren managed to attach his own tag, he quickly stole Haru’s attention by a gentle tug at his sleeve.

“Look Haru-chan, we match!” he said proudly as he pointed to his tag, and when Haru discerned that Ren was genuinely happy to have something in common with him, he felt his lips twitch into a small smile.

“We do, don’t we,” he replied in a calm tone, then fixed on his tag before turning to Makoto, who stared at him completely baffled. “Let’s go, Makoto.”

“O-Oh, right, follow me, everyone!” replied Makoto with an awkward smile.

Once Makoto assumed his place in front of his small party, they entered the aquarium at last, with Ran clinging to Makoto’s hand and Ren to Haru’s arm, both of them keeping close not to risk being sent to the hallway.

* * *

Inside the first display hall, Haru found to his surprise that the aquarium had been somewhat renovated and repopulated in his long absence. Seeing his confused expression, Makoto asked him if the aquarium looked just as he remembered it, and when Haru replied in the negative, the twins began asking him questions, until Haru found himself giving them a detailed description of the former display in surprisingly vivid detail. Ran and Ren were fascinated by his explanations. As the four of them wandered from tank to tank, they kept begging Haru for more. At one point, Makoto gently chided them for tiring Haru, but his friend continued to oblige the twins as though he simply couldn’t say no.

At the end of the tour, having heard Haru’s description of the former state of each display hall and individual tank, the twins and Makoto were forced to conclude that the aquarium they had just seen for the first time looked more splendid now and housed far more creatures of the deep than ever before.

“Did you like the new aquarium, Haru-chan?” asked Ran when they left the final tank. Haru paused, but in the end, he nodded with a small smile.

“Then we could come again for your birthday next year!” said Ren at once, only to gasp and slap his little hands over his mouth.

“Onii-chan told you it was a secret!” his sister scolded him with a cross look. Haru turned to Makoto dumbstruck.

“For my birthday..?” he echoed. Makoto let out a short, nervous laugh.

“I told them your birthday was on Sunday and you didn’t get to be with your family, so we thought we could take you somewhere nice…” he mumbled with flushed cheeks. He need not have feared Haru’s reaction so much, though, for his friend stared back at him surprised, then cast his eyes on the ground.

“I told you it was just a birthday..” he muttered under his breath. Makoto rubbed at the nape of his neck.

“Ran and Ren first said we should give you a birthday dinner, and I would have been happy to do that, but I wasn’t sure if you’d have been comfortable spending the whole evening with my family…” he admitted with red ears. “But if you liked, you could come over for dinner tonight, Haru..”

Haru flushed and turned his head.

“No, that’s fine,” came the sheepish reply. “I have mackerel at home.”

Makoto laughed despite himself.

“Our family lost to mackerel…” he said in an amused tone, and had he not been so embarrassed, Haru might have at least smiled at the joke.

* * *

In the end, Haru agreed to sharing a piece of cake with the twins at the aquarium café, and even walked them back to their house, stopping to look at the grave of the goldfish as Ran and Ren hurried inside to their parents. Makoto stepped inside himself to pick up a plastic bag while Haru wasn’t looking, managing to hide it by his side all the way up the stone stairs as he walked his friend back to his house. It was only when they reached the front door that Makoto revealed the plastic bag, from which he produced a parcel and presented it to Haruka in all its clumsily wrapped glory of too much duct tape and lopsided ribbons.

“Since I couldn’t give you a present at camp, I went out yesterday and got you this,” he said with a tender smile. “Happy birthday, Haru.”

Haruka blinked. He almost protested the gesture, but just like the twins earlier, he simply couldn’t say no to Makoto. He sighed and relieved the other of the mystery gift, then carefully coaxed the duct-taped seams apart, to find what appeared to be blue cloth folded neatly into a square.

“It’s an apron,” Makoto explained as Haru set down the wrapper by his feet to inspect the article in question, marveling silently at its deep shade of blue, sturdy grey strings, and the small dolphin on its top pocket. “When I was in your kitchen, I noticed you only had one apron, and I thought, since you cook a lot, maybe you could use a spare for when that one’s in the wash…” said Makoto in a tentative tone, as though he were walking on eggshells. Haruka pursed his lips, but since Makoto had been tactful enough not to bring up the holes and tears of that beloved old relic, Haru rewarded him with a tired smile.

“It will make a good spare,” he managed to say in a thick tone. Makoto laughed.

“I’m glad. Well.. I guess I should leave you to your mackerel.”

“Yeah,” said Haru with a flush.

When Makoto cocked his head with a grin, then turned to walk away, Haru bit his lip and stepped forward.

 _I had fun today_ , he tried to say in a voice that cracked and crumbled before it could reach Makoto’s ears, and unable to repeat himself, Haru stood frozen as Makoto passed the gate and disappeared, his hands wringing his wonderful new apron.


	39. EPISODE 8: Revenge in the Medley! - Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Standing in the lifeless hold of the water felt like an eternity inside a void, where Haru saw, heard, and felt nothing. The slight shake of his arms and chest sent light ripples across the surface, but that soft movement seemed to him no more than the sway of dry grass in the wind, the involuntary motion of something that could move of its own will no more. The water was dead, and in it, Haru felt thirteen years old again, standing frozen in the middle of the pool at the Iwatobi Swimming Club, where all eyes fixed on him in a growing murmur of shock and confusion when he came to a strangled halt before he could even make the first turn. The murk of the water had dragged him down, choking him until he planted his feet on the bottom and stopped moving completely. It was the first and last time Haru went to the Swimming Club after that ill-fated race at New Year’s, and just like that lost younger self, Haru now raised his head to the sky in search of an answer.

_What is happening to me?_

_Why am I still here..?_

“Hey!” a voice pierced through the void and startled Haruka out of his trance. His eyes narrowed in something akin to fear, but Rin was long gone. There were no hands reaching towards him. The person who spoke was his timer, his hands propped on his knees as he bent down just far enough to talk to Haruka.

“You need to get out of the pool now,” the man informed him in a calm tone. “The next heat is about to begin.”

Haru wavered. His feet felt as though his bones had sprouted from his soles and rooted him to the concrete.

“Do you need help?” asked the man. He extended his hand at last, but Haru didn’t take it. He tugged his own hands out of the water, grasped the edge of the pool, then dragged himself upward like he were struggling out of quicksand.

Far above him, Makoto’s hands wrung the railing so hard his knuckles turned white. It couldn’t have been more than a minute, Haru couldn’t have been standing under the starting block for longer, but to Makoto, it felt like forever…

He had to pry his cramped hands off the railing once he saw Haru stir and hoist himself out of the pool. The timer said something to him, after which Haru turned towards the nearest exit, but his steps seemed slow and unsure, as though he were in a stupor. Makoto had never seen Haru look like that before. _Something went wrong, very wrong…_

Hardly knowing what he was going to do, just that he had to do _something,_ Makoto finally pulled away from the railing. He turned towards the stairs, but could hardly take two steps before he felt a snag on his tracksuit jacket, caught at the last moment in Nagisa’s grasp.

“Where are you going, Mako-chan?” he asked, his tone a little strained. Makoto stared back at him bewildered.

“I’m going down to see Haru,” he replied, his brow furrowed in disbelief. Why were they worried about Makoto? Did no one else think of going after Haru? Was nobody else worried about _him..?_

“Wait, Makoto-san,” spoke Rei, standing up from his seat to give his words more authority. “I think we should let Haruka-senpai recover.”

“Recover..?” echoed Makoto.

“Haru-chan is probably going to take a shower,” said Nagisa, trying for a smile that failed to convince or calm down Makoto. “We can’t just barge in on him while he’s in the shower, right?”

“Please wait here, Makoto-san,” said Rei, gesturing to the empty seat by his side. “I’m sure that when Haruka-senpai is ready, he will come back here to join us.”

“But, you _saw_ him!” protested Makoto, one hand idly grasping for Nagisa’s in the hopes of shaking his hand off his jacket. His fingers bumped into Nagisa’s wrist and wrapped around it. Nagisa let him go at once, his fingers curling into a loose, harmless fist in wait for Makoto to release him. “Rin must have said something to him, he went over to Haru and then he left and Haru just.. stood there…”

“Makoto-san, please calm down,” said Rei, his eyes darting to Nagisa’s caught arm. Makoto’s eyes followed. A moment later, he withdrew his own hand with a guilty look on his face.

“Haruka-senpai lost his race and didn’t advance to the regional tournament,” continued Rei. “It’s only natural for him to be upset. Surely you can understand that.”

“But, _Rei—_ ”

“Mako-chan…” pleaded Nagisa, his eyes large and childlike. Makoto hesitated.

“I promise Haruka-senpai will come back to us in time for your event, so please stay with us until he returns,” said Rei in a soothing tone, wondering how Nagisa could ever think he had a calming presence, when he obviously had no effect on Makoto. He braced himself for another argument, but after a long moment, Makoto lowered his head in defeat. He then sank down onto his designated seat without another word. Rei sighed in relief as he sat down next to him.

“I’m certain Haruka-senpai will appreciate your concern for him, Makoto-san,” he said kindly, but just this once, his kindness was lost on tense, struggling Makoto. Fortunately for both, Nagisa soon spotted a group of swimmers gathering below, then forming a single file just as four other groups had done before them.

“The fifth heat is going to start any minute,” he said with his finger pointed towards the pool, and though he could not entice Makoto to lift his head, everyone else happily obliged him. Far below, the eight swimmers stepped upon their respective blocks, curled into position at the signal.

_Ready… Set. Go!_

* * *

As the fifth heat unfolded, Makoto began to admit, if only to himself, that his staying with the others might have been for the best. Nagisa and Rei probably knew Haru better, they had several years of experience on their side compared to the measly four months under Makoto’s belt, and if they assured him Haru would be back, Makoto didn’t want to doubt their words. Besides, if it really turned out that a shower was all Haru needed to regain his balance and peace of mind, wouldn’t it be shameful to not be waiting for him with open arms the moment he reappeared? Imagine if Haru arrived to the others in search of comfort and found Makoto gone, apparently on a frantic search for him because he got upset and wouldn’t listen to reason… That would only bring discomfort to everyone. It would accomplish nothing beyond needlessly upsetting others, so Makoto grasped the edges of his seat and stayed. Given enough time, he could shame himself into just about anything.

The others did their best to distract themselves by watching the race. Makoto, who could not care less, continued to stare blankly at the ground, to be roused during the last spurt by the sound of approaching footsteps. _Haru?_

He lifted his head at once, then dropped it with a disappointed frown. It wasn’t Haru, though at the very least, it was a familiar and friendly face: Sasabe Goro in turquoise shorts and a blaring red and pink flower shirt.

“Oh, there you are!” he called out to them, all smiles and a large blue megaphone dangling from his hand. “Sorry I’m late.”

“Coach Sasabe…!” spoke Rei in pleasant surprise, but Nagisa shot the newcomer a miffed look as he sprung up from his seat by Rei’s side.

“Where were you?! You are late, Goro-chan!” he scolded him, but before Sasabe could properly defend himself, Ama-chan rose from her seat as well, practically blocking out Nagisa with the aid of her black parasol.

“Thank you for your help the other day,” she chirped in a flowery voice. “I appreciate your taking time from your work to come and support us.”

“Oh, it’s no big deal,” straightened Goro with a content grin, but his pleasure soon gave way to a curious frown as he leaned closer to look the Iwatobi Swim Club advisor in the eye. She reeled. He rubbed his chin in thought. “I can’t shake the feeling that we’ve met before.”

“N-No, I don’t think so…” said Ama-chan with a troubled smile. Behind her, Nagisa slapped his hands on his hips.

“Jeez, did you come here just to hit on girls?”

“I wasn’t hitting on her!” snapped Sasabe right back.

“Haruka-senpai already swam his freestyle heat,” Rei informed him, his brow quirked in wait of an explanation as to why such an important event was not attended in time. Sasabe’s hand slipped to the nape of his neck.

“Oh, darn it, I missed the prelims..” he mumbled apologetically. “But I can still watch the finals, right?”

The others exchanged glances. Their former liveliness wilted.

“He won’t be in the final,” said Makoto on the far end, his voice low and even. Sasabe blinked.

“Huh?”

“Haruka-senpai.. he placed second, and didn’t qualify,” explained Rei, no longer looking anyone in the eye.

“He lost?!” blurted Sasabe, hardly able to believe it. The others nodded in silence. Makoto hung his head with a bitter scowl.

 _I’ll race Rin and then we’ll move on_ , Haru told him yesterday, a yesterday that seemed eons ago. _I just need to do this one last time._

 _Well, you did, Haru. And then he hurt you again…_ thought Makoto in reply, his hands unconsciously hardening into fists.

* * *

Rei and Nagisa were partly right. While they were doing their best to detain Makoto, Haru was roaming the corridors with the stumbling steps of onsetting vertigo, his hands palpating the wall for support as he leafed through the blank pages of his mind. Where did he see the sign to the showers? He hoped he would find it soon, and find no one there. He couldn’t bear the idea of being around anyone right now. If he couldn’t suffer the pity of his friends, he would not tolerate the indifference of strangers, either.

The last time he felt like this, he didn’t go home from the Iwatobi Swimming Club. He ran right past his house and up the snowy steps, to lose himself inside the Misagozaki shrine, huddled into a ball behind the building until his parents came searching for him in heavy winter jackets and flashlights in their hands. His father shook him hard for it, and his mother yelled his head off as she dragged him into the bathroom for a hot bath, before he might end up in hospital again, but Haru felt no guilt or regret. He felt like the small husk of a cicada, useless and cast off, utterly empty inside.

He found the showers just past the men’s bathroom, but when he heard voices and the spray of water inside, Haru slipped into the bathroom instead and locked himself into a stall, where he waited in silence until he could hear the shower doors open again, and the sound of footsteps ebbing away. Only then did he peek out from behind the door, eyes darting back and forth for any trace of people nearby. The corridor still span to his dizzy mind, a swirl of white and hospital green. Haru’s hands found the wall and guided him inside, his feet wobbling against the wet ceramic tiles.

He turned on one of the shower heads and stepped under it, both hands on the wall to keep himself from falling to his knees. Water spluttered down his scalp and back, pouring over him in cold spurts and constant motion. He watched it all spiral towards the drain, falling through the grate into the depths, and wished uselessly he were liquid too, so he could collapse and be swallowed by the drain. Haru wished to no avail. Under the downpour, he remained bone and flesh and aching skin, doomed to stand there confused and terribly lost, as if Rin had broken the compass of his heart.

 _I thought I didn’t care about winning_ , he searched himself in the steady sliver of water down his face, arms spread and hands bound to the wall. _Wasn’t I… Wasn’t I supposed to become free after racing him…?_

At that moment under the blocks, he felt no frustration over his loss. He was truly waiting for Rin to extend his hand in reconciliation, but instead Rin threw him away. Was _that_ freedom? The screeching emptiness that wrenched his heart open, seeping down to his stomach like a heavy trickle of tar?

Why would freedom hurt this much..?

Though suffocated in that torrent of pain, a small voice cried out that freedom wasn’t supposed to hurt. Freedom, freestyle, _free_ wasn’t supposed to scorch, freeze, and leave you paralyzed. And if it did...

_He was unfair, and it was wrong._

_Makoto._ When Haru closed his eyes, he could sometimes hear Makoto say these childish things that had no reference to the chasm gaping within Haruka, to his hunched figure in the confines of his bathtub, or the hours he spent staring at the wall in his room, unable to leave it. Yet as he stood there, eyes large, legs shaking, and his nails scraping against the tiles, Haru desperately wanted to believe him.

 _But Makoto,_ he pleaded that ghostlike copy in his head, _if that’s true, then why does the water feel dead without Rin..?_

Haru even closed his eyes for him, but Makoto’s voice had no answer.

* * *

Having left Haru in the proverbial dust, Rin headed inside the stadium with a few of his fellow competitors, basking in their awed and jealous glances behind the veil of hot steam wafting through the showers. Rin rubbed his arms and chest vigorously, then gave his tingling scalp a massage, unable to stop grinning with his teeth on full display. He could have gloated out loud to the nameless nobodies around him, how they and Rin would never meet again, but he didn’t have to. The way they talked to each other in hushed voices, Rin truly felt on top of a rostrum far above their heads, where the woes of mere mortals simply couldn’t reach… and if they were by chance discussing how he looked like an idiot with that nasty zigzag grin on his face, well, they had never known the pleasure of humiliating a proud opponent. _Oh, the look on Haru’s face!_

Rin wanted to laugh at the top of his lungs. When the truth dawned on Haru, that first place read _Matsuoka Rin_ , not _Nanase Haruka_ , he looked so shocked Rin thought he might lay an egg. Served Haru right, thinking he was the best just because he was so naturally gifted. He always thought he was too good for Rin, who had done so much for him, yet never received a thank you. Well, he showed Haru, Rin sure showed him… _a sight he’d never seen before..!_

Rin threw his head back and burst into laughter, his voice bouncing off the walls like a handful of jagged rocks.

* * *

Outside, he sank down on a bench in nothing but his legskin and a towel over his head, still laughing, now silently, at his own brilliant joke. He felt he could have sat there for ages, just him and his radiant aura of glory, perfectly, wonderfully content to be alone.

A moment later, a voice came blaring down the hallway. Nitori.

“ _Matsuoka-senpai!_ ” cried Aiichiro as he came running towards Rin, still fully clad in his Samezuka tracksuit and sneakers. He had rushed all the way from the Samezuka benches to the showers in search of Rin, to be the first to see Senpai smile after his victory.

“You did it! You qualified for the final and you beat Nanase-san!” he blurted in one breath, his round face so becomingly cheerful Rin could feel his smirk grow a little wider. It wasn’t Sugimoto-sensei shaking his hand in front of the entire swim team (not that he cared for anyone’s approval), but for now, Nitori’s reverent looks and praise would do just fine.

“Yeah, well. You go kick some butt, too,” he told Nitori in a friendly tone.

Aiichiro broke into a grin again.

“Yes!”

“I’ll come and watch you,” promised Rin, feeling magnanimous on such a beautiful day. Nitori flushed and bowed his head.

“Thank you, Senpai..! Are you coming back to the others now? I’m sure everyone wants to congratulate you!”

Rin gave a _hmph_ and closed his eyes, but his face remained smooth and blissful.

“Maybe later. I’m going to rest for a while.”

“Of course! Please rest as much as you want! Oh, will you come have lunch with everyone? Captain Mikoshiba said all our expenses would be covered if we ate together and brought back a receipt.”

“Sure,” replied Rin, looking forward to some solid food after having had nothing in the morning except an energy drink from the vending machine.

“Then I shall see you soon!” said Aiichiro, turning to leave so his senpai could recharge in peace.

That was when Rin remembered.

“Wait..”

Nitori spun around at once.

“What is it, Senpai?”

“Can you do me a favor?” asked Rin, flashing Nitori what he fancied was a suave smile. The other nodded, eyes large and mouth hanging slightly ajar.

“Of course! What is it?”

“You know the fourth member of the Iwatobi Swim Club, right?”

“Yes! His name is Ta—”

“ _Uh-uh-uh_ , don’t spoil it now,” said Rin with a light laugh and a wag of his finger. Nitori bit his lips shut as though he were trying to catch and swallow the rogue syllable that escaped him unwanted. “Look up when his heat is, and tell me all about it when I come to lunch.”

“You want to know his time?” asked Nitori, his brows arched high.

“Just tell me how his race went,” replied Rin.

“Alright, I’ll watch him! I’ll watch him like a Samezuka hawk!” said Aiichiro with a hasty salute. Rin laughed again, and each little sound sent something aflutter in Aiichiro’s chest, hardly daring to believe Matsuoka-senpai was laughing for the first time in months.

“Well, off you go,” said Rin, reaching up to rub his hair dry. Nitori hummed as he cocked his head in reply, then ran off at high speed to get his program so he could look up ‘Tachibana Makoto.’

* * *

Outside, the final heat of freestyle was about to begin, so a new gathering of swimmers appeared by the entrance, forming a neat line on their way towards the starting blocks. One of them was wearing a speedo, a rare sight in freestyle where the majority of swimmers preferred the more modest coverage of jammers, but if that weren’t enough to distinguish him among his competitors, his impressive height and flaming red hair would have certainly done the trick. He walked over to his designated block, waved with a roar in the direction of the Samezuka students, then seemed to turn and wave at the Iwatobi Swim Club as well.

“Isn’t that..” mumbled Rei in a low tone, something fluttering in the corner of his eye. He turned his head just in time to catch Kou wiggling her fingers at the captain, her cheeks lightly flushed.

“Samezuka’s captain,” replied Nagisa with a grin, waggling his brow at Kou, who clapped her hands modestly for Seijuurou, then flung them to her right to give Nagisa a well-deserved shove without even looking.

“Kou-chan so mean..!” laughed Nagisa beside him, to be shoved again a little more kindly, but two seats further, Makoto couldn’t so much as crack a smile for Kou. He had been eyeing the stairs and entrances, and checking his watch every minute now, but longing and looks alone couldn’t bring him Haruka. It felt as if Haru was staying away on purpose…

Makoto closed his eyes, taking a deep breath as he descended into the vast gallery of his mind, where everything he knew about Haru came from careful observation, one of the few ways Makoto could trust himself to understand the character and actions of others. There he asked himself, _what did Haru always do when something was bothering him?_ then imagined him looking cross. The moment he could picture him frown, memories would follow of that little childish turn of his head. At the slightest provocation, Haru would invariably glare and turn his head… but only if he could not leave immediately. At school, he hardly had a choice but to stay at his desk, turning his head as archly and tellingly as possible, but once he was free to go, Haru would quickly disappear, even when he had school obligations to fulfill, and nowhere to go but back to his empty house…

Perhaps it was the only thing he knew, growing up. Haru certainly gave the impression of a solitary person, but Makoto couldn’t be _entirely_ sure, not when he had only known Haru for a little over three months. Makoto often felt as though nothing was quite certain unless it had been repeated consistently, over and over again, for much longer periods than a scant one hundred days. And even if he had seen Haru turn his head enough times to know his little frowns and annoyed glares by heart, he had never seen him so upset before. There was something uncharacteristically wrong, _unnatural_ about the way Haru stood there in the water long after the others had left it, and about his uneven steps as he headed to the exit. His friend looked hurt and wounded, and in Makoto’s experience, pain and suffering had to be tended to as soon as they were noticed. A limping puppy on the side of the road had to be scooped up and taken to the vet. A crying sibling had to be embraced, kissed calm, and asked what was wrong. And Haru…

His mind drew a blank. The impulse was to rush to his friend, but experience told him Haru might prefer not to see or talk to anyone right now. Which was right, and which was best? Makoto lay torn between the two.

Not for very long, though. If Makoto had to choose, he wanted to see Haru, and ask him what he needed. The only way to know for sure was to ask and listen, then respect Haru’s wishes, whether he told Makoto to help him or leave him be. He would respect his friend’s wishes. But first, he had to know for sure.

* * *

As Makoto wrestled with his feelings, the others watched the final heat of freestyle with their jaws hanging in astonishment. Mikoshiba was pulling ahead, leaving an obscenely large gap between himself and his fastest opponent. Samezuka Academy was going absolutely wild behind their banner, red megaphones waving in harmony as they shouted _Last spurt, last spurt, last spurt!_ in perfect rhythm. In a few more seconds, Seijuurou’s hand slammed on the wall, and Samezuka howled in joy before the board could even list his time.

 _“Mikoshiba-kun in lane four has just set a new tournament record,”_ announced someone over the speakers of the stadium.

“Now _that’s_ impressive,” mumbled Sasabe, the entire swim club transfixed on the small figure of Mikoshiba Seijuurou in the water.

 _“Way to go, Mikoshiba!”_ cried the Samezuka swim team from afar. The captain replied by waving his cap and goggles at them before triumphantly punching at the water.

“Wow..” sighed Nagisa in genuine awe. “I thought he was just an enthusiastic person, but he’s actually a really good swimmer. Huh, Kou-chan?”

He expected Kou to either shove him again or show some pride in the handsome captain, but Kou merely nodded with a hum, then lowered her head with a subdued frown. Another heat of freestyle was over, and with each finish, Kou’s memories turned like a jammed reel, back to Onii-chan and Haruka-senpai on constant, painful repeat.

Nagisa creased his brow and looked to Rei, who stared back just as lost and uncomfortable as the other felt. Next to Rei, Makoto checked his watch again. His heat was coming up in twenty minutes, but neither fear nor excitement held a place in his thoughts. Or rather, his fear had nothing to do with the water for once.

He checked his watch again, twice within ten seconds. Nagisa leaned out from his seat to look at him.

“What’s wrong, Mako-chan?” he asked carefully. Makoto lowered his wrist.

“Haru isn’t back yet,” he replied, his tone on edge. Rei glanced down to check his own watch. It was 10:52 am.

“Well.. I suppose I expected him to be back sooner,” he said apologetically. “After all, the backstroke events are to start in ten minutes.”

“Haru-chan loves water. Maybe he’s taking the world’s longest, nicest shower,” suggested Nagisa, but his nervous laughter dragged the message down with it.

“Even for Haru, that shower would be far too long,” replied Makoto without even looking at them. If Rei and Nagisa had told him, even as late as 10:52 am, that their experience was to leave Haruka alone, Makoto might have taken their word for it, but both seemed as confused as he felt, and too afraid to take the initiative.

Well, Makoto would be afraid no longer. He clenched his jaw.

“I’m going to check on him,” he told the others as he pushed himself off his seat to head towards the stairs.

“Huh? Mako-chan!” Nagisa cried after him. Even Kou and Ama-chan turned their heads.

“Wait, Makoto-san!” joined in Rei, but when Makoto started climbing the stairs two steps at a time instead of slowing down, Rei finally abandoned his seat to chase after him. “ _As vice-captain I must insist you come back here at once!_ ”

“W-Wait up, Rei-chan, Mako-chan!” whined Nagisa behind Rei, the two of them soon disappearing down the corridor.

The moment they were gone, Kou turned back towards the pool with a sigh. Amakata-sensei stared at her, then released her parasol with one hand to place it gently on Kou’s back. The poor girl had been very taciturn since her brother’s race, and Ama-chan was ready to attribute it to the tender feelings of a younger sister.

“Don’t dwell on it,” she said softly. “That’s just how sports are.”

“That’s not it,” replied Kou.

“Eh?”

Kou sighed again.

“I wanted to watch Onii-chan and Haruka-senpai swim together again, but this wasn’t how I expected it would be,” she said as she watched other high school swimmers leave the pool in happy clusters, chatting and laughing the way Rin hadn’t since he was young, and Haruka hadn’t in all his life.


	40. EPISODE 8: Revenge in the Medley! - Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Upon reaching the corridor, Makoto’s frantic dash slowed considerably in disorientation. The first time he had ventured down these halls, his eyes were constantly on Haru, searching his friend’s features for any hint of feeling while he let himself be guided by Rei and Nagisa. Now that there was no one to follow, Makoto found he had no idea where _anything_ was in the building, except for the assembly area further down the hall. Were there showers along the way? Would he have to take the next turn, perhaps? The monotony of pale green tiles offered him no clues, so Makoto abandoned his power sprint for a light, even jog that allowed him to scan every door and sign on the way. Nevertheless, a pace that suited one purpose proved unfavorable for another. Makoto couldn’t even try the first turn before Rei managed to reach him, shooting out a hand to grab his wrist.

“Makoto-san, _stop..!_ ” heaved Rei, his breath short and puffy between words. “You can’t just.. run off.. on your own like this..!”

Makoto clenched his jaw, his face darkening at the thought of being treated like an unreasonable child. He closed his eyes, inhaling deeply through his nose.

“Please let go of me,” he then said in a low, even tone, but instead of releasing him, Rei’s hand hardened on his wrist as a definite no.

“Calm down, Mako-chan,” said Nagisa once he caught up to them, his cheeks flushed from running. “You need to come back.”

“But, _why?_ ” asked Makoto bewildered as he turned back to them, his arm twisting in Rei’s grip. “Why are you trying to stop me? Aren’t you worried about Haru?”

His words reverberated clear across the hall, but their echo shuddered with the footsteps of someone coming towards them. Makoto twitched. He turned around at once with Rei and Nagisa, their eyes narrowing under the bland neon light as they stared at the approaching figure. Makoto cursed his luck. Instead of Haru, they just had to run into Matsuoka Rin, who had enough of lounging on the bench and decided to stretch his legs, just long enough to miss the backstroke event so Nitori could tell him all about it at lunch. Rin could hardly wait. Somewhere between telling his roommate to leave and his nap on the bench, his euphoria began to evaporate like morning dew.

“Rin-chan!” cried out Nagisa in surprise. Rin finally looked up, one eyebrow jumping sharply at the name. To think he had unintentionally bumped into them. _Tch._

“You guys again,” he said in a low sneer as he looked from one face to the others with a dull glare. Up close, Speedo Bruises looked larger than he expected. The way his eyes settled on Rin sent a trail of pin pricks down his spine.

“Oh, right, you’re all swimming in the tournament. Even _you_ ,” added Rin, jabbing his words at the newcomer, who instinctively straightened himself a little more, then tilted his head not down but upward, forcing Rin to raise his own head if he wanted to keep looking him in the eye. Rin furrowed his brow. If he had to choose, he much preferred slightly shorter Haruka.

“Hey, Rin-chan,” said Nagisa in a small, hesitant tone, doing his best to ignore their silent stand-off. “Have you seen Haru-chan?”

Makoto flinched. Rin broke eye contact to cock his head and quirk his brow at Nagisa.

“Haru?”

“He hasn’t come back yet,” replied Nagisa, his eyes brimming with worry. Rin stared back at him, then smothered a laugh.

“Hmph. Was losing to me really that big of a shock?” he said, eyes closed as he flashed them a smug smirk. “He’s the one who always said he didn’t care about winning or improving his time.”

His words gave Makoto pause. Even if Rin wasn’t trustworthy, that did sound an awful lot like Haru…

“That can only mean one thing, then,” he said, keeping his tone as casual as he could bear to. “Haru isn’t upset about losing. This is about something else.”

Rei and Nagisa looked at each other, then to Makoto for clarification, but Rin’s eyes shot open as though he had been struck in the face.

“ _What?_ What could be more important in swimming than winning?!” he snarled at the culprit, freezing as the other’s eyes widened and fell just below his, mouth agape in disbelief at Rin’s uneven teeth.

Blood rumbled in Rin’s ears. Nobody looked at him like that.

“Didn’t you hear me?!” he snapped. Makoto’s eyes twitched upward to meet his, his head reeling backwards in alarm. “First place is all that matters! Or did you say that because you don’t stand a chance of winning with your form?”

Rin hoped his jab would plunge deep and snag in the guy like a hook, but before Makoto could even consider a reply, Rei finally released his wrist, then moved to stand in front of him. He gave his glasses a stern push, locking Rin into a defiant glare, not as a friend for once, but as the vice-captain of the Iwatobi Swim Club, who had obligations towards his teammates that could not be ignored. Behind him, Makoto looked comically shocked, and Nagisa, completely mesmerized.

“That was uncalled for, Rin-senpai,” said Rei in a flat tone as he folded his arms over his chest, face hard and brow furrowed in obvious displeasure. “And besides, was it not you who said that you would show us there was more to swimming than theory, form, or even winning?” he continued, while Rin paled by degrees at every word, his lips parting soundlessly to say _No, stop, shut up, I don’t **care…**_ “Was it not _you_ , Rin-senpai, who had a vision he wanted to share, because you believed there was something about the spiritual union of four teammates—”

“ _SHUT UP, REI!_ ” screamed Rin at last, his hand slashing across the air to cleave Rei’s lecture in half. “What do I care about this tripe?! _I beat Haru!_ That’s all that matters.”

Rin then marched onward and brushed past them towards the exit, ignoring how Nagisa reached out a timid hand after him, then withdrew it with a pained look on his face. Beside him, Rei’s features stiffened in disapproval at being snubbed so openly, but just this once, even he resisted the urge to chase down Rin-senpai, to argue with him till they shouted themselves hoarse. In the captain’s absence, the heavy lot of maintaining order fell upon the vice-captain, and where Rei had failed with words before, he now hoped to succeed by example.

And perhaps he would have, had it not been for the fact that Rin said the magic word, unwittingly pushing a button none of them knew existed. At the mention of Haru’s name, Haru’s name spoken in such a way as to be inexcusable, something Rin’s insults couldn’t even touch splintered and snapped inside Makoto. Cold anger stirred at the bottom of his heart, slow to rise but soon coursing in his veins, until his body twisted towards Rin of its own accord, fists tight and head arched forward.

It was the impulse of the moment, two parts familiar and one part strange and new. Frustration, he had known well enough as the twinge in his chest that spurred him to chase after a petulant child, to sit them down and lecture them before setting things right, even if the ‘child’ was tall, muscular, and had pointed teeth that made Makoto nervous. And then there was, he thought, a sense of protectiveness, the instinct to defend what was more precious to him than his own peace or safety. But the rest was a haze, a vast fog, where Makoto treaded with the trembling steps of a newborn fawn, unsure where his momentum might carry him. Makoto had often shrunk from confrontations, felt his tongue twist into knots whenever others challenged him in loud and threatening voices, yet here he was, stepping forward to go after Rin in pursuit of a singular object, an apology to Haru. Even if Haru wasn’t there to hear it. Even if Makoto never so much as raised his hand in his life, but felt that if he could reach Rin, he might just grab his arm and make him listen, _really_ listen instead of pushing everyone away, including his friends and his sister…

The next moment, Makoto jolted backwards as Rei and Nagisa seized his arms to detain him, his face paling when he realized how rigid his joints felt, how menacing he might have looked at that moment to his smaller, younger peers. Searing shame shot through his shoulders down to the tips of his fingers. His arms relaxed, but his posture remained the same, tense and bound in Rin’s direction.

“Don’t go, Mako-chan,” said Nagisa in a tone verging on panic, his small hands wringing the sleeve of Makoto’s jacket. Makoto turned his head instinctively, then seemed to deflate at the look in Nagisa’s eyes. Rei narrowed his and gave Makoto’s other arm a squeeze to get his attention.

“Forget about him, Makoto-san,” he said in a firm tone that only trembled around the edges. “It would be a waste of your time to go after Rin-senpai. What’s important right now is that your first event is coming up in twenty minutes.”

Rei meant his words as no more than a reminder, but Makoto’s jaw fell in terror, all blood drained from his cheeks as he stared back at Rei like he had seen a ghost. For better or worse, his thoughts had been consumed by Haru since the end of the fourth heat, to the point where he had quite forgotten about backstroke, about the water, and even the black and green legskin he was wearing under his tracksuit that very second. The weight of his obligations now came crashing down on him as inexorably as the ocean, until the floor around him shattered into nothing, leaving him stranded on a starting block a million miles away from everyone, including Haru…

 _Haru…_ How could he possibly face the water without Haru..?

“You need to change and get ready, Mako-chan,” came the words that dragged Makoto back from the void, to stare down in horror at Nagisa and Rei as their arms coiled around him like chains. Makoto’s eyes widened.

“ _No,_ ” he said instinctively, his voice as small as a child’s. “I can’t.”

The others stared at him confused.

“Eh..?”

“What do you mean you can’t, Makoto-san?” asked Rei. Makoto clenched his jaw, his stomach churning like it was being shredded. The others fixed their eyes on him in wait. Makoto lowered his head, a lump burning in his throat.

“I don’t want to…” the words tumbled out in a low, pathetic tone that felt ridiculously mismatched with the body that produced it. Rei and Nagisa exchanged worried glances.

“What’s wrong, Mako-chan?” asked Nagisa, his hands loosening on Makoto’s sleeve.

“Is it your aquaphobia?” asked Rei as his brow creased in concern, even understanding. Makoto stared at him. It would have been so easy, _so, so easy_ to just say yes. It wouldn’t even have been a lie. The fear that kept clawing at his stomach was terribly real, and if Makoto could just bring himself to say yes, he would let everyone down in the most natural and expected way possible…

“ _No.._ ” he mumbled, his eyes on the ground. Rei now looked at him completely lost, but when Makoto tensed and turned his head slightly, Nagisa’s eyes lit up in realization.

“It’ll be alright, Mako-chan,” he said soothingly as he slipped one hand to the other’s back, giving him a light rub. “Everybody will be cheering for you, and I’m sure Haru-chan will come back in time to watch you swim!”

Makoto flinched at Haru’s name. His eyes grew large, but a moment later, he lowered his head again with a small, crumbling smile.

“I don’t think he will,” he said quietly, and his smile faded away.

“Makoto-san..” whispered Rei. He hung his head almost guiltily, but Nagisa pursed his lips and balled his hands into angry fists.

“ _Of course he will!_ ” he cried so fiercely he startled the others. “Haru-chan will definitely come and watch you ‘cause I’m gonna go find him _right now!_ ”

And with that, Nagisa whirled around and starting running down the hall in the direction Rin had come from, his jacket flapping wildly behind him.

“Wait, Nagisa-kun—” cried Rei after him, but he could hardly take a few steps in pursuit when Nagisa spun around and shouted,

“You take care of Mako-chan!”

He then disappeared down the first turn of the sickly green maze beyond, leaving his friends to stare after him dumbstruck.

When Rei could finally will himself into addressing Makoto, he dreaded, rather than relished his responsibility. Why did Nagisa-kun always act like Rei was good at providing for the emotional needs of others, when he could hardly even make sense of Makoto? Rei wanted to protest, surely Kou-san or Amakata-sensei would be a better choice… but then he saw the way Makoto’s shoulders slumped, and Rei’s features softened in defeat. He fixed his glasses, then cleared his throat. Makoto tensed.

“Well, Makoto-san?” said Rei in his warmest tone. “What do you say? Are you ready to show the world your beautiful backstroke?”

Makoto wanted to shake his head, but remorse filled his throat to the brim. He nodded with a half-hearted look. Rei gave him a tentative smile.

“Come, Makoto-san,” he said as he gingerly placed a hand to Makoto’s back, applying gentle force to coax Makoto along in the direction of the assembly area. “You will have to get changed first – are you wearing your legskin?”

“Yeah..” sighed Makoto, trying to ignore the damp cling of the fabric to his sweaty skin.

“ _Excellent!_ ” replied Rei, pouring enthusiasm into every syllable. “Once you have changed, we shall do some warm-up stretches to prepare your muscles for swimming. Just leave everything to me, and I will have you ready for your event in no time!”

Makoto hummed in agreement. After all, what choice did he have..?

* * *

At the assembly area, Rei noted with an indignant huff that somebody had either tampered with Nagisa’s duffel bag, or bumped into it and then failed to put it back in its proper place. He zipped it open and perused its contents just to be safe, while Makoto took off his clothes and folded them, hanging the goggles from his neck, then tucking his swimming cap into the hem of his legskin. A few seconds later, Rei deemed the contents of Nagisa’s duffel bag fully accounted for, so he placed the bag neatly beside the others again. He then turned to Makoto and looked him over, one hand cupping his chin as the other settled on his hip. Makoto colored at the attention.

“I see that you are ready,” said Rei, clapping his hands together. “Then it’s time for your warm-up stretches, Makoto-san!”

“Alright,” replied Makoto.

For the next five minutes, Rei diligently guided him through their usual warm-up routine, doing the exercises along with him, and holding each pose for exactly twenty seconds. Finally, to make sure he had done everything to ensure Makoto’s safety, Rei asked him to turn around, then carefully prodded his back, shoulders, and legs for tension, bumps, or knots. To his surprise and relief, he found none. Physically, Makoto was perfectly ready.

“How do you feel, Makoto-san?” asked Rei in a hopeful tone. Makoto took a deep breath, then let it out in a sigh.

“I’m nervous,” he said at last to be truthful. “I know I won’t place, there are swimmers here who are much better than me, but I’m worried about failing my dive or messing up my stroke, or breaking down.. and disappointing everyone.”

Rei creased his brow. Makoto sounded oddly familiar…

“It is very natural to be nervous, Makoto-san,” he said with a hapless smile. “I’m sure it’s only because it’s your first swimming tournament and a great number of people from over twenty different institutions will be watching your performance, and of course you are relatively new, so it’s easier to feel intimidated by the way—”

“Can you please stop telling me all that!!” interrupted Makoto, clawing at his face that was turning a sickly shade of green, not unlike the corridors they had been navigating all day. “I’m scared enough as it is!”

“C-Calm down, Makoto-san!” cried Rei in a panicked tone. How Nagisa-kun got the idea that he was an island of comfort, Rei would never know. It always seemed the other way around, it was always Nagisa-kun who calmed _him_ down…

At that thought, the proverbial light bulb blinked, stuttered, then lit up in his head.

“Makoto-san,” he said in a determined tone that immediately commanded Makoto’s attention, more from a sense of dread than deference or politeness. Rei adjusted his glasses, then took a step backwards, motioning to the floor in front of him. “Please kneel down for a moment.”

“Eeeh?!” cried Makoto. Rei lifted his hands defensively.

“Please don’t be frightened! This is a very old relaxation technique that’s guaranteed to calm you down!”

“I uh… If you say so..” mumbled Makoto.

With no small amount of hesitation, he lowered himself to the floor, squirming as he pulled his knees and ankles together, his head turned slightly in growing discomfort. He closed his eyes and wiggled his shoulders loose, expecting something like a mood-altering yoga pose or a strategic head massage, which would not have been unwelcome, as long as it was short.

Instead he felt Rei’s cold fingers against his cheek, and the next moment, his other cheek came into unexpected contact with Rei’s stomach. Makoto squeaked. Rei’s other hand landed on top of his head.

“R-Rei..?!” stammered Makoto, his ears growing hot.

“Please close your eyes and listen to the sounds of my abdomen, Makoto-san,” came the instruction from above as Rei stroked the top of Makoto’s head in light, measured brushes of his palm. “This may be an unusual technique, but trust me when I say it has managed to calm me down every single time!”

“Rei, this is _embarrassing..!_ ” whined Makoto, his hands grasping aimlessly at the air, for fear that putting up a struggle might make his situation worse. “Where did you even learn this technique?!”

“From Nagisa-kun,” came the perfectly natural reply. “Why do you ask?”

Makoto opened his mouth, then closed it, then opened it again, to find he had lost the will and ability to speak. Rei’s hand continued to pat the top of his head with calculated strokes.

“You may imagine someone else in my place if it helped you relax more, Makoto-san,” said Rei after a moment of consideration. “Think of me as.. as your vessel of comfort!”

Makoto swallowed and closed his eyes at last, but within five seconds, his cheeks bloomed a hot shade of crimson in the stark silence of Rei’s stomach.

“Are you feeling any calmer?” asked Rei in a gentle voice. Makoto suppressed the urge to scream.

“Y-Yes. Please, Rei.. I think I have to go to the pool…”

The stroking stopped while Rei checked his watch.

“Ah, you are right, we don’t have much time left. I’m afraid this was all I could do for you, Makoto-san,” he said as he released Makoto, then extended a hand for him to take. Makoto grabbed it and rose from the floor, his knees wobbling slightly from having pressed against the tiles for so long.

“I admit I felt a little flustered when it was my first time,” mumbled Rei with a nervous laugh. Makoto gave him a look halfway between annoyance and concern. “But I do assure you this technique really works, especially if there is noise coming from the abdomen. In fact, the louder the noise, the more effective it seems to be…!”

“Uh huh,” said Makoto as he tilted his head back and took deep breaths, but only did so in the hope of restoring his normal complexion, for any nervous jitters he felt before had been knocked completely out of his head by embarrassment.

“Well, I… I suppose I do feel better,” he managed to say, more to convince himself than to please Rei, but when the vice-captain flashed him a delighted smile, Makoto couldn’t help but laugh. He scratched the back of his neck. “Thank you.. Rei.”

“Don’t mention it, Makoto-san,” said Rei in genuine relief, his heart still fluttering like an errant butterfly over his first genuine success. “Come! I will escort you to the nearest exit.”

“Okay.”

With Rei in the lead, the two of them walked down another corridor towards the pool, stopping by the door when they realized that only four swimmers had gathered so far. Rei turned to Makoto again, placing his hands on the other’s arms in temporary farewell.

“You have come very far, Makoto-san,” he said with obvious pride and a wobbling squint of his eyes. Makoto’s gleamed in surprise. “Please go out there and do your best, and remember that no matter how your race ends, we will all be very proud of you. And also…”

Rei took a deep breath. Makoto’s mouth ran dry.

“I also want to thank you, Makoto-san.”

Makoto blinked in shock, having half expected warnings or tips for swimming than expressions of gratitude, especially when he had been nothing but trouble all day.

“ _Thank_ me..?”

“Yes,” replied Rei, who had been searching his mind for a while for true words of empowerment, and finally found what he was looking for. “If you hadn’t joined our swim club to ensure its survival and then helped us hold the training camp, we would not be here today. Everything we may achieve on this day will have been made possible by you, our new fourth member. Thank you for allowing us to compete again, Makoto-san.”

“Rei…” breathed Makoto, his eyes dangerously wet. Rei patted his arms.

“Good luck,” he said, then released Makoto. “I shall return to the others so we can cheer for you until Nagisa-kun finds Haruka-senpai!” he added as he turned to hurry down the hall, leaving Makoto to the heavy beat of his heart.

* * *

Makoto soon stepped outside to join his fellow swimmers, saying a muted _Hello_ before lifting his head towards the spectators’ benches in search of the Iwatobi Swim Club. The backstroke swimmers’ gathering point lay further away from the starting blocks, but after a few seconds of looking around, Makoto managed to catch a familiar cluster by the railing. His eyes fell on a small flash of yellow and blue, a blob of red, and a black clump above them – Kou’s tracksuit, Sasabe’s gaudy flower shirt, and Ama-chan’s parasol. He was vaguely aware that the other swimmers were talking, but their words blurred into background static, at least until someone nudged Makoto in the arm. He yelped and turned around, to be met by a pair of drooping green eyes remarkably similar to his, had it not been for their yellow tint that reminded Makoto of cats.

“Name and school?” asked the young man opposite him in a voice remarkably pleasant. The nametag on his white shirt placed him as an assistant to the organizers, and read _Serizawa Nao_.

“Um, Tachibana Makoto, Iwatobi High School,” replied Makoto with a slight bow of his head, his gaze drifting back to the benches right after. Serizawa hummed, ticking the name off his list.

“When I was younger, I attended Iwatobi Junior High,” he said with a smile verging on nostalgia. “I used to be a member of the swim club there. I would have enrolled in Iwatobi High afterwards, but from what I understood, they had no pool or swim club at the time.”

“The school has an outdoor pool, but was in disrepair until earlier this year,” explained Makoto, his heart brimming with pride that he knew all the details despite having been only indirectly involved. “The newly founded swim club restored it to be able to swim, and I joined them shortly afterwards.”

“I’m glad to hear the school finally has a swim club,” replied Serizawa. “Do your best, Tachibana Makoto.”

“Thank you,” mumbled Makoto, his gaze flitting away as soon as Serizawa turned away to greet another newcomer. Makoto’s eyes widened. Up at the spectators’ balcony, a blob of yellow appeared by the entrance and soon joined the others. Judging by his dynamic movement down the stairs, and his size compared to Kou, Makoto concluded it had to be Rei. He hung his head. Nagisa and Haru were still nowhere to be seen.

Makoto continued to scout the benches even as he and his competition were joined by the last two swimmers, then asked by Serizawa to form a single file on their way to the starting blocks. Makoto was forced to comply, but once he joined the line and found his pace, his head turned to the Iwatobi Swim Club again with an anxious look.

* * *

“Where’s Haruka and Nagisa?” asked Coach Sasabe once Rei stopped heaving and sank into the seat by Kou’s side. He took off his glasses to wipe his eyes.

“I’m afraid we haven’t found Haruka-senpai yet. Nagisa-kun is looking for him,” he replied as he pushed his glasses back in place. Sasabe shook his head with a huff.

“Man, what do those guys think they’re doing? Makoto’s race is about to start,” he grumbled, gesturing towards the pool, where Makoto was drawing closer and closer to his designated block, his goggles and swimming cap already in place. While everyone else was looking forward, making a good display of their impressive heights and bodies, Makoto shuffled along with his shoulders hunched, facing to the side as though his eyes had been glued to the railing. Kou gave him a wave, but Makoto just barely lifted his hand to wave back. A few moments later, he was standing by block six, where he crouched down to slip into the water while everyone else merely stepped down from the edge. He then waded around to the block and grabbed the handle bar, hoisting himself upward at the signal.

He was now crouching on the wall above the water, body twisted into form. It was time to close his eyes and block out everything, lest he panic and ruin his entry. It would have been the smart thing to do, Makoto _knew_ that, but instead his head tilted upward one last time, his eyes searching the benches.

 _Still no Haru._ After all Makoto said to him on the shore of Sukishima, even going so far as to tell him it was meaningless without him, Haru didn’t come back for him.

 _Did you really expect him to care?_ sneered the voice in the back of his head. Makoto’s eyes drifted to the sky.

“ ** _GO!_** ”

Makoto’s head twitched forward as he threw himself backwards a second later than the others, bursting through the surface and sinking to the bottom like an anchor. His body began undulating in a furious dolphin kick, but his rise seemed excruciatingly slow when everyone else was on the verge of reemerging from the water.

“What happened?!” cried Kou in alarm.

“He missed the signal!” replied Rei, his own hands wringing the railing in agony.

“He went too deep! He’s not going to come up in time!” added Sasabe, his finger pointed at Makoto as his body writhed steadily towards the middle.

“If he comes up too late, he might get disqualified!” said Rei, his hands now clawing at his hair, but just as everyone was getting consumed by panic, Sasabe clenched his fist and finally whipped the megaphone to his lips. There was only one thing to do for Makoto, and it was to let him know he wasn’t alone.

“ _Go, go, go, go, go, Makotooo!_ ” shouted Sasabe, and the sheer volume of his voice ringing across the stadium finally snapped the others back to their senses. Everyone raised their hands to their mouths now, joining him in shouting, _Go, go, go, go, go, Makoto!_

* * *

Inside, Nagisa had been rushing from corridor to corridor, wrist twitching upward at every other juncture to check his watch. As the minutes ticked away, he began losing hope of finding Haru in time for the race to start. Then, just as he was nearing another turn, he skidded to a halt in shock. A faint rumble spread across the stadium.

Nagisa paled as he looked at the time again. It was now 11:10 am. Makoto’s race had officially begun, and all Nagisa could possibly hope for now was to find Haru at all before the second heat of backstroke ended, before Makoto reached the wall to discover that not even Nagisa could make it back in time to watch him swim.

Little did he know that a just few more turns ahead, Haru slipped out of the showers in his jacket and tracksuit pants, falling to pieces on the nearest bench. His eyes were now dry and blank beneath the damp veil of his hair. The water could wash off the dead grime of the pool, but left him with no relief, direction, or desire to even exist, let alone move. Time melted onto him like a coat of see-through film and he was thirteen years old again, standing by the pool at the Iwatobi Swimming Club with Rin kneeling in tears in front of him.

 _Back then… If Rin had won, would I feel differently now?_ he asked himself, to no avail. Picking up the broken pieces of himself, the mosaic he tried to put back together kept fracturing beyond recognition or repair.

Had Rin felt the same way all those years ago? Haru was no longer sure. As long as he had known him, Rin always had a drive, a direction, a purpose. From the moment he started pestering Haruka about the relay, he had been working towards his ultimate goal, the dream of becoming an Olympic swimmer.

 _What about me?_ Haruka asked himself, a drop of water rolling down his cheek from a wet tuft of hair. _Why do I swim..?_

“ _Hey!_ Haru-chan!”

Haru just barely turned his head, watching Nagisa run towards him. He had quite forgotten about the others. Or, perhaps, he merely wanted to.

“There you are!” cried Nagisa as he all but collapsed by Haruka’s bench, hands grasping the folds of his tracksuit shorts as he doubled over out of breath. “Come on, hurry! Mako-chan’s race has already started!”

Haru stared back at him bleakly from behind the fog that descended over his eyes. Lost in that gray mist, it all seemed like nonsense, a waste of time and energy to move from the bench. What use was hurrying if the race had already started? What difference would it make, could _he_ make to Makoto, now that the water was dead and everything Haru fought for was in ruin?

Makoto was strong and capable. Surely he didn’t need Haru anymore…

“I’ll pass,” he said quietly, but after Nagisa had spent a quarter of an hour hunting after him, he was not about to take no for an answer.

“I don’t think so! He’s your friend, isn’t he?!” he snapped at Haruka, whose eyes widened as they darted back to Nagisa. “Isn’t Mako-chan important to you?!”

Haru’s jaw fell, but no sound came out. Nagisa gritted his teeth.

“Well, _you’re_ important to _him_ , so _let’s **go!**_ ” he cried, then seized Haru’s wrist in an iron grip to tug him off the bench, dragging him all the way to the nearest exit.

* * *

Nagisa and Haru soon burst through the doors, where they found themselves a few rows above the lowest point of the spectators’ balcony, Nagisa searching frantically for Makoto in lane six as their eyes adjusted to the light.

Despite his best efforts, they had missed Makoto’s last-minute power dive, and the way he almost ran out of breath before he broke onto the surface, but the heat was not over yet. Makoto himself was now pulling towards the wall, his arms rotating frantically like a pair of living oars as he struggled to catch up.

“There!” said Nagisa with his finger pointed, then their eyes grew large as a string of chants hit their ears: Coach Sasabe and the others cheering for Makoto.

“Swim, swim, swim, swim, swim, Makoto!” _Swim, swim, swim, swim, swim, Makoto!_

“Not loud enough!” they heard Sasabe snap at the others. “You’ve gotta shout from your diaphragm! Especially _you,_ Rei! This is no time to be shy!”

“ _Y-Yes!_ ” cried Rei in response.

“Fight, fight, fight, fight, fight, Makoto!” roared Sasabe again through the megaphone, the others repeating his words like a prayer: _Fight, fight, fight, fight, fight, Makoto!_

And fight Makoto did, his face hardened in concentration as he cut a path across the water that yielded to him with froth and foam, no longer stagnant, but vivid and teeming with life. Haruka stared at him in absolute reverie. A few feet away, Nagisa smothered a chuckle and left him to join the others, contenting himself with having kept his promise to Makoto.

Just as Nagisa ran over to the others and plopped down beside Rei, Makoto broke into a tumble, then kicked himself away from the wall. The swim club grew louder at once, with everyone rising to the railing to cheer for Makoto on his way back.

“Last spurt, last spurt, last spurt, last spurt!” _Last spurt, last spurt, last spurt, last spurt!_

Haru could finally see how far Makoto had fallen behind the others. Having just made the turn, he was in eighth place despite the impressive boost of his kick. Any chances of placing was now beyond his reach, yet Makoto continued to pull his arms as though nothing mattered except moving forward. The water crackled in his wake, and Haru’s heart jolted as that same energy shot right through him. Makoto soon passed a swimmer, he was now gaining on another… _Almost there… just a little more…!_

Makoto’s head knocked against the wall in the finish. Haru could see him visibly plunge, then scramble to his feet and stumble against the lane rope, one hand grabbing on before he might have dipped below again. The billboard flashed.

_5 – Tachibana Makoto_

“ _YOU MADE IT!_ ” came the unified cry of the Iwatobi Swim Club, but Haru flinched, his eyes darting from the others to his friend below. _He made it?_ What did that mean? Makoto obviously didn’t qualify, so weren’t they supposed to say _Good job,_ or _Way to go_? Did something happen while Haru wasn’t there, something that nearly cost Makoto the race..?

Haru’s eyes narrowed in fear. Down at the pool, Makoto finally managed to crawl out and stand, but one hand still pressed against his head where it had connected to the wall in his frenzy to reach it. He was heaving, Haru could tell by the jumps of his chest, but Makoto soon lifted his head towards the spectators’ benches… and then his breath hitched at the sight of Haruka standing by the entrance, not far away from the others in yellow.

Their eyes met. Haruka’s heart trembled beneath the jacket.

The next moment, he lowered his eyes to the ground and turned his head, missing the broken smile that spread across Makoto’s face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter once contained a _Cromartie High School_ reference because I like that series, and imagined that Makoto might be involved in interaction while staring at the balcony in wait. I now replaced that part with a more fitting _High Speed! 2_ reference instead, but for those who got a kick out of the original reference, here's the removed scene in its entirety (sorry about the lack of spacing in advance):
> 
> Makoto soon stepped outside to join his fellow swimmers, saying a muted Hello before lifting his head towards the spectators’ benches in search of the Iwatobi Swim Club. The backstroke swimmers’ gathering point lay further away from the starting blocks, but after a few seconds of looking around, Makoto managed to catch a familiar cluster by the railing. His eyes fell on a small flash of yellow and blue, a blob of red, and a black clump above them – Kou’s tracksuit, Sasabe’s gaudy flower shirt, and Ama-chan’s parasol. He was vaguely aware that the other swimmers were talking, but their words blurred into background static, until one of them nudged him in the arm. Makoto yelped and turned to them wide-eyed, then relaxed at their friendly faces.  
> “I said, what’s your name?” asked the boy who bumped his arm, the shortest person in their group, though he was but two inches below Makoto’s height.  
> “Oh. Tachibana Makoto. Nice to meet you,” replied Makoto with a polite smile, his eyes darting back and forth between the swimmers and his friends.  
> “Have you ever competed before?”  
> “N-No.. this is my first tournament,” said Makoto after a moment’s pause.  
> “Told you it wasn’t him,” said one of the boys to another, who elbowed him in the side in response.  
> “Pardon?” said Makoto with a small shake of his head, his attention obviously divided. The boy gave him a good-natured hmph.  
> “This guy kept telling me you might be his long lost rival from his first juvie.”  
> “Shut up..!”  
> The word rival reminded him of Rin, and Makoto’s laugh nearly dipped into bitterness.  
> “No, I don’t believe I have a rival.”  
> “Do you want one?” asked the other with a grin. This time, he got kicked in the calf for it.  
> “Shut up, Hayashida!”  
> Makoto raised his hands in surrender.  
> “No, I’m fine, thank you,” he replied with a troubled look. His eyes flitted away again. The first swimmer gave him a curious look.  
> “What school are you from?” he asked with another nudge. Makoto turned back again.  
> “Iwatobi High School. ..You?”  
> “Cromartie High School. We are the champions, my friend!”  
> “Ah,” sighed Makoto.  
> His gaze drifted back to the benches again, eyes widening as another blob of yellow appeared by the entrance and joined the others. Judging by his dynamic movement down the stairs, and his size compared to Kou, Makoto concluded that it had to be Rei. Nagisa and Haru were still nowhere to be seen.  
> “Well, good luck to you!” said the boy from Cromartie High School. Makoto nodded without even looking. The others laughed, shaking their heads at how jittery the Iwatobi swimmer turned out to be, then resumed conversation that no longer invited Makoto’s contributions.  
> Makoto was actually glad for it. He continued to scout the benches even as they were joined by the last two swimmers, then asked by an organizer to form a single file on their way to the starting blocks. Makoto was forced to comply, but once he joined the line and found his pace, his head turned to the Iwatobi Swim Club again with an anxious look.


	41. EPISODE 8: Revenge in the Medley! - Part 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _You were wrong_ , Makoto told the voice. _Haru came back for me after all…!_

He could still feel the top of his head pulse beneath his palm, eyes squinting with each dull throb of pain flashing down to his jaw, but the ache of Makoto’s skull, or his guilt over failing his event seemed nothing compared to his relief. More than anything, he swelled with the overwhelming urge to rush down the hallway and up to the balcony, where Haru stood waiting for him.

The billboard flashed again behind his back.

_Tachibana Makoto – DISQUALIFIED_

_5 – Uozumi Takuya_

Haru’s heart jolted as Makoto’s name turned gray among a sea of glaring white, then disappeared from the board completely, but Makoto didn’t even notice. After his initial shock over seeing Haruka again, he let out a sob of laughter, then took a few wobbling steps towards the exit nearest to him. However, the moment he started to advance, Haru flinched and instinctively retreated, not towards the exit to meet Makoto halfway, but visibly shrinking away from sight. Makoto stopped at once, jaw falling as he tried to cry out to the other, but his throat turned barren and dry. His shoulders stiffened as he shoved himself forward for the length of another step, then watched Haru twitch backwards again, until he finally disappeared among the benches.

Makoto stared blankly in his direction, his heartbeat roaring in his ears, then lowered his head to the ground. The voice won. His heart popped like a balloon and his relief came pouring out like sand, streaming away from his clumsy grip until Makoto looked like a husk of his former self, painfully reminiscent of Haru after his defeat.

Up by the railing, the near-united Iwatobi Swim Club stood crestfallen at the sight of the changing billboard, then hung their eyes anxiously on Makoto, but no amount of silent pleas could force him to move and join them. A swarm of organizers scattered about him, in stark contrast to his paralyzed form. Above them, Nagisa stole a quick glance at Haru, blinking in confusion when he finally spotted his friend crouching behind a row of chairs. Nagisa turned his head to Makoto again. He still stood by the pool like he had been cast onto the tile, his body facing the stairs where Haru used to be…

“Mako-chaaan!” cried Nagisa at the top of his lungs, but his voice seemed to die at some invisible barrier around Makoto where nothing reached, not even the constant motion of others around him. The swim club exchanged worried glances. Rei began to suspect another panic attack, and the others, less informed, arrived at similar conclusions.

“He looked kind of dazed,” said Sasabe at last with a small scratch of his chin.

“Maybe he’s feeling sick?” suggested Ama-chan. Kou gave her a startled look and turned back to Makoto, her heart beating fiercely at the sight of another unforeseen disaster. Seeing Haru demolished by Onii-chan was enough. To watch Makoto meet the same end on his own was just too much.

“Rei-kun, we need to go down to him!” she said as she shoved her booklet into Ama-chan’s free hand, who just barely managed to hold onto it.

“Ah, of course! At once!” gasped Rei.

He and Kou then pushed themselves up and off the bench to go and fetch Makoto, Rei holding the door open for her and letting it slam behind their backs as they hurried down the corridor.

Nagisa remained by the railing. He turned and shot Haru a glare from afar, nodding his head hard towards the exit, but Haru only tensed at the obvious reproach, raised himself off the ground just enough not to be seen below, then retreated towards the exit until the shadows swallowed him completely, anxious and unable to face Makoto.

* * *

The third heat was about to start when Rei and Kou burst into the pool area, skidding to a halt when they saw the upcoming swimmers, then breaking into a sprint to reach Makoto before the organizers might remove him by force. They all but slammed into their friend and clung to his sides, pressing carelessly to his cold, wet skin. Makoto let out a startled gasp. How long had he been standing there..?

“This way, Makoto-san,” said Rei in a hushed voice as he and Kou began guiding Makoto away from the pool and towards the exit, their arms thrown around his back for support.

“Are you alright, Makoto-senpai?” asked Kou in a small voice. “Does your head hurt? You looked like you hit it really hard in the finish..”

At her reminder, pain poured down Makoto’s right eye and forced it shut.

“Yeah…” came his breathless reply. They were now climbing the stairs two steps at a time.

“Don’t worry, Makoto-san, we’re almost there,” said Rei to his right, but Makoto half wished they would just leave him alone instead of dragging him to the balcony, where Haru so obviously didn’t want him to be.

* * *

“Mako-chan..!” cried Nagisa in relief when Makoto appeared in the doorway, Kou under his right arm and Rei joining them a moment later.

“Here he comes,” said Sasabe in a jovial voice, his megaphone tucked away by his hip. “Sorry to see you got disqualified, but your last spurt was really something!”

Makoto stared at him blankly. _Disqualified..?_

“Oh well, don’t worry too much. You did well for your first time,” said Ama-chan with a light clap of her hands. She flashed her student a soothing smile, but Makoto paled and hung his head.

“I’m.. I’m sorry,” he said, unable to look at the others. “I failed my entry and then just couldn’t keep up. Please forgive me.”

“Don’t be sorry, Mako-chan,” said Nagisa in a soft tone as he stood up and attached himself to Makoto’s chest in a hug. “You did your best and that’s what counts!”

Makoto tensed.

“That’s just it. I didn’t,” he replied in a dull whisper. “I’m sorry.”

Sasabe and Amakata exchanged glances, but Sasabe could only shrug his shoulders, and Ama-chan quirked her brow in reply, both turning back to Makoto for an explanation that wasn’t forthcoming. Kou gave him an indulgent rub on his lower back.

“Well, you did seem kinda distracted at the start, Makoto-senpai,” she risked in a tentative tone that inquired, rather than chided him for the late entry. “Why were you looking up instead of forward?”

Makoto clenched his jaw, then turned his head sheepishly. Behind him, Rei lowered his head with a guilty frown, wondering if Haruka-senpai’s presence was truly the difference between disqualification and fifth, even fourth place…

“I believe he was hoping to see Haruka-senpai, who ought to have been here with us to provide support,” he said, then fixed his glasses when Makoto’s flushed cheeks confirmed his theory. “But that is irrelevant now,” continued Rei in a dismissive tone, taking careful hold of Makoto’s arm to guide him towards one of the empty seats. “What’s important right now is for Makoto-san to rest and recover. He still has the two-hundred meter event coming up in the afternoon, after all. How are you feeling, Makoto-san? Is your headache severe? Should I get you medicine?”

“Ah, you hit it in the finish, right?” asked Nagisa. “I’ll get you some ice for it and a nice drink, Mako-chan!” he offered with an eager smile, and when Makoto didn’t say no and Rei smiled in approval, Nagisa gave them a wink and hurried off, heading to the exit where Haruka had hidden himself away.

* * *

The sight of Nagisa approaching with alarming speed startled Haruka into tearing past the door and down the corridor, but all he could do was duck behind the farthest vending machine before Nagisa reached the entrance and stepped into the hallway after him. Haru flattened himself against the cold steel side of the machine, his breath held back. Nagisa purposefully slowed his stride, eventually stopping in front of the soda dispenser just two feet away from Haruka. He cupped his chin at the display of over two dozen enticing alternatives behind the glass. He could hear Haru relinquish his stale breath, drawing a new one as quietly as though his life depended on it. It made Nagisa want to laugh an exasperated, bitter laugh that washed at his throat, but never came. Instead, Nagisa inhaled slowly and steadied himself, crossing drink after drink off the list in his head.

“Don’t worry, Haru-chan, I’m not gonna make you come with me,” he said in a light, casual tone as he ruled out the energy drinks, then started pondering his choices between fruit juice and carbonated soda. Haru pursed his lips behind his cover. “I’m just going to get a drink and some ice for Mako-chan’s head. He hit it pretty hard in the finish.”

A small hitch of breath. Nagisa’s finger now hovered over a handful of possible buttons.

“He was looking for you, you know,” he continued in that same nonchalant tone, wondering which flavor would appeal to Makoto more, orange or kiwi. “He got worried after you lost to Rin-chan, and wanted to go and see if you were okay.”

Haru’s throat grew tight. Nagisa smiled and shook his head as he settled for an orange soda, fit for a Tachibana.

“Rei-chan told Mako-chan to stay with us, and I told him you were probably taking a shower and would be back when you were done, but you never came back so Mako-chan ran off anyway,” Nagisa carried on as he fished the soda can out of the machine, then stepped over to the other to look for the ice button. “Right before backstroke, too! We ran after him and told him not to look for you right now, what with his event coming up and all, and then we all bumped into Rin-chan somehow. He was so mean, Rin-chan.. he yelled at Mako-chan and even Rei-chan! He was all, _Shut up, I beat Haru, that’s all I care about_ ,” he groused in an impressive imitation of Rin’s angry whispers. “And then Rin-chan brushed us off like we weren’t even friends or anything! Aaah, haha, you should have seen Mako-chan! He wanted to go after Rin-chan and beat him up for being so mean..!”

Haru’s eyes widened. A small gasp escaped him. Nagisa giggled.

“Or at least, that’s what it looked like to me,” he added as he pressed the button. Ice came tumbling out of the dispenser into a plastic cup below. “Mako-chan is really nice, but he’s still human like the rest of us. He stopped the moment we told him not to go though, and then he got really scared because you weren’t around to watch him swim. I was running for like half an hour trying to find you… and in the end, we missed the start. Rei-chan told me Mako-chan messed it up. He said Mako-chan made his dive too late, and went so deep he only came up halfway. I guess that’s what got him disqualified. Poor Mako-chan… Rei-chan thinks he was looking for you and that’s why it all went downhill like that, because he was worried you weren’t there and missed the signal…”

Haru’s eyes grew foggy, his heartbeat slowing to a pathetic crawl. Nagisa let out a small huff as he plucked the cup of ice loose from the dispenser.

“Well, I’m gonna go back and give these to Mako-chan. But you _are_ going to watch us swim from now on, right, Haru-chan?”

Haru’s next breath turned into a long, defeated sigh. Nagisa shook his head, mustering his bravado one more time.

“Well, you’d better watch, Haru-chan, cause I’m gonna be next and I want you to cheer for me, you got that? And then it’s Rei-chan, and after lunch they’ll start the two-hundred meter events, so Mako-chan will get to swim again! Make sure you don’t miss _that_ , Haru-chan!”

Still in hiding, Haru closed his eyes and nodded, feeling as though Nagisa could see right through the steel and plastic of his cover. A few feet away, Nagisa’s hand tightened on the cup in disappointment at not even getting an audible reply.

“Goodbye, Haru-chan,” he said as he turned towards the exit, his tone having lost all its flare. “Just stand somewhere we can see you and cheer for us, alright? See you soon.”

He then left the hallway before Haruka had a chance to reply, preferring to flee and miss the answer over staying to hear no answer at all.

* * *

While Nagisa was gone, Kou fished out a towel from her bag and offered it to Makoto, who slowly rubbed himself dry while Kou and Rei talked of how his last spurt was incredible, how much Makoto’s control and dolphin kick had improved, and how pacing oneself for the two-hundred meter was very important not to lose steam on the final stretch. Makoto did his best to at least hum in acknowledgement until Nagisa’s return, but once Nagisa returned, then turned the hand towel into a makeshift cold compress for him, Makoto seemed to relax a little more. He thanked Nagisa and took the drink from him next, finishing it in a few long gulps.

“Feeling better, Mako-chan?” asked Nagisa. Makoto broke into a subdued smile.

“Yeah. Thank you.. everyone,” he replied, glancing from Nagisa to Rei, then Kou, who were standing on either side of him. “Even though I let you down, you are being really nice about it, and I’m grateful for that.”

Kou gave him a tender smile.

“Don’t worry about it, Makoto-senpai,” she said in a cheerful tone. “You still have the two-hundred meter backstroke, and supporting each other is what friends are for, right?”

Makoto’s heart jumped. Rei gave his back a light pat.

“That’s right, Makoto-san. So please feel better soon, because it’s almost time for us to cheer for Nagisa-kun!”

“Yup!” said Nagisa with a grin. “You’ll cheer for me, right, Mako-chan?”

Makoto pursed his lips, then then burst into soft, defeated laughter.

“Alright, _alright_. I’ll be fine. And I’ll cheer for you. Do your best, Nagisa!”

Nagisa gave him a wink.

“You bet, Mako-chan! Wish me luck, everyone!”

“Good luck!” cried the others in chorus as Nagisa rushed off towards the assembly area, followed by eager glances and the cautious gaze of Haruka, who had since moved back to the shade outside, staring at the others as though the distance were immense, and his body too frail to risk it.

Nobody seemed to notice him. Not even Makoto was looking for him anymore, so all Haru permitted himself was to watch them as longing and loathing clashed inside him, any guilt or shame blotted out by the eclipse of his own immeasurable loss. His heart pulsed like a dying star with every thought of the water, himself, and Rin, but Haru trusted none of them to comprehend his pain, or how the weight of it was crushing his shoulders. Not when they seemed to blame him for what happened to Makoto – or was it simply an excuse to chastise Haru for daring to nurse his own wounds? He hardly knew, but lost in a million gashes of himself, he couldn’t help but think them cruel and selfish for expecting him to linger around after… after _that_. Yet Nagisa told him to stay and show solidarity, as if Haruka’s presence made any difference to anyone in the heat of a race, where your heart pounds and your senses, your mind, your every atom burns and expands in sheer ecstasy… something Haru would never feel again. Didn’t they understand how much he had lost today, or three years ago? _Of course not_. His parents, friends, and acquaintances always pretended to know him or what was best for him, but Haru knew better. How could anyone possibly understand the bleakness of his situation, the graveyard maze of his present, or the uncharted night of his future?

 _Not when Makoto has a headache_ , thought Haruka in aching bitterness, certain in his heart of hearts that if he just swallowed his pride and walked over right now, if he just crossed the distance and stood in front of Makoto in silence, not even a _hello_ or a _sorry_ , just silence, Makoto would be glad to see him. He might even cock his injured head with a smile, and Haruka would hate him, he would hate him so much for being so different from anyone Haru had ever known. Even if Haruka frowned, or turned his head, or behaved extremely ill, Makoto would never be angry, nor would he push Haru away for deserting him when it counted the most. Makoto never thought of himself. He was unbearably selfless, and noble, and contemptible, but if Makoto could just be a little selfish and push him away, _just this once,_ Haru would not feel half so horrible for wanting to be absorbed in himself so much, curled up into a small bleeding world of his own, and blocking out everyone else forever.

But Makoto would not be angry with Haru for abandoning him. He could never be as petty as Haruka felt right now, and Makoto’s faintest smile of gladness (or worse, _gratitude_ ) would make Haru want to tear himself to shreds for feeling so undeserving of him.

* * *

While Haru continued to wrestle his feelings in the dark, Nagisa changed into gear and joined his fellow breaststrokers below, chatting his nerves away at a boy who reminded him of Haru-chan until they were told to head out to the starting blocks. There he adjusted his goggles and clenched his fists, telling himself that Rei-chan and the others were all cheering for him. Should he manage to advance, they would certainly walk away from prefecturals with a bigger budget. _Ah, how awesome that would be!_ thought Nagisa as his mind drifted to home. He pursed his lips. If he could just place at his event, he would be untouchable at the dinner table tonight. _That alone would be worth it!_

He stepped onto the block, taking a breath so large his cheeks puffed red and round. He could almost feel the eyes of the others without even looking, even Haru…

“Ready. Set. _Go!_ ”

Nagisa launched forward with a flawless arch, and this time, Coach Sasabe and the swim club were more than ready for him.

“Go, go, go, go, go, go, Nagisa!” cried Sasabe into the megaphone, followed by an echo of four crying, _Go, go, go, go, go, go, Nagisa!_

Haruka was the only one silent, too embarrassed to chant on his own, but even he watched in mild interest as Nagisa bobbed towards the wall, wondering what was moving him forward when he had admittedly never experienced the thrill of being chased by a rival. Did Nagisa feel anything at all? Did he even hear the others shouting his name?

“Swim, swim, swim, swim, swim, Nagisa!” _Swim, swim, swim, swim, swim, Nagisa!_

Haru couldn’t be sure, but something about the water seemed to carry Nagisa just as it had carried Makoto. Once he tumbled, Nagisa started stretching himself in earnest, as though he were growing an inch with every stroke. All eyes hung upon him with anticipation, Kou and Ama-chan clinging to each other until Nagisa’s hand touched the wall.

The billboard lit up.

_3 – Hazuki Nagisa_

“ _WAY TO GO!_ ” cried the others above as Nagisa lifted his eyes to the billboard. He heaved a sigh, perfectly convinced dinner would be unbearable that night, then noted with better feelings how two tiers above his name shone the name of the morose, taciturn boy he had talked to earlier:

_1 – Kirishima Ikuya_

Up on the balcony, Haruka’s eyes narrowed, then fell to the side with a frown. They had once been classmates in junior high, he and Kirishima, but for all the time they had spent together in the same classroom and as members of the same club, the name now rang as empty to him as any other.

* * *

Nagisa joined the others a few minutes later, lips pursed and fists held stiffly to his sides as if third place were nothing short of a disgrace. He plodded over to the swim club, turned around to face them, then gritted his teeth with an exasperated growl.

“I couldn’t do it!” he groaned as he hung his head.

“It was really close,” said Sasabe, who moved over to place his hands on Nagisa’s thin shoulders, kneading them until Nagisa squeaked for mercy.

“You made such a huge push at the end,” said Kou with warmth and pride.

“You definitely set a new personal best! I’m very proud of you, Nagisa-kun!” joined in Rei.

Nagisa stopped whining in Sasabe’s grasp at once, his entire face flushed an odd shade of pink.

“Congratulations, Nagisa!” joined in Makoto, who cocked his head to the side and then let go of his damp compress, balancing it on his head while he clapped his hands. Forlorn as Makoto looked earlier, his grin now shone bright, and felt utterly contagious.

“Thank you, Mako-chan, Rei-chan.. everyone!” blurted Nagisa, who finally let out a small, awkward laugh, no longer unhappy about third place or so worried about the dinner table.

“Well, I believe it’s my turn at last,” said Rei as he straightened with a smart push of his glasses. Nagisa’s eyes widened. Even Makoto was peering up from beneath his compress with curiosity.

“Ready, Rei?” asked Coach Sasabe in a challenging tone. “Will I finally see the Iwatobi Anvil fly?”

Rei let out a horrified choke at the nickname, but quickly recovered and flashed Sasabe a smug smirk.

“I will show you, Sasabe-sensei, that the small and struggling caterpillar you once knew has since cocooned and emerged a beautiful butterfly!” he replied with his hands thrown on his hips. “Feast your eyes on me and I shall show you my ultimate butterfly form!” he cried as he thrust his arms into the air like they were thin, stick-like wings. Ama-chan put on a polite smile for him, but Kou just barely smothered her giggles.

“Rei-chan, don’t jinx yourself…” mumbled Nagisa. Makoto coughed into his hand.

“Good luck, Rei,” he managed to say with another happy grin.

“Break a leg, Rei-chan!” added Nagisa, earning another strangled sound from Rei.

“Please don’t wish me injuries so carelessly, Nagisa-kun!”

“Just go and do your best, Rei-kun!” said Kou as well. “We are counting on you!”

“Don’t worry, everyone! I shall not disappoint! Despite what you might think, competition tends to bring out the best of my abilities!” declared Rei, then swiftly turned towards the exit, thoroughly glad nobody saw his sudden change of complexion as he floundered to the assembly area more like a constipated penguin than his stroke’s graceful namesake.

“He seems kind of… stiff,” noted Kou with a dull glare.

“He was pretty nervous last night,” whispered Nagisa. “Even though he’s been swimming every summer to maintain his form, too…”

“Well, no matter what happens, he can’t be worse than me,” said Makoto, and quick to smile and laugh at himself, he managed to make everyone else laugh too.

* * *

During the final heats of breaststroke, Rei changed, did his warm-up stretches twice, then sat down with his legs folded to meditate on the upcoming butterfly event, mentally guiding himself through the motions and envisioning his perfect finish by the wall. His breathing soon eased into rhythmic inhales and exhales, shoulders lax and stomach perfectly content. By the time he had to leave for the pool, Rei marched with his head held high, and his legs a little less stiff than they had looked before. He now focused solely on the flawless trajectory he projected in his mind, and one singular objective: to be a paragon for everyone present. A shining example for Makoto-san, hope and encouragement for Nagisa-kun, a display of Kou-san’s managerial excellence, and comfort to Haruka-senpai in his hour of need.

The others gathered by the railing as the moment of truth drew near. Further away, Haru stood on the stairs with his breath held back.

Rei assumed his stance, his mind crystal clear. The water below now seemed just another stretch of bright blue sky to test his wings.

“Ready. Set… _Go!_ ”

Rei unfurled himself and leaped off the block as lightly as birds break into flight, soaring through the air and slipping into the water in an elegant start.

“His form is perfect!” breathed Coach Sasabe, everyone watching with eager faces as Rei emerged from his fluid dolphin kicks, then broke into a fast and calculated butterfly. If Rei had jinxed himself, the jinx improved his form. He was pulling ahead of the majority before he even made his turn, proof that the training camp truly did pay off for at least one swimmer, who had to exert himself above the rest whenever he was swimming his signature stroke in the ocean.

“Rei-chan’s faster than ever!” cheered Nagisa, his hands wringing the railing hard enough to turn his knuckles white. “Just look at him go!”

“He’s already fourth! _Third!_ ” cried Makoto, at which point Coach Sasabe finally remembered his megaphone, cursing himself a little for gawking at Rei for so long.

“Last spurt, last spurt, last spurt, last spurt!” he blared for the others, who followed up with another _Last spurt, last spurt, last spurt, last spurt!_

On the stairs, Haru’s hands twitched into fists, clenching and unclenching as Rei broke into flight on the last twenty five meters. Haruka’s legs trembled slightly in the effort to keep still. _Second place… almost there..!_

Rei burst forward and his hands slammed on the wall in perfect symmetry, his head jolting backwards in a desperate gasp for breath as the others held back theirs.

The billboard flashed. Haruka’s heart skipped a beat.

_1 – Ryuugazaki Rei_

“ ** _YOU DID IT!_** ” roared the Iwatobi Swim Club, and below in the water, the prefecture’s number one butterfly seemed to bounce in one place with his face buried in his hands, nearly missing how Nagisa waved at him with his arms in full swing, then made a dash for the stairs to be the first to greet the victor.

* * *

Rei hoisted himself out the pool at once, then hurried to the exit to meet Nagisa half way, but he could not even reach the stairs before Nagisa came flying down at him, missing the final steps and crashing into Rei’s open arms. The two stumbled backwards as though they were engaged in a dynamic, clumsy dance. Rei let out a shaky sigh.

“Nagisa-kun, be careful—” he tried to say, only to be silenced by Nagisa’s lips pressing against his in a chaste but fervent kiss. Rei’s eyes widened in shock. “N-Nagisa-kun..!”

Nagisa merely stared back at him with quivering shoulders, his eyes large and brimming with tears, but before Rei could lift his hands to wipe them away, Nagisa pressed his forehead to Rei’s shoulder, letting his tears roll down Rei’s chest in hot streaks.

“I love you, Rei-chan..” mumbled Nagisa, his words dripping as badly as his face. Rei shook his head with a tender smile.

“You’re just saying that because I managed to secure an actual budget for the swim club,” he teased, but his words only made Nagisa cling a little more tightly to his back.

“No..” came his flustered whine from below. Rei clicked his tongue in a small _tsk_.

“Nagisa-kun… didn’t we agree to wait until we were older..?” he mumbled as he drew Nagisa a little closer, rubbing soft circles over his back.

“This was really urgent,” whispered Nagisa to his collarbone, only pulling back enough to wipe at his wet cheeks and make a few wet snorts to control the sudden flow of his nose. “I had to show Rei-chan how happy I am! Your swimming was so good, you even outshone Haru-chan!”

Rei finally colored to the tips of his ears, and not just because of the disgusting snorts Nagisa was making with reckless abandon.

“Now, now, Nagisa-kun…” he said with a sheepish smile. “Haruka-senpai and I are hardly comparable on account of our different strokes—”

To stem the tide of an hour-long explanation on the differences between front crawl and butterfly swimmers, Nagisa nudged against him on tiptoes to steal another kiss. Rei choked against his lips.

“ _Nagisa-kun..! Not until we’re older!!_ ”

“Rei-chan was so cute, I couldn’t help myself..!” laughed Nagisa, his face alarmingly red and his snorts growing louder until Rei placed a firm hand against the back of his head, pressing Nagisa to his shoulder again to stifle those terrible, terrible sounds.

“You are incorrigible,” mumbled Rei with flushed cheeks.

Not wanting to keep the swim club waiting long, or explain how he managed to reduce Nagisa to a wobbly crying mess, he gathered Nagisa to his side and pulled him up the stairs, thoroughly glad nobody saw them. “Come on now.. back to the others, Nagisa-kun.”

* * *

“There you are!” called out Sasabe as Rei and Nagisa reappeared, Nagisa’s face still wet, but his cheeks no longer so flushed. “Congratulations, Rei!”

A moment later, Makoto put down his compress. He and Kou then sprung up from the bench to ambush Rei and Nagisa in a bear hug, squeezing them mercilessly as Haruka watched them from afar in growing wretchedness.

“Rei, you were amazing!” cried Makoto with such passion, it made Rei color something fierce.

“Rei-kun, that was your best time yet!” cheered Kou. “And now the swim club is going to advance to regionals!”

“Um, not quite, Matsuoka-san,” spoke Ama-chan some ways behind them, startling her students into whirling around in disbelief. “Make that _one member_ advancing to regionals. Unless Tachibana-kun and Hazuki-kun place as well, only Ryuugazaki-kun will be officially approved to attend the next tournament, and anyone else will have to come as spectators and pay for themselves… Sorry for spoiling your happiness like that,” she added when she saw their fallen faces. “But try to think of it as incentive to place at the two-hundred meter events so you can attend together!”

“Alright! I’m gonna make sure I do better in the afternoon so I can attend with Rei-chan!” said Nagisa at once with an enthusiastic nod.

“And I, I promise I will do my best, too,” joined in Makoto, though he seemed a lot less certain of himself than Nagisa. The others, however, appreciated his words and gave him reassuring smiles.

“That’s the spirit, Hazuki-kun, Tachibana-kun! Now, I do believe there will be a lunch break in ten minutes,” continued Ama-chan, now earning more positive attention and very hopeful looks from her students. “Shall we get going? We can have lunch at the station, and then we should be back in time for Tachibana-kun’s event.”

“That sounds great! I’m _starving,_ ” moaned Nagisa.

As everyone gathered their things to leave, Makoto turned his head towards Haruka, who tensed, fidgeted, then shrank into an empty seat by the stairs. Makoto creased his brow. He had been ignoring Haru until now, more for Haru’s sake than from any conviction of his own, but lunch seemed like the perfect opportunity to speak to him, the chance Makoto had been waiting for.

“Please give me a minute, everyone,” he said to the others, then turned away to walk over to Haruka, his steps slow and careful as though he were approaching a timid kitten. Behind him, the others looked on in wait, while Haruka lowered his head, fixing his eyes on the back of the seat in front of him. He should have left right after Rei’s event. The closer Makoto drew, probably to act as if nothing was wrong, the more Haru wanted to take flight and hide away, back to the cozy familiarity of self-imposed isolation, where he could dwell on his loss and his mistakes without reproach or pity from anyone.

Except Makoto wasn’t going to let him have his way so easily, if at all. If the training camp had been any indication, Makoto much preferred to have things _his_ way.

“Haru..” came his voice from above. Haru’s eyes fell to Makoto’s sneakers, stopping himself from following up the sagging folds of his tracksuit pants. “Listen.. it’s lunch time now, and everyone is going to the station to eat together.”

Haru gave no sign of having acknowledged him. Makoto drew a sharp breath.

“Why don’t you come with us, Haru? I don’t think you’ve eaten anything since breakfast.”

At his mention of breakfast, Haru could feel his stomach tremble.

“I’m not hungry,” he said, loud enough to mask the weak grumble he knew was coming. His voice rasped low and dry from having kept silent for so long. Makoto bit his lip.

“But, Haru, you already had a race, and you must be tired from exerting yourself,” he said in that worrywart tone Haruka had come to know so well. “I think.. that eating lunch and being with friends would be good for you.”

“I don’t want to go,” replied Haruka, and when he heard Makoto take another breath (to nag him, _he always nags_ ), Haru lifted his head and gave Makoto a look hard enough to stun him silent. “I’d rather be alone. Do you understand?”

Makoto hesitated, his fingers curling defensively to his palms.

“Okay, Haru,” he said at last in a quiet tone. “If you don’t want to come, I won’t force you.”

Haru closed his eyes in relief. Makoto was sensible after all.

“But.. if you’re not coming, can I bring you something from the station?” he heard Makoto say, and Haru’s patience collapsed like a house of cards. “Something like take-out, or a bento, or a sandwich, and a drink and maybe a dessert, if you like. If you don’t want to eat with us, you could just have it here, or go to the assembly area, or you could—”

“ _Do whatever you want,_ ” replied Haruka with more sharpness than necessary. Makoto’s breath hitched… but would it be enough to discourage him..?

“I… I will bring you something, then,” he managed to say, his voice growing smaller. “So please, just stay here and rest, Haru.”

 _Of course not,_ though Haru as he closed his eyes and sighed, neither nodding nor shaking his head. Makoto’s eyes fell to the ground.

“I’ll be back soon, Haru,” he said, and when Haru gave no reply, Makoto turned away and walked back to the others, his head lowered and shoulders hunched as though he hadn’t just gotten his way once again.

Haru kept his eyes on the back of the seat in front of him as Makoto joined the others, saying something that the whole group acknowledged with a nod. Within a minute, everyone passed through the nearest exit, heading downstairs with only a glance spared at Haruka. Abandoned in his seat, Haru cracked a bitter smile. Makoto was not so perfect after all. _He’s a busybody, he worries too much, and he never, ever respects anyone’s wishes._

The smile withered almost instantly as Haru’s head bonked against the back of the seat in front of him. Why wouldn’t they let him go home, when he couldn’t even bear to be civil to his best friend anymore..?

* * *

On their way to the station, the Iwatobi Swim Club passed one of the Samezuka buses parked by the stadium, empty except for Matsuoka Rin lounging in one of the seats in the back. To escape the others, he unwittingly walked out to the balcony and nearly bumped into his sister, but luckily for him, Kou seemed too preoccupied to look behind herself. Rin managed to sneak away by creeping along the wall above them, then slipping down the next exit, soon leaving the building not to be bothered by anyone else.

He had been sitting in the back of the Samezuka bus staring at its patternless ceiling for over an hour, mulling over Rei’s words in his head. The more he dissected them, the more he felt a shadow hanging over his head, where Toraichi dissolved into dark gray clouds.

A few minutes later, the Samezuka collective started gathering in the parking lot, and though Rin had been ignoring them with all his might, he could hardly turn a blind eye and deaf ear to Nitori knocking repeatedly on the window by his seat on tippy toes, curling his hands to his mouth to shout, _Please come down and have lunch with us, Matsuoka-senpai!_

“Matsuoka-senpai,” said Nitori when Rin stepped off the bus at last and the two of them paced after the others, “shall I tell you about the event now?”

“Huh?” replied Rin, giving him a tired, annoyed look that Aiichiro leniently mistook for the remnants of post-event fatigue.

“About Ta—aaah, the Iwatobi backstroke swimmer’s one-hundred meter event. Senpai asked me to watch it so I could tell you all about it.”

“Oh, right,” mumbled Rin with darkened looks. “How did it go, then?”

Aiichiro mentally cracked his knuckles and rolled back his sleeves.

“Well, first of all, Ta—aah… um, Senpai? What should I call him?”

“Huh?!”

“Matsuoka-senpai forbid me to tell you his name. What should I call him, then?”

Rin clamped down on his bottom lip before he could say _Speedo Bruises_.

“I could just call him the fourth member of the Iwatobi Swim Club, or the Iwatobi backstroke swimmer, but that might be a little long…”

“Call him whatever you want. Pick a name for him, I don’t care,” replied Rin.

“Let me see then.. hmmm…” mused Nitori in a long string of soft M’s for _Makoto… Mako.. Miko? Mikoto! And Tachibana.. Ta, Taaah… Takahashi? Like the author of that one manga…_

Perfect. Aiichiro was now ready to begin, his brow furrowed in concentration.

“Alright! So, uh, Takahashi Mikoto-san, first of all, he didn’t step into the pool with everyone else. He climbed into it instead, which I thought was a little odd because Senpai never does that,” he began, Rin humming every now and again not to be nagged about not paying attention to him. “And then, when they gave the signal, Takahashi-san was staring upward and missed the signal, so he dived at least a second later than everyone else, and I think he must have made a very powerful dive, because he sank to the bottom of the pool. It took him a long time to come up, and he was almost half way across when he surfaced, and then he started his backstroke. That part was fine, I think, he seemed to know how to do the backstroke, and then he made his turn, and then he started overtaking swimmers! It was incredible, with his late entry, and his difficulties, he managed to overtake Uozumi-kun, and he came in fifth place! I think he hit his head on the wall in the finish. He looked like he was really disoriented, like when you first hit your head and then lose your balance? So then the billboard flashed, and Takahashi-san came in fifth and Uozumi-kun came in sixth, but then they updated the scores and Takahashi-san was disqualified, probably because of the late entry, or because he came up too late, or maybe his finish…”

His own words gave Aiichiro pause. Rin quirked his brow sharply.

“Senpai..?” said Nitori, locking Rin in a serious stare. “I don’t think Takahashi-san is a very good swimmer at all.”

“No joke,” muttered Rin, and hardly knowing why the other’s terrible swimming made him feel worse instead of better ( _What does Haru **see** in this loser..?_ ), he broke into rancid laughter that Nitori just barely reciprocated to make Senpai look less awkward to the two dozen Samezuka students, who turned their heads in shock at Matsuoka’s outburst.


	42. EPISODE 8: Revenge in the Medley! - Part 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> At first Makoto’s thoughts raced from option to possible lunch option as he trusted himself to the others’ guidance down the corridors. After idling uselessly for so long, he now had a purpose, a task to complete, and small though it was, he gave it just as much consideration as though it were of the highest importance. Should he get Haru a station bento? He could have sworn he had seen a stall selling decorative lunch boxes on the way. If he were lucky, he might also come by some mochi to go with, and there were plenty of vending machines in the building if he wanted to include a drink. But suppose Haru preferred something warm, something freshly prepared, what should it be then? Curry? A burger with fries? What did Haru even like beyond mackerel, rice, and pineapple? Makoto had never seen him bring anything other than the first two to school, even though Haru cooked for himself, so he could have made anything he pleased if he wanted variation. Oh, if only Haru had told him what he wanted to eat! Except…

 _Haru told you he didn’t want anything_ , said the voice inside his head. _But you just never listen, do you?_

 _But, Haru **must** be hungry, he needs to eat something to feel better_ , pleaded Makoto.

 _Maybe if you just left Haru alone, he would feel a **lot** better_ , taunted the voice. _But you just **have** to force yourself on others, don’t you? Even when they don’t want you._

By the time they stepped outside, all color drained from Makoto’s face.

 _No wonder Haru didn’t want to come_ , he thought to himself with a bitter frown. _Maybe I do cling to him too much…_

“What’s wrong, Mako-chan?” asked Nagisa, who had been skipping alongside Rei, but turned his head on a whim to check on his friend. Makoto flinched.

“Um, nothing,” he said with a last minute smile. Nagisa grinned and turned back to the others, missing how Makoto’s smile peeled away like an old sticker.

 _And I even told myself I would listen to Haru_ , Makoto scolded himself with a guilty frown, but it was no use. In the effort to do what he thought was best, he unwittingly made a promise of bringing Haru something for lunch, and though Makoto feared upsetting his friend, he shuddered worse at the idea of being found inconstant and thoughtless. He would keep his word, bring some food back, then leave the rest to Haruka. If he rejected the offering, so be it. After all, Haru didn’t ask for anything. Makoto was simply being a busybody, annoying and forceful and selfish like always…

“Well, where do we eat?” asked Coach Sasabe as they approached the station, momentarily dislodging Makoto’s thoughts and dragging him back to reality.

“I think I saw a Freshness Burger around here,” said Nagisa. “I want a burger..!”

“Can we not? Burgers and fries tend to be so greasy, Nagisa-kun,” whined Rei with obvious displeasure, but when Nagisa shrugged him off and started persuading Kou to take his side just to tease Rei, the gears of a decade-old mechanism began to turn inside Makoto.

“Well,” he interrupted with a gentle smile, earning curious looks from the others, “since Rei is the only one who’s placed at an event so far, we should probably let him decide.. as a reward…”

Makoto’s blood curdled, his words trailing off in cold shock as he caught himself doing it _again_ , _this is why everyone calls you Mother Hen, you always stick your nose into everything_ , but when the others’ surprise wore off, Rei’s features smoothed out in a pleasant smile. Nagisa let out a small gasp.

“Ah, good call, Mako-chan!” he said in a humble tone, then flashed them a cheerful grin. “It’s only fair that Rei-chan decides when he’s outdone us all, even Haru-chan!”

“He definitely earned his meal,” laughed Sasabe, slapping a proud hand on Rei’s shoulder that nearly made his knees buckle.

“What shall it be then, Ryuugazaki-kun?” asked Ama-chan with a doting smile. “Since you placed in your event, your lunch shall be my treat!”

“Amakata-sensei..!” breathed Rei with flushed cheeks.

“And I’ll pay for the rest of you,” offered Sasabe at once, unable to resist the gallant gesture and thinking, rightfully, that it might make up for his missing Haruka’s race. Nagisa and Kou gasped wide-eyed, while Rei cupped his chin with a pleased smirk.

“Very well! If you insist, I shall pick the most suitable establishment for a balanced and nutritious meal for everyone!” he replied.

As all of them appeared quite content with this plan, Makoto pressed a hand to his jumping heart and allowed himself a relieved sigh, dreading the day his officiousness would finally backfire.

* * *

Back at the stadium, spectators and athletes alike kept drifting away for a scant hour of rest and a well-deserved meal, but Haru remained on the balcony even as wide open space engulfed him on all sides, rendering him obnoxiously visible in that sea of vacant chairs. His stomach churned with hunger and anguish. How much longer would this take?

_Just stay here and rest, Haru._

_I want to go home, Makoto_ , replied Haru to the echo in his head. He then pushed himself off his seat and slipped out of the row, walking down towards the benches the swim club had originally taken. As he drew closer to the railing, an abandoned program winked at him from a nearby seat, its cover bristled by the wind. Haru reached for it, turning the pages until he found the afternoon events. Makoto’s two-hundred meter backstroke was almost two hours away, then there was Nagisa half an hour after, and another half hour before Rei would get to swim…

 _This will take forever_ , sighed Haru. If only he had something to do instead of dawdling in plain sight for three more hours. If only.. _No._

With the slightest turn of his head, Haru could have glimpsed the pool below, but the mere thought of looking, let alone going down to take a swim shot spikes up his neck and down his shoulders. The water below lay stagnant, a wet yawn in the concrete that breathed stale emptiness into the air of the stadium, and doomed to remain where he was, Haru could not escape it. The stench of dead hope seeped through the cracks of his skull and clung to his skin like sludge, so heavy Haru felt convinced the water would pull him under if he were foolish enough to enter it again.

Was that what Makoto felt each time he had to dive in? Chills, dread, loneliness? Haru reeled and shook his head. A fear of danger implied the water was alive with motion, power, action… and yet loneliness still seemed part of that fear. How did Makoto put it that night on Sukishima? _Water always seemed less terrifying when you were with me._

 _Why, Makoto?_ pleaded Haruka as fatigue clawed into him on all sides, _Why do you need **me** to swim? Isn’t Rei or Nagisa enough? Why do **I** have to stay here?_

 _Because if you’re not there… then it’s no good_ , replied the echo. _It’s meaningless without you, Haru. I don’t want to swim if I can’t swim with you!_

Cold swelled and burst inside Haruka’s chest. Was that how _he_ felt about Rin? Were water and swimming meaningless without him..?

Haru dragged himself back to his seat and sank down with a desolate sigh, his heart ticking like a broken clock as it counted the seconds until Makoto’s event.

* * *

While Haruka sat hunched in his chair, his gaze resting blankly on the ground between his feet, Rei guided everyone else inside a Sizzler salad bar, where Ama-chan and Sasabe lined up at the cashier’s counter to pay in advance for Rei and a party of five. Nagisa, Kou, and Rei immediately turned to the handsomely laden island in the middle, exchanging excited whispers as they each grabbed a tray, but Makoto resisted the temptation. He stayed with his elders so he could take their place at the cashier’s, where he inquired into the possibility of a take-away meal for one. He received a positive answer, then was told he should pay whenever he was ready to compile his order, so not to hold up anyone else, Makoto now joined the rest of the party. They went about the main island in circles to leave no stone unturned, no premade salad, vegetable, fruit, or bread untried. Even Nagisa, who had been craving that exact greasiness Rei detested, was delighted at the wide range of available options, and between bites of crunchy greens and drinks from the machine at the counter, they managed to stuff themselves till they could barely move.

Once Makoto finished his meal, he paid at the front, then took a large styrofoam take-away box from another counter to start on the daunting task of assembling an entire meal for Haru, though he had never cooked anything, or prepared a single bento in his life. His scant knowledge of Haru’s favorites left him painfully indecisive in a place that didn’t even serve rice, until he ended up fidgeting nervously in front of the only certain item on his list, a pyramid of thick pineapple chunks in the fruit section.

“Are you alright, Makoto-san?” asked Rei as Makoto’s shaky hand filled one of the slots of his take-away box with more pineapple than was strictly warranted for a single serving of fruit.

“I uh, I’m trying to put together a lunch for Haru,” replied Makoto in a hushed tone, “but I’ve never done this before.. Rei, do you know what Haru likes to eat?”

“Mackerel, of course!” came the ready reply. Makoto’s brow flattened at once.

“Something that is actually available here, Rei.”

Rei let out a strangled sound.

“Ah, ha ha, you are quite right, Makoto-san, how can you possibly give him mackerel when the menu does not feature any..!” he laughed nervously. Makoto let out an agitated groan.

“I told him I would bring something and I already paid for a meal to go, but I just don’t know what to pick…”

“What’s wrong?” asked Kou behind them. “Shouldn’t we head back to the stadium?”

“Yeah, Mako-chan is going to swim in an hour!” chimed in Nagisa. Makoto swallowed.

“I’m trying to decide what to get for Haru, for lunch,” he said with a sheepish smile.

“Doesn’t he always eat mackerel?” said Kou. Makoto’s brow twitched.

“There’s no mackerel on the menu,” he said in a surprisingly calm tone. “Any other ideas?”

Kou and Nagisa pursed their lips in thought, and after a long moment of consideration, inspiration struck Nagisa.

“Oh, oh, I know!” he cried in excitement, raising his arm for attention. “Why don’t we all pick something to go in the box? We will fill it up in no time!”

“Um, I’m not sure that a choice of random items would make a balanced meal, Nagisa-kun,” muttered Rei, but unable to reject the idea when Nagisa looked at him like a kicked puppy, he paused and added, “But why don’t we break it down into specific food groups for each person? As you can see, Makoto-san has already picked dessert, so you may choose one premade salad, Nagisa-kun, Kou-san can add another to make the meal more filling, and I shall complete it with appropriate condiments!”

“I will get Nanase-kun a drink,” offered Ama-chan, leaving for the machine the moment Rei nodded in gratitude.

“Let’s give him some bread, too. Athletes need their carbs,” joined in Sasabe, and once Makoto gave his approval, he found himself going up and down the island in pursuit of Nagisa, who simply couldn’t make up his mind and eventually packed the largest slot of the take-away box with two kinds of premade salad for variety. Stepping up to the challenge, Kou added two more for four batches of different flavors. They then let Rei claim the box so he could figure out which salad could use a smattering of sauce, a drizzle of olive oil, or some balance of greens instead. Sasabe stuffed a warm slice of pita bread in the last vacant slot while Ama-chan brought back a can of soda, and once it was all put together, handsomely packaged, Makoto could have wept with joy.

“Thank you so much, everyone,” he breathed in relief as he stepped out of the salad bar cradling the plastic-bagged box to his chest. “I’m sure Haru will like it…”

“It’s a meal fit for a king!” said Nagisa with a giggle.

“Yup!” said Kou as she checked her phone, then let out a startled yelp.

“Oh no, we need to hurry back!” she cried, one hand whipping the program open for confirmation, then sticking it in Makoto’s face. “There’s only twenty-three minutes left until Makoto-senpai’s event!”

“That’s right, you need to hurry back, Makoto-san!” panicked Rei, turning to Makoto and extending his arms. “Let me take Haruka-senpai’s lunch, I shall deliver it while you prepare for your event!”

Makoto paused. The logical thing to do would have been to leave everything to Rei so Makoto could sprint back, undress at the assembly area, and do his warm ups for safety’s sake, yet some twinge of stubbornness wired Makoto’s arms to the parcel, forcing him to take a small step back.

“No, thank you Rei,” he said with a polite smile. “I would like to do this myself, since I promised Haru..”

Rei held his arms out for a moment longer, then let them fall to his sides, any urge to argue fading away at the silent plea in Makoto’s eyes.

“Very well,” he nodded with a tense smile, “then I shall be waiting for you at the assembly area, so please hurry!”

Rei then broke into a light jog with everyone else, while Makoto did his best to power walk after them, careful not to spill or jumble the contents of the lunch box they had taken almost an hour to compose.

* * *

Those who chose to run back soon gained considerably on Makoto, but the moment Nagisa entered the building with the others, he separated from them to wait for Makoto. His quest seemed like the perfect opportunity for Nagisa to put his newfound knowledge of the stadium’s winding paths to good use, so he told Makoto of his plan, then guided his friend up to Haruka’s part of the balcony.

Within a few minutes, he managed to lead Makoto to the right exit upstairs. Just beyond the door, the two of them could make out Haruka’s thin silhouette at the end of a nearby row, shoulders hunched and head hanging alarmingly low.

“Aaahh, I shouldn’t have run with a full stomach,” whined Nagisa with his hand over his belly, but when his words caused Makoto to stop, Nagisa flashed him a huffy grin and waved his hand dismissively. “I’ll be fine.. go on.. Mako-chan..!”

Makoto nodded, reaching for the door, then pausing at the last second.

“Thank you, Nagisa,” he said with a grateful smile, and a moment later, he pushed the door open and stepped out onto the balcony, accosted at once by a burst of sunshine that left him squinting in search of Haru. Makoto had almost forgotten how the two-hundred meter free events were scheduled right after lunch time, and now stood amazed at the densely packed rows of the balcony, a hundred voices booming as the crowd cheered for the swimmers below. The door closed behind Makoto with a click, a small sound in the pandemonium, yet Haru turned his head in a nervous reflex. The moment he spotted Makoto, he whipped his head forward, shrinking into his seat like he was trying to disappear. He fixed his eyes on the ground as Makoto approached with careful steps. Haru’s hands slipped from his lap and onto the edges of his seat.

Makoto stopped beside him. Haru pursed his lips.

“Here, Haru,” came Makoto’s voice from above, falling low and soft as he bent down and gingerly placed his cargo onto Haruka’s lap. He straightened, then drew a sharp breath. “I…”

Haru lifted his head just enough to risk a glance at him. Makoto looked pale despite the flush of his cheeks, his eyes as dark as the circles underneath them.

“I’m sorry about earlier, Haru. I promise I won’t bother you anymore,” said Makoto in a thick tone, and before Haru could so much as open his mouth, Makoto broke away from him and hurried to the exit, letting the door slam behind him as he ran down the hallway to meet Rei for his warm-up exercises.

“Makoto..!” was all that escaped from Haru’s lips before they pinched closed over the words that died in his throat.

_You don’t bother me…_

* * *

Once Rei finished conducting Makoto’s warm-up exercises, he walked his friend to the pool area, where Makoto lined up with the other backstroke swimmers, not once looking up to the balcony for Haru or the others as they proceeded to the starting blocks. He kept his head forward, telling himself he need not trouble Haru any longer by conspicuously seeking his presence or support, unaware that Haru’s eyes were now seeking his, to no avail. He hadn’t even touched his lunch yet.

On the signal, Makoto climbed into the pool again, but when he emerged, he faced the block just as he ought, then dived with better form than before. With one powerful kick, he broke to the surface earlier than anyone else. Spurred by his flawless start, he began milling his arms frantically to keep his lead.

“He’s fast!” breathed Nagisa as Makoto tore ahead with greater speed than anyone around him, but Rei creased his brow in alarm.

“That’s because he’s not pacing himself, Nagisa-kun! If he exerts himself too early, he won’t have enough strength left to make a final spurt!”

“We even told him to watch out for that,” muttered Kou, her tone disappointed. Nagisa cracked a small smile.

“Mako-chan is scared of the water though, remember?” he said gently. “If I was scared like he is, I wouldn’t be able to pace myself either.”

Rei colored and Kou pursed her lips, still getting used to the idea that they managed to recruit the most unlikely person to join a high school swim club.

“True…” mumbled Rei with a guilty frown. “I suppose the one-hundred meter would be the best choice for him in the future. It’s very unfortunate that Haruka-senpai’s absence took such a toll on his first event..”

“Too late to worry about that,” said Nagisa, turning to Coach Sasabe for support. “Let’s just cheer for Mako-chan!”

“Swim, swim, swim, swim, swim, Makoto!” roared Sasabe into the megaphone. _Swim, swim, swim, swim, swim, Makoto!_ cried the others at the top of their lungs, while Haru sat in silence with the plastic bag in his lap, hands clutching the edges of his seat in hopes of a miracle, some tangible change in Makoto’s performance that said, _It’s because you’re here with me, Haru._

Unfortunately for him and Makoto, Rei’s words proved prophetic. After making a furious start and managing to maintain his lead for two lengths, Makoto started lagging during the third lap as his energy ran out. By his last turn, he had been overtaken by several swimmers, and was visibly struggling to keep up. Each breath seemed too short, each turn of his arms burned. Far above his head, the others could feel his desperation with every stroke.

Exhausted, Makoto bumped against the wall with less force than before. A moment later, the billboard lit up, this time with permanent results.

_5 – Tachibana Makoto_

“ _GOOD JOB!_ ” cried the swim club, loud enough to compete with the Samezuka quadrant.

Makoto finally lifted his head, but Haru once again found the other wasn’t facing him. Makoto was looking at the billboard, where his name blinked in the middle of the list. Haru waited. Makoto shook his head slightly at the display, stole a single glance at Haruka, then climbed out of the pool in a hurry to run towards the exit nearest to the others. Haru held his breath, his heart jumping in wait.

Makoto emerged through the exit further to Haruka’s left, and though Haru managed to catch a split-second look in his direction, Makoto was ambushed a moment later by the others, then ushered to the benches with Kou, Rei, and Nagisa hanging off him in bunches. Makoto neither saw nor heard from everyone shouting their congratulations in his ears. Only Nagisa, who was clinging to Makoto’s left shoulder, saw how Haruka lowered his head, gathered the plastic bag to his chest, then climbed to a higher row, until nothing but his lower legs remained visible as he sat down in the cover of the wall by the exit.

Hidden from everyone, Haru finally coaxed the plastic bag open, setting the can of soda beside himself, then reaching for the box. Despite Makoto’s valiant efforts, some of the contents leaked into neighboring slots, but without thinking, Haru dug out a pineapple chunk with shaking fingers, stuffing it into his mouth with yearning urgency. It was followed by another, then another, the void inside him screeching to be filled.

He ate everything within ten minutes, down to the last crumbs of pita bread and the smallest shred of lettuce, but no fullness or satisfaction followed. Haru curled his hands around the soda can, clutching it close as he waited for Nagisa, then watched him swim the two-hundred meter breaststroke. The moment _Hazuki Nagisa_ was marked up for second place, still behind Kirishima Ikuya, Haru cracked the can open and downed it in a dozen small and hurried gulps, still holding the empty can when Rei dived in and won his race, setting a new personal best in the two-hundred meter butterfly, and qualifying for regionals again.

Rei soon joined his friends on the balcony, to be greeted with louder and more fervent praise than before. No one even looked in Haru’s direction anymore, so while everyone was roaring in joy and paid no attention to him, Haru set the empty can down, then slipped away unseen. After all, no one needed him anymore, not even Makoto…

Haru ran all the way to the station, jumping on the first train back to Iwatobi. He tucked himself into a corner for the rest of the ride, eyes bleak and his mind perfectly blank.

* * *

Everyone else stayed until the closing ceremony, partly out of respect for their fellow swimmers, but more in the hopes of Rei’s performance in butterfly receiving special mention or a reward from the organizers. While they waited, they politely cheered for Nitori Aiichiro when they discovered his name under the four-hundred meter freestyle event, never noticing how Rin had joined the Samezuka benches in silent support of his kouhai.

No one realized that Haru had disappeared until the very end, when Makoto finally steeled himself and walked over to Haru’s side of the balcony, only to find an empty lunch box and a crinkled soda can. The box looked eerily clean, and Makoto shivered despite himself when he stuffed it into the nearest trashcan on their way down to the parking lot.

“Once again, excellent work, everyone,” said Ama-chan-sensei as they approached her car, Sasabe having excused himself to go and find his own ride home. “I will be sure to tell the principal and the school board of Ryuugazaki-kun’s achievements on Monday.”

“I’m still sad I won’t get to attend with Rei-chan,” moaned Nagisa, but he perked up as he added, “but there’s still a sense of accomplishment in having tried, right?”

“Yeah…” said Makoto with a small, tired smile, unsure how he was supposed to feel after showing over twenty schools just how much he _didn’t_ belong in a pool, let alone a swim club that managed to place in the top three for all their events. In the end, they walked away with three laminated certificates altogether, one for attendance, and two made out for Ryuugazaki Rei, for his performance in the one-hundred and two-hundred meter butterfly.

“I guess I shall be training for regionals starting next week,” said Rei with his hands on his hips. “I’m getting all fired up! Kou-san,” he continued, turning to their manager, “shall I use the current regimen or will you be making a new one?”

“I’ll definitely make a new one!” replied Kou without hesitation. “Rei-kun must train harder than ever before, and now that I’ve seen everyone swim, I will make suggestions on what to improve for the next tournament!”

“Sounds good!” replied Nagisa with a grin.

“Speaking of everyone, where’s Nanase-kun?” asked Ama-chan. Her students flinched, then exchanged guilty glances. Makoto hung his head.

“It looks like he left without us,” said Nagisa with a light laugh and a shrug of his shoulders.

“Really?”

“Yeah.. he wasn’t feeling well,” said Makoto in a low tone, his eyes boring into the ground.

“Oh… I guess that can’t be helped, then,” replied Ama-chan, turning to Kou as her trusty right hand. “Matsuoka-san, can you take it from here?”

“Yes,” nodded Kou. Ama-chan relaxed into a smile.

“Well, I’ll be leaving now,” she told them cheerfully, she and her tiny pink car soon pulling out of the parking lot to the parting waves of her envious students. A moment later, Sasabe pulled up to them on his _Pizza Boy_ delivery scooter to say his goodbyes.

“Today really got my blood pumping,” he said with a grin. “Nice job! And congratulations, Rei!” he added, giving Rei a honking salute before driving off into the sunset. “See you!”

“He came here on a company vehicle?” muttered Rei with a squint as they stared after him.

“Is his work gonna be okay with this?” wondered Makoto, but since no one could answer their questions, they simply stood and waved, until Coach Sasabe and his exploited delivery scooter disappeared at the next turn with a final honk of farewell. Silence fell upon the parking lot. Another day ended, just like that.

“Well, prefecturals are over,” sighed Nagisa as he clasped his hands behind his back. “I’m glad at least Rei-chan can attend regionals,” he added as he winked at Rei, but the other’s expression turned bittersweet at Nagisa’s praise.

“I wish we could _all_ attend,” said Rei, looking from Nagisa to Makoto. “After everyone had practiced so hard, I wish your efforts could have been properly rewarded.”

As his eyes fell on Makoto, Rei tensed and dropped his gaze to the ground, unable to shake the feeling that Makoto’s first tournament was nothing short of stressful and unpleasant, instead of the inspiring event Rei hoped it would be. He carefully lifted his eyes, just enough to meet the other’s.

“Makoto-san.. your first tournament has officially concluded. How do you feel..?”

His tone seemed worried and kind, coaxing a small, tired smile out of Makoto.

“I… I suppose I’m glad,” he replied. “I never thought I would ever swim at a tournament, and now I have, even if I did it very badly,” he concluded with a laugh. “I almost wish I could get a second chance, so I could do better and make everyone proud…”

Kou tensed and looked away, but the others exchanged warm smiles. Nagisa gave Makoto a friendly pat on his shoulder.

“Well, prefecturals are over now, Mako-chan,” he said soothingly. “You’ll just have to wait until next year.”

Makoto nodded in cheerful resignation, but Kou’s face hardened as she lifted her head, then finally turned back to the others.

“No. You _do_ have a second chance, Makoto-senpai,” she said in a firm tone, earning shocked looks from the boys.

“Huh? What do you mean?”

“There’s still the second day of the tournament tomorrow!” replied Kou with a fierce look. Nagisa blinked.

“But the events we entered were all today.”

“Let’s see here,” said Rei, fishing out the program from his duffel bag for a sneak peek at tomorrow’s events. “The second day is the individual medleys and the medley relays..”

He choked on his words and slammed the program shut.

“Kou-san, _are you telling us—_ ”

“ _I’m sorry, everyone!_ ” cried Kou as she threw herself in front of the others, clapping her hands together and bowing her head with flushed cheeks. “I signed you up for the medley relay in secret!”

“ _Eeeh?!_ ” cried the others in unison. Kou colored worse.

“I talked to Ama-chan-sensei about the medley relay, and she said I should just go ahead and sign you up, since the attendance fee would cover everything anyway…” she explained in a thick tone. Nagisa’s eyes widened in realization.

“So wait, if we win the relay..!” he began to say, hardly daring to continue. Kou finally looked up, her hands balling into determined fists as she nodded.

“Then you can all go to regionals together!”

“Now wait a minute, Kou-san!” cried Rei exasperated. “This is too sudden! The medley relay is tomorrow and none of us practiced for it at all!”

“Why didn’t you say something sooner?” pleaded Nagisa. Kou lowered her head again.

“Because it sounded like Haruka-senpai didn’t want to be in a relay,” she owed with a sigh. Rei’s brow creased.

“After today, I don’t suppose he would want to swim at all,” he said in a dull tone. Nagisa hung his head, but Makoto set his jaw in defiance. Haru probably didn’t want to swim with them. It certainly seemed that way after all that happened today… but to give up so easily on the relay was to give up on Haru, and Makoto could not bear it. Not today. Not until he was absolutely sure that all hope was truly lost.

“Let’s do it anyway,” he said out loud, his tone hard. The others stared at him dumbstruck.

“Mako-chan?!” cried Nagisa. Makoto furrowed his brow.

“When I said I wanted a second chance, I meant it, and Kou-chan has just offered us a chance to swim again,” said Makoto in a passionate tone. “I know we haven’t practiced for the relay, and I might just end up holding you back because I’m not a good enough swimmer, but I still think it’s worth a try, so let’s ask Haru if he’ll swim with us!”

“Makoto-san..!” breathed Rei, his face lighting up in a triumphant grin. “Of course! We’ll ask right away! Shall I call him?”

“Let’s catch our train first,” replied Makoto. “You can call him on the train to let him know we’re coming. Hopefully he’ll be feeling better by the time we get to his house.”

Once the others nodded in agreement, the four of them sprinted off towards the station, praying fervently that Haru did the sensible thing, and went straight home.

* * *

The moment they got on board and secured four seats, Rei dialed Haruka’s number, but after an eternity of monotonous ringing, an equally monotonous voice on the other end told him the number could not be reached. Rei ended the call, then composed a text message, asking Haruka-senpai to call him back as soon as possible.

They received no calls, not even by the time they left Iwatobi station to hurry up the hill to Haruka’s house, where they were greeted by dark windows and a locked front door. Nagisa rang the doorbell ten times. No one answered.

“He must not be home yet… he may have gone somewhere else,” said Rei.

“Call him again! You know he only answers when you start ringing his phone,” urged Nagisa.

Rei took out his phone and dialed Haruka again, letting it ring until the generic voice interrupted him once more. He lowered his phone and shook his head. Nagisa gritted his teeth, stepping backwards as he lifted his hands to his mouth.

“This isn’t _funny,_ Haru-chan!” he shouted at the windows, throwing his hands down as he looked around for another entrance. When he spotted the living room doors, he made a dash for them across the grass, but a few yanks of the handles confirmed they were locked as well.

“There has to be a way in!” Nagisa growled in growing impatience. “Come on, we’ll look in the back!” he cried, then tore past Rei in a flash, disappearing around the corner.

“Nagisa-kun, wait!” shouted Rei as he and the others chased after Nagisa, skidding to a halt when they spotted him on a flight of wooden stairs in the back, climbing towards a door that seemed to lead to the second floor. Nagisa was tugging at it in earnest by the time Rei and the others reached him, but it was no use. In its prime, the upstairs door had been Haruka’s escape route from family gatherings, but after his parents moved out, the door lost all its meaning, just as Haruka had lost his will to escape the chokehold of his empty house.

“Nagisa-kun, this is going too far!” cried Rei.

“It’s not opening,” whined Nagisa, but his eyes widened with a dangerous glint the moment they fell on Makoto. “Mako-chan..!”

“Huh?” blinked Makoto as Nagisa’s hands slapped on his arms and squeezed his biceps.

“Mako-chan, you are our only hope!”

“Eeh?!”

“What if Haru-chan fell down the stairs, and his phone is out of reach so he can’t call us or let us in?” replied Nagisa, his eyes flashing fiercely at the thought. “We have to get inside to make sure he’s alright, so use your idiotic strength to break down the door!”

“ _I can’t just break down Haru’s door!_ ” cried Makoto bewildered. “AND _EVERYONE STOP SAYING IDIOTIC STRENGTH ALREADY!!_ ”

“Breaking and entering is also highly illegal, Nagisa-kun!!” shrieked Rei behind Makoto’s back. Nagisa puffed his cheeks at their betrayal.

“Guess we’re stuck out here while Haru-chan might be out cold at the bottom of the stairs,” he muttered with dark looks. Makoto paled, his hands finding each other to wring his fingers anxiously. Kou huffed and stomped her foot.

“ _Will you stop talking like that!_ ” she snapped at Nagisa, whose hands shot up in surrender. “Seriously… Let’s just go back to the front of the house and wait for Haruka-senpai there. He’s bound to come home soon, right?”

The others shrugged at her in growing uncertainly, but for lack of better suggestions, they left the stairs one by one for the terrace up front, sitting down in a row with their backs thrown against the living room doors.

* * *

An hour passed in tense wait, during which the once vibrant sunset flushed into darker blues, but there were no calls, no messages, and no sign of Haruka. Slowly but surely, the four of them budged closer to each other, nestling shoulder to shoulder to keep warm in the cooling air. Kou lifted her hand to check her watch.

“It’s after eight and he’s still not home…” she said in a small voice.

“Where did he go?” wondered Nagisa, whose anxiety eventually drowned out his wild theories of Haru struggling to get to the phone inside. Rei paled.

“What if…” he began to say, his voice trailing off into wretched silence. Nagisa flinched. He slammed his fists down on the terrace floor.

“Oi, Rei-chan, don’t say things like that with that look on your face!”

“Says the person who kept theorizing about Haruka-senpai falling down the stairs!” snapped Rei right back. “I didn’t even say anything yet! But, what if…”

Their eyes fell on the ground, Makoto’s heart pounding fiercely in his chest. If Rei implied what Makoto thought he did… _no, oh god, please no,_ surely Haru wouldn’t do that, not if he had already experienced this before and lived, but after today… _what if…_

 _I should have paid more attention to him_ , he told himself in bitter resentment. _What kind of friend am I..?_

“Let’s try and call him one more time,” pleaded Nagisa. Rei fished out his phone again, dialing the number without even looking. He then put the device on speaker as the others scooted around him in a circle.

“ _The number you dialed cannot be reached. Please try again later. Beep. You have reached the voice mailbox. Please leave your name and a message after the tone._ ”

“We’ll leave a message, then,” said Nagisa, taking a deep breath as he waited for the tone.

 _Beep._ “Haru-chan? Where are you right now?”

“Please come home, Haru, we’re all worried about you,” joined in Makoto.

“I’m sorry, Haruka-senpai!” blurted Kou, just as anxiously as her earlier confession had been. “I signed everybody up for the medley relay tomorrow!”

“So let’s swim together again, Haruka-senpai!” said Rei. “All of us want to swim with you, including Makoto-san, who told us that—”

Another beep cut him off. “ _Your message has ended._ ”

“Will Haruka-senpai really come home when he gets that sloppy message?” mumbled Kou.

“It’ll be okay!” replied Nagisa with a smile. “I’m sure our message has what it takes to touch Haru-chan deep down! Now we just have to wait!”

Unable to do anything else, the others nodded in silence.

* * *

And so they waited…

…and waited…

……and waited, but no amount of calls or messages seemed to work. When Makoto checked his watch next, it was close to nine in the evening. The others beside him sat shivering and their stomachs growling in hunger, but Makoto was almost certain that if he let them, they would stay and wait uselessly when they should be at home resting. Kou looked like she was falling asleep. Nagisa had already nodded off on Rei’s shoulder once or twice…

Makoto sighed. There was only one thing to do, and just this once, it was something he was good at.

“It’s getting late, everyone,” he began in a soft, gentle tone, straightening to make use of his stature in front of his smaller peers. “We should all head home.”

“But..” Kou tried to argue, only to be met with a soothing smile.

“If you stay too long, you will miss your trains home. I’m sure your families are worried by now,” replied Makoto. Rei and Nagisa exchanged spooked glances, the thought having never entered their heads until Makoto mentioned it. “So, Nagisa. Rei.”

The boys turned to Makoto with tense expressions, all the more so for how serious Makoto’s face had become.

“Please escort Kou-chan to her train, and make sure she gets on board safely before you go home.”

“Makoto-senpai…” mumbled Kou with flushed cheeks. Makoto cocked his head.

“It’s best to stay together and look out for each other,” he said as his gaze travelled from Kou to the others, his brow creasing slightly as he added, “And please.. send me a message when you get home.”

Nagisa and Rei looked to each other, then nodded solemnly, glad to have something to do at last.

“Understood, Makoto-san,” said Rei with a small bow of his head. “We will escort Kou-san to her train together, and then I shall walk Nagisa-kun home myself.”

“Thank you, Rei,” said Makoto, rising up from the terrace. He stretched out his impressive height, glancing to the others gathering behind him. “Come now. I’ll see you all to the gate.”

And so the four of them left Haruka’s terrace, shooting disappointed glances at the blackened windows as they descended the stone stairs towards the Tachibanas’ house, where Makoto once again reminded them to stick together, then kindly insisted Kou put on her jacket to keep warm. After saying their hushed goodbyes, Makoto waved to them from the steps to his gate until they disappeared down the path, shoulders sunk and heads hanging in defeat.

Silence fell upon the hill like a drape of heavy snow. Makoto sighed, glanced up at his own home, then slowly turned back towards Haruka’s empty house one last time.


	43. EPISODE 8: Revenge in the Medley! - Part 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When Haru got off the train at Iwatobi station, his feet first carried him down the usual path towards the bay, where the setting sun now dipped into the water, melting into ribbons of red and gold across the waves. Haru stopped after a few drowsy steps to stare at the colors, his hands clenching and unclenching by his sides. Down by the shore, he could make out the silhouettes of adults wading in the water, while children screeched in delight among the ruins of sloppily built sand castles. One little girl was crouching right where the waves met the sand, digging her small hands into the wet ground, then holding out a newfound seashell or smooth pebble, waiting patiently for the ocean to come lick it clean.

Something stirred inside Haruka like the heads of withered flowers in the wind. He still had his swimsuit on and nowhere else to go. All he’d have to do is take off his clothes, throw down his duffel bag, and he could be just another bather down at Iwatobi Bay.

His hands tightened in agitation. Even if he had the confidence to intrude upon the idyllic scene before him, would the ocean feel different from the pool of the stadium? Would Haru feel any lightness of body, or ease of spirit in the tender embrace of the waves, or would he find to his horror that defeat had turned him into some grotesque caricature of King Midas, whose very touch turned water into tar?

Would the families stare at his pain? Would they be able to tell that something slowly rotted inside Haru’s chest, tainting the only thing he held pure and sacred?

He spun around as though he had been caught in some ghoulish act, then broke into a run, back to the house and the confinement of the bathtub… but no. Some meters later, Haru skidded to a halt, eyes widening in realization. There was one more, one _last_ place in Iwatobi with plenty of water, but no one around to judge him – the swim club’s pool at Iwatobi High.

Even so, Haru felt unable to rush his reunion with the water. His regular pace simmered to a crawl down the path and towards the school grounds, making sport of controlling the length and spring of his steps, until he forced himself into a slow, crumbling rhythm. There was no need to hurry, he told himself. No family waited for him at the house, and his teammates neither needed nor wanted him anymore, not even Makoto.

* * *

Haru soon walked past the school gate, then around the buildings to the pool, dragging his feet on the concrete with every step. Just as he had hoped, there wasn’t a soul around, no one to witness how in the presence of water, Haruka now struggled to shed his jacket and tug off his trousers, as if he were undressing for the first time in his life. In the end, he left his clothes scattered by the poolside, just as they had fallen to the ground, his duffel bag and the phone buried on its bottom completely forgotten.

Haru stepped onto one of the starting blocks in the middle, heart drumming and feet rooted to the edge of the block. For one moment, he fancied himself Tachibana Makoto, second year, Scorpio, age sixteen, standing tall in his Samezuka speedo just seconds away from shattering below. The water glossed deep crimson in the sunset, its bottom dark and unfathomable in the dimming light. Haruka imagined himself sinking deeper and deeper in it, until he pushed through the membrane of another universe.

His heartbeat softened to a steady hum. There was nothing frightening about the water and its mysterious depths, not to him. To dive in and find himself disenchanted and detached, _that_ would have been a fate worse than drowning.

Haru took a bow and leaped off the block, entering the water just as effortlessly as he had done before, and before, _and before_ , closing his eyes in relief as the lukewarm waves caressed his clammy skin. He felt no trace of sorrow or corruption within. The pool cradled him like a mother embracing her wayward child, so Haru remained in its tender hold, gliding up and down and from lane to lane until the warm tones of the setting sun gave way to the cold hues of the evening sky.

Haru hardly felt the passage of time as he lost himself in the water, but when he emerged from the bottom of the pool after a particularly long dive, he planted his feet to stare in surprise at the pale glare of the moon and stars above. He pushed himself away again and his feet paddled softly across the moon-lit surface, eyes on the sky until he sank down in a light tumble. Funny how the hours seemed to fly whenever he surrendered himself to the water, fleeing and hiding from the clutches of reality. Oh, how Rin would despise him if he saw how aimlessly Haruka drifted around, now that his strings had been severed for good…

 _Why don’t I feel glad?_ Haru asked himself, begging the cosmos for an answer.

_What was it I really wanted? What was I trying to do?_

_What was it all for..?_

* * *

Suspended in time and liquid space, Haru felt neither cold nor fatigue. The more he lingered in the pool, the more his skin accustomed to the gradually cooling water around him, so he continued to loop around in figure eights, as if the symbolic motion could make his stay infinite. But as night inevitably fell upon him, the emptiness inside Haruka grew like a disease. Instead of some poetic revelation that his life would go on despite losing Rin, it was ultimately the roar of his stomach that chased Haru out of his sanctuary and under the showers, drawing hot water from the taps not to risk sickness again. His skin was steaming in the cold as he walked into the changing rooms and borrowed some of the towels, rubbing his hair as dry as his patience allowed. He then picked up his clothes and dressed, leaving in a swifter stride than he had arrived.

Hunger now nipped inexorably at his heels, so he told himself he would go home and eat the mackerel his younger morning self had left him in the fridge… and once he ate it, he would finally lay down today in the grave of broken dreams.

He tried for a light jog to keep warm, only slowing down when he reached the bottom of the hill, from whence he climbed towards his house at a casual pace, stopping only in front of the steps to Makoto’s gate. The first floor lights were still on, but the entire second floor seemed dark and silent.

 _He must be asleep by now_ , thought Haruka, hanging his head as he broke into soft, bitter laughter at his friend’s final words to him. _You kept your promise, alright. You win, Makoto._

He sank his hands in his pockets as he turned away from the gate, heading up the stone stairs one tired step at a time. His own house loomed black and somber ahead, with only the promise of cold mackerel to entice Haruka. _Almost there…_

Just as he turned to enter the path leading to his front door, Haru twitched backwards in shock. His heart jumped so fiercely it threatened to leap right out of him. In the corner by the wall, a large figure lay in a heap with their back against the front door, head cradled in the fold of their arms over their knees.

 _It can’t be_ , Haru told himself, hardly daring to breathe as he drew closer, then stopped wide-eyed to stare in disbelief at the apparition that seemed too surreal, too good to be true.

It was Makoto, huddled into a ball on the cold ground in the middle of the night, one of his arms hanging loosely from the arch of his knee. Something small and rectangular rested between his feet, as if it had dropped from his lax fingers when he fell asleep…

Haruka paled. He dug into his duffel bag, scraping around for his phone. When his fingers finally bumped into it, he snatched it up and flipped it open. His skin shrieked with goose bumps at the lock screen.

_4 Missed Calls_

_2 New Messages_

_1 New Voice Message_

His finger hit the buttons, mashing clumsily for answers.

_Missed Call – Rei, 18:21_

_Missed Call – Rei, 19:06_

_Missed Call – Rei, 20:09_

_Missed Call – Makoto, 21:26_

A few more pushes…

_New Message: Rei, 18:22_

_We have just boarded the train to Iwatobi station. We need to talk to you, Haruka-senpai! This is urgent, so please call me back as soon as possible! R. R._

Haruka’s chest grew cold. Urgent..?

_New Message: Makoto, 21:28_

He bit his lip, opted out of the menu, then lifted the phone to his ear.

_1 New Voice Message. Beep._

**_Haru-chan? Where are you right now?_ **

Haru’s heart skipped a beat. _Nagisa..?_

**_Please come home, Haru, we’re all worried about you!_ **

_Makoto..!_

**_I’m sorry, Haruka-senpai! I signed everybody up for the medley relay tomorrow!_ **

_Kou…_

**_So let’s swim together again, Haruka-senpai!_ **

_Rei…_

**_All of us want to swim a relay with you, including Makoto-san, who told us that—_ **

_Beep. End of Message._

Haru lowered his phone, eyes large and expression dazed. They were worried? _Relay..?_ What did Makoto tell them…?

He took a deep breath, fingers trembling over the buttons.

_New Message: Makoto, 21:28_

_Please come home. I’m so sorry. –Makoto_

Haruka’s hand fell to his side, the duffel bag slipping from his shoulder to the ground. It landed with a thud that rang obscenely loud in the dead of night, but Makoto did not so much as stir beyond the rhythmic rise and fall of his chest behind his arms. Haru sank the phone into his pocket, then stood there a moment longer, mesmerized, even afraid of the other’s sleeping form. What was he going to say to Makoto? Was there even anything to say after disappearing for hours while the others worried themselves sick?

Nothing. And yet he still had to try.

“I’m home, Makoto…” he whispered, his voice strained beneath the lump in his throat as he sank to one knee in front of the other. He reached out a shaky hand to take Makoto’s phone from where it had fallen, setting it on top of Makoto’s duffel bag. His fingers shrank in hesitation, then gingerly pressed against the back of Makoto’s hand. His skin felt cold and dry. _He must have been waiting a long time_ , thought Haruka, his face darkening at his own thoughtlessness. He should have known better than to think Makoto wouldn’t worry about him at all, when Makoto now felt like one of the few constants in Haru’s small, unstable world, as steadfast and dependable as no one else had ever been. The more Haru stared at the tired spikes of Makoto’s hair and the dirt on his sneakers, the more wonderful he seemed, large and faithful and blissfully oblivious of Haruka kneeling just inches away, struggling with the hot flutter of his heart.

 _If you catch a cold because of me, I swear…_ thought Haruka as he took an unsure breath and reached out his hand again, placing it on Makoto’s shoulder to give it a gentle nudge.

“Makoto. Makoto…”

The other shivered at his touch, lifting his head just barely to rub at his eyes with a sleepy fist. Haru’s hand curled shyly to his side.

Makoto blinked at him, his vision still drenched in fog. Haru braced himself.

“I’m home,” he said in a thick tone, waiting to be scolded or fussed over for having disappeared off the face of the earth for several hours, but no lectures or harsh words came his way. The moment Makoto recognized him, he gasped, cried out Haru’s name in relief, then tumbled forward on his knees, throwing his arms around Haruka to pull him close. In the effort to embrace him, Makoto pinned Haru’s arms to his sides and squeezed him entirely too hard, oddly reminiscent of his frenzied antics at the Sukishima Rest Howse.

“ _Haru!_ _You’re alive…!_ ” cried Makoto an inch from Haruka’s ear, his fingers sinking into the folds of Haru’s jacket and clenching around them tightly, as if trying to convince himself that all of this was undeniably real. Haru could feel him wring the fabric, until his jacket and shirt bunched up in large swirls over his back.

“I.. can’t.. breathe..” Haru choked against Makoto’s collar, hands knocking lightly against Makoto’s sides until he could feel the other’s arms soften around him, though Makoto by no means let go, nor did he relinquish his hold on Haruka’s clothes. He pulled back just enough to look Haru in the eye, his face flushed in a wobbling grin. Haru furrowed his brow.

“Didn’t I tell you before to be more gentle..?”

“S-Sorry, Haru,” breathed Makoto, his voice crackling. Haru squinted at him.

“And what do you mean, _alive?_ ”

Makoto’s grin lapsed into a grimace.

“I’m sorry… You just really scared us, Haru. After we got back, we waited here for hours, and Rei kept calling you but you just wouldn’t pick up, and when it was getting late and you still weren’t back, we were starting to think… that _you.._ ”

Makoto’s fingers wrenched the folds even harder, eyes dark and wet in the corners. Haruka paled.

“Makoto… I’m not that weak,” he mumbled, turning his head with an uneasy frown. Makoto chuckled, a small, broken laugh that had Haru turn back to him by degrees, until their noses nearly brushed together.

“I’ll try to remember that,” said Makoto, his breath tickling across Haru’s cheeks as his face softened into a feeble smile. Up close, his lips looked almost purple, a mere inch away…

Haru colored crimson as he leaned forward and promptly snagged on his own clothes in Makoto’s hold. Makoto blinked in realization and loosened his grip, his fingers opening little by little until the mangled fabric slithered back over Haru’s skin again. Makoto’s hands brushed over it in a sorry attempt to straighten the folds. He then slipped and pressed one hand against the wall to stand. For a moment, Haru remained on his knees, his head turned in embarrassment at the attempt Makoto didn’t even notice.

Makoto reached out a hand for him. Haru took it blindly, rising to his feet and taking a step back, his cheeks still hot, but his back surprisingly cold in Makoto’s absence.

“Sorry I freaked out and jumped you like that, Haru,” said Makoto in a thick tone, his hands clasped sheepishly together. “You must think I’m awful clingy…”

“Not really,” mumbled Haruka, his eyes falling to the ground. His foot shifted in the dirt. Makoto hesitated.

“Haru… about today…” he said, his tone tentative. Haru looked up at once.

“I’ll swim,” he blurted, cutting off Makoto before he could tell him he was sorry, something Haru never wanted to hear again. “The relay,” he explained. “We swim tomorrow, right?”

Makoto’s jaw dropped in surprise.

“Haru…!” he cried, his cheeks flushed in joy. “Oh, Haru.. I’m gonna text the others right now, they’ll be so happy to hear it!” he gushed, putting his hands down his pockets out of habit, only to find nothing on either side. The confused look on his face made Haru want to laugh, but he bit his tongue in time, and stepped over to Makoto’s duffel bag to pick up his phone.

“You fell asleep and dropped it, dummy,” he said, holding it out for Makoto to take. Makoto’s fingers brushed against his as he claimed his phone. Haru drew back his hand like it had touched a red hot pan.

Makoto flipped his phone open, then composed a group message, his tongue peeking out slightly as he went.

_To: Kou-chan, Nagisa, Rei_

_Subject: RELAY TOMORROW!_

_Haru is back! He’s alright and he said he’s going to swim in the relay! We’ll see you at the stadium tomorrow! –Makoto_

He showed his text to Haruka, who gave him a small, reserved nod. Makoto hit _Send_ with a smile, then retired the phone to his duffel bag, shuddering a little as exhaustion poured down his bones in cold bursts. Now that the mystery of Haruka’s disappearance had reached a happy conclusion, Makoto wanted nothing more than to go to bed at last, and yet to leave Haru alone after all that happened today…

“I… I suppose you must be really tired, Haru,” he said at last, his tone calm, but so reluctant it sent little shivers down Haruka’s spine. Makoto lowered his eyes. Haru bit his lip.

“Do you want tea?” he managed to say, his ears turning red at the daring gesture. Makoto blinked at him surprised.

“Eh? Tea..?”

“You’re cold, right?” pressed Haruka, shoulders tense and his eyes on the ground. “I can make you tea.”

“Oh..” breathed Makoto, lifting a hand to his mouth to smother an awkward cough. “That’s fine, Haru, you don’t have to, I think I’ll just take a hot shower when I get home…”

“I, have a bathroom,” blurted Haruka, his lips twitching a little as his features hardened into his usual poker face. Makoto stared at him like he had grown an extra head.

“Y-Yes, you do, Haru,” he mumbled, his cheeks coloring, “but I don’t think you have any clean clothes my size…”

Haru’s mind jumped to his one pair of stretched jammers at home, and he had to stop himself before he could imagine Makoto trying to squeeze fruitlessly into any of his shirts, shorts, or water forbid, his underwear. His cheeks stiffened. Makoto was now wringing the strap of his duffel bag.

“Besides, it’s really late and we should probably get a good rest before the relay,” he said, unable to look at Haruka.

“I.. have a futon,” replied Haru, his heart beating fiercely beneath the jacket. Makoto slapped a hand to his forehead, raking back his hair with a nervous sweep.

“Yes, I know you do, _Haru,_ I don’t want to sleep on the floor before an important event,” he whined, sounding annoyingly sensible and earning an offended glare from Haruka.

There was a pause, and just as Haru was about to say _Forget it_ , Makoto’s face lit up in a moment of eureka.

“ _I know!_ Why don’t _you_ come over, Haru?” he said next, his tone cautious, but immediately commanding Haru’s attention. “If you’re hungry, my mom always cooks for my family, so there’s bound to be enough dinner for both of us, and then you wouldn’t have to cook for yourself. The twins are probably asleep by now, so you don’t need to worry about them, and then, if you want to take a bath, I can give you spare clothes for the night, and we can lay down a futon for you in my—”

“I don’t want to sleep on the floor before an important event,” said Haruka, his face and tone perfectly deadpan. Makoto’s brow twitched. Haru pursed his lips in defiance. “Do you have a bed?”

“I uh, I have a bed.. in my room,” mumbled Makoto, obviously caught off guard.

“How big is it?” asked Haru, his eyes never leaving the other’s face. Makoto’s ears were starting to scorch in the crossfire.

“Haru, it’s a single bed.. for one person…”

“You can budge up, right?” replied Haruka. Makoto swallowed.

“I uh, I sup—pose I could lie on my side…”

“Let’s go, then,” said Haru, hoping only he could hear the wild hammering of his heart as he turned around and waited for Makoto.

Hardly knowing what just happened, Makoto joined his side to walk his best friend towards his house, unaware that just this once, he and his family won over mackerel.

* * *

They entered through the gate, then passed the goldfish grave adorned with a handful of fresh wildflowers, Haruka bowing his head in respect while Makoto opened the front door as quietly as he could manage.

“I’m home,” he announced himself softly as he entered with Haruka close behind, his voice just loud enough to carry over to the living room.

“Makoto?” replied a voice Haruka had never heard before. He instinctively ducked behind Makoto as a lady appeared in the hallway, hurrying over to them with her brightest smile. “You’re finally home..!”

“Sorry I worried you,” said Makoto, glancing behind his back to find Haruka hiding in his shadow. Makoto let out a soft chuckle, then drew slightly to the side to reveal Haruka, who tensed and closed his legs in a motionless salute. “Mom, I brought a guest. This is Haru.”

Haru lowered his head in wait, suddenly self-conscious about his late and unexpected visit, but the lady of the house flashed him a warm smile.

“Good evening. I’m Makoto’s mother,” she said with a slight cock of her head. _The Tachibana trademark,_ though Haruka. “It’s nice to meet you at last, Haru. Makoto’s told us so much about you.”

“Good evening,” mumbled Haruka, cheeks flushed as he bowed his head to her. “Makoto invited me,” he added, his eyes carefully averted.

“Is it okay if Haru spends the night?” asked Makoto, his brow innocently arched.

“Of course, he’s very welcome,” replied his mother, then seemed to remember herself and stepped back to beckon them inside. “But you two must be so tired. Have you had anything to eat?”

Makoto shook his head, then looked to Haru, who seemed completely engrossed in taking off his shoes and finding a spot for them on the mat. Makoto quirked his brow, but soon joined him, finishing sooner than Haru. His mother stifled a giggle.

“I’ll heat up some dinner for you,” she said, her tone amused. Haru finally looked up.

“Makoto was out in the cold,” he said quietly, hoping she would catch his meaning. She paused.

“Oh? I suppose it does get cold at night, even in summer. Would you two like to take a bath before dinner?” she asked, looking from her son to Haruka. Haru turned his head slightly, but gave a small nod, and a moment later, Makoto nodded as well. “Then why don’t you pick out some clothes for Haru and then go use the bathroom, Makoto? I’ll have everything ready by the time you two are done.”

“Thank you,” replied Makoto with a scratch of his cheek, motioning for Haru to follow him upstairs as quietly as possible. They climbed up on tiptoes not to disturb the twins, and after some more sneaking past their door, Makoto stopped in front of another one, sliding it carefully open not to make too much noise.

“This way, Haru,” he said as he turned on the lights, then stepped aside to let his friend pass. “This is my room. We’ll sleep in here.”

Haruka entered, then stopped to stare, trying to trace some similarity between his and Makoto’s room, and failing miserably. Everything inside seemed larger and more lively than anything of his, from the impressive width of the ‘single bed’ to the large desk in the opposite corner with a family-size bulletin board hung above it, partly hidden from his view by a flat screen TV on top of an eight-drawer cabinet, a dozen gaming consoles scattered around it. Haruka’s television at home seemed roughly the same size, but he owned no consoles, so he started wondering what sort of games Makoto and the twins played, realizing he could not name a single title produced in recent years. His eyes soon drifted to the bed again, spotting a small potted plant by the header, then Makoto’s uniform hanging above it like a wall scroll. His gaze then jumped once more to the bulletin board, which seemed to hold a hundred papers pinned up in endearing chaos.

Behind him, Makoto scratched the back of his head with an awkward smile.

“I um, I’ll get some clothes for you,” he said in a low voice as he walked over to his cabinet, pulling the drawers open to begin his search. He soon lifted out a shirt Haru recognized from their training camp, and his heart did a somersault as Makoto laid it carefully on top of the cabinet for him. He edged around Makoto and stopped in front of his desk, hoping to lose himself in the contents of the bulletin board for a while.

His breath hitched. Right in the middle, pinned carefully around the edges between some colored drawings signed by Ran and Ren, was the motivational poster he had drawn for Makoto ages ago, perfectly intact save for a few creases, where Haru once folded it during class so he could pass it to Makoto as a note. He reached out, one finger carefully tracing the curve of the figure he had modeled after his friend.

“You kept this..?” he asked in an awed tone.

Makoto walked back to him to look, a pile of clean clothes in his hands. He followed Haru’s pointed finger, then turned his head with a grin verging on embarrassed laughter.

“You got so mad at me I thought you would throw it away,” said Haru.

“No..” said Makoto in a tender tone, unable to look at the drawing or Haruka. “Besides Ran and Ren, no one has ever drawn me anything, let alone something this nice, so I kept it…”

Haru bit his lip. Drawn in haste, he could now spot some mistakes in the anatomy, and the origins of the drawing were hardly anything to be proud of. He lowered his head.

“It’s just a drawing,” he said in a thick tone. Makoto chuckled.

“I suppose that’s true for someone who can draw whatever they want,” he replied jovially. “You’re very talented, Haru. I’m not really good at anything. No matter how hard I try, I still can’t draw a thing..!”

“You’re good at other things,” muttered Haru. Makoto looked to him with curiosity, but too shy to ask, he took a deep breath and simply held out the clothes for Haruka to take.

“Here, Haru,” he said, letting his friend claim the t-shirt and a pair of gray shorts. “I hope these are okay. I could give you some underwear too, but it might be too big…” he added, his cheeks pink. Haru turned his head.

“These are fine,” he mumbled, staring at the shirt. Did Makoto sleep in it often?

“Well, you go and take a bath, Haru. I’ll take mine when you’re done,” said Makoto, sitting down on the edge of the bed.

“Alright,” said Haruka. “I’ll hurry up,” he added, then left the room with Makoto’s clothes in his hands, worried for one moment he would not find his way until he saw a sliver of light on the floor, coming from the open door of the family bathroom, where Makoto’s mother left the hot water running, along with a fresh stack of towels for the guest.

* * *

True to his word, Haru did not linger long. Once he felt properly warmed up, he toweled himself dry and put on the clothes Makoto gave him, fastening the cords of the gray shorts as tight as they could go to keep them from leaving his thin hips. He then put on the t-shirt and marveled in the mirror at the sleeves sagging pitifully from his shoulders. Was there really this much of a difference between them? Makoto wasn’t even seventeen yet.

He walked back to Makoto’s room and slipped inside, pulling at the collar of the shirt to cover his shoulder. Makoto colored.

“Sorry they are so big, Haru,” he said instinctively. “I probably have smaller clothes somewhere, I’m just not sure where we put them after I grew out of them…”

“Stop saying sorry,” replied Haruka, his tone a little sharp. “These are fine.”

“Okay. I’m glad,” said Makoto with a smile. Haruka sighed.

“Your bath will get cold,” he said as he walked over, then sank down on the bed just as Makoto had done before. Makoto laughed.

“Alright, alright. I’ll be done soon, Haru.” Haru hummed in reply.

As soon as Makoto left for the bathroom, Haru walked back to the bulletin board to give its contents a closer look. He cracked a small smile at the twins’ drawings, especially how they both signed their work with letters large enough to take up a third of the page, while Haruka’s poster had no personal message for Makoto beyond telling him to respect the water and join the swim club. When did he draw this? It was right after that one week of sickness… maybe on his return to school on Monday? No, no, more like Tuesday. Thankfully, Makoto had a calendar on the desk, so Haru carefully flipped back a few pages, resisting the urge to read his friend’s notes.

Once he found the most plausible date, he picked up a pencil from Makoto’s stationary bin, then leaned over to the poster, trying for greater modesty in size than the twins as he signed it on the bottom.

_To Makoto from Haru, May 7, 2013._

_There._ He even managed to space it towards the middle.

* * *

“Come, Haru,” said Makoto upon poking his head into the room, where he found Haruka sitting in front of the bed, staring at the consoles under the TV. “We’ll eat dinner and then we can finally get some sleep.”

“Sure,” replied Haruka.

The two of them snuck past the twins’ room once more, then down the stairs to the kitchen, where the dinner table had been set for two. Mats, glasses, and utensils glimmered in wait, while Makoto’s mother stood behind the counter, portioning their dinner onto two plates. As Haru neared the table, he stopped and blinked at a small plate on one of the mats, laden with plump chunks of cold mackerel.

“If I had known you were coming, I would have bought fresh mackerel,” said Makoto’s mother when she saw that the guest had discovered his treat. “I’m afraid you will have to make do with canned tonight, Haru,” she added with a smile.

“I like canned,” replied Haruka, flushing at the gesture. “..Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” came the cheerful reply. “Please have as much as you like with your dinner. I hope you like curry. I made green curry and rice today.”

“Green curry?!” breathed Makoto, his face lighting up like a child’s on Christmas day. Haruka looked from him to his mother in curiosity.

“It’s a special day, after all,” she replied, obviously amused at her son’s delight. “I thought you might like to come home to this.”

“Thank you so much!” replied Makoto, beaming so brightly Haru had to turn to suppress his smile. _Green curry, huh?_

“It’s Makoto’s favorite,” explained his mother to Haruka as she brought over two plates with rice and green curry on the side, setting them in front of the boys. “I believe you cook for yourself, Haru?”

“Yeah,” replied Haruka, putting his hands together in thanks.

“Thank you for the meal,” he and Makoto said in unison. A moment later, Haru scooped up a spoonful of curry to taste.

“..It’s good,” he said, eyes shifting as he savored the moment. “I can taste cumin, and… apples? Green apples.”

“Bravo,” laughed Makoto’s mother, her grin softened when Haruka tensed self-consciously at the praise. “I did put in some green apples, and I tend to use more cumin than recipes usually call for. Would you like to have the recipe?”

“Thank you,” nodded Haru as he took another spoonful, savoring it as he had done before.

“I’ll write it down for you and leave it on the counter. You two enjoy your dinner.”

“We will, thank you!” replied Makoto, who was unable to resist and had already made a dent in his own curry and rice. “Enjoy, Haru.”

“You too,” replied Haruka, carefully transferring a chunk of mackerel onto his plate, to see how well it went with green curry.

* * *

While Makoto and Haru ate in silence, Makoto’s mother scribbled down the recipe for Haru, then left to prepare Makoto’s bedroom for the visitor. She eventually reappeared in the kitchen to bid them good night, leaving the boys to put everything away into the dishwasher, then head back upstairs at their leisure.

Back in Makoto’s room, they found the futon he hazarded to mention earlier, set with a pillow and a blanket for Haruka. The two of them exchanged glances. Makoto twiddled his thumbs. Haru narrowed his eyes.

“Are you sure you won’t take the futon, Haru?” Makoto asked with an innocent smile.

Haru gave him a pointed look as he walked over to the futon, gathering the blanket and pillow under his arms. He then flopped down on the edge of Makoto’s bed, staring expectantly until Makoto’s shoulders slumped in defeat. He stepped to the door and turned the lock, then switched off the lights and came crawling into bed, settling down with his back to the wall. Haru curled onto his side to face Makoto, tucking the blanket around himself.

“Good night, Haru,” said Makoto as he pulled his own blanket up to his shoulders.

“Night,” replied Haru, closing his eyes and nudging his cheek against the pillow. The two of them now lay in silence with only a few inches between them, until Makoto coughed in a failed attempt to smother his laughter.

“What’s so funny?” muttered Haruka, one eye opening to squint at him. Makoto coughed again.

“Nothing, Haru.”

“Makoto…”

“I just remembered something that’s kind of embarrassing..”

“ _Makoto._ ”

“Fine, fine. I suppose it’s not _too_ shameful…” said Makoto at last. “You just reminded me that, when I came home from our training camp and got to sleep in my bed again for the first time, I couldn’t go to sleep for hours and just lay here, wondering why I couldn’t sleep. I first thought it was because I had school the next day and exams were coming up, or maybe my head was too full of everything that happened… but after a while, I realized it was just too quiet without you sleeping next to me.”

Haru’s heart gave a leap. Makoto’s laugh trailed off into the night.

“I know… it sounds ridiculous, right?”

Haru’s face hardened, his hand curling roughly around a corner of the blanket.

“ _Sure_ ,” he said, then turned onto his other side and drew his legs upward, curling away from Makoto into a small, miffed croissant. He shifted a little more until his feet dangled off the edge, then pursed his lips, waiting for the ‘breath of courage’ as Haru came to call those short pauses of Makoto bracing himself to speak.

The other inhaled sharply through his nose. Haruka tensed.

“Haru…”

Haru hummed. Makoto shifted slightly behind him.

“Are you cold, Haru..?”

“…Yeah,” sighed Haruka, his features just a little smug as Makoto’s arm reached around him to pull him into a comfortable coze. A moment later, Makoto’s hand found Haru’s beneath the blanket, where he cupped it gently of his own accord to keep it warm.

“Sleep well, Haru,” whispered Makoto.

Haruka hummed again, and though Rin managed to worm himself into his final thoughts, the arm around his chest and Makoto’s soft breathing down the nape of his neck made them bearable until sleep came to whisk Haruka away.

* * *

The next morning, Makoto and Haru were roused from their peaceful slumber by a series of loud bangs as two sets of little fists smacked into Makoto’s door.

“Onii-chan! _Onii-chan!_ ” wailed the twins outside. Makoto panicked.

“ _Coming!_ ” he cried as he tumbled out of bed, then scrambled back to Haruka, who glared at him sleepily from his blanket. His silent warning fell on deaf ears. The next moment, Makoto reached out for him and pulled him off the bed onto the futon, tossing his pillow after him as he hurried over to the door.

Before he could open it, the pillow smacked against his back. Makoto turned back to shoot Haru a glare, then unlocked the door, to be ambushed by four little hands latching onto his shirt with growing eagerness.

“Mom told us Haru-chan was here,” said Ran, she and Ren bouncing on their heels until Makoto moved to let them inside. “Morning, Haru-chan!!”

“Morning,” replied Haruka, sitting on the futon just as Makoto had plopped him there, sorely missing the warmth of the bed and sending Makoto a look to tell him so.

“Mom said to come eat because breakfast is ready,” said Ren. Makoto hummed, then brushed a hand over their bushy heads, doing his best to ignore Haru’s glare.

“Haru and I will be down in a moment, alright?”

“Can’t you come _now?_ ” whined Ran.

“Onii-chan and Haru need to get dressed first,” replied Makoto in a tender tone. Ran turned her head in a miffed pout. Haru felt a vague sense of déjà vu.

“Come on…” said Makoto as he ushered them out the door. “We’ll be down as soon as we’re ready.”

“Can Haru-chan sit next to me?”

“No fair, I want to sit next to Haru-chan!”

“Now, now.. no fighting. Haru will sit next to me so you can both see him, okay?”

“ _Aww..!_ ” whined the twins, but Haru soon heard their pitter-patter down the stairs. Makoto then turned to the cabinet, where he swept up Haru’s clothes to hand them back to him. Haru snatched them from his hands. Makoto sighed.

“Come on, Haru… I’m _sorry_ , alright? I’m sorry…!” he whined, his brow arching pitifully. Haruka sighed. Makoto tried for a smile.

“I’ll make it up to you later, okay? Now _come on_ , we have to get dressed!” he said as he reached for his own clothes. Haru rolled his eyes.

And so he and Makoto undressed, tugging on their tournament gear in Makoto’s room as if it were an age-old routine and Haru were just another Tachibana, hurrying up so he could eat breakfast with the twins. It was a strange feeling, fitting in so comfortably without even trying. _Maybe this is what it’s like to be ordinary_ , thought Haru, his hands going slower and slower at the idea.

“ _Come on_ , Haru, we need to hurry..!” whined Makoto and Haru soon drifted after him, his feet hardly touching the ground.

* * *

Though they had arrived home at a reasonable hour, Kou, Rei, and Nagisa managed to stay up just as late as Haru and Makoto. Having received Makoto’s text, Kou sent it along to Ama-chan with an explanation, then called the boys so they could have a chat conference on their phones, discussing the now confirmed relay with renewed enthusiasm until Nagisa simply fell out of the conversation, which Rei took as his cue to say good night.

The next morning, the three of them met at the station, and an hour later, they were standing in front of the stadium with Ama-chan, waiting patiently for Haru and Makoto to show up and join them.

“Are you sure about this?” Ama-chan asked the boys, her hands tightening on the handle of her parasol. “You haven’t practiced for the relay at all, right?”

“We haven’t, but we shall do our best,” replied Rei as he adjusted his glasses. “This isn’t our first time either, right, Nagisa-kun?”

“Right!” replied Nagisa with a wink.

“It is for Tachibana-kun, though,” remarked Ama-chan. Rei gave her a reassuring smile.

“That is true, but a medley relay requires no more from Makoto-san than to swim just as he would normally swim the one-hundred meter backstroke,” he explained with another push of his glasses. “The true test of a relay team is their well-timed exchanges, and the burden of performing a perfect exchange falls to Nagisa-kun, Haruka-senpai, and myself.”

“If you say so,” replied Ama-chan with a polite smile. Next to her, Kou gasped and raised her arm to wave.

“Look, there they are!” she cried when Haruka and Makoto appeared at the far end of the parking lot, Makoto waving back as they came running towards the group.

“Haru-chan, Mako-chan! Over here!” waved Nagisa with both arms.

“You are late!” Kou scolded them upon their arrival, her features softened in relief. “Jeez… but it’s good to see you again, Haruka-senpai.”

“Welcome back, Haruka-senpai, Makoto-san,” joined in Rei, everyone looking so cheerful it made Haru tense and turn his head.

“Haru-chan…” spoke Nagisa, waiting until Haru turned back to him. “I’m so thrilled we get to swim in a relay again.”

“Let’s do this, Haruka-senpai,” said Rei. “It will be an honor to swim with you again.”

“Nagisa.. Rei…” mumbled Haru, his eyes drifting from the others to Makoto. Makoto gave him his warmest smile.

“It’ll be alright, Haru,” he said quietly. “We’re all here with you.”

“Yeah, so let’s go and do our best!” cried Nagisa, flinging his fist towards the skies.

* * *

Inside, the Samezuka contingent had long assumed its place on the spectators’ balcony to cheer for the individual medleys, but Rin did not join them this time. After a few choice hints from the captain that Matsuoka should show greater camaraderie and support now that his own events were over, Rin reluctantly agreed to watch the relays, but he simply saw no reason to shout himself hoarse with the others, not when every important event had long been completed. Rin’s race was over first thing last morning, Nitori finished seventh in the four-hundred meter freestyle, and the Iwatobi Swim Club had placed all its scant hopes into yesterday’s events. With no opponents to beat or anyone of consequence to watch, Rin found himself brooding on one of the benches inside, wondering why his victory had brought him little more than boredom and disinterest in competition.

Aiichiro, however, found plenty of excitement for himself. Once he was done cheering for a fellow swimmer in the individual medleys, he finally turned the page to look at the medley relay line-ups before Samezuka’s debut in Heat 2… then shrieked so loud he startled his teammates.

_Medley Relay, Heat 1_

  1. _Iwatobi High School – Tachibana Makoto, Hazuki Nagisa, Ryuugazaki Rei, Nanase Haruka_



* * *

“Matsuoka-senpai!” cried Aiichiro as he ran down the corridor in search of Rin. He finally found him by the vending machines downstairs. “Matsuoka-senpai! Come with me! Quickly!”

“What is it?” muttered Rin without even looking. “It’s not time for Samezuka’s relay yet.”

“It’s not that!” replied Aiichiro. “Nanase-san and his club are in the relay!”

All the blood drained from Rin’s face as he turned to Nitori, eyes wide and mouth hanging ajar.

“They signed up for the relay?” he breathed, his voice hollow. Nitori looked down at the program in his hand, then reached it out to him, flinching as Rin tore it from his hands. He stared at the names printed under _Lane 6_ like he had seen a ghost. Three of them should have long been history, and a fourth, an impostor where his own name used to be…

Rin threw down the program and broke past Nitori to find the nearest exit, ignoring the other’s cries of _Wait for me, Matsuoka-senpai!_ He raced down the corridor, then burst through the door to the pool area, hissing as the sun glared him in the eye. Rin whipped up his arm with a sneer to shield his face while his eyes adjusted to the light.

When he could finally unscrew them, his lips parted in shock. The teams had already gathered by their respective starting blocks, so behind Block 6, four figures stood in matching swimsuits: the green cuckoo, Nagisa, Rei, and Haru. Nagisa and Rei were stretching while the others waited in silence, and try as he might, Rin could discern no reluctance about Haruka. His posture seemed relaxed, his eyes resting on the pool in wait. In front of him, the impostor stood tall and muscular, easily the most well-built member of the team…

Nagisa and Rei told him something and the guy nodded. Behind him, Haru looked as calm and collected as ever.

Bile rose up in Rin’s throat, twisting his mouth into a savage growl. A moment later, the first signal went off, and he and Nitori could do nothing but watch in disbelief as Tachibana Makoto stepped into the pool with everyone else, then turned around in the water to position himself, his shoulders pulling together as he waited for the start.

“Ready. _Set._ **_Go!_** ”

There was no hesitation, no last-second desperation this time. With impeccable timing, Makoto launched himself backwards with raw power, managing a smooth entry at last. He broke into a dolphin kick beneath the surface, then emerged before most of his peers, soon pulling ahead in a rough, dynamic stroke that made Nitori’s earlier account sound like slander.

Acid washed at the roof of Rin’s mouth as he watched Tachibana swim, his hands tightening into fists until his nails dug into his palm.

 _You… you as the alpha? Pathetic! How can a talentless loser like you even think you belong in a team!?_ he seethed inside, but neither envy nor hatred could slow the cuckoo down. Makoto soon put an impressive distance between himself and the others, arms whirling as he hurtled towards the wall, and once his hands touched it, Nagisa launched off the block to take his place.

Shivers ran down Rin’s spine, his hands going numb as he watched Nagisa bob up and down in short bursts until he finally reached the turn. _Nagisa’s stroke… It hasn’t changed since then. How he speeds up after the turn, and creates the illusion that his arms extend when he swims…_

Sure enough, the moment he pushed himself away from the wall, Nagisa’s reach seemed to grow with every stroke, until each glide forward brought him further from his peers, and closer to the others by the block.

He touched the wall and Rei leaped forward with effortless grace. His whole torso rose above the surface as he emerged, spreading his wings in a flawless butterfly. Rin’s heart jolted. _And Rei.. where’s that small yellowtail snapper I used to know? He’s bigger and stronger than ever before… A full-fledged yellowtail kingfish!_

Now he could believe what only seemed like glorified rumors yesterday, that Ryuugazaki Rei of Iwatobi High School had placed in both his events, and was going to regionals practically unrivalled by Samezuka Academy. Having long neglected his own butterfly stroke, Rin suddenly felt intimidated by the sheer calculated precision of Rei’s strokes, shoulders tensing until buried deep within, his younger self cried out, _I will take you on any day..! Bring it, Rei!_

Fear boiled into passion for one moment of euphoria, setting Rin’s heart racing until the next moment’s cold realization punched him in the chest, deflating him like a broken balloon. Only emptiness remained as Rei flew past him with rapid speed, completely unaware of Rin, detached from him, outside of him. Rin’s hand twitched upward, then sank to his side heavier than lead. Rei was no longer swimming for him. Nobody was.

As Rin followed Rei, his eyes met Haruka’s by the starting block. Rin’s face darkened in disbelief and anger. Haru’s eyes widened in shock as a million memories rushed right through him, from Rin kneeling by the swimming club pool to Rin saying _never, never again_ … but as Rei pulled ever closer, and he could faintly hear Makoto’s good wishes to his left, Haru could feel his hands grow steady again, until he could reach up and pull his goggles over his eyes without trembling.

 _I don’t need an answer right away,_ he told himself as he adjusted his goggles and curled into place. _For now…_

Rei thrust himself towards the block. Kou and Ama-chan jumped from their seats. Makoto and Nagisa opened their mouths to cheer, and Rin’s jaw fell in a silent scream as Haru braced himself for the last exchange.

_All I have to do… is swim._

Rei’s hands slammed on the wall and Haru leaped off the block, flying into the air as though heaven had given him wings.

 

**_TO BE CONTINUED…_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 


	44. FrFr! - Rei, and Older Brothers!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A short bonus chapter in honor of Rei's birthday (not birthday related, however), which unfortunately fell in the middle of Episode 8, so I'm posting it now. Enjoy!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Saturday, July 13, 2013.**

Secretly, Rei felt grateful to Makoto for kindly but firmly dismissing them for the night. Though he had never supposed himself so easily swayed into idle helplessness, as he and Nagisa fell into pace on either side of Kou, Rei was forced to conclude that he had abandoned all rationality in their desperate wait for Haruka’s return. A responsible vice-captain would have assumed a more active role. He could have initiated a search, for instance, or considered the state and well-being of his teammates, but uncertainty and fear rendered him just as incapable of reason as everyone else – at least until Makoto decided to break their chains by asserting his authority as the eldest. Not the way senior students generally did, but rather like an older brother protective of those younger than himself… _and sometimes_ , thought Rei, _of those older than himself_. Case in point: Nanase Haruka, who to Rei’s knowledge was older than Makoto by four and a half months, or one-hundred and forty days, to be precise.

For his part, Rei gave little credit to Nagisa’s assertions of there being tender feelings between the two, and often dismissed Nagisa as fancying greater attachment on Haruka’s part, and more affinity in Makoto, than their character or relationship warranted. _You have a wild imagination, Nagisa-kun,_ he told him several times in the hope of preventing mischief, and sparing his friends from needless harassment by their hopelessly romantic kouhai, who seemed to suspect love affairs between anyone and everyone, including Kou-san and Captain Mikoshiba, and more bafflingly, Amakata-sensei and Coach Sasabe. Forever a skeptic, Rei could see no more than a professional acquaintance in either case, so he did his best to ignore Nagisa’s match-maker tendencies, and continued to view Makoto’s repeated attempts to include and provide for Haruka as simply being his way: kind, obliging and mindful of others in general. It was just like Makoto to consider Kou’s safety and the anxiety of their families when nobody else did. _He knows his duty to others and takes care of them, just as an older brother should…_

Rei thus did his best to honor Makoto’s benign intervention by fulfilling the promise he made to him at Haruka’s house. After Rei and Nagisa escorted Kou to her train, then waited on the platform until she left the station, they took the last train home and Rei walked Nagisa to his doorstep, glad he could at least be of some use to his friends.

“Well, here we are, Nagisa-kun,” he said as they stopped by the front door. “Shall I text Makoto-san that you have arrived home, or will you do it once you are inside?”

“I’ll do it,” replied Nagisa, his foot scraping against the welcome mat. “But I would rather go and walk Rei-chan home instead. Who’s going to watch out for _you?_ ”

“I shall, Nagisa-kun,” came the ready reply. “Trust me when I say that I am perfectly capable of protecting myself. Now go ahead, your family must be waiting for you.”

“I don’t want to,” mumbled Nagisa, his brow furrowed. Rei arched his brow with a smile.

“You placed third and second in your events, Nagisa-kun. I am certain your parents and sisters cannot wait to hear how well you did! I’m sure they will be proud of you!”

“ _You don’t know them then,_ ” muttered Nagisa under his breath.

“I beg your pardon?”

“Nothing…” sighed Nagisa.

“Well, good night then, Nagisa-kun,” said Rei with a soft smile. He then proceeded to turn away, or at least he would have, had Nagisa not seized his arm to detain him.

“Rei-chan…” he said, drawing his hand back the moment the other stopped. Once his arm was free, Rei turned around to face him.

“Yes, Nagisa-kun?”

Nagisa took a deep breath.

“I gave Rei-chan a reward for placing first. Is there no reward for second and third place?”

Rei blinked, then colored and lifted a heavy hand to his glasses.

“It was a very unexpected reward…” he replied with an indignant huff, but Nagisa stared back at him obviously offended, puffing his cheeks like Rei had just trampled on his heart with the fury of an enraged elephant. Rei wavered under that glare, and after a moment’s hesitation, his eyes darted left to right in search of passersby or spies.

Nobody in sight. Rei’s features softened in relief.

“But, I suppose you deserve a consolation prize for not being able to attend the regional tournament with me.”

Nagisa’s cheeks deflated as air left him in a hopeful gasp. Rei rolled his eyes, but his expression remained perfectly tender as he leaned in, brushing a tuft of hair aside so he could press his lips to Nagisa’s forehead.

“For third place…” he whispered, then dipped lower to place a chaste peck on Nagisa’s cheek right under his eye. “…and second place.” He then straightened and slapped his hands on his hips. “There, I believe this is a fair exchang— Nagisa-kun..?”

Within seconds of receiving his prizes, Nagisa turned the color of a boiled lobster from neck to forehead, his entire body quaking. Rei stared at him in confusion.

“Are you alright, Nagisa-kun..?”

“ _G-Good night, Rei-chan!!_ ” stammered Nagisa and the front door slammed shut in Rei’s face, followed by a flurry of muted footsteps as Nagisa rushed off to his room.

“Honestly, Nagisa-kun…” muttered Rei with a shake of his head, turning away to head home. He took out his phone to text Makoto, just in case Nagisa might forget. The phone lit up and Rei let out a startled yelp. He missed several calls while riding on the train, some from his mother and one from his older brother. Rei’s eyes widened.

 _I’ll call you both soon_ , he thought as he composed a message to Makoto first.

_We escorted Kou-san to her train, and I just walked Nagisa-kun to his front door. I shall text you again as soon as I am home, Makoto-san. R. R._

* * *

Ten minutes later, Rei sent his second message, now from the comfort and safety of his living room.

_To: Tachibana Makoto_

_I arrived safely, Makoto-san. Thank you for your concern. Good night. R. R._

He then dialed his brother first, having not received a call from the elusive university student in some time and wondering, rightfully, if the matter was urgent.

The phone clicked. His brother’s tone sounded frantic.

“Rei?!”

“Good evening, Onii-sama,” replied Rei, his own tone calm and warm.

“Good evening to you too, Alice,” came the half amused, half annoyed reply. “What rabbit hole did you fall into? Mom and dad have been worried sick, you know.”

“Oh?” mumbled Rei, one hand pulling on the collar of his jacket.

“They even called _me_ up hoping I would know where you were.”

“Sorry.. I was going to come home earlier, but we had some unexpected difficulties…”

A pause. “Are you alright, Rei? Where are you?”

Rei’s lips twitched into a smile.

“I’m fine and I’m at the apartment, so please don’t worry about me. This was about Haruka-senpai.”

“Nanase-kun, right? What happened?”

“He lost to Rin-senpai at the one-hundred meter freestyle, and I’m afraid it affected him deeply. He acted very aloof afterwards and eventually disappeared. We went to visit him after the tournament and waited for him to come back, but he didn’t, so once it got very late, we all decided to go home.”

“Damn. Well, at least you’re okay, and I’m sure Nanase-kun will be fine. But come on, Rei, tell me how it went,” came the excited reply. “How did my little brother do, huh?”

Rei instinctively straightened himself and pushed out his chest.

“Guess how I placed, Onii-sama,” he replied, his voice almost a purr.

“Ooohhh, I know that voice. I can almost see that smug look on your face. You got into the top three, right?”

“Go on…” chirped Rei, his cheeks growing stiff from grinning.

“You placed… second?”

 _The careful answer_ , thought Rei as he suppressed his laughter.

“No need to be worried about my feelings, Onii-sama. I placed first! _Twice!_ ”

“ _Woah, oh-hoooo..!_ ” cried his brother on the other end of the line, accentuated by a few booming claps of his hand. Rei suppressed a chuckle at the idea that his brother must have pinched the phone between his cheek and shoulder to free up his hands. “Now _that_ is beautiful. Three cheers for Ryuugazaki Rei, my favorite brother in the world!”

Rei flushed a warm, happy pink.

“But I’m your only brother in the world, Onii-sama.”

“You got me,” replied his brother and a moment later, he and Rei tilted their heads back in synch and guffawed loudly for several seconds.

“But yeah, congratulations, Rei!” his brother continued once they stopped. “Sorry I couldn’t come and watch you swim, this article deadline is killing me right now.”

“Don’t worry about it, Onii-sama,” replied Rei in a sheepish tone. “I know how busy you are with your studies. Maybe you could come and see me at the regional tournament… I’m competing in the one-hundred and two-hundred meter butterfly. Kou-san also signed us up for the medley relay tomorrow, but since Haruka-senpai disappeared, I’m afraid we might have to forfeit.”

“That sucks, Rei. But man, mom and dad will be so happy. Mom will make your favorite for a week straight,” said his brother. “That is, if you call her soon, else you’re just gonna get your ears chewed off.”

“Yes, yes, I’ll call her as soon as we are done,” replied Rei.

“Then I’ll hang up, I still have this article to pad anyway,” offered his brother. “Good night and well done, little brother! You are really something.”

Rei flushed deeper. “Thank you, Onii-sama! I promise I’m going to train hard for regionals, to make you and Mother and Father proud!”

“We’re already proud of you, Rei,” came the quiet reply, but before Rei could get flustered and say something embarrassingly affectionate, his brother hung up with a hurried _Bye bye_. Rei shook his head and wiped his eyes.

 _I love you, Onii-sama,_ he gushed silently as he dialed his mother next, thanking his lucky stars for the kind and caring older brothers of the world.


	45. EPISODE 9: Hesitant Loosen Up! - Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rei had but one glimpse of Haruka’s silhouette as he soared through the air, then carved an opening into the glistening surface of the water a few feet away, submerging with a splash of froth. Above Rei’s head, the others watched like hawks as Haru rose to the surface with a seamless dolphin kick, then broke into the front crawl like a diligent machine.

“Haru!” “Haru-chan!” cried Makoto and Nagisa, leaning over the starting block not to miss a single second of action. Makoto lowered a hand to help Rei out of the pool, but did so instinctively and blindly, his eyes glued to Haruka’s shrinking figure in the distance. Rei took his hand and hoisted himself out, then turned around at once to see for himself what his friends were shouting in strained voices:

_He passed one! He’s in fourth place!_

Rin and Aiichiro were watching from the side, Rin’s heart thumping wildly as Haruka darted past him with lightning speed, to finish what the new alpha had started. The idea repulsed Rin, but try as he might, he could sense no hesitation in Haru’s fluid strokes, or any difference in his determination as he swam for the others, as if this drastic change of replacing Rin with another signified absolutely nothing to him or the others. They simply continued to sail the ship Rin had once forged with his own hands, only to see its bow and wheel ripped apart, and a shoddy replacement tacked on in its place…

Could they not see how wrong this was?

How could they do this to him…?

“He passed another!” cried Rei as Haruka’s turn sent him flying past another swimmer.

“Third!” pointed out Makoto, eyes wide and mouth hanging ajar. Beside him, Nagisa tensed, his cheeks flushed in excitement the likes of which he hadn’t felt in years, as though the heart in his chest were beating with the strength of three others.

“Haru-chan…” he breathed, clenching his fist and throwing it in the air, “ _GOOOO!_ ”

“He passed another! He’s second! _Second!_ ” cheered Kou from the balcony, where she and Ama-chan had abandoned their seats to bounce on their heels with their hands clasped together. The parasol danced over Ama-chan’s shoulder in excitement.

“He’s closing in!” cried Makoto, but by the time the words left his lips, Haruka launched forward to catch up to the Samezuka anchor. Makoto gasped. “They’re _dead even!_ ”

From the blocks, it certainly seemed so, but to Rin, who stood a few meters to the side, the match had already been decided. By the time Haru passed him again, just as detached from him as Nagisa and Rei, he had gained on the other swimmer by an inch, a seemingly insignificant distance that was going to be Samezuka’s downfall. And yet those idiots were still anxious about him, Haruka’s name tearing from their throats as they flailed by the starting block, _Haru!_ _Haru-chan!_ _Haruka-senpai!_

 _Shut up, SHUT UP_ , screamed Rin inside, but their voices only seemed to swell in protest. In a moment, their boom drowned out the stadium completely, until all Rin could hear was Nagisa, Rei, and a voice that sounded nothing like his. Rin’s lips parted, but the air he had swallowed brushed soundlessly past the snapped chords of his throat, doomed to watch in silence as Haru touched the wall and threw his head back.

The board flashed.

_2 – Samezuka Academy_

_1 – Iwatobi High School_

“ _WE WON!_ ” howled the others above Haru’s head. On the balcony, Kou and Ama-chan jumped into each other’s arms.

Indeed, all of them were in raptures, except for Haruka. He still stood heaving in the pool as he pulled off his swimming cap, lifting his head just barely to check the board. Samezuka’s name flashed above Iwatobi, but the reversed ranking said it all. They placed first and qualified for regionals. Should they place at regionals as well, they would go on to nationals, and then – oh, it was dizzying to even think of it. After so many years of wasting away in the bathtub, Haru felt he had managed but a small step in a chain that coiled far beyond his mind’s eye, clawing himself to the surface from the deepest pits of his misery to find himself at the foot of a mountain, a mountain he was now expected to climb in his never-ending struggle to move forward…

At the daunting prospect, adrenaline turned to morphine in Haruka’s veins, until fatigue oozed over him like a downpour of melted wax. He closed his eyes, struggling for breath and wondering faintly when he would get to go home, to crawl into his bed and sleep until even eternity passed way.

“Haru!” came Makoto’s voice from above. Haruka’s eyes flickered open, to see his friend leaning towards him with his hand extended. Makoto’s face beamed so brightly Haru caught himself squinting up at him. “That was _amazing!_ ”

Rei and Nagisa stood on either side of him, cheeks flushed and eyes gleaming as they peered down at Haruka. Nagisa’s hands were balled into triumphant fists, while Rei’s hand rested on his chest, so shaken he had doubled over with his other hand propped against his thigh.

“You did it, Haru-chan!” cheered Nagisa, his voice so piercing it grated on Haruka’s ears.

“Haruka-senpai, that was truly inspiring!” joined in Rei, his hand pressing down to keep his heart from thrashing, but his words merely bounced against Haru’s skin and scattered into meaningless syllables, falling into the pool like drops of water from his hair.

“Yeah, my heart was racing just watching it!” replied Nagisa with a laugh. Haru closed his eyes again, more exhausted with every passing word, _Please stop, I’m so tired—_

“Mine too! Mine’s _still_ racing!” cried Makoto, then burst into relieved, jubilant laughter that threw Haru’s heart into wild somersaults. His eyes widened as they met Makoto’s again. His friend’s hand still hovered in the air, waiting for Haru to take it with never-ending patience, and though Haru’s shoulder sagged with some invisible weight, he slowly reached out his hand towards the other, letting Makoto’s strength carry him out of the water.

Rin could only watch as the guy pulled Haru out of the pool, at which point Nagisa cried _Haru-chan, I love you!_ and jumped Haruka like a child, arms and legs wrapped around him as Rei sealed them into a clumsy hug from the other side. _Haruka-senpai!_ he wailed as he dropped his head on Haru’s shoulder, no doubt to bawl his eyes out in joy, the three of them now huddled together until all Rin could see was three children, just as he remembered them from the relay all those years ago. He could see more than hear Haru complain at Nagisa, but instead of releasing him, Rei and Nagisa squeezed him even tighter, so picture perfect until the impostor stepped into the frame.

Once Tachibana intruded upon the idyllic scene, Rin’s memories began to wither at the edges. His younger self soon faded from the projection of his mind, pushed out by the green cuckoo that casually reached out, then plucked Nagisa off Haru, like he was no larger or heavier than a housecat. Nagisa’s laughter bubbled as he latched onto the guy next, and when Rei followed him to continue bawling on the other’s shoulder, Haruka finally stood unshackled by the starting blocks, his shoulders jumping slightly. Now that he had been untangled, Rin almost expected Haru to turn away, just as he had done back then. However, after a moment’s hesitation, Haruka stepped over to press his head against the guy’s collarbone of his own accord, letting Tachibana’s arms wrap around him without resistance.

Rin froze. The Haru he knew would have never, _he had never…_

The film snapped and Rin’s memories sizzled into nothing. No longer able to trace what he saw, he continued to stare at them blankly, his dry mouth the hollow of a tree rotting from the inside. Aiichiro fidgeted uncomfortably beside him, then lifted a cautious hand to Rin’s back, just barely touching his jacket as though the slightest pressure of his fingers might crack that fragile facade.

“Matsuoka-senpai… we should go back to the others,” Rin heard him say, and though he detested the idea of Samezuka’s company, he turned towards the exit at once, letting Nitori guide him in the hallway where each step now felt like his feet sank into a fog, lost in a corridor that seemed no different than the next.

* * *

Outside, an organizer soon approached the Iwatobi swim team to kindly request they leave the premises, which they consented to with varying degrees of willingness. Rei was still in tears, so he found it rather difficult to release Makoto, let alone properly compose himself. The very moment he was to leave, Nagisa felt the urge to cartwheel around the entire pool in celebration, then pouted that his brilliant idea was thwarted before it even properly materialized in his head. As for Haru, he remained in Makoto’s embrace a moment longer, then pushed himself away with a final nudge of his head against the curve of Makoto’s neck. He lowered his head and averted his eyes to the pool. There was a pause.

“Are you okay, Haru?” Makoto’s voice grazed his ear. Haru’s eyes widened. Something in that voice whisked him away from the pool and threw him back to his school desk in early April, a simpler time in his second-year life when all he had to do was voice his problem, and somehow it would be fixed…

“I’m tired,” he replied at last, lifting his eyes to lock Makoto into a meaningful stare. Makoto’s brow wrinkled. Haru could see the gears turn in his head, then click into place as Makoto’s features smoothed out in a soft smile.

“Got it,” he said with a small cock of his head. Haru’s shoulders slumped in relief.

A moment later, Makoto pressed a tender hand to his back. The tips of his fingers set Haru’s skin tingling.

“This way, Haru.”

Haruka obeyed the light nudge of his hand, and so the two of them followed after Nagisa and Rei, who had since thrown an arm around each other for support on their way to the nearest exit. The team soon climbed a flight of stairs, then stepped out in pairs onto the spectators’ balcony, where Kou and Ama-chan awaited them with wide grins and a flurry of applause.

“You were amazing!” cried Kou, extremely satisfied she was the one who had made the relay possible in the first place.

“Congratulations! You can now advance to regionals together,” said Ama-chan, who then added with a sweet smile, “Since you performed so well, your dessert after lunch shall be my treat.”

Nagisa gasped in anticipation, everyone grinning as they thanked Amakata for her kind offer. Well, almost everyone. Haru merely nodded in acknowledgement of lunch and dessert turning into compulsory events, then left Makoto’s side to sink down onto a chair at the end of the row. His withdrawal from the group drew confused glances. Haru half expected them to harangue him about his lack of enthusiasm or gratitude, his shoulders tense at the thought, but before anyone could raise an objection, Makoto flashed them an apologetic smile and moved over to Haruka himself. He sat down next to his friend in slow motion, then slumped against the back of his seat as though he were about to fall asleep. Makoto closed his eyes, pressed a hand to his mouth, then lowered his jaw to mimic a yawn. The effect was instantaneous. Within seconds of Makoto’s display, Haru could see a spark of realization hit Rei, who fixed his glasses and cleared his throat, even straightening his back to lend himself an air of formality.

“Everyone, please feel free to rest and enjoy yourselves until the ending ceremony,” he said with a small smile, nodding pointedly to Nagisa and Kou before seating himself at a distance, not to disturb the captain or Makoto. “We may leave afterwards, and once we had lunch and dessert, everyone may go home.”

Haru shot them one more glance before closing his eyes, suppressing an impressed whistle at Makoto’s flawless act.

“Okay,” he heard Nagisa a few seats away, his voice lower than before. “I can’t wait! We should get strawberry shortcake for dessert!”

“Wouldn’t ice cream be better?” asked Kou, the three of them soon caught in a moderately heated debate over the perfect celebratory dessert.

Once he could tell they had been conveniently forgotten, Makoto smothered a chuckle and glanced over to Haruka, who opened his eyes slightly.

“I guess we’ll leave soon enough. We should be home by late afternoon, so you just rest until then, Haru,” said Makoto in a warm voice.

Too embarrassed to say _thank you_ , Haru merely hummed in reply, then nestled lightly against Makoto’s shoulder, his head turned not to be scorched by the other’s amused looks.

Some minutes later, Haru’s head rolled over in his sleep and bonked against Makoto’s shoulder. Makoto pretended not to notice, but his smile widened all the same.

* * *

An hour later, the swim club was summoned to the pool area, where the boys received yet another laminated certificate for placing first in the medley relay. With the captain’s silent permission, Rei stepped forward as vice-captain to accept their prize, shaking hands with the organizers, and doing his best to look presentable for the journalists’ flashing cameras.

When the ceremony was over, and everyone proceeded to leave for lunch, Rei offered the certificate to Kou and Ama-chan so they could share the swim team’s joy.

“How nice!” said their advisor, who ended up admiring the pristine gleam of the laminated sheet over Kou’s shoulder, her own hands too busy holding her parasol. “It would look great on the wall of the swim club’s changing room,” she added with an innocent smile, patting herself mentally on the back for resisting the temptation to secure it for her desk at the teachers’ lounge. Kou and Nagisa exchanged glances, then nodded in agreement.

“We should make a Wall of Fame!” said Nagisa, his voice booming with pride. “We have four certificates now, right?”

“That’s right, Nagisa-kun! One for attending the tournament, two that were personally awarded to me, and one for our placement at the medley relay,” replied Rei with a small push of his glasses. Nagisa grinned.

“We can pin them all on our wall! It will look great!”

The next moment, they heard a cough behind their backs.

“Um, well,” began Makoto, at which point Haruka’s pace slackened just enough to fall out of view behind the other’s larger frame, “We can definitely pin up two of those. Rei might want to take his own certificates home, since he won them himself…”

By the time Makoto finished, he had colored fiercely at the thought that he couldn’t resist butting into their conversation yet again. The others stared back at him with curious looks, but Rei composed himself soon enough, flashing Makoto a grateful smile.

“Thank you for your consideration, Makoto-san,” he said, not noticing how Makoto let out a sigh of relief over managing to escape yet another imagined disaster. “You are absolutely right, I _would_ like to take my certificates home to show them to my family.”

He paused and glanced over to Nagisa, who lowered his eyes guiltily. Rei’s features softened.

“ _But!_ Once I have, I shall donate them to our swim club’s Wall of Fame.”

Nagisa perked up instantaneously.

“That’s our generous vice-captain Rei-chan!” he said with a grin, putting a happy flush on Rei’s cheeks that lasted all the way to the Sizzler Salad Bar, where they agreed to ignore the dessert counter so Ama-chan could treat them to ice cream after their meal.

With their advisor’s consent, the swim club soon queued up at the cashier’s, the others looking around eagerly, and Haruka, rather lost.

“This is where we got your lunch yesterday,” explained Makoto in a sheepish tone, turning his head back just enough to carry conversation. “I hope it was okay…”

“It was fine,” replied Haru, his eyes flitting from Makoto to the main island in search of possible options. Makoto followed his gaze, a small smile tugging at his lips.

“They didn’t have mackerel, so I couldn’t get you any,” he added in an apologetic tone. Haruka’s eyes widened. Was Makoto reading his thoughts?

“It was fine,” Haru repeated himself, his tone a little thick. He pursed his lips as he sank a hand into his pocket for his wallet. “Who paid for me? How much do I owe?”

“You don’t owe anyone anything, Haru,” replied Makoto with a soothing smile, but when Haru narrowed his eyes at him, Makoto paused and said, “I paid. Everyone else just helped me put your lunch together.”

“Then I’ll pay for you today,” replied Haruka, stepping out of the line before Makoto could protest, then wedging himself behind Rei, who squirmed forward to give him more room. “Then we’ll be even.”

“You really don’t have to, Haru..” mumbled Makoto, but another hard look had him clamp down on his bottom lip, for fear he might laugh at the childish pout on Haru’s face. “But I suppose that’s fair… thank you,” he added with his brightest smile.

Haruka turned his head with a short hum, and when it was his turn, he paid for two, ignoring the cashier’s curious looks from one flushed boy to the other.

* * *

Faced with an almost overwhelming variety, Haru ended up gravitating towards the same salads and sides Makoto had brought him yesterday. At first, hunting down a jigsaw meal seemed lengthy and tedious, but in the end, lunch passed rather quickly and dessert was finished in the blink of an eye. Haru could hardly perceive the transition from sitting down with everyone by a restaurant table to parting from Ama-chan and taking a window seat on the train, for in either case, Makoto settled down next to him and drew all conversation to himself with unparalleled ease.

Haru’s attention flickered between the view from his window and snippets of talk. Makoto and the others were mostly discussing the relay, with Kou occasionally quizzing them on their weaknesses to adjust their training regimens for regionals, but no matter how many rounds they went, none looped around Haruka to drag him back to earth. Sitting in plain sight as he did, he felt perfectly invisible. Were the others ignoring him, or was it all Makoto’s doing? And did the answer even matter, when he was glad to be spared from idle conversation…?

They soon entered a tunnel, its lights flashing black and sickly yellows before bursting into heavenly pastels in the open air. Haru’s eyes widened in awe at the smudges of pink clouds on the horizon. He let out a shaky breath as he surrendered his thoughts to the sky, perfectly undisturbed by the others.

For a moment, his lips twitched into a small smile.

_Thanks, Makoto._

* * *

Haru continued to sit in perfect reverie until Makoto nudged his arm with a smile, coaxing him out of his seat and onto the platform at Iwatobi Station, where it was time for Rei, Nagisa, and Kou to say their goodbyes, then hurry off to catch their homebound trains.

As for Makoto and Haru, they walked home together, and by the time they reached the bay, Haru’s fatigue simmered into mellow disinterest. His gaze eventually dropped from the sky to drag lazily on the ground, shoulders slack and hands hanging by his thighs. Makoto occasionally ventured some innocent remark, but Haru replied with no more than a nod of his head, or a dull glance to the side.

“We’re almost there, Haru… …I can’t believe prefecturals are over… …School is almost out for this term, too,” carried on Makoto as he continued to weave a loose monologue, just generic enough to fill the void between them. Haru could tell by his calm even tone that no contributions were required to keep Makoto’s words flowing, and so he quietly excused himself from listening… at least until they reached the gate to Makoto’s house.

“Haru..”

Haruka turned his head just slightly. Makoto tried for another smile.

“If you want, you could spend the night again, Haru,” he began, each word tinting Haru’s cheek a deeper shade of sickly pink. “If you’re tired, I’m sure my mom is making dinner so you wouldn’t have to cook, and I would tell my siblings to go easy on you and keep it down, and if you like, we could—”

“That’s fine,” replied Haruka a little too fast, his fists clenching helplessly at what he felt must be utter selfishness. “I would rather be alone and sleep.”

“Oh..”

Makoto looked away as he clasped his hands together, wringing them slightly. Haruka turned his head.

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” he managed to say, risking a shy glance at the other. Makoto paused, but in the end, he nodded, doing his best to look calm and cheerful at the prospect.

“Alright. Then see you tomorrow, Haru,” he said, still turned towards the stone stairs as though he were going to walk him there. Haru tensed. Makoto relented. “Sleep well.”

“You too,” mumbled Haruka, careful not to look at Makoto again as he swept past him, climbing in haste towards his empty house.

He lowered his head with a bitter frown as he ascended. Having given Makoto nothing but trouble for the past two days, Haru would have resented himself for imposing on him any further, but his valiant decision to make himself scarce brought nothing but a vague sense of dissatisfaction. Something still lingered inside Haruka like a sour aftertaste of yesterday, a latent disease of the heart that admitted no company or relief, yet with each sluggish step, he found himself wondering if Makoto could fix that too, if Haruka just let him? Haru didn’t know, and now he was certain he would not find out tonight, though looking back one last time, he could still see the other standing by the gate, watching over Haru until he disappeared out of view.

Their roles soon switched as Haru appeared in the upstairs window, watching Makoto crouch down by the goldfish grave to replace the flowers with ones he had picked from the street before rising up again to enter his house. Haru’s hand curled uselessly against the glass. Somewhere in the bowels of the house, the grandfather clock struck five times.

Haru flinched, then dug a hand into his duffel bag for his phone. He had a missed call from his mother.

* * *

“We won the medley relay,” he told his mother two minutes later, laying in a heap on his bed with the phone cramped between his ear and shoulder. She let out a gasp.

“That’s wonderful, Haruka,” she said in a relieved tone, sounding genuinely happy for once. “Does that mean you will advance to the regional tournament?”

“Yeah.”

“Wonderful! Finally something you can be proud of..!”

Haru pursed his lips at the wording, his fingers sinking into the sheets.

“After all these years…” carried on his mother with a content sigh. “But, wait, Haruka, I thought you said you only entered the hundred-meter. Did you place?”

“No. Rin won,” replied Haru, his breath acrid. There was a pause on the other end.

“Oh… I see,” said his mother in a curt tone, that irksome staple of high-achieving mothers everywhere. “Well, what about your friends?”

“Rei placed twice in butterfly,” Haru informed him in a tired tone.

“Is he the one that always sinks otherwise? _Really,_ Haruka… but what about the Tachibana boy? If you won the relay, does that mean he has gotten better? How did he do?”

A knot formed in the pit of Haru’s stomach.

“He was.. disqualified from the one-hundred meter. But he placed fifth in the two-hundred.”

“Eh? That sounds pretty terrible,” replied his mother in painful honesty. Haru clenched his jaw. “If he really is that bad, then your medley might have been nothing more than a stroke of luck. What a pity… I wish you could have found someone better.”

“He swims fine,” snapped Haruka, just barely keeping his voice down. “He was just anxious. It was his first tournament.”

“Well, I suppose not everyone is born a natural prodigy,” replied his mother in a lenient tone, but if it was an olive branch, Haru had no desire to take it. “But if you can’t find someone else, then you really need to work him harder, Haruka. Please take yourselves seriously, it would really be important to place at regionals, any achievements can only help you in the future—”

“We _will._ ”

“You sound tired. You must have had a long day. I’ll let you rest, okay? Your father says hi.”

“Okay. Bye.”

“Bye, bye. We’ll call you again next Sunday.”

“Yeah.”

Haru pressed _End Call,_ then pried the phone out of the groove of his shoulder, tossing it onto the desk. The knot that appeared in his stomach only continued to tighten with his mother’s every word – _work harder, your future_ – until any desire to eat dinner or prepare for tomorrow’s classes had vanished completely.

Haru sighed. With nothing left that he could will himself to do, he bunched the blanket around himself and screwed his eyes shut, hoping sleep would claim him faster than regret that he chose solitude over Makoto, privacy to deal with the obligatory family phone call over the chatter of the twins, or the hot coil of Makoto’s arm over his chest…

Haru bit his lip as he buried his burning cheeks in the pillow.

 _You’re an idiot_ , he thought to himself. _The last four years have taught you nothing._

* * *

Haru fell asleep ten minutes to six in the evening, spending almost twelve hours in blissful unconsciousness, but his long rest had done little to restore him to his former self. The moment he stirred awake, curled up in his sheets quite alone, the emptiness of his bedroom seemed to echo his own, tugging at thoughts of Rin like a puppy mangling old shoes in the closet. As his eyes trailed across the floor strewn with discarded clothes, Haru could almost see him standing just as he had been by the pool during the relay, Rin’s face dark and distorted in the dim light of his memories. After Rin’s victory, it made little sense for him to care, yet there was something raw about the way his lips split apart like a small, angry wound as they stared at each other.

Why would Rin look at him like that after he had thrown Haru away so decidedly? Did Rin feel betrayed that they tried to imitate his greatest achievement?

 _I’ll show you a sight you’ve never seen before_ , promised Rin before their own relay years ago. In the end, it was the only promise he had kept, and with no other experiences to compare to it, Haru continued to regard that sight as unique to Rin, a spark only he could ignite in their souls… but where did that leave their latest relay, then? In his desperate rush for first place, had Haru seen or felt anything that could surpass even nostalgia?

Suffocating in the tangle of his blanket, Haru couldn’t say. Once that feeling of loss wore off as quickly as it had crept upon him, Haruka felt little more than hunger, and a dull drowsiness that not even his morning bath could wash away. Climbing out of the bathtub, he toweled himself dry slowly and absentmindedly, trapped in a lucid dream that lulled him complacent with its dull, tangible realism.

* * *

Makoto waited for him by the gate, so the two walked to school together, but neither spoke even once on the way. Haru had nothing to say, while Makoto continued to censor himself over and over, drawing thin smiles over the words trapped in his throat.

The moment they reached the gates of Iwatobi High School, they were told by a teacher to head to the backyard for a special announcement. Makoto hardly dared hope it was about the swim club, but he found to his surprise that their advisor left no stone unturned. The moment Ama-chan got home, she called the principal to inform him that not only did Ryuugazaki Rei-kun place twice in his events, but the entire swim club also qualified for the medley relay at regionals. The principal received her news with modest enthusiasm, then sent out instructions to his secretary, so by the beginning of first period, the entire student body gathered in neat columns in front of a makeshift podium in the school yard, whispering among themselves as the swim club lined up in the front, standing to the right while their teachers gathered on the left side.

The principal rose to the podium and cleared his throat. _Mic test. One, two, three._

“Good morning, students. I have a special announcement to make on behalf of the Iwatobi High School Swim Club,” he said in a firm, even tone. “I was informed yesterday that despite being a brand new club, our swimmers placed in the top eight at the prefectural tournament, and qualified for the regional tournament. One of our students also qualified in his individual events. Congratulations.”

Rei frowned a little that his name did not merit a mention. Beside him, Nagisa flashed his classmates a victory sign with one hand, the other pointing repeatedly at Rei.

“We hope they will be able to advance to the national tournament and make our school proud. That is all,” said the principal, then clapped his hands dutifully. Everyone followed suit, giving the swim club a modest round of applause, Ama-chan quite out of place with her cheerful grin that shone brighter than anyone else’s.

* * *

As soon as everyone was dismissed, Kou and the boys walked around to the main building, where they discovered to their delight that a long banner had been hung from the wall in their honor. It announced in bold, black letters, _Congratulations to the Swim Club on Qualifying for Regionals!_

“They were really ready for this,” Nagisa marveled at the banner. Rei shook his head softly.

“It’s obvious that they reused an old banner,” he said, pointing upward as a gust of wind brushed against the fabric to reveal that _Swim Club_ had been painted on a separate sheet, then pinned onto the banner to hide the words _Judo Club_. “Ah… It still feels like a dream sometimes, but it’s finally starting to sink in that we won,” Rei added with a warm smile.

“Yup,” replied Nagisa, stepping away from the others to head to class, Rei following close behind him. “They’ll treat us like heroes when we enter the classroom!”

Kou, Haru, and Makoto remained behind to stare at the banner for a little longer. Even with the others gone, Rei’s words continued to linger in the air, just another surreal utterance in the dream Haruka had yet to wake up from. Makoto stood beside him, hands on his hips and a grin on his face, but even he felt miles away as Haru read the banner over and over again. _How strange_ , he thought. He had lost to Rin, and yet…

“We won..?” he mumbled under his breath, tasting the words that seemed weightless on his tongue, but as saying them out loud failed to anchor him to reality, Haru drifted off to class, leaving a confused Makoto behind.

* * *

By the time Makoto entered their classroom, Haru was already seated at his desk, his torso twisted towards the window to ward off interaction. His classmates had been shooting curious glances at Haru from their own desks, but with Makoto’s arrival, attention now turned to him as the next, the _only_ possible candidate.

“Good morning, everyone,” mumbled Makoto in the crossfire of their hungry gazes, feeling like a plump carcass circled by a committee of vultures.

One of the girls cleared her throat. Makoto vaguely remembered her giggling by his desk when he first joined Class 2-1.

“Tachibana-kun..” she said in a thick, nervous tone, her eyes darting from him to Haruka’s back, then to Makoto again. “Congratulations. For advancing to regionals, I mean.”

“Yeah, way to go,” said another girl with a clap of her hands, the example followed by most of their classmates, who seemed perfectly genuine in their praise for once. Makoto flushed, then lowered his head with an uneasy smile.

“Thank you, everyone,” he said quietly, “but I really didn’t do that much. Haru, and Re— I mean, Ryuugazaki-kun and Hazuki-kun, they were the ones who made it possible. They deserve praise more than I do.”

“Well, they don’t go to our class and it’s not like Nanase cares,” replied the girl who backed up her friend in congratulating the swim club, one hand thrown out to gesture vaguely at Haru in the corner. “Look at him, just sitting there like, _I am too good for the rest of the world because I am a swimmer_ , _I’m so cool_ ,” she said in a droll tone. Haruka turned his head just enough to glare at her. Makoto lifted his hands in protest.

“N-Now, I’m sure that Haru—”

“Good morning, class,” came their teacher’s voice from behind him and Makoto inched behind his seat in relief, glad he didn’t have to explain to her how insulting someone to their face would make them even less inclined to engage with their classmates than they normally would.

* * *

Fortunately for Haruka, on the last week of the first trimester, not even their teachers required his attention. For their final classes, students who had performed well on their exams had little more to do than wait patiently for their graded tests and assignments, which afforded Haru the luxury of immersing himself in the sky instead of annoying coursework. His eyes traced a line of white smoke drawn by an airplane across the everblue, more real than the chair under him or the desk his elbow rested on, until Haru found himself wondering if his fingers might graze it if he could just will himself to reach out his hand. Cotton clouds drifted in and out of his vision, flecking the blue sky like foam on the surface of water. _Water…_

Haru closed his eyes.

Waves caressed his body on either side as his memories rolled across the blank screen of his mind, pulling him back into the stadium pool of yesterday, back to the final stretch of the medley relay. A soft, steady beat rumbled in his ears, his own heart… but was it really? One moment, Haru caught a glimpse of the poolside, water streaking his goggles as his head emerged. The next moment, he was Rei, arms spread wide as his torso lifted to the surface, propelling him towards the block. When Rei’s hands touched the wall, energy surged up the concrete into Haruka’s toes, himself again as he launched off the block, diving into the water for the final stretch. He broke into a dolphin kick to reach the surface, where he rolled over and became Makoto, his mouth gaping for air with each hard pull of his arms in upside down freestyle. He turned over again to glide forward, floating along the wave feeling lighter and lighter, until he shifted into breaststroke as Nagisa, hands clasping together in silent prayer with every stroke that stretched him impossibly long. Jolts of electricity coursed over Haruka, and as his heart jumped from swimmer to swimmer, friend to friend, the beat grew faster, louder, stronger. Rei’s discipline, Makoto’s power, and Nagisa’s determination roared in Haru’s blood as he became himself again for the final spurt towards the finish, the others crying his name over and over from behind the block.

The next moment, Haru’s hands pressed against the wall, and when he looked up, Makoto’s hand reached out just for him, his face so bright it outshone the sun. Beside him, Rei and Nagisa waited with smiles on their faces. Spoken in their choked, quivering voices, Haru’s name rang out like a hallelujah, so loud it startled him out of his trance.

_Haru!_

_Haru-chan!_

_Haruka-senpai!_

Haru flinched behind his desk, eyes wide as his hand slowly sank into the folds of his shirt, just above his thrashing heart. The mist over his eyes dispersed. The chair suddenly felt too hard, the desk too cold, and Haruka, never more alive.

* * *

At the end of sixth period, Haru was the first to stand, rushing out of the classroom as though he were trying to escape everyone else, including Makoto. A few classmates stuck out their heads into the hallway to stare after him, while others looked back at his friend, who found himself squirming in the spotlight.

“Everything alright, Tachibana?” asked the same girl again with casual but unfeigned concern. Makoto pulled on a sheepish smile.

“Everything’s fine,” he replied as he sank his textbooks into his backpack.

“See, I told you Nanase doesn’t care,” she said, folding her arms together with a huff. “Even now he’s just run off and left you behind like he forgot you were there. _Nyoom_ , he dashed off without you, just like that, _nyoooom!_ ” she gestured with her hand, slashing across the air with her fingers held stiffly together.

Makoto closed his mouth, unable to refute her statements except for the fact that Haru made no such sounds in his hurry. Brutal honesty was a terrible, terrible thing.

“Excuse me,” he mumbled as he rose from his seat with the backpack under his arm, fleeing class in the hopes that he might catch up with Haruka.

* * *

Unable to find his friend along the way, Makoto joined the first-years at their usual meeting point in front of the building, his head hanging slightly as he walked over to them.

“Where’s Haruka-senpai?” asked Kou the moment he walked over to them alone. _So no one else has seen him either_ , thought Makoto.

“He seems to have wandered off,” he replied at last with an awkward smile. Rei’s brow creased.

“I wonder if he went home, even though he knows we have practice,” he said, glancing from Makoto to Nagisa, who shrugged his shoulders.

“Well, Haru-chan is kinda like that, isn’t he? He goes off on his own a lot.”

“I suppose that’s true,” said Rei with a sigh. “I wish he would warn us beforehand though…”

“ _Anyway_ ,” interrupted Nagisa in a loud, emphatic tone, taking a long step forward to coax the others along before Rei might end up gnawing on an issue that could not be helped. “Let’s talk about our future plans instead! We’ve accomplished our objective of placing at a tournament, so they should give us a bigger budget! Then we can use that budget to swim at a gym all year round!”

Rei nodded with a smile, and Makoto hummed in agreement, but Kou looked absolutely flabbergasted.

“How can you say that?!” she snapped at Nagisa, startling the others into frightened yelps. “Weren’t you listening to the principal? Our next objective is to make it to nationals!” she added, her finger pointed menacingly at the others.

“Huh?!”

“Always aim high!” replied Kou, lifting that finger towards the sky with an air of solemnity. The others stared at her in awe. Nagisa broke into an excited grin.

“Okay!” he replied, balling his hand into a fist and raising it to the sky to match Kou. “Let’s do our best to make it as high as we can go!”

“Yes!” joined in Rei, his own fingers curled up, and as if on cue, Kou and Nagisa pulled their arms back so the three of them could lift their fists up again in synch.

“ _SKYYY… HIGH!_ ” they cried in unison. Makoto blinked.

“Sky.. high..?” he mumbled, the phrase sounding oddly familiar, but the moment the others lowered their arms, Kou spun around and broke into a jog.

“I’ll be the first one in the club room!” she cried with a giggle.

A moment later, Rei gave his glasses a firm push, then twirled around on his tiptoes to pursue her.

“I do not think so, Kou-san!” they heard him say, Nagisa and Makoto staring as the two of them turned around the corner. Nagisa laughed as he turned back to Makoto.

“Race you, Mako-chan?” he said with a wink. Makoto just barely stifled his own laughter.

“You’re on, Nagisa,” he replied.

As soon as Nagisa dashed off, Makoto slapped his cheeks to make sure the burst of happiness in his chest wasn’t a dream.

His face felt crisp, and his joy real indeed.

 _So you think you can beat a former track and field athlete… then watch out!_ he thought to himself with a grin. He then broke into a sprint, managing to beat all of them to the changing room with a few seconds to spare.

* * *

Reliable as ever, Kou had revised the boys’ training regimens the evening before school, so once they changed into their swimsuits, she called them over to tell them her plans for today’s practice.

“We’ll mainly be running drills for now,” she began, consulting her papers for each swimmer. “Rei-kun, you’ll be working on your kick. You’ll be training to develop a faster and stronger kick.”

“Yes, ma’am,” replied Rei with an obliging smile.

“Nagisa-kun, you’ll focus on strengthening your crawl stroke,” continued Kou.

“Okay!” chirped Nagisa.

Finally, Kou turned to Makoto.

“And Makoto-senpai, you need to work on making your acceleration more even.”

“Alright,” replied Makoto, unsure how he was meant to do that, but almost certain Kou or Rei would be able to help him. Kou flashed him a smile, then picked up a stack of towels to take with her to the pool, the others following obediently behind her.

“Well, let’s start warming up then—” she began to say, her voice trailing off as she heard a splash. She turned towards the pool in disbelief. The water frothed, there was another splash, then two hands emerged from below to clamp onto the edge, followed by a mop of soaked black hair.

“Haru!” cried Makoto as Haruka clambered out of the pool, shaking wet locks out of his eyes. The others stared at him pleasantly surprised.

“You were already here, huh,” said Nagisa with a grin. Haru wiped at his dripping face.

“Here,” Kou stepped closer, offering her stack of towels to him. Haru picked one off the top, draping it over his head to dry his hair.

“Thanks,” he said quietly.

“Haru-chan’s really motivated,” whispered Nagisa to Rei and Makoto. Rei quirked his brow.

“Perhaps he’s upset about losing his freestyle event,” he mused, obviously at a loss as to what else might be behind Haruka’s display of voluntary effort. Makoto bit his lip. Back at the stadium, he told Rin Haru was not upset about having lost the race, but could he really be sure? The more he tried to untangle Haru’s feelings, the more they split between his fingers in a million directions, mysterious and complicated as ever. Was there anyone who truly knew his heart..?

“Maybe,” conceded Nagisa, watching Kou and Haruka talk by the pool.

“How long have you been swimming?” asked Kou.

“Not very long,” replied Haruka, rubbing vigorously at his hair.

“It’s hot out today, so I brought some ice to keep your drinks cold.”

“I appreciate it.”

“I’m happy to see you so motivated, Haruka-senpai,” said Kou next, beaming up at Haruka, whose hands stopped rubbing circles against the fabric.

“I’m not,” he said in a low voice, pulling the towel off his head. Kou stared at him confused. Haru did not meet her eye. “I was swimming because I didn’t know what to do.”

Everyone now seemed to stare at him in wait of an explanation, as if Haru owed them a three-page essay due this very minute. His shoulders grew stiff as he pulled them defensively together.

“I figured I should ask the water about matters involving water,” he said at last, hoping it made perfect sense to everyone else as well, but Rei and Nagisa exchanged puzzled looks, and Kou’s lips curled into a small ‘o’. Only Makoto seemed placated by his words, his features carefully guarded as he studied the stiff arch of Haru’s posture and the hard lines of his throat, every inch of him speaking of discomfort, and the desire not to be quizzed any further for words he couldn’t find.

Something akin to gladness melted over Makoto, who closed his eyes with a tender smile. Well, if Haru didn’t want to talk, the solution was simple.

“What do you mean?” pressed Kou. Haru now turned his head slightly, but Makoto took a step forward, and another brought him close enough to speak.

“Well, everyone’s here now,” he said from behind her back in a gentle but firm tone, his eyes locked innocently into hers. “We should probably start practice.”

Kou blinked at him as if she had quite forgotten about practice and Makoto’s words were her wake-up call. She cleared her throat with flushed cheeks.

“Oh, yes, you’re right. Then, everybody should start by warming up,” she said next, looking to Rei as their resident instructor.

“Yes ma’am!” replied Rei with a smart salute, turning to the others with a smirk as soon as he felt in charge. “Everyone, please gather in front of me and we shall conduct our warm-up stretches! Makoto-san, if you please!”

“Coming,” said Makoto, his eyes still on Haruka, who allowed himself but a glance at his friend, then stepped to the edge of the pool. He dove in again, this time to escape the others for a while longer, feeling as embarrassingly transparent to Makoto as illuminated projector sheets.


	46. EPISODE 9: Hesitant Loosen Up! - Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I looked up the parts of a yukata ensemble because these different parts will appear separately in the chapter, so please have this insightful rundown from Wikipedia:
> 
> "A standard yukata ensemble consists of a cotton undergarment (juban), yukata, obi, bare feet, sandals (geta), a foldable or fixed hand fan, and a carry bag (kinchaku)."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once practice was over, the swim club split into two groups as usual: Makoto and Haru headed towards the bay, and the first-years to their respective trains at Iwatobi Station. However, while the second-years walked away in silence, Haru tongue tied and Makoto too mindful of him to speak, Kou soon engaged her companions in discussion about the possibility of enlisting Coach Sasabe’s help before the regional tournament.

“If he accepted our invitation to prefecturals and said he would come to watch us at regionals, then he must be interested! This is our chance!” she told Nagisa and Rei, who tried to voice their doubts about Sasabe’s commitment to the swim club, what with having his hands full with pizza delivery, to no avail. Kou held her ground to the last, insisting they had to at least try, until the vice-captain saw reason and finally gave their manager permission to proceed.

Her business now happily concluded, Kou promised them she would make arrangements as soon as possible, then boarded her train in improved spirits. After her brother had ignored all her texts about the swim club, regionals, and the possibility of the two of them meeting up on Saturday, Kou desperately needed a distraction, and pursuing her freshly revived goal of securing a proper instructor for the swim club was just what the doctor ordered.

As her train pulled out of the station, she waved to Nagisa and Rei all smiles, the boys returning the gesture with matching enthusiasm until Kou and the train blurred into the distance. Only then did Nagisa’s wave turn into a long, stiff stretch of his arms, and his grin into an obscenely huge yawn. A moment later, he let his tired knees buckle at last, plopping down on the bench behind him like a sack of potatoes.

“Aaah, I’m so pooped,” he moaned, pressing his back against the wood. Rei shook his head softly, but soon perched himself next to Nagisa. “Practice was so hard today..!”

“And it’s going to get even harder if Kou-san really does manage to persuade Sasabe-sensei to coach us,” replied Rei, fixing his glasses with a push. “Well, at least Haruka-senpai seems sufficiently motivated, and Makoto-san is doing much better than before…” he carried on, his faraway voice evaporating into thoughtful silence.

Nagisa stayed quiet for a moment, waiting for him to continue, but when Rei didn’t, Nagisa rolled his head over to him with diminishing patience.

“What are you thinking about, Rei-chan?” he nudged his friend, his brow quirked. Rei shifted in his seat, but he showed Nagisa a small smile nonetheless.

“I was thinking about Makoto-san, and how much he has improved in every way,” he replied, looking into the distance. “Not just in terms of his technique or his ability to stay calm in the water, though that is certainly a huge improvement, but rather.. I feel that he is beginning to grow more comfortable around us, and acting more like his true self than before.”

“His true self?” blinked Nagisa. Rei nodded, his expression guarded.

“He used to be very secretive and tense, understandably, and the tournament was obviously a stressful experience for him, but recently I noticed how Makoto-san has a natural disposition to regard and promote the interests of others, and kindly provide where he perceives a need.”

“Like taking care of Haru-chan?” asked Nagisa in a cheeky tone, dotting his sentence with a wink. Rei made a face.

“Nagisa-kun… I wasn’t even thinking about Haruka-senpai.”

“You weren’t?” stared Nagisa, obviously caught off guard. Rei fixed his glasses with a smirk.

“Haven’t you noticed that during the tournament, Makoto-san spoke up at least twice in my favor without any of us soliciting his input?”

“Ah, that’s right,” replied Nagisa, poking a finger at his chin. “You mean telling us to let you pick lunch and take your certificates home?”

“Precisely. In both cases, you and the others were talking over me—”

“Sorry, Rei-chan…” mumbled Nagisa, eyes wide and lips twitching into a small, apologetic smile. Rei’s shone a little brighter in reply.

“Apology accepted,” he said in a warm tone. “But, what I was trying to say is that Makoto-san was listening to us, noticed my interests were being ignored, and attempted to remedy the situation by suggesting a well-reasoned alternative that would be acceptable to all of us. I suppose that, as an older brother to much younger siblings, he is very adept at reading cues and figuring out solutions to arising problems… and from what I can tell, this is a very natural tendency for him. I first thought about it on the night Makoto-san sent us home instead of letting us wait for Haruka-senpai in the cold, and stressed the importance of Kou-san’s safety. I thought his thoughtfulness was very admirable, and providing for others suits him very well as a person, so I think that we should foster these natural tendencies so Makoto-san could feel more comfortable among us. He is the only club member with no special rank, so perhaps letting him act as a voice of reason in times of indecision would make him feel more appreciated as a teammate…”

“Yup! See, I told you Mako-chan was nice from the beginning,” replied Nagisa with his arms folded over his chest, obviously proud of himself for being an excellent judge of character. Rei shot him a sheepish look.

“You did, Nagisa-kun…” he replied, looking away. Nagisa gave him a playful nudge.

“Then, while you’re at it, you could also admit that Mako-chan takes good care of Haru-chan, too!” he said with another wink.

Rei’s nostrils flared indignantly as he drew a sharp breath, then blew it out in a sigh.

“ _Fine,_ ” he huffed, “I will not deny that I’ve noticed how often Makoto-san interjects or acts on Haruka-senpai’s behalf, and how Haruka-senpai seems to allow these unsolicited kindnesses despite his distant nature. He even volunteered to help Makoto-san improve his acceleration, and devoted a great deal of attention to him.. but I cannot shake the feeling that it was partly to distract himself from what happened at the tournament…”

“You mean losing to Rin-chan?” asked Nagisa as their train glided onto the platform. The two of them now gathered their backpacks, then climbed aboard to find some empty seats.

“Yes… I mean, I’m glad Haruka-senpai is serious about our training, but I wish it were because he’s enthusiastic rather than upset,” explained Rei as they squeezed past a group of students to find two unclaimed seats on the side. They sank down in relief, schoolbags propped on their feet. Nagisa dropped his head on Rei’s shoulder out of habit.

“Yeah…” he sighed, his gaze falling to Rei’s knees. “Maybe Haru-chan could use a break to take his mind off swimming.”

Rei’s brow creased as he cupped his chin in thought.

“I agree, but with the regional tournament coming up, I don’t think we have the luxury of missing even a single day of practice if we want to stand a chance of advancing to nationals.”

“True… I wish there was more time,” moped Nagisa. “The relay will be right after my birthday, so I can’t even celebrate that..!”

“I’m really sorry, Nagisa-kun,” said Rei, giving him a tender look. “But please don’t despair! I’m certain once the regional tournament is over, all of us will be free to spend the night celebrating our accomplishments and honoring your birthday.”

“That would be nice..!” breathed Nagisa, his eyes twinkling at the thought of eating a large, handsome birthday cake surrounded by friends. And speaking of friends…

“But we have important matters to attend to first!” he said, lifting his head from Rei’s shoulder. “If we want to swim a relay, we have to make sure Haru-chan feels good enough to swim with us, so now the question is, is there anything we can do to take Haru-chan’s mind off swimming and help him unwind, even if it’s only for one night?”

“Hmm… do you mean something like an outing?” asked Rei. Nagisa nodded fervently. “Well, let me see… ah, I think I’ve overheard our classmates mentioning something about an upcoming festival this weekend? I believe it was Wakamatsu-kun who brought it up.”

Having only a vague recollection of the particulars, Rei did not expect Nagisa to have any idea what their classmates were talking about, but Nagisa’s eyes lit up instantly.

“Rei-chan, you’re a _genius!_ ” he cried, his words smearing Rei’s cheeks a light pink. “I almost forgot! Wakamatsu-kun must have been talking about Hachiman-sama’s Festival!”

“Hachiman-sama’s…?”

“ _Fes-ti-val_ , Rei-chan! I think I saw some posters around town, but my sisters said they wanted to go, so I forgot all about it and was gonna spend the weekend doing something else,” he explained, not noticing how little sense he made to a boy who adored his older sibling, and would have gladly spent time at a festival with him. “But now you made me remember! Oh, Rei-chan, this’ll be _perfect!_ I can just tell everyone I’m going with the swim club, and if we take Haru-chan, he will soon forget all about Rin-chan because of all the food and festival games! It’s perfect, I tell you!”

“Yes, yes, but Nagisa-kun, how are we going to entice Haruka-senpai to come?” muttered Rei, who began to regret having mentioned the festival, and already mourning the dent it would make in his wallet. “He’s rather reluctant when it comes to socializing with others…”

“Simple,” replied Nagisa, his voice dropping to a whisper. “We’ll lure him in with Mako-chan.”

“Eh? What do you mean?” blurted Rei, his voice instinctively hushed to match Nagisa’s, whose chin brushed against Rei’s shoulder as he leaned closer to say,

“All we have to do is go to Haru-chan’s house, tell him Mako-chan is coming with us, and then he’ll want to tag along for sure..!”

Rei gave him a glare.

“That sounds dishonest, Nagisa-kun, and besides, why are you so certain it would work at all? I still say you are delusional about the two of them.”

Nagisa puffed his cheeks indignantly.

“I know what I’m saying, Rei-chan, and I’m saying this would definitely work.”

“But, Nagisa-kun, we haven’t even invited Makoto-san yet…”

“To nab Haru-chan, it’ll be enough if we just say we have, and I bet if we did the same thing to Mako-chan, then they would both end up coming because of each other..!” breathed Nagisa, his eyes gleaming in excitement. Rei gave him a flat look.

“Nagisa-kun…”

“Yes, Rei-chan?”

“Why are we whispering?” asked Rei, finally raising his voice and straightening his shoulders. “We’re on a noise-polluted train, and no one is here to eavesdrop on us.”

Nagisa shrugged his shoulders.

“It seemed appropriate for hatching a plot.”

“ _Hatching a plot…_ ” repeated Rei, his eye twitching. “No, no, no and _no,_ Nagisa-kun, you can just forget about your ridiculous idea right now! As vice-captain, I hereby exercise my right to veto this entire scheme!”

“ _But Rei-chaaaan…!_ ” whined Nagisa, nudging his head repeatedly against his friend’s arm, but no amount of burrowing worked on Rei, who had grown quite used to the sensation.

“I said no and that’s final!” replied Rei, folding his arms rigidly together as he turned his head archly to the side. Nagisa peered up at him.

“Rei-chan..”

Rei turned back just enough to shoot him a glare.

“What is it now..?”

Nagisa batted his eyelashes, his face innocence itself.

“I bet you one thousand yen it’ll work.”

Rei’s brow twitched. He narrowed his eyes in thought.

“So you are that confident in your ridiculous idea?”

“I am!” replied Nagisa, his eyes sparking fiercely. Rei’s heart jumped in excitement.

“ _Fine…_ ” he murmured, the urge to lower his voice just like Nagisa did earlier returning as he succumbed to the thrill of a new challenge. “I will allow this.. strange experiment, but I have two conditions.”

“Fire away,” Nagisa whispered back with a grin. Rei cleared his throat, though he kept his voice to a bare minimum.

“First of all, the four of us must go together, or there is no point in attending the festival. If your experiment fails with either party, it will be your duty to persuade them to come.”

“It’ll work, so sure, whatever!” replied Nagisa. “And your second condition?”

Rei pursed his lips. He adjusted his glasses with a single finger.

“As vice-captain, I insist we all wear yukata to the festival to look like a uniform group, so in summary, you will have to persuade Makoto-san and Haruka-senpai to come with us in appropriate festival wear, or I won’t pay you a sen.”

Nagisa licked his lip as if savoring Rei’s words, but after a moment’s consideration, he nodded with a wide grin.

“Alright, yukata for everybody! This’ll be the easiest one thousand yen I’ve ever earned!” he replied in a sweet tone, causing Rei to scoff and turn his head in embarrassment at the memory of losing his previous bet. At least in hindsight, Nagisa-kun was merely lucky there. Rei argued for an attentive and nurturing female classmate, and he argued for a pushy, no-nonsense guy who wasn’t afraid of Haruka-senpai’s standoffish demeanor – and in the end, they were both wrong.

* * *

Just like Rei and Nagisa, the captain of the Samezuka swim team had also set his sights on Hachiman-sama’s Festival, for several convenient reasons. Firstly, the festival was dedicated to the god of water, so to Seijuurou’s mind, it was only common sense to pay their respects before regionals, and pray for victory to strengthen team morale. The second reason, tying conveniently into the first one, was that after so much arduous training, his men were in desperate need of entertainment and society, which a festival could surely supply in abundance. And thirdly, though by no means lastly, he received a text on Monday from Kou-san, who inquired about her brother, and the possibility of his coming to Hachiman-sama’s Festival. Unable to let the opportunity pass, Seijuurou promised her at once that he and his entire swim team would attend the festival without fail. If nothing else could have convinced him that Iwatobi Bay was a desirable destination on Saturday evening, the sweet promise of waiting upon Kou-san worked wonders on Seijuurou every time, so come Tuesday afternoon, he announced to his team that they would visit the shrine on Saturday evening, no excuses, and no exceptions. _Including you, Matsuoka._

To most of the Samezuka swimmers, the captain’s announcement was a cause for joy. Aiichiro in particular was in raptures at the idea of attending a festival, but Rin could just barely keep himself from making sour faces. Although Mikoshiba mentioned no other cause for going than visiting the shrine, Rin was almost certain his meddlesome sister somehow had her hand in the sudden compulsory event. Since his suspicion could not be refuted without asking either her or the captain, the thought continued to haunt Rin for the rest of the week, all the way to his last hour of practice on Saturday afternoon.

By the end of his final lap that fateful day, Rin was heaving in earnest as he pulled off his swimming cap. His entire week had been nothing but school and practice, exerting himself as much as he could to empty his head and keep unwanted thoughts at bay, but now the captain was going to force him into dawdling aimlessly around Iwatobi Bay, eating junk food and watching grown men wrestle squid, making fools of themselves. _What a waste…_

He hoisted himself out of the water, then headed to the showers, planning to take so long the others might be all gone by the time he finished. He was out of luck, however. After soaking himself and massaging his scalp for what seemed like ages, he still found Nitori in the locker room, where Aiichiro had been dabbing himself dry little by little just to have a reason for staying behind.

“Senpai, you’ve been swimming very well,” he greeted Rin the moment he came into view. Rin sighed.

“I guess,” he replied, his tone quiet as he opened his own locker to pull out his tracksuit. A few feet away, Aiichiro finally found himself dry enough to dress, so he soon produced an entire stack from the lockers: his chosen attire for the festival.

“You posted a personal best during the group stage, so it looks like your decision to focus on the one-hundred meter freestyle paid off,” he spoke again, hoping to engage his senpai, but Rin seemed too engrossed in straightening the sleeves of his jacket to answer. Aiichiro closed his eyes. “I wasn’t able to make it to the final,” he added with a bittersweet smile.

“Yeah, too bad,” replied Rin.

Aiichiro’s smile lost its bitterness.

“But Senpai, you have to do your best!” he said at once, turning around with a determined expression. “I’ll do everything I can to support you!”

He was hoping for a hum or at least a nod, but Rin merely stared off into space like he hadn’t even heard him. Nitori watched him worried.

“Huh? Senpai?”

Rin’s mouth opened, but no reply came. Instead he pursed his lips, then turned away from Nitori and left the lockers for the end of the row, where he sat down to dry his hair. Aiichiro hurried after him, one foot still missing a sock.

“Is something wrong?”

“Not really.”

Rin now busied himself with a bottle, sipping slowly at its contents. Nitori furrowed his brow.

“You were so happy about beating Nanase-san,” he risked to say, his eyes fixed on Rin’s face. His senpai lowered the bottle.

“Yeah…”

Nitori’s face brightened.

“Then you can move on now!” he said with a happy grin, but Rin flinched at the words, his hand dragging the towel downwards to hide his face. Nitori leaned closer. A moment later, the door of the locker room swung open.

“Hey, hurry up,” barked Mikoshiba from the doorway. “We’re leaving in fifteen minutes!”

“Y-Yes!” cried Nitori, straightening at once, then hurrying back for his missing sock.

Rin frowned. Seijuurou quirked his brow.

“You too, Matsuoka,” he added, his tone steely. Rin tensed, but said nothing, glad for only one thing: that Haru had never been in the habit of attending festivals. As long as Haru wasn’t there, things would be fine.

* * *

As for the Iwatobi Swim Club, their last week of school was spent rather cheerfully, especially for the upper management. Having learned from Makoto, who had succeeded twice without fail, Kou convinced Ama-chan to stay behind after practice, then dialed Pizza Boy to order a large pepperoni pizza, leaving precise instructions about the location of the Faculty Office and their delivery person of choice. Within half an hour, which was spent clearing Amakata Miho’s desk and getting some napkins from the cafeteria, the unsuspecting victim was staring pitifully at the two ladies, who awaited him with their arms folded.

“Good day, Sasabe-san,” chirped Ama-chan.

“Glad you could join us,” said Kou, her fingers steepled beneath her chin.

“You gotta be kidding me,” muttered Sasabe, but it was no use. Having fallen for the trick a third time, they detained him with kind force until he agreed to free up as much time next week as he could, and take the swim club under his wing at last.

Meanwhile, Nagisa and Rei spent their days preparing for Hachiman-sama’s Festival. Both checked, then aired out their yukatas, Nagisa arranged to leave separately from his sisters, and Rei gathered information on upcoming events just to have a few enticements up his sleeve, should Haruka-senpai prove difficult to convince. Intent as he was on winning the bet, he could not bring himself to jeopardize their outing _too much_ , so all he allowed himself and Nagisa to do for the sake of their plans was tell Haru and Makoto that they should be on standby for the weekend just in case Coach Sasabe might volunteer to train everyone, internally grateful that Kou had offered them such a handy excuse.

They were in luck. Haruka acknowledged the possibility with a shrug, and since his friend had no objections, Makoto found himself simply unable to mention any of his own. He forced a smile, told the vice-captain he would be available, then informed his parents and siblings when he came home that he might not be able to attend Hachiman-sama’s Festival at all.

* * *

Finally, the fated day arrived. As usual, practice lasted from late morning till early afternoon, after which the vice-captain kindly advised Makoto and Haru to go home and spend the rest of their day “on standby.” Nagisa hardly knew how he managed to keep saying it with a straight face, but it didn’t matter anymore. Once Haruka hummed and Makoto nodded in silence, everyone went their respective ways, some more enthusiastically than others.

Having successfully survived the week without dropping any spoilers, Nagisa and Rei continued to bide their time for a few hours longer, until it was time to don their yukatas and join forces at last. They met up by Rei’s apartment, then boarded the earliest train to Iwatobi, to put _Operation: Double Bind_ into action.

As Haruka lived further up the stone stairs, Makoto was to be their first victim, and Nagisa found himself cracking his knuckles in anticipation as Rei rang the bell by the Tachibana gate. He briefly wondered who would open the door for them, then started dreading the possibility of having to deceive an adult, but they were in luck. After a few moments, Makoto was the one to greet them, standing there in slippers, a shirt, and sweatpants.

“Good evening, Nagisa, Rei..” he stammered at the sight of their sharp, colorful yukatas complete with matching kinchakus hanging from their obis. Staring at them, Makoto felt terribly underdressed. “What are you doing here?”

Rei adjusted his glasses before clasping his hands together behind his back. Nagisa nodded to him, then turned to Makoto with an eager grin.

“We have come to pick you up, Mako-chan!” he replied cheerfully. Makoto balked.

“Eh? Pick me up?”

“Mh-mm! Tonight is the first night of Hachiman-sama’s Festival, so let’s go, Mako-chan!”

“O—oh, the festival,” mumbled Makoto, scratching his cheek with a finger. “I’ve heard about it and wondered if we might go, but I wasn’t sure if anyone else wanted to…”

Rei’s eyes widened.

“You were going to suggest it to us, Makoto-san?” he asked, his tone laden with guilt at the thought that they had severed all attempts at the root with their ridiculous demands to put everyone on standby. Makoto blinked, then lowered his eyes with an awkward smile.

“I confess I thought about it,” he explained, “but then you told us to be on standby, and Haru said he would rather stay at home anyway, so in the end, I decided not to say anything.”

Nagisa took a wary glance at Rei, who straightened his shoulders with a smirk of _I told you so_. Nagisa dissolved into nervous laughter.

“Na—aaah, on the contrary, Mako-chan!” he blurted, his face contorted into an uneasy grin. “It was just a clever ruse! We are also on our way to pick up Haru-chan!”

“Eh?!” cried Makoto. Nagisa nodded so fiercely, the folds of his yukata jumped with every bang of his head.

“Haru-chan is coming with us, so hurry up and put on your yukata, Mako-chan!”

“ _My yukata?!_ ” blurted Makoto. Rei gave him a barely perceivable nod as Nagisa held out his hands to the sides to showcase his yukata.

“Yes, your yukata, Mako-chan! We are all going in yukata, even Haru-chan, so hurry up and put on your yukata, okay?”

For one moment, Makoto found himself wondering about Haru and what his yukata might look like. The thought brought some color to his face.

“R-Right, I’ll get dressed,” he stammered, growing more and more confused by the minute. “Will you wait for me or should I just head to the festival when I’m done?”

“We will come back for you once we picked up Haru-chan!” replied Nagisa. “Now _hurry, Mako-chaaan!_ ”

“I’m going, _I’m going!!_ ” cried Makoto as he slammed the gate shut and ran off, soon disappearing inside his house. Rei gave Nagisa a dirty look, but the culprit merely grinned and gave him a thumbs up, tipping his finger downwards right after.

“One down, one to go,” he chirped. Rei scoffed.

“It’s only because you rushed him,” he muttered with narrowed eyes. Nagisa pretended not to hear him. After such a successful attack, he all but danced up the stone stairs towards Haruka’s house, leaving Rei no choice but to follow and observe.

* * *

As the two of them headed up the stone steps, Makoto stormed up the stairs to his room, unaware that his siblings and mother poked their heads into the hallway, astonished at his sudden retreat without a syllable said about who had rung the doorbell and what they wanted. Makoto closed the door behind him, then hurried to his wardrobe, where his yukata waited on a hanger in the far back. Makoto sighed in relief when he at last pulled it out. He pressed it to his chest in front of the built-in mirror to take a look… then let out a shriek so loud the house shook in its wake.

There was a flurry of footsteps up the staircase and the twins came barging in, followed closely by Makoto’s mother.

“What’s wrong, Makoto?” she called out as she climbed the final steps, then stuck her head inside Makoto’s room, where the twins stood with their hands pressed firmly to their mouths not to laugh. Makoto turned around pale-faced, the garment dangling from his grasp.

“Mom, I’ve outgrown my yukata..!” he whined, holding out the yukata he was bought when he turned fourteen, just a few months before another growth spurt rendered his entire wardrobe useless. Its sleeves no longer covered Makoto’s arm, while the waist looked cinched against his torso. The twins burst out in laughter. Their mother, more tactful, managed to smother hers.

“Oh my… we should have bought you a new one for the summer,” she said, her tone appropriately apologetic. Makoto let out a groan.

“What do I do now?” he begged her. “It was Nagisa and Rei, and they insisted I come to the festival in a yukata or I’ll stick out like a sore thumb!”

“What’s wrong?” asked his father from the doorway, having left his work behind to see what the commotion was about.

“Onii-chan’s too big for his yukata,” replied Ren, pointing to his brother with a finger. Makoto’s shoulders slumped.

“The swim club’s coming to pick me up for the festival, and they insisted I wear a yukata,” he explained, his face scrunched up in panic. “They were telling me all week to stay on standby for training so I thought nobody was going to go, but apparently everyone agreed to.. even Haru…”

“So the only one they didn’t tell was you?” asked his mother, her tone incredulous. Makoto nodded with a heavy heart.

“It seems so… maybe they just wanted to surprise me, but still…” he sighed as he lowered the yukata, wringing the fabric subconsciously until it bunched into clumps in his hands. “If they had told me in advance, I could have bought a new yukata. Without one.. maybe it’s better I don’t go.”

The twins no longer laughed or smiled. Instead they peered awkwardly at their mother, who in turn shot a look at Makoto’s father. He cupped his chin in thought, then looked up again to flash his son a soothing smile.

“Well, if you’ve outgrown your yukata, then there’s only one thing to do. I will lend you mine for the night,” he said, his eyes searching Makoto’s. “We are about the same height, so I think it will fit you just fine.”

Makoto perked up almost instantly.

“Really? Is that okay?” he blurted wide-eyed, some color returning to his cheeks. His father hummed with a smile.

“Since it seemed like you wouldn’t be able to go at all, we decided to wait until tomorrow, and now I have some leftover work to take care of, so I will definitely not need it tonight.”

“Thank you!” cried Makoto, who put down his old yukata to follow his father to the master bedroom, where he was entrusted with an entire ensemble for the night: a soft cotton juban, a juniper green yukata with thin vertical stripes, a black obi, a kinchaku just big enough for his wallet and keys, and his father’s geta for appropriate footwear. His father humbly retired while his son changed clothes, only stopping on the way to his home office to receive a _thank you_ kiss from his wife, who had left Makoto’s room with the twins to put away Makoto’s too-small yukata until Ren would be old enough to claim it for himself.

Back in the master bedroom, Makoto dressed up, cleaned his face in the bathroom, then put on some cologne for good measure. By the time he finally emerged, all his essentials put into the kinchaku for safekeeping, his mother and the twins were waiting for him in the hallway to say goodbye.

“How do I look?” asked Makoto, turning around to show off the yukata with his father’s handheld fan tucked into the back. The twins gasped in delight.

“Onii-chan looks so pretty!” said Ran. Ren nodded in agreement.

Makoto colored and let out an awkward laugh in reply, while his mother stepped over to him with a smile, pulling her son’s head downwards to comb a few rogue spikes into their proper place on top of Makoto’s head.

“Now you’re ready,” she said as she hugged him. “Enjoy yourself, alright?”

“And bring back souvenirs!” chimed in Ran and Ren.

“Now, now,” said Makoto with a smile, “you are going tomorrow so we’ll buy something nice then, okay?”

“Awww..” whined the twins, but they cheered up when Makoto reached out to ruffle their hair on his way to the door.

“Fine, we’ll buy things tomorrow!”

“Take care, Onii-chan!”

“I will! Please tell dad I’m really thankful!” replied Makoto, and with a small bow, he opened the front door and stepped out, heading to the gate with a lighter heart. Even if they didn’t invite him beforehand, what did it matter now? At least they didn’t completely forget about him, and now they were all going to Hachiman-sama’s…

* * *

“…Festival?” mumbled Haruka in the doorway, standing barefoot in nothing but a shirt and shorts, having clearly intended to stay inside. Nagisa and Rei nodded with innocent grins on their faces, Rei once again drawing back to let Nagisa handle business.

“Yup, tonight is the night of Hachiman-sama’s Festival, so let’s go, Haru-chan!”

Haruka’s face stiffened. He instinctively took a step backwards at the sudden attack on his privacy, finding it as offensive as their constant visits had been at the beginning of the trimester, when Nagisa and Rei seemed to hang around him constantly…

“I don’t want to go,” he replied at once, drawing further back. “Didn’t you tell me like ten times to stay on standby for training?”

Nagisa swallowed. At his own words slapped back in his face, beads of sweat formed on his forehead, and if Haru resisted for long, Nagisa would surely be drenched by the time they got to the bay.

“But, but Haru-chan, don’t you want to hang out with us?” he whined, his eyes as large and wide as a puppy dog’s. Haruka frowned. “Everyone’s waiting for you to go, including Mako-chan!”

Haru let out a sound not unlike a surprised hiccup. He stared at Nagisa in shock.

“Makoto..?” he blurted with tinged cheeks, his tone lower and softer than before. Rei squinted at him, but Nagisa cracked a cheerful grin as he wiped his brow.

“Yup! Mako-chan is putting on his yukata right now and he’ll be waiting for us by the gate!” he giggled nervously, fanning himself in short bursts. Haru’s cheeks grew a little warmer at the thought of Makoto clad in yukata. Nagisa’s face softened.

“Well, Haru-chan?” he asked gently, his heartbeat slowing down from its former frantic beat. “Shall we all go to the festival with Mako-chan?”

“ _In yukata_ ,” muttered Rei flatly in the back.

“In yukata,” agreed Nagisa in a feather-light tone.

“In yukata…” Haru repeated after them as though he were talking in his sleep, his fingers curled into loose fists by his side. “..Okay. I’ll get dressed.”

Rei stared at him mortified. He hoped Haruka would put up some last-minute struggle, but the captain seemed calm, and apparently persuaded that donning a yukata to join them for Makoto’s sake was his only possible course of action in this matter. A moment later, Haru pulled the door shut. It was only then that Nagisa turned to Rei, his face beaming in a triumphant grin.

Rei glared at him.

Nagisa lifted a hand towards him, wiggling his fingers expectantly.

Rei pursed his lips.

Nagisa batted his lashes.

Rei let out an exasperated growl as he dug into his kinchaku for his wallet, yanking out a one thousand yen bill and all but slapping it into Nagisa’s waiting hand.

“Thank you, Rei-chan..” chirped Nagisa as he folded the bill, then gingerly tucked it away by his chest, straight down the folds of his dotted yukata. Rei reached for his fan to hold it over his face, his ears burning behind it.

“You are diabolical,” he whispered from behind his cover. Nagisa pretended it was a compliment.

* * *

While the two of them waited by the front door, Haruka hurried into the bathroom to examine his face. He had taken a bath about an hour ago, but found his face looked rather sickly in the light, so he washed them with soap, rubbing his cheeks vigorously as if trying to blot out unwelcome thoughts, in particular the question of why Makoto didn’t tell him he was going to the festival. _Didn’t I tell him, no more secrets…_ Haru thought to himself bitterly, but it was no use. He promised to go in yukata, so he left the bathroom for his room upstairs, where the wardrobe hopefully held his yukata in the far back. He poked around for a while, then finally lifted it out, peeling it off its hanger.

He pulled it on in front of the mirror. The fabric snagged on his shoulder.

“ _Oh,_ ” sighed Haruka, staring flatly at his reflection, where the yukata dangled about his knees like a short, indecent summer dress. How could he forget? He had last worn it when he was thirteen, forced to go with his parents to a festival much like the one he was going to attend now. After that night, Haru stuffed his yukata into the very back of the wardrobe, where it lay unchanged over the years as Haruka’s boyish figure stretched into a young man’s taller form. His shoulders sagged until his yukata slipped to the ground. Haru heaved another sigh.

Unlike Makoto, however, he did not panic. Next to his room was his parents’ old bedroom, complete with a larger wardrobe that held all the clothes they refused to take with them when they moved away. There Haru found his father’s old yukata, navy blue with thin horizontal stripes, and a black obi around its waist. Haru went back to his own room to try it on, breathing through his mouth all the while to avoid the smell of lavender that protected their clothes from moths. Though the garment reached a little lower than necessary, the emergency replacement felt every bit as comfortable as Haru could reasonably hope. Next, he put on the entire ensemble, checking himself again in the bathroom to see if his complexion improved, and once he dabbed on enough cologne to mask the scent of lavender, Haru braced himself to reunite with Nagisa and Rei.

Outside, the former greeted him with a grin, while the latter did his best to look appreciative.

“Ah, you look good, Haru-chan!” said Nagisa, positively beaming at him. Haru turned his head at the praise, looking strangely bitter. Rei’s brow creased.

“Perhaps a little austere, but I suppose that’s simply your personal taste,” he said at last, a little disappointed that Haru’s yukata was not as colorful or as elaborately patterned as their own. Haru merely shrugged his shoulders. Nagisa gave Rei a look before he tugged on his sleeve.

“Well, shall we go and get Mako-chan?”

At his words, Haru’s head turned back to them a little too quickly. Rei squinted at him, still refusing to believe Nagisa out of sheer stubbornness.

“Let’s go!” cheered Nagisa, his mood in high heaven at having become one thousand yens richer. Haru simply sighed, then followed the two of them to the stone stairs, glimpsing a dark figure down by the gate before they even reached the single torii.

“Here we are, Mako-chan!” Nagisa called out. Makoto lifted his head, breaking into a hapless smile when he finally spotted Haru behind Nagisa and Rei. Haru colored and turned his head, one hand drawing his yukata a little tighter around his chest.

“Have you been waiting long?” asked Nagisa when they reached Makoto, who cocked his head to the side with good-natured looks.

“No, I just got here.”

“Wow! Good one, Mako-chan!” cried Nagisa, thoroughly impressed. “Rei-chan, Haru-chan, take note,” he continued with a wag of his finger, “if you arrive early for a date, this is what you have to say.”

“Yes, yes,” Rei hushed him. Nagisa now feasted his eyes on Makoto’s yukata.

“Oooh, you look very manly, Mako-chan!” he said, giving Makoto a thorough look all over. Makoto laughed. Rei gave him a small, awkward smile.

“Again, the fabric is a little austere…” he mumbled, his eyes flitting from Haruka to Makoto. Nagisa followed his eyes, then gasped in realization.

“Ah, they _match!_ ” he said, pointing from Haru to Makoto. “They are different colors and the stripes go different ways, but they kind of match if you squint your eyes,” he explained with a grin. Haruka paled. Makoto flushed crimson.

“Ah, haha, I guess you’re right… I hope this is okay,” he stammered, unable to look at any of them. Haru turned his head again, his eyes falling on a tuft of grass by the steps.

“It’s fine,” he mumbled. “You look fine.”

Quiet as he was, Makoto flashed him a grateful smile.

“I’m so glad… this is not my own yukata, you see,” he blurted in relief. “My dad lent me his because I’ve outgrown mine…”

Haruka whipped his head up, staring at Makoto in shock.

“…I borrowed mine too,” he said, eyes wide. “This is my father’s yukata.”

“Eh? You too?!” blinked Makoto, his eyes sliding down the folds. Haru clenched the hem of his yukata a little tighter. Nagisa laughed.

“That explains it!” he said cheerfully. “They match because they are boring old fatherly yukatas!”

“You have zero tact, Nagisa-kun,” muttered Rei, clearing his throat loudly to get their attention. “Well, shall we head down to the festival? It has come to my attention that this festival is dedicated to the god of water, so with our captain’s permission, we should pay our respects at the shrine first.”

Haru nodded, his eyes carefully averted. Makoto smiled.

“Alright!” cried Nagisa. “Let’s _gooo!_ ”

* * *

Under Mikoshiba Seijuurou’s leadership, the Samezuka swim team gathered in front of the school building, then proceeded to the station to catch the first evening train to Iwatobi town. The moment they shuffled on board in search of empty seats, Aiichiro immediately secured two for his senpai and himself, receiving nothing but a grunt that he did his best to interpret as a thank you, even if nothing about Rin’s stiff posture or the way he glared down his reflection in the window suggested so.

After their short but painfully uncomfortable conversation in the locker room, Rin was glad to escape Nitori, only to return to him irritated and morose, tense as a cornered animal with gashes all over him that his nosy kouhai might dig his fingers into any minute. In all of Samezuka, Rin feared Nitori the most, whose kind, optimistic, and unwittingly earnest remarks cut him deepest. No matter how much, and in what ways Rin chose to keep him at bay, Nitori continued to show him warm, genuine enthusiasm that Rin felt completely unable to reciprocate… and now they were to spend a whole evening together, drifting from street to street at a stupid festival full of loud kids, asinine festival games, and obnoxiously red candy apples.

Rin’s face darkened at the thought. Long ago, his father once bought him and his sister a single candy apple at the festival, joking that they should share it because the two of them made up a single apple. That was the first time Rin felt resentment towards his name. _Rin. Gou._ _Ringo,_ or ‘apple’ in Japanese. Probably because Toraichi just knew they would turn out to be redheads like their mother. _What a terrible joke._

Rin clenched his jaw. His whole existence seemed like a terrible joke sometimes.

Fortunately for him, Nitori seemed to have forgotten the locker room conversation altogether. From what Rin could catch among the dusty cobwebs of his mind, all Nitori talked about was the food and games he was looking forward to. The more Rin listened to him, the more he sank into lukewarm apathy. _Fine,_ he told himself, _fine_. Let Nitori have his way. If things turned unbearable, Rin could just leave him behind, like always.

That thought, and the idea that Haru was probably cooped up at his house all alone were Rin’s only comforts during the train ride, which mercifully could not outlast his threadbare patience. At the next stop, they got off the train, and Nitori joined his side a moment later, the two of them heading out of Iwatobi Station.

It was Aiichiro’s first visit to Iwatobi, and his grin widened in glee at the sight of lanterns hung upon the fronts of buildings down the length of several streets, children gathering to play, and couples clad in handsome yukatas. Aiichiro sighed.

“I’m a fan of yukata,” he said to Rin, his eyes jumping from pattern to lovely pattern on a group of young women nearby. “I wish I had brought mine with me, but I forgot. Maybe next time..!”

Rin made no reply, his gaze lingering on a group of kids nearby.

“Senpai, I believe you’re familiar with this area,” risked Nitori.

“I guess,” replied Rin, still staring at the children, who were now loudly discussing how much money they got from their parents, and what they should spend it on. Rin could hear them talk of candy apples. His eyes dulled at once, hands clenching by his sides.

“Senpai? Everyone’s heading to the shrine,” he heard Nitori say. Rin bit his lip.

“Fine. Let’s go.”

He then turned away from Nitori, the latter struggling to keep up with him as Rin hurried after the others, soon falling into stride behind Uozumi and Minami. They marched on in silence. Nitori wrung his hands nervously, glancing to his senpai every now and again in the hopes of an opening, a single word or a small sideways glance he could latch onto, but Rin pretended not to notice, wishing every step of the way that he could simply disappear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> While I was taking drabble requests on Tumblr, some of which I posted on this account, I received a prompt whose end result was a rough, improvised draft for the conversation between Nagisa and Rei at the beginning of this chapter, so I decided to include it here. Enjoy!  
>    
>  _Reigisa and Concilliabule - A secret meeting of people who are hatching a plot._  
>     
> “The summer festival would be just the thing for Haru-chan to unwind, don’t you think, Rei-chan?” whispers Nagisa.
> 
> “Yes, I agree,” replies Rei, his tone hushed. “But Nagisa-kun, how are we going to entice Haruka-senpai? He’s rather reluctant when it comes to socials…”
> 
> “Simple,” murmurs Nagisa. “We’ll lure him with Mako-chan.”
> 
> “Eh?”
> 
> “We’ll tell him Mako-chan is coming and then he’ll want to tag along..!”
> 
> “But we haven’t invited Makoto-san yet…”
> 
> “It’ll be enough to say we did, trust me..!”
> 
> “Nagisa-kun…”
> 
> “Yes, Rei-chan?”
> 
> “Why are we whispering? We’re in my room.”
> 
> Nagisa shrugs. “It seemed appropriate for hatching a plot.”


	47. EPISODE 9: Hesitant Loosen Up! - Part 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rei and Nagisa were soon walking ahead of their small party, Rei trying to keep up with a chipper Nagisa while the others settled into a more casual pace behind them, if only because Makoto did his best to match Haru’s gradually slowing steps as Haruka sank deeper and deeper into the mire of his thoughts. Try though he might to stir them away from his last-minute invitation, along with all its ill suggestions about Makoto’s trustworthiness, his thoughts proved stubborn and dug their claws into the back of his mind, forcing him to rewind. Nagisa and Rei showed up just as he had turned the griddle on, demanding he abandon his plans for their sake, which was nothing unusual considering what a disaster his first trimester turned out to be. Haru had often been left out of their schemes until the very last moment, then thrown in as the final ingredient of some thickening plot, but as much as he hated surprises, being added last often spared him the trouble of tedious talk and wasted effort. For that, he could almost feel thankful… except tonight he learned that Makoto had also been part of the process.

Haru could not fathom how it had happened. When did Nagisa and Rei invite Makoto to the festival? What gap did they exploit to make their move on him without Haru noticing? It should have been impossible, especially nowadays, when he and Makoto had finally settled into a close-knit routine for two.

To convince himself, Haru ran through the motions in his head. Recently, each school morning began with Makoto waiting for him by the gate, then the two of them walking to school together. At school, they only saw Nagisa and Rei on their way to first period, or at lunch time, when the entire club ate on the roof together. Their lunch break was an hour long, which would have been ample time for mischief, but Haru could not remember ever leaving their circle during lunch, not even to use the toilet, so it couldn’t have happened between morning and the end of lunchtime. Next was sixth period, at the end of which he and Makoto headed over to practice, changed into their swimsuits, then trained together, as Haru had agreed to help Makoto improve his acceleration. Again, no opportunity for Nagisa or Rei to whisk Makoto away without him noticing. Finally, they always split into two groups after practice, the first-years heading to the train station while he and Makoto walked off towards the bay, practically in opposite directions… so how did they manage to get to him? Did they invite him by phone?

And most troublingly of all… why didn’t Makoto tell him?

These were the questions that pained Haruka as he drifted along with the others, oblivious that Makoto occasionally stole a worried glance at him on their way to the bay, racking his mind for ways to start a conversation he didn’t want to have in the slightest. The very idea of doubting anyone’s honesty shamed him, but the more Makoto thought about his last-second invitation to the festival, the less it made sense to his practical mind.

Nagisa and Rei showed up just before dinner time to tell him… how did Nagisa put it? That the entire week’s charade was a ‘clever ruse’ and Haru had agreed to come with them, but if Makoto accepted their words as truthful, then Haru’s invitation would have had to happen before his own, with Haru keeping silent about it for absolutely no reason. Makoto had no special occasion coming up that would have warranted a surprise get-together. He also thought himself a rather easy addition to social gatherings, so why did they spring this on him at the last minute? If anyone, he would have thought Haru to require such drastic measures, being difficult to convince of anything, and less sociable than any of them. However, if Nagisa and Rei did manage to persuade him in advance, why not break the news to Makoto earlier?

Makoto sighed. If they had allowed him even one day to get ready, he could have bought himself a yukata to wear. Not to mention it was common courtesy to leave your friends time to prepare for an event, which led him to another issue, that of Haru and his borrowed yukata. Makoto was no expert on clothes, but he fancied that the garment appeared a tad too large for Haru, and smelled faintly of lavender under the cologne, just like Makoto’s too-small yukata did when he pulled it out from the back of the wardrobe. If Haru did have time to prepare, why didn’t he at least air out his father’s yukata? As much as Haru liked to spare his energies from time to time, Makoto could not accuse him of being thoughtless or negligent… so how did the pieces of the puzzle fit together?

Makoto could only hope Haru held the answers to all his questions, and discussing the matter would bring both of them some peace of mind. From the way Haru’s forehead crinkled and his lips pursed tightly together, Makoto gleaned a great deal of uneasiness, so if he was to avoid upsetting Haru even further, he had to initiate as innocently and tactfully as possible.

He gave himself ten more seconds, then inhaled sharply through his nose. Haru’s eyes twitched to him instinctively.

_Is he going to—?_

“Haru..” began Makoto, his tone casual, but his eyes kept firmly ahead. Haru let out a small hum to encourage him. Makoto clasped his hands together. “I was just thinking that, what with Rei and Nagisa telling us so often this week to be on standby for the entire weekend, it seemed like none of us would end up going to the festival.”

Haru hummed again, this time in agreement. Makoto cracked an unsure smile.

“I— I suppose it’s nice, being able to go together after all,” he continued, treading lightly on the eggshells of his words. “Though, when I think of how it turned into an event with a dress code, I wish the invitation wouldn’t have been so sudden…”

Haru’s brow creased. _Sudden..?_

“What do you mean?” he asked, his expression and tone carefully guarded. Makoto turned his head slightly in embarrassment.

“I uh, I seem to have been invited at the last minute,” he explained, Haruka’s eyes widening as Makoto went on. “Just twenty minutes ago I was watching TV with the twins, when all of a sudden the doorbell rang and it was Rei and Nagisa in yukata, telling me to get dressed because everyone was waiting for me, including Haru…”

By the time he finished, Haruka’s eyes were threatening to pop out of their sockets.

“Are you serious?” he asked, his brow sharply quirked. Makoto blinked.

“Yeah.. that’s why I had to borrow my dad’s yukata. They left me so little time I couldn’t do anything else—”

“They did the same thing to me,” Haru interrupted him in a resentful tone. Now it was Makoto’s turn to stare at him in shock. “I was going to fry mackerel for dinner when they came and told me to get dressed because you were waiting by the gate..!”

“Eh?! So you weren’t invited before me?” blurted Makoto, half relieved, half mortified.

“Of course not,” frowned Haru, scolding Makoto with a hard glare at the mere suggestion that he would have kept a secret from him. Makoto grimaced.

“So they tricked us?!” he whined, his voice high-pitched enough to alert Rei and Nagisa that either an argument had broken out behind them, or something else was going awry.

“Is something wrong?” asked Rei, he and Nagisa turning their heads with alarmed looks. Haru tensed and turned his head archly, but Makoto cocked his head to the side with a forced smile.

“No, nothing’s wrong,” he replied at once.

Not having the courage to inquire any further, Rei and Nagisa turned their heads back to the path. Makoto peeled off his smile right after, he and Haruka shooting remarkably similar glares at the others’ backs.

“Weird,” muttered Haru, his eyes narrowed.

“Definitely weird,” whispered Makoto, his brow furrowed in displeasure as he turned back to Haruka. “Argh, I can’t believe this! I even told my family I couldn’t go to the festival this year so they stayed at home today to keep me company..!”

Haru pursed his lips. He gave Nagisa’s back another glare at the thought of the twins staying at home for nothing, then shot an extra glare at Rei for the slab of mackerel that missed its rendezvous with the griddle this evening.

“I would have rather stayed home,” he found himself saying, his stomach grumbling in discontent under the generous coverage of his father’s yukata. Makoto paused, a curious look on his face.

“You would have?” he asked, his voice still hushed. “But in that case.. why did you decide to come after all?”

Haru turned his head a little too quickly to hide the burn of his cheeks.

“They said you were waiting,” he said in a thick tone. “I didn’t really have a choice.”

Makoto laughed, his own cheeks every bit as seared.

“I suppose that’s how I felt too,” he said in a tender tone that coaxed Haru to glance at him one more time before turning away again, shoulders tense and one hand clenching on the hem of his yukata. Makoto lowered his eyes. Endearing as Haru could act when flustered, he seemed to grow more uneasy as they drew closer to the harbor. Makoto suppressed his smile as he tucked his hands behind his back.

“Are you okay, Haru?”

Haru hesitated. Was his discomfort so apparent? And even if he spoke, was there anything Makoto could do..?

“I’m fine,” he replied after a moment’s pause, but his eyes were carefully seeking Makoto’s. The other regarded him with a soft smile that seemed to prompt. Haru’s lips twitched. “I haven’t gone to a festival in years. There’s too many people and everyone is loud. It’s annoying,” he ended up saying, his eyes fixed on the other. Makoto’s smile widened a little, but Haru could detect no jest or malice about him.

“So you’re nervous?” asked Makoto, his tone gentle. Haru colored and looked away.

“Yeah..”

_So… can you fix that?_

A moment later, Makoto cocked his head with a grin.

“Well, maybe I can help,” he replied, his tone more confident than before. “My family and I have been going every year now, and the twins tend to run off on their own sometimes, so I’ve learned my way around,” he explained, waiting for Haru to look at him. Their eyes met. Makoto straightened his shoulders. “So whenever you feel nervous or need anything, you just stick close to me. Okay?”

“..Okay,” mumbled Haruka, and within a minute, the gap between them shrank a good deal, until the sleeves of their yukatas brushed together with every step.

Makoto noticed, but said nothing. In fact, if either Rei or Nagisa had dared to look back, they might have thought he looked strangely pleased.

* * *

The local shrine honoring the god of water stood on the other end of the bay, almost opposite to the Misagozaki shrine. To reach it, the swim club chose a road further away from the effervescent splendor of the harbor, not to be tempted and distracted from their goal. The road eventually culminated in a steep path of wide steps that led uphill to the back of the shrine, and it was there, at the vice-captain’s insistence that the captain reluctantly left Makoto’s side to join Rei’s so the two of them could lead the rest of the team. Makoto and Nagisa now walked side by side, just a few steps’ distance behind them. Makoto shot a meaningful glance at Nagisa.

“What’s up, Mako-chan?” asked Nagisa when he could no longer ignore those eyes, his grin stretched thin. Makoto’s eyelids sank.

“Was inviting the two of us at the last minute really necessary?” he replied, his tone lowered to soft whispers. Nagisa gave a strangled sound.

“Ma—aah, what do you mean, the two of you, don’t be silly, Mako-chan, ha ha… hah…” he stammered, but the more he stared into those large green eyes and that calm, amused smile sitting underneath, the more his playful scheme crumbled. In the end, Nagisa lowered his eyes with an awkward smile.

“So you found out, huh?”

“It wasn’t very hard,” replied Makoto. Nagisa peered up at him.

“Are you upset with us, Mako-chan..?” he asked, his voice small and worried. Makoto shook his head.

“Not really… I just thought it was a little strange. If I didn’t know better, I would say you two were up to something.”

Nagisa’s grin froze to his face, his neck boiling under the collar of his yukata.

“N-No such thing, jeez, Mako-chan, what makes you say that…”

“Just a hunch,” chuckled Makoto. Nagisa puffed out his cheeks at him.

“Mako-chan so mean..!” he jabbed right back, but Makoto only laughed more, until Nagisa could no longer resist laughing along with him. At the front, Haru turned back just enough to shoot Nagisa a look, then directed the ire of his silent glare at Rei, until the other acknowledged him with a nervous glance.

“Haruka-senpai..?” he breathed, squinting under the pressure. Haru’s eyes narrowed.

“You are conspiring against me,” he said, his tone hard and flat. Rei choked as he lifted a heavy hand to his face.

“N-Now, now, that is a very serious accusation, Haruka-senpai, please kindly refrain from making such false allegations…” he mumbled, pushing at his glasses with trembling fingers. Haru’s brows bent into an angry V.

“I’ll be watching you,” he promised and Rei swallowed, regretting he had asked the captain to join his side.

* * *

After more strained silence between the leaders and light-hearted laughter among the lower ranks, they finally reached the back of the shrine. Soon they joined the queue, then lined up in a neat row to ring the bell, throw their coins, and clap their hands in prayer. Rei stayed true to his earlier suggestion and prayed for victory, both in the relay and in his individual events. Nagisa wished fervently to go to nationals, and receive praise at the dinner table. Haru asked to find answers to his questions about himself and Rin… and Makoto, for the water to accept him, among other, more delicate desires that he trusted to the confidence of the god of water alone.

They then left as quietly as they had come, this time by way of the stairs on the other side, and having set off relatively early, they successfully evaded the entire Samezuka swim team.

* * *

From the moment they reached the toriis, the Iwatobi Swim Club trusted itself to the glow of the harbor for guidance. Following the lights, they soon entered the festival grounds from a connecting path, to be greeted by blazing yellow lanterns hung in handsome rows as far as the eye could see. Temporary wooden stalls with banners of all colors stood brightly lit from within, creating a luminous promenade filled to the brim with everything one could wish for, as long as what they wished for was squid and candy apples. The former came in all varieties, from treats and dishes to plush toys and key chains, until Nagisa lost count of all the stalls that sold squid in some shape or form.

“Wow, there’s squid everywhere, all right. Aaah, I want all of it,” he breathed, unable to contain his grin at all the possibilities his freshly won one thousand yen bill made all the more accessible. Rei fixed his glasses.

“Don’t be so shellfish,” he said, his expression perfectly stoic as he waited for Nagisa to react to his brilliant play on words, but the target got distracted the very next second, his eyes now hung on the stalls on the other side.

“Don’t ignore me!” spluttered Rei, but it was too late. Nagisa turned to Makoto and Haruka next, who were standing quite close as they looked around, Makoto with interest and Haru with dull uneasiness.

“So where should we start, Mako-chan?” asked Nagisa in an attempt to observe Rei’s wishes of letting Makoto shine, unaware that in doing so, he ironically ended up ignoring Rei himself. Rei glowered behind Nagisa as Makoto blinked at his sudden request for guidance, but he soon lifted his head again to look around, searching for something to catch his eye. Some ways away, people were filling a large inflatable pool with water, in preparation of the first major event. Makoto’s eyes widened in realization.

“Ah, I think Squid Catching Heaven is about to start,” he said as he pointed a finger at a couple of men, who were now tipping a large wooden basin over the pool to release a dozen live squid into the water. Nagisa looked absolutely thrilled, and Rei, the very opposite of thrilled.

“What kind of weird event is that?” he harped behind their backs, only to see Nagisa turn his head towards him with a hungry gaze. “And why are you looking at me like that..?”

Nagisa’s eyes flashed. “Rei-chan.”

Rei’s eyes narrowed. “I refuse.”

“You should participate.”

“No way! It sounds so… slimy!”

“Give it a try!”

“ _Absolutely not!_ ” shrieked Rei, his cheeks going from sickly green to bright red in a matter of seconds. Makoto suppressed his laughter. Beside him, Haru turned his head in indifference, his eyes falling onto a small pool of water filled with colorful balloons. His eyes dimmed. If it hadn’t been for Nagisa and Rei, he might have been soaking in his bathtub by now, safe, peaceful… and completely alone.

Makoto watched him in concern, the two of them quite forgotten by Nagisa and Rei.

“They’re starting any minute! Let’s get going!” Makoto heard Nagisa say, then watched him run off in a flurry of loud clicks of his geta.

“Ah! Wait up, Nagisa-kun!” Rei chased after him, his hands gripping his yukata to keep it from flaring up. Makoto turned back to Haru. His friend’s gaze still lingered on the water.

“Haru.” His voice fell small and soft, yet Haru’s eyes twitched to him at once. “We don’t want to lose sight of Nagisa and Rei.”

Haru lowered his head. It seemed just like the two of them to run off and leave him behind, always so volatile, always _together…_

Haru waited for the words to melt into bitter drops on his tongue, but he felt no twinge of jealousy this time, not even a hint of irritation. His shoulders relaxed as his next inhale brought a whiff of Makoto’s cologne. It reminded Haru of the ocean.

“Right…” he said as he turned in Makoto’s direction, then fell into step by his side, no longer missing the bathtub quite so much.

* * *

They managed to find a good spot just behind Nagisa and Rei, so for the next few minutes, they watched a team of men trying and failing to catch the squid floating about their ankles. A man with a headband tied around his forehead eventually managed to grab one, but the next moment, someone from the opposite team bumped into him, causing him to trip and drop the squid. Rei allowed himself a small laugh at the man’s expense.

“It looks fun,” breathed Nagisa as he turned to Rei with a flushed grin. “You can still join in, Rei-chan…”

“Not happening,” replied Rei, his eyes playfully averted. Nagisa careened his head towards the others in the back.

“What about you, Mako-chan?” he asked in a hopeful tone. Makoto colored, but Haru’s eyes widened at the thought of Makoto standing in the water, his legs spread and the wet juban clinging to his skin.

“It will be okay, Makoto,” he said, his eyes aglow as he stared the victim down in a burst of inspiration. “Just dive in and create an opening. But don’t try to catch the squid. _Be_ the squid. Let the squid accept you.”

Nagisa now watched them with growing interest, grinning at the red sears of Makoto’s ears. Behind him, Rei gurgled indignantly.

“You are speaking complete nonsense, Haruka-senpai!” he harped from behind Nagisa. “What could Makoto-san possibly gain from being accepted by a squid?!”

“Yeah, I’ll pass,” said Makoto with a nervous laugh. Haru frowned, but the next moment, the thought of entering Squid Catching Heaven was wiped from their minds altogether when a familiar voice behind them rang out,

“Hey, you’re all here after all!”

They spun around in synch, to find themselves face to face with Kou and Chigusa clad in bright and cheerful yukatas, each holding a fried squid fresh from the grill of a nearby stall.

“It’s Kou-chan!” cried Nagisa. Kou and Chigusa curtsied.

“H-Hello,” said Chigusa with a smile, stepping closer with Kou to get a good look at the famous swim team, all of them rather attractive and well-built even under those loose yukatas. _What I wouldn’t give to have a boyish name so I could join them_ , thought Chigusa, who until now had to contend herself with Kou’s stories and photos of the training camp. She had yet to decide which one was her favorite. Now was her chance, while the photographer herself beamed proudly beside her friend, glad to see some friendly faces while she waited patiently for Onii-chan and Seijuurou to appear.

“Ah, you’re wearing yukata too! Now we _all_ match!” Nagisa pointed out to Rei’s delight, the two of them staring at the girls with approval. Haru politely checked out the patterns of their yukata, thinking them pleasant enough. Makoto smiled at the girls.

“You both look cute,” he said cheerfully, admiring their elaborate hairdos. Haru quirked a sharp brow at him. Nagisa and Rei looked rather shocked, but Chigusa and Kou exchanged excited glances, Chigusa’s face tinted pink with pleasure.

“You mean just our yukata?” she asked Makoto slyly. He let out an awkward laugh.

“Not exactly…” he managed to say with flushed cheeks. Haru lowered his head and pursed his lips, no longer finding the patterns quite so pleasant. Rei cleared his throat.

“Well then, should we go and have something to eat?” he turned to his team with hopeful looks, having coveted Kou-san’s fried squid since her sudden appearance, ashamed though he was at the thought.

“That would be great,” replied Makoto, who had practically walked out on a fresh-cooked meal to attend the festival. Haru stole a glance at him.

“I recommend the squid paella,” said Chigusa, speaking from happy experience.

“Sounds delicious!” said Nagisa, thoroughly excited at the promise of food at last. “Let’s all go and have some!”

“Oh, sorry but we can’t,” replied Kou. “The Squid Ink Calligraphy Contest is about to start.”

“The Calligraphy Club will be participating!” added Chigusa, her voice warm with pride as a member of the club, having come partly to cheer for her fellow calligraphers. Makoto wished them luck with all his heart. Haruka hummed.

“Okay, bye!” waved Nagisa as the girls left to watch the contest. Makoto waved too, then turned to his friends with a smile, waiting a few seconds to see if Rei might take charge. The vice-captain, however, seemed lost in abundance, his eyes jumping from stall to stall in fretful indecision. Makoto’s face softened.

“So, what do you guys want to eat?” he asked, his tone no longer so tentative and guilt-laced as it used to be. Nagisa and Rei perked up at once and turned to him, the latter cupping his chin between his fingers.

“We have to start with fried squid!” declared Nagisa.

“I think I want squid tempura,” said Rei, his brow furrowed in search of the perfect starter.

“Let’s look around then,” replied Makoto.

“Oh, wait, I could go for some paella, too!” said Nagisa. Makoto shook his head with a laugh.

“Yes, well, let’s go through the stalls first and then decide, alright?”

“Okay! Let’s _gooo!_ ” cheered Nagisa, who pivoted on the heels of his geta, then broke into a light jog down the road. Rei let out a shriek.

“W-Wait up, Nagisa-kun, stop running off everywhere!” he cried as he rushed after him.

Haru scowled at their shrinking silhouettes. Would he and Makoto have to spend the whole night doing nothing else but chase after them? _Annoying…_

“Shall we follow them, Haru?” said Makoto, taking a small step in their direction to nudge Haruka out of his thoughts. He turned his head to Makoto with a sour expression. Makoto flashed him a soothing smile.

“What would _you_ like to eat?” he asked next, his voice tender. Haru’s frown deepened.

“Mackerel,” he replied at once, evidently offended. Makoto laughed.

“I shouldn’t have asked,” he replied, but his tone remained tender all the same. “I can make no promises, but I’ll keep my eyes open. If there is a stall that has it, I’m sure we’ll find it. Okay?”

“..Okay,” replied Haru.

A moment later, he joined Makoto’s side again in the hopeless pursuit of Nagisa, Rei, and something acceptable to eat, keeping his pace slow and comfortable not to catch up with his troublesome kouhai _too_ soon.

* * *

Meanwhile, at the local shrine, Captain Mikoshiba led the Samezuka swim team’s prayers himself, then finished with a reverent bow of his head. Once his men bowed in unison, they finally retired from the shrine to let other visitors pray to the god of water as well. Before leaving, however, Seijuurou guided his team over to a nearby wall of lanterns hung from wooden shelves. There he did a head count one last time, his features relaxing once everyone had been accounted for. He straightened, then slapped his hands on his hips with a smirk. His troops turned to him with eager looks.

“Okay, you’re all dismissed!” said Mikoshiba. “You’re free to walk around now. However, don’t get into any trouble, and remember that our last train leaves at eleven, so be back at the station by then, or else be prepared to stay the night!”

“ _Yes, sir!_ ” replied his team in unison.

Within a minute, the group broke into smaller clusters, drifting off into a dozen promising directions. Rin was the only one who remained in place, half hoping Nitori would abandon him for idling too long, but no amount of looking away could persuade the other to opt for more suitable companions. For someone who seemed soft and caring by nature, Nitori turned out to be as stubborn as an ox, and just this once, Rin felt too tired to argue with him.

“Senpai, let’s look around,” suggested Aiichiro with a smile.

Rin shrugged his shoulders in reply, turning towards the torii without a word. Aiichiro blinked. Did his senpai have something in mind to take the lead so decidedly? There was only one way to find out.

“Wait for me!” he cried as he hurried after him and past Mikoshiba Seijuurou, who had since taken out his phone to text Kou-san, the grin on his face so wide his cheeks were aching.

* * *

Back at the festival, Nagisa soon stopped in front of a stall to wait for Rei. When his friend caught up, they began to move from vendor to vendor, hoping to find the perfect appetizer for their festival feast.

At first, they kept their pace slow to allow Makoto and Haru to catch up to them. However, what started out as mere consideration for the others soon became a necessary of the selection process, for neither could make up their mind, and continued arguing about the ideal starter.

“Squid _burgers,_ Rei-chan!” breathed Nagisa when they reached another stall, convinced he now had a winner in the form of plump burgers nestled in light blue squid-print wrappers.

“I’m more interested in trying out squid and chips,” replied Rei without even looking, his eyes already set on the next stall in their path. His stomach churned relentlessly with each minute of fruitless bargaining with Nagisa. _If only Makoto-san could hurry, he would settle this in an instant,_ he found himself thinking, then flushed at the idea. Was he growing indecisive and too reliant on Makoto-san? Was it proper for a vice-captain to seek help and guidance from others the way he did? And most importantly… was it proper to impose swim club hierarchy on his group of friends on a night when they were all trying to forget about swimming?

 _Probably not,_ concluded Rei, careening his head towards where he hoped Makoto and Haruka would be following them, but the two of them inched forward at a snail’s pace for no discernible reason. Tracing Rei’s gaze, Nagisa turned his head too, finally spotting a patch of juniper green behind another couple. He lifted an arm to wave.

“Try not to get lost, you guys!” he called out to them.

“We’re coming!” replied Makoto with a wave of his hand.

With Makoto and Haruka accounted for, Rei turned his head back to the next stall.

He then froze in horror.

His jaw dropped, but his shriveled tongue could make no sound. Just a few meters ahead, drifting among smiling couples and flocks of laughing children was Matsuoka Rin, followed around by a shorter gray-haired boy Rei could just barely place as the Samezuka captain’s right hand man… and the two of them were heading _his_ way.

Seized by panic, all Rei could do was blindly jam his elbow backwards. He accidentally dug into Nagisa’s side, who cringed with a small yelp.

“What’s wrong, Rei-chan?” he hissed as he turned around, then grimaced as though he had been struck in the face. “ _Rin-chan?!_ ”

Rin and Nitori were getting closer. A single vein pulsed across Rei’s temple.

“This is an awful time for him to show up,” he whispered, his voice rasping dry.

“The worst time ever,” agreed Nagisa, his own temples slick with sweat.

“Is something wrong?” came Makoto’s voice from behind them, spooking Rei and Nagisa with the intensity of a horror movie jump scare in the middle of the night. They screeched as their feet left the ground for a good second or two, but once they hit the ground, they whirled around to face their friends with last-minute grins slapped on their faces.

“Aa—aaah, n-no, nothing’s wrong, Rei-chan and I were just wondering how many bowls of squid we could eat in one night,” stammered Nagisa, his skin steaming under his yukata. Makoto stared at them in surprise. Haru quirked his brow.

“You’re going to eat that much?” he asked as two high-schoolers came squeezing past a smaller crowd just a few meters away.

“Let’s try a shooting game!” came a high-pitched voice from nearby, as loud and chipper as a young boy’s and reminding Haru of the way Nagisa tended to nag Rei.

“I’m not interested,” followed a sharp reply, which reminded him of someone else entirely. Haru’s brow creased in confusion as he turned his head, only for Nagisa to dive in front of him with his arms raised, in a desperate attempt to steal Haru’s attention back.

“Oh—Haaa, I think I’ll go and buy squid burgers for everyone!” cried Nagisa with his hands still up in the air, grasping at the broken strands of his thoughts, all of them shattered by Rin’s appearance.

“ _How thoughtful of you, Nagisa-kun!_ ” barked Rei, his shoulders jumping stiffly with each word as he faintly wondered if Nagisa was going to use _his_ one thousand yen to pay for the food.

Makoto quirked a brow at him, his expression flat. Haru, confused, kept his eyes on Nagisa.

“Hold on!” cried Nagisa, one arm swaying slightly in the air, then finally swinging downwards to point past Haruka, in a direction that Nagisa deemed safe from Rin. “Can you wait for us in the rest area over there?!”

“Uh, I don’t want a squid burger,” said Makoto in an apologetic tone.

Rei let out a startled yelp. Nagisa could feel his forehead burn.

“Um, yeah, but _we_ do…!” he pleaded, shooting a glance at Haru, then scrunching his left eye shut in a hard wink at Makoto. Makoto stared at him perplexed. Nagisa winked again, and again, and again, his face frozen in a tight grin as Rei’s eyes darted from Makoto to Haruka in alarm.

Just as both began to despair, understanding finally dawned on Makoto’s face. His features smoothed into a light smile and he turned to Haruka at once, expression perfectly serene.

“Let’s go then, Haru. We need to find a table for all four of us,” he said softly, turning around to coax his friend along. Haru’s shoulders slackened a little.

“Okay,” he mumbled, turning around to follow Makoto. A few steps later, they walked side by side, leaving Rei and Nagisa behind.

“Are they planning something?” whispered Haru once they put some distance between themselves and the others, his tone anxious. Makoto shrugged, but his eyes remained calm.

“Maybe,” he said in a gentle tone, “but whatever it is, I’m sure we’ll be fine as long as we stick together. Let’s just find a table for now and sit down, okay?”

“Okay,” replied Haruka.

Trusting their course to Makoto, he soon found himself safely seated opposite him under one of the tents, elbows on top and their knees brushing together in the cramped space underneath their narrow table.

“There isn’t much room..” mumbled Makoto, though he made no effort to move his legs.

“Yeah,” said Haru, his cheeks flushed as his foot knocked softly against Makoto’s.

* * *

The moment Haru and Makoto disappeared from view, Nagisa and Rei collapsed in a relieved heap, fingers trembling over their buckled knees.

“I thought Kou-chan said Rin-chan wasn’t coming to the festival,” moaned Nagisa.

“I believe she only said Rin-senpai didn’t answer her messages, which is not exactly the same thing,” replied Rei. Nagisa’s lips twitched into a worried frown.

“If Rin-chan stays too long at the festival, he and Haru-chan might bump into each other.”

“It is a possibility, and it would defeat the purpose of inviting Haruka-senpai to the festival to take his mind off the tournament,” said Rei, his brow creasing woefully at the thought. “Should the two of them meet, it might even achieve the opposite effect…”

“ _Eh?!_ But, if Haru-chan gets upset again, he might ditch us at regionals!” whined Nagisa, his fingers curling into claws over his knees.

“That would be the worst case scenario, yes.”

“That’s no good… I want Haru-chan to swim with us again.”

“That is my wish, too,” replied Rei, his eyes seeking Nagisa’s. Nagisa bit his lip.

“Then we have to make sure they don’t meet,” he said, his brow furrowed in determination.

“I believe so,” agreed Rei.

The next moment, a small but heavy hand slammed down on his shoulder.

“Rei-chan. You go and follow Rin-chan,” said Nagisa with flashing eyes.

“Huh?!” blurted Rei, his shoulder tingling under Nagisa’s grip.

“You follow him and let me know where he is, so we can lead Haru-chan away from him!” said Nagisa. His free hand instinctively sank to his kinchaku, pressing against the hard bulge of his phone. Rei huffed as he folded his arms over his chest.

“Absolutely not! It’s impossible for me to go!”

“Eh?! _Why?_ ” yelped Nagisa.

“Because Haruka-senpai already suspects me!” cried Rei, his face frightfully pale. “He told me he would be watching my every move, so you will have to go in my place, Nagisa-kun!”

“ _Me?!_ But I can’t go either because Mako-chan is onto me!” whined Nagisa.

Just when he thought they had reached a stalemate, Rei’s eyes lit up with hope.

“Then it’s simple! We’ll send _Makoto-san_ after Rin-senpai!” replied, his lips widening in a grin at his excellent solution. Nagisa stared at him wide-eyed.

“Rei-chan, that’s even _worse!_ ” he groused, his hand flying off Rei’s shoulder to clench in front of him. Rei choked.

“What is so wrong about sending Makoto-san on this mission?” he argued, even calling his fingers for help in counting down the pros of his idea to Nagisa. “He knows what Rin-senpai looks like, he’s a reliable messenger, and he’s a basic swim club member so he has to do whatever his vice-captain tells him, right?” he continued, but something about the way Nagisa slapped a hand on his cheek, then dragged down his nails until they left red marks told Rei there might be a flaw in his reasoning after all.

“You are hopeless, Rei-chan,” replied Nagisa, his expression flatter than a steamrolled crepe. “Don’t you realize Mako-chan has a very important job to do right now?”

“What do you mean?” asked Rei, his brow arched. Nagisa let out an exasperated sigh.

“He’s the one who’s leading Haru-chan around! Haru-chan listens to Mako-chan and sticks to him like glue, so if you take Mako-chan away, Haru-chan will get suspicious and start asking why he can’t spend time with his best friend! Is that what you want, Rei-chan, do you want Haru-chan’s death glare following you around all night?!”

“N-No, of course not!” stammered Rei, his face buried in his trembling hands.

A moment later, Nagisa’s hand slammed down on his shoulder again.

“Then go and follow Rin-chan right now, while I distract Haru-chan and Mako-chan with food!” said Nagisa, his eyes shimmering with enthusiasm that was completely lost on Rei. He lowered his hands, his eyes narrowed in suspicion.

“Nagisa-kun, I still don’t see why it can’t be you who—”

“ _O-KAY!_ ” cried Nagisa as he sprung to his feet, pointing a triumphant finger at the sky. “Hop to it, Detective Rei-chan!”

Rei straightened himself with a sigh. If he didn’t know better, he would have thought Nagisa was enjoying the situation.


	48. EPISODE 9: Hesitant Loosen Up! - Part 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If Rei was to track Rin for the rest of the night, he had no choice but to take off in the direction they had last seen him, leaving Nagisa with the burden of keeping their seniors content and oblivious for the rest of the evening all by himself. When viewed in such a light, Rei’s errand seemed a lot less daunting in comparison. All he had to do was stay reasonably hidden while on the move, and message Nagisa at regular intervals of Rin’s whereabouts.

_How hard could that be?_

He soon caught up with Rin and threw himself behind the nearest booth. Rin failed to notice, but Rei did manage to draw the attention of two young boys and a little girl, who now looked to him wide-eyed, the snacks in their hands quite forgotten.

Rei quirked a brow at them, but otherwise didn’t mind his audience. After a moment’s consideration, all he did in acknowledgement of their presence was lift a finger, tapping it lightly against his lips to plead silence. They nodded wordlessly. Rei closed his eyes in contentment, one hand curling to his elbow as the other pressed his glasses back.

His heart thumped in excitement. Physically, he was perfectly ready. All he was missing now was the proper mood.

“The target’s height is estimated at one-hundred and seventy-seven centimeters,” he murmured to himself, the kids listening in awe. “His weight is estimated at sixty-eight kilograms. He has red hair and pointed teeth for reasons unknown. Commence pursuit.”

“Good luck, Onii-chan,” whispered the youngest, her free hand curled to her lips to give her small voice more oomph. Rei gave her a brave nod, then flattened himself against the side of the booth, sticking his head out slightly to check Rin’s position. He then dashed off towards the next stall for cover. He glanced back at the children one more time, to see that they had resumed eating their food in eager anticipation of something exciting to watch. Rei poked his head out again. His next cover turned out to be a stall that sold brightly colored plastic masks hanging from wooden shelves. Rin had just passed them without a single glance, the gray-haired boy still walking by his side with his hands clasped behind his back.

“I can’t believe someone has already won the Monoika…” Rei heard the boy say to Rin as they walked on towards the next attraction. “Do you think any of the other shooting stalls might have it, Senpai?”

Rin listened half-heartedly, Nitori’s words coming in one ear and straight out the other, but inattentive as he seemed, his eyes flashed alertly at passersby, as though any of them could be an unwanted meeting he needed to avoid.

Rei made his way carefully around the corner, his eyes fixed on his target.

Rin felt his hair bristle on the back of his neck. He whipped his head around with an aggressive glare. A man stood by the stall they had just passed, hands folded into the sleeves of his yukata and his face completely covered by a mask. Only the spiky tips of his hair poked above the plastic rim, shimmering in a thousand odd shades under the obnoxious yellow light of the lanterns. Rin glared at the mask. _What a cheap looking piece of junk…_

Aiichiro turned his head as well, but saw little more than some stranger having fun with a carnival mask. “Is something wrong?”

“No, it’s nothing,” replied Rin with a scratch at the nape of his neck, as though his nails could scrape off that paranoid itch if he just dug them deep enough. He gave the stranger one more annoyed look, then turned back towards the path, his lips tightly pursed.

Rei’s shoulders slumped in relief. A stall away, the little girl from earlier clapped her hands in appreciation of his smooth maneuver.

“Not bad,” noted Rei with a smug smirk as he plucked the mask off with a light twang of its elastic string. The vendor squinted at him as he pointed at the mask.

“That’ll be five hundred yen,” he said in a flat tone.

“A worthy investment,” replied Rei.

* * *

The very moment Rei was gone, Nagisa found himself coveting the role of the detective as it dawned on him that he was now quite alone in his predicament, with no one to guide him or argue about what food to buy for his friends. Making decisions always seemed easier when he had someone to bounce his ideas off of, and there was no better candidate in the world than Rei, but it was too late for regret. If Nagisa wanted Haru-chan safe and happy, he had to make haste, and pondering his choices, he now thanked his past self for having the brilliant foresight to trick Rei into a bet his friend had no chance of winning.

Just as Rei had suspected, his one thousand yen made a very significant contribution to the swim club’s festival menu in the form of two squid burgers, while the rest of the feast was bought at Nagisa’s expense, who decided to go all out, getting two of everything just to be safe. Once he found the stall he had been looking for, he left with two servings of squid paella, packed into a single plastic container with two pairs of disposable chopsticks; a large roast corn on the cob cut into halves; two ruby-red candy apples on a tray; a large rice-stuffed squid cut into six slices; two fried squid on a stick, laid carefully on another tray, and lastly, a third one to eat on the go. By the time Nagisa took the last tray, then opened his mouth wide for the vendor to stick the third squid between his teeth, his arms were trembling under the weight. Indeed, Nagisa hardly knew how he managed to carry all of it to his friends without squashing anything.

Haru and Makoto thought it equally miraculous, staring in disbelief as Nagisa unloaded his cargo in front of them. He set everything neatly between them, covering the whole table in the process.

“You’ve bought a lot of food…” mumbled Makoto as Nagisa slid the last tray in its place, at which point he could finally afford the liberty of releasing the fried squid he had been holding in his mouth, grabbing hold of its stick as one properly ought. He took a huge victory bite that smeared his cheeks with grease and bits of squid. Makoto quirked his brow.

“Um, where’s Rei?” he asked, looking around. Nagisa broke into an awkward grin.

“Oh, uh… He ran into someone and they’re walking around the festival together,” he replied, taking another bite of his squid to keep his mouth busy. Haru tensed, then lifted his head to look at Nagisa as a strange thought entered his head.

“Who did he run into?” he asked with narrowed eyes.

The question made Nagisa choke on his mouthful of squid. Makoto panicked, but snapped out of it in time and reached up to give Nagisa’s back a few firm taps. Nagisa coughed. Haru pursed his lips in wait.

“Um, he didn’t say..” coughed Nagisa, his voice hoarse and slimy with squid. Haru’s brow creased in annoyance.

“Didn’t you see who it was?” he pressed on, his arms folded over the table. Nagisa colored in discomfort.

“Well, yeah, but I forgot what they looked like, he he.. eh…” he replied, now taking only a slight nibble of his squid in fear of what might come next. Haru’s eyes widened.

“You are also conspiring against me,” he breathed, his voice thick with shock. Nagisa balked.

“N-Now, now, Haru-chan, what makes you say that..?” he stammered with a smile fit for a nervous breakdown. Haru narrowed his eyes again.

“For one thing, you refuse to tell us who Rei ran into,” he began, pausing for a second to lift a finger to point at Makoto. “You’re making Makoto worried.”

“Um, Haru, I’m not particularly—”

“And for another,” Haru continued, ignoring him, “you didn’t bring drinks.”

Nagisa stared at him.

“What…?”

“You didn’t bring drinks,” repeated Haru, as if Nagisa had been born with a second pair of arms he cruelly refused to load with bottles and soda cans to keep Haru hydrated. Nagisa opened his mouth, but found himself absolutely speechless. Makoto gave Haru a flat look. Haru turned his head with a pout.

“I’ll go and buy some,” he added, rising from his seat to look for a vending machine.

“ _Waaah!_ ” cried Nagisa. It was Haru’s turn to balk. He stopped in his tracks to stare. Nagisa lifted his hands. “You stay here, Haru-chan! I’ll go, I’m the one who forgot after all…”

“Nice try, but you can’t go. You are up to something,” replied Haru in a dismissive tone, propping his hands on the table to lean towards Nagisa, whose yukata was slowly turning into a sauna under the heat of Haruka’s glare.

“What if I went with him?” offered Makoto, flashing a soothing smile at Nagisa, then rising from his seat to facilitate Haru’s decision. “I could help carry the drinks back,” he added in a kind tone.

Though Nagisa’s lips twitched into a smile at the offer, he was hesitant to accept Makoto’s company. On the one hand, his friend could prove a useful ally, but on the other, could Nagisa truly expect Makoto to keep his best friend in the dark for the rest of the evening?

“T-That’s very kind of you, Mako-chan,” said Nagisa with a troubled laugh, “but if you come with me, then Haru-chan will have to stay here all by himself, to guard the table while you and I disappear for who knows how long…” he went on, his eyes darting to Haruka as he shimmied slightly towards Makoto, until their arms bumped together.

He struck gold. His words gave Haru obvious pause, who now found himself torn between letting Nagisa go to plot against him unrestrained, and relinquishing Makoto for an uncertain period of time, with the added risk of Nagisa claiming him for his own nefarious schemes. Haru bit his lip, his brow furrowed in thought of a better alternative.

“Then I’ll go with you and Makoto stays,” he said after a moment of consideration, pushing himself away from the table. Nagisa swallowed. The time for desperate measures had come, and he had no choice but to trust his instincts.

“But, Haru-chan,” he replied, forcing as innocent a smile as possible, “that would mean leaving Mako-chan to stay here all alone and defenseless!”

“Eh?” blinked Makoto. Even Haru quirked a brow.

“If we leave him, Mako-chan will be forced to sit at this table in plain sight, drawing the attention of all the girls and guys with his wide shoulders and nice yukata!”

“Eh?!” cried Makoto, his ears turning beet red. Haru on the other hand was turning a sickly shade of white.

“Yeah!” pressed Nagisa, one hand shooting outward to point at a couple of high school girls standing by a stall. “I bet those girls are checking him out _right now!_ ”

Noticing the attention directed at them, the girls gave the three boys a look. They then turned to each other, one whispering in the other’s ear to make her friend burst out in giggles. Makoto buried his face in his hands. Haru’s face stiffened into a grimace.

“Makoto, you and I go,” he declared as he slipped away from his bench, one arm shooting out to grab and press down on Nagisa’s shoulder, until he collapsed onto the bench in Haru’s place. “Nagisa stays.”

“B-But Haru-chan—” whimpered Nagisa, rising from his seat only to be pushed back down again as Haru walked around him to Makoto’s side.

“I am the captain so you have to do what I say,” said Haruka, his lips curling into a small smile at his first deliberate abuse of higher rank. Nagisa scowled at him.

“That’s unfair, Haru-chan! You can’t just impose swim club hierarchy on your friends during downtime!” he whined. Haru shrugged.

“I just did,” he replied as he reached out a hand towards Makoto, to pinch up and tug on a fold of his yukata sleeve. “Let’s go, Makoto.”

“Oh, alright,” replied Makoto. “Sorry, Nagisa.”

He then pushed himself away from the bench to follow Haru in his search for the nearest vending machine. Nagisa puffed his cheeks at their backs, hopelessly stuck at the table.

“I’m going to eat all the food while you’re gone!” he threatened loudly, but it was no use. In another moment, Haru and Makoto disappeared from his sight completely. Nagisa huffed. The girls he had pointed at now giggled behind his back.

The next moment, his phone jingled to announce a new message from Rei. Nagisa dug it out of his kinchaku with trembling fingers.

_From: Rei-chan_

_The target has stopped to purchase consumables at a stall close to the beach. Is everything going well?_

Nagisa made a sickly frown as he typed his response.

_To: Rei-chan_

_Roger. Everything is going well!_

He hit _Send_ , then sank his phone back into his kinchaku. He sincerely hoped Haru and Makoto would be back soon, but just to make good on his threat, he picked up one of the squid burgers and began wolfing it down with the voracity of a disappointed child. After a few bites, he shot a glare at the girls with puffed cheeks, who turned their heads haughtily as they walked off to the next stall to buy key chains.

* * *

Once Haru and Makoto managed to leave Nagisa behind, Haru turned to his friend with guarded features, his hands tucked into the folds of his sleeves.

“I don’t know where to buy drinks,” he owned, his eyes hooked into Makoto’s. The other suppressed a laugh.

“I think there’s a vending machine around the corner,” he replied, pointing discreetly to a row of smaller buildings behind the stalls. “This way, Haru.”

“Okay,” said Haruka, inching closer to Makoto.

They walked around a few stalls offering assorted squid merchandise, until they finally spotted a drink vending machine by the wall of a family house with a wooden garage. Unlike the bustling promenade, there were hardly any visitors around, but Haru still pulled closer to Makoto’s side with every step until they reached the machine.

They stopped in front of it, puzzled by the generous selection of drinks available.

“What shall we get, Haru?” asked Makoto with a smile. Haru shrugged.

“Water,” he replied.

He even lifted a hand to press the button, but the next moment, he was interrupted in the most unexpected way.

“Haruka-senpai and Makoto-senpai?” he heard a familiar voice behind his back.

He and Makoto spun around, to find Kou and Captain Mikoshiba standing a few feet away, the two having spotted Makoto and Haru on their way to the dark enclosure, then followed them out of curiosity. Seijuurou’s hands were full, one grasping the stick of a half-eaten cotton candy as the other balanced a tray of chocolate bananas and candy apples, while Kou’s arms were taken up by a large plush squid that seemed divided clean in half by its color scheme, the right side white with a round black eye, and the left side light blue with a round red eye. Makoto could have sworn he had seen that design somewhere before. Haru looked a lot less certain.

“Kou-chan… Captain Mikoshiba..! Good evening,” said Makoto, bowing his head in greeting. Haru gave them a near-unperceivable nod of the head. Seijuurou grinned.

“At ease, Tachibana,” he replied with a slight wag of his cotton candy. “We were just passing by and saw you, so we thought we’d say hello. You’re getting drinks, I see!”

“Yeah, we promised to bring some back to our table,” replied Makoto. Haru let out a small huff, turning his head pointedly towards the bottles and cans waiting inside.

“I see,” replied Kou, glancing from the boys to Seijuurou, who shrugged his shoulders benignly. Kou took a deep breath as she turned back to the others. “Oh, by the way, have you seen my brother anywhere?”

Haru’s head whipped back to them at once, eyes wide. Makoto paled.

“Rin…?” they mumbled in unison, flinching as they turned to stare at each other, then back to Kou. She flashed them a troubled smile. Seijuurou nodded.

“Matsuoka came here with the swim team to visit the shrine,” he explained to them. “He then walked down to the harbor like everyone else, but we can’t seem to find him anywhere.”

“Oh..! Ah, we haven’t seen him,” replied Makoto with an uneasy grin.

Kou’s smile wilted in an instant, her shoulders drooping. A twinge of guilt twisted Makoto’s heart.

“But, if we do see him, we will let you know,” he added, his expression a little warmer, and his concern now genuine. Kou perked up at once. Seijuurou grinned.

“Thanks, Tachibana, Nanase-kun,” he replied, nodding his head to Haru, who turned his head with a reserved frown. “We will trouble you two no longer. Unless…” continued Seijuurou, turning back to Kou. “Would you like a drink, Kou-san?”

“Hmm… maybe some green tea,” replied Kou, hoisting her Monoika on one arm as the other searched for her kinchaku.

Before she could find her purse, Makoto turned around to punch in Kou’s order, using his spare change to get a can of green tea for her. She was still gathering her coins when Makoto stepped over with her drink. Kou giggled in reply, then held out her fist, wiggling it until Makoto obediently reached out his other hand to receive the coins in exchange for the tea. Kou plucked it from his fingers with a sweet smile. Haru pursed his lips.

“Thank you, Makoto-senpai,” she chirped as Makoto reached over to open the can for her, sparing her from another balancing act. Haru turned his head archly. “See you later!”

After a curtsy from her and a grateful nod from Seijuurou, the two of them turned around to head back to the promenade. Makoto sighed in relief. He then stepped back to Haru, finding his friend deep in thought. Makoto’s heart jolted in fear.

“Are you okay, Haru?” he asked, his tone low and gentle. Haru blinked.

“I’m fine,” he replied, his expression distant. “I was just thinking.. that this explains it.”

“Explains what?” asked Makoto, his brow quirked.

“The voice,” said Haru. “I heard a voice, just before Nagisa jumped in front of me and started yelling about squid burgers. It sounded just like Rin.”

“Maybe it was,” allowed Makoto with a heavy heart. The next moment, he flinched. “Could it be that Rei is walking around with Rin, then? If Nagisa tried to distract you from Rin, maybe Rei went off to distract Rin for him.”

Haru stared at him confused.

“Why would they do that?”

Makoto lowered his head, his features somber.

“Maybe they wanted to protect you,” he said quietly, his fist slowly clenching around Kou’s change. Haru’s eyes widened. “We all saw how upset he made you at the tournament, how much.. how much Rin hurt you. Maybe Nagisa and Rei just wanted to keep you safe from him,” finished Makoto, unable to look at Haruka as his free hand wringed the hem of his sleeve.

Haru bit his lip. Was everyone really worried about him?

“Makoto..” he said, his tone tentative.

His friend lifted his head just barely. Haru’s lips twitched.

“Can we pretend nothing happened just now?”

Makoto stared at him surprised, but his features soon melted into a kind smile.

“You don’t want to spoil their hard work?”

Haru shook his head. Makoto chuckled.

“We’ll let them protect you a little longer, then,” he replied, his tone gentle. Haru’s posture relaxed. Makoto cocked his head.

“We’ll go back, and if Rei doesn’t come back in half an hour, we’ll talk to Nagisa. It would be a shame if they had to spend the rest of the evening apart,” he went on with an amused grin. “After all, they seem very fond of each other.”

Haru tensed and turned his head, his cheeks coloring.

“They are obnoxious.”

Makoto laughed.

“They can be a bit wild at times, but I think they mean well.”

Haru risked a peek at him. Makoto cocked his head again.

“Shall we get some drinks now, Haru?”

“Oh… right,” replied Haruka, looking away as he dug some change out of his wallet.

He soon bought himself a bottle of water, a can of soda for Nagisa, one more for Rei, and an orange drink for Makoto. Once his friend gave him Kou’s coins in exchange for the drink, Haru unscrewed the cap of his bottle to take a long sip. Makoto’s features hardened a little.

“Will you be alright, Haru?” he asked, his tone worried. Haru arched his brow. “Even if we pretend we didn’t hear anything, you will still know Rin is here, and that thought will follow you around. Will you be alright..?”

Haru’s eyes fell to the ground, but a moment later, he lifted his head and nodded.

“I’ll be fine,” he said in a firm tone, then seemed to pause. “After all, Makoto is with me. You said I’d be fine as long as I stayed close, right..?”

Makoto stared at him baffled, then let out a laugh, warm and light and every bit as searing as the sun. Haru turned his head, his cheeks tingling where it scorched him.

“I did,” replied Makoto, his grin wide, even childish in unrestrained joy. “Well, let’s go back then, Haru,” he said, reaching out to relieve Haru of Nagisa’s soda. Haru passed it to him.

For the rest of their walk back, the two of them drew as close to each other as they could without tangling, their sleeves crumpling together in the effort. Makoto kept his eyes on the road and Haru on the drinks in his hands, hoping the purchase would make up for having spoiled Nagisa’s secret.

* * *

“ _There_ you two are!” whined Nagisa when Makoto and Haruka finally reemerged from the crowd, to discover Nagisa nearly managed to fulfill his threat of leaving them without anything to eat for deserting him. All that remained for their sampling pleasure was a few clumps of squid paella, half a squid burger, and the tail end of one half of the roast corn on the cob.

“I thought you would never come back..! What took you so long, Haru-chan?!”

“Sorry, sorry,” replied Makoto with a soothing smile before Haru could so much as open his mouth. “We found a vending machine, but we were out of spare change, so we had to make an exchange,” he said in an innocent tone. Haru sighed in contentment.

“You could have hurried a little more,” huffed Nagisa, but he cracked a grateful smile at the soda they got for him. He took a few hurried gulps to wet his throat. “Aaah, that hit the spot.”

“So this is all ours now..?” asked Makoto in a teasing tone, shooting an amused look at the scraps on the table. Nagisa let out a small, uneasy laugh, his cheeks tinged.

“I got nervous sitting here all by myself,” he said in an apologetic tone as he reached out to sort his leftovers, gathering the empty containers in a heap to one side while pushing the more promising ones towards his friends, who sat down next to each other, opposite Nagisa.

“Here you go… sorry,” mumbled Nagisa. Makoto laughed.

“It’s alright. We’ll buy some more later if we get hungry.” He then turned to Haruka with a smile. “What will you have, Haru?”

“You said you didn’t want a squid burger, right?” asked Haru, gathering the light blue parcel in his hands. “I’ll have this, then. You can have the paella and the corn.”

“Alright. Thank you,” said Makoto as he took the untouched pair of chopsticks. Haru unwrapped the burger and sank his teeth into it. Nagisa smiled.

“After you’ve eaten, we could play a shooting game!” he suggested, pointing to a nearby stall in excitement. “I heard you can win a huge Monoika plush as a special prize!”

“Monoika?” asked Makoto. Even Haru looked up from his burger.

“Mhmm! It’s a tribute to a character in a video game! I want it so bad!” sighed Nagisa, his expression dreamy. “It’s a huge white and light blue squid plush, with one eye black and one eye red!”

Makoto and Haru turned to each other, their faces deadpan.

“Oh..” they sighed in synch, mirroring each other as they turned back to Nagisa bouncing in his seat.

“Can we go soon?” he asked, eager to start his quest at once. Makoto shook his head.

“I’m afraid we can’t until the table is clean, but we can’t clean up until we’ve eaten everything…” he said, his smile serene. Nagisa gasped.

“Leave the clean up to me, then!” he said as he gathered the empty trays in a hurry, then rushed off to throw them in a nearby trash can. Haru’s brow flattened.

“That was easy,” he said, his face guarded. Makoto laughed.

“Sometimes the right words can do wonders,” he replied, keeping his smile as he set down the empty paella container just in time for Nagisa to claim it on his way back.

* * *

“Aww, no Monoika..?” moaned Nagisa in disappointment. They had now gone through three shooting stalls that no longer carried the special prize. The vendor flashed him a toothy grin.

“A young lady won this one,” he said with a nudge of the cap on his head. “A fella tried to win it for her but he missed the first time, so she helped him steady the gun and they aimed together. Next shot, smack dab in the middle. Puts him to shame if ya ask me.”

“Lucky…” fumed Nagisa, but he gave a handful of coins to the man anyway, wanting above all else to be doing _something_ as he waited for another update from Rei. Makoto declined, as no prizes managed to pique his interest, but Haru decided to give it a go, so he and Nagisa soon received a shotgun each.

“Okay, I want that game console, then!” said Nagisa. He leaned over the counter as much as he could, then fired. “Ah man, I missed…”

The phone vibrated against his tummy, singing the tune he had set for Rei. Nagisa twitched. He turned to Makoto, holding out the shotgun for him.

“Mako-chan, can you hold this?” he asked, nudging it towards him. Beside them, Haru fired his gun, missing the orca plush by mere millimeters.

“Sure,” replied Makoto with the inexhaustible patience of an older brother, taking the shotgun with a smile. He considered shooting it, but ultimately decided against wasting Nagisa’s rounds and continued to wait patiently for his friend, who inched to the other end of the stall to check his message. His heart fluttered as images of a young, dashing detective flashed through his mind.

_From: Rei-chan_

_The target is currently walking through the stalls by the beach and heading for the main road, over._

Nagisa’s tongue poked out as he mashed in a reply.

_To: Rei-chan_

_Roger that._

On the other end, Haru straightened, then put down his gun, turning to Makoto with a slight flush.

“I need to go to the restroom,” he whispered to Makoto. The other paused.

“I think the closest one would be in the convenience store on the main road,” he replied, the last words ringing loud in Nagisa’s ears.

“Got it,” said Haru, who was about to turn when Nagisa swooped in to seize his arm.

“ _Wait!_ ” he cried, startling Haru into stopping to look at him. “Can’t you hold it in a little longer?” asked Nagisa with a pained laugh.

Haru’s breath hitched. Makoto’s eyes widened.

“O-Oh, wait, I think there might be a porta potty over there,” he said, turning to point at a blue plastic box wedged between two stalls to their right. “This one’s a lot closer.”

“Yeah,” replied Haru without looking at him, waiting for Nagisa to release his arm. “I’ll use that, then.”

Nagisa’s fingers loosened with a grateful grin at Makoto, who smiled back as he held out the shotgun for Nagisa to take. Nagisa plucked it from his hand.

“I’ll go with you,” said Makoto, who now turned away to follow Haru. Nagisa let out a sigh, one hand pressing down on his jolting heart.

“Never again,” he told himself as he slumped on the counter with his shotgun, half wishing Rin-chan would just leave the festival so this nightmare would be over.

* * *

Meanwhile, Rei had a splendid time following Rin around. Soon enough, he completely immersed himself in the role of the hardboiled detective as he stalked his target one stall at a time, occasionally allowing himself a purchase to reward his own efforts. He found no squid tempura or squid and chips on the way, but fried squid turned out perfect as dinner for one on the go, so Rei went through three different kinds (salted, soy-glazed, and covered in crispy panko) as he drifted down the road towards the beach in pursuit of Rin.

In the end, it was just as well that he had purchased food on the way, for there were no more stalls by the piers to soothe his hunger, or quench his thirst for squid merchandise. The further they walked, the darker the road had become. After a while, they had even run out of cheerful lanterns to light the way, yet Rin carried on walking just the same, as though he were making a slow escape.

“There aren’t any stalls over here,” risked Nitori in a sheepish tone.

“I know,” replied Rin without even looking.

“Let’s go back,” said Nitori almost pleading, his eyes seeking Rin’s to no avail.

“You can go back,” came the distant reply.

Aiichiro’s eyes widened. His steps slowed to a crawl as the distance between them swelled into miles and light years, where each word would have travelled an eternity, never to reach the other’s ears again.

“Matsuoka-senpai…” whispered Aiichiro, defeated at last by the other’s cold indifference. A moment later, his eyes fell to the ground, not even noticing that a tall, dark figure tiptoed around him with loud clicks of his geta, then took off in Rin’s direction with hurried steps.

The piers yawned empty except for a few couples seeking darkness to stare at the stars above, but even in the face of their beauty, Rin arched his head forward and marched on with long, rigid steps, blind and deaf to everyone around him. Having no choice but to follow him, Rei continued to stalk after him confused, glancing back only once to see that shorter boy still standing where Rin had left him.

* * *

Once Haru and Makoto returned, Nagisa ushered them to the next attraction, a shallow pool full of small, colorful balloons with loops at the end of their strings. Haru’s eyes flickered in familiarity, reminding Makoto of how Haru had been staring at it before they went away to watch Squid Catching Heaven. His face softened into a smile.

 To fish for prizes, each of them received a thin rod with a four-pointed hook on the end. The owner of the pool told them they had a single minute to fish to their hearts’ content, and having nothing better to do, even Makoto joined in to test himself. To his eternal sadness, he proved terribly clumsy with the delicate instrument. Ten careful tries and he couldn’t nab a single balloon, while Haru himself managed to hook three within the first thirty seconds, his face betraying nothing except mild concentration.

Makoto watched him like a hawk. He dipped his hook into the water again just as Haru lowered his a fourth time, but while Makoto came up empty-handed, Nagisa managed to nab a balloon from right under his nose. Nagisa giggled as he lifted it out to show Makoto.

“It works better if you don’t try so hard, Mako-chan. Just like in real life!” he said.

Makoto laughed.

“Sometimes, things don’t work unless you try hard, though,” he said in his own defense, his eyes subconsciously drifting to Haruka, who had caught the fourth balloon and added it to the ones dangling from his grasp. Beside him, two little boys were gawking in awe at his superior balloon-fishing skills.

“Awesome!” whispered one of them.

“Lucky…” breathed the other, the two having spent their last coins on the pool without a single balloon between them to show for it. Haru turned to look at them, pausing for a second as he thought of how the pool was a mere distraction from Rin, how the balloons in his hand signified little more than possessing greater dexterity of hand than the others, and how something as silly as balloons could make others so happy…

 _This is something Makoto might do if he could_ , he thought to himself as he held out the balloons to them.

“You can have them if you want,” he told the boys quietly.

“Really?! Yaaaay!” they cried, their little faces beaming with joy.

“We can show them off to Taa-chan and everyone else!” one said to the other with obvious pleasure, and so Haru let them curl their little hands around the strings, watching silently as they gave back their rods to the vendor, then ran off with their bounty.

When they disappeared, Haru sighed. His gesture might have been generous and the right thing to do, but it brought little satisfaction or happiness. With his distractions gone, Haru now had to find new ones to take his mind off Rin. No matter how much of the outside world Makoto could ward off by sheer presence, he had no power over Haru’s wandering thoughts. At least, not without doing something more…

Opposite him, Makoto’s brow creased in worry at Haru’s tired expression. Nagisa didn’t notice, having just received a text from Rei, who informed him that Rin was heading in a direction Nagisa could not quite put his finger on.

“Um, Mako-chan,” he turned to Makoto, doing his best to feign innocence. “Do you know where the park in District Three leads to?”

“You mean from where we are?” asked Makoto. Nagisa flushed, but gave him a reluctant nod. Makoto cupped his chin.

“I’m pretty sure it leads to Iwatobi Elementary,” he replied. “I take a different route, but that’s where my siblings go to school, so I’ve been there many times to pick them up.”

“Iwatobi Elementary, huh…” mused Nagisa, then twitched in surprise. _But that’s…!_

* * *

 _…where Rin-senpai and Haruka-senpai used to go to school together_ , realized Rei as the low concrete wall and its green chain link fence swam into view. He remembered the place well, though he had visited with Nagisa once and only once, to see the results of a project Rin and Haruka’s class had undertaken that year. Rin continued to walk along the fence, but his pace slowed until his last step brought him just opposite a large tree, standing guard over the shallow outdoor pool in the schoolyard.

Forced to hide behind the corner, Rei took refuge behind the concrete wall. He only allowed himself to peer over it at short intervals, but he thought he could discern the flowerbed under the tree, which stood encased in a shallow wall of bricks. Rei waited, his heart pounding behind his cover. Why would Rin-senpai come here after so many years, when there was nothing to see except the flowers?

Rin drew closer to the fence, his eyes on the tree that loomed large and green and boring in the distance, having already shed its blossoms into the pool that bore no trace of them anymore. He should have known his feet would take him here. The town of Iwatobi held but three attractions for him in the few short months he had spent there as a child: the Iwatobi Swimming Club, Haru’s house, and Iwatobi Elementary School. With one now demolished, and the other the stuff of nightmares, only his school memories remained intact, including that stupid flower bed with its brick wall full of messages, written by children who passed away into adulthood long ago. Rin’s heart clenched like a tired fist. Where did time go, that invisible graveyard of children’s hopes and dreams that no one could ever truly escape? Where was the Matsuoka Rin who was once happy here, who bawled at his graduation like those three hellish months had been the best time of his life..?

His eyes fell on the shimmering surface of the water and Rin fell backwards in time, back to the stadium pool where at the age of twelve, he had finally assembled the perfect team for the medley relay.

 _He was to go first, the leader, the alpha, to become the start of something grand, the revival of another dream from before he was even born._ _He kicked himself backwards in an arch, launching away from the wall into the water. Even through the roar of the water splashing in his ears, he could still hear the others chanting his name._

_“Rin!” called out Haru, his young voice unusually tense, even excited. “Rin-chan!” shrieked Nagisa as loudly as his tiny lungs could bear. “Rin-senpai!” cried Rei, who already wore prescription goggles at the tender age of eleven._

Rin’s lips parted, eyes fixed blankly on the water that had never seen him swim in a pool full of cherry blossoms – just another silly dream of his gone, gone forever.

_His hand touched the wall. He could hear Nagisa burst through the surface behind him._

_“Go, Nagisa!” he cried out as soon as he regained breath, hoisting himself out of the pool with lightning speed so he could watch Nagisa swim. Oh, how small he was, and how desperately he bobbed up and down forward to the wall…_

Rin’s fingers pressed against the chain links.

_Nagisa was getting closer and Rei stepped onto the block, adjusting his goggles one more time before curling into place. Not even a split second seemed to pass between Nagisa’s hands touching the wall and Rei diving in. It was the most professional relay exchange young Rin had ever seen, by his own team, too…!_

His fingers curled around the links like tired, feeble claws.

_Nobody in the audience would have been able to tell that Rei had any trouble swimming other strokes. He was fast and efficient, paving the final stretch towards the anchor, the omega – to Haru, for whom Rin had sacrificed everything: Sano Elementary, his friends, his old team, and Sousuke…_

His hand trembled, but the harder he clenched the chain links, the more violent his convulsions grew.

_Rei pulled in and Haru leaped off the block, his thin, graceful form so picture perfect even back then._

_“Haru!” he could hear his own voice ringing across the stadium._

_“Haru-chan!” “Haruka-senpai!”_

Rin gritted his teeth as the young Haru of his memories matured into the toned, slender swimmer he saw that last day of prefecturals, gliding down the lane with the effortless elegance of a mermaid.

 _Some things never change,_ he thought. _“Haru-chan!” “Haruka-senpai!”_

Never.

_“…Haru!”_

Except for that voice, no longer Rin’s own but someone else’s, that called Nanase ‘Haru.’ Not ‘Haruka,’ not any variation of his name with an honorific tacked onto the end, but ‘Haru,’ _and Haru listened to it._

Rin’s hands petrified as the memory of Haru swam past him again, as perfectly divorced from him as the pool seemed unreachable behind the chain link fence.

For all Rin knew, that fence might have been there all along.

His heart jolted at the thought. One hand still gripped the links too tightly to let go, but the other curled to Rin’s chest to cling to the folds of his shirt, clawing into it as though he were trying to wrench out his heart.

In the distance, Rei could do nothing but watch as Rin reeled and tore himself away from the fence. Rin lunched backwards with a heave, but the moment he steadied himself, he broke into a desperate run back towards the park. Rei could just barely duck behind the wall again as Rin rushed past him, his gasps sharp and hysterical in the silence.

Rei rose to his feet, then stepped away from the wall, his face a little pale except for the slight glow of his cheeks.

“Rin-senpai…” he breathed, his lips twitching into the shadow of a smile. _Could it be that you were reminiscing about the past? That despite your cold demeanor these past few months, you still miss us as much as we miss you?_

His hands clenched in determination, the smile on his face swelling into a grin.

_Don’t you worry, Rin-senpai. As vice-captain of the Iwatobi Swim Club, I promise I will do everything in my power to make sure we meet again… soon!_


	49. EPISODE 9: Hesitant Loosen Up! - Part 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once their minute of balloon fishing was up, the boys returned their fishing rods to the stall, Makoto and Haruka empty-handed, but Nagisa boasting two balloons in total. Having no means of carrying his prizes around, however, he handed them back to the vendor with a good grace, for other lucky adventurers to claim.

“What’s next?” he asked as he bounced in excitement, his eyes darting left and right in search of new games to play. Haru’s expression wilted at once under such raw displays of enthusiasm, suddenly conscious of how little energy he had left after having eaten nothing but half a burger all evening.

“I’m hungry,” he said as he turned to Makoto with hopeful looks. Makoto smiled.

“Me too…” he replied, shooting Nagisa an apologetic glance. Nagisa scratched at the back of his head with a sheepish giggle. Makoto turned back to Haruka. “What would you like to have, Haru? …Other than mackerel, that is,” he added with a grin. Haru turned his head.

“I don’t know,” he said with a shrug. Makoto cupped his chin.

“Well, I saw something back there that I’d like to try,” he said, pointing towards the direction they had come from to test their balloon fishing skills. “If you like it too, we could have some together.”

Haru quirked a brow while Nagisa’s eyes widened in curiosity, their interest obvious piqued. Makoto laughed, then nodded for them to follow him, guiding his friends towards a yellow stall further up, where two teenagers were busy cooking and dressing what appeared to be a twist on takoyaki.

“Welcome,” said the boy in charge of cutting up ingredients, and putting seasoning on the freshly cooked dumplings. “Care for a sample of our takoyaki? For the festival, we put squid in the middle instead of octopus,” he said with a smile.

“Yes, please,” replied Makoto as he pulled out his wallet to pay.

“I need three, Touya,” said the boy to his partner by the takoyaki pan.

Within seconds, Touya plucked three freshly cooked balls of takoyaki out of their molds onto a small tray, which he pushed onto the counter for his friend.

“Here, Yuki,” he replied, his attention now back on the pan and its golden cargo.

“Thank you,” replied his friend, who proceeded to slather the dumplings with takoyaki sauce and some shaved dry bonito, adding a toothpick on the side as the final touch.

“Here you are,” he said next, holding out the tray to Makoto.

“Thank you,” Makoto took it with an eager grin, then turned to Haru and Nagisa to show them the takoyaki, piercing one of the dumplings with the toothpick to put it in his mouth. Haru and Nagisa watched in anticipation. Makoto’s lips parted.

“Ah, it’s delicious..!” he breathed with a hot tongue, still feeling the sear of the hot pan. Yuki laughed. Makoto poked his toothpick into the next takoyaki, this time reaching it out to Haruka. “Wanna try one, Haru?”

Haru’s hand twitched upward, then seemed to hover in hesitation, and for daring to show even a moment of weakness, Nagisa swooped in the next second with his mouth wide open, biting the takoyaki clean off the toothpick before either could move to stop him.

“Hey..!” cried Makoto in surprise, staring at Nagisa in disbelief. Just how big a stomach could such a tiny person have?

“ _Nagisa.._ ” hissed Haru, shooting him a dirty look, but Nagisa only gurgled with grainy laughter over his mouthful of takoyaki.

“Eawwy biwd geffs ffe wohm,” he said with a grin, his cheeks bulging with each muffled syllable. Makoto placed a heavy hand over his face.

“Please don’t talk with your mouth full,” he mumbled under his palm. Nagisa swallowed audibly, then wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.

“Don’t worry, Mako-chan, I’m full now and there’s still one takoyaki left for Haru-chan,” he said, his speech now unobstructed. Haru pursed his lips. Makoto sighed.

“Well, I guess it’s only fair to split a sample between all of us,” he said in a sheepish tone, “but you really could have waited instead of stealing Haru’s like that.”

“I didn’t steal his takoyaki,” replied Nagisa with a scandalized look, pointing to the last dumpling on Makoto’s tray. “ _That_ _one’s_ Haru-chan’s.”

Makoto rolled his eyes amused, then lanced the final takoyaki with his toothpick, offering it to Haru with a smile.

“Here,” he said with a slight cock of his head. Haru swallowed lightly.

He steeled himself, clasping his hands together to incapacitate them, then bowed his head forward to do just as Nagisa had done before him. Unlike Nagisa, however, Haru’s smaller mouth seemed unable to part wider than the size of the dumpling, so he wrapped his lips around the takoyaki in slow motion to coax it off the toothpick, his cheeks tinged pink in the effort. Makoto stared at him stunned, red from his neck to the tips of his ears, and his hand holding the tray visibly trembling. Nagisa shook his head as he pulled the tray gently out of Makoto’s grasp, then plucked the toothpick from his hand to toss both in the nearest trashcan. Meanwhile, Haru masticated slowly, savoring the batter and its tender squiddy center with catlike curiosity.

At last, he swallowed. Makoto’s heart hummed beneath his yukata.

“It’s good,” said Haruka at last, forcing himself to look Makoto in the eye. “I want another.”

Makoto spun back to an awkwardly smiling Yuki at once, his wallet back in his hand again. “I’ll take a large tray, please.”

“How many toothpicks this time?” said Touya from behind the pan, his brow sharply arched. Makoto lowered his eyes.

“Two, please,” he mumbled, his index and middle fingers held out for the count. Nagisa turned away to smother his laughter.

* * *

Armed with a toothpick each, Makoto and Haruka returned to the tents again to find an empty table, settling down with a tray of twenty takoyaki set between them. Nagisa lingered a few feet away, back turned as he checked his phone every ten seconds in the hopes of an update from Rei, who was running considerably late with his spy reports. Makoto shook his head with a lenient look, then pushed his toothpick into the nearest dumpling, lifting it to his mouth with one hand cupped under his chin for safety.

“I think we should ask him about Rei after we finish this,” he whispered to Haru once he made short work of the dumpling. Haru nodded in silence, his mouth still full with his first takoyaki. Makoto cocked his head with a smile.

They carried on eating without another word, each waiting until the other picked their next takoyaki to pierce their chosen dumpling and claim it for themselves. Having eaten so little before, twenty soon became four, Haru shooting more and more glances at Makoto as the number thinned down to one more each. Makoto lanced the dumpling nearest to him. Haru jammed his toothpick into the other one, and just as Makoto was about to raise his hand, Haru lifted his takoyaki towards him.

Makoto blinked in surprise. Haru colored, but refused to look away.

After a moment of hesitation, Makoto chuckled and leaned forward, plucking the dumpling off the toothpick with his teeth. Haru watched him like a hawk. Makoto averted his eyes as he ate, looking back only once he swallowed.

“Since everyone else did it, too,” said Haru, turning his head a little. Makoto laughed.

“I suppose it’s kind of fun to feed others,” he replied, biting his lip in embarrassment as he held out the last takoyaki towards Haru. “Your turn, then,” he said innocently.

He blushed only faintly as Haru’s lips eased down on the last dumpling and tightened around it, but looked away as Haru savored his final bites.

* * *

A few feet away, Nagisa decided he could bear to wait no longer and mashed in a text message to Rei, glaring down his phone as though that would speed up the reply.

In the distance, still standing by the chain link fence of Iwatobi Elementary, Rei was reminded of his forgotten duties by the sharp ping of his phone.

_From: Hazuki Nagisa_

_Where are you now?_

Rei began typing with a guilty smile.

_To: Hazuki Nagisa_

_Iwatobi Elementary School._

“Thought so…” sighed Nagisa to himself, still surprised Rin should stray so far from the festival when he even had a companion for the evening. His phone vibrated before he could even think of a reply.

_From: Rei-chan_

_He has just run off and I lost sight of him… Sorry, Nagisa-kun._

“Eh?!” cried Nagisa, slapping a hand over his mouth a second too late.

He glanced over his shoulder in alarm. To his horror, Haru and Makoto now stood right behind him, Haru staring at him in curiosity and Makoto with amused fondness.

“Were you texting Rei just now?” asked Haru. Nagisa yelped.

“Aaah, um.. yeah, I was…” he mumbled, shooting a weary look at Makoto, but his friend’s expression betrayed no discomfort.

“Is he still walking around with his friend?” asked Haru next. Nagisa lowered his eyes.

“N-No.. he just said goodbye.”

“Then tell him to come back,” said Haruka calmly. Beside him, Makoto gave Nagisa a nod of encouragement. Nagisa flashed them a grateful smile in return.

“Okay. I’ll go and get him, then! Will you stay here?”

“If we move somewhere else, we’ll let you know,” said Makoto with a smile. Nagisa grinned.

“Alright! We’ll be back soon!” he promised, then turned around, breaking into a light jog with his phone in hand. His geta clicked furiously on the concrete as he made his escape, so relieved to be freed from his own scheme he could have wept with joy.

Makoto and Haru stared after him, until Nagisa took a turn and disappeared completely from sight. The two of them now stood alone in a sea of perfect strangers, with no one to hail them and no one to mind… except, perhaps that faint shadow of Rin, which hung over Haruka’s thoughts even now. Was Rin still at the festival, or had he gone back to Samezuka? Had Rei been talking to him all this time? With Nagisa’s leave, the curtain might have fallen on their charades, but all their performance left was a growing pile of questions with no one to supply a ready answer, not even Makoto.

As if on cue, Makoto cleared his throat as softly as he could manage. Haru flinched, turning to him self-consciously.

“Are you alright, Haru?” asked Makoto. Haru reluctantly nodded. Makoto smiled at him, a soft, troubled smile. “That’s great. I’m glad.”

There was a pause, then Makoto drew a sharper breath, that reliable harbinger of something important he had to say. Haru’s heart fluttered in recognition.

“Well, it looks like we’ll be here by ourselves for a while,” said Makoto cautiously, his hands finding each other in the safety of his yukata sleeves. As the idea dawned on him, Haru felt a burst of heat within, rushing from his heart to his ears in an instant. “Is there anything you would like to do while we wait, Haru..?”

Haru turned his head a little too sharply. Makoto’s brow creased.

“Do.. would you like a drink, Haru?” he said, now sounding concerned. “Is there anything I can get you? Is there someplace you would like to go?”

Haru bit his lip before he could have said _I want to go home_ , forcing himself to look around in search of anything he could latch onto for what precious little time they had left. In the distance, the shrine loomed dark and deserted, the water of god having retired for the night. Haru turned back to Makoto.

“Can we go back to the shrine?” he said, his voice low. Makoto glanced to the dark hill and quirked his brow, but the small knot that formed in Haru’s stomach dissolved with his next smile, which spoke of understanding, and the willingness to please him.

“You want away from the crowd?” Makoto asked gently. Haru nodded once, twice. “Alright, Haru. Do you want a drink before we go?”

“Sure,” replied Haruka.

After Makoto purchased two sodas from a nearby vending machine, then composed a short text for Nagisa to explain where they were going, he and Haruka walked down the road, to find that small connecting path towards the shrine.

On the way, Haru glimpsed a small pool for scooping goldfish. If Makoto had noticed, he showed no sign of it, keeping his eyes on the road. Haru drew a little closer to him.

* * *

Shrouded in shadows, the shrine looked rather foreboding from the middle of the brightly lit harbor, but as Makoto and Haru proceeded to climb the wide, shallow steps towards the top, they found that the light of the lanterns carried over considerably, lending a subtle yellow luster to the deserted lookout point by the shrine. They stopped by the railing where they could behold the entire harbor, which wound from one hill to the other like a large, luminous serpent with hundreds of human ants bustling on its back.

Makoto cracked open his drink and took a long sip. Haruka’s soda can remained in his hands unopened, even forgotten as Haru’s eyes settled on the ocean with a somber expression. Makoto’s brow creased. The pleasant thoughts that accompanied him on the way fled from the fields of his mind like startled deer.

“Haru..”

Haruka stood motionless beside him, as though he hadn’t heard him. Makoto lowered his eyes.

“Do you miss Rin..?”

Haru seemed startled as he turned his head slightly towards Makoto, but still made no reply. He felt he didn’t have to. If anyone, Makoto could read his face like a favorite book, whose phrases had been committed to memory ages ago.

“I don’t know if Rei or Nagisa told you,” began Makoto in a slow, tentative tone, “but on the first day of the tournament, when I ran off to find you, Rei, Nagisa and I ran into Rin in the hallway. I... It wasn’t a happy meeting, for any of us. But at one point, Rei said something to Rin that made me think, something about the spiritual union of four teammates. And long before that, when you all came to the track field to see me after joint practice, I think Nagisa mentioned that Rin was—”

“The alpha,” finished Haru in a distant tone, his eyes fixed on the water. Makoto tensed.

“Yeah. So.. the four of you really did swim a medley relay,” he concluded.

Haru nodded. “Yeah. Once, when we were kids. Rin swam backstroke.”

“Ah.”

Makoto’s shoulders sank as he slumped against the railing under the weight of those words. His eyes fell on the water almost willingly, unable to look at Haru until he had hardened himself and gathered his thoughts again. Haru stole a glance at him, but remained silent. Makoto drew another sharp breath.

“You know… To this day I still cannot believe I actually swam in a medley relay,” he began once more, chuckling softly as he lifted his eyes to the sky. “When the first day of the tournament ended, I thought everything was over, so when the others asked me how I felt, I told them I wished I had a second chance to swim, so I could make everyone proud. I still felt guilty about my first event, so it was kind of easy to say that, thinking I had no more chances to swim anyway. But then Kou-chan told us how she had signed us up for the relay in secret, and the moment it sank in that I really did have a chance to swim again, I got scared.”

Haru peered up at him. Makoto’s expression had darkened a little, but soon the lines were smoothed over again.

“And yet, at the same time, I was looking forward to it,” continued Makoto. “Especially once you agreed to swim, too.”

Haru’s eyes left the water completely. Makoto flushed.

“I was still pretty anxious about letting everyone down, though,” he carried on. “I knew none of us had practiced for the relay at all, so I got really frantic in the water. Diving in with all my strength, swimming as hard as I could so the next person could go… but beneath all that tension, I felt like everything was going to be fine, because Haru and everyone else was there with me, waiting for me by the starting block. I’ve never felt anything like that before.”

Under Haru’s watchful eye, Makoto’s lips widened into a smile.

“In the end, swimming a relay with you, with everyone, made me very happy, Haru.”

Haru’s heart skipped a beat, his eyes shimmering in the soft glow of the lanterns below. He lowered his head guiltily, then turned away, his hands tightening around the soda can.

“I’m… not so sure how I feel anymore,” he said quietly.

Confusion crept into Makoto’s features.

“What do you mean?”

Haru tensed as another knot formed in the pit of his stomach.

“I always believed that I didn’t need a reason to swim,” he began. “That I just needed to feel the water, and that was enough. But when I lost to Rin… everything became dark.”

His pause filled with Rin’s voice, ringing through Haru’s mind like a broken record.

“I know I will never get to swim with Rin again,” breathed Haru, as if in pain and Makoto paled, his eyes large like he had been slapped in the face.

“I didn’t care about anything at that point,” carried on Haru, his gaze boring holes into the soda can. “Not the tournament or anything else. If Nagisa hadn’t come to get me, I would not have come to watch any of you swim.”

He paused to steal a guilty glance at Makoto. He averted his eyes.

“I’m sorry.”

Pale and forlorn as he looked, Makoto’s expression softened by degrees until his earlier chills melted into a tired smile.

“It’s okay, Haru,” he said quietly. “We all understood you weren’t feeling well.”

Haru bit his lip. Makoto’s smile wilted into a frown.

“The others weren’t too worried at first, but when we came to your house and couldn’t find you or reach your phone, everyone became anxious,” he went on, immersing himself in the vista again. “As we waited, Rei and Nagisa talked about how long they’ve been waiting to swim with you again, and the more they talked, the more I felt that I wanted to make that dream come true. I told myself I trained very hard to make it possible.. and so I would swim with you, even if I ended up being no more than filler.”

Haru’s eyes widened, his heart lodged in his throat so tightly the words, _You’re not filler_ came out no more than a rasp in the struggle to speak. It was hard enough to breathe, let alone gather the right words, but he still had to try.

“Rin once said he would show me a sight I’ve never seen before,” Haru began once more, his tone tentative. “And when we swam the relay, it felt like I really did see it. That he and I, and Nagisa and Rei, were truly united as a team.”

Makoto’s hands clenched around the railing hard enough to turn his knuckles white. Haru’s fingers tightened on the can a little more, pressing shallow dents into the sides.

“I thought nothing would ever compare to that,” he continued, his cheeks coloring in the effort. “Nothing. But on that day at prefecturals, I remembered how it felt to swim in the same lane with others, and how it felt when everyone was waiting for me at the finish line…” he breathed, releasing the can with one hand to sink his fingers into the folds of his yukata, just above his trembling heart. He then turned to Makoto, to look him in the eye as the words bubbled up and burst out of him.

“Swimming with you.. made me just as happy!”

For a few seconds, Makoto stared at him in absolute shock. Haru held his breath, his heart hammering at his own nerve, but the next moment, the spell that hung over Makoto broke, and Haru watched in amazement as the budding smile on his lips bloomed into a grin that lit up his entire face. Had all the lanterns been snuffed out at exactly that moment, or the moon torn from the heavens, Haru would not have missed them, for Makoto had a glow of his own that shone brighter than any star in the sky.

“ _Haru..!_ ” he gasped, his eyes gleaming. “Do you really mean it?” he blurted before he could think, but he caused no offense. Haru merely stared back at him, burning with the desire to make him understand.

“Yeah..” he said in a sigh, and the moment he said it, anxiety unfurled from his shoulders and fell to his feet in heavy coils. He shivered in exhaustion of the feelings he had bottled up for well over a week. Makoto’s grin gave way to a look of tender concern.

“Are you cold, Haru?” he whispered, his eyes locked into Haruka’s. Haru’s eyes widened in realization.

“Yeah…” he whispered, the two of them locked in a stare.

Makoto lifted his arms towards him. Haru stepped closer…

“ _Haru-chan!_ ”

At the last moment, Makoto and Haruka jerked apart as if they had been burned, spinning around to the toriis, where Nagisa now stood doubled over on the final step with his hands propped against his knees. He was still gasping for air after having run a marathon to find Rei, then hurrying back with him to the shrine where Makoto’s message told him they would be. Rei was harder to spot. Equally bent out of shape, but refusing to show it, he hid himself behind the right torii while he struggled to regain his breath.

Haru’s brow twitched. History, it seemed, liked to repeat itself over and over again.

“There you are..!” heaved Nagisa. “We came… as fast, as we could..!”

 _You didn’t have to hurry like that_ , thought Haru, then turned his head in embarrassment at his own wishful thinking, while Makoto let out a nervous laugh and he tucked his arms behind his back. Rei finally stepped out of the shadows to reveal himself, looking more composed than Nagisa, who still seemed rather breathless.

“I’m sorry for disappearing so abruptly, Haruka-senpai,” he said with a bow. “It wasn’t my intention to leave the group for so long…”

Haru pursed his lips, but Makoto flashed Rei a smile.

“It’s alright, Rei. You’re here now and that’s what counts,” he replied with a small sideways tilt of his head. Rei returned his smile with a relieved sigh.

“Is everything alright?” he asked next.

“We’re fine,” spoke Haruka at last, his looks a little softened. “..Thank you, Rei.”

Rei blinked at him. Makoto cleared his throat.

“What Haru meant to say is that coming to the festival like this was a wonderful idea, Rei,” said Makoto, lifting his arms just barely to the sides as he spoke. As his gesture gave the impression that he included the idea of wearing yukata in his praise, Rei’s cheeks flushed with a surge of pride, his eyes gleaming in the light.

“T-Thank you, Haruka-senpai!” he gushed, beaming brightly as he turned to Nagisa, who looked equally pleased. Haru shot Makoto a look that the other did his best not to laugh at.

“Well, shall we take one more turn before we go home?” asked Makoto. Haru bit his lip.

“Wait,” he said, his voice raised enough to regain the attention of Nagisa and Rei. They drew closer to listen. Haru’s hands clenched under his sleeves.

“Nagisa. Rei. Makoto,” he began, taking a deep breath to steel himself. “I just want to say… that I’m fine. And I want to swim in the relay. I want to swim with you, _again!_ ”

“Haru..!” breathed Makoto, that happy glow returning to his face once more. Nagisa and Rei grinned wordlessly, but after a moment of pleasant surprise, they cried _Okay!_ in raptures. Even Haru’s lips twitched into a small, content smile. Was he healing at last? Maybe there was hope for him after all…

“That means we have to start training really hard to make it to nationals!” cheered Nagisa.

“I’m getting fired up!” said Rei with a light push at his glasses. Makoto laughed.

“Maybe we should head home so we’d be well-rested for tomorrow, then.”

At his words, Haru stepped forward, spurred by a whim. After all, if even he could heal, there had to be hope for others as well…

“Not yet,” he said quietly. “There’s one last thing.”

“Huh? What is it?” asked Nagisa, but Haru did not reply. He merely passed Makoto with that small smile still in place, so the other followed him, heading down the steps leading back to the festival. As Haru led them, Makoto caught up to him until the two walked side by side, brushing just a little too close together.

* * *

On their way back to the festival, each kept guessing what Haru wanted to do. _Maybe he’s still hungry_ , thought Nagisa. _Is there another event that’s about to start_ , wondered Rei. Even Makoto seemed at a loss, but not for long. After careful navigation of previously seen stalls, Haru eventually led them to an inflatable pool that still held over two dozen goldfish for scooping.

Haru gave some coins to the owner in exchange for a small net, then crouched down to the pool, the others watching in awe. Within one minute, just as he had managed to hook the balloons with pinpoint accuracy, he gathered four goldfish into a plastic bag: one gray, one orange, and two red ones that had slipped into his net together.

“I’m impressed, Haruka-senpai,” said Rei when Haru straightened at last, handing the net back to the vendor before turning around to Makoto. He held out the bag, one hand clasping the strings and the other cupping it gently from below.

“For you,” he said quietly, the smile finding its way back after concentration had banished it for a short while. Makoto’s eyes widened like a child’s.

“Can I really have these?” he blurted, cheeks flushed as his fingers brushed against Haru’s in an attempt to hook into the strings. Haru nodded firmly, letting Makoto cup his other hand before slipping it out from underneath the bag, which flopped softly into Makoto’s palm.

“You’re the only one who’s likely to take care of them,” remarked Nagisa. Rei scoffed at the idea that he himself could ever be considered a thoughtless pet owner. Makoto laughed.

“I’ll take good care of them,” he promised with a grin.

Haru pursed his lips, but it was no use. He could not stop smiling at all and was forced to turn his gaze towards the sky.

“Be sure to keep them in a large and spacious tank, Makoto-san,” said Rei at last, fixing his glasses to give his words a more authoritative flair. “You should also name them to commemorate the occasion.”

“Name them?” mumbled Makoto, who barely had a moment to turn his mind to anything involving the keeping of goldfish, four goldfish that were now decidedly his. _Who would have thought…?_

“Name them Nagisa, Rei, Haruka, and Makoto,” suggested Nagisa, pointing from the orange goldfish to the gray one, and finally to the two identical red ones. Makoto flushed.

“I don’t know about that,” muttered Rei, who could not help but think it a ridiculous notion to name your pet after your friends, then shuddered at the thought of Makoto feeding “Rei,” watching “Rei” swim around, and cleaning up “Rei’s” poop from the bottom of the tank.

“Mackerel, Bonito, Tuna, Jackfish,” suggested Haru with a deadpan expression.

“What?” laughed Makoto, and as his laughter was utterly contagious, Nagisa and Rei soon joined him, now convinced their plan to cheer up and protect Haruka had been an absolute success.

* * *

To put as little strain on the fish as possible, everyone agreed to call it a night, so Nagisa and Rei headed to Iwatobi Station, while Makoto and Haruka hurried home together, Makoto cradling the bag to his chest for safe-keeping. Neither spoke on the way to Makoto’s house. Haru was out of breath from walking, and Makoto was too tongue-tied to even try and engage in small talk, but when they reached the gate, where Makoto beckoned him with a glance, Haruka followed him into the yard without a word.

They stopped in front of the goldfish grave to bow their heads, the ritual now coming quite naturally to Haruka.

“I hope you don’t mind if I use your bowl one more time,” said Makoto to the moss-covered stone and its glass bottle full of daisies. Haru shook his head with a small, bittersweet smile.

He relieved Makoto of the bag while his friend unlocked the front door, then crept inside, stalking upstairs to find the glass bowl he had stashed away in his closet. Haru remained in the hallway, cradling the bag in his hands until Makoto returned with silent steps, his arms full of the bowl and all its filtering equipment.

Haru waited patiently as Makoto filled the bowl a little over halfway, then set up the equipment at its former place on top of a large cupboard. Once Makoto nodded to him, Haru stepped forward and gently poured in the goldfish, wiggling the bag until it emptied. The water level now rose to a comfortable amount.

The fish took a few turns in their temporary abode, content to have escaped the bag. Makoto sighed in relief.

“I guess I’ll have to buy a proper tank as soon as possible,” he whispered, his smile troubled. “This bowl really is too small for so many fish. It might have even been too small for two.”

Haru hesitated.

“If you want,” he said, glancing from Makoto to the goldfish, “I can help you buy one tomorrow… Since I was the one who gave them to you.”

His cheeks flushed by the time he had finished. Makoto’s grin softened.

“That would be great, Haru,” he said softly. “But are there any stores open tomorrow? It’s gonna be Sunday,” he continued, cupping his chin in thought. “I suppose the mall might be open. I think I saw a pet store in there once…”

“There’s also the home improvement store,” said Haru. Makoto quirked his brow.

“Aren’t you banned from the home improvement store?” he said, his voice bordering on amused laughter. Haru turned his head archly. Makoto smothered his laughter.

“I suppose it’s worth checking out. Maybe if we go together and ask nicely, they’ll let you in like they did at the aquarium,” he said in a soothing tone. “And if they don’t, we’ll go to the mall, and I’ll make it up to you by treating you to lunch for all your trouble,” he said with a smile and that small sideways tilt of his head. Haru considered his words, then took a breath to brace himself.

“So if they let me into the home improvement store, I don’t get any lunch for my trouble..” he said, his features carefully guarded. Makoto blinked, but when he caught Haru’s meaning, his grin widened.

“I suppose we could have lunch no matter what,” he replied cheerfully. “Tomorrow, then? Is ten o’clock good for you, Haru?”

“Sure,” mumbled Haruka, his cheeks seared a victorious red. Makoto nodded.

“Then I’ll come over at ten to pick you up. That should leave us enough time to buy a tank, have lunch, bring the tank home, and still make it to practice on time. Oh, I should probably walk you home now so you can rest. Shall we go?”

“..Okay,” replied Haru, and though it was but a minute-long walk with no one around to pose any sort of danger, every step brought his arm grazing against Makoto’s until they reached Haru’s front door.

“Good night, Haru. And thank you,” said Makoto with a tender smile. Haru’s lips twitched upward.

“You’re welcome,” he said quietly, closing the door with a fluttering heart.

He was now alone, but not completely so. As he took off his father’s yukata in the bedroom, he could faintly smell Makoto’s cologne on the sleeves.

* * *

Back at the harbor, Seijuurou had spent a wonderful evening with Kou and her prized Monoika. When it was time for her to leave, it was with no small degree of well-disguised sadness that he escorted her to Iwatobi Station, where he helped her and the giant plush toy onto the train. When it was time, they parted all smiles and pleasantries as Kou’s train pulled out of the station, leaving the captain behind for now.

Having lost his most agreeable companion for the night, Seijuurou decided to stay and wait for his own train to arrive. That was when he received a text from Rin, who had never put the captain’s contact information to any use, but now sent him a most curious message.

_From: Matsuoka Rin_

_Captain, we need to talk. Where are you?_

The words left Seijuurou perplexed. _Ominous_ , he thought. Was it going to be a swim club discussion, or a heated argument with an overprotective brother? He could not rule out that possibility entirely, though having seen neither hide nor hair of Matsuoka all evening, and his addressing Seijuurou by rank, the captain placed his bet on the former. He smothered a frown as he typed a reply to the Samezuka black sheep.

_To: Matsuoka Rin_

_Iwatobi Station. I’ll be waiting._

He then closed his phone and threw his back against the wall, wondering faintly what sort of demands he might be facing after he had so magnanimously let Matsuoka have his way at prefecturals.

* * *

Just as Haruka handed the goldfish to Makoto, Matsuoka Rin rushed onto the platform at Iwatobi Station, gasping for breath after running from the park to catch Mikoshiba before the train could take him away. In the meantime, Aiichiro had arrived to the station as well, waiting patiently with the captain, who now stared at Rin even less amused than he felt at receiving his dubious message.

“What is it, Matsuoka?” he asked, making a mental note to let Kou-san know the wayward brother had been found twenty million years too late to meet his lovely sister. Aiichiro, on the other hand, was delighted with his senpai’s punctuality.

“You are just in time, Senpai! The train’s about to arrive,” he said from behind Seijuurou. Rin finally straightened, his shoulders tense as he stared Mikoshiba down.

“Captain. We need to talk alone.”

Aiichiro blinked. Mikoshiba arched his brow.

“Fine,” he said, shooting a look at Nitori, who lowered his eyes self-consciously as he drew away from them, sinking down onto a bench further off.

He even turned his head away from them. Seijuurou’s eyes flitted back to Rin.

“Well, what is it?”

“I want to swim in the relay,” said Rin. Mikoshiba’s forehead creased.

“At regionals?”

Rin merely stared at him in reply. The captain pursed his lips.

“You showed no interest in the relay before,” he remarked. Rin arched his head forward.

“The standard Samezuka practice is to form a relay team of the four fastest swimmers for each stroke. I meet the requirements. I want to swim.”

Mikoshiba sighed. _Leave it to Matsuoka to be well-prepared._

“Front crawl or backstroke?” he asked in a flat tone. Rin’s features hardened.

“Doesn’t matter. I’ll be the fastest either way.”

Mikoshiba scoffed in amusement.

“Very well, Matsuoka. Consider yourself part of the Samezuka medley relay team. I’ll have your stroke assigned by next day’s practice.”

Rin bowed his head in reply, then said no more, not even a brief thank you. Instead he dismissed himself to wait for his train by one of the pillars. Seijuurou shot him a hard look, then turned away from him. _Kou-san. Think of Kou-san_ , he told him, waiting.

* * *

Ten minutes later, their train took off and Rin now sat beside Nitori, while Seijuurou hid himself away in a seat some ways behind them, his fingers furiously pounding out a message for Kou.

_To:_ _♥_ _Kou-san_ _♥_

_Kou-san! Your brother has just arrived to Iwatobi Station, and is now on board the train to Samezuka Academy. I’m sorry you couldn’t see him tonight, but I have news that I think will make you happy! Your brother is now officially part of the Samezuka medley relay team! Congratulations, Kou-san! MAY THE BEST TEAM WIN AT REGIONALS! Yours, S._

His message arrived to a nearly depleted phone, which gave but a feeble whistle, then fell asleep in Kou’s kinchaku. She checked the now unresponsive phone and sighed, making a mental note to put it on the charger before going to bed.

* * *

By morning, Kou had forgotten that a message was waiting for her, but as she got ready for swim practice, she opened her phone out of habit to check for messages.

She gasped in horror. Ten minutes later, she left her house in a hurry, running all the way to the station, then from her stop to Iwatobi High School, her lungs screaming by the time she reached the pool. The others were already there. Haru had just risen to one of the starting blocks with Makoto waiting to time him, while Rei was busy massaging Nagisa’s shoulders as part of his warm-up.

“ _Big news!_ ” cried Kou as soon as she had enough air to speak, looking so pale despite exerting herself that the boys stared at her in nothing short of alarm.

“My brother’s going to swim in the relay at regionals!” she blurted, her eyes darting from one face to another.

She hardly knew what to make of their reactions. Rei was the only one who showed any signs of receiving her news positively, his grin unnaturally wide. Nagisa, on the other hand, stared back at her utterly surprised, eyes large and jaw hanging. Makoto’s face contorted as if someone had punched him in the gut.

And Haru, she could not say.

Shock? Confusion? Despair?

_Hope..?_

 

**_TO BE CONTINUED…_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You might have noticed a _Card Captor Sakura_ reference near the beginning, so here's a bit of trivia: The _Leave It to Kero-chan!_ special was the first time I became acquainted with takoyaki, and for some reason I thought it would be perfect for the scene, so I wrote it in. I only realized later that my 2014 _Free!_ calendar featured a picture of Makoto and Haruka in the park, Makoto holding out a takoyaki to Haru by the toothpick. Although I stared at that image for a good two months, I had no idea what the food was called or what it was made of. Thanks to CCS, I now know what takoyaki is, and my friend Saku (who has an Ao3 account under the same name) suggested I make it a full-blown CCS reference with Touya and Yuki working in unexpected places as usual, so I would like to thank her for the idea. God bless.


	50. FrFr! - Rin and Nitori's Day Out!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This bonus chapter honors Aiichiro and Rin’s birthdays, Ai’s having fallen right in the middle of Episode 9 and Rin’s thankfully falling between Episodes 9 and 10. It takes place the day after the festival shenanigans.
> 
> I hereby sadly inform you all that to this day, Kou still has no official birth date listed, so I was unable to write a FrFr! honoring her birthday. Imagine me glaring bitterly at the creators, because I can’t believe Momo immediately had a birth date listed and Kou still doesn’t. I am so sorry, Kou. The creators have been unkind to you, but I will cherish you forever in my heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Sunday, July 21, 2013.**

After a night of festivities that Aiichiro looked back upon with more pleasant feelings than Rin’s cold conduct warranted or deserved, the entire Samezuka swim team gathered by the pool at eight o’clock sharp as per Seijuurou’s instructions, who briefly informed them of Matsuoka’s admission to the medley relay team as their new backstroke swimmer. Rin himself showed little to no pride or enthusiasm while Mikoshiba told Azuma Yuuki, the previous backstroke swimmer to relinquish his position, but luckily for Rin, Aiichiro could be prevailed upon to cheer loud enough for both of them and eagerly show his support. Once the briefing was over, all Rin had to do was perform a bow of courtesy to his new teammates, tell them he was looking forward to training with them, and Seijuurou thought the business successfully concluded for the present.

Training began that very morning and lasted for ninety minutes, more than enough time for Rin to make it clear he had definitely earned the privilege of swimming in the medley relay as the fastest backstroke swimmer at Samezuka Academy. By the end of morning practice, even Azuma acknowledged the justness of Mikoshiba’s decision, and Aiichiro could not have been happier – except, perhaps, in the event that Matsuoka-senpai would agree to accompany him on his errands to Iwatobi town after practice.

“I need to go food shopping and I’m running low on deodorant,” Aiichiro told Rin as the two stood side by side in the showers, one rubbing his thin chest vigorously with soap, and the other massaging shampoo into his scalp in slow, circular motions. “And then there’s buying ink for the pens that ran out, and batteries for my music player… and I thought it might be nice to have lunch while I’m out, since I mostly eat at the cafeteria.”

“Uh huh,” hummed Rin, growing suspect of where his kouhai’s discourse tended, and unsurprised when he turned his head just slightly to find Nitori peering up at him, his hair a dark, damp gray against his wet scalp.

“I think I could do all of this at Iwatobi Mall,” continued Aiichiro with fierce determination, his eyes locking into Rin’s. “And if Senpai had any errands or shopping to do, we could go together!”

Rin paused, too tempted to say no at once. Were he to search his true feelings, the last thing he wanted to do was go to that wretched rat hole of a town and risk running into someone, be it one of _those guys_ or his nosy sister. Had he not suffered enough as it was? Yet Nitori was staring up at him with those large turquoise eyes, lighter and more effervescent than Haru’s darker ones and almost identical to Sousuke’s, until Rin found himself giving a bit more thought to his predicament. What were the chances of any of them converging at Iwatobi Mall today when he had seen nothing of them at Hachiman-sama’s Festival, an event he could logically expect most locals to attend? Viewed in such a light, the chances seemed slim enough. Haru he could definitely trust to stay cooped up in his house on a Sunday, and the others mattered little. As long as Rin would not have to see Haru or the green cuckoo, he would be fine… and on second thought, he did have one errand that begged to be completed as soon as possible.

“Fine. I need to go food shopping anyway,” he said, turning his head to glare down the patch of wet tiles in front of him.

“Eh?” blurted Aiichiro in shock, not used to getting his way so easily.

“I’ll get dressed and then we’ll go,” said Rin, his fingers slowing to a crawl in his wet hair. His jaw clenched in thought. “But you had better make it quick.”

“Y-Yes! Of course!” cried Aiichiro, his cheeks tinged pink in joy.

“Hurry up, then,” replied Rin as he stuck his head under the water again, all tension leaving his shoulders as foam trickled down them in soft white streaks. He had given his consent and bound himself by word. There was nothing left to do but to follow the other’s lead, and having no better plans of his own, Rin was now sufficiently glad to adopt Nitori’s as his own. After all, the alternative would have been to sit alone in their dorm room with his mind too full of memories, and nothing to properly suppress them. In comparison, an outing could even be considered a blessing.

* * *

Unfortunately for Rin, fate dictated that his outing would not be without vexation. As soon as he and Nitori glimpsed the gate leading off campus, the first omen of having made a bad decision showed up in the guise of Mikoshiba Seijuurou, who passed him and Nitori with a Cheshire Cat grin, much like the one they had seen every day while Kou stayed at the indoor sports facility during training camp. Rin could not say with full certainty that such was the connection between Kou’s presence and that obnoxious expression on Mikoshiba’s face, but Rin’s first thought upon seeing him was that Seijuurou would make a terrible addition to family gatherings, and the idea left him cringing in silence.

“The captain looks awful cheerful,” noted Aiichiro, his eyes narrowing as he picked up irritated vibrations from his senpai.

“Something about that grin makes me want to strangle him,” muttered Rin with a grim look, his brow flattening when he realized he and Nitori were obliged to follow the captain on their way off campus. Seijuurou seemed to have anticipated their every move. He led them right to the nearest train station, where he walked to the far end of the platform and broke out his phone to send a message. Not to be noticed, Rin and Aiichiro parked themselves behind a pillar, where Rin was at his leisure to glare at the captain from behind his cover. Mikoshiba seemed oblivious of their unflattering attention, which was just as well.

Once they boarded the train, Seijuurou and the others ended up in different coaches. Rin threw himself down on the nearest seat with a huff and Aiichiro perched himself beside him, his empty backpack pressed to his chest.

“Senpai, are you alright?” he asked quietly. Rin scoffed.

“I’m fine,” he muttered under his breath, glaring in front of himself for the entire duration of the train ride.

He paid little attention to Nitori as the other made attempts to chase away the silence with idle talk, but he didn’t need to. Troubled as his senpai looked, Aiichiro expected little more from him than his presence, using his audience as a wall to bounce his thoughts and ideas off of as he rambled about summer vacation, his newest training regimen, or the video games he looked forward to playing until the start of the second term in September. Rin nodded when he perceived a pause in the other’s speech, his mind soon bogged with loose figures, names of places he had never visited, and trivia for games he had never played. By the time he and Aiichiro had gotten off the train, they had so immersed themselves in Aiichiro’s vacation plans that neither noticed how Seijuurou was swarmed on his arrival to the platform by two lovesick siblings, a boy and girl a few years his juniors.

* * *

Rin and Aiichiro soon arrived at Iwatobi Mall, where Aiichiro was forced to confess he was planning to buy a lot more groceries than was wise for him to lug around while he took care of every other errand on his list. As Rin had only agreed to come along for food shopping, Aiichiro half expected his senpai to shake him off, purchase his own groceries, then leave for the train station on his own, but he was in luck. Rin frowned at the idea of dawdling around, but after some consideration, he decided to tag along.

“It’s fine, just make it quick,” he mumbled, his tone a little softer than before. Aiichiro beamed at him.

“Of course! I’ll be super fast!” he promised, his backpack jumping on his shoulders as he smacked his hand onto his heart. Rin rolled his eyes.

“Well, get on, then,” he nudged him. Nitori blushed and nodded.

Their first stop was the stationary store for ink, a new eraser, and what appeared to be a lock-and-key diary book. Next, they visited a drug store, where Aiichiro restocked on deodorant and tooth paste. He also grabbed a toothbrush and a large pack of batteries on the way, then fiddled with a large collection of coupons at the cashier’s. Rin waited behind him with uncharacteristic patience, his eyes scanning a nearby shelf of colognes, but when Aiichiro said goodbye to the cashier and walked out with another plastic bag in his hands, Rin finally smacked the back of his hand lightly against Nitori’s backpack.

“What do you have this on for if you’re not gonna use it,” he muttered. Nitori laughed in embarrassment.

“Oh, I guess I forgot about it…” he mumbled sheepishly. Rin sighed and unzipped the backpack with a sharp tug, taking Nitori’s bags from those small, grasping hands and slipping the items into the front compartment one by one, until he managed to fit them as neatly as Tetris blocks. He scrunched up the plastic bags and stuffed them in his pocket. Having been spared from putting them away himself, Aiichiro thanked him with a grin.

“Can we get our groceries now?” sighed Rin as he pulled the zipper back in place. Aiichiro turned around to face him.

“I was thinking we could have an early lunch now, Senpai,” he said in a tentative tone. “We could get the groceries afterwards so we wouldn’t have to carry them around so much, you see…”

“You have a backpack, you probably don’t feel them at all,” groused Rin. Aiichiro’s brow furrowed.

“I would definitely feel all the things I have to buy!” he told Rin, who marveled at how stubborn his kouhai could be.

“Fine. Lunch, then,” he said, one hand rubbing at his temple as he looked around. “Is there a food court here or something?”

“Yup! It’s on the next floor.”

“Go on, then…” urged Rin. Aiichiro promptly set off towards the escalator, but just as they turned around the corner, Nitori skidded to a halt and let out a huge gasp.

“Senpai.. _look..!_ ” he squeaked, his hands clenched into excited fists by his chest. Rin quirked a brow as he peered over his kouhai’s head. Just opposite Nitori loomed a well-stocked pet store, a large cage of puppies in its window. Aiichiro hurried over to take a better look. Rin followed him reluctantly, stopping just behind him as Nitori crouched down, leaning so close his nose pressed against the glass. The puppies congregated around him with excited yips and Aiichiro clapped his hands onto his cheeks, as though no greater honor had ever been bestowed on him.

“All of you are so cute, yes you are,” he cooed shamelessly. Above him, Rin rolled his eyes, then let out a strangled noise. In the deepest corner of the pet store reserved for fish, he could make out two figures standing by the tanks with their backs turned to him – one thin and black-haired, and the other large and tall with a spiky mop of olive green hair…

Rin shoved his hand against what he hoped would be Nitori’s shoulder, but managed to smack him in the back of his head instead. Aiichiro let out a small yelp when his forehead bonked against the glass.

“Ow.. Senpai..?” he groaned as he rose upward, drawing the eyes of the puppies along. “What’s wrong?”

Rin pointed inside wordlessly. Aiichiro followed his finger and choked.

“N-Nanase-san and Ta—”

“ _Him…_ ” hissed Rin, his vision clouded crimson. Inside, the owner of the shop had just bent down, soon handing a large cardboard box to the cuckoo from the lowest shelf, no doubt containing an empty tank.

“This is a surprise… I wonder what fish they’ll buy,” said Aiichiro, unaware it was the least appropriate comment he could have made, at least until Rin reached out and seized him by the hanger of his backpack to tug him away from the window.

“We’re leaving,” growled Rin as he picked up speed, and not wanting to be dragged on the floor, Aiichiro turned around to scamper after him.

* * *

Five minutes later, they exited Iwatobi Mall and ran across the street, hiding themselves away in the first buffet in their path.

“At least this is nice,” risked Aiichiro with a sheepish smile as he and Rin squeezed themselves behind a table in the corner. Rin scoffed and picked up the menu, flipping it open with a flick of his wrist, then holding it up to their faces for cover.

At least the menu promised meat, a small but acceptable consolation prize for a peaceful mall trip ruined by Haru, who to Rin’s knowledge had never owned a pet, yet suddenly appeared in a pet store to buy a fish tank with the impostor. Worst of all, Nagisa and Rei were nowhere to be found, so it was definitely _not_ a club activity, which led Rin to conclude with a bitter heart that Haru was simply tagging along of his own volition. _Why…?_

His fingers slackened and the menu would have slipped, had it not been for Aiichiro still holding it up. Rin’s brow creased. Aiichiro’s features softened.

“Do you like dogs, Matsuoka-senpai?” he asked in the hopes of diverting his senpai’s attention to more pleasant topics. Rin’s eyes widened.

“I’m.. Yeah…” he said quietly, his shoulders drooping as he thought of Australia, his younger self, and many evenings of curling up on the couch with the friendliest dog he had ever met.

* * *

After their meal, which brought no more nuisances in the shape of former friends or loathsome strangers, Rin and Aiichiro settled on the nearest supermarket to do their grocery shopping, at which point Aiichiro produced a grocery list from his pocket that seemed to sprawl over both sides of the long paper strip in his hand.

“Let’s see…” he murmured as he looked it over, while Rin jammed a coin into the slot of the nearest grocery cart and yanked it free from its row, guiding it over to Nitori with ease. “There’s mints.. and gummies… and then I need milk, aaand—”

“Give me that!” snapped Rin, snatching the note from Nitori’s hand. His eyes narrowed as he glared the items down. “Huh?! These are not in order at all!”

“I j-just wrote them down as they came to mind,” stammered Aiichiro. Rin groaned.

“You’ll never get things done if you don’t organize your stuff! How many times do I have to tell you that?!”

“There’s no need to shout like that, Senpai!” Nitori whined right back at him. Rin huffed.

“Fine… I’ll take care of the list if you push the cart.”

“M-Matsuoka-senpai... Yes, of course, whatever you say!” gushed Aiichiro with a grateful smile, obediently grabbing hold of the cart’s handle. He now looked to Rin with an eager face. Rin rolled his eyes.

“But you’ll have to tell me where the gummies are or get them yourself. I have no idea where they keep that crap,” he grumbled, receiving a nod in reply, but once they gathered everything essential, including four cans of on-sale mackerel, Rin mysteriously happened upon the candy isle anyway, where he tossed the chosen gummies into the cart without a word.

* * *

That evening, Aiichiro penned his latest diary entry with one of his freshly refilled pens, the new, crisp diary book awaiting its debut on the first of August to give it a proper start.

_July 21. Today was amazing! Matsuoka-senpai is officially a member of the Samezuka relay team! I expected nothing less from Senpai!!! He is the fastest backstroke swimmer after all!! Nanase-san and his team will have to work very hard to even stand a chance!! Speaking of Nanase-san, Matsuoka-senpai and I went to Iwatobi Mall today to run errands and we saw him and Tachibana-san at the pet store. They purchased a fish tank together. Tachibana-san was carrying it to the counter, but I’m not sure if he was buying it or if he was just helping Nanase-san. Senpai got angry so we had to leave. I get the feeling Senpai doesn’t like Tachibana-san at all._

_At least Matsuoka-senpai and I got to eat together at a buffet! Eating out with Senpai was great! He told me a little about his time in Australia, where his homestay parents had a dog called Winnie. I never thought Senpai was a dog person… from the way he takes care of that stray cat he had found last week, I would have thought he was more of a cat person. Matsuoka-senpai bought a lot of canned mackerel today and told me to go ahead to the dorm, but I snuck after him, and just as I thought, he was taking the cans to the abandoned school building where he keeps the cat. Senpai never ceases to amaze me. Normally he’s really rude and kind of acts like a delinquent, but all in all he’s hard-working and cool-looking and a really nice guy!_

“He’s completely perfect…!” sighed Aiichiro dreamily as he scribbled his final line.

“Who’s perfect?” came Rin’s voice from below.

“P-P-Peruff.. _N-Nothing!_ ” stammered Nitori as he slammed his diary shut and shoved it under his pillow, burying his face in his hands for fear their embarrassed glow might paint the whole room red.


	51. EPISODE 10: Disparate Heart Rate! - Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **_December. 20.. 2008._ **

_The last month of the year had officially begun, the first day falling conveniently on a Monday. Three more weeks, and the second term would be over. Then, after two weeks of winter vacation, there would be a scant three months left of sixth grade._

_The deadline for submitting applications to study abroad ended yesterday at midnight, and now that his own application awaited approval, Rin felt the time was as good as any to confess his future plans to Sousuke. They were walking home from the Sano Swimming Club just as they had always done after practice, a thin layer of freshly fallen snow crunching underneath their boots._

_“I decided to go abroad in April. To join a swimming school,” said Rin, his voice feather-light as the words filled him with the grandeur and excitement desirable large-scale changes often brought to children his age. Sousuke didn’t look surprised at all._

_“I see. Got it,” he replied._

_Rin’s lips curled into a relieved smile. He half expected an argument, but instead received a simple acknowledgement of his decision, which was probably the most Sousuke could do for him at the moment._

_“There’s lots of fast swimmers out there,” added Sousuke._

_“Yeah,” said Rin. “I’ll show them, though. I’m not fast enough yet, but I’ll prove to them that hard work can surpass any talent! Before I go there though, there’s one last thing…” he continued, but the words drifted into silence then._ One life-changing news at a time _, Rin told himself, knowing his friend needed time to process what he had heard – that where Sousuke said little, he usually thought a great deal more._

_And so, three days later, on his visit to Sousuke’s house, Rin picked up where he had left off._

_“I decided to move to Grandma’s house in Iwatobi,” he said, his mood as sunny as the streets were heavy with snow and sludge. He had made up his mind, his family agreed to his terms, and new challenges awaited him. All things considered, he could not have been happier._

_“…I see. Got it,” replied Sousuke._

_“Before I go abroad, I want to join the Iwatobi Swimming Club no matter what. It’s where Dad used to swim.”_

_“Is it for the sake of chasing your Dad’s dream, then?” asked Sousuke, his brow furrowed._

_Rin pursed his lips. Was Sousuke scolding him?_

_“I don’t know,” he shrugged, a little miffed that Sousuke seemed to think Rin wouldn’t embrace the Olympic stage every bit as fervently as his father must have wanted it in his youth. “But, maybe, if I swam a relay with the guys who go there, I would feel a little closer to Dad and his dream.”_

_“Why a relay?”_

_“Because when Dad was in sixth grade, he won the medley relay. Mom said there’s even a picture of him at the Iwatobi Swimming Club from when he had won. And I, I want my picture there, too! Right next to his.”_

_“With Nanase on it, right?” teased Sousuke, or so Rin wanted to believe. His face seemed a little too guarded for jests._

_“Shut up,” laughed Rin, though he turned his eyes away until the sear of his cheeks cooled down a bit. “In the next tournament, we’ll have a showdown in the medley relay,” he said next. Sousuke gave him a funny look._

_“Nanase is free, so you will be fly, huh?”_

_“I think so. You will swim fly too, right?”_

_“Yeah, and better than you at that.”_

_Rin laughed. Sousuke did too._

If only he had known he was in for a bitter surprise.

* * *

_And so, once the new year began and the third trimester started, Rin was ready to make his debut at Iwatobi Elementary School. The moment he entered his new classroom, he joined the homeroom teacher by the blackboard, where he waited for her to announce his admission into Class One. As he stood there, his eyes drifted to the students. Most of them stared back at the newcomer in anticipation, but all Rin noticed was how one student visibly shrank behind the boy sitting in front of them, their face now hidden from view. Rin quirked his brow._

_“Good day, class,” said the homeroom teacher._

_“Good day, Komori-sensei,” replied the children._

_“We have a new student joining us for the final term,” said their teacher, turning to Rin with a smile. “Please write your name on the blackboard and introduce yourself.”_

_Rin nodded as he picked up the largest piece of chalk, then mapped his name in huge kanji onto the board. Some students broke into hushed whispers in the back. Rin turned around to complete his introduction._

_“Hello, everyone,” he said loudly, putting as much energy into his words as possible. “My name is Matsuoka Rin. I previously went to Sano Elementary School. I have a girly name, but I’m a **boy!** ” he continued, placing special emphasis on the last word. He then took a swift bow. “Looking forward to being in this class!”_

_The others fell silent, a little uncomfortably so, but Rin could hardly blame them, being an out-of-season transfer student with a girly name. He straightened, having resigned himself to the idea that he would be answering a lot of questions later on… to finally see the face of the student who tried to hide from him earlier. It was Nanase Haruka, staring at him with a look of complete shock on his face. Rin broke into a toothy grin. He knew Nanase went to Iwatobi Elementary, but Rin did not dare hope they would be in the same class._ This must be a sign, _he told himself, a sign that Lady Luck had chosen to smile on him._

* * *

_During recess, most of his classmates gathered around Rin to ask questions, which were answered readily with a smile. In fact, everyone showed interest in some shape or form except Nanase, who either turned his head away each time, or stood up and left the classroom until the bell for next period brought him back. Rin thought his behavior a little odd, but it also amused him._ Just as unsociable as always _, he thought to himself._

_When lunch break came, Rin decided to take matters into his own hands. Grabbing his bento, he followed his elusive object to the school yard, where he found Nanase sitting under the cherry tree by the school’s shallow pool, the water strewn with dead leaves and thin cobwebs of ice. Rin walked over, smiling as innocuously as he could. He received a hostile glare, but it was fine. Rin expected nothing less._

_“Wow, this tree is huge,” said Rin, hoping to break the ice formed around Nanase. “Is it a cherry tree?”_

_Nanase stared back at him like he had never heard a more redundant question. Rin took his silence as a yes. He placed a hand on the trunk of the tree, glancing up at the sky through the tangle of its branches._

_“Hey, does that mean that when it's spring and the cherry blossoms fall, a lot will fall into the pool? That would be so cool… I wanna swim in a pool of cherry blossoms…” he said, a flurry of emotions stirring in his chest. Nanase looked as shocked as he had been in class._

_“You plan to still be here next year?” he asked, or so Rin thought he did, as the wind swept past right at that moment and blew Nanase’s voice away._

_“I was just joking around,” replied Rin, a little embarrassed at himself for being such a hopeless romantic. Nanase glared at him._

_“I have a question for you,” he said, his eyes hard as steel._

_“What’s with that scary look?” laughed Rin to lighten the mood, but Nanase’s face remained as stern as ever. “Well, what it is? Are you going to call out the transfer student on his first day?”_

_Nanase’s eyes bore holes into him._

_“I’ve seen you before… at swim meets.”_

_Rin could feel his face heat up. Though he and Nanase had attended several swim meets together, they never had a conversation before._ And yet…!

_“Oh, you remembered me?!” he cried in joy. Nanase furrowed his brow something fierce._

_“Don’t look at me like that,” Rin laughed as he held up his hands defensively. “It was a coincidence, seriously, a coincidence! I just happened to end up at this school when I moved. I was surprised, too! I never thought I’d end up in the same class as you. Coincidences are pretty scary, huh?”_

_Nanase didn’t reply._

* * *

_The next day, Rin joined the Iwatobi Swimming Club. He was soon taken to the pool, to introduce himself to the group currently in session – a group that just happened to include Nanase Haruka._

_“My name is Matsuoka Rin. I came here from the Sano Swimming Club. I have a girly name, but I'm a **boy!** I hope we all get along!”_

_On his first chance, he lined up behind Nanase by the blocks._

_“Man… coincidence after coincidence,” he mused out loud to the back of Nanase’s head. “I transferred to your school and even ended up in the same swimming club. Who would have thought?”_

_Nanase dived in without a reply, but even so, Rin could not help but feel his lips twitch upward excitedly as he watched the other swim. Nanase’s form looked just as amazing as he had remembered._

_When Nanase left the lane, Rin launched forward eagerly to take his place. He swam a thousand meters of front crawl undisturbed, but the moment he stopped to rest, he felt a pair of eyes upon him. He looked up to see a young blond boy crouched by the poolside, his eyes large and round like a puppy’s. Rin stared back at him. The boy didn’t even blink._

_“What?” asked Rin, a little annoyed at his impromptu audience._

_“Matsuoka-kun, are you Nanase-kun’s friend?” asked the boy, his gaze unwavering._

_“I wouldn’t say we’re friends. We’re more like rivals,” replied Rin._

_“What do you mean, rivals?”_

_“It means we race each other,” explained Rin as he hoisted himself out of the pool, then turned away from the blocks. The boy rose up, obviously ready to follow him. Looking back, Rin could not help but marvel at what a scrawny little creature he was._ Maybe he’s in fourth grade _, he thought to himself._

_“And which one of you is faster?” asked the shrimp. Rin pursed his lips, but after a moment’s consideration, his lips widened in a sharp grin._

_“Come with me and I’ll show you,” he said to the boy. “What’s your name?”_

_“Hazuki Nagisa! I’m in fifth grade, and I am the best breaststroke swimmer in my class! I can swim five hundred meters in one go! Pretty cool, huh?”_

What a little braggart, _thought Rin._ Unbelievable.

_“You’ll be timing us, Hazuki,” he told the boy as they walked away from the block, heading towards the lane where Nanase was standing in line. Rin stepped to the neighboring lane, flashing a challenging smirk. Nanase glared. Hazuki bounced on his heels._

_“You’re going to race, Nanase-kun, and I’m gonna time you to see who’s faster!” he told Nanase, who turned his head archly. Rin shook his head at Hazuki, then hooked a finger into the strap of his goggles, pulling it back sharply until it snapped into place._

_Hazuki exchanged a few words with the boy who had been timing swimmers in Nanase’s lane, and once he received the boy’s stopwatch, Rin and Nanase curled into position on their respective blocks._

_“Ready… Set… Go!”_

_The two of them launched forward, breaking into a dolphin kick the moment they hit the water._ You’d better not go easy on me, _Rin spurred Nanase in his mind as they both shifted into front crawl._ Come on, sink your teeth into it!

_He was not disappointed. At the start, Nanase managed to gain on him considerably, but Rin’s stronger dolphin kick soon brought him within half a body-length of Nanase, until the two tumbled in perfect synch. It was then that Rin’s kick launched him into the lead. He could feel Nanase’s hands drawing level with his waist, but not for long. On the last fifteen meters, Nanase’s swimming changed. His stroke hadn’t become faster or more powerful, but even so, Rin could feel his drive, a burst of energy that propelled him forward._

_With ten meters left, Nanase closed the distance, the two dead even until Rin found himself pursuing his opponent like a tired hound on a hunt…_

_Their hands touched the wall. Rin whipped his head up._

_“Who was it?!” he cried at once._

_Hazuki pointed wordlessly at Nanase, who didn’t even seem out of breath as he climbed out of the pool, while Rin could still feel his lungs cry for air. Nanase plucked the stopwatch from Hazuki’s hand, who let him claim it without a word._

_“You were so cool, Nanase-kun! I wanna swim like you…!” he breathed in awe._

_“Your swimming was beautiful, Nanase-senpai!” came another voice from further away, but Rin didn’t so much as look, his eyes fixed on the stopwatch._

_“Well, what was your time for the hundred meter?” he asked. Nanase returned the stopwatch to Hazuki, then left the block. Hazuki looked down at the screen._

_“He reset it,” he said wide-eyed._

_Rin scoffed, sinking deeper into the water in annoyance, but even so, a nervous energy bubbled up with in him, his body feeling so light he could have floated to the ceiling._

_Nanase dived into the next lane, and too tired to follow, Rin simply watched him swim._

* * *

_“Ah, that was a good swim!” sighed Rin contentedly as he walked past Nanase and Hazuki on the way out. He received no answer. “And now for a good run home.”_

_“Do you live far, Matsuoka-kun?” asked Hazuki. Rin turned back to them with a meaningful look. Nanase turned his head._

_“About three kilometers,” replied Rin, laughing inside at how surprised Hazuki looked. “It’s not too bad. And hey, it’ll make my kick even stronger,” he said, winking at Nanase, who glared back at him almost offended. “Well, see you!”_

_Rin then took off at a light jog, leaving Nanase and Hazuki behind._

_The next day, Nanase’s cheeks looked reddish, and he sounded out of breath when he arrived to class, as if he had been exerting himself… say, by running, just as Rin had hoped he would._

_By Thursday, though, Rin began to suspect that Nanase might have caught a chill from running in the dead of winter. Not that Nanase said so. If anything, he ignored everyone who made any comment about his flushed cheeks and tired eyes._

* * *

_That Friday, Komori-sensei announced that their homeroom theme for the day was “Commemorating Our Graduation.” At her request, the class formed into groups to discuss their ideas, which would be voted on until they arrived at a single graduation project, to be completed by the end of March. After a round of negotiations with his classroom neighbor, Rin managed to squeeze himself into the group that included Nanase, but while the others looked eager, Nanase spoke little and seemed to care even less. Rin, on the other hand, felt he had the perfect idea for his class._

_“I think we should write messages and put them in a time capsule, and then bury it in the school yard,” he suggested, his face beaming at his own brilliance. “Then in a few years we could come back for a reunion, dig out the time capsule and read about all our hopes and dreams and the friendships we cherished at school. Would be pretty cool, huh?”_

_His group mates seemed convinced, all except one of course, but even so, Rin kept grinning not to lose his steam._

_When it was his group’s turn, Rin was chosen to relay his idea to the rest of the class. Rin spoke well, and received so many compliments he could almost taste his victory. Almost. It was now the last group’s turn to speak, so Yazaki Aki raised her hand._

_“Um, I’ve been thinking about this for a while now, and I think the only flowers that bloom around the school are from the cherry tree, right?” she began, her tone tentative. “It’s really beautiful in bloom in the spring, but right now it’s sort of sad and lonely… so we were thinking, what if we planted a flowerbed around the cherry tree? Then there could be lots of bright-colored flowers blooming with the cherry tree in spring.”_

_To Rin’s chagrin and Nanase’s apparent surprise, the idea found general support. The majority of the class ended up voting in favor of the flowerbed, yet when all was said and done, Rin felt no irritation at being snubbed. Quite the contrary. As they cast their votes on each idea, Nanase, hostile, taciturn, uncaring Nanase ended up raising his hand in favor of the time capsule, unwittingly making Rin the happiest person in the room._

* * *

_Well, at least until the afternoon, when Rin reached the Mutsuki Bridge he had to cross on his way to the swimming club. Yazaki stood by the edge of the riverbank, staring downwards so intently Rin joined her side out of sheer curiosity. His eyes widened as they fell on Nanase below, who was steadily inching downwards on the slope of the riverbank._

_“What’s he doing?” asked Rin, brow quirked._

_“My muffler fell into the river yesterday. I was really upset, but Nanase-kun said I had to give it up, so I didn’t go after it, but now we’ve spotted it again, and he said he would get it, even though I said he didn’t have to,” explained Yazaki with a self-conscious look on her face. Rin turned from her to watch Nanase, his heart hammering._

What is that guy thinking, _thought Rin._ If he’s not careful, he’s gonna—!

_It all happened in the blink of an eye. One moment, Nanase was hanging onto the rocks and tufts of grass on the slope, and the next he grew limp and lost his balance, tumbling down the embankment like a crumbling boulder. On the bottom, the ice cracked with a sickly crunch under the force of his fall, his body sinking into the river._

_Yazaki screamed. Rin’s mouth opened too, but he couldn’t so much as make a sound. His body went numb, as though time had stopped around him and he now floated on the edge of a nightmare, forced to watch as the water claimed Nanase inch by fragile inch. His fingers were growing limp around a tuft of grass anchoring him to the riverbank, his other hand helplessly tangled into a sepia scarf._

_They watched in horror as Nanase lost his grip and his body drifted away from the bank, but the sound of Yazaki’s scream had apparently alerted a man nearby, who soon came rushing past them and into the water to save the fallen child. He entered the water and waded towards Nanase with swift strides, managing to reach the boy just in time before the waves might have carried him away for good._

_As the man grabbed onto Nanase’s coat and pulled him into his arms, Yazaki seemed to thaw from her state of shock. With shaking hands, she took out her phone to call an ambulance, but as she struggled to speak, another man, wearing the same sort of clothes as the first one, gently claimed her phone to give precise instructions to the operators._

_Rin still stood thunderstruck as sirens started roaring in the distance, his shoulders slumping at the sight of Nanase in the other man’s arms, deathly pale and barely breathing._

* * *

_Rin and Yazaki spent an eternity at the hospital waiting for Nanase to wake up, Rin’s eyes never leaving his pale face as he listened to the other’s ragged breathing. Yazaki occasionally threw a guilty look at the scarf drying beside them, then wiped her eyes. The silence between them felt unbearable, but each time Rin gathered his courage to speak, his throat clamped shut until the words died on his tongue. What was even there for Rin to say, when all he did was stare as that man rushed down while Yazaki and that other guy called the ambulance? The thought that Yazaki had done more for Nanase than he did shamed Rin deeply._ If only…

_Nanase’s eyes flickered open at last, but they seemed out of focus._

_“Where… am I?”_

_“You’re at the hospital,” replied Yazaki, her voice no louder than a whisper._

_“The hospital..?”_

_“You fell into the river,” explained Rin as Yazaki rubbed her eyes with her fist. “A man saved you and Yazaki called an ambulance.”_

_Yazaki tensed. A moment later, she pushed herself off the chair to leave the room, her shoulders quaking. Nanase’s eyes followed her until she disappeared, then drifted to Rin, who tensed under the silent plea on Nanase’s face. As much as he loathed to leave, Rin supposed someone had to tell Yazaki that things would be fine, that no one blamed or hated her for the stupid scarf that nearly lured Nanase into an early grave._

_“I’ll go after her,” he mumbled as he rose from his seat. Nanase’s face softened._

_“Matsuoka… thanks,” he whispered. It was the first time he had spoken Rin’s name, and his voice had never sounded so genuine before, but unable to smile, Rin merely nodded as he turned away to chase down Yazaki._

* * *

_A few days later, Rin learned from Yazaki that Nanase was to stay at the hospital for at least two weeks. Yazaki had apparently visited him in hospital to bring some oranges as a get-well present, but instead ran into Nanase’s mother, who relayed the news to her, then told Yazaki to keep the visit brief not to tire her son, who was now bedridden with a forty degree fever at the onset of pneumonia._

_Rin nodded with a heavy heart, unable to help but think that his dreams of swimming a relay had been taken from him, just like that._

* * *

_Rin counted the days until Nanase’s return, but after two weeks of staying at the hospital, Nanase was merely taken home, to recuperate for at least another week. Again, Rin had to hear it from Yazaki, and again he felt that same pang of having lost everything before he could so much as ask Nanase to swim a relay. The next swim meet was to be at the end of March, just before Rin would have to leave. Would Nanase be alright by then? And even if he recovered quickly enough and agreed to swim with Rin… would they find two more people in time to complete their team?_

_Fortunately for Rin, there was much for him to do while he waited for Nanase’s return. He continued to attend the Iwatobi Swimming Club, sometimes by himself and sometimes pestered by Hazuki, who kept asking where Nanase was, if Rin would watch him swim breaststroke, what Rin’s specialties were, or which stroke he was best at. Rin’s answers were humorless and curt, but even so, Hazuki came over each practice in an attempt to engage him. Then, once he had enough of Rin’s barbs, he returned to his own group to chatter at someone else… another boy, in fact, the same boy over and over again. Rin soon remembered him by his red goggles, which he always kept on whether in or out of the water, and the fact that Rin had never seen him swim anything except butterfly. Rin sometimes watched him swim. Though he didn’t want to admit, it made him feel a little less lonely. Even after moving away, butterfly still reminded him of Sousuke._

_Life at Iwatobi Elementary also supplied Rin with plenty of distractions. Once Yazaki’s motion for planting a flowerbed officially passed, even without Nanase’s vote, Komori-sensei and her students made preparations to realize her idea. First, Komori-sensei asked the school board’s permission to install the flowerbed, and her request was granted at the next school board meeting. Next, they plotted out the area around the tree, then decided on the dimensions of the flowerbed to calculate how much material they would need. The school board placed an order based on their calculations, and one week later, a large amount of clay arrived to Komori-sensei’s class._

_Before long, the classroom turned into a brick-making workshop. After sixth period was over, all the desks were pushed into the back, a blue tarpaulin spread in the middle, and the clay piled onto it in robust mounds so the children could scoop and knead it for their individual bricks. The clay looked rather dull in color, which saddened Rin, but once Komori-sensei informed them that upon baking, the iron inside it would oxidize and turn their finished bricks bright red, he perked up instantly. After some careful thought, Rin signed up for the last group to make their bricks that week. The oven they used could only dry so many bricks at once, and though Rin mentioned this to no one, he kept hoping Nanase would return by the time it was his group’s turn to work with the clay._

_Again, he was in luck. Komori-sensei called Nanase’s house to ask if her student might be well enough to make a brick himself, and Nanase’s mother apparently agreed to bring him in for one afternoon only. They appeared the next day after school, the mother looking apprehensive and Nanase extremely uncomfortable, a large thick scarf wrapped around his neck in layers._

_“Ah, Nanase-san and Nanase-kun!” Komori-sensei greeted them. “I’m glad you could come.”_

_“Yes. You do understand that my son is still ill,” began Nanase’s mother, her son turning his head in embarrassment. Rin felt for him, he really did. “As soon as he is done, I’ll be taking him home.”_

_“Of course. Please, do sit down and rest while we work,” bowed Komori-sensei, placing a hand on the boy’s shoulder next. “Come, Nanase-kun, we are just about to start.”_

_Nanase’s mother sat down on a chair in the back. Rin tensed. If he was feeling nervous in her presence, how did Nanase feel, having to live with her?_

_He shook his head roughly. Who cared how they felt? Nanase was here at last. That was all that mattered._

_“Hey, Nanase,” whispered Rin as they kneaded their lumps of clay side by side, Nanase’s thin hands trembling a little as he tackled the clay. He lifted his eyes just barely to peer at Rin, but that was enough to carry conversation._

_“Listen,” continued Rin in a hushed tone, “the next swim meet will be in March, just after the graduation ceremony. How about we swim a medley relay together?”_

_“I only swim free,” replied Nanase, his gaze dropping to the clay in his hands._

_“Jeez, you’re obsessive, Nanase,” murmured Rin, but excitement stretched his face into a grin regardless. “Fine, then you can be the freestyle specialist. I can swim any stroke, so we just have to find two other guys and we’re all set!”_

_Nanase turned to glare at him._

_“I said I only swim free. Don’t just go ahead and put me in a relay,” he said, his tone quiet but firm. Rin furrowed his brow. After having waited so long, his patience finally wore off like a feeble spell._

_“That’s why I said that you can do **free!** ” he snapped at Nanase, his final words loud enough to turn all attention to him. Nanase’s mother glared at him from the back. He could feel her hard blue eyes like a million pin pricks down his spine._

_“Eh… heheh… I uh, I just said to Nanase,” he stammered, one hand scratching nervously at the back of his head, “that… that we should write messages on the bricks! Like, words we like and stuff. We could even draw on them if we wanted. J-Just let your imagination fly… **freely..!** ”_

_The others continued to stare at him, but just as Rin began to regret his foolish attempt to cover up, Yazaki Aki stood up, drawing the attention of her fellow students._

_“I think that’s a wonderful idea,” she said with a smile, and since she was the mastermind behind the flowerbed, her approval sparked excited conversation across the workshop._

_“Lovely! Nice one, Matsuoka!” came voices of encouragement from all around Rin, who smiled bashfully at the attention, his hand still rubbing the back of his head._

_“We shall tell the entire class tomorrow and put it to a vote,” agreed Komori-sensei, and since no more could be done at present, Rin picked up his clay again to knead it in silence, the subject of the relay closed for the present._

_When he arrived home afterwards, his grandmother grabbed his shoulder and pulled him in front of the mirror, to show him that the back of his hair had turned gray from all the clay he rubbed into it in his attempt to achieve composure in front of the others._

* * *

_Nanase was forced to go home the moment his brick took its proper shape, and it was only at the beginning of February that he returned to the Iwatobi Swimming Club. It was the second of February, in fact, and starved for positive thought, Rin looked upon Nanase’s return as a birthday present from fate. Nanase arrived just as he did, so the two walked to the locker room together, Rin soon growing keenly conscious of how much pneumonia had taken its toll on Nanase. He had always been slender, but as he undressed, Rin could count each of his ribs, while his stomach looked concave._

_Rin frowned. On the day he had mentioned running, he merely wanted to inspire Nanase to train, to build muscle so he could strengthen his kick and improve his stamina in the process, but Rin now had to face the fact that running was out of the question for Nanase. Rin could consider himself lucky if Nanase regained even his original form in time for the relay, if he could be persuaded to swim at all. Rin blamed the cold weather and the winter gales. He had been in the habit of running, so he managed to build some resistance to the elements, but Nanase evidently didn’t. The first session must have brought on a cold, which his accident made worse, much worse. Rin’s frown deepened. Was Nanase even fit to be here right now..?_

_“Nanase…” he said, his voice quiet, but his fists firmly clenched. “Have you considered what I said?”_

_Nanase’s brow creased. Rin suppressed a groan._

_“About swimming a medley relay with me at the next swim meet,” he explained, his tone verging on desperate. Nanase huffed._

_“I only swim free. I don’t care about relays,” he replied, his eyes now on his shirt as his thin fingers unbuttoned it little by little. Rin let out an exasperated sigh. It wasn’t the first time he had heard someone important tell him that, but if it stung from Sousuke, it was downright excruciating to hear it from Nanase._

_“But I even told you that you can swim free!” he whined. Nanase turned his head._

_A row away, Rin heard whispers._

* * *

_Unlike Nanase, who could no longer run, and now had to suffer the embarrassment of his mother picking him up at the receptionist’s desk to take him home by car, tiny Hazuki seemed eager to put running on his daily agenda. Rin was still pulling his shoes on when Hazuki passed him by, walking off with the boy he always talked to during practice. Out of the water, the boy wore red glasses. Rin’s eyes widened._

Of course, _he thought, finally enlightened after spending so much time wondering why the boy never removed his goggles inside the pool area._ He must be wearing prescription goggles while swimming, so he just keeps them on to see properly. _Rin squinted. He had been swimming for several weeks now, but he hadn’t heard the boy’s name once, or seen him swim anything except butterfly, even while everyone else was practicing other strokes._ Strange…

 _Rin ran home shortly afterwards, his face scrunching up each time he thought of Nanase’s rejection. He should have told Nanase it was his birthday, to make him nicer by obligation, but Rin rejected the idea the very moment he first thought of it in the locker room. He wanted to win Nanase the_ right _way, even if it cost his blood and sweat._

_At least his grandmother awaited him with a tart cake and beef kebabs. Even Sousuke called him on the phone to wish him happy birthday._

Sousuke…

* * *

_The next day, Rin and Nanase undressed once more, this time in uneasy silence that poisoned the air around them. Thankfully, Rin didn’t have to endure it for long. As if fortune had taken pity on him after so many weeks of hopeless stalemates, Hazuki toddled over to him from the next row, already in his swim shorts and a pair of goggles hung from his neck. He wrung his swimming cap in those tiny hands as he approached Rin._

_“Hey, Matsuoka-kun,” he began, his voice tentative. Rin quirked his brow. “Are you going to swim a medley relay at the next swim meet?”_

_Rin stared at him wide-eyed._ So that’s what the whispering was about…

_“Well, that’s the plan,” he said with a shrug of his shoulders, “but I’m still waiting for Nanase to say yes.”_

_“Do you have the rest of your team, then?”_

_Rin could feel his heart jolt in embarrassment. Between him and the anchor of his choice, they would have still been two members short of a medley relay. The thought pulled his lips into a bitter frown._

_“No. It’s just me and Nanase if he joins.”_

_Hazuki’s eyes grew large and gleaming, peering up at him in excitement Rin felt completely unwarranted._

_“Then let me join you! I’m really fast, and I can get you another swimmer, too!”_

_Tempting as the offer seemed, Rin’s heart prickled in resistance. When he thought back on how much Hazuki had been nagging him to help improve his stroke while simultaneously bragging nonstop about his abilities, Rin felt just a little resentful that life not only gave him lemons, but threw in a small, chattering lime as well._

_“No way,” replied Rin, his chin in the air as he slapped his hands on his hips, twisting away from Hazuki. “I am serious about this. I only want the best swimmers on this team,” he said, his former bravado returning at the thought that his words might stroke Nanase’s ego._

_“But I’m the best at breaststroke in my class!” whined Hazuki._

_“You’re the biggest braggart in your class,” retaliated Rin. Hazuki’s small face scrunched up in a heart-broken pout._

_“Come on, let me join your team!” he pleaded with his small hands clasped around his poor, tortured swimming cap. Crocodile tears brewed in his eyes, threatening to erupt. “Please? Pretty please..?”_

_“Impossible,” replied Rin. “Besides, I bet you’re just mouthing off like always. There’s no way someone like you can get us the member we need.”_

_Hazuki puffed his cheeks so hard his tears came streaming down his face. The next moment, his small chest swelled as he drew a large breath. Rin’s blood curdled. Was Hazuki going to throw a tantrum in front of Nanase?_

_“L-Look, I’m not gonna change my mind—”_

_“_ RYUUGAZAKI-KUUUN!!! _” wailed Hazuki at the top of his lungs, cutting Rin off to leave startled silence in the wake of his scream… except for the sound of bare footsteps in the distance, turning into a screech of naked feet against the tiles as the boy Hazuki always talked to during practice came swerving around the corner. He ran right towards them, his open shirt billowing above his swim shorts as he had rushed off mid-change._

_It all happened so fast Rin could do nothing but stare in shock at Hazuki’s summons._

_“What is it, Hazuki-kun?!” he heard the boy yell as he ran over to them. He took one moment to survey the situation, then reached out a hand to pull teary-faced Hazuki behind him by his arm, his eyes hardening as he glared at Rin._

_Rin choked. He shot a look at Nanase, but the other merely quirked his brow, then resumed unbuttoning his shirt._

_“Is this boy bothering you?” demanded the newcomer, talking to Hazuki but not taking his eyes off Rin, who pursed his lips in a soundless whistle. For these past weeks, he had been convinced this guy was just as annoyed by Hazuki as he was, especially since the two of them appeared to quarrel from time to time, but now he found it was quite the opposite. Rin let out a laugh, which was apparently met with disapproval._

_“I’m fine, Ryuugazaki-kun,” said Hazuki as he inched around his friend, wiping his face absentmindedly like his tears had been purely accidental. “But you have to help me and swim butterfly in the medley relay!”_

_“What?!” blurted Rin and Ryuugazaki in synch. Hazuki clasped his hands together again as he turned to his friend with puppy dog eyes._

_“Matsuoka-kun and Nanase-kun are going to swim a medley relay at the next swim meet, but they won’t let me join unless you join, too!”_

_“H-Hey now, I never said I would take either of you!” snapped Rin, unable to stomach how much Hazuki seemed to take the relay and his own involvement for granted while Rin was still grasping at straws. In the background, Nanase was taking an awful long time fiddling with his goggles. Hazuki puffed his cheeks again._

_“But you definitely have to have Ryuugazaki-kun, he’s the best butterfly swimmer in the fifth grade!”_

_Ryuugazaki flushed._

_“Now, now, Hazuki-kun…” he mumbled bashfully, his smile a little too satisfied at the praise._

_“Ryuugazaki-kun practices his butterfly stroke every day! It’s because he can’t swim anything except butterfly or he’ll sink like a brick, right to the bottom of the pool,” explained Hazuki with a small dive of his hand to show Rin how he should imagine Ryuugazaki sink to the bottom, and Rin had never seen a swifter change of mood than Ryuugazaki going from smug smirking to his face contorting in anger._

_“STOP TELLING PEOPLE THAT!” he screeched, but Hazuki did not so much as flinch._

_“It’s okay, Ryuugazaki-kun,” he said as he took his friend’s hand in his, patting it like a mother might soothe a fussy child. “After all, Nanase-kun only swims free and there’s nothing wrong with that, right?_

_Ryuugazaki’s eyes widened._

_“That’s right! Nanase-senpai is a swimming purist, just like me..!” he gushed, shooting a look of utmost respect at Nanase, who flushed at the unsolicited attention and turned his head. Rin snickered._

_“And that’s the best fifth grade has to offer?” he teased when he finally found his voice again. “A little shrimp and a butterfly made of lead?”_

_Ryuugazaki glared him down as he fixed his glasses._

_“I will have you know… um…”_

_“Matsuoka-kun is in sixth grade,” chimed in Hazuki._

_“…Matsuoka-_ senpai, _” continued Ryuugazaki, the proper honorific drenched in acid, “that though I am gravitationally challenged, I swim an efficient butterfly and I am not afraid to challenge you to a race, if you have the courage to face me!”_

_Rin let out an appreciative whistle._

_“Alright, Ryuugazaki,” he replied with a sly smirk. “You’re on.”_

_“Oh, oh, I know!” chimed in Hazuki, even raising his hand to gain their attention, just as if they were in class. “Fifth graders have time trials today, so we could make a deal! If we place first in breaststroke and butterfly, you have to take us for your team!”_

_Rin cupped his chin between his fingers as he considered the offer, risking a glance at Nanase, who had even put his clothes away by now, yet still stood by his locker, listening to the conversation. It gave Rin hope. His lips widened in a smirk._

_“Alright. Whoever places first can join the team,” he said, unable to contain his amusement at his empty promise. There was no way he would have to keep it, after all, no way that someone like these two could stand a chance…_

_Ryuugazaki cleared his throat. Rin gave him a look._

_“Oh, right, I’ll race you afterwards,” he said with a wave of his hand, but to his surprise, Ryuugazaki shook his head._

_“That’s not it, Matsuoka-senpai,” he said with a stern look. “Am I to understand that if one of us does not place first, he won’t be allowed to join?”_

_“Yup. That’s fair, isn’t it?” replied Rin at once. “After all, if Hazuki’s bragging is true and you two really_ are _the best in your class, placing first won’t be a problem, right?” he teased, only to receive a glare in reply._

_“I cannot agree to that,” said Ryuugazaki, his arms folded over his chest. Even Hazuki was peering up at him in confusion._

_“Ryuugazaki-kun..?” he mumbled, his eyes wide. Ryuugazaki’s cheeks flushed._

_“If you won’t take both of us… then I refuse to join,” he said, his gaze wavering on the tiles, but his fists firmly clenched. “I can tell you are just egging on Hazuki-kun with empty promises when it isn’t even certain that Nanase-senpai will join,” he continued, setting Rin’s blood boiling in frustration at the words he couldn’t refute. “So unless you agree to take both of us, I refuse to join and I will not let Hazuki-kun join either. I will not let him waste himself on someone who calls him a shrimp and belittles him in front of Nanase-senpai!”_

_Hazuki stared up at Ryuugazaki in nothing short of adoration, his rosy cheeks and large eyes worthy of a scene in a romantic comedy, but Rin couldn’t laugh at him. Blood rumbled in his ears. How dare they embarrass him in front of Nanase?_

_“Fine,_ fine already! _” he snapped, his ears too hot. “If either of you place first, you can both join. Does that sound more fair to you,_ Speedo Goggles? _”_

_“S-Speedo Goggles?!” spluttered Ryuugazaki. Rin straightened his shoulders with a haughty look._

_“The first time I noticed you during practice, you were wearing a speedo and wouldn’t take your goggles off even out of the water, so in my mind, you are Speedo Goggles,” he told him with a deadpan expression, as payback for Ryuugazaki’s earlier remarks._

_Ryuugazaki let out a strangled sound, but he seemed to calm down just as fast as he had flared up before. He flashed Rin a calculated smile._

_“Very well, Matsuoka-senpai,” he replied in a condescending tone, “I shall show you that I am not your typical Speedo Goggles at our race!”_

_“Bring it, Ryuugazaki!” retorted Rin, but his own face contorted into a hungry smirk. “I’ll show you what I can do!”_

_“Practice is about to start,” came Nanase’s voice from behind their backs, as calm and quiet as though nothing had happened. Hazuki skipped over to him._

_“Coming! Did you hear, Nanase-kun? We’re gonna place first and then we’re gonna join you!” he chattered excitedly as the two of them left. Rin turned his head. Ryuugazaki was staring at him as he fixed his glasses. It might have been a necessary gesture, yet it felt so pretentious it made Rin roll his eyes._

_“See you after our time-trials, Matsuoka-senpai,” said Ryuugazaki with a challenging look, then broke into a jog in the direction Nanase and Hazuki had gone. Rin bared his teeth._

_“Last one to the pool is a rotten egg!” he cried as he chased after him, hardly knowing why everything about Ryuugazaki screamed_ challenge me, race me, argue with me till you drop!

* * *

_An hour later, time trials ended, leaving Rin gaping in astonishment. Hazuki and Ryuugazaki were the same age, and both came in first at their time trials, but in terms of technique, they could not have been any more different._

_Hazuki started out average, nothing Rin hadn’t seen before. For the first leg, he was even lagging behind the boy swimming next to him._ There’s no way he can reach first _, Rin thought to himself as he watched tiny Hazuki struggle against the taller, larger boy ahead him, but after the turn, something ludicrous happened. Hazuki’s short arms began to extend with each stroke, reaching forward as though he were growing an inch with every sweep of his arms. Just as Rin thought the other would reach the wall first, his arm much longer, it was actually Hazuki’s tiny hand that pulled forward, touching the wall before the other could._ So he’s a wild card, _thought Rin._

 _Rin then watched Ryuugazaki swim, and his earlier prejudices melted like snow in spring. Ryuugazaki might have been able to swim nothing except butterfly, but Rin could tell he had been honing his technique with great dedication. Each and every stroke seemed precisely calculated, delivered with a text book form that looked remarkably graceful for a boy his age._ And this one’s a specialist, _concluded Rin._

_When Ryuugazaki’s time was announced, Hazuki jumped in the air, waving his arms wildly, albeit silently, at Nanase in the distance. Nanase seemed to shrink at the attention. As he turned his head away, Rin sighed, his earlier appreciation of the two boys turning to lethargy. In his pursuit of Nanase since early January, all he managed to secure so far was two fifth graders that promised to annoy him to no end._

* * *

_When practice ended, they took a break, after which Rin stepped up to the block to race Ryuugazaki. The two assumed their places. Hazuki held the stopwatch._

_“Ready… Set… Go!”_

_Rin dived forward in a flash, with only sheer annoyance to fuel his stroke, but as early as twenty meters in, he found himself thrashing forward to keep clear ahead of Ryuugazaki, who chased him relentlessly down the lane and back up again. By the end of the race, Rin was heaving despite his more than apparent victory. Ryuugazaki seemed just as short on air, but still managed a smirk that boiled Rin’s blood again._

_“Never.. underestimate us.. Matsuoka-senpai…” he breathed, his nostrils flaring. Rin laughed breathlessly._

_“I can.. already tell.. that I’m gonna.. hate you,” he huffed, but his own face was stuck in a grin he couldn’t wipe away. Ryuugazaki was certainly a different experience from Nanase…_

_“Are we on the team now?” asked Hazuki, his small hands tugging on Rin’s arm. Rin shot a look at Nanase, who turned his head. Rin sighed._

_“Ask me tomorrow,” he replied. Hazuki’s face scrunched up. Rin’s contorted in irritation. “Ask me tomorrow, alright?!”_

* * *

_Hazuki and Ryuugazaki soon left for the train station, while Nanase’s mother walked her poor, delicate son to the car, offering Rin a ride that he refused with a bow and a quiet thank you. He had no desire to be anywhere near her. Instead he ran off towards the bay, bought himself a can of soda from a nearby vending machine, then sat down on the steps leading to the beach._

_Soon his hand was full of smooth pebbles he picked up from the sand, the empty can set down a few meters away to act as his target. Rin chucked a pebble at it. He missed._

Why is Nanase so obsessed with free? _he asked himself as he hurled another pebble and missed again. That was all Nanase ever said, it seemed to be his nonsense answer to everything, a strange, abstract riddle Rin simply couldn’t crack._

I don’t get it, _he thought bitterly as he threw another pebble that finally hit the can, sending it hurtling away towards the water. Rin raised his arm again, letting his momentum carry him from his seat. His body swayed forward as he swung his arm, sending another pebble flying in one fluid motion towards the froth licking the shore._

_Oh, what Rin wouldn’t have given for a guide, a cheat code to Nanase Haruka’s heart. An all-knowing mind-reader to reveal all his secrets. Someone like a close childhood friend he could have quizzed to understand him, but Nanase had no friends, not a single one. Until he agreed to join, not even Rin would call him his friend. Too much hinged on Nanase’s answer, on his obstinate, headstrong nature, and should he choose to destroy Rin’s hopes of stepping into his father’s footsteps and reviving a long lost, beautiful dream, Rin knew as certain as the sunrise that he would hate Nanase forever._

* * *

_The next day at practice, Hazuki and Ryuugazaki came over to Rin before he could so much as remove his shirt, both already clad in swimsuits._

_“Matsuoka-senpai,” spoke Ryuugazaki, fixing his glasses with a finger. “I believe you had agreed yesterday to give us a final answer today.”_

How can an eleven-year-old sound so pretentious, _fumed Rin._

_“Nanase still hasn’t said yes,” he spat, shooting a glare over their shoulders to the boy dressing beyond. “If he doesn’t, none of us get to swim.”_

_Hazuki spun around at once._

_“Nanase-kun? Don’t you want to swim with us?” he whined, his voice paper-thin as he hurried over to curl his arms around Nanase’s, latching onto him like a little kid nagging a reluctant parent. “Please say yes! We want to swim with you!”_

_“Nanase-senpai,” joined in Ryuugazaki, “I have always admired your beautiful technique, and I am impressed by the amount of trophies you had won at swim meets. It would be an honor to swim with someone like you!” he finished with a reverent bow, his hands clasped in prayer._

_“Please?” pleaded Hazuki, his eyes beading with tears. “Pretty please?!”_

_Nanase looked horrified. Rin expected him to shove Hazuki away as soon as his shock wore off, but instead Nanase lowered his head as he looked away._

_“Fine,” he mumbled, his voice barely a whisper. Rin could not believe his ears._

_“Yaaaay!” cried Hazuki, letting go of Nanase at once to jump and clap his hands, then attach himself shamelessly to Ryuugazaki in joy. “We’re gonna be the best team ever!”_

_“I’m honored,” repeated Ryuugazaki with a shy smile, now wringing his hands in excitement as Hazuki bounced around him in an improvised dance._

_A few feet away, Rin gritted his teeth in a mixture of disbelief and tired anger. Where he had hoped to persuade with personal charm and skill, he ultimately succeeded with sheer peer pressure by a couple of fifth graders from the seventh circle of hell._

* * *

Backstroke isn’t so bad _, Rin thought to himself once he started training for the relay in earnest. Sure, all the leg strength he had built by running was of little use when doing the flutter kick, but at the turn, he would get to show off his kick, and his entry also required a strong kick to propel him far enough for a long dive. In a way, he and Haru were now equal. Haru was just about back to health and his original form, while Rin was practicing a stroke he had learnt to swim but cared little about before._

 _Backstroke wasn’t so bad. Sure, he wouldn’t get to race Sousuke. He wouldn’t get to do a stunning exchange with Haru either, or watch him tense up as he waited for Rin on top of the block… but it wasn’t too bad. Rin would get to go first. He was the leader of the group, that much was certain, so it was fitting he would be first. It was like Haru mirrored him now. Backstroke and front crawl, first and last, the beginning and the end…_ the alpha and the omega.

_That last thought gave him pause. It sounded so grand, so poetic as foreign words often did in conversation. He would have to remember to tell the others and use it often._

Matsuoka Rin, the Alpha. Nanase Haruka, the Omega _. Rin liked the sound of that._

* * *

**_March… 2009._ **

_Several weeks passed, blurry beyond recognition. It was now March, and though hardly a bud could be seen in the flowerbed, the bricks themselves still offered plenty to look at. Haru himself helped erect the brick wall, while Rin mixed the cement and water together. On a whim, Rin wrote_ For the Team _on his brick. Haru’s brick read_ Free _._

Typical.

 _“It looks awesome!” said Nagisa, whom Rin had since grown quite used to, even fond of in all his cheerfully obnoxious ways, despite being called Rin-chan against his best wishes._ Oh well, it could be worse _, he thought back then. He would not have wanted to be called something even more ridiculous, like Rinrin, which was Nagisa’s first choice until Rin half persuaded, half threatened him out of using it._

_“Beautiful work, Haruka-senpai, Rin-senpai,” agreed Rei, whom Rin had also grown attached to for all the unnecessary arguments they’ve had over theory, form, the concept of beauty, or the dietary benefits of meat versus vegetables. Rin smiled._

_“It’s no buried time capsule full of messages, but it’ll do,” he said peacefully. Haru’s face betrayed no emotion. Even though he felt they had grown a little closer, they must have, Rin still couldn’t read him at all. No matter what he said or did, Rin was still stuck at the cover of the mysterious book that was Nanase Haruka._

_“Well, we must be off if we plan to catch our next train,” said Rei, “but thank you for inviting us to show us your graduation project!”_

_“May it bloom forever!” cried Nagisa with his hands thrown into the air. Rin laughed quietly, politely even._

_“Thanks for coming, you guys. Go and catch your train,” he replied. The two nodded, and once they said goodbye to Haru, they ran off together like always._

_In a way, Rin envied them._

_“Well, I guess this works for a goodbye to Iwatobi,” he said out loud, lifting his arms to cup the back of his head. He caught Haru’s eyes. They widened._

_“You mean elementary?” he asked, his brow creased. Rin shook his head._

_“I mean this town,” he said quietly, his chest feeling lighter with each word that had been waiting to burst out of him. Back when he had spoken to Sousuke about going abroad, all he could declare was his intention, even if he spoke of it like it were fact, but he needed to dissemble no longer. A letter that arrived yesterday had since turned intention into tangible reality._

_Rin’s lips twitched upward at the thought. After all his struggles, he would get to go overseas and start anew, leaving everything behind. Deep down, he could tell he was being selfish, but at that moment, all he felt was an overwhelming peace of mind, like the world had finally aligned with his dream at its axis._

_“I won’t be attending middle school here,” he said at last, ever so lightly. Haru’s face hardened at once in what seemed to be anger, even betrayal. Rin supposed he had expected it, yet in the face of that cutting glare, he was rendered speechless for a while._

_“What are you talking about?” asked Haru after a long silence. Rin’s eyes drifted to the cherry tree._

_“I’m going to Australia,” he replied, his tone dreamlike and distant. “I sent in my application to study abroad and the results came in yesterday. I’m going to go to a swimming school.”_

_He could see Haru glare at him from the corner of his vision. He then turned his head sharply. Perhaps he didn’t understand how much this meant to Rin. Well, Rin wouldn’t let him wonder long._

_"I’m going to study swimming there to become an Olympic swimmer," he declared with all the self-confidence his young successes could afford, but Haru didn’t seem to share his joy._

_“What about the relay?” he asked in a reluctant tone, as if Rin would throw away all his hard work so easily. In the face of such incomprehension, such distrust, all Rin could do was shrug and sink his hands into his pockets, taking a few steps towards the gate._

_“I’ll swim in the relay. I’m leaving the day after the tournament. So… this will be the last time the four of us swim together,” he replied._

_“I only swim free,” said Haru behind him, that same old nonsense mantra Rin still hadn’t been able to decipher, not even with the help of Nagisa and Rei. Rin reached out his hand and caught a few leaves floating midair, closing his fingers upon them._

_“That’s why you have to swim in the relay. This is our last chance,” he said, turning back to look Haru in the eye. “Let’s swim together, Nanase – the alpha and the omega. If you swim with me…”_

_At the upward tilt of his voice, Haru turned to him at last, his eyes large and dark blue as the ocean. Rin locked him in a stare. Time stopped around them and they stood frozen, their small figures forever petrified in the memory of a melancholy mind._

“…I’ll show you a sight you’ve never seen before,” whispered Rin into the darkness of his dorm room, his back thrown against the wall and his chest so tight he could barely breathe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't mention any names, but since the man who rescued Haruka in _High Speed!_ was never named, I decided to reimagine the scene with Gouda Takeo and Sunakawa Makoto from _Ore Monogatari!!_ in mind, with Takeo rescuing Haruka and Suna helping Aki call the ambulance.


	52. EPISODE 10: Disparate Heart Rate! - Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _My brother’s going to swim in the relay at regionals!_

The words bled like black ink into the calm blue waters of Makoto’s mind, rippling darkly across the surface. Each seemed no more than a drop in the ocean, but every single drop flushed through his system like poison, stunning Makoto into painful silence.

He stole a worried glance at Haruka. The other appeared deep in thought, but his features betrayed no anxiety, no distress of the sort Makoto could reasonably expect after their ill-fated race at prefecturals. From the gleam of Haru’s eye, the slight flush of his cheeks, and that barely perceivable forward arch of his head, Makoto instead gleaned a certain amount of anticipation, even willingness to embrace those terrible words as fact. Haru, it seemed, had accepted Kou’s intelligence of Rin as the issuance of a challenge.

Regardless, Haru did not say a word in reply, not that his lack of an audible response surprised Makoto. Quite the reverse. Short as their acquaintance might have been, he had learned to take his friend’s taciturnity in stride, even to think of it as endearing, and very much in character with someone who felt as deeply as Haruka. Makoto would have sooner expected Nagisa to say something, _anything,_ but even Nagisa gaped like a fish out of water. If someone as talkative as him could remain speechless, Makoto would certainly be spared from acknowledging Kou’s words openly. To acknowledge them even implicitly pained him more than he could express, and to dwell on them would have invited thoughts that Makoto had been struggling to suppress for some time to no avail.

In the end, it was Rei who stepped forward to break the silence, abandoning Nagisa mid-massage so he could join Kou’s side instead.

“Rin-senpai, swimming in the Samezuka relay?” he echoed Kou’s words, as if to reassure himself that he had heard her right. “Is it certain, Kou-san, absolutely certain?”

“Yes… I got my news from an official source,” replied Kou diplomatically, at which point Nagisa finally overcame his initial shock to crack a cheeky grin at her.

“Is that what you call Sei-chan these days?” he chimed in from his seat by the starting block. Kou cringed. Rei made a choking sound, spinning around with a scandalized look on his face.

“ _S-Sei-chan?!_ ” he spluttered in disbelief, glaring Nagisa down as he slapped his hands sternly on his hips. “Did you just call Mikoshiba Seijuurou-san, a third-year student and captain of the Samezuka Swim Club _Sei-chan?!_ ”

“That’s _Captain Mikoshiba_ to both of you!!” snapped Kou from behind them, startling Rei into a frightened salute, and Nagisa into raising his hands in surrender.

“Jeez..!” grumbled Kou. “But yes, it’s true! I got a message last night, and another one today that said Onii-chan was going to swim backstroke for his team, so we have a lot of work to do if we want to stand a chance against Samezuka, starting with Makoto-senpai,” she continued, jabbing a finger towards Makoto, who gave a strangled noise, eyes instinctively flitting to Haru for support.

Unfortunately for him, his friend showed no signs of wishing to join the conversation. Haru merely stared at Kou for a moment longer, then turned around and dove into the pool, as if to escape any more talk of work and effort. _I should have expected this much…_ thought Makoto, his brow flattening in defeat.

“Makoto-senpai!” repeated Kou, this time a little more sharply. Makoto let out a small yelp as he turned back to her. Kou’s finger had since sunk to her side, but now she raised it again to give her words more weight. “You will have to work extra hard on your technique to be able to stand up to Onii-chan!”

Makoto gave her a look of clear apprehension, but Nagisa peered up at him in curiosity, while Rei fixed his glasses with a smirk.

“Kou-san is right, Makoto-san,” he said as he approached their weary swimmer, “Rin-senpai is in excellent physical condition and I believe will be a formidable opponent in the medley relay, which is why I advise you to spend as much time training as you possibly can.”

“I will revise your training regimen by tomorrow morning!” promised Kou.

“Then I shall assist you with your diving technique and your dolphin kick,” offered Rei, unable to turn down a challenge, whether it was issued to him or someone else. Makoto lifted a finger and opened his mouth to speak, but it was not to be.

“Oh, oh!” cried Nagisa, even raising his hand to grab their attention, though he still didn’t bother to stand up from his seat by the starting block, or show any remorse over cutting off Makoto before he could say his piece. “Maybe Mako-chan should run, too! Rin-chan said running makes your kick stronger, so that could help too, right?”

“Excellent idea, Nagisa-kun!” gasped Rei in awe, his hand cupping his chin in thought. “Why haven’t I thought of this before…! Makoto-san is a trained runner and running also helps build stamina, which is exactly what a powerful, dynamic stroke needs to be efficient! What do you say, Makoto-san?” he asked at last, the three of them turning to Makoto in unison to lock him in a stare. Makoto swallowed. Nagisa wasn’t even blinking.

“I… I sup-pose I could start running again…” he risked with a hapless smile, one that only discomfort could produce, but everyone seemed entirely satisfied with his answer.

“Excellent!” replied Rei with a content smirk. “Then that’s settled! Makoto-san, please consider starting today to build as much leg strength and stamina as possible. Maybe I should run as well, since the butterfly kick requires considerable leg strength…”

“Shall I make you a running regimen? Onii-chan had one lying around from when he first started out…” offered Kou to both of them. Rei nodded eagerly, but Makoto winced at the thought and shook his head.

“That won’t be necessary, at least for me,” he said with as much politeness as his aversion allowed. “I’m used to running, so I’ll be fine.”

“That’s the spirit, Mako-chan!” said Nagisa with a gleeful look, even going so far as to rise from his seat and throw an arm around Makoto’s back, his shoulder a little too high for Nagisa to reach comfortably. “You’ll run and we’ll coach you and then you will be ready for the ultimate death match against Rin-chan!”

“Death match?!” cried Makoto, but Nagisa paid him no mind. In turn, Rei paid no mind to Nagisa for a change as he fixed his glasses and said,

“Well, I do believe it’s time to start training, so let’s begin with our usual warm-up exercises.”

He then turned his head to check if Haru had returned from the pool yet, but a mere glance confirmed that Haruka had no intentions of leaving the water for anyone’s sake. Rei shot a frosty glare at the pool.

“Haruka-senpai shall not be joining us,” he added with an acrid frown. Kou cleared her throat.

“I’ll leave you to your training, then,” she said. “I need to revise your training regimens anyway, and I still have a lot of work to do before our booth is finished.”

“Our booth?” echoed the boys. Kou nodded fervently.

“Our booth at the Iwatobi Cultural Festival!” she said, her eyes gleaming in excitement. “I know we didn’t discuss this, but I figured you would be too busy with training anyway, so I went ahead and asked to set up a single booth, to promote the swim club during the Cultural Festival next week!”

“But that starts tomorrow!” cried Rei in shock, feeling horribly out of the loop.

“Yup!” replied Kou. “I just need to put on some finishing touches and our booth will be ready to go, and right on the first floor too, just between the Calligraphy Club and the Film Club!” said Kou, looking mighty pleased with herself for having made an exceptionally promising arrangement, right next to one of the most popular clubs, yet still within easy distance of Chigusa. “I thought it would be good for the swim club to have some presence at the festival, so I’ll be there every morning until lunch time! Oh, speaking of mornings, starting Monday, swimming practice will begin at nine in the morning.”

“Eh?! Why so early?” whined Nagisa, who had been looking forward to sleeping in on weekdays for quite some time, especially when every single development promised all work and no birthday celebrations until regionals ended for good. Kou huffed.

“ _Because,_ ” she began, each word uttered with great emphasis, “I finally managed to secure a _coach_ for you!”

“ _Eh?!_ ” cried Nagisa a second time, this time joined by Makoto and Rei, who looked equally amazed at the idea that they would finally be getting professional help, being so close to the regional tournament, and their school so little to be depended on. Kou put her hands on her hips, straightening her shoulders with pride.

“That’s right! While you contended yourselves with your current training regimens, Ama-chan and I worked very hard to get Coach Sasabe to help you practice for the relay!”

“You got Goro-chan!? That’s awesome!” cried Nagisa, now grinning from ear to ear.

“Yup!” nodded Kou with a sweet smile. “He’s only available in the mornings because his deliveries start in the afternoon, so you had better be here on time! Nine in the morning is a very generous starting time, you know!”

“Not to those who commute…” mumbled Nagisa under his breath, but Kou feigned deafness.

“So do I understand correctly that our afternoon practice has simply been moved to the morning?” asked Rei. Kou shook her head.

“I’m afraid not, Rei-kun,” she replied, her tone and expression grave. “It simply means you have one practice in the morning and one in the afternoon, one with a proper coach and one without!”

Makoto wilted and Nagisa let out a high-pitched whine, but Kou proved inexorable.

“We don’t have any classes now and none of you are involved in the Cultural Festival, so you might as well practice as much as you can!” she replied dismissively.

“Then will you join us for our afternoon training, Kou-san?” asked Rei.

“Yes, and no,” replied Kou, her eyes averted as one foot shifted on the concrete. “I’ll be here as much as I can, but there might be afternoons when no one else will be here to supervise you except Ama-chan-sensei… because of the Cultural Festival…”

“Oh? I suppose you would want to attend the festival as much as possible…” risked Makoto, a little upset he and the others were so evidently denied the pleasure, but unable to argue with something that made perfect sense with the tournament looming over their heads. Kou colored at his words.

“Um, yes, you could say that,” she replied with a guarded expression. After all, she didn’t have to tell them she meant the Samezuka Cultural Festival and its traditional maid café…

* * *

Practice soon began and lasted a good two hours, during which Makoto received a lot more constructive attention than before, while Haru was content to receive none at all, having done his best to keep as busy as possible to avoid conversation. Had they forced themselves upon him and demanded a statement, Haru would have been quite unable to articulate his feelings with any degree of clarity. From the moment Kou had told them about Rin, a Gordian knot formed in Haruka’s chest that no past experience could untangle, no sword of will or reason could sever from his heart. All he could discern with any certainty was a sense of anticipation, subtle but deep-seated, for it had been ever present in all situations that involved Matsuoka Rin. One part of it was undoubtedly the thrill of competition, Haru would not deny it, but the other he felt rather ashamed of, for there was no other word for it than _familiarity_. Despite years of separation, one aspect of their broken relationship remained constant. With the promise of his presence, Rin could still excite him, and instill the same feelings from those few short months they had spent together at the Iwatobi Swimming Club. In a world where he now rapidly approached the end of high school, with an unknown future winding beyond it, Haru could imagine nothing greater than the comfort and safety of constancy. _His grandmother’s house, the water, mackerel… Rin… and—_

“Mako-chan!” Nagisa cried in the distance. “Come back so we can time you!”

“Coming,” replied Makoto from the other side of the pool, just a few lanes away from Haruka. Makoto shot him a tentative smile as he eased himself on his back for another leg of backstroke, but Haru colored and turned his head sharply, and for the rest of practice, he did his best to focus on his stroke with debatable success.

* * *

Once everyone finished changing in the club room, Rei crammed his belongings into his bag, then stepped over to Makoto, intending to impress upon him one more time the importance of running to build stamina.

“Makoto-san,” he began his benign assault, his eyes searching Makoto’s. “If you are not too tired from practice, may I suggest you run home as a way of easing yourself into exercise?”

“Oh? I— I suppose that’s reasonable,” replied Makoto, his own eyes flitting to Haruka as soon as Rei left him room to speak. Haru turned his head, but Rei rewarded Makoto with a smile.

“Excellent! Now, if I remember correctly, you rejected Kou-san’s offer of a running regimen earlier, so do you mean to devise your own?”

“Yes, yes, I’ll do that when I get home,” said Makoto not to invite any arguments. Rei nodded, then fixed his glasses with a smile.

“Excellent! Then this is settled!” he replied, clearly satisfied with Makoto’s willingness to double his efforts for the team. “I think I shall run to the station, myself.”

“I’ll join you!” Nagisa raised his hand with glee. As for Haru, he merely listened to them talk as he packed his things, each item gathered at a suspiciously leisurely pace.

“Well, I shall see you all at nine o’clock sharp,” Rei said to Makoto and Haruka, bowing his head in goodbye.

“We’re gonna train with Goro-chan! Ah, I’m so excited!” chirped Nagisa, waving to Makoto and Haru as he followed Rei to the door. “See you later, Haru-chan, Mako-chan!”

“Bye,” waved Makoto, waiting for them to leave before turning around to finish packing. Haru was still lingering by his cubby holes, but all his duffel bag lacked now was his towel, which found its way in just moments before Makoto put his last items away. They zipped their bags shut in perfect synch. Makoto turned to Haru with a small, awkward smile.

“Well… I suppose I’ll run home now, Haru,” he said quietly. Haru pursed his lips. Makoto lowered his eyes.

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” he added in an apologetic tone, tugging the strap of his duffel bag onto his shoulder. He turned to the door. Haru tensed.

“Makoto..” he spoke for the first time since they had arrived at the pool for practice. Makoto turned back to him at once, his features alert. Haru’s fist clenched by his side.

“I’ll run, too,” he said, his voice just as quiet, but his expression determined.

As Makoto made no objection, Haru proceeded to grab his duffel bag to join his friend. Makoto watched him in silence, his brow creased in thought. Did Haru decide to run with him so they could go home together like always, or was he inspired to train harder by the idea of racing Rin again? From the other’s guarded expression, Makoto could not tell. The answer could have just as well been one or the other, even both, but Makoto had no time to wonder about it. Haru soon stepped to his side, looking at him in anticipation, and the idea that he wouldn’t have to run alone finally pulled Makoto’s lips into a smile.

“Alright, Haru,” he said with a chuckle, holding the door open for his friend before locking it for the day. “Let’s try for a light jog all the way home, okay?”

“Okay,” replied Haruka.

And so the two of them broke into a light jog, which took them from the pool area to the school gate, then from the school down to the bay. On the way, Makoto did his best to control his pace and adjust it to Haruka’s, who soon grew so out of breath he was obliged to stop and rest for a few minutes. He doubled over, hands pressed to his knees as he drew long, hissing breaths through gritted teeth. Makoto reached out a put a gentle hand on his back. Haru’s heart skipped a beat.

“Try to open your mouth and breathe deeply,” said Makoto. “It might help to count in your head and time your breathing.”

Haru nodded wordlessly. He opened his mouth, his lungs flushed with air.

A minute later, they resumed running, Haru’s arm brushing against Makoto’s whenever his pace faltered for some mysterious reason.

* * *

With a few more breaks, they eventually reached Makoto’s gate, from whence Makoto walked Haru to his house, slowing down on purpose to help him wind down after exerting himself so unexpectedly. At the front door, Haru pushed the key into the lock, but he didn’t turn it just yet. His hand clenched around the keychain as Haru set his jaw.

“Makoto,” he began, turning his head to look at the other. “Are you going to run every day, then?”

“Yeah,” replied Makoto with a soft, defeated smile. “If everyone thinks I ought to, I might as well do it. I thought I would run to practice and back, and maybe run in the evenings, too. There aren’t many people around in the evening, and the weather’s a little cooler too, so maybe I’ll be able to go on longer runs then.”

“…When?” asked Haru, his eyes narrowed slightly. Makoto blinked.

“Eh? You mean, when in the evening? I suppose sometime after dinner. Something like eight o’clock, so I wouldn’t be staying out too late…”

“Okay,” replied Haru stiffly. “Eight o’clock. Don’t be late.”

He then turned the key and stepped inside, closing the door swiftly behind him. Outside, Makoto stared at the door for a moment longer, then burst into soft, amused laughter.

 _And here I thought running would be ‘too much effort,’_ he thought with a hapless smile and a small shake of his head as he walked back to his house, unaware that Haruka’s eyes followed him from the corner of his upstairs window for as long as Makoto was still in sight.

The moment his friend disappeared, Haru walked over to his wardrobe to check if he had any training clothes beside his Iwatobi tracksuits. A short but thorough search confirmed he had nothing even remotely suitable for the purpose beyond his collection of black and purple jammers. The standard Iwatobi High School tracksuit would just have to do.

* * *

As if Makoto had read his mind, he stepped outside at eight o’clock sharp in the same green second-year tracksuit as Haruka, who awaited him under the single torii. Haru seemed engrossed in the view above. Makoto’s face softened into a smile.

“I’m here, Haru,” he called out, just loud enough for him to hear. Haru let out a hum, then walked down the steps to join him.

“Where are we running?” he said, his posture a little stiff. Makoto gave him a sheepish look.

“I haven’t really thought about it,” he owned with a small scratch of his cheek. “I figured we would just go where our feet take us.”

Haru bit his lip. His cheeks were growing uncomfortably hot, even in the cool summer breeze.

“Can we run along the beach?” he asked next, squinting at Makoto. Makoto stared at him surprised, but after a moment’s consideration, he seemed pleased with the suggestion.

“Sounds good,” he said good-naturedly. “Does running to the other side and back sound okay?”

“Sure.”

As a warm-up, they decided to walk first, only breaking into a jog once they arrived at the foot of the hill and their path flattened considerably. The moment the bay came into sight, Makoto increased his pace. Haru took to Makoto’s left to race alongside him, each pulling ahead of the other repeatedly until they finally fell into rhythm, each pair of feet hitting the ground as one. Not a soul was around, but all the while they ran, Makoto struggled to gather his courage.

They almost reached the end of the bay when he finally braced himself, turning his head just slightly to look at Haruka. His friend stared ahead expressionless.

“Hey, Haru..” risked Makoto, his tone tentative.

“What?” breathed Haruka, his eyes still on the sky stretching beyond the bay.

“What are you going to do?”

“About.. what..?” came the confused reply. Makoto lowered his eyes to the ground.

“About Rin…”

Haru’s head twitched to him startled. Had Kou’s news about Rin been bothering Makoto all day? Had Makoto been waiting all this time to speak to him about it? Haru bit his lip. It wasn’t the first time Makoto seemed worried about Rin…

“Nothing,” he said at last to be truthful, his breathing ragged between words. “I don’t care.. as long as.. I can swim…”

Makoto stared at him for a moment, then broke into laughter that drew crow’s feet around the corners of his eyes, his shoulders relaxing in what seemed to be genuine relief. Haru sighed, his own shoulders loosening with each small sound of Makoto’s amusement, until he could no longer feel the wires of his back or the knot still lodged in his chest. Makoto turned to him with a grin. Haru quirked his brow.

“That sounds just like you, Haru,” said Makoto, his tone warmer than before. Haru squinted at him.

“Does.. it..” he panted, jutting his head upward as though that could coax more air into his lungs. Makoto shot him a tender look.

“Shall we take a short break?” he asked kindly. Haru colored.

“Yeah…”

* * *

The two of them spoke no more of Rin that night. To spare Haru from wasting his breath unnecessarily, Makoto fell silent as soon as they started running again, contending himself with small looks and smiles to encourage his friend on the final stretch. Even Haru found he was glad for it. As much as he had been avoiding the subject all day, he found to his surprise when it closed between them that a handful of words sufficed. In fact, no one else would have been satisfied with so little expect for Makoto, who could sometimes read Haru with a single glance and act accordingly, sparing Haru a great deal of trouble. _Convenient, that’s what he is,_ he thought with a pensive look on his face. _Makoto is convenient._

They eventually reached the path leading uphill, so they took another break, at which point Haru stole a look at Makoto, who finally showed signs of having run short on breath himself. Slowly, Haru wrapped his arms around his chest, hands clenching onto his thin arms on either side.

“Are you cold, Haru?” asked Makoto at once. Haru closed his eyes.

“Yeah…” he replied.

After a moment of awkward silence, during which Makoto fidgeted and Haru lowered his eyes, Makoto finally flashed him a brave smile, then unzipped his jacket, revealing his sleeveless track shirt underneath. He stepped over to hang the jacket from Haru’s shoulders with tender care, tucking it close to his back.

“Is that better?” he asked, his arms covered in goose bumps. Haru’s hands snuck out from beneath the extra jacket to tug the hems close together.

He hummed a yes, taking a deep breath that brought a faint smell of the ocean.

* * *

The next day, Haru met Makoto by the gate again, both dressed in their Iwatobi Swim Club tracksuits so they could run to school at a light, steady pace. When they arrived, an old friend and acquaintance awaited them by the pool: Sasabe Goro dressed in a black bodyskin, engaged in conversation with Nagisa and Rei by the blocks.

“Mako-chan, Haru-chan!” waved Nagisa, beckoning for them to come.

“Ah, hi there, Haruka, Makoto,” Coach Sasabe greeted the new arrivals.

“Good morning,” said Makoto with a tilt of his head.

“Morning,” mumbled Haru, his eyes slipping to the water.

“The two of you get changed,” said Sasabe as he straightened himself with an audible crack of his knuckles. “Kou has already given me your training regimens, so we are set to go!”

“Ah, alright, we’ll be right out,” replied Makoto, he and Haru withdrawing to the club room to change. Outside, Nagisa bounced on his heels.

“I can’t wait! This is going to be fun!” he said with a grin.

“We’ll see about that,” replied Sasabe with an ominous look. After so many years of involuntary hiatus, he felt sufficiently restored to his old self again, and now that he was here, he wanted nothing less than to work those boys until they dropped.

* * *

Once Haru and Makoto changed, Rei requested permission to conduct the group’s warm-up exercises and Sasabe agreed, taking it as an opportunity to scrutinize Rei’s routine. Even Haru joined in for once, standing behind Makoto to copy the others as best he could, though whether he did so out of consideration for Rei or due to the watchful glare of their coach remained to be seen.

At the end of their warm-ups, Sasabe deemed Rei’s exercises satisfactory, so he told the boys to line up for a medley relay test run. At first, he merely wanted to observe their exchanges, but once the test run began, Sasabe finally grasped just how badly the Iwatobi Swim Club was in need of proper instruction, from Makoto to Haruka and everyone in-between.

“Hey! Put some more effort into it!” he yelled at Makoto as he was closing in for an exchange with Nagisa. His hands touched the wall. As Nagisa sprung forward, Sasabe tore into his hair.

“Nagisa, you’re bending your knees too much! You don’t need such a powerful jump for a relay dive!” he cried after Nagisa, stepping forward to check on Makoto, who was still panting below the block.

“Makoto, your form is terrible! You’re not using your shoulders!” came the verdict. Makoto lowered his eyes sheepishly as he left the lane, not knowing how to respond when both of his shoulders were still burning from the effort to show off his technique. Only one thing seemed certain, that Sasabe was not kidding when he had told Makoto months ago his nickname used to be ‘Demon.’ Listening to him yell nonstop, Makoto felt the title had been well earned.

Leaving the pool, he walked to the other side to watch Nagisa and Rei’s exchange, which did not go by without plenty of comments from Sasabe. Their coach then fixed his eyes intently on Haruka. Rei was still some ten meters away, but as he closed in, it became apparent that his stroke had grown uneven.

“Rei, if you can’t coast into the wall, throw in one more kick! _But not like that!_ ” yelled Sasabe as Rei glided through the last meter to slam his hands on the wall. On top of the block, Haru tensed, then performed a perfect dive – at least two seconds late.

“Haruka, watch your timing as you fall in! _NO!_ You have to watch Rei more closely!” screeched Sasabe, throwing his arms in the air.

“ _Come on!_ ” he griped as he glared the three boys down, Haruka well beyond his range and too focused on his stroke to hear him. “You guys don’t know what you’re doing at all!”

“Well, you should have come to coach us earlier, Goro-chan!” whined Nagisa from the neighboring starting block as Rei climbed out of the pool to leave the lane open for Haruka.

“ _No excuses!_ ” snapped Sasabe, his eyes flashing. “How did you even win the relay with your current forms?!”

“You would know if you had come to watch us swim!” retorted Nagisa.

“ _NOBODY EVEN TOLD ME YOU WERE SWIMMING THE RELAY!_ ” howled Sasabe. Nagisa yelped, but he recovered quickly enough and put a finger to his cheek.

“I guess so… but if you had seen us, you would have thought we were perfect!”

“You know what I think now?” replied Sasabe. Nagisa perked up. “That you are _still_ the biggest braggart in your class.”

“ _Goro-chaaan..!_ ” wailed Nagisa, but before either he or Sasabe could continue, Haru finally returned, slipping to the wall in a leisurely glide. He touched it lightly for his finish.

“How was that?” he asked calmly when he lifted his head. Sasabe’s face contorted into a disappointed frown.

“Were you even trying to swim as fast as possible?” he muttered darkly. Haru shrugged his shoulders.

“It’s just a test run,” he replied, face blank. Rei stared at him scandalized. Sasabe gave him a glare.

“That’s it,” he said, raising his eyes to the heavens with a look of defeat. “And here I thought you were actually serious about training for the relay!”

“But we _are!_ ” cried Nagisa, who now sprung up from the starting block to attach himself to Sasabe’s arm. “We need to be in top shape so we can race Rin-chan!”

A few feet away, Makoto winced at the name. Nobody noticed.

“Kou did tell me he was going to swim for Samezuka Academy,” replied Sasabe as he gave his beard a slight rub with his thumb, “so I thought you would all be fired up to train.”

Makoto turned his head, his jaw clenching in agony. Unable to openly reject the assertion that he shared his team’s enthusiasm for the Samezuka rival, all he allowed himself was a glance at Haruka, who stood by the wall for a moment longer, then pushed himself away, letting the water carry him out of the conversation.

“But I told you that _we are!_ ” whined Nagisa as he tugged on Sasabe’s arm. “We need to be ready for Rin-chan or we might not get to race him again!” he cried, his voice growing loud and shrill in his fervent attempt to convince their coach. A few meters away, Haru twitched, then planted his feet to stand up in the pool, his eyes fixed on Nagisa and Sasabe again.

Makoto’s heart gave a leap. He hadn’t seen Haru look so determined since that day at prefecturals, a few hours before… before _that._

“How do you like the sound of that?!” Sasabe called out to Haru, now that he finally commanded the other’s attention. “If you don’t take this seriously, you might as well not go to regionals and face Rin at all!”

Haru arched his head forward. A moment later, he kicked himself away from the bottom, swimming over to the wall again. Makoto reached out his hand instinctively. Haruka took it blindly on his way out of the pool.

“That’s the spirit,” said Sasabe with a jovial grin. “Looks like I’ll just have to keep motivating you with the promise of a reunion! Maybe even a get-together!”

“A get-together with Rin-senpai?” asked Rei, who had been listening with great interest, but now looked to Sasabe in nothing short of awe at the thought that they might get to reconcile with Rin-senpai in a private circle of old friends. In contrast, Makoto cringed and tensed his shoulders, but let them slump in relief when Sasabe shook his head.

“Not with Rin,” he replied, straightening himself with a smirk. “I thought I would treat you myself if you worked hard this week! Kou told me the closing ceremony for the trimester was this Friday, so I thought I would invite the whole Iwatobi Swim Club over to my place on Thursday, to unwind after all your training and send out the trimester with a bang.”

He then shrugged his shoulders, turning his head with a pained expression.

“But if you’re not interested…”

“Did you hear that, everyone?” cried Rei, absolutely delighted. He lifted a hand to his chest as he looked to the others, to be met with smiles, and what he thought was probably performance anxiety on Makoto’s part. “Let’s work hard so that we may earn the privilege of becoming Sasabe-sensei’s guests for a day, and then face Rin-senpai in the relay and advance to the national tournament!”

“Now that’s what I like to hear,” laughed Sasabe. “Let’s get back to training!”

“Okay!” replied Rei and Nagisa. Haruka nodded, while Makoto stared wordlessly at the ground, his stomach still squirming at their talk of Rin, Rin, _Rin._

* * *

For the rest of the morning, Sasabe worked each of them mercilessly as per their revised training regimens, bellowing orders and spouting criticism with no one spared from his sharp and watchful eye.

Makoto in particular was often the prime subject of Sasabe’s discontent. With each comment leveled at his rudimentary form and rough stroke, Makoto was forced to realize his two scant months of training recommended him very poorly to a professional with many tournaments under his belt. Within an hour, his technique went from rough but dynamic to frantic and errant, and by the end of the second hour, he twitched to a halt in the middle of his lap, painfully conscious of how everyone had stopped to stare, even Haru.

“Are you alright, Mako-chan?” asked Nagisa, wading over to Makoto in his own lane.

“It’s, it’s just a cramp,” replied Makoto as he forced a smile. “I’m fine.”

Haru’s brow creased. A lane away, Rei turned to Sasabe, raising his hand for permission to speak. Sasabe nodded. Rei cleared his throat.

“May Makoto-san take a short rest to recover?” he called out to the coach. Makoto’s cheeks seared in shame, his fists clenching helplessly below the surface. In the distance, Sasabe checked his watch.

“We’ll stop for now,” he hollered back, his hand pressed to his mouth to help carry his voice across the water. “It’s two minutes to eleven! Everyone out of the pool!”

Makoto turned towards the nearest wall, then waded down his lane in slow, wavering steps. Haru watched him, his brow furrowed. Makoto reached the wall and climbed out without looking back. Haruka sighed.

A moment later, he burst forward to make a dash for the furthest wall, unable to help but think that something was going wrong again.

* * *

At the end of each training, they put the equipment back, gathering any used kickboards, buoys, and their one functional stopwatch to put them back inside the locker room. Today was no different, except in one respect: this time, Sasabe Goro joined them, all too happy to follow the boys to the locker room, where he had once been in charge of the equipment as a former student of Iwatobi High School.

“This place brings back memories,” he sighed contentedly as he walked over to the metal lockers. “The locker room hasn’t changed one bit.”

He picked a locker seemingly at random and pulled it open, letting out a loud gasp.

“Ooh! My message is still here!” he exclaimed in surprise, grinning as he pointed to the graffiti on the inner side of the locker door, scribbled in English with a black marker. “Forevar Iwatobi!”

“Goro-chan, you spelled it wrong,” pointed out Nagisa the moment he poked his head in front of Sasabe to take a look.

“I’m not that picky!” huffed Sasabe, slamming the locker shut.

“It doesn’t affect his ability to coach,” said Haru with a shrug of his shoulders.

“That’s true. Goro-chan’s gonna straighten out our exchanges in no time!” said Nagisa with an apologetic grin. Sasabe huffed again, but his face now betrayed amusement.

“Exactly!” said Rei, joining his friend’s side with a smile. “Let us all keep up the hard work, so we may be worthy opponents to Rin-senpai and his team at regionals!”

“That’s what I want to hear every day!” said Coach Sasabe with a grin. “Now that you’re all fired up, _I will crack down on you_ _for real!_ ”

“Eh?!” cried Nagisa in horror. Sasabe cracked his knuckles again.

“I’m going to work you so hard you’ll beg for mercy!” he bellowed with a laugh, soon joined by Nagisa.

Beside them, Rei seemed ecstatic and Haruka calm, even pleased, but Makoto could no longer bear to feign interest or his smile, not even for Haru’s sake. Hoping nobody paid any attention to him, he turned around to step outside, unaware he had inadvertently drawn Haru’s eyes on his way out.

Makoto was just about to open the door to the club room when he heard footsteps. He tensed. Haru stopped a few feet away.

“Are you alright?” he asked, his voice quiet. Makoto’s head twitched, as though he intended to turn to Haruka, but changed his mind halfway.

“I’m fine,” he replied, his voice soft and dull. “Don’t worry, Haru.”

A pause. Makoto pulled the door open, his eyes carefully kept to the ground.

“Are you going to run home?” asked Haru, stepping closer. Makoto sighed.

“Yeah.”

“I’ll run, too.”

“Okay, Haru,” replied Makoto, unable to say no to him.

Ten minutes later, he left the club room at a jog with Haru by his side, struggling to control his pace when every wretched moment of the morning’s practice spurred him to just run, run, _run._


	53. EPISODE 10: Disparate Heart Rate! - Part 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Unfortunately for Makoto, Haruka’s presence dictated a moderate pace and several short breaks along their usual route, forcing Makoto to idle for a few minutes at a time as he waited for Haru to recover. While his friend struggled to control his breathing as he had been taught on previous runs, Makoto shifted from one foot to the other, itching to move, to sprint, to _escape_.

By the time they had stopped by his gate, then walked up to Haruka’s house at a slower pace, Makoto would have given anything to stay home for the rest of the day. To hide himself in his room, quiet and confined, would have been infinitely preferable to another few hours of practice in the afternoon, where he was sure he would be told again and again how everything they made him do was for Matsuoka Rin.

At the front door, Haru placed his key in the lock, but chose to linger just as he did before. Makoto bit his lip.

“Haru..” he began, his tone cautious, “I was thinking that.. maybe you shouldn’t exert yourself so much. Running five times a day might be too much for a beginner…”

“I’m not a beginner,” replied Haru, his shoulders tense. “I ran at training camp, too.”

“We all did, Haru,” said Makoto, “but what about before the camp? I don’t believe I’ve seen you run for exercise at any other time.”

“I used to run for exercise when I was young,” said Haruka, but he now turned his head in discomfort. Makoto quirked his brow.

“Oh? Did you exercise for an extended time?”

“…Three days,” muttered Haruka, his cheeks too warm, and though Makoto was in no mood for jests, he found himself suppressing laughter.

“Three whole days, huh. What made you stop?” he asked, his tone teasing, but not unkind. Haru’s eyes darkened.

“Pneumonia,” he said quietly. Makoto’s brow furrowed.

“Haru…” he sighed, lowering his head in shame at having taken the other’s words so lightly. He hesitated. Haru turned towards the door with a sharp tug of his shoulder.

“I’ll see you at one forty,” he mumbled without looking back, the key finally clicking in the lock, but just as Haru lifted a foot to step inside, Makoto clasped a hand around his wrist.

“Haru..!”

His voice choked as if he had regretted his nerve, though his hand stayed to squeeze Haru’s wrist in desperation. Haruka turned back to him wide-eyed. Makoto looked away, his face unbearably hot.

“…Please don’t do anything that could hurt you,” he said in a strained tone. “Please.”

Haru stared at him. Little by little, his features softened.

“I’ll be fine,” he said gently. “I’m stronger than before.”

He nudged his wrist in Makoto’s grasp, then watched as Makoto’s fingers loosened to release him, curling up as he drew them back to his side.

“What about you?” asked Haruka. Makoto’s shoulders arched defensively.

“Me..?”

“Are you okay? You had an episode at practice, didn’t you.”

Makoto clenched his jaw, his eyes boring holes into the ground.

“It was nothing. I was just stressed about…”

He paused as he reached deep inside himself for the truth, to scoop it up and offer it to Haru in all its aching rawness, but the more he strained for the words, the deeper they sank into the well, until all Makoto could grasp was the sludge that swallowed them whole.

“…about swimming.”

“You’ll be fine,” replied Haruka matter-of-factly, face calm and eyes clear, and Makoto nodded despite himself in a futile attempt to believe him.

* * *

The moment Makoto was free to go, he hurried back down the stone stairs and up the steps to the gate, where he paused, crouched down, then plucked a handful of wild flowers. In the yard, he slipped them into the glass bottle to replace the wilted daisies, then walked to the front door, where turned his keys, slid it open, and hurried upstairs to his room. A moment later, his door closed with a thud. His mother, confused, left the kitchen for the hallway.

“Makoto?” she called out. No one answered, but within seconds, Ran and Ren came bounding into the hallway from the living room at the sound of Onii-chan’s name, followed shortly by their father.

“Is Onii-chan home?” Ren asked his mother. “I didn’t hear him say hello.”

“Neither did I,” said their father, his brow creased. “And here I thought this running upstairs and hiding in his room stopped when he had gotten the hang of swimming with the team.”

“I guess this is something new,” risked his wife.

“If this keeps up, I’m going to talk to him about leaving that club,” he promised with a frown.

“We’ll check on Onii-chan,” offered Ran, and having created a handy excuse to leave the discussion, she scampered up the stairs with Ren in tow, who kept yelling _Wait for me!_ as he raced his sister to Makoto’s room.

Their parents now stood alone in the hallway, their mother rubbing soothingly at her husband’s arm. He sighed.

“I said it before and I’ll say it again,” he told her, his features hardening as he reached for her hand to cup it in his. “I’m not putting my son into an early grave over a swim club.”

* * *

Upstairs, the twins snuck into Makoto’s room on tiptoes and sure enough, they found him in bed, buried under the covers just like before. Ran and Ren exchanged glances, then crawled into their brother’s bed on either side, peeling his blanket back just enough to uncover Makoto to the top of his shoulders. They put him in a headlock at once, knowing Onii-chan would never resist, not even when he would rather be alone. Their brother sighed.

“What’s wrong, Onii-chan?” asked Ran, her face pale with worry. Makoto turned his head as much as their clinging little arms allowed, forcing a smile for their sake.

“Nothing,” he said, his tone mellow and worn. “Onii-chan is just tired from practice. Our manager got a coach to train us for the relay, and he’s very tough,” he explained, knowing full well his siblings were handy messengers, who would pass his words on to their parents down to the last syllable. “He will train us every morning until the relay, and then we also have practice in the afternoon.”

“Isn’t that too much, though?” spoke Ran again.

“Yeah!” chimed in Ren. “Onii-chan used to have one practice in the afternoon, but now you have two and you also run there and back, and run in the evenings…” he said as he counted on one hand, curling it back to Makoto’s neck the moment he was done. “That’s too much!”

“I know… but that’s what the club wants me to do, so I have to,” replied Makoto in calm resignation. The twins frowned at his words, but since they had no manager or vice-captain to argue with for Onii-chan’s sake, they settled for another course, showing kindness where they felt it lacking.

“Then you just rest, Onii-chan,” said Ran in a soothing tone, reaching out a hand to pat Makoto’s hair.

“Mom said lunch would be ready soon,” joined in Ren, his voice now hushed to mind his tired brother. Makoto acknowledged the implicit request with a nod.

“Then I’ll take a nap until lunch, okay?” he said with a soft smile, even closing his eyes to feign sleep, and not having the heart to pester him any longer, the twins carefully untangled their arms from around his neck, slipping out of bed to leave as silently as they came.

The moment the door closed, the smile was gone, and a few minutes later, so was Makoto.

* * *

Downstairs, the twins delivered Makoto’s explanation to their parents, and after some discussion, the Tachibanas collectively agreed in good faith to take Makoto’s words at face value, for now. Once lunch was ready, Makoto was visited in his room, where he was gently roused from his sleep to join them at the table. He was treated with understanding during the meal, which he ate without a single attempt to join their conversation. Finally, when he walked into the hallway just a minute away from one forty to meet Haruka, everyone gathered by the stairs to wish him good luck with his afternoon practice.

Makoto replied with a plain _thank you_ and a fragile smile, much too grateful to his family to be able to express it in words. He then stepped outside with a heavy heart, half wishing he had nowhere to be, and no Samezuka rival to impress.

Haru was waiting for him by the single torii in his tracksuit, the duffel bag resting on his shoulder, and had it not been for the fog that descended over Makoto’s mind, he might have noticed that while Haru showed great willingness to meet Rin at regionals, there was an equal willingness in the way he hurried down the stone steps to fall into rhythm by Makoto’s side, occasionally bumping against his shoulder as they jogged downhill towards the bay.

Not that Makoto would have dared believe it, nor did his cooperation hinge on his beliefs of any regard the others might have felt for him. While he ate lunch with his family, then lay on his bed upstairs staring at the clock, he shuffled his thoughts like cards, laying them on the table of his mind. His obligations to the team, his original purpose for joining the swim club, the importance of advancing at the regional tournament, Haruka’s happiness… and though Makoto could not bring himself to admit it, the last one proved to be the trump card every time. Where he fervently wanted to have faith in his sense of duty and loyalty to the team, Makoto found himself fantasizing of disobedience at every turn, of standing his ground for a change to tell his teammates just what he thought of their priorities, of Rin… but each time he envisioned the others in front of him, ready to take the brunt of his ire, his resolve invariably wavered as he imagined himself staring into those dark blue eyes, to tell Haruka that… _That…_

_That I would do my best, Haru._

And so Makoto severed his own tongue and wired his jaws shut, letting Haru coax him along to practice, to run home, then to a longer run in the evening – lather, rinse, repeat. Little changed in that wretched routine as Monday turned into Tuesday and Tuesday bled into Wednesday, beyond the fact that Makoto gradually grew so quiet he did not speak two words together during Wednesday afternoon’s practice. Whenever he was engaged to speak, he simply nodded, or occasionally forced himself to show a token of interest that he faked like everything else, everything except his concern that he was paving Haru’s path towards disaster. Rin’s name in particular kept cropping up over and over, which gave the illusion that everyone around Makoto was still lively and talkative. Had he paid more attention to them, he would have noticed Haruka was just as taciturn as ever, and even the first-years were losing steam after their initial enthusiasm over the relay. By the end of that afternoon’s practice, Rei noted with no small degree of embarrassment that he had grown feeble in the few weeks that had passed since their training camp, and was thoroughly glad Coach Sasabe made his Thursday invitation official at last.

“You earned it,” he told them at the end of their morning training, causing great joy in almost every quarter, with some rejoicing more boisterously than others. Even Makoto did his best to show more gratitude than he felt, but looked forward to the get-together with little more than cautious curiosity. Unless Sasabe intended his evening party to take their minds off the relay, Makoto would be hearing a great deal more of Rin than he had ever cared to, and that prospect alone wilted him beyond all comparison to his teammates.

Fortunately for Makoto, nobody expected him to join their conversations, or to show enthusiasm for their sake. Makoto wasn’t sure whether it was by Haru’s design or from their own natural tact that neither Rei nor Nagisa badgered him for displays of high morale, but it mattered little. In any case, no one bothered him beyond asking for assistance in practicing their relay exchanges, and Makoto was glad for it. So immersed in his own personal hell, even things like not being needlessly harassed seemed like small pleasures, until Makoto even forgot about the Iwatobi Cultural Festival… that is, until Nagisa finally reminded them on Thursday morning, just after their training with Coach Sasabe.

“Well, that’s it for now! I’ll see you at six!” were Sasabe’s words, who nodded his head to the boys with a grin as he hurried off to make his final preparations for the evening feast. The boys thanked him, then waved goodbye, lowering their hands only after Sasabe disappeared beyond the fence. Once he was gone, Rei turned to the others.

“Alright,” he straightened his shoulders and fixed his glasses, “let’s put everything away, and then everyone is dismissed until afternoon practice!”

“Oh, oh!” cried Nagisa at once, raising his hand and swaying it about.

“Yes, Nagisa-kun?” nodded Rei with obvious surprise. Nagisa grinned.

“Since we are free now, why don’t we go and see the Cultural Festival? It’s still morning so Kou-chan should be there, right?”

Rei gasped.

“That’s a wonderful idea, Nagisa-kun!” he said with a cheerful smile. “I must confess the Cultural Festival had slipped my mind entirely.”

“It ends today, so this is our last chance to see Kou-chan’s booth,” added Nagisa. “So let’s go and pay her a surprise visit after we clean up!”

“All in favor?” asked Rei, directing his attention to the captain. Haru shrugged. “Then it’s settled!”

“Cultural Festival, here we come!” cried Nagisa with glee.

Behind them, Makoto suppressed a sigh, turning away from the others to pick up the empty bottles from the pool side, wondering why he couldn’t even muster an inkling of excitement for the festival he had been longing to see some days before.

* * *

Even though Kou had given them directions, and there was always at least one person around to point them towards the Film Club’s current location, the swim team navigated the now alien landscape of the main building in constant bewilderment at how much change a few days’ festivities could bring to an otherwise orderly school environment. Posters and banners hung from every wall, pyramid signs stood in front of every room to indicate what clubs had taken residence there, and every few steps, members of these clubs tried to entice them with pamphlets, food, activities, and raffles. Haru shrugged his shoulders every five seconds. Makoto politely declined a thousand times. Nagisa and Rei proved susceptible to free offers, however, so they soon had their hands full of brochures, cookies, and raffle tickets, while all Haru and Makoto agreed to was a pair of colorful paper garlands, hung around their necks by a couple of girls from the Craft Club. Makoto in particular received his with much giggling on their side as he bent down to hang his head for them. In fact, he seemed to be followed by more attention in general than he had ever been met with during regular school days. Haru’s face darkened at an alarming rate in suspicion… and a few minutes later, he got his answer in the form of the Iwatobi Swim Club booth.

The booth was indeed wedged between the Film Club and the Calligraphy Club, as little more than a table and the wall behind it, but Kou had done wonders with what little space she could secure for the club, fashioning it with tasteful simplicity. She covered the table with a blue cloth, then hung a white and black banner to its front with the words _Iwatobi Swim Club_ to announce the club’s participation in the festival, while the table itself appeared to hold a bottle of water and a glass for Kou, a small stack of brochures she and Ama-chan put together based on the ancient training camp booklet, and another stack of papers as of yet unidentified, sitting next to a cardboard box.

Behind Kou loomed the large billboard she had borrowed from the club room, where her busy swimmers had completely overlooked its absence. It held, on one side, the four certificates they got at prefecturals, and on the other, some two dozen photographs. A couple of girls were scribbling onto pieces of paper by the table as Kou sat in her chair with her hands clasped together, but the moment the girls turned to pop their folded papers into the box, they finally noticed the swim club standing nearby. They turned to each other with excited whispers, then left amid much giggling, followed by Haruka’s glare and queasy looks from Makoto, who had had enough of everyone staring at him wherever he turned. Thankfully, Nagisa was more than willing to quiz Kou about it. Once the girls were gone, he rushed over to the booth to ask what was undoubtedly on everybody’s minds.

“Are those our pictures from the training camp?!” he cried in surprise when he stopped in front of Kou’s desk, noticing a moment later that some of the pictures had capital letters scribbled on them, each marked picture being a photograph of a single swim club member. Kou blinked at him, then flashed a sheepish smile, her cheeks tinted pink.

“Yes, they are,” she told them as Rei convulsed in silence beside Nagisa. “I wanted to put up something that motivated students to consider joining the swim club, so I thought I’d show them how fun the training camp had been to raise interest!”

“Awesome!” cheered Nagisa, but Rei gave a choked gurgle as he lifted a trembling finger.

“Why did you put up that picture of me?! _It’s not beautiful at all!_ ” he screeched, jabbing his finger accusingly at a photo of himself with Nagisa tying floaties onto his arms and back. Kou giggled nervously.

“I thought it would be informative..?” she squeaked as soon as she managed to stifle her laughter. Haru and Makoto had since walked over to join them, but while Makoto was eyeing the photographs with mixed feelings, in particular the one where Kou was feeling his bicep with one hand and giving the photographer a thumbs up with the other, Haru was staring at the contents of the table. After a short pause, he pointed to the forms by the box.

“What are these?” he asked, too lazy to read them. Kou flushed a little deeper.

“Ah, those? They’re just forms for a game we came up with Hana-chan,” she explained with an innocent smile. “When I finally put up the pictures, a lot of students started stopping by the booth and talked to each other about which swimmer they liked best, so Hana-chan said we should make a popularity poll! We asked students what they thought of you based on your pictures, and I made these forms so they could vote! The poll’s been going for three days now!”

“A popularity poll…” whispered Rei, his face glowing red as he fished up a form to stare at the categories in growing disapproval. Nagisa whistled in awe.

“Is that why you gave us a letter each?” he asked, pointing to the billboard where Haru was marked as swimmer ‘A,’ Rei as swimmer ‘B,’ Nagisa as swimmer ‘C,’ and Makoto as swimmer ‘D.’ Kou nodded. Nagisa’s eyes widened in excitement.

“Do you have any results yet?” he asked with an eager grin. The others stared at him, then looked to Kou in anticipation. Kou lifted a hand to her lips to mask her cough.

“Well, I could tell you the results of the first three days…” she mused in whispers, “…but there could be changes by the end of today, you know…”

“Come on, Kou-chaaan…!” pleaded Nagisa, his hands kneading the folds of the table cloth by the edge. Kou rolled her eyes.

“ _Fine, fine_ , give me a second,” she said as she fished out an note book from her bag. She flipped it open. “According to the ballots from the past three days, sixty-seven percent of the voters were girls and thirty-one percent were boys, with two percent choosing ‘other’. Voters could rate every swimmer on a scale of one to five. Categories included things like attractiveness, personality, muscles, and overall impression.”

“Muscles…” hissed Rei, his eyes narrowed. Kou refused to comment.

“After assessing the results, there seem to be four distinct student populations, each preferring one swimmer overall, but these four populations also generally agree on voting one specific swimmer for certain categories…”

“ _Kou-chaaan..!_ ” whined Nagisa.

“Alright, _alright!_ ” cried Kou, lowering her voice a moment later. “Jeez…”

She paused to look left and right, then whispered the next bit with her hand cupped over her mouth.

“Makoto-senpai has the most votes so far.”

“ _What,_ ” blurted Haru with a hard squint. Makoto burst into color from his neck to his ears, a deep crimson, to be precise. Kou averted her eyes.

“Makoto-senpai was unanimously voted for best muscles by all genders, and he has the highest overall impression rating,” she explained with a hapless smile. Makoto placed a heavy hand on his face. Nagisa, not disappointed in the slightest, laughed as he slapped a hand on Makoto’s back.

“That’s the back muscles we all know and love!” he said with a grin, obviously teasing, but the next moment, Haru turned to Kou with flashing eyes.

“Stop the poll,” he said, his face deadpan. Kou squeaked. “I’m the captain so you have to,” added Haru, ignoring the way Nagisa struggled to smother his laughter.

“But— Haruka-senpai, now the swim club’s more popular!” cried Kou. “Look!” she pointed to a small cluster of students walking down the hall towards them, their pace slowing considerably as they neared the swimmers, then appeared to recognize them. They turned to each other with telling smiles, temporarily suspending their conversation, which broke out again in hushed tones once they passed the table. One girl looked back at Makoto. The moment she turned back, the others started giggling.

“See?! Now everyone is aware of who they have to thank for Iwatobi High School’s advancement to regionals!” said Kou. Makoto pressed two hands to his face. Rei scowled.

“Are you going to put up the results anywhere?” he asked warily. Kou shook her head.

“Of course not! This is just for fun. I will destroy the ballots once I counted them all. I won’t even show them to you guys since they are confidential!” she said, then paused with a flush. “Well… maybe there could be some exceptions. There was a comments section and some of the voters put their phone numbers there, with a note that they would love their favorite swimmer to call—”

“Destroy those, too,” said the captain, his brows arched into the fiercest V in the world.

* * *

The swim club soon dispersed for lunch and the early hours of the afternoon. Kou stayed behind the table to command her booth while Nagisa and Rei decided to walk around the Cultural Festival to put their raffle tickets to good use, and as for Haru and Makoto, they simply headed home for a well-deserved rest before their next practice. Once Sasabe’s invitation ceased to be a promise and turned into an obligation, the swim club collectively agreed to move their afternoon practice by one hour, which afforded them the luxury of going to Sasabe’s house directly from school. To spare themselves from having to go home in-between, Rei and Nagisa had even packed a set of clean casual clothes, while Haru and Makoto could afford to wait until the afternoon to pick their evening ensembles.

At the end of practice, everyone took a long shower, then retired to the club room to change. They then left together, Kou joining them by the gate, at which point Ama-chan offered to drive as many people to Sasabe’s house as her tiny car could fit.

“I already promised Kou-chan I would take her there and back, so there’s only room for three more,” she added apologetically. “Since there are four of you, that means one of you would have to walk…”

“That’s fine, Amakata-sensei,” said Rei with a polite wave of his hand. “I think all of us would rather walk than leave one person behind,” he added. He spoke after his own heart as someone who would have definitely resented being left out, but the others appeared to agree with the sentiment, so Ama-chan nodded with a smile.

“As you wish,” she said cheerfully. “Then Kou-chan and I will see you there!”

“Bye,” waved Nagisa as Kou got into Ama-chan’s tiny pink car and the two of them drove off, figuring a couple of helping hands at an earlier hour might be of some use to their host.

Back at the gate, the others hoisted their duffel bags onto their shoulders, then proceeded to walk to the venue, which was some twenty minutes away down the main road by the ocean cliff, built to tower above the shore with a long stretch of houses on the innermost side. By the time they started their journey, Makoto had fallen completely silent, but nobody noticed anymore. Rei and Nagisa were absolutely bursting to tell him and Haruka of the Cultural Festival, so their elders contented themselves with merely listening, and marvelling politely where applicable.

* * *

After a long row of boring houses, the team finally managed to spot Sasabe’s by the telltale pink car parked next to it. They gathered by the door in twos, Rei ushering Haruka forward so the captain and vice-captain would lead side by side, then ringing the doorbell with a look of smug satisfaction on his face. Haru could have foregone the privilege, but it was no use arguing with someone who considered it an indispensible formality. Besides, Rei was obviously happy to lead with him, with Nagisa skipping after them and Makoto bringing up the rear.

“Thanks for coming,” said Sasabe as he guided them into the front yard and towards the door. On the way, the five of them passing by a large bucket, holding an enormous watermelon with ice cold water pooling around it from the garden hose above. Sasabe opened the door to lead them inside, where a dense, aromatic fug of their prospective dinner wafted through the air, along with a mist of hot steam none of them had anticipated in the middle of high summer.

They hardly knew what to expect, but upon stepping inside the living room, Rei’s glasses fogged up in seconds, while Makoto started sweating at an unprecedented rate. In the middle on the dining table stood a large electric cooker, holding what appeared to be a hot pot filled to the brim with crabs, mushrooms, plump sausages, cabbage, cubes of tofu, and scallops, cradled in a rolling boil of red liquid that Haru could only guess was tomato-based. Ama-chan had already taken her seat by the table, languishing in a light summer dress that felt like a dozen layers in the heat. She merely raised a limp hand to greet the boys as they arrived to take their seats by the table, the lucky ones settling close to the open terrace doors and the electric fan, which altogether offered little relief with the sun still glaring overhead and a small inferno brewing inside.

Sasabe slapped his hands proudly on his hips once all eyes turned to his creation, obviously waiting for their compliments, but his guests proved tardy in delivering their praise. Rei had to take his glasses off to wipe them, Nagisa was conspicuously melting, Haru kept losing moisture, and Makoto panted for air.

“Why are we having a hot pot in this weather?” he spoke at last for the first time since he had greeted Rei and Nagisa at practice. A moment later, Kou attempted to walk through the doorway with a tray of seven glasses and a bottle of barley tea, then nearly dropped her cargo as she reeled back from another burst of steam.

“ _Hot…!_ ” she gasped as she took a deep breath to brave the sauna inside.

“Because that’s what sports medicine recommends for swimmers,” came the no-nonsense reply from Sasabe. “This is my special Sasabe Hot Pot, with plenty of protein and minerals,” he sank down into his own seat at the head of the table, pulling another tray of assorted vegetables and a small pile of shrimp closer to himself so he could add some to the pot on request.

“Can you at least turn on the air conditioning?” moaned Nagisa like a zombie.

“No such thing,” replied Sasabe, who had grown used to a house fitted with only the bare necessities for comfort. Nagisa groaned, but eventually scooted a little closer to the electric fan. Rei finally defogged his glasses enough to put them back on.

“Can we not do this?” he muttered, staring at the hot pot in disdain.

“Why would you say that?” scoffed Sasabe as he took up his chopsticks to compose a bowlful of his hot pot’s finest wares for Rei, sticking a crab leg on top for embellishment before reaching the bowl out for him to take. “I promise it’s good food, so dig in,” he said, nudging the bowl towards his guest, but by doing so, he inadvertently unleashed a puff of steam that fogged up Rei’s glasses once more. Rei ended up reaching out blindly to receive his food, putting it down at once to wipe his glasses again.

A few feet away, Ama-chan braced herself, then plucked up a small mushroom with her chopsticks. She scrunched her eyes shut as she popped it in her mouth, excepting it to burn with more than just the heat, but all she got was a rich yet refreshing tomato flavor, while the mushroom all but melted on her tongue.

“Wow, it really is good!” she breathed with her hand in front of her mouth.

“See?” replied Sasabe with a grin. Ama-chan flashed him an appreciative smile.

Now that someone had tasted the food and lived, everyone else braved up to try the hot pot as well. Nagisa took out a rubber band from his pocket to pull his bushy front bangs into a tuft on top of his head, then took as much of everything within his reach as the dimensions of his small bowl allowed. To his side, Makoto and Haruka settled for whatever was closest to them, while Kou picked and chose at a more leisurely pace, not afraid to lean as far as necessary to get the piece she wanted. She tried a cube of tofu.

“Ah, a tomato hot pot!” she gasped as she turned to Sasabe, who nodded proudly.

“We came up with this recipe when I was still in the swim club,” he explained as the others tucked in, Nagisa scarfing down his portion at an unnecessarily high speed. Haru finally managed to coax an entire scallop in his mouth. Makoto was still gasping for air between bites of sausage, while Rei had to stop altogether to wipe his glasses clean again.

“Oh, right, you are a former Iwatobi Swim Club member, aren’t you, Sasabe-san?” asked Ama-chan after another bite. Sasabe hummed over his mouthful of crab.

“Yes, and I was their last member, too,” he replied, wiping his forehead before giving a hot pot a stir. “I was the youngest on the team, so when the others graduated, I was the only one left. I couldn’t find any new members that year, so the swim club was abolished after I graduated.”

Rei was now working on the second lens. Meanwhile, Nagisa successfully finished his crab leg, so he finally had room to talk.

“But then we brought the swim club back, so you should have been coaching us from the very beginning, Goro-chan,” he groused as his eyes flitted from the hot pot in the middle of the table to Rei’s bowl at the edge of it. The bowl won by greater proximity, so Nagisa nabbed a mushroom from the top, ignoring Rei’s outrage at his shameless theft. Sasabe gave the pot another stir.

“I was busy with my job,” he replied as his chopsticks plunged deeper in the tomato sauce in the hopes of uncovering some squid from the bottom. “I always deliver in the afternoons and you had classes in the morning until now, so it wouldn’t have worked out. I had to ask for a day off as it is so I could invite you and make up for having missed out on prefecturals.”

He finally struck gold, a supple stuffed squid pierced shut with a toothpick.

“Do you want this? There’s rice inside,” said Sasabe as he lifted out the squid, holding it up for Nagisa to see. Nagisa’s eyes lit up with glee.

“Give it to me!” he said greedily, reaching out his bowl for Sasabe, but just as Goro tried to tip the squid into the bowl, his chopsticks slipped and the squid dropped against the edge, rolling back into the hot pot with a splash. Nagisa let out a yelp as he jumped backwards, his back knocking against the table behind them to send a pile of magazines toppling onto the floor like a stack of leafy dominoes.

“Oh no,” gasped Ama-chan, putting her bowl down at once to gather the magazines her students – her charges, her children – managed to put in disarray on their visit to someone else’s house.

“Sorry, are you okay, Nagisa?” blurted Sasabe, slapping the chopsticks down so he could crawl over to the table, hoping to pick up his mess before his guest might put him to shame. Nagisa reached behind himself, pulling one of the magazines into his hands before either Ama-chan or Sasabe could take it.

“What are these?” he asked as he turned the issue in his hands, finding the cover rather bland for his tastes.

“Really old magazines?” shrugged Haruka.

“Oh, it’s okay,” mumbled Sasabe as he scooted closer to Ama-chan, pulling some of the magazines over to his side. “I’ll clean it up.”

He then proceeded to gather some of them into a loose pile, grabbing them by the sides, then tapping their bottoms to the floor to make an even stack. He set them down to gather the next batch, hoping their advisor wasn’t paying attention to the fact that several magazines had scantily clad models on the covers, the top cover of Sasabe’s stack featuring a young woman referred to as _the Water Nymph Marin_. Makoto took one look at the issue still in Nagisa’s hands and shook his head, supposing Coach Sasabe was simply the sort of person who didn’t like throwing anything away, not even old magazines.

In the meantime, Sasabe managed to claim a few more magazines, but the moment he leaned away, a gust of wind rushed inside on the wings of the electric fan and whipped up the pages of the top magazine on his stack, flipping it open at the pin-up section. Sasabe froze, staring down mesmerized as page after page turned in the sudden draft, all of them showcasing the gorgeous _Water Nymph Marin_ in swimsuits of all shapes and colors.

“Here, Sasabe-san,” he heard Amakata Miho’s voice, at which point Sasabe had to force himself to tear his eyes away from the Water Nymph kneeling in front of him with her ice cream held out to him, to a remarkably similar young woman on her knees, offering him the last magazine with that same genial smile…

“Ma—Marin-chan..!” stammered Sasabe, the magazine trembling in his hands.

Amakata Miho froze, but only for a second, and if Sasabe had not believed in magic before, watching the face of an angel transform into that of a screeching banshee within a fraction of a second convinced him that the Water Nymph was alive and well, but more terrifying than her demure looks suggested. At his discovery, Ama-chan let out a piercing shriek and tore the magazine out of Sasabe’s hands, hurling it full force across the room. The poor offending magazine missed the top of Makoto’s head by mere inches and landed in the hallway, sliding across the tiles before thudding unceremoniously against the wall.

Everyone stared after it, then turned to her stunned. Ama-chan cringed.

“ _There was a huge spider on it!_ ” she cried, flinging a hand in the general direction of the crumpled magazine. She could hardly hope to deter the others from taking a look this way, but she did at least succeed with Makoto, who slammed his bowl down onto the table and clasped a hand around Haru’s arm with a look of horror on his face. His other hand started raking through his hair a moment later, just in case the spider managed to fall in it when the magazine flew right over his head.

Sasabe’s face could have fried any number of the shrimp awaiting their turn on the tray. Ama-chan rose from her knees with her hands clenched.

“I think that got rid of it…” she muttered as she headed for the hallway, shooting Sasabe a look on the way that promised nothing short of murder if he dared open his mouth about _Water Nymph Marin_ in front of the children.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nagisa later returned to Kou's booth to fill out a form, in which he nominated Rei for every category except 'best muscles.' In the comments section, he wrote, _Because he's Rei-chan!_ Rei was not amused when he found out.
> 
> Makoto still won the poll by a landslide. His prize was a handcrafted calligraphic certificate, lovingly made by Chigusa, and signed by the Calligraphy Club, the Craft Club, and two guys from the track team.


	54. EPISODE 10: Disparate Heart Rate! - Part 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In the hallway, Ama-chan pinched up the fallen magazine by the base of its spine, lifting it away from herself as though it were something particularly filthy. Makoto, who had not stopped raking through his hair yet, shot her an anxious look, then visibly shrank out of her way as Ama-chan passed him to extend the magazine towards Sasabe once more, this time with a paper-thin smile that did not reach beyond the hard corners of her lips. Goro audibly swallowed as he took the slightly weather-beaten issue by its opposite end, locked into her piercing stare while the article exchanged hands, but once Ama-chan stepped away to take her seat, Goro finally dared lower his eyes, only to realize Nagisa had one more magazine in his hands.

Sasabe huffed. Nagisa blinked at him innocently, having quite forgotten about the magazine in all the commotion.

“ _Give me that!_ ” snapped Sasabe as he snatched the last issue out of Nagisa’s hands and slammed it on top of his now complete pile, fashioning it into a proper stack before hoisting it to his chest. He then turned to his guests with an apologetic grin.

“I uh, I’ll just put these away real quick,” he laughed awkwardly, ignoring the others’ confused looks. “One second!” added Sasabe as he spun around, hurrying past the opposite end of the table, lest he risk bumping into Ama-chan somehow and adding further insult to injury.

On the other end, Makoto’s hand still lingered in his hair, his grip on Haru’s arm as tight as ever. Haru endured his antics for a while, but when his arm broke into tingles on the verge of falling asleep in Makoto’s grip, he finally lifted his free arm to give Makoto’s hand a small but stern tap with his finger. Makoto released him at once, averting his gaze with guilty looks. He tucked that hand into his lap, the other scratching nervously at the base of his neck.

Haru sighed. He could feel his cheeks flush and his heart flutter as he braced himself to do the unthinkable, but once he opened his mouth to speak, there was no turning back.

“Here,” he said quietly, reaching out both hands towards Makoto’s head. The other looked perplexed, even more so as Haru simply clamped his hands on either side of Makoto’s face to pull his head closer, casually batting his friend’s hand away once Makoto hovered within easier reach. “Let me look.”

Makoto obediently dropped his hand into his lap to join the other, clasping them together to wring them as Haru’s fingers sank into his hair, combing through Makoto’s tufts more systematically than Makoto’s frantic swipes had. There were a lot of tufts and fringes to inspect, so Haru prodded about with gentle curiosity, internally marveling at how soft Makoto’s hair felt despite its porcupinesque appearance.

As he carried on, he could just feel Nagisa and Rei’s eyes on his back, while the ladies opposite him shot him looks that seared the tips of his ears red. Kou in particular was peering at him through the gaps of her fingers over her eyes, and Haru could have sworn Nagisa was _giggling_. Had they not been gawking at him like that, Haru might not have minded letting his hands wander for a little longer. As it were, he had to make do with a reasonably thorough investigation that yielded no spiders, withdrawing his hands carefully once he finished. His fingers brushed lightly against Makoto’s cheeks as they parted. Makoto’s own face looked bright red as he stared back at Haruka breathlessly. Haru tensed.

“There was no spider in your hair,” he said in a thick tone, turning his head. Makoto’s lips twitched into a tentative smile, then parted to thank him.

“Then it might be crawling on Mako-chan’s back!” said Nagisa from behind Haru’s back before Makoto could utter a syllable, startling him into a frightened yelp instead.

“ _Haruuu_ , _please get it off meee!_ ” he cried in terror, twitching left and right in a desperate attempt to peer down his own back while swinging his arms in a frenzy, which threatened to either knock his bowl and glass from the table, or hit Haru in the face any second. Nagisa could no longer smother his giggles, so he let them swell into laughter at Makoto’s reaction, at least until Haru clenched his jaw, lifted his hand, then promptly smacked Nagisa in the back, hard enough to knock the air out of him and snap Makoto out of his panic.

“Oh, what do you know. It was on Nagisa,” Haru said out loud, his tone even, but his eyes flashing something fierce at Nagisa as he made a show of wiping his hand to get rid of the remains of the imaginary spider. Nagisa coughed, his lips twitching into an uncomfortable grin as he peered back at Haruka.

“Touché, Haru-chan..” he choked, then scooted closer to Rei, who gave Haruka a hard look for the needlessly violent maneuver before turning back to Nagisa, whose pitiful glances and soft whimpers soon persuaded him to rub a hand over Nagisa’s back to soothe the sting of Haru’s swat. The culprit himself turned away from them, but one glance at Makoto caused him to fix his eyes on the table instead, his cheeks growing pink as Makoto lowered his head and mumbled a belated _thank you_. Ama-chan in turn leaned over to Kou, her hand cautiously lifted to her mouth.

“Are they always this _close_ , Matsuoka-san?” she whispered to her while the boys were distracted. Kou shrugged her shoulders with flushed cheeks, making a mental note to observe her fellow swim club members more closely in the future.

“I’m back!” called out Sasabe from the doorway, having disappeared into his bedroom to stash his magazines into the furthest corner of his closet, then realized there might be more issues elsewhere that required momentary disposal. He promptly hurried off to gather them from the bathroom, the kitchen, and the guest room, dumping them onto the already impressive stack in the closet before reemerging to tend to his guests.

“Is everyone enjoying their meal?” he asked next, shooting a nervous grin at Ama-chan.

As his hint at the free-for-all hot pot could not have come at a better time, Haru seized his bowl, filling it again from the cooker to avoid conversation with the others. Once one person moved, the others naturally followed suit to raid the hot pot, which soon bubbled away half empty as Nagisa loaded his bowl with enough crab for two. Everyone was gobbling away in a matter of moments, which Sasabe took as his cue to add half a dozen shrimp, along with some vegetables for more easy pickings. The moment he was done, he put his chopsticks down, turning to Ama-chan next.

“May I refill your glass?” he asked her in an obliging tone, lifting the bottle of barley tea sitting on another tray to offer it to her. Ama-chan paused, one hand curling to her chin.

“I think I had enough barley tea… You don’t happen to have some mineral water, do you, Sasabe-san?” she asked in a light tone. Goro gasped, then put down the bottle, jumping from his seat as soon as his hand was free to grab the tray.

“Mineral.. of course! I’ll bring you some in a moment!” he cried as he hurried off towards the kitchen.

“Please do,” she said with a little smile that looked just a bit too pleased.

* * *

From that moment onward, dinner progressed with no more incidents on either side. The only thing that changed aside from the contents of the hot pot was Sasabe Goro’s hospitality, which increased at an exponential rate once he realized he had managed to offend a water nymph who had chosen to disguise herself as a literature teacher to confuse misguided mortals like himself. To make amends, Goro immediately refilled her glasses (for now she had several) with whatever she had been drinking last, asked every five minutes if she was comfortable, and when it was time to put away the hot pot to make way for the chilled watermelon, Goro carried it all the way to the kitchen, where he made sure to put the nicest looking slices on the plate he planned to set down in front of her.

He soon reappeared with two trays, and to ensure his success, he set the choice tray in front of Ama-chan before setting the other in front of Haruka, where the boys gathered a moment later to take a slice each.

“You can take that tray outside if you want,” said Sasabe, nodding towards the terrace stretching beyond the living room doors. “Since we’re sending off the trimester with a bang, I got you some fireworks.”

“Really?! Awesome!” cried Nagisa, bouncing in his seat as giddy as a child. Sasabe nodded with a hum.

As soon as Ama-chan picked up a slice of watermelon to eat, Sasabe slipped outside, returning with a lighter and a bucket, which held over a dozen senko hanabi sparklers. He set the bucket down in the grass, within easy reach of the terrace, then placed the lighter nearby. With everything set, he walked back inside again to take his seat, grabbing a slice of watermelon for himself on the way.

“Just take them all out of the bucket, and throw the lit ones in there if there’s any trouble,” he told the boys, then took a large bite of his watermelon.

Having encouraged them so generously, Rei proceeded to carry their tray outside, where the others joined him to pick their fireworks.

“Are you coming too, Kou-chan?” asked Nagisa with a grin. Kou blinked.

“Oh! Maybe in a minute,” she replied with a smile. “Coach Sasabe,” she turned to Goro next, lowering her voice. “Where is the bathroom?”

“Ah, it’s.. to the left, at the end of the hall,” replied Sasabe, now thoroughly glad he remembered to get rid of every magazine. Kou thanked him as she parted from the table, leaving Ama-chan and Sasabe to themselves, while the boys now gathered outside by the bucket, each one waiting to lit their sparklers. Makoto picked up the lighter first, so he ended up lighting the first round, suppressing laughter when Nagisa brandished his in excitement.

“Look, look, Rei-chan!” he laughed, then began chasing Rei around, who kept crying _Don’t point that at me!_ as he ran circles in the backyard, his own sparkler drawing golden streaks against the evening sky. Sitting on the edge of the terrace, Makoto offered the lighter to Haruka, but his friend declined, letting Makoto light his own first.

Haru watched the tip swell with a glow, until it bloomed into a dozen yellow sparks. Makoto held it out in front of him, and after a deep breath, Haru reached out his own sparkler, touching its tip gingerly to Makoto’s. Once it sparked, Haru drew it back, holding it out in front of himself just like his friend did.

“I can’t remember the last time I did fireworks,” he said in a distant tone. Makoto’s face softened into a smile.

“I can’t, either.”

* * *

Inside, Sasabe and Ama-chan continued to eat their slices of watermelon in silence, the former shooting nervous glances at the latter as she daintily nibbled the last bits of sweet fruit off the rind.

 _I was told your previous job involved swimsuits, but I never thought… No wonder you looked so familiar,_ murmured Goro in no more than a whisper, gathering his courage to speak, this time with due respect to his favorite swim suit model in the whole wide world. He cleared his throat, then straightened in his seat, knees tucked firmly together.

“I—I was a big fan, M-Marin-cha—”

_SNAP._

Goro froze, the rest of his words lodged in his throat as he stared horrified at the rind Ama-chan had snapped in two with a sickening crunch.

“Not another word on that topic,” said Ama-chan in a sharp tone as she set the broken halves of the rind down on the tray. She straightened again, now wearing one of her showroom smiles. “I’m sure you understand.”

“Y-Yes,” mumbled Sasabe.

The next moment, they heard a loud gasp from further in, where Kou had since exited the bathroom, but was detained on her way back by one of the doors, cracked ajar just enough to invite her curious gaze. Through that centimeter of a slit, she could glimpse shelves with certificates and awards, undoubtedly from Sasabe’s glory days… and though chances were slim, the burning desire to check them, and perhaps happen upon some small token of Onii-chan’s former glory spurred her to slip inside.

“Look what I found!” she cried a moment later.

“Huh? What’s up?” called out Nagisa from outside, the boys gathering into a tight cluster by the terrace in wait for Kou to reappear. Presently, she rushed into the living room, holding something distinctly book-like.

“Wait, Matsuoka-san!” squeaked Ama-chan as Kou hurried past her.

“Hey, don’t snoop around!” joined in Sasabe, his face beading with cold sweat, but it was too late. Kou reached the others before they could stop her, holding out her prize for them to see – a large, thick photo album emblazoned with _My Memories_ on the cover.

“It’s a photo album of the Iwatobi Swimming Club!” chirped Kou.

“Oooh!” breathed the swim club in unison, even Makoto showing some interest.

Behind Kou, Ama-chan and Goro let out a sigh of relief, exchanging weary glances as Kou sank to her knees on the terrace, showcasing the treasure she had found in Coach Sasabe’s bedroom, just two steps away from the closet with its printed contraband.

* * *

Once everyone found a place to settle down around Kou – Nagisa crouching in front of her, Haru and Makoto sitting to her right, Rei perched on her left, and Goro placing a pillow near her for Ama-chan before plopping down on his idol’s left side –, Kou finally opened the album for their reminiscing pleasure. Just as she had advertised, the album held a compilation of the most notable moments of Sasabe Goro’s coaching career at the Iwatobi Swimming Club, so it began with pictures taken on the very day he had joined to teach there. On the first picture of page one, a small group of children gathered around in matching swim shorts and one-piece suits, a few adults standing behind them in different but equally uniform bodyskins.

“These are from when I was just a trainee,” explained Sasabe, pointing to each of the adult figures around him to introduce them to the others, waiting to see if any of them recognized his former colleagues. Even Makoto peered over from the edge of the circle with piqued curiosity as he spotted a familiar face (the man who had taught him how to swim, whom Sasabe identified as one of the first coaches of the Iwatobi Swimming Club), but he was more eager to see something he had never before had the pleasure of: a young Nanase Haruka, happier and more carefree than his older, much suffered counterpart.

In such hopes, however, Makoto was sorely mistaken. From the earliest moments of Haruka’s appearance in the photographs, Makoto could tell his friend had a very lonely start at the Iwatobi Swimming Club. Sasabe’s first picture of Haru was made on the day Haruka joined at the start of fourth grade. He was apparently called upon to pose for a group picture, wearing the same kind of yellow-striped turquoise swim shorts as the other children around him. Everyone looked on calmly or grinned with delight at having their picture taken, but nine-year-old Haruka outright glared at the viewer, his head arched forward in resentment.

“Oh, I remember this!” laughed Sasabe, pointing at that mean-looking little face as soon as he spotted it in the crowd. “We were gathered for a group photo at the start of the term, and Haruka kept turning his head away even though my supervisor told him to look at the camera, and that you’re supposed to smile for pictures. She could make him look in the end, but he refused to smile.”

Haru tensed and turned his head, his shoulder bonking slightly against Makoto’s.

“That is so like Haru-chan!” giggled Nagisa, even Kou and Rei joining him, but Makoto could not so much as crack a smile, his features hardening in concentration as he searched the photograph for clues. Nine-year-old Haruka was standing on the very edge of the group, with a relatively large gap between him and the boy on his left. From the way the others seemed to orient away from him, Makoto was forced to deduce that Haruka made no friends that day.

He hoped subsequent pictures would alter this sad impression, but again, he was mistaken. Each time Haru showed up, all the way to fifth grade, he either glared at the camera or faced away from his peers. He never stood next to the same person twice, either, while the other children appeared to gravitate towards each other in small, familiar constellations. The more Makoto looked, the more those angry expressions pained him, and each time Sasabe provided some further proof of Haru’s aloofness, Haru himself twisted away just a little more, burrowing into Makoto’s side without being the least bit aware of it.

Fortunately, another turn of the pages finally brought something more amusing than the upset glares of young Nanase Haruka. The last picture on the current page was of him again, swimming front crawl in the pool, which would not have been very remarkable, had it not been for the fact that Haru was wearing a frilly pink one-piece, one that was definitely not designed with boys in mind. The others immediately burst into giggles. Everyone, in fact, except Haru, Makoto, and strangely, Nagisa.

“Now _this_ I would love to know the story behind,” said Sasabe as he pointed to Haruka’s unorthodox swimsuit. “We always issued new swimsuits to club members at the start of the term, so by this time, he had to have received a pair of swim shorts courtesy of the Swimming Club, but one day he just showed up in this thing and wore it for the whole swimming lesson like nobody’s business.”

Makoto quirked his brow, stealing a glance at his friend, who stared at that picture with little more than irritation. Nagisa, on the other hand, looked rather pale to Makoto, but no one else paid him any heed, not when they were too transfixed on Haruka’s one-piece to notice anything around them.

“Well, Haruka? Are you going to tell us what that was about?” teased Sasabe with a jovial grin, but Haru merely turned away in slow motion, his eyes briefly meeting Nagisa’s as he careened his head away from the others.

“No,” he replied, his tone plain and flat. Sasabe laughed. Nagisa let out a small sigh, caught by no one else but Makoto.

“Oh well,” came Sasabe’s reply. “But ah, I think Nagisa and Rei will be showing up any second now,” he went on, waiting for Kou to turn the next page. He immediately pointed to a group photo, where two small figures stood next to Haruka, who was now clad in his regular pink-striped turquoise swim shorts. “There they are, already together!”

“We hadn’t known each other back then, or been introduced to Haruka-senpai at that time, I believe,” spoke Rei with a small fix of his glasses, “but I remember how I watched him swim and felt that I wanted to swim like that.”

Haru flushed. Nagisa finally regained his former cheerfulness.

“Rei-chan and I started talking soon after,” he added with a grin.

“I was Ryuugazaki-kun to you back then,” mumbled Rei, his eyes averted in a pout. Nagisa laughed.

“A Ryuugazaki-kun is just a Rei-chan in the making,” he replied with a wink.

Rei shot him a glare that demanded an explanation, but he received none. Nevertheless, the welcome change of their appearance made Makoto’s shoulders slump in relief, as he realized Haru would no longer be standing so alone in group pictures. Just as Nagisa and Rei tended to cluster together, they also stuck to Haruka like living magnets, usually appearing on one side of him, depending on how close Haru stood to the center of the group.

“These bring back memories!” sighed Nagisa, immersing himself in their reminiscing with greater ease than before. He now eagerly awaited more pictures of himself, Rei, and Haruka, gasping in delight when the next turn of the page brought new photos of them together.

“This is when we had a barbeque behind the club!”

“What? Nobody told me about that!” cried Kou in disappointment. Rei gave her an apologetic smile.

“I believe it happened before Rin-senpai joined the swimming club,” he explained as he gazed affectionately at their younger effigies. In that particular picture, everyone was standing behind two large grills, most of the children holding shish kebabs on wooden spits. Haruka had a grilled onigiri in his hands, his expression just as stern as before. To his left, Rei had struck a beautiful pose with his shish kebab, holding it into the air like the photographer had caught him in the middle of a brilliant fencing maneuver. Between the two of them stood Nagisa, flashing a victory sign at the camera, his cheeks bulging with a mouthful of his own shish kebab.

“Nanase-kun looks so mature in these,” said Ama-chan kindly.

“And again, no smile,” chided Sasabe. Nagisa grinned.

“Haru-chan is always smiling on the inside,” he said with a wink at Kou, who remembered the first time she heard that phrase, and couldn’t help but laugh again. Haru turned his head once more, pressing against Makoto’s shoulder in his attempt to escape conversation, and though Makoto was content to sit on the edge, he would have gladly traded places to spare his friend from so much unwanted attention.

A few pages later, another picture brought them to an outdoor pool, where the Iwatobi Swimming Club stood together, all except for four children sitting in front of them to showcase their respective trophies. Haruka sat to the left with Rei and Nagisa behind him. He had apparently won first place, judging by the looks of the large golden trophy tied with red and white ribbon in front of him, but not even his victory could induce him to smile as he held out his certificate.

“This is from the summer tournament, when Nagisa-kun and I were in fourth grade,” said Rei, admiring that younger self looming tall and proud beside tiny Nagisa, who decided to behave for a change and stood with his hands tucked by his sides. Everyone was admiring the trophy, but Kou’s eyes widened at something in the background. Just right of the group, she could see four figures standing close together, wearing matching blue and yellow swim shorts that she knew once belonged to Sano Elementary. Medals hung from their necks, and one of them had a suspiciously long mop of reddish hair…

“Huh?” she blurted, pressing the tip of her finger to that small, familiar figure in the back. “Is that Onii-chan..?”

Makoto froze. Everyone else stared in excitement, or in Haru’s case, something approximating vague interest.

“We didn’t know Rin yet,” he said quietly.

This time, it was Makoto who turned his head away.

“Wow! So we met before we even got to know each other!” cried Nagisa in joy.

“So connected by the red string of fate,” added Ama-chan with a sagely smile. Kou quirked her brow.

“Do you really call it that when it’s between boys?” she asked her, but Ama-chan merely shrugged her shoulders with a squeak, while Sasabe reached out to turn the page, then a few more in rapid succession, as though he were searching for something.

“Here we go! This is where Rin starts showing up,” he said at last, pointing to a picture of the club members, who appeared to be outside the swimming club making snow sculptures. “This was in early February, I think. I know Haruka went missing for like three weeks in January, and a few days after he returned in February, it snowed so hard we decided to have a little fun.”

Makoto risked a glance at the picture, his stomach clenching. On that previous image of the poolside, Rin was so small Makoto could hardly make him out, but now he stood in the front between Haruka and Rei, with Nagisa to Rei’s right. They formed a neat row together, Haru glaring at Rin as he held what looked like a small snow dolphin, while Rin grinned back at him hunched over his own sculpture of a shark’s head emerging from the concrete. To his right, Rei was putting the finishing touches on a larger than life rockhopper penguin sculpture more reminiscent of Picasso than the animal itself, while on the other side of the penguin, Nagisa stood on his tiptoes, holding up a snow butterfly studded with pebbles for decoration. Once Makoto managed to take it all in, his eyes drifted back to Haru and Rin, who already seemed locked into a small-scale rivalry. Though Haru looked morose ( _Had he ever been happy at the swimming club..?_ ), Rin grinned at him playfully, reminding Makoto of a tiger cub, young and wild and sharp-toothed even back then.

While he mused on, the pages turned.

“There’s Kou-chan!” Makoto heard Nagisa say, and when his gaze caught up, his heart skipped a beat. Once again, the other four boys were standing in a row, this time in the lobby of the Iwatobi Swimming Club, and to Rin’s arm clung a little girl in a dress, a little girl with her red pony tail…

 _No… No, no, no, no, no,_ reeled Makoto, whipping his head away. Had he really seen Kou-chan on the pier that day? The little girl had a sibling, he recalled that much, but having stood on the girl’s side, Makoto just barely registered that she had an older brother or sister by her side. _A brother, then_ , thought Makoto, his face scrunched up. _Kou-chan, I’m so sorry…_

The page turned without Makoto noticing.

“And this,” he heard Sasabe say, “was taken when you were training for the tournament. Rin was really fired up!”

Laughter. Kou’s voice in the crowd.

“That’s so like Onii-chan!” she giggled, and Makoto looked no more.

* * *

Fortunately for Makoto, his torment did not last too long. After a couple more pages, Haruka disappeared from the photographs entirely ( _Because of Rin,_ thought Makoto bitterly), and even Rei and Nagisa went missing sometime after, having been taken out of the swimming club upon their graduation from elementary. The rest would have been just pages upon pages of unfamiliar faces, so Sasabe closed the album, everyone suddenly conscious that the sky had turned its coldest, darkest shade of blue.

“It’s getting rather late,” risked Ama-chan with a glance at the blackened horizon.

“I suppose we should probably head to the station,” said Rei, looking to Nagisa-kun, who shrugged his shoulders with a smile.

“Alright,” grinned Sasabe. “Come with me, then,” he added as he rose from his seat, coaxing the group after him. He walked them right to his front door, where he waited for the group to sort themselves out. As Ama-chan had promised to take Kou back to her grandmother’s house, they gathered by her car, while the four boys determined to walk down the road together, at least until the turn brought Nagisa and Rei closer to the train station. When everyone was ready to leave at last, they said their goodbyes, Kou waving from the passenger’s seat until Ama-chan’s pink car melted into the distance.

The boys and Sasabe remained standing by the door for a moment longer.

“Well, good night, and I’ll see you all tomorrow,” said Goro, then seemed to pause. “When is the ending ceremony?”

“At nine o’clock,” replied Rei. Sasabe scratched his chin.

“How long is that? An hour?”

“Half an hour or so, I think,” said Nagisa with a shrug.

“Then I’ll see you at ten by the pool,” replied Sasabe, waving as the boys began their long walk home, and only heading inside once they had disappeared from view.

* * *

“That was fun! We should drop by again!” sighed Nagisa contentedly as he sauntered to the front, Rei and Haru close behind him with Makoto bringing up the rear.

“A hot pot in the middle of summer, though…” muttered Rei, who had to clean his glasses some seven times while the obnoxious steam machine remained in the living room.

“But it tasted good, right?” said Nagisa, glancing back to Haru and Makoto for affirmation, but getting no reply beyond a shrug from Haruka, and absolutely no response from Makoto, whose eyes swept the concrete with every step as he shuffled behind the group.

“What’s wrong, Mako-chan?” asked Nagisa. At his words, Rei and Haru stopped to look at Makoto, who finally twitched to a halt at the mention of his name. He lifted his eyes just enough to look at the others. Nagisa stared at him confused, but Haru and Rei looked nothing short of alarmed.

“I um, nothing really,” replied Makoto with a troubled smile. “I was just thinking… about your relationship with Rin,” he risked in an innocent tone.

“In elementary, you mean?” asked Nagisa. Makoto nodded. “We never did tell you about us and Rin-chan, did we?”

Makoto slowly shook his head. Haru tensed and turned his, but in spite of his apparent discomfort, Makoto could no longer ignore his own.

“Would you mind telling me more about the four of you before we go home?” he asked quietly, his tone pleading. “I think it would help me understand Rin better…”

Nagisa glanced to Rei, who in turn looked to Haruka, but the captain could not be reached for comment. Though he turned back just enough to include himself, his eyes were fixed on Makoto with guarded features, his fists clenching by his sides.

“Well, I don’t see why not,” said Rei at last. “I believe we have at least twenty minutes before Nagisa-kun and I have to leave. All in favor, then?” he continued, his eyes once again on the captain, who finally graced him with a shrug of his shoulders that Rei chalked up as a vote in favor. Nagisa nodded emphatically. A moment later, Haru took a small step towards Makoto.

“I don’t know if there’s any point in talking about this now,” he said quietly, his eyes kept carefully to Makoto’s left. “But if you really want to talk, we can go down to the beach and talk there,” continued Haru, nodding to an opening in the concrete barrier where the hill crumbled towards the beach in rocky cascades, flattish steps carved into them for locals and tourists to climb. Makoto nodded, so Haru walked ahead to lead them downwards, the others following in uneasy silence.

* * *

Down at the shore, Haru walked his friends over to a large formation of rocks overgrown with moss and vegetation. Rei and Nagisa settled down by the rocks. Haru and Makoto remained standing.

“Rin was obsessed with relays from the moment he joined the swimming club, but he didn’t tell us why until right before the final,” began Haruka, his features softening as he faded into the back of his mind, in search for that conversation in the locker room, just before that fated relay took place.

_They were standing in a circle by their lockers, the others hardly able to contain their excitement. Nagisa balled his small hands into fists, bouncing on his heels. Rei kept fixing his glasses as his tense features caused them to slip down the ridge of his nose every two minutes, while Rin grinned from ear to ear like a Cheshire Cat. Haru felt like he was the only one who could look forward to the relay with anything like indifference. Having been roped into it so forcefully, he regarded it as little more than an annoying obligation, a strange game Rin wanted to play before he left._

_“It’s finally time for the final,” spoke Rin. “Thanks for doing this for me, guys.”_

_“What do you mean by that, Rin-senpai?” asked Rei, his brow quirked as his hands slapped on his hips. “We are doing this for ourselves as a team, aren’t we?”_

_Rin looked surprised, but composed himself quickly enough to laugh._

_“Right… of course we are,” he replied, closing his eyes for a long moment. When he opened them again, his face had grown somber. “I wasn’t sure if I should tell you guys, but win or lose, the next race will be our last. So I’ll talk,” he said, taking a deep breath._

_Haru furrowed his brow, his hands clenching into fists. The moment of truth had arrived at last. After all these months, he would finally know why Rin had hounded him so relentlessly to swim a relay._

_“My dad was one of the first members of the Iwatobi Swimming Club,” began Rin. “When he was in sixth grade, he was part of a medley relay and placed first in the tournament. His dream was to become an Olympic swimmer. But in the end, he became a fisherman, and he died in an accident.”_

_Nagisa and Rei’s eyes widened. Haru’s eyes narrowed._ Makoto’s heart gave a painful leap.

_“I’ve decided to go to Australia,” continued Rin. “But I thought, if I could join my dad’s swimming club first and win the medley relay, I might be able to share his dream. I know I’m being selfish, but I want us to be the best team around! I don’t know who was on my dad’s team, but I’m sure they were the best. I hope we can become the best, too!”_

“We won the medley relay, and the next day, Rin went to Australia to a swimming school. The rest, you already know,” said Haruka, shooting a sheepish glance at Makoto. Having caught his friend’s meaning, Makoto nodded.

“Good times,” sighed Nagisa with a smile as he rolled his head over to Rei, but Rei did not share his happy nostalgia of the relay. Somewhere along the way, his brow had creased heavily in something akin to confusion, even irritation.

“What’s wrong, Rei-chan?” asked Nagisa, his tone worried. Rei finally looked up, his posture tense.

“Actually… there’s something that’s been bothering me for quite some time,” he replied, his eyes drifting to Haruka. “We swam a great relay and then parted on good terms with Rin-senpai, who even promised he would write to us from Australia, and for a while, we held a weekly correspondence. But one week, he stopped replying to our letters, even though Nagisa-kun sent him at least three more to be safe, and when we finally saw him again after so many years, I was struck by how coldly he behaved. He was very rude to Nagisa-kun and I, and almost hostile towards Haruka-senpai, and I kept wondering, _why?_ We bonded as a team and won the medley relay, so why is everything so _different_ now?

Haru tensed. A moment later, Makoto twitched nervously.

“Aaah, um, it’s getting really late now,” he said with an awkward laugh, taking a step towards Rei and Nagisa in an attempt to draw attention away from Haru. “I think we should all be heading home—”

“Makoto.”

Makoto flinched as he turned to Haruka. The other lifted his hand dismissively.

“It’s fine,” he said softly. “I’ll tell them.”

Makoto drew back at once, clasping a hand over his wrist self-consciously. Rei and Nagisa stared at Haruka wide-eyed. Haru closed his eyes.

“During the winter break of my first year in middle school, I ran into Rin while he was visiting.”

_Even though it was now the middle of December, the weather was mild and sunny. Haru sighed contentedly. Winter break at long last._

_Not that Iwatobi Junior High had been very taxing on him so far. Having grown used to the Iwatobi Swimming Club, Haru continued to attend practice with Nagisa and Rei, but he also joined his school’s swim club, as being a member of at least one club was compulsory. Fortunately, or so it seemed at the time, Haruka had made the right choice by joining the swim club. Only two other first years joined, both from his class, which precluded their forming a relay team in their age group; and as neither got along with the other, Haru felt perfectly justified in ignoring both of them, no matter how often they congregated around his desk at lunch time to argue with each other. As for the rest of his classmates, Haruka eventually found Rin’s successor in the form of one Shigino Kisumi, who sat in front of Haruka, and often turned back to talk at him._

_Kisumi had heard of Haruka from Rin, having gone to Sano Elementary with him, and the avid praise of their mutual friend proved enough recommendation for Kisumi to take interest in Haruka himself. Despite the fact that Haru resisted his every attempt at securing him for the basketball club, Kisumi proved as persistent as Rin used to be, and made for a charming and talkative companion during breaks and lunch time, annoying Haru to no end with his overly familiar attitude and popularity. Kisumi’s light hair, purple eyes, and pleasant demeanor drew the girls to him in droves, but while Kisumi tolerated their attention, he seemed to take greater delight in Haruka’s apparent jealousy of them._

_At the start of each break, Kisumi would initiate conversation with Haruka, and each break without fail, the girls would come flocking. Haru could sulk, glare, turn away, or pout all he wanted, but in the end, the girls always managed to claim Kisumi, who then teased Haru, laughed at him, and called him ‘cold’ for being such a sourpuss. Haru often thought of arguing with him, of telling him it was no good, but cowardice held him back. As much as Kisumi tugged him along on a leash sometimes, Haru felt he wouldn’t have minded it so much if he could have just had Kisumi to himself more. Loud and obnoxious though he was, Kisumi nonetheless filled a void in his chest, nestling into a hollow Rin had carved for himself before he grinned at Haru and left forever._

_In such denial of his loneliness, swimming remained Haru’s prime comfort. Even on that day, he had just left the Iwatobi Swimming Club, stopping in front of the closed gate at the railway crossing in wait for the bar to rise. He suppressed a yawn and wiped his eyes. He heard footsteps on the other side._

_He looked up. His heart gave a leap._

Rin, back in Iwatobi…?

_“Rin!” cried Haru, startling the other into looking up, then stare back just as surprised as Haruka felt, his lips parting in shock._

_“Haru—”_

_The train rushed between them, cutting them off for a long moment, but once it passed, the gate finally rose in its wake. Haru hurried to the other side, his heart fluttering in his chest like the wings of a hummingbird. Rin was back. Rin had come back for him after all._

_“You’re back?” he breathed, hardly daring to believe it was true. He might have pinched his arm, had he not thought he might look silly in front of the other._

_“Yeah,” replied Rin, his tone soft and calm. Haru lowered his eyes, his cheeks a little too warm for his liking._

_“You could have called,” he mumbled, eyes averted._

_“That would have been a little embarrassing, don’t you think..?” laughed Rin uneasily. “How are you doing? Still swimming?”_

_“Yeah,” replied Haru with more willingness to speak than he had ever felt before, as Rin’s reappearance had unleashed a yearning that had long lain dormant, the desire for someone his age to whom he felt truly connected. “I still go to the Swimming Club, but I also joined the swim club at Iwatobi Junior High. The school has a pretty big pool, and—”_

_“Hey, Haru.”_

_The interruption caught Haru off guard, stunning him into silence. There was a dark, hungry glint in the other’s eyes as Rin smiled and arched his head._

_“Let’s swim together again… and see who’s faster.”_

_“Okay,” agreed Haru, a nervous energy bubbling in his chest. Rin grinned._

_The two of them were soon running down the road, Rin overtaking Haru several times as they raced back to the Iwatobi Swimming Club. Haru could tell Rin had been running. He himself hadn’t tried it since the accident._

_They seemed to arrive just in time. Everyone else had gone home, but Sasabe Goro was still there, just about to lock the entrance when the boys skidded to a halt in front of him._

_“Oh, it’s Rin!” cried Sasabe when they said hello. “You’re back?”_

_“Yeah,” replied Rin. “Hey, can we swim some?”_

_“Sure, the pool’s reserved for us right now anyway,” replied Coach Sasabe as he pulled out the key, then pushed the entrance open for them. Rin jogged inside. Haru followed a moment later, his chest so light his feet hardly touched the ground. After so long, he might see it again… The sight only Rin could show him._

_They changed into swim shorts, caps, and goggles, soon stepping onto the starting blocks in the middle. Sasabe took out his whistle and stopwatch as they curled into position._

_“Ready. Set. Go…!”_

_The race was a blur, no more than a rush of adrenaline in Haru’s memory. He could not even recall his feelings until they had climbed out of the pool, and Sasabe told them Haru had won by more than a second... but he remembered Rin, Rin falling to his knees and slamming his fist on the tiles, tears pouring from his eyes as his loss sank in._

_Haru’s heart hammered, his overwhelming gladness long gone. When he at last stepped forward to offer his hand, Rin pushed himself to his feet and rushed past him, his goggles falling from his grip to the floor. They clicked against the ground. Frozen into place, Haru could only watch as Rin ran off to the locker room, at least until Coach Sasabe placed a hand on his shoulder._

_“Go talk to him,” he said as he nudged Haruka forward._

_With no other alternative before him, Haru hurried after Rin, who was already tugging his shirt over his wet skin. Haru quickly toweled himself off, then dug out his clothes from the locker, the two now caught in another race of who would dress and leave first._

_Rin won, and sprinted out at once. Haru followed a few seconds later, still in slippers and having left his scarf behind._

_“Wait, Rin!” he cried, his hand shooting forward to grab Rin’s wrist. “What’s wrong? You’ve been acting strange today..!”_

_Rin tensed in his grip, and the next second, he tore himself away so violently that Haru reeled back instinctively, Rin’s fist missing his face by mere inches as he shoved it backwards and out of Haruka’s hold._

_“I quit,” said Rin. Haru’s heart stopped._

_“_ What? _”_

_“I’ll never swim again,” hissed Rin._

_He then ran, ran down the corridor and out of the Iwatobi Swimming Club, leaving Haruka behind for good._

_After that, Haru walked to the Swimming Club every day during winter break in the hopes of seeing him again, but Rin appeared no more, and with each day, Haruka felt just a little more guilty, and resentful, and lonely… and angry. Guilty for hurting Rin. Resentful, for letting himself be dragged into a friendship that had left him stranded. Lonely, horribly, terrifyingly lonely… and angry he could trust no one, nobody at all._

_Soon enough, the third trimester began, and the very moment two girls hailed Kisumi after first period, Haru finally snapped and found himself saying something vile to Kisumi. It was the impulse of the moment; he could no longer remember the words. All he could recall was how the girls stormed off, how Kisumi forced a laugh and called him ‘cold’ like he usually did… and how the two of them never spoke to each other again for the rest of the year._

“I never knew that happened,” mumbled Nagisa in a small voice, he and Rei staring at Haru in wide-eyed concern, and Makoto, with aching tenderness.

“I couldn’t tell anyone back then,” replied Haru, his eyes inadvertently drifting to Makoto, who had to resist the urge to step forward and pull him close. If only… _If only…_

“Is that why you decided to quit swimming competitively, Haruka-senpai?” asked Rei. Haru stood motionless, his head hanging, but Makoto nodded in his place with hardened features.

“Haru felt guilty, thinking he had hurt Rin by winning their race,” he said out loud, his heart thumping hard. Rin’s cruelty was no longer a secret. Now Rei and Nagisa could surely see how much pain Rin had caused, and finally reconsider chasing after him…

“But, your race the other day should have put an end to this conflict, right, Haruka-senpai?” spoke Rei again, this time with a calm smile. “You had given it your all, but this time it was Rin-senpai who won the race, so it would be best if you put the past behind yourself, and moved forward just as he is doing right now. In fact, I am absolutely certain that Rin-senpai has put this incident behind himself, and would like to reconcile to us at last!”

“ _What..?_ ” blurted Makoto, his face pale, but Rei merely smirked and fixed his glasses, nodding to Nagisa as he caught his friend’s gestures to keep silent about the details.

“I have very good reason to suppose that Rin-senpai is entering the relay in order to meet us again at the tournament, and revive our former friendly competition,” explained Rei with his hands on his hips. “He has shown a strong desire to relive that relay we swam together, this time as a member of the Samezuka relay team.”

Makoto’s chest burst into shards of ice, but Haru stared at Rei in dreamlike surprise.

“So Rin…”

“…wants to be friends again, Haru-chan!” replied Nagisa with a grin, apparently sharing Rei’s opinion and sources of information. “Isn’t it great?”

Makoto wanted to scream, but he suppressed the urge and cleared his throat to speak.

“But, that doesn’t _make any sense_ ,” he pleaded, his hands raised as if he were begging them to see reason. “Why would Rin enter the relay after what had happened between him and Haru? He wasn’t even part of the Samezuka relay team at prefecturals, so why enter the relay now, when he can meet you at the tournament anyway since he had advanced in freestyle? It’s just plain _weird!_ ”

Rei and Nagisa blinked at him. Haru tensed. Makoto flinched.

“Haru..?” he whispered, his voice laden with guilt. Haru’s shoulders slumped as their eyes met, his face perfectly calm.

“I don’t understand it either,” he replied, his lips twitching into a small smile. “But… for some reason, I’m looking forward to racing Rin again.”

Rei and Nagisa grinned.

Makoto fell silent.

Inside him, a raw nerve twisted and splintered for the last time.


	55. EPISODE 10: Disparate Heart Rate! - Part 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Having exhausted all meaningful conversation about Rin, the swim club decided to adjourn their secret counsel for the present. With Haru’s lead, they left the lush green boulders of the beach one by one, heading up the carved steps of the hillside and back onto the main road, where Rei and Nagisa realized they had to make haste to the station if they wanted to catch their evening train.

“Good night, Haru-chan, Mako-chan!” cried Nagisa as he hurried off with a wave of his hand.

“See you tomorrow, Haruka-senpai, Makoto-san!” parted Rei, running after Nagisa.

“Night,” Haru called out to them, Makoto waving in silence until the others disappeared down the path. His hand dropped immediately after, clenching by his side.

It was just the two of them now. Far away, he could hear the chirp of a lonely cricket welcoming the night.

“Makoto,” he heard Haru say.

He turned his head. Haru nodded to the road leading home.

“Let’s go,” he said quietly. Makoto hummed.

* * *

On the way, each was quiet, though they now walked side by side undisturbed, Haru struggling to keep up with Makoto’s naturally long strides. Squirming under the weight of their strange silence, Haru glanced over to Makoto by the minute, but for all the notice he received, he might as well have been invisible. Makoto seemed deep in thought, even troubled, judging from the crease of his brow and the hard relief of his cheekbones as he clenched his jaws firmly together.

Try as Haru might in his own limited ways, he could not induce Makoto to abandon his thoughts, or divert his attention to the boy beside him. A few times, Haru even broke rhythm to let himself collide with the other, his shoulder digging into Makoto’s arm first gently, then with more force as they headed uphill, but his friend merely pulled away from him, perceiving Haruka’s attempts as no more than a request to give him room.

Haru bit his lip. Was Makoto angry with him…?

“Makoto…”

Haru’s voice barely rose above a whisper, but finally accomplished what a dozen maneuvers could not. Makoto flinched out of his thoughts, and though he did not stop walking, he now turned his head to look at Haruka, his expression somber with fatigue and guilt. Haru quirked his brow, his own features tense as a vague sense of fear crept over him.

“Are you upset?” he asked, his gaze fixed on Makoto. The other sighed, his eyes falling to the ground as his shoulders arched defensively.

“I’m…”

Makoto paused. Haru waited with his breath held. Makoto averted his eyes.

“I’m thinking about Rin.”

Haru let his breath out in a huff, squinting indignantly at Makoto. Was thinking about Rin any reason for Makoto to snub him so openly, when they had this twenty-minute walk all to themselves and the stars above? Had what happened years ago really made such an impression that sensible, practical Makoto chose to dwell on it when nothing could be done about it anymore?

“There’s no point in thinking about that,” said Haru in a calm, even tone, as if to convince himself as well. “It’s in the past. You can’t change it, so you just have to accept it.”

“The past tends to affect the present, Haru,” came Makoto’s reply, spoken without any passion or desire to persuade. Haru let out another poignant huff.

“It’s not _your_ past,” he said, his eyes narrowed again as he turned his gaze to the stone stairs looming ahead. “It has nothing to do with you, so you don’t have to get involved.”

Makoto stopped in his tracks, eyes growing wide one moment and shrinking to pained slits in the next. He turned to Haru with a look almost savage.

“Do you really believe that?” he asked, his voice swelling in the dead of night. “Do you seriously believe that this affects nobody except you? What about those who love you, those who care about you? Do you really think they can just stand there and do or feel _nothing?_ ”

Haru twitched to a halt and whipped his head back, staring at Makoto bewildered. Makoto tensed. His adam’s apple bobbed sharply in his throat.

“I’m sorry…” he mumbled, head lowered and eyes dropped in searing shame. “I said something foolish. Forgive me.”

With that, Makoto stepped forward, willing himself into hurrying past a confused Haruka and up the steps to his house, allowing himself no more than a glance as he pushed the gate open.

“Good night, Haru,” he whispered as he slipped through the gate, closing it with a sharp thud. He then rushed to the front door, which slid open and slammed shut in the same desperate haste. By the time Haru reached the top of the steps, Makoto was gone, and all he could do was peer over the gate, eyes flitting from the door to the grave of the goldfish that Makoto didn’t even spare a glance on his way inside.

Feeling prompted to honor the dead, Haru remained by the gate a moment longer, his hands pressed together in prayer, but his reverent gesture brought no Makoto. All that came was a gust of evening wind that brushed coolly against his neck until it forced him to retreat, his eyes on Makoto’s window every step of the way up the stone stairs and to his own front door. No light flickered upstairs, as though Makoto were trying to hide from him. Haru sighed as he entered his house.

He climbed the stairs and soon threw himself down on the bed, arms tucked under his head and his lips pursed into a pout at the ceiling. Why did the past affect Makoto so much? And what was he trying to say before he ran away? Haru wasn’t sure, or rather did not permit himself to read anything into those unhappy words beyond a general sentiment. To suppose that Makoto might have meant no one but himself, Haruka would have had to allow the possibility that Makoto… _that he…_

 ** _No._** If the past four years had taught Haru anything, it was that he always supposed more affinity and attachment in others than there could ever be for someone like him. Makoto was simply confused and lost somehow, too sensitive for his own good, and all Haru could do was watch over him until the whole ordeal blew over one way or another.

Resolving to do just that starting tomorrow, Haru undressed, then pulled on his pajamas, tucking himself away for the night. He fell asleep soon enough, unaware that opposite him in that unlit upstairs bedroom, Makoto lay on his bed wide awake, his own resolve just as firm, but revolving around something else entirely.

* * *

The next morning, Haru got up earlier than usual, took a bath, then rushed his breakfast to make sure he got ready before Makoto could reasonably leave his house. He tugged on his school uniform, pausing as he realized how he would wear it for the last time that summer, then hurried out of the house and down the stone stairs, checking his watch to make sure it was well before they had to depart for the closing ceremony. His friend was nowhere to be seen yet, so Haru plopped down contentedly on the bottom step, soon joined by the white kitten that had grown a little since he last saw it. Haru plucked a piece of tall grass from a clump growing in the cracks of the concrete, then held it out for the kitten, swishing it left and right to amuse his small companion while he waited for Makoto.

Just as Haru was growing tired of obliging the kitten, Makoto finally appeared by the gate, but while his uniform looked immaculate, Haru felt something out of place, something wanting about Makoto beyond his usual good humor.

“Good morning, Haru,” said Makoto as he descended.

By the time he reached the path, Haru finally realized what was off about him.

“Makoto,” he called out, tossing the grass away. The kitten pounced after it. “Your duffel bag.”

Makoto twitched. Haru straightened, lifting a cautious finger to point at the other’s shoulder.

“You forgot your duffel bag,” he repeated, his tone a little worried. Was Makoto really so upset about yesterday that he was starting to grow absentminded? Haru wasn’t sure. Even stuck in that miserable hell of learning how to swim in the element he had feared and despised, Makoto never forgot to bring his bag, or lunch, or anything else crucial for his obligations. How could any worries about the past be worse than _that?_

Makoto himself merely stared at him in silence, then feigned laughter, as though Haru’s words were a joke whose punch line was slow to reach him.

“Ah. You’re right, Haru,” he said in a strained tone, his eyes avoiding Haruka’s, who nonetheless cracked a smile at his own perceptiveness. _There._ He was good at this. All he had to do was pay attention to Makoto, and things would be fine.

“Go get it. I’ll wait,” said Haru with a nod at the gate, sinking back down on the stone stairs to reassure Makoto he would not leave without his friend. Makoto tensed.

“Okay. One second,” he replied, and hardly knowing why he thought Haru wouldn’t notice he had deliberately left his duffel bag at home, Makoto climbed up the steps again to fetch it from his room.

* * *

Once Makoto reemerged, he and Haruka walked to school together, but when Makoto proved just as taciturn as yesterday, and the silence equally uncomfortable, it was Haru who found himself talking in the hopes of distracting Makoto from his thoughts, albeit in small bursts, and acknowledged by little more than a hum or nod of the head. Haruka risked some observation of the weather, and Makoto concurred. Haru noted that summer vacation would officially begin with the end of the closing ceremony, and Makoto allowed himself a short reply not to discourage him. Harboring such dark objectives as he did, Makoto nonetheless did his best to observe his one guiding principle: that no endeavor of his should ever hurt Haruka if Makoto could help it. He would be causing his friend some inconvenience soon, Makoto was well aware of that. What he was planning to do would undoubtedly be met with disapproval or anger on all sides, but he was determined to cause as little pain to Haruka as possible.

And so he let his best friend talk, listened to him as attentively as a torn mind could reasonably do, and at the closing ceremony, they stood together with their duffel bags at their feet, having arrived just in the nick of time to attend. They received an honorary mention from the principle as the new club that had managed to advance to the regional tournament held next week, causing some of the girls nearby to turn to Makoto, but he no longer felt any embarrassment over the unwanted attention. Much like Monday afternoon, all he wanted to do was run, run, _run._

* * *

The ceremony ended some twenty minutes before ten, allowing each party plenty of time to do as they pleased before practice. Kou let herself be pulled away by Hana-chan and two other girls, who had taken keen interest in the swim club. Rei and Nagisa walked off with some of their classmates to enjoy their rising popularity, brought on by the successful relay and Rei’s placement in butterfly. Even Haru and Makoto were flagged by their fellow second-years as the student body dispersed around them, to wish them good luck with regionals. Makoto was glad such a handy excuse to linger had come his way, but Haru seemed adamant they should not separate so easily. When the second-years relayed their good wishes, Haru merely shrugged his shoulders, then turned to Makoto, even lifting a hand to point towards the pool in the distance.

“Let’s go, Makoto,” he said quietly. Makoto hesitated.

“You go ahead, Haru,” he replied, trying for an encouraging smile as he nodded towards his classmates. Nonetheless, he failed to beguile Haruka, who tensed as a flash of realization shot through him.

“No. You come too,” he said stiffly, his eyes narrowed in suspicion. Makoto suppressed a sigh.

“We have to go now,” he told the others apologetically, then stepped over to Haruka to join his side.

“Practice hard, Tachibana, Nanase!” he heard someone say behind him as the two of them headed towards one of the gates in the chain link fence, the one that would bring them closest to the path leading to the pool.

They passed the gate. It was now or never. Makoto stopped, and a step later, so did Haru.

A few seconds passed as Haru steeled himself, then turned back to face Makoto, his heart lodged in his throat. Makoto’s chest rose dramatically as he too braced himself for the inevitable.

A few more seconds passed. The world fell into silence.

“You don’t want to come to practice, do you,” spoke Haruka, his voice calmer than those large, frightened eyes peering at Makoto, who lowered his gaze as he shrugged his shoulders.

“What tipped you off, Haru?” he asked in a weak attempt at humor. Haru arched his head.

“Your smile,” he said quietly.

Makoto laughed, feeling naked and paper-thin under those dark blue eyes.

“In the end, you saw right through me,” he replied with another one of those sad, lopsided smiles Haru would have been given anything never to see again. Makoto lifted his head, his features softened in melancholy. “Please go ahead without me, Haru. I’ll come to practice tomorrow, I swear.”

“Where are you going?” asked Haruka at once, his tone teetering on edge. Makoto’s shoulders shrank in discomfort.

“I’ll tell you later,” he turned away from Haruka.

“ _Makoto!_ ”

Makoto twitched to a stop. Haru stepped closer, hesitating only for a second.

“No more secrets,” he whispered, his cheeks flushed at his own nerve. “Remember?”

Makoto hung his head, his lips stretching into a sickly frown.

“Alright, Haru,” he said in defeat, though he refused to turn back or look at the other. “I’m going to Samezuka Academy to see Rin.”

Haruka paled, his heart jolting in alarm. Makoto, throwing away his obligations for Rin? Was he really so upset, so implacable that he was willing to leave Haru behind, to travel an hour by train to see someone he didn’t even know? _I knew it,_ thought Haru, his heart pounding, _I knew something was wrong, very wrong…_

“ _Why?_ ” he implored as he stepped even closer, instinctively lifting a hand that hovered just inches from Makoto’s arm while Haru racked his mind, searching for a reason, any reason at all as to why Makoto would go and see—

_Aaah, haha, you should have seen Mako-chan..! He wanted to go after Rin-chan and beat him up for being so mean…!_

Haru’s heart skipped a beat at the echo of those words, so etched into his memory by the surreal image they had painted in his mind. Makoto careened his head away, taking a shaky breath to compose himself.

“Please, Haru, I’ve got to—”

“Are you going to beat him up?” blurted Haruka. Makoto froze.

“ _What..?_ ” he mumbled, voice threadbare and eyes wide in shock as he turned back to stare at Haruka. Haru colored.

“Nagisa told me you wanted to beat up Rin at prefecturals..” he muttered self-consciously, lowering his eyes as though he had just exposed himself for a fraud, who could talk to Nagisa at the tournament, yet ignored his best friend in his hour of need. Nevertheless, as much as Haru feared reproof on that score, no reproach or mean words came his way. In his attempt to make sense of Makoto’s motives and connect the pieces of a scattered puzzle, he inadvertently stabbed where it hurt the most, taking Makoto’s breath away.

Silence fell between them. Makoto’s face contorted in pain.

“No,” he breathed, his voice strained, “I’m just going to _talk_ to him. _Talk,_ Haru.”

He paused. His hands clenched helplessly as he shook his head.

“I’ve got to go.”

He turned away again, managing two steps before Haru sprung after him to seize his wrist.

“ _Don’t go!_ ” he cried with a hard squeeze of Makoto’s wrist. As the other turned towards him again, Haru instinctively reeled at the warning of a memory, of Rin shoving his fist backwards and nearly hitting him in his attempt to break free, but his hand stayed. “You can’t go!”

“Why not, Haru?” asked Makoto, his voice too low, too hollow. Haru’s chest tightened.

“Because… because you have practice,” he pleaded, his mind drawing pathetic blanks over useful arguments. “Because.. I’m the captain, and you have to do what I say. It won’t do any good to see Rin, so don’t go.”

“I’m sorry, Haru,” sighed Makoto, “but I have to.”

“ _Don’t!_ ” snapped Haruka, gripping him harder in desperation. “I’m begging you not to go! Why don’t you ever listen to me?!”

Makoto’s lips twitched into a dark smile that made Haru’s skin crawl.

“Because that’s just who I am, Haru,” he said, his eyes glassy above that broken smile. “I’m a stupid, selfish, aggressive jerk who beats people up all the time.”

Haru’s chest ran cold as his mind raced back to that poolside conversation, to Makoto huddled into a ball as he spoke of how useless and worthless he felt…

“Don’t say that,” whispered Haruka, his hand trembling over Makoto’s wrist. “You’re nothing like that…”

“Then why would you ask me if I wanted to beat up Rin?” demanded Makoto, his eyes gleaming. “Why would you say that unless you thought me capable of doing such a thing? Is that really how all of you see me? Am I really so _horrible_ , Haru..?”

Haruka’s breath turned shallow, as if those words had sealed him in a vacuum. He tried to think of a way to repair the terrible blunder, but the words slipped through his fingers like sand. Why did he even have to say that? _Damn it, Nagisa…!_

“I take it back,” he blurted as a last refuge, no longer caring how childish he sounded. “I take it back, _so don’t go._ ”

Makoto turned his head away. Haru clenched his jaw.

“Talk to me instead. I’ll tell you _everything!_ ” he cried, tugging at Makoto’s arm. “I’ll tell you why I wore the pink swimsuit that one time. I’ll tell you whatever you want about Rin!”

Makoto turned back again to raise his free hand towards Haruka’s, who flinched despite himself, but didn’t draw back. Makoto stood very still, their eyes meeting for a split second as his fingers slipped ever so gingerly onto Haruka’s. One by one, he coaxed Haru’s fingers off his wrist, more by the warmth and tenderness of his touch than by any roughness or force that large hand could have been capable of. Haru could merely watch, his fingers going limp in Makoto’s gentle hold, and his heart hammering as Makoto pressed them lightly.

“Only Rin can tell me what I want to know,” he said quietly, letting Haru’s fingers slip from his hand as he stepped forward. “Please go to practice, Haru. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

And with that, Makoto walked off towards the main gate, his duffel bag dangling from his shoulder like dead weight. Haru paled.

For one long moment, he remained where Makoto left him, staring after his friend in fear… then slowly his hands curled into fists, nails digging into his palm in defiance. He took a step forward, then another, letting his rebellion carry him after Makoto. He cared little whether the other would notice or not. Haru never agreed to go to practice, after all. Not without Makoto.

Makoto, on the other hand, did glance back briefly, as subtly as he could careen his neck midstride, and the moment he saw Haru advance in the distance, his stomach churned in agony.

 _I didn’t want to do this, Haru,_ he thought to himself, but regret was as useless as the duffel bag bouncing against his back with every step.

It all happened in a matter of seconds. Makoto arched his head forward, pulling his duffel bag under his right arm. Haru continued to advance. Makoto’s rhythm seemed to shift into a more dynamic pace… and he broke into jog, then a desperate power sprint all in the blink of an eye, the change so drastic it stunned Haru into wasting precious seconds in his pursuit. A moment later, he gave chase as fast as his legs could carry him, but he was no match for a former athlete who had been holding back for his sake and could restrain himself no longer. By the time Haru scrambled to the main gate, lungs screaming and mouth dry, Makoto had disappeared from sight, as if he had never come to school at all.

Haru doubled over by the gate, hands propped against his knees as he lifted his head by degrees, staring into the distance that had swallowed Makoto. He gasped for air in large gulps, struggling to remember the breathing exercises Makoto had taught him, then putting them to use until the burn of his lungs subsided, but even as Haru regained his breath, his wretched state of mind admitted no relief. Cold anger lapped at his heart, scorching where its icy tongue reached until Haru shoved his duffel bag onto the curb in front of the gate, trembling as he threw himself down and wrapped his arms around his knees like an aching, petulant child.

He told himself Makoto would regret his decision in a moment, that his guilt would get the best of him and he would come back to apologize any second now, and so Haru would wait for him, he would wait right there because his legs had turned into jelly, his head feeling so heavy with grief he wished it would just fall off his neck and roll away from him.

* * *

How long Haruka sat there, he didn’t know. The more he idled on the curb in stubborn wait, the more the seconds blurred together, marred beyond recognition until individual moments became a string of continuous turmoil inside him. Jealousy and resentment tumbled in Haruka’s heart, feeling just as forsaken as he had that one afternoon during winter break, except this was somehow worse, all the worse for the very fact that Makoto didn’t hurt him. He never said he would quit swimming. He didn’t yell, he didn’t shove. He even promised to come to practice tomorrow… except tomorrow wasn’t good enough, and no gentleness or soothing words from Makoto could hope to fill the gap he had left in today. His disturbing absence anchored Haru to the sidewalk, too hurt and too proud to move, and had it not been for Kou’s impeccable timing, Haru might have missed practice altogether. It was her voice, not Makoto’s, that finally startled him into lifting his head, and at that moment, he knew Makoto wasn’t coming back to apologize. _Not today._

“Haruka-senpai..?” he heard Kou say behind him, having just walked Chigusa to the gate to say goodbye to her until they would meet again next week. Haru turned his head. The girls stood a few feet away, staring at him like he was some freakish curiosity. Haru glared at them pointedly, then whipped his head back to the road. Chigusa blinked at his unexpected hostility, but a moment later, she flashed a sheepish smile at Kou.

“I think I’ll go home now,” she said with an apologetic look, nodding to Haruka. Kou acknowledged her request with a hum. “I’ll see you later.”

“Alright, bye, Hana-chan!” replied Kou with a wave as Chigusa hurried off, waiting until her friend was gone to approach Haru. She stopped by his side. He didn’t even look up.

“Haruka-senpai, what’s wrong?” she said as she leaned down to him, placing a careful hand on his shoulder. “I thought you’d be at the pool by now with Makoto-senpai.”

Haru clenched his jaw. He pushed himself to his feet to escape Kou’s hand, then grabbed his duffel bag, dragging it over his shoulder.

“Makoto’s not coming,” he said between his teeth as he turned towards the gate, hands tightened and shoulders stiff.

“ _Eh?!_ Why not?!” cried Kou.

“Because he never, ever listens,” muttered Haruka, storming off to the pool area with a bewildered Kou in tow, whose cries of _Haruka-senpai! What do you mean? Haruka-senpai, wait up!_ were ignored every step of the way.

* * *

The moment they arrived, Haru threw down his duffel bag in the club room, then tugged off his summer uniform to free his jammers from confinement. Within a minute, he left the club room and dove into the pool for a warm-up lap, and since Makoto was still nowhere to be seen, Kou finally told Coach Sasabe that their backstroke swimmer went missing in action.

“What?! Makoto’s not practicing?!” growled Sasabe. Rei and Nagisa looked to each other surprised.

“That’s unusual,” said Rei, cupping his chin in thought. “Makoto-san has never missed practice before, and certainly never left us without a reason or notice, either…”

“But wasn’t Mako-chan at the closing ceremony?” asked Nagisa, turning to Kou for confirmation. “I thought I saw him standing next to Haru-chan.”

“I saw him, too,” agreed Kou.

“Did Haru-chan say where he went?” asked Nagisa next.

“No, he didn’t,” replied Kou, having not yet cracked Haru’s riddle of _Because he never, ever listens_ to her satisfaction. It sounded like Makoto didn’t heed Haruka’s words, and Haru did look irate when she had found him, so did that mean they had a fight? Who could truly tell when Haruka never cared to explain himself and Makoto wasn’t there to do the talking for him?

“Could it have been sickness, a sudden indigestion, perhaps?” hazarded Rei, his eyes wandering to Sasabe, who mistook his meaning and scoffed loudly.

“There was nothing in that hot pot that could have made him sick!” he groused, evidently offended by the implication. “You all ate it and you’re alright, so don’t look at me!”

“I didn’t mean to imply anything of the sort!” cried Rei with a frantic wave of his hands. Behind their backs, Haru finally hoisted himself out of the pool, unable to help but think that Makoto should have been there to offer his hand.

“But if Mako-chan did eat something spoiled…” mused Nagisa. Kou’s eyes flashed.

“ _Mackerel?_ ” she turned to Haru with a glare, having found a likely explanation for Makoto’s disappearance. Haru turned his head.

“I didn’t give him anything,” he replied with a defensive shrug.

“So for all we know, he just ran off and skipped practice,” groaned Sasabe. “Ah, man... And here I thought he was more reliable. What is that guy thinking when he needs this more than any of you,” he said with a shake of his head that spoke of his utmost disapproval. Haru bit his lip, a spark of protectiveness flaring in his heart.

“He’s reliable,” he replied, his eyes carefully averted. “He’s just not feeling well.”

“Oh well,” sighed Sasabe. “There isn’t much time left before regionals, so you just need to practice without him this time. I’ll be your backstroke swimmer while Makoto’s gone, so warm up and we’ll start practicing your exchanges!”

“Alright,” replied Rei, turning to the captain. “Haruka-senpai? Shall we begin?”

Haru hummed, his eyes flitting to the water. _Makoto must be on the train to Samezuka by now,_ and all Haru could do was hope that Makoto would come back unscathed. Meeting Rin seemed to bring nothing but arguments and pain these days, and of all people, Haru wanted Makoto spared of it, only to fail his friend in the most spectacular way possible.

* * *

Makoto was indeed on his way to Samezuka Academy, where relay practice had already begun. In lane four, Rin was milling his arms furiously in his final stretch of backstroke, touching the wall with a slam of his hand so the next swimmer could go. His teammate dove into the water, leaving Rin heaving below the block, where he tugged his cap and goggles off in one fluid motion, whipping up foam as his fist crashed down on the water. He didn’t even need to ask Nitori for his time. His innate stopwatch told Rin he was far behind his current personal best, and if that weren’t enough cause for discontent, his rusty form was another source of anxiety and vexation.

“Damn it!” he spat, glaring at the water. Above him, Aiichiro’s lips curled into a sad frown, but he caught himself a second later, forcing a brave smile for his senpai’s sake. Even if his unwavering support was not what Matsuoka-senpai needed to regain his former cheerfulness ( _How long did it even last? A day? A few hours at best..?_ ), Aiichiro would never be caught guilty of depriving his idol in any respect. Knowing that Rin would soon get out of the pool, Aiichiro even draped a towel over his arm for the other to take, waiting as he waded from the block to a stretch of unobstructed wall on the side.

“Matsuoka-senpai, you’re doing great!” Aiichiro told Rin as his senior pulled himself upward, stepping out of the pool. “We’ll easily beat Nanase-san and his team—” Aiichiro carried on, but Rin didn’t so much as throw a look his way. He simply reached out, pulled the towel off Nitori’s arm, then walked past him in bitter silence, his shoulders slumping in apathy.

“Senpai…” whispered Aiichiro. Behind him, Captain Mikoshiba shot Rin a look, then turned his head the other way, lifting a finger beckoningly towards a cluster of swimmers by that side of the pool. One by one, each raised a hand in query, waiting for Mikoshiba to shake his head in dismissal or nod in agreement. After a few rounds, they found his chosen target was Azuma Yuuki, the former backstroke swimmer of the relay team, who left the others to hurry over to his superior.

“Yes, Captain?” he asked as he stepped in front of Mikoshiba, shoulders straight and hands tucked behind his back. Seijuurou waved his dismissively.

“At ease,” he muttered. Azuma’s posture relaxed on command. “What are you training for right now?”

“The two-hundred meter backstroke,” replied Azuma, having reshuffled his events once he was discharged from the relay team. Mikoshiba nodded.

“Practice for the one-hundred, too,” he told Azuma, his voice carefully lowered. “I want you on standby for the relay team just in case.”

“You don’t mean—” blurted Azuma, shooting a glance towards Rin’s figure in the distance. Seijuurou nodded.

“Not a word of this to anyone,” he added in a stern tone. “As far as I’m concerned, Matsuoka’s on probation right now. If he proves capable of working together with his teammates in the next few days, he stays on the relay team. If he fails…”

“I understand. I’ll keep quiet,” replied Azuma. Mikoshiba nodded again.

“Good man. Go back and practice,” he replied.

Once Azuma walked away, Seijuurou stole a glance at Nitori, wondering how the poor boy had yet to grow tired of the anti-social roommate that showed no regard for his fellow students, let alone his fellow teammates, who had no choice but to rely on him if they wanted to stand a chance of dethroning the Iwatobi Swim Club.

* * *

Having left the indoor pool, Rin sank down on one of the benches in the hallway, pressing his back against the wall as he waited to dry just enough so he could get dressed and leave for the dorm. The towel he had nicked from Nitori now hung from his head like a thick veil, shielding him from prying glances on either side. He was in no mood to give consequence to anyone, Nitori included, his thoughts whirling obsessively around the upcoming relay and his own form, which somehow felt lacking with every day’s practice.

Front crawl or backstroke, it _doesn’t matter. I’ll be the fastest either way._ That’s what he told Mikoshiba, and in the heat of the moment, Rin fully believed himself capable of delivering that promise, but the more he fixated on the upcoming race, the less he performed on par with his own expectations.

It shouldn’t have been so hard, Rin told himself. He was to race a bunch of losers, so what was his difficulty? There was Haru, whom he had officially surpassed, and was certain of beating again and again if he just kept training. Rei, who had reached his prime, but could surely be dealt with by Samezuka’s finest. Nagisa, the wild card, no more than a bag of last-minute tricks… and lastly, the green cuckoo, who could not have been swimming long if he couldn’t even do a proper dive in May, then got himself disqualified in the one-hundred meter at prefecturals. The impostor’s unprecedented lead in the relay could in no way have been anything but a hoax, yet Rin continued to dwell on him with growing trepidation, burning with hatred each time some vague memory flickered across his mind and got caught in his web of obsession, sticking there as stubbornly as Rin pursued his opponent from the safety of Samezuka Academy. He could already feel himself unhinge little by little, stroke by desperate stroke in his attempts to prove superior, and had their schools been no more than a short walk’s distance away, Rin might have let his vicious urges get the better of him. Each time he thought of how much Haru distinguished that talentless hack with his attention, with what appeared to Rin genuine concern, even affection that he had once thought Haru incapable of, he immersed himself in avid fantasies of finally knocking the cuckoo out of the nest he had chosen to infest. The price of a return train ticket would have been too costly, and an hour’s travel more attention than the guy deserved, but if fate just brought him close enough, Rin would have gladly shown him the wrath of Samezuka Academy.

These were the thoughts that occupied his mind, and these were the thoughts that were disturbed by a fellow swimmer walking up to him in the hall.

“Matsuoka…” he called out, waiting for Rin to turn his head. “Someone named Tachibana is here for you. He’s waiting outside.”

Rin twitched upright in his seat, his eyes widening in shock.

 _No, it couldn’t be… He can’t be that stupid, it has to be someone else,_ thought Rin, yet he pushed himself away from the bench at once, running into the locker room to get dressed. He must have misheard, Nitori was just messing with him and the guy’s name was Takahashi after all, the prefectural tournament brochure was a misprint, and everyone was a damn liar, but whoever the visitor turned out to be, Rin did not want to face them in nothing but a legskin with transparent patches by the inner thighs.

His Samezuka tracksuit jacket lay on top of his clothes in the locker, so he pulled it on without a single glance at the shirt that should have gone beneath it. He then grabbed his track pants and put on his shoes, checking himself in the mirror before slamming the door of the locker shut. _Not perfect_ , he concluded, but it would just have to do while he stepped outside to deal with his visitor.

Ready to go, Rin hurried back into the hallway again. He only slowed down towards the exit, giving his jacket a final tug as he stepped outside to face the unknown.

The front area was empty. No one awaited him there, but just beyond his vision, something stirred further to the left. Rin followed the itch in the corner of his eye, his brow furrowed in anticipation. By the left wall lay a duffel bag on the ground, white and blue like the tracksuits they had worn at the tournament. Above it loomed the green cuckoo in his Iwatobi High School uniform with its dumb dotted tie. He lifted his head as he stepped away from his bag.

“Rin,” he spoke, his tone calm enough, but his head arched forward like a ram ready to charge. Rin choked as bile rose and sank back down his throat at the sound of his name.

“ _You…_ ” he hissed, his shoulders hunched at the sight of the other’s larger, heavier form. Nagisa and Haru were both shorter and smaller than Rin, for which he was glad, while Rei had grown to his exact height and size, which Rin could tolerate as long as they stood on equal ground. In contrast, the cuckoo was obscenely tall, and built to match. Despite those droopy eyes and slanted eyebrows, he could look formidable if the mood struck him so, and today the mood had apparently struck him to look nothing short of menacing.

“I want to talk to you,” said Tachibana.

Rin glared back at him, refusing to show gladness or fear at the other’s sudden appearance. All that mattered was that the guy was here at last. He entered Samezuka ground of his own accord, and right now, stronger or not, he was no more than a piece of meat in a tank full of hungry sharks.

 

**_TO BE CONTINUED…_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 


	56. EPISODE 11: Desperate All-out! - Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As much as the thought of having to escape from his best friend pained Makoto, the act itself was nowhere near as difficult as the long, arduous path leading to the convictions that spurred it. The moment Makoto surrendered to the urge and started running as fast as his legs could go, something inside his chest shattered in a burst of relief, cutting his thoughts down where they stood. The field of his mind lay completely barren in its wake. Not even an inkling could take root while Makoto continued to sprint full force, letting his instincts guide him down the streets to Iwatobi Station. His eyes gazed blindly into the distance, feet thundering on the pavement with every step, but Makoto only felt the wind in his face and the furious hum of his heart. Every ounce of him teemed with energy, as alive as that night at Hachiman-sama’s Festival, in those precious, fleeting moments he spent with Haru at the shrine’s lookout point. Rin’s shadow draped over the two of them even then, hanging dimly from the lanterns and looming from the corners, yet Makoto now looked back upon that evening as a happier, simpler time in his life, a time when he could still believe he was more to Haru (and the swim club) than a cheap substitute for Matsuoka Rin.

He continued to mourn the loss of those innocent hopes as he rushed to the ticket window, heaved out his request for a return ticket, then finally collapsed into a seat on the train, the summer uniform clinging to his back and his face gleaming with sweat. Makoto lifted a hand to wipe his forehead. Yellow wisps swam lazily before his eyes, then disappeared one by one, leaving his vision dull and colorless.

 _You brought this on yourself_ , he thought bitterly. Had he not signed up to be just that, no more than filler to meet Haru’s quota so his friends could finally swim with him? Had he not confessed so himself to Haru by the poolside ages ago, back when… _when everyone thought I was a monster._ The idea stabbed Makoto like a dagger to the throat, but when he thought of how little things had changed after all, the dagger plunged deeper still, twisting like a rusty drill. Even after he had confessed, then dedicated himself to the swim club with greater willingness, his every move still got filtered through that same impression of him as volatile and violent… but perhaps the idea would not have pained Makoto half so much, had it not been for the fact that Matsuoka Rin bore no such stigma. It felt as though his friends’ sense of reality had been permanently warped by nostalgia, until all they could see was a happily grinning child instead of the cruel, morose adolescent Rin had become after years of studying abroad. What happened to him in Australia? How could he alter so much that he could no longer meet his former teammates without incidents, leaving them confused, disturbed, even heart-broken every single time? And more importantly, why did everyone, absolutely everyone think the current Rin so desirable as to chase after him like a coveted prize, while constantly reminding Makoto of the seat he had unwittingly occupied?

So many question marks, so many answers Makoto wanted to hear straight from the source. Well, now he would be satisfied at last. Adamant as Haru seemed that he should not seek the truth, Makoto could no longer wait, or bear to hear the others talk so enthusiastically of Rin. With every passing minute in such company, the lack Makoto attempted to fill threatened to swallow him whole.

Driven to such extremes, he thought himself as justified as anyone in his position could well be, yet the words, _Are you going to beat him up?_ continued to scratch at his throat… yet even now, utterly disgusted with himself in his dank shirt and bunched up trousers as he huddled in his seat like some cornered animal, Makoto could not find it in his heart to fault Haruka. His words merely echoed Nagisa’s, Nagisa planted those seeds of worry in Haru’s heart, but Makoto could no more blame Nagisa than he could his best friend. In Makoto’s experience, first impressions were almost always set in stone, and having seen him at his worst, the others had little choice but to keep Makoto at arm’s length. After all, none of them had known him growing up. How could they be aware that Makoto never raised a hand to strike in his entire life, not even to defend himself..?

Unable to clear his slate just yet, all Makoto could do was trust the justness of his actions while keeping his confrontation polite and professional just as he had planned to, long before those words of doubt splattered over him and tarnished his pure intentions. He would meet Rin, ask him questions to determine his motives, and if he found Rin dangerous, Makoto would issue him a simple warning. Though part of him feared his every action would inevitably be seen as the work of a monster, the perverse wantonness of that stupid, selfish, aggressive jerk everyone thought him to be, another part, more in tune with Makoto’s hopeful nature, kept telling him that if others did not perceive him as the person Makoto believed he was, then all he had to do was do better, be better, bend himself a thousand times more to the will and expectations of his friends, and he would eventually have his reward. Forgiveness… even love.

Camaraderie.

Friendship.

Companionship.

A hand to hold whenever the world was cold.

* * *

Such hopes fueled Makoto’s convictions for the rest of his train ride, then brought him at a less desperate pace to Samezuka Academy, where he slowed his steps even more not to draw unwanted attention to himself as he searched his memories for the path to the indoor pool. He found it soon enough and stepped inside, waiting for his uniform to alert the residents of the hallway to the arrival of a stranger.

Within seconds, a student walked over to him, having just finished dressing up.

“Are you looking for someone?” he asked. Makoto bowed his head in greeting.

“Yes. I’m Tachibana Makoto, Iwatobi Swim Club. Is Matsuoka Rin here?”

The other boy paused, brow furrowed, then dropped his frown in recollection.

“He’s inside, practicing,” he replied, pointing a finger in the pool’s direction. Makoto hummed.

“Could you please tell him to meet me outside?” said Makoto next. The student paused.

“Alright,” he shrugged, heading down the hall so he could flag a swimmer to relay the gist of the message while Makoto stepped outside again, setting his duffel bag down by the wall. He took deep breaths to steady himself. He did it. He had let his presence be known, and unless he could satisfy himself with being seen as a coward in Rin’s eyes, there was no turning back for him now.

* * *

_I want to talk to you._

The words still hung in the air, suspended between them on the hooks of an oppressive silence, as though Tachibana were waiting for Rin’s approval of a request that seemed offensively ridiculous. What was the guy hoping for, calling him out openly on Samezuka grounds for the entire swim team to see, when he should have been aware, was probably aware that any act of aggression or violence that could damage their school’s reputation might result in their dismissal? Yet here he was, issuing a covert challenge, while all Rin could do was swallow his bile and bear the trial with patience, glaring at Tachibana as the other straightened his shoulders just a little more.

“Well, go on then,” spoke Rin, his voice hoarse from the effort to contain himself. “What do you want?”

The other drew a sharp breath through his nose.

“There are some things I want to ask you.”

Rin scoffed, more surprised than upset at the answer. _An hour’s train ride, for this…?_

“You came all the way out here to ask questions?” he replied, feigning nonchalance at the absurdity of the situation, a once uneventful Friday morning slowly turning into a standoff. “Don’t you have a whole team you can harass?”

Tachibana winced visibly at the last word, but regained his composure just as quickly.

“Only you can tell me what I want to know.”

“Fine,” said Rin, his brow furrowed in anticipation. “Ask me, then.”

Another sharp breath.

“First of all, why did you decide to enter the relay?”

A strangled sound escaped Rin’s throat before he could bite it back.

“I changed my mind, that’s all,” he replied, his voice as rusted as his excuse felt full of holes, ready to fall apart at the lightest prying. “Did you seriously come out here to ask me that?”

“I don’t believe you,” said Tachibana, his eyes narrowed. “You’ve obviously been stalking Haru for some time now. I know that back when you were both in your first year of middle school, you came back from Australia during winter break and challenged Haru to a race. You lost.”

The words rang heavily in the air, flung in Rin’s face like small ghosts of the past. Unable to chase them away just yet, Rin clenched his jaw firmly shut.

“It obviously upset you,” continued Tachibana, as though their history had no weight to him. “You even told Haru you would never swim again because of it. And then you suddenly reappeared after three years, and I don’t know when you did it, but sometime before we arrived at the island for our training camp, you forced Haru into promising he would race you at prefecturals.”

Rin’s neck shrank back subconsciously, his fingers curling into loose fists by his sides.

“Haru made that promise to you thinking it would settle everything,” said Tachibana. “That if he agreed to race you, which he did, you would both accept the outcome and move on. That obviously didn’t happen, so here’s another question. What did you say to Haru after he lost at prefecturals?”

“ _Huh?_ ” blurted Rin, his face contorting in confusion. Tachibana arched his head forward.

“After you won, you moved over to Haru’s lane and stood over him for a while, and when you left, he just remained where he was and didn’t move until the organizers made him leave,” explained Tachibana with blood-boiling patience. “He then stayed away from us for the rest of the day, refusing to come anywhere near us. You said something to him, I know you did, so what did you say?”

“That’s between me and Haru, so what do _you_ care?” replied Rin.

“ _Answer me,_ ” pressed Tachibana, his eyes flashing. “You’re not a child anymore, so own up to your actions like an adult and tell me, what did you say to Haru after you won?”

Rin pursed his lips in defiance. Tachibana quirked an eyebrow.

“Are you embarrassed to tell me what you said? Do you regret it, Rin?” he said quietly. Rin’s hands tightened, his cheeks growing uncomfortably hot.

“I told him I won, so I would never swim with him again,” he hissed. Tachibana merely glared at him like the truth did not surprise him in the slightest. Rin gritted his teeth.

“And he deserved it, too!” he spat, his palms sticky with sweat. “Haru always thought he was too good for me, that I would always be beneath him, well, he was wrong and _I proved it!_ ”

“That’s _enough,_ ” said Tachibana, his voice low yet cutting hard as steel. Rin could feel his hands tremble, but Tachibana did not so much as blink. “I knew it. I knew you said something like that, just to kick him while he was down.”

“Then why the hell did you ask me?!” snapped Rin.

“Because I wanted to be sure,” replied Tachibana, shrugging his stiff shoulders in a weak attempt to loosen them. “Even before the race, I had a feeling you didn’t challenge Haru for the reasons he thought. You had an agenda. You _still_ have an agenda. You should have raced Haru, accepted your victory, and made peace with him so you could both move on. Instead you suddenly entered the Samezuka relay, even though you had no interest in the relay at prefecturals. Care to explain _that,_ Rin? Can you tell me why you keep stalking Haru in the hopes of beating him again?”

Rin bared his teeth in a growl.

“My goal isn’t to beat Haru. And it’s not to win tournaments in this country, either. I aim higher. My goal is the world.”

“The Olympic stage your father aspired to when he was young?” asked Tachibana. Rin shot him a baleful glare, just barely able to hold back at the mention of his idol.

“You know an awful lot about me considering you obviously hate my guts,” he allowed himself to say with a queasy smirk. “Are you really so obsessed with me?”

“Not as obsessed as you seem to be with Haru,” replied Tachibana calmly, though his face darkened considerably in the effort. “So here’s one more question for you. How do you feel about Haru?”

“ _Huh?!_ ” blurted Rin, his face paling except for reddish blotches of anger and embarrassment. Tachibana, equally flushed, took another sharp breath.

“Back in elementary school, you and Haru were rivals… even friends,” he began. “I’ve seen pictures of you and the others from when you still went to the Iwatobi Swimming Club. Back then, you used to grin and laugh all the time, and the four of you seemed to be happy together.”

Rin’s face hardened. His fingers clenched, nails digging half moons into his palm.

“I don’t know what happened to you in Australia. No one else seems to know either, but your relationship with Haru changed when you lost the race during winter break,” carried on Tachibana, his hands flitting upward as though he were pleading with Rin. “Losing the race upset you, _I get that_. But it’s been three years now, so why are you still hung up about this? Why do you keep stalking Haru, and why haven’t you apologized to him yet for all you put him through? And for that matter, why are you always so rude to Rei and Nagisa, or so cold and distant with your sister?”

“ _Shut up!_ ” snapped Rin, lurching a step forward with his shoulders shaking in suppressed rage. “I let you talk and you think you can just spout all this bullshit at me?! Why do I have to explain myself to you?!”

Makoto drew another deep breath, then let it out in a huff, his heart pounding fiercely. The well pooled in his throat, waiting to erupt, and the moment he opened his mouth, it burst forward in all its misery like raw sewage from a broken pipe.

“Because I’m getting really tired of you,” he said at last, his own hands slowly clenching into fists. “I have been part of the Iwatobi Swim Club since late May. I originally attended joint practice and joined the club so there would be four swimmers and the club would survive, and I’ve been training constantly with everyone so they could compete again like they’ve been wanting to for years now. I know I’m not like them. They are all talented athletes and I’m, I’m not. Swimming has been very hard for me, so all this time I kept telling myself that I’m just filling their quota, and this is all I could ever hope to be. But the more time I spent with them, the more I realized that I wanted more than that. I wanted to be an equal, a real teammate… I wanted to be a friend who mattered to them as much as they matter to me, but no matter what I do, I’m just not good enough!”

Rin’s heart skipped a beat. Makoto could feel his cheek burn, but he could no longer hold it back.

“I messed up one time, _one time_ because I was scared and nobody’s letting me live it down!” he cried, his face scrunched up painfully. “It’s been two months now and they still think I’m this uncontrollable monster. But _you…_ no matter what you pull, over and over again, everyone just keeps excusing you like you can do no wrong. You are rude to Rei and Nagisa and nobody’s batting an eyelid! You hurt Haru every time you meet him, but everyone keeps defending you! You are horrible to your sister, who loves you and cares about you! _How dare you?_ What kind of friend or brother are you?!”

“ ** _Shut up!_** ” howled Rin when he could no longer take it. “Who the hell do you think you are?! Do you really think you’re better then me?! You’re obviously not if _they don’t care about you!_ ”

At those words, Tachibana swallowed hard, while Rin’s eyes widened with the savage glint of a predator that had sunk its teeth in the throat of its prey. After struggling to find his grip, he finally tore Tachibana open, and he was not going to stop until he bled him silent.

“That’s right, you self-righteous bastard!” he bellowed, his fists whipped backwards as he leaned forward to let his voice ring out across the yard. “You said it yourself! You are nothing more than filler, and you’re _pathetic_ at that! I saw you swim at joint practice and I’ve heard about your humiliating stunt at the one-hundred meter backstroke. There’s no way you’ve been swimming long, and nobody in their right mind takes amateurs to a tournament! Those idiots only got you to join because the absolute worst was the very best they could do! You are the poor man’s backstroke swimmer. They only let you swim because they can’t have _me_ anymore! I’m the one who’s too good for them now, so all they can do is tolerate your lame attempts to fill in my shoes! Nobody gives a damn about you, _Haru included!_ ”

Makoto stared at him as though he had been struck in the face. Rin’s silhouette blurred, sharpened, then blurred again to the beat of his heart.

“You’re wrong…” he breathed, his chest unbearably tight. “They do care about me… Haru.. is my best friend.”

Rin let out a curt laugh, his own chest convulsing so violently the sounds ripped from his lips like froth splattering into the air.

“Yeah, it really shows from the way you came all the way out here just to cry to me about how much they abuse you,” he wheezed, choking on his own bittersweet laughter. Makoto, equally distraught, made a sad attempt to straighten and level his shoulders one more time.

“Even suppose you’re right,” he said in a thick tone, “and I really am nothing more than filler or your replacement… I don’t care. If that’s all I can be, then I will do my best to stand in your place and take care of my friends. Maybe I will never swim as well as you, but I still make a better friend or brother than you _ever_ have!”

At first Rin listened to the other’s foolish hopes with scorn, even annoyance, but at that final jab, he froze, his heart a fragile crystal dangling from a shard of ice. A vein began to throb in his temple, his vision bleeding crimson as his mind retaliated with a shattered mosaic of memories. Sano, Sousuke, running, backstroke, _For the Team_ , split Christmas cakes, Gou’s tiny hand in his…

“Say that again…” he seethed through chattering teeth.

Makoto’s adam’s apple twitched up and down, but no amount of shame or disappointment in himself could take the insult back. Some things, once spoken, lingered on forever.

“You heard me well enough the first time,” he said quietly, his expression somber.

Rin wanted to laugh. He wanted to laugh so badly, but the sound trickled down the gash in his own throat where Tachibana managed to puncture him at last. The world drowned with it. The rustle of foliage, bird song, muffled yelling from inside the indoor pool no longer reached Rin’s ears or registered in his consciousness. Something inside him shattered, until all that remained was the shapeless figure of Tachibana in the distance… and the all-consuming urge to blot him out.

The next moment, Rin let out a wounded howl and charged towards Tachibana, managing to seize him by the collar of his shirt and jerk him forward before the other could react. His other hand clenched into a fist and whipped upwards simultaneously, pulling back to punch Tachibana in the face.

Makoto froze as his body went into shock, arms hanging limply by his sides. The moment Rin grabbed him, it finally dawned on him that there was nothing he could do to protect himself from the consequences of his needless ultimatum, not without dooming himself to be forever branded as a violent brute. It was over. Within seconds, Rin was going to discover that Makoto was completely helpless.

Opposite him, Rin’s fist broke into tremors as it hovered in the air. Fueled by the urge to destroy the other, Rin rushed forward without thought, on the wings of his instincts, but the way Tachibana let himself be yanked forward, how he stood perfectly still with a look of surprise on his face finally pulled Rin out of his stupor. He was on the verge of hitting another student in broad daylight on Samezuka grounds. If anyone caught him attacking a defenseless student, he would be kicked out and never be able to show his face again…

His left eye twitched in helpless anger. _Come on… move, you bastard… don’t just stand there and take it, give me a **real** excuse!_

He flicked his fist sharply in the air, hoping his sudden maneuver would finally spark a reaction.

Instead, Makoto’s eyes widened in horror, his jaw dropping soundlessly.

Rin’s heart stopped.

_The world faded into white on all sides. He was walking down the pier with small, confined steps behind the procession, Gou’s tiny hand in his. He could feel her squeeze his hand, hard, but as he turned to look at her, his gaze drifted over her head to a boy in faded blue overalls, mouth agape and his large green eyes wide in horror. He stood perfectly alone, petrified like a thunderstruck sapling after the storm. The entire procession passed him once, then twice on the way back, and when Rin and Gou left the pier to go home with their mother and grandmother, the boy was still there, still by himself, staring at the ocean like it had taken everything from him._

_That boy had never left the pier. Rin continued to see him in his nightmares, always the same, always standing in the same godforsaken spot in those faded blue overalls and a green shirt while Rin and Gou wore white shirts in honor of the dead. That boy could have had no idea he was going to attend a funeral, yet the terrified look on his face told Rin he belonged there all the same. Whom had he lost? And why did no one come for him? The idea continued to torture Rin, the unresolved mystery of the boy on the pier that no dreamlike act of his could find the conclusion of. Each time Rin tried to escape that endless procession of his nightmares, some invisible barrier separated him and the boy, forcing Rin to pass by him every single time._

_At first, Rin thought it no more than something strange and unfortunate, the perverse wantonness of nightmares, but as he grew older, taller, stronger, the idea of leaving that frightened child behind slowly became unbearable. Rin eventually rose to the level of the men marching forward, while that boy remained small and fragile, and each time the dream flowed inexorably forward, Rin could only watch with guilt as he abandoned that nameless child over and over again._

_Over the years, Rin must have left him behind a thousand times, but that little boy just kept coming back to haunt him, and now his nightmare was standing right in front of him, that same look of horror in those large, green, drooping eyes…_

Rin’s fist grew limp and fell to his side lifelessly, his other hand trembling around Makoto’s collar in a cold, clammy grasp.

“Who the hell are you…?” he breathed, his voice shrill in panic. “After all these years, why are you still giving me all this grief? _What more do you want from me?!_ ”

Makoto continued to stare at Rin for what felt like an eternity, until he realized at last that he had survived the assault unharmed. He slowly straightened, drawing Rin’s grasping hand with him, his chest jumping under the summer uniform that was now a button short where Rin had tugged the collar so sharply the thread gave way. Makoto took a soft, shallow breath.

“I just want to swim with my friends,” he said, his voice paper thin. “I want to help Haru heal so he can move on and be happy..!”

Silence fell between them as it was Rin’s turn to stare at Makoto surprised. His chest gaped perfectly hollow but for the echo of the other. To swim with his friends… _move on…_ _was such a thing even possible anymore…?_

Rin’s lips parted, but nothing came out. Slowly, ever so gradually, his fingers uncurled around the collar to release it, watching as it sagged sadly below the knot of that dotted green tie. He wanted to move, to at least take a step backwards, but his feet felt welded to the ground, as though the boy on the pier had finally passed his curse on to him.

No longer restrained, Makoto retreated towards the wall where his duffel bag lay. He reached for it with clumsy fingers, losing his grip twice before he finally managed to lift it up. He tucked it under his arm, letting the strap dangle in the air. Makoto seemed to hesitate, but then turned to face Rin one more time, his cheeks pale and numb.

“You’ve already caused enough pain to everyone,” he said in a strained tone, his eyes still large and glassy. “If you hurt Haru again, I will never forgive you.”

Makoto then turned to start walking with winding steps, leaving Rin to stand there thunderstruck, desperately wanting to wake up from his nightmare.

* * *

While he was still in Rin’s line of sight, Makoto continued to lurch forward, forbidding himself from looking back or running off like a frightened child. He thought the straight path leading from the indoor pool to the front yard would never end, but when he finally reached a turn, he risked a glance backwards.

He could not see Rin anymore, nor could he remember if he had seen any students on his way or not. Wearing a blaringly different uniform in open sight as he did, he now stood eerily alone in the front yard, staring at the gate that gaped in the wall like an open, hungry maw.

Makoto stumbled towards it, then broke into a run like his life depended on it, tearing through the gate and down the road to the train station. He did not stop until he reached the platform, where the electronic billboard promised the arrival of the next train in five minutes. Makoto doubled over in momentary relief, hands grasping at his knees as everything inside him wobbled on loose wires, threatening to break.

His relief did not last long. By the time Makoto boarded the train, his fingers were trembling, and when he found a vacant seat at last, his legs all but gave out from under him. He collapsed in a broken heap, lifting a shaky hand to drag it down his face.

_What have I done..?_

_What good did any of this do…?_

His convulsions told him he had done absolutely nothing beyond exposing himself to danger, made all the worse by letting his passion carry him away. Was there any excuse to lose his head like that, to hurl verbal abuse at Rin just because he felt hurt and frustrated? All he wanted was to talk, that was what Makoto told himself all along, but what had he accomplished beyond making himself look like an aggressor, who went out of his way looking for trouble, then got scared out of his mind when he nearly got his just desserts?

 _I should have listened to Haru,_ thought Makoto, his face scrunching up in shame. Haru knew he was a loose cannon, so he tried everything he could to make Makoto stay, but Makoto didn’t listen. He never, ever listened, did he..?

Oh, how Haru must hate him for being such an idiot. How could he face his best friend now..?

Makoto buried his face in his hands, his shoulders helplessly convulsing as the train inched on excruciatingly slow.

* * *

After an hour of huddling in the corner of the car, arms wrapped around himself, Makoto arrived at Iwatobi Station, where he all but threw himself onto the platform, breaking into a run the moment his feet touched the ground. He no longer cared if anyone saw him. He bounded down the street, soon racing along the bay, letting his desperation fuel and burn him until he was dragging himself up the hillside with stumbling steps.

Makoto was gasping for air by the time he reached the stone stairs, then climbed the steps to the gate. He pushed it open, bracing himself for a final spurt to the front door, then inside and up the staircase to his room, slamming the door shut behind him.

Downstairs, the rest of his family drifted into the hallway one by one, each having abandoned some task they’ve busied themselves with as they waited for Makoto to come have lunch with them. The front door remained open in his haste. His father furrowed his brow.

“Ren, shut the door,” he said quietly. Ren nodded and hurried over, peeking out into the front yard just in case someone was there before pulling the door closed. He then joined his family again by the bottom of the staircase, where his father lifted a hand to his mouth.

“Makoto!” he called out as if in greeting. No reply followed.

The twins exchanged nervous glances. Their father set his jaw.

“That’s it. I’m going to talk to him,” he said, stepping forward to climb the staircase only to feel his wife’s arms wrap around his waist, restraining him with tender force.

“Wait,” she said gently, her voice a little worn. “He probably needs some time to calm down first. Please.”

A pause. He sighed.

“Fine. I’ll give him ten minutes, but then I’ll go.”

“What if we went instead?” offered Ran with a worried grin. He shook his head, but his features grew less severe until he managed a small, tired smile at the twins.

“Let me do the talking just this once, okay?” he said, keeping his tone mild. “I promise it will be fine. All we want is for your brother to be happy, right?”

Ran and Ren nodded in synch. Their father’s smile softened.

“Well, that’s what I want, too,” he said, his hands cupping his wife’s fingers by his waist to squeeze them tenderly. She pressed back, then untangled herself, turning to the twins so she could gather them into a quick hug.

“Go back to your assignments, okay?” she said with a troubled smile. “Your father will check on Makoto and when they come down, we’ll have lunch together. If Makoto doesn’t feel well enough to eat, I’ll save his portion for later.”

Ran and Ren reluctantly hummed, then shuffled back to their summer assignments in the living room, each peering back one more time at their parents before disappearing.

Their father and mother stayed in the hallway for a moment longer. She rubbed a hand down his back. He kissed her temple.

“You can go back, too,” he whispered. “I’ll just wait here.”

She nodded and left for the kitchen to check on the udon. He checked his watch.

* * *

When the prescribed ten minutes were officially up, Makoto’s father proceeded upstairs, steeling himself as he placed a careful hand on the doorknob. He pulled the door open and found Makoto in bed, buried so completely in his blankets his father could not even tell where his son was facing. The shapeless mound appeared to rise and fall at even intervals, as if Makoto were sound asleep. His father drew closer with quiet steps, stopping by the foot of the bed. He cleared his throat.

“I don’t know if you can hear me,” he began, his voice low and strained. “But I will say this, Makoto. If you want, you can quit the swim club at _any_ time, and your mother and I will not be upset or disappointed at all. I will not let anyone say one word about it. If you’re unhappy at that club, then just let it go and find another club.” He paused. “…Or no club, even. That’s alright, too. I really don’t mind anymore.”

There was a slight break of rhythm, as though Makoto had tensed up under the sheets. His father sighed.

“Just… think about it, son. We don’t want you to be miserable because of some high school club. You deserve better than that.”

He then turned around and left, closing the door as quietly as he had opened it.

Back on the bed, the blankets quaked over Makoto’s shoulders.


	57. EPISODE 11: Desperate All-out! - Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As Makoto and Rin fell from the earth and descended into a hell mutually wrought, morning practice at Iwatobi High School progressed slowly and uneventfully. Once Rei conducted the team’s warm-up stretches, which even Haruka joined to quell his guilt over failing to detain Makoto, Coach Sasabe lined them up by the starting block and exchange practice began, with Sasabe swimming every leg of backstroke so the others wouldn’t have to do double duty as substitutes for Makoto. As usual, Haru dived last, and when he reached the block, he paused, eyes lowered to the water as though Makoto might magically reappear to reach out his hand if Haru just let himself be taken unawares.

Instead, Sasabe yelled at him to get out of the pool and line up behind Rei again, and Haru glared hard at the pavement as he hoisted himself out with no help from anyone.

Though they had every cause for cheer, what with the first term finished and the beginning of summer vacation, in the two hours they spent at the pool, everyone spoke very little beyond what was absolutely necessary. Whenever Coach Sasabe wasn’t swimming, he limited himself to barking orders. In the course of practicing his stroke uninterrupted, Haru eventually shed his bitterness, but in Makoto’s uncomfortable absence, even the water felt like a page of Haru’s life riddled with holes and him teetering on the edges.

The effort rendered him taciturn and elusive. While they swam in neighboring lanes, Nagisa and Rei tried to engage him several times, to no avail. He left them no choice but to discuss Makoto’s unexpected disappearance among themselves, only to have Sasabe breathing down their necks with a megaphone for idling about instead of practicing. As for Kou, she had settled into a folding chair with a pile of notes, and as long as she busied herself with these, she could not be persuaded to divide her attention, not even for their muscles’ sake.

Ama-chan eventually made her appearance by the pool, but upon her arrival, she hurried off at once to fetch herself a folding chair, then joined Kou, the two soon immersed in excited conversation that had nothing to do with Makoto’s absence beyond a simple acknowledgement. Haruka should know. He eavesdropped on them with his head carefully turned to one side while he awaited his turn at the block, but heard only of budgets, accommodation, and registration times, matters that could have no claim on his interest while others were certain to take care of them.

He hardly knew what he had hoped to hear. Speak of the devil and he might appear, but Makoto was no demon. In fact, he turned out to be quite the opposite, and when Haru thought of how he had imagined Makoto the greatest evil that first week of school, he wanted to laugh at himself but couldn’t. Not even a little. Not with Makoto gone.

 _This is all Rin’s fault_ , he told himself, but the idea brought no comfort, no matter how temporary. After all, if Haru had done and behaved better, Makoto wouldn’t have chosen Rin over practice…

* * *

Kou and Ama-chan continued to pore over Kou’s notes for the rest of practice, but once Sasabe blew his whistle and ordered the boys out of the pool, Ama-chan stood up to join them with her parasol in hand. They bowed in greeting. She nodded with a smile.

“Matsuoka-san told me Tachibana-kun is unwell,” she said in kind concern, her eyes drifting from one troubled face to another. Haru turned his head, his gaze dropping to the concrete, but Rei nodded in the affirmative.

“We don’t know the exact reason for Makoto-san’s disappearance, but he will hopefully return to us soon,” he replied with a push of his goggles. Ama-chan thanked him with a smile.

“If you see him, please tell him we hope to see him again soon. And remind him of the wise words of Buddha,” she added, head poised and eyes solemnly closed as she lifted a stern finger. “ _To keep the body in good health is a duty... otherwise we shall not be able to keep our mind strong and clear_.”

The others stared back at her with dwindling interest. She cocked her head cheerfully.

“Well, Matsuoka-san and I have some very important business to take care of, so we must leave you,” she said next, giving her parasol a dainty twirl. “We shall see you tomorrow.”

“Yes, have a good weekend, Amakata-sensei!” bowed Sasabe reverently.

“Goodbye,” murmured the boys, Nagisa waving to Kou as she and Ama-chan left the pool area, soon disappearing down the path.

* * *

With no ladies around to see or watch anymore, the four swimmers rinsed themselves off under the showers, then retired to the club room, where the discussion of Makoto’s absence was revived once more, this time courtesy of Nagisa.

“I wonder if Mako-chan’s okay,” he said in a tentative tone as he wrapped a towel around his waist to pull off his jammers.

“If he’s feeling unwell, we might have to cancel afternoon practice,” mused Rei, though his tone reflected no irritation or disappointment, only muted concern. Haru’s shoulders slumped as he lowered his head.

“He’ll be fine,” he said, staring in vain at the empty cubby holes next to his. “He’ll be back tomorrow.”

“How are you so sure, Haru-chan?” asked Nagisa. Haru bit his lip.

“He said he would,” he replied in a thick tone. Rei frowned.

“I have a distinct feeling you know more of this affair than you have chosen to divulge, Haruka-senpai,” he muttered with narrowed eyes. Haru colored and turned his head.

“Still, this is worrisome,” continued Rei as he cupped his chin, rubbing a thumb up and down his jawline. “It’s not like Makoto-san to leave without notice.”

“Damn that guy…” groaned Sasabe behind their backs. “Doesn’t he know that an athlete needs to take care of himself?”

The others turned their heads, expecting to find him ready to leave, but their coach, only half dressed, still lingered in a folding chair facing the opposite wall, one hand reaching backwards to sink into his back pocket. He pulled out his wallet, drawing it into his lap. The others exchanged curious glances.

“Here!” said Sasabe as he turned around to face them at last, a one thousand yen bill pinched between his fingers. He reached it out to them with a wink. “Go check on him.”

Rei and Nagisa blinked at him surprised, but Haru shuffled forward to pluck the money from Sasabe’s hands.

“Tell him to get well soon,” grinned Sasabe, but unable to smile, Haru hummed quietly as he folded the bill, sinking it into the bottom of his pocket.

* * *

Having done his fair share of good deeds, Sasabe soon took his leave, and once the boys changed, packed their duffel bags, and locked up after themselves, they too set out for the shopping avenue in the heart of Iwatobi town, in the hopes of finding an appropriate gift for Makoto.

“What we should buy for Makoto-san? Any ideas?” asked Rei as the shops and stalls of the avenue finally swam into their view. Nagisa swayed his arm vigorously.

“Oh, oh!” he cried like he might just burst from his spark of genius. “Why don’t we order him a pizza from Goro-chan’s place? He should be able to deliver it by the time we get to Mako-chan’s house, and then we can all have some together!”

Haru and Rei stared at him blankly.

“What..?” blurted Nagisa, his hands thrown into the air. “Isn’t it the greatest plan ever?”

“For one thing,” began Rei with an indignant grimace, “using Sasabe-sensei’s money to purchase his services is probably the very last thing he intended for us to do, Nagisa-kun. And for another, pizza and delivery is not in our price range!”

“We could all chip in, then!” pleaded Nagisa. “After all, Mako-chan’s happiness is worth the price of a large pepperoni pizza with extra cheese, right, Haru-chan?” he added as he clasped his hands together, peering up at Haruka with twinkling eyes.

Haru didn’t so much as glance in Nagisa’s direction, but after a moment’s pause, he reached into his back pocket and pulled out his wallet with a determined expression. Rei choked.

“ _Don’t encourage his ridiculous ideas, Haruka-senpai!_ ” he screeched. Haru pursed his lips, but put his wallet away. Nagisa puffed his cheeks.

“Well, what do _you_ suggest we get, Rei-chan?” he whined, evidently disappointed that he had been cheated out of his delicious plan. Rei fixed his glasses.

“I do believe fruit is the customary gift to bring to someone who is feeling unwell,” he said, folding his arms over his chest. “Unless anyone has evidence to the contrary,” he continued, shooting a sharp look at Haru, who whipped his head away, “we must assume Makoto-san is unwell, and would therefore appreciate the gesture that a gift of fruit conveys.”

Nagisa could only shrug in defeat at such a deplorably boring plan, knowing fully well that no one could argue with the proper observation of traditions, not with Ryuugazaki Rei.

“Fruit, then,” he said, lifting a hand over his eyes as he swayed left and right to scout the avenue. Haru turned around, then pointed a finger.

“The vendor’s over there,” he said quietly, taking a step forward to guide them over to the stall a few meters away. Rei and Nagisa followed him obediently, soon stopping in front of a dozen crates packed to the brim with all the fresh produce high summer had to offer.

“What shall we buy?” asked Rei.

“We should get him a melon!” replied Nagisa, crouching down to look at the muskmelons handsomely wrapped in individual boxes.

“That is definitely not in our price range,” muttered Rei as he and Haruka sank down next to Nagisa, Rei squinting in disdain at the tag that offered one measly melon for almost six thousand yen.

“How about wild oranges, then?” said Nagisa with a wink, but Rei only scoffed at his brilliant pun, then went on a quiet tirade about why the _Citrus Tachibana_ was anything but edible or desirable as a get-well gift. Haru said nothing, his lips pursed in deep thought. Had he ever seen Makoto eat fruit before? Aside from that one slice of watermelon, which was the only option they had for dessert at Sasabe’s get-together, Haru could not recall a single instance of his having shown a preference for fruit, or his bringing fruit to school in any shape or form. Makoto’s bento was usually packed with rice and meat, though sometimes he brought oily newspaper parcels with fried squid inside, but fruit or even sweet things? Nothing beyond the occasional batch of mochi, or that soda-flavored popsicle Haru remembered sharing with him after school… until, at last, a helpful memory presented itself as well: Makoto seated by Haruka’s living room table, nibbling away at a chocolate bar piece by broken piece over his homework.

“We’ll get him chocolate. He likes that,” Haru said out loud, rising up at once to turn away from the vendor with stiff shoulders. Rei and Nagisa turned to stare blankly at each other, then to Haruka, but by the time they lifted their heads, Haru had taken off towards a gift shop further down. The others sprung up to dash after him, catching up with Haruka just as he opened the door of the shop to step inside.

“Are you sure about this, Haruka-senpai?” murmured Rei as they followed him, having never been one for sweet things, and firm in his opinion that chocolate served little purpose beyond accompanying heartfelt confessions on Valentine’s Day. Nagisa, however, looked delighted at Haruka’s proposal.

“Alright, chocolate it is!” he cried as he threw his hands in the air, then balled them into excited fists by his chest. “Do we get him a bar or a box?”

“I’m not sure if there are any boxes in our price range,” muttered Rei, his hands clasped behind his back in growing discomfort.

“Let’s look,” shrugged Haruka.

Before Rei might argue, he made his way to the display shelves, where a dozen boxes of all shapes and sizes promised everything from white, milk or dark chocolate, to confections made with fruit, matcha, spices, and even wasabi. After some consideration, Haru picked one of the boxes off the top shelf, turning around to show it to Rei and Nagisa.

“Is this okay?” he asked, holding it out with a guarded expression.

“It’s.. _red and heart-shaped_ ,” mumbled Rei with flushed cheeks.

“The bow is a nice touch,” winked Nagisa. Haru colored.

“It’s shaped like a heart, to show Makoto that we like him… and that we don’t think he’s horrible at all,” he replied in a thick tone, his eyes averted. Rei quirked his brow.

“Haruka-senpai… neither of us thinks Makoto-san is horrible.”

Haru looked back at him in genuine surprise.

“You don’t?” he asked, his brow creased in hopeful arches. Nagisa shook his head.

“Of course not, Haru-chan. What gave you that idea?” he asked in genuine curiosity. Haru lowered his eyes and turned his head, pulling the box closer to himself like a chocolate shield.

“You thought Makoto was going to beat up Rin at prefecturals. That sounds like something only a horrible person would do,” he replied, his shoulders defensively arched. Nagisa stuck out his tongue in thought, searching his mind until the conversation by the vending machine clicked in at last.

“Ah, ha ha, I did say something like that, didn’t I…” he mumbled in embarrassment. “But I also said that’s what it _looked like_ , and I never said Mako-chan was horrible or anything!” he continued, gesturing vividly at Haruka. “So we were in the hallway, right,” he carried on, looking to Rei, who nodded to confirm the details whenever Nagisa prompted. “Rin-chan was gloating about how he won, and then he yelled at Mako-chan, and then he even yelled at Rei-chan and told him he didn’t care about anything we said, and that he beat you and that’s all he cared about. He then walked past us, and that was when Mako-chan turned around like he wanted to go after him. He couldn’t go because we stopped him and told him he had to swim, so we don’t really know what Mako-chan wanted to do, but he looked pretty angry, so I just thought he wanted to go after Rin-chan and call him out for being so mean. That doesn’t make Mako-chan horrible, does it? Being angry like that is just being human,” he finished with a shrug.

“So you don’t think he’s horrible,” prodded Haru with a squint. Rei and Nagisa shook their heads in unison. “Then… maybe you could tell him that, when we visit him..” risked Haru, his throat so tight the words could barely crawl through. Rei furrowed his brow.

“Haruka-senpai… has there been an altercation between yourself and Makoto-san today?”

Haru flinched. Nagisa frowned.

“What happened, Haru-chan? And where did Mako-chan go?” he asked wide-eyed, he and Rei drawing a little closer. Haru’s arms wrapped around the heart-shaped box instinctively, pressing it to his chest.

“He.. went to Samezuka, to see Rin,” he mumbled, lowering his head with a guilty frown.

“ _Eh?_ Why?” blurted Nagisa. Haru swallowed. Rei cupped his chin with a troubled expression.

“Could we have upset him somehow?” he mused, his eyes flitting from Haruka to Nagisa. “Makoto-san _has_ been rather subdued this week, but we’ve all been exhausted from increased practice hours and running, so I just attributed that to fatigue… and I don’t remember there being any incidents at our get-together yesterday.”

“He did ask about Rin-chan on the way home, though,” said Nagisa. “Maybe we talked so much of Rin-chan that we made Mako-chan feel weird and left out.”

“Has he stated his reasons for seeing Rin-senpai?” asked Rei. Haru bit his lip.

“He said he had to talk to him… because only Rin could tell him what he wanted to know,” he replied, his heart clenching at the thought of betraying Makoto’s secret when he had been guarding it so faithfully.

“I see,” replied Rei with a deepening frown. “And from what you said of being perceived as horrible, I take it Makoto-san felt antagonized by a certain member or members of the swim club..?” he continued, his tone strained. Haru nodded heavily at the floor.

“Poor Mako-chan…” moaned Nagisa, his cheeks pale and sunken. “I didn’t mean to make him feel horrible…”

“We keep failing him in unprecedented ways,” mumbled Rei, his own cheeks hot with shame. “He is… unusually sensitive.”

Haru’s arms sagged, the box now dangling from one hand. Nagisa cracked an unsure smile.

“Get him that box, then,” he said gently, putting a hand on Haruka’s shoulder. “If Mako-chan likes chocolate, he’ll be happy, since it’s the chocolate that really counts, right?”

“Well, if you went by that logic, then it would be far more practical and generous of us to get him several bars of chocolate to achieve maximum amount to price ratio,” said Rei with a push of his glasses. Nagisa snorted.

“You’re hopeless, Rei-chan,” he giggled. Rei huffed.

“I am perfectly serious and make the most sense!” he snapped at Nagisa, his cheeks reddening as he went on. “Imagine what Makoto-san’s parents might think if three men showed up at the door with a red heart-shaped box of chocolates with a bow on it! Think of the _scandal_ we would stir up in the neighborhood, Nagisa-kun! A gesture of that sort should not be flaunted by _anyone_ unless it is genuinely meant!”

“Alright, alright,” giggled Nagisa nervously, one hand reaching up to rub the back of his head. “I guess Haru-chan will just have to save the box for another time…”

Haru smacked the box against the back of Nagisa’s head before returning it to the shelf with a glare. Rei choked and spun around with his heart thumping, but thankfully the clerk didn’t notice the potential damage Haruka’s flick of the wrist and Nagisa’s diamond cranium might have inflicted on the red heart-shaped box or its precious chocolate cargo. Rei turned back to the others, one hand pressed over his heart. Haru let out a miffed _hmph_.

“We’ll get him chocolate bars, then,” he said in a hardened tone, pointing to the selection on the lower shelves.

After careful comparison of prices and amounts on Rei’s calculator app, they settled on a fun-size chocolate bar that came in a dozen unique flavors. Unsure of Makoto’s preferences, everyone picked two kinds for a total of six different bars, staying just a notch below their designated quota.

“There, it’s perfect,” said Rei as he arranged them in a neat row on the bottom of the shopping cart, admiring their perfect symmetry until Haru dropped two more on top and promptly dismantled the row. Rei let out a strangled noise.

“I’ll pay for those,” said Haru quickly. Rei and Nagisa looked to him puzzled. Haru cleared his throat. “For the twins.”

Rei and Nagisa stared back wide-eyed.

“ _Oohhh_ ,” they breathed in awe of their friend’s attentiveness to Makoto’s siblings. Being the youngest in their respective families, the thought of there being children to attend to never entered their heads. Meanwhile, whenever Haru looked at his new blue apron with a dolphin on its top pocket, he was reminded of the twins, and how they would have thrown Haru a birthday dinner if they could have. With so much consideration for himself despite being little more than a stranger, it was only fair to include them in return.

And besides, Makoto would just end up sharing or giving away his chocolate if they gave the twins nothing. This way, their gift could be his and his alone.

* * *

While Haru, Rei and Nagisa made their purchase, Makoto remained in his bed, lulled into a deep sleep by the darkness of his covers that no gentle word or touch could dispel. His family had lunch without him, often glancing to his empty plate as they ate, and when they finished, his mother snuck upstairs to check on Makoto, peeling back the blankets just enough to uncover her son’s face. He lay with his head facing the room, expression forlorn even in sleep.

She ran a gentle hand through his hair, combing rogue tufts and stubborn spikes into place out of habit. Though he let out a small, ragged sigh, he didn’t stir, not even to the quiet call of his name. She lowered her head, holding onto her crumbling smile for his sake as she pressed a soft kiss to Makoto’s temple. His features softened a little. She tiptoed out of the room to let him rest.

She returned to the others downstairs, where they passed the next half hour quiet and subdued, wandering restlessly from room to room in search of something useful, something _helpful_ to do. Ran and Ren eventually set aside their summer assignments for a stack of crisp printer paper and a set of colored pencils, to draw silly-looking cats for Onii-chan. His mother checked the cupboards, wondering what treats she could make at a moment’s notice if Makoto expressed any desire to eat at all. As for his father, he sat down in his study to mull over a dozen carefully crafted arguments he would never be able to have with the infamous Iwatobi Swim Club, not unless fate brought them right to his doorstep and no one in the house interfered. Those were his conditions, half made in the hopes they would never be fulfilled, for the only thing that could have pained him more would have been to ruin his son’s budding relationships by frightening away his friends, friends who nonetheless seemed to torture Makoto in unfathomable ways…

The doorbell screamed into the stale silence of the room, startling him out of his inner turmoil. A moment later, he could hear the screech of several pairs of feet, probably the twins scrambling across the living room floor to climb into the window for a quick look.

“Haru-chan! Haru-chan!” he could hear them chant, then make another dash towards the front door. He rose to his feet and left his study in a hurry, entering the hallway just as his wife reached the staircase, evidently bested to the front door by her recklessly racing children.

“Is it who I think it is?” he asked. She cocked her head towards the living room. He walked in just far enough to glance out, his eyes falling on three students standing by the gate. “No. There’s three of them.”

“Then it must be the swim club,” she replied. “Wait, no, there should be four, since there are five members. Are you sure there aren’t four of them? Three boys and a girl?”

He shook his head as he withdrew from the living room, taking a deep breath when he reached his wife. She trailed a gentle hand down his arm. He straightened his shoulders.

“If they have come to explain themselves, I will see them in my study,” he said quietly. She flashed him a smile to let him know his wishes were understood, but whether she would relay them or not, the smile did not say. He squeezed her hand softly before leaving the hallway with heavy steps. She shook her head, then headed upstairs to Makoto’s room.

* * *

She found Makoto fast asleep once more, but this time, she had no choice but to rouse her son if she wanted him to stand any chance of looking presentable to his visitors.

“Makoto… Makoto,” she whispered, scratching at his scalp and lightly tugging at longer tufts of hair until Makoto let out a groan, opening one eye just barely to peek up at her. She flashed him a soothing smile. “You have guests, Makoto.”

“Wha..?” mumbled her son, his eyes opening and closing out of sync.

“The swim club is here to see you,” she explained with loving patience. His eyes flew open in pure horror.

“ _No!_ ” he cried, then slapped a hand over his mouth as though that could swat the word silent. “No, I can’t see them right now,” pleaded Makoto in a muffled tone from behind his hand, pulling the blankets back onto his head with the other. “Please tell them I’m not here, that, that I’m sick, and I’ve gone somewhere else…!”

“The twins already answered the door and probably told them you’re home,” she said in an apologetic tone.

“Tell them they’re grounded,” he whined. She laughed.

“I’m afraid it’s too late to pretend you’re not here,” she said with a light shrug, not that he could see it from his self-imposed blindfold. She tugged at the folds. He pulled them back. “So come out from under there, okay? I’ll send them to your room.”

“Nooo..!” whined Makoto, feet smacking repeatedly against the mattress in an endearingly petulant tantrum. She cleared her throat with a small cough.

“Would you rather they go and sit with your father in his study like he asked?”

Makoto flinched. He poked his head out from under the blanket to stare at her.

“ _He didn’t…_ ” he whispered. She nodded gravely. Makoto groaned. “Fine… I’ll get up.”

She kissed the top of his head. He planted his face in the pillow to muffle an agitated growl.

“I’ll heat up your lunch for you,” she said as she walked out, closing the door behind her and leaving Makoto to put himself in order as best he could.

* * *

Downstairs, the twins rushed forward to meet the swim club, crowding in the gateway as soon as they opened it to form an impassable barrier that inadvertently reminded Rei of young Pokémon trainers stopping him en route to request double battles. He and Nagisa at least had the foresight to send Haruka to the front lines, so the twins mainly swarmed around him with hopeful smiles and puppy dog eyes.

“Haru-chan, Haru-chan!” they cried, each grabbing the wrist closest to them. Haru tensed.

“We came to see Makoto,” he said quietly. The twins peered at each other, then careened their heads towards their guests.

“Onii-chan is sleeping,” replied Ran.

“Sleeping?” echoed Rei in a surprised tone. The twins nodded.

“Whenever Onii-chan comes home sad or tired, he immediately goes upstairs to sleep, without even saying hello,” explained Ren.

It was Nagisa and Rei’s turn to exchange awkward looks.

“Does this behavior occur often..?” risked Rei. They nodded gravely.

“It happened an awful lot in June, and it kept happening every day this week,” said Ran with a meaningful glare from one boy to another. Rei swallowed and averted his eyes, half wishing he could sink into the concrete. Beside him, Nagisa cracked an unnerved grin as he lifted his hands in surrender.

“Now, now, let us in, alright?” he laughed nervously. “We came to give Mako-chan a gift!”

“A gift?” asked Ran and Ren, their curiosity evidently piqued. Haru flushed.

“We came to see if he was okay and brought him chocolate,” he forced himself to say, his tone thick. “Since we missed him at practice.”

Ran and Ren turned to each other with gleaming eyes and widening smiles. Rei cleared his throat. The twins blinked up at him.

“I believe you’ll be pleased to know that Haruka-senpai included you in this gesture as well,” Rei told them with a charming smile, his finger pointedly raised for their undivided attention. “Behold! Nagisa-kun, if you would?”

Nagisa giggled as he held out the plastic bag for Rei, opening its mouth as wide as it could go. Rei reached inside, and after some shuffling, he pulled out all two stacks of four chocolate bars each, fanning them out like playing cards. He then pressed his hands close to form a half circle of the eight bars, which he now held out to the children, who stared at him like it was some ingenious magic trick.

“A beautiful presentation improves the eating experience!” declared Rei, ignoring Nagisa’s giggles and Haru’s judgmental glare for stealing the show so wantonly. “Please pick one each. Could you tell us if we made the right choice of flavors for your brother?”

Ren peered at the different flavors, but Ran didn’t even bother to look.

“You can’t go wrong with chocolate! Onii-chan loves them all,” she said at once with a bright grin, and after some careful thought and wrinkling their noses at the more ‘exquisite’ flavors, each picked their safest bet, the plain milk chocolate bars Haru had originally intended for them.

“Thank Haru-chan, okay? It was his idea to get chocolate in the first place,” chimed in Nagisa. Haru flinched, but before he could protest the attention, four thin arms wrapped around his waist, squeezing affectionately until Haru found himself squirming in the twins’ grasp.

“Thank you, Haru-chan!” they cooed in chorus. Haru no longer wanted the show.

“Thank Rei,” he mumbled in embarrassment. The twins turned to grin up at Rei.

“Thank you, Butterfly Onii-san!” they said in a sing song tone. Rei blinked.

“Butterfly… Onii-san…?” he mumbled wide-eyed. Ran and Ren nodded.

“Onii-chan told us you swim butterfly and you even have a legskin with butterflies on it,” explained Ran. “So you’re Butterfly Onii-san!” added Ren.

Rei stared at them with his jaw hanging, but then his features melted like snow, one hand slipping to his glasses with a small push.

“I’m honored..!” he mumbled with a small, bashful smile. Nagisa broke into a relieved grin. He was about to ask the twins what his own name was in Tachibana circles, but before he could so much as open his mouth, Haru cleared his throat to draw the twins’ attention.

“Can we go in now?” he asked in a dull tone, finally reminding the twins of their manners. They gasped, then shuffled backwards to clear the path, giving Rei enough time to return the chocolates to their plastic bag.

“This way, please,” Ran called out to them as she and Ren skipped towards the front door, leading their guests into the house and towards the staircase.

“Ran? Ren?” called their mother from further down the hall, emerging by the staircase a moment later to welcome the guests. The twins waved to her with their chocolate bars in hand. The boys bowed deeply in greeting.

“Good afternoon, Tachibana-san,” said Rei.

“We came to see Makoto,” said Haruka.

“Good afternoon, and nice to see you again, Haru,” replied Makoto’s mother with a soft smile. Haru flushed and lowered his head. She cocked hers. “He’s upstairs in his room.”

“Can we go up too?” asked Ran with a grin, but her mother shook her head.

“Let your brother talk to his friends alone,” she said gently, and deep inside, Haru thanked her from the bottom of his heart.

* * *

Upstairs, Makoto parted with his bed in growing agitation. Having regained consciousness mere minutes ago, he only had enough presence of mind to make his bed, check his room for trash, and clear off his desk, but being pressed for time, he merely tossed everything into his drawers without so much as a glance. His hand twitched hesitantly over a manga that held his fortune from the Misagozaki shrine as its bookmark. Makoto bit his lip in thought, then tossed it inside as well.

Just as he slammed the last drawer shut, there were three knocks on the door to announce his three guests.

“Coming..!” called out Makoto in a strangled tone, brushing a hand down his sides to straighten out his shirt as best he could. He shot one more glance at the desk, just to be safe, then stepped to the door, struggling to keep his breath even.

He slowly pulled the door open, shoulders tensing at the sight of Haru, Rei, and Nagisa crowding in the entrance with flushed cheeks and awkward smiles. Nagisa lifted a hand to wave. Makoto’s own hand twitched upward in reply.

“H-Hi..” he said, his heart pounding under the crumpled shirt. Haru’s lips parted to greet him, but his own words flew into the open as no more than a silent gust of air. Fortunately, Nagisa was loud and forward enough for three combined, since Rei had fallen just as silent as Haruka, staring at Makoto’s shoulder with his brow creased.

“Afternoon, Mako-chan!” said Nagisa cheerfully. “Can we come in?”

“Of course,” mumbled Makoto, visibly shrinking as he retreated from the doorway to let them pass. His guests followed inside, where Rei stepped forward, reaching out a tentative hand.

“Makoto-san, your collar…” he said, gesturing to the right side where Makoto’s collar sagged well below the tie.

“Eh?” blinked Makoto, lowering his head to stare sheepishly at the ruins of his shirt. Haru pursed his lips as he walked over to him before Makoto might protest.

“Here,” he said quietly, reaching out a careful hand to pinch up the collar. He pulled it upward, then pressed it gingerly to Makoto’s neck, ignoring the hot glow of his cheeks and the redness that spread over Makoto’s, but the moment Haru released the fabric, the collar peeled away and flopped down again. Haru tried once more with unchanged results. He frowned. Determined not to be bested by an unruly collar, Haru’s fingers now flicked the tie aside, revealing broken thread where a button should have been. Makoto tensed. Haru’s cheeks paled as their former heat drained away entirely.

“Makoto…” he whispered, his voice low and strained. “Did you..?”

Makoto stared at him for a long moment, then his face gradually fell, confusion giving way to hollow numbness beyond expression. Haru clenched his jaw as he steeled himself against that soft broken smile of his, one that always confirmed his darkest suspicions, but not even a shadow of a smile appeared, as if Makoto had fallen too deep and shattered his last facade. His eyes dulled, but his chest jumped so violently Haru could feel the jolt against the edge of his palm.

“You can say it, Haru,” said Makoto, his voice withered. “I don’t blame any of you for thinking it.”

Haru stared up at him wide-eyed, his chest swelling painfully, but just as he thought fear and agony might strangle his heart, it burst with relief so enormous it sent an invisible weight crumbling from his shoulders. Nothing remained in its wake but an unbearable gladness. What Makoto could not bring himself to express in words, Haru could now read perfectly from his resigned tone, his desolate looks, and the defeated sag of his shoulders: that Makoto had braced himself for blame and reproach he did not deserve. His chest no longer pulsed so violently, indeed seemed to deflate as Makoto waited for the first blow, but Haru’s own heart now fluttered in his throat like a happy humming bird, his lips clamped shut for fear it might soar to the skies if Haru spoke too soon.

 _Of course he didn’t_ , he thought, closing his eyes. _He’s nothing like that._

“Did you get hurt?” he asked when he opened his eyes again, brow creasing in concern, and it was Makoto’s turn to stare in nothing short of shock and disbelief. Haru lowered his eyes, withdrawing his hand. “I didn’t want you to go because I didn’t want you to get hurt.”

Makoto’s jaw dropped in silence, but where he found no words to give, a lopsided smile twitched to life in the corners of his lips, one born of innocence and hope instead of guilt and misery. His eyes gleamed as he took a breath that still brought nothing beyond its warmth as he exhaled it in a relieved sigh. Haru flushed as it grazed the tip of his nose, then spread to his cheeks.

“Idiot… what did you think I was going to say?” he muttered with a mock-stern glare, but before Makoto could thaw enough to laugh or say his name (it was on the tip of his tongue, Haru could almost taste it), Rei and Nagisa stepped closer to make their forgotten presence known again.

“Hurt..?” echoed Rei in a worried tone, his hand twitching to his glasses as he felt them slip down in shock. “Had there been a scuffle, Makoto-san?”

“You’re hurt? You don’t look hurt,” squinted Nagisa as he slipped around Makoto, gave him a glance over, then grasped the hem of his shirt in the back to yank it upward.

“ _Nagisa..!_ ” cried Makoto and Haru, one in embarrassment and the other in warning.

“No injuries here!” came the ready reply. Makoto brought a heavy hand to his face.

“I’m, I’m not hurt,” he mumbled under his palm, shoulders twitching.

“But you did go and see Rin-senpai, Makoto-san?” spoke Rei.

Makoto flinched. He dropped his hand, but a moment later, he merely nodded and entwined his fingers, clasping them firmly together. He glanced to Haru, who bit his lip as he lowered his eyes.

“I told them,” he whispered, his voice thick with guilt. Makoto let out a soft sigh, his shoulders drooping as he turned to face Rei and Nagisa.

“I did,” he replied, and unprompted, he added, “But neither of us got hurt, if you were wondering.”

“If you don’t mind, Makoto-san, could you tell us exactly what happened, and why you decided to go and see Rin-senpai?” asked Rei next, he and Nagisa staring up at him with pleading looks. Makoto swallowed, but closed his eyes with a nod, taking a deep breath to steady himself.

“I went to Samezuka uninvited, and asked to meet Rin by the indoor pool,” he began, his tone drifting into the distance. “I was going to ask him some questions, and I did, but in the end, we both got carried away and said some terrible things we shouldn’t have said, and because of that, he came at me and grabbed my collar. He raised his fist like he was going to punch me, but then he didn’t, and he let go. Then I went home.”

He paused to peer down at Haruka, his brow creasing in guilt. “I’m so sorry, Haru. You were right. I should have gone to practice like you said.”

Haru tensed, his head still lowered. Nagisa reached up a hand just enough to catch Makoto’s attention.

“Mako-chan..” he said, his voice small, “Did you go because of what I said..? About you looking like you wanted to beat up Rin-chan at prefecturals?”

Makoto flinched at the words, and Haru turned to shoot Nagisa a pained glare, but a moment later, Makoto shook his head with a tired, fragile smile.

“No. It wasn’t because of what you said. I think, it’s more like I went to see Rin in spite of it,” he replied. Nagisa and Rei stared at him puzzled. Makoto took a sharp breath.

“I was well aware that going to see Rin would sound like I was just looking for trouble, that I went there because I wanted to provoke him,” he explained, not noticing that turn of Haru’s head, or the way his lips thinned in embarrassment. “I swear I didn’t. I never meant to hurt anyone, and I never meant to cause this much trouble.”

“Then… your reason for seeing Rin-senpai..?” prodded Rei. Makoto tensed.

“I went, because… because I couldn’t take it anymore,” he said quietly as he hung his head. The others exchanged anxious glances. Makoto’s eyes fell to the floor, but he remained as he were, facing towards Rei as if delivering a report to the vice-captain.

“Ever since Kou-chan told us Rin would be in the Samezuka relay, all everyone talked about was how much you looked forward to meet him. That we all had to work harder and I had to start running so we could race Rin properly, and how much you longed to be friends again,” began Makoto, the others fidgeting nervously as their suspicions were confirmed. “I understand that he used to be your friend, and it’s been years since your relay, so of course you’re excited to swim again. _I get that_. But, Rin… ever since joint practice, all I’ve seen is that he’s been downright cruel to all of you. He yelled at you and Nagisa. He is cold to his sister and constantly ignores her. He _hurt_ Haru,” pleaded Makoto, instinctively drawing closer to his friend and brushing against him in the effort.

Haru flushed and turned his head. Rei and Nagisa paled, while Makoto struggled to keep his tone even.

“And I… I wanted to let him know, that I wouldn’t take it anymore,” he continued, his hands curling into fists by his thighs. “I wanted to warn him that he couldn’t do this to any of you and get away with it anymore. I know he and Haru were rivals, but that doesn’t give him the right to treat you like dirt! I don’t even understand! It’s like he forgot how great it is to have _any friends at all!_ ” cried Makoto, his voice jumping a pitch as he unhinged. “Doesn’t he realize how lucky he is to have friends like you?!”

“Mako-chan…” whispered Nagisa. Rei and Haru stared at him bewildered. Makoto colored as he hung his head again.

“I.. I don’t really know how any of you feel about me right now,” he said, his voice still crackling. “But I don’t blame you if you don’t think well of me. I know I’ve failed you a lot, that I hurt Nagisa, that I kept things from you because I was scared you wouldn’t want me on the team if you knew I was afraid of water. I’m so sorry. I never wanted to hurt any of you. I just wanted to be your friend. And once I had nothing to hide, I tried really hard to be the teammate and the friend you deserve. But Rin, he doesn’t try at all! He keeps brushing you off or hurting you like he’s out for revenge or something. _It’s not right!_ ”

“Makoto-san…” mumbled Rei, his eyes gleaming. Makoto’s features numbed again.

“I just wanted to tell him it wasn’t right… to treat my friends that way,” he whispered, his hands now hanging limply.

A long pause. The others looked to each other… and then Nagisa giggled.

“That is just like you, Mako-chan,” he said warmly, stunning Makoto into silence. Rei broke into a smile as he fixed his glasses.

“Very true,” he said with a nod to Nagisa. “A while ago, I told Nagisa-kun that you seem to have a natural tendency to look out for the well-being of others, Makoto-san. It is very noble of you to put the needs of others before your own. In a way, your kindness and loyalty to your friends often remind me of my older brother.”

“Oooh, high praise from Rei-chan!” chimed in Nagisa, putting a flush on Makoto’s pale cheeks. “His brother is his hero, you know.”

“I obviously cannot compare you to Onii-sama, Makoto-san, since he has a very special place in my heart that no one else can ever occupy,” continued Rei with a smile, “but you seem to possess all the good qualities that older brothers should, and I find your efforts to look out for others very admirable.”

“Admirable…” echoed Makoto wide-eyed. Nagisa giggled.

“Yup! All Mako-chan lacks is faith in himself!” he said, wagging a finger at Makoto. “You really need to believe in yourself more, Makoto-chan! If you just keep doubting yourself, you’ll never realize how much we love you no matter what we do.”

“You.. _love me?_ ” mumbled Makoto, as if repeating the words could clear up some obvious mistake with his comprehension. Nagisa giggled and Rei nodded to him with a smile, but Haru glared at Makoto with burning ears.

“Of course, you dummy,” he muttered under his breath. Nagisa hummed.

“We missed you at practice and everyone was worried about you, including Kou-chan, Ama-chan and Goro-chan. Goro-chan was all like, _damn that guy, not taking care of himself with a tournament coming up!_ ” he groused with his arms folded over his chest in a poor imitation of Coach Sasabe. Makoto flushed.

“Everyone was worried about me? I’m s—”

He choked on his words as Haru elbowed him in the side, however lightly.

“Don’t you dare say you’re sorry,” he whispered. Makoto let out a pained laugh as he rubbed at his side. Rei shook his head.

“Haruka-senpai, you are honestly so violent sometimes…” he muttered, then nodded to Nagisa, who finally remembered the plastic bag. He held it out towards Makoto with a grin.

“Here you go, Mako-chan!” he said cheerfully. “We also brought you a gift!”

“A gift…?” mumbled Makoto, staring in awe at the plastic bag. Haru nodded, his eyes large.

“We got you chocolate. You like it, right?”

Makoto laughed sheepishly as he rubbed at the back of his neck.

“I do. I really love sweets, though it’s kind of embarrassing to say that…”

“There’s nothing wrong with sweets,” said Nagisa, fishing out a bar at random to thrust it into Makoto’s hands. “Here, Mako-chan!”

Makoto nearly dropped it in surprise, but after a moment of fumbling, he pinched the bar between his fingers. The cover promised milk chocolate with a caramel filling.

“We each picked two different kinds for your sampling pleasure,” explained Rei. “Haruka-senpai chose caramel and orange, Nagisa-kun picked strawberry and cinnamon, and my personal selection was pistachios and matcha, since your signature color is green… We also gave two chocolate bars to your brother and sister so they would feel included, of which we hope you approve.”

“Thank you…! I hardly know what to say,” blurted Makoto, his cheeks blooming pink as he turned the chocolate bar in his hands, reminding Haruka of how he did the same thing to that plastic container of mackerel in miso ages ago. And to think he had accused Makoto of looking for faults back then, when all he had seen was the novelty of being given a gift…

“Why don’t we share these, since there are so many?” said Makoto next, turning to look from his bed to his desk in search of a good place to lay out all six bars. “I’ll just break them up and then we can all—”

“Nope. All yours,” spoke Haru pointedly, reaching out to take the plastic bag from Nagisa’s hands and holding it up to Makoto. As his friend did not take it immediately, Haru pressed it against his chest.

“Aww,” moaned Nagisa. Haru shot him a glare.

“Now, now, Nagisa-kun,” said Rei with a roll of his eyes. “Haruka-senpai is right.”

Makoto laughed, one hand finally slipping upward to cup Haruka’s lightly so he could take the plastic bag. Haru’s heart skipped a beat as he wiggled his own hand free, letting the bag nestle into Makoto’s palm.

“Thank you again, everyone,” said Makoto, his eyes seeking Haruka’s. They met. Makoto tried for a smile, soft and warm as the first rays of the sun. “All of this… means a lot to me.”

Haru flushed, then turned his head.

“You’re welcome,” he replied, his voice almost a whisper and one hand wringing the thumb Makoto touched.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part of the original note read as follows:
> 
> "[...] this is the last chapter before _When Haru Met Makoto_ 's one-year anniversary! I started writing this story in January, but decided to start posting on my birthday on March 25, and since I won't interrupt the current episode to post any bonus chapters on the date, happy birthday in advance to this story and to me. One year ago, I gifted it to the fandom, and your support has been my birthday gift in return. Thank you, everyone who gave kudos, commented, talked to their friends about it, liveblogged it or recommended it to anyone else: you helped me through a very hard year."
> 
> As the two-year anniversary is coming up, I decided to preserve this part of the original note. My thanks to all of you are still relevant.


	58. EPISODE 11: Desperate All-out! - Part 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As much as they enjoyed indulging Makoto and his siblings, Nagisa and Rei decided not to stay for long. Though their heartfelt words and gift of chocolate seemed to have restored Makoto to his usual good humor, they judged it best to let their friend recover from his tiresome ordeal, and say no more of Rin or tournaments for as long as they could avoid either subject. No more than a week remained until Rei’s butterfly events. For the sake of Makoto’s peace of mind, they could well forgo their conversations of Rin until Rei’s prophecies of their rekindled friendship would come to fruition.

Not even Makoto’s heated tirade of Rin’s crimes, or his evident desire to distance himself from their friend could sway Rei and Nagisa from that sweet promise. Unable to refute Makoto’s words, they simply placed their hopes in the idea that the spark of goodness they still supposed to dwell deep within Rin would flare up during their race… and when the time came, kind, loving, obliging Makoto would yield to his friends’ persuasion to reconcile to Rin at last – and vice versa. Having grown fond of Makoto in the course of spending more and more time together, Nagisa and Rei could no longer choose one over the other, not when Rei owed Makoto the loyalty of a friend and the duty of a vice-captain, and Nagisa found unparalleled pleasure in fostering a bond between Makoto and Haruka, a steady, happy relationship both parties deserved so much.

As for Rei, he resigned himself to merely observing Nagisa’s machinations, and made no more attempts to reason with him beyond the necessary moderation of Nagisa’s wilder schemes. If Haruka’s violent reactions weren’t enough to dissuade him, then Rei could have no objections as long as Nagisa had fun at his own expense. After all, Rei wasn’t blind. He could not bring himself to admit it (mostly because Nagisa’s gloating over him would be never-ending), but he, too, had perceived a peculiar attachment in Haruka, the likes of which Rei had never been privy to in all the years they had known each other. Even now, standing so close together, Haruka wringing his thumb and Makoto smiling at him with the plastic bag cradled to his chest, they seemed to create a small, hermetic bubble around them that Rei felt uncomfortably excluded from.

He gave the enchantment ten seconds to disperse, and when it didn’t, he lifted a hand to his lips and forced a cough. Haru’s brow twitched. He released his thumb at once, while Makoto blinked as though he had been roused from a pleasant daydream.

“Well, Makoto-san,” said Rei with innocent looks and a small push of his glasses, “I think Nagisa-kun and I shall leave you now to enjoy your gift, and we hope we shall see you for practice tomorrow morning…?”

“Tomorrow?” blurted Makoto, evidently confused at the proposal. “I mean… what about this afternoon?”

Haru stared at him surprised. Rei did too, but he shook his head with a warm smile.

“I believe we all deserve some rest, in honor of the end of the first trimester,” he said with another press at his glasses, internally patting himself on the back for the diplomatic reply. He wasn’t called _Ryuugazaki Rei the Negotiator_ for nothing, if only by himself alone. Beside him, Nagisa nodded fervently at his words.

“Yeah, you must be pretty tired from arguing with Rin-chan anyway,” he carried on in Rei’s place, ignoring the gurgling sound Rei made as his careful words were dismantled in an instant. “So you just stay home and rest, okay, Mako-chan?”

Makoto flushed and lowered his head with a guilty frown, which earned Nagisa a sharp glare from Haru, but Nagisa did his best to ignore the silent threat as he skipped forward to grab Makoto’s free hand. He gave it a firm press. Makoto’s fingers hung limply in his grasp.

“Come on, Mako-chan…!” cooed Nagisa in a gentle tone. “You know what I meant…! We just want you to rest and feel better so we can all do our best tomorrow as a team!”

“Y-Yes,” stammered Rei, clearing his throat to steady himself. “After all, we _are_ a team, aren’t we, Makoto-san?”

“Yup! And every member is irreplaceable, Mako-chan!” added Nagisa with a cheerful grin. Makoto stared at him in shock, but then seemed to thaw at those words until he finally lifted his head with a tentative smile. Haru pursed his lips, and after a moment’s hesitation, he drew a little closer to his friend.

“So come to practice tomorrow, okay?” he said in a thick tone, glancing up just long enough to catch Makoto’s eye. Makoto’s smile widened.

“I will,” he said softly. Rei and Nagisa were positively beaming.

“Excellent!” said Rei with a satisfied grin, having so successfully dissolved the tension and restored his teammate’s faith in the swim club. “Well, shall we get going, Nagisa-kun?”

“Okay!” shrugged Nagisa with a cheerful look, giving Makoto’s hand one more squeeze before he released him. Makoto laughed.

“I’ll walk you to the gate,” he said as he unfurled his hand from his chest to plop the plastic bag of chocolates onto the bed, then walked to the door to guide Rei and Nagisa downstairs. Haru hesitated to leave the room, but ultimately tagged along, shuffling behind Nagisa as they proceeded in single file to the front door, where they finally noticed the large fish tank on the top of the entrance hall cabinet. On the way in, none of them dared look around as they followed the twins to the staircase, but now that their anxiety had vanished, Makoto’s home filled with vivid detail, including the four goldfish swimming contentedly in their spacious, well-furnished tank.

“Ah, this looks awesome!” breathed Nagisa as he pressed his nose to the glass. Rei let out a choking sound and hooked a finger into Nagisa’s collar, pulling him away from the tank.

“You’ll leave smudges, Nagisa-kun,” he chided. “But it is true, it looks like an excellent tank, Makoto-san,” he added with a polite smile at Makoto, who grinned at the praise.

“Haru and I chose it together,” he said with a nod to his friend. Haru turned his head.

“Did you name them?” asked Nagisa.

When Makoto nodded, Haru’s eyes drifted back to him with piqued interest.

“The gray one is Haru, the red ones are Rei and Nagisa, and the orange one is Makoto…” said Makoto with tinged cheeks. Rei flushed. Nagisa blinked.

“Eh? How come?”

“The gray one reminded me of the color of Haru’s hair,” explained Makoto with an awkward smile. “The red ones are Rei and Nagisa because they came to Haru’s net as a pair, and they tend to swim together… and I like orange, so that was fine…”

“How can you tell which one’s which, though?” pressed Nagisa, brow furrowed as he scanned for the smallest visible difference between the two red fish. Makoto chuckled.

“You can tell when you feed them. Nagisa swims up first,” he explained. Nagisa let out a moan, but Rei looked thoroughly amused, and Makoto could have sworn that Haru’s turn of the head was to smother laughter.

“Sounds like Nagisa-kun, alright,” said Rei with a smirk. Nagisa puffed his cheeks at him, but Rei merely walked past him to put on his shoes. Nagisa caught his meaning and crouched down to pull on his sneakers. Opposite them, Makoto snuck his feet into a pair of slippers, then offered a guest pair to Haru, who put them on without a word.

“Please convey our regards to your family,” said Rei as they followed Makoto into the yard, where Haru stopped by the grave of the goldfish, crouching down to look at the drooping flowers in the glass bottle. The others marched to the gate, where Rei and Nagisa stepped outside, then turned back to Makoto one more time.

“Goodbye, Makoto-san,” said Rei. “We shall see you tomorrow.”

“Enjoy your chocolates, Mako-chan!” said Nagisa. “It was Haru-chan’s idea, you know,” he added in a hushed tone, dotting his sentence with a wink. Makoto’s eyes widened.

“We originally intended to bring you fruit, since fruit is a customary gift for those feeling unwell,” chimed in Rei, “but Haruka-senpai insisted you would appreciate chocolate more.”

Makoto’s breath hitched. He broke into a sheepish smile.

“I didn’t think he would remember,” he said in a melting tone, “but it’s true. Chocolate is one of my favorite things.”

“That’s Haru-chan for you,” replied Nagisa with a happy grin. “He always seems very distant, but he’s really considerate and nice when he wants to be!”

Makoto turned his head instinctively towards Haruka, who seemed to have caught that mention of his name, and was now glaring at the others from beside the goldfish grave. Nagisa dissolved into nervous giggles.

“Well, time to go, Rei-chan!” he cried as he spun around to make a leap onto the path running by Makoto’s house.

“Wait up, Nagisa-kun!” came the indignant reply as Rei climbed down in proper fashion to join Nagisa, the two of them waving to Makoto on their way downhill. Makoto waved back until Rei and Nagisa disappeared in the bend, then closed the gate and walked over to Haruka, whose fingers teased the wilting heads of the daisies in their glass bottle bath. Makoto crouched down to join him.

“I should change the flowers,” he said quietly. “I usually do it every three days, but I forgot to do it when I came home today…”

Haru hummed. He bit his lip.

“Are you really okay?” he found himself asking, nodding his head towards Makoto’s collar. Makoto’s lips twitched into an embarrassed smile.

“I am, Haru.”

“Will you really come to practice tomorrow?”

“I will.”

“You won’t forget your bag again?” said Haru with a squint. Makoto snorted, then bonked his shoulder against Haru’s in a playful nudge that nearly sent Haru toppling over onto the grass.

“I _won’t_ ,” he drolled. Haru turned his head towards the flowers again.

“Good,” he said in a flat tone, but his shoulder nudged against Makoto’s in return. The other laughed, their sleeves now brushing together. Makoto drew a sharp breath.

“Haru..”

Haru glanced to him, brow quirked.

“Will _you_ be okay, Haru?”

Haru stared at him confused. Makoto tensed.

“You might not be racing Rin one on one, but it will still be a race,” he explained, unable to look at Haruka. “I told him…” He shook his head. “It doesn’t matter. We both got carried away and said a lot of things we shouldn’t have.”

Haru lowered his eyes.

“I don’t really care about the race,” he said at last, believing himself to be truthful to his own state of mind at that moment, with Makoto by his side and a summer breeze caressing his cheeks. “I just want to swim with my friends.”

He did not look, but he could feel the glow of the grin that followed his words.

“Really? I’m glad,” replied Makoto, his tone soft as velvet. “That’s what I want, too.”

Haruka hummed, but as he turned his head, his lips curled into a small, content smile.

“Haru..”

He turned back to face his friend again. Makoto cocked his head.

“Since we’re free for the rest of the afternoon, do you feel like staying for a while?” he asked, his eyes flitting to the grass. “I haven’t had lunch yet, so I thought I’d eat something and then we could play games if you like…”

Haruka flushed, his fingers curling against his palm.

“I don’t know any of the newer games,” he said at last with a troubled frown. “I never really played anything.”

Makoto blinked, but then tilted his head again with tender looks.

“I can teach you,” he replied, and as Haru had no pressing matters to attend to, and no parental phone call to dread, he allowed himself to say yes for a change.

* * *

Back at Samezuka Academy, just as Makoto was boarding the train to Iwatobi Station, Captain Mikoshiba gathered his competitive swimmers for a final time trial before the swim club would officially suspend its usual practice sessions, allowing its members to recover both mentally and physically in time for the regional tournament. Mikoshiba counted them as they lined up, and found his shiver one member short. He furrowed his brow.

“Has anyone seen Matsuoka?” he said out loud. One of the swimmers raised his hand for permission to speak. The captain granted his request with a nod.

“A student from another school came to see him, so he went outside and hasn’t returned,” was the boy’s answer. Mikoshiba quirked his brow in obvious displeasure. A second later, Nitori’s hand shot up in the air with an anxious yelp.

“Matsuoka-senpai might still be outside! I’ll go and look for him!”

“We’ll wait,” replied the captain, and though the words were spoken casually, the steely glint in his eyes made those first in line back off the starting blocks at once.

Aiichiro straightened in a quick salute, then made a dash towards the hallway, soon arriving at the front of the building where he imagined a respectable visitor might call, except he found none, friend or foe, acquaintance or stranger. No one was there except for Rin, who had petrified into a crumbling statue just a few feet away, shoulders hunched and arms hanging like melted wax from a burned out candle. Aiichiro took a step towards him. Rin seemed not to hear his approach.

“Matsuoka-senpai..” spoke Aiichiro, his voice lowered not to startle the other.

Rin tensed at the sound of his voice, his neck creaking as he careened his head to stare at Nitori. His eyes looked as dull as murky glass. Aiichiro straightened and tucked his hands behind his back, his heart thumping under the Samezuka jacket.

“It’s time for our final time trials, Senpai. Everyone is waiting for us.”

Rin’s lips parted, but he made no reply. His world had blurred beyond recognition, reducing Nitori to black and gray smudges, his voice just barely reaching through the fog that clouded Rin’s mind. _An order, from the captain_. Nitori might not have phrased it so – he had an obnoxious tendency to cushion harsh reality with an eiderdown of politeness or meaningless praise –, but it read as a command nonetheless, one that Rin had no choice but to obey if he valued his place on the medley relay team…

He shifted his weight from one foot to the other, then took a tentative step towards Nitori. He half expected to find himself shackled to the ground by his curse, but when his foot swung upward, Rin suppressed a sigh of relief. He took another step, then another, until his rusted motions turned fluid, carrying him past Nitori into the hallway. His kouhai spun around to follow him, soon falling into rhythm by Rin’s side.

“Senpai, may I ask who came to see you?” spoke Nitori after a moment’s pause. Rin’s cheeks prickled as numbness poured over him, his tongue shriveling at the thought of saying _his_ name.

“No one,” he whispered, and when Nitori begged his pardon, Rin clenched his jaw and merely quickened his pace.

* * *

“Ready… Set… _Go!_ ”

Rin launched himself away from the wall into the water, arms milling furiously in a desperate attempt to make his final trial count. To spur himself further, he attempted to imagine some invisible opponent giving it his all in the neighboring lane, but all he saw was a flash of black and green before the pool faded to the ocean. The apparition awaited him by the pier, shifting from that little boy to the full-grown adolescent in his torn Iwatobi High School uniform.

_I just want to swim with my friends._

Rin tensed, his body a coil of rigid wires.

_I want to help Haru heal so he can move on and be happy..!_

He gritted his teeth in wounded anger. _Haru… all everyone ever cared about was Haru._ What about Rin? What about _his_ need to move on?!

 _You were so happy about beating Nanase-san,_ he heard Nitori’s voice in some cobwebbed recess of his mind. _Then you can move on now!_

Rin’s eyes widened and his feet twitched in a rough kick. Foam flickered in his wake as his once smooth progression across the water came to a jarring halt, momentary though it was. Aiichiro and Seijuurou watched on while he recovered for the final spurt, one with a trouble expression, and the other in growing dissatisfaction.

“Matsuoka-senpai seems really off today,” mumbled Aiichiro. Seijuurou turned to him with hardened features.

“Did he say anything to you, Nitori?”

Aiichiro hung his head.

“No. He never tells me anything.”

Seijuurou turned his head, noting with a sour frown that he expected nothing less from the black sheep of the Samezuka swim team. Ever since he told Azuma Yuuki to be on standby, Mikoshiba had been watching Rin’s every move, searching his smallest gestures for anything resembling camaraderie, or genuine interest in his own team’s earnest endeavors. Again and again he was disappointed. Matsuoka dutifully attended every practice and swam with all his might, but his backstroke times now fluctuated at an alarming rate, and Seijuurou could not discern a modicum of attention paid to his teammates. As the first swimmer in line, Rin had to do no more than swim back as fast as possible so the next person could dive in, but while practicing their exchanges had forged the others into a tight, disciplined unit, Matsuoka felt like a loose fourth wheel occasionally swerving off track… and no captain in their right mind would ever allow one man to drag down the entire team in a moment of weakness.

The thought pulled Seijuurou’s brow into a glare. Aiichiro balled his fists.

“ _But,_ ” he began, pressing down on the word to grab his captain’s attention, “I’m sure there’s nothing to worry about!”

Seijuurou turned to him with a curious expression. Aiichiro flashed him a brave smile.

“I’m sure Senpai went through much tougher experiences while he was abroad, so he will prevail no matter what!”

Seijuurou’s eyes drifted to Rin’s silhouette in the water. His lips twisted.

“Has Matsuoka ever told you why he didn’t join the swim team as soon as he transferred?” he asked next. Aiichiro flushed.

“No… he didn’t.”

Seijuurou suppressed a sigh. _Just another mystery on the pile, then._

“Well, the past doesn’t matter,” he said out loud, his eyes following Rin all the way to the starting block. “It’s performance that counts here. The fastest swimmer wins. It’s that simple.”

Aiichiro stared at him alarmed. Beneath the block, Rin punched the water in helpless anger when Nakagawa told him his time.

* * *

An hour later at the dorm, Mikoshiba Seijuurou sank down into the chair by his desk, where he had laid out several charts across the wooden surface: time trial scores for every swimmer on the team. He took a highlighter to mark Matsuoka and Azuma’s names, drawing the pen across the sheet and circling their one-hundred meter backstroke trials. He jotted them down onto another sheet for comparison. He noted their fastest. Their slowest. Their average.

When he was done, he slumped against the backrest with a sigh.

He didn’t have to do it right away. Azuma now practiced for the one-hundred just as rigorously as if his place had been secured once more, and Seijuurou still had a week to see if the approaching tournament, and a week’s stay at the dorm with only swim club members to keep him company might flip some unknown switch in Matsuoka’s mind, sparking the sort of competitive team spirit his captain had been hoping to see. And if it didn’t, then Seijuurou would make his choice and apologize to no one, not even Kou-san.

* * *

That night, Rin had a dream.

_He was back on the pier in his Samezuka summer uniform, caught in that sea of pure white robes and darkened faces once more. Strangers crashed against him in endless waves as his empty hands grasped the air on either side, searching in vain for his little sister. Had the crowd carried her away? Rin’s skin prickled with goose bumps as a hundred sleeves brushed against his naked arms, until that mounting static sparked panic in his heart. Rin whipped up his fists and began shoving the figures aside in a desperate attempt to escape against the flow of the march. As he struggled, a figure swam into his view on the right side: the little boy on the pier._

_Except he was no longer the helpless child Rin remembered. In the span of a single day, he had sprouted legs so long and shoulders so wide he had outgrown those light blue overalls, and now stood there in his high school uniform with its torn collar and that green noose of a tie. Their eyes met like always, but the boy no longer looked horrified. If anything, he appeared disappointed, as if he had grown tired of waiting to be saved._ Ten years… has it really been that long…?

_Rin watched in growing terror as the apparition turned away to leave him behind, one arm slightly extended to the right. A small hand grasped his – a child trying to match his steps as they walked away from the funeral march. His head arched forward, but as though that shapeless child could feel Rin’s eyes, it turned its head to glance at him._

_It was Gou._

_She then turned away and never looked back again._

* * *

_The next night, it was Haru._

_Then Rei._

_And Nagisa._

_On and on, one by one, until Tachibana carried them all away, leaving Rin to drown alone in that never-ending procession of strangers._

* * *

As Rin’s weekend blurred into restless days and haunted nights, Makoto experienced a second spring that took him and his family by pleasant storm. Even his father felt no true disappointment over receiving no apologies from the swim club. Upon being told by a pair of young spies that the boys had brought a gift to his son, and Haru agreed to stay so he could play video games with Makoto, the family collectively agreed to issue Haruka an invitation to dinner as a sign of good will. Haru thanked them, and though he declined with flushed cheeks, it hardly mattered, for Makoto seemed in raptures after having spent several hours introducing Haru to over a dozen different games.

The next morning, they met at the gate so they could walk to practice together, where for the first time in a long while, no one made even a passing mention of Matsuoka Rin. Adamant that they should not fail their friend again, Rei and Nagisa now placed all emphasis on swimming together or simply doing their best for their own sake. This produced immediate and happy effects in Makoto, who now lined up to the block with greater willingness, performed better than before, and when Nagisa claimed him from time to time so they could practice their exchanges together, Makoto’s delight in playing such a vital part in joint practice proved enough to smother all discontent in Haruka. He simply counted the times Rei and Nagisa pulled Makoto away for some friendly one-on-one training, telling himself he would trump them both by staying over at Makoto’s house for thirty minutes for every instance counted, even if the results might force him to sleep over until noon. Not that Haru worried. The bed was big enough for two.

However, the next two days brought no invitations, much less sleepovers. Sasabe insisted they practice no more beyond Sunday afternoon so the boys could rest until the tournament, and since it was the perfect opportunity for a quick briefing, morning practice brought the swimmers unexpected guests in the form of Hanamura Chigusa, and two of her friends from the Craft Club. Chigusa had been at pains to cultivate some moral support for the swim club out of the sheer disinterested kindness of her heart, and thanks to Kou’s booth at the Cultural Festival, some of her friends had finally taken interest in the handsome swimmers. From the moment they took the popularity poll at Chigusa’s suggestion, it was only a matter of time before the idea of attending the tournament to cheer for the boys emerged between them. As Kou had no objections, the three girls joined her to carry the bottled drinks she had brought for the swim club.

Upon their arrival, the unknown guests stationed themselves by the clubroom’s entrance, where they talked in hushed voices and smothered giggles. Chigusa herself settled down by Kou’s side to discuss her brother since the swim club would not, and when practice ended, Ama-chan appeared as well to relate some happy news to the boys.

“If I may have your attention, everyone,” she began with a bright smile as the boys lined up in a row in front of her, “we have some good news for the swim club. Matsuoka-san and I have been hard at work making the most of the swim club’s allotted budget—”

“ _Eeeeh?!_ ” blurted Nagisa wide-eyed. “Nobody told me about a budget!”

“My request for the school board to support the swim club’s attendance at regionals was approved this Friday,” explained Ama-chan with more patience than the unsolicited interruption deserved. “Since the tournament is next Saturday, Matsuoka-san and I decided to make arrangements as soon as possible so you might all concentrate on your training.”

“But I’m the treasurer!” cried Nagisa, pressing his hands to his chest for emphasis. Kou let out a sharp huff as she folded her arms.

“This isn’t something as small as club fees, Nagisa-kun!” she replied indignantly. “A school budget is best left to upper management!”

“Class differences strike again…” muttered Rei.

“We really are the bottom one percent,” moaned Nagisa.

“ _As I was saying_ ,” continued Ama-chan with a stern smile, “Matsuoka-san and I have arranged for your transportation and accommodation for the tournament!”

Nagisa seemed to relent as he and the others exchanged excited glances. Kou herself turned to Chigusa, who now had several stacks of papers in her hands, and took two from the pile of four, each containing itineraries and vital information for next week’s travels.

“We bought you bus tickets so you could leave on Friday morning and arrive in the evening,” she explained as she stepped forward, handing the chosen packets to Haruka and Rei. “You will be staying at Hotel Premium for two nights, since Rei-kun’s butterfly events are on Saturday and the medley relay is on Sunday. You will have to check in on Friday evening and check out on Sunday morning, and then take another bus home when the tournament is over.”

“Is the entire swim club staying for two days?” asked Rei as Nagisa and Makoto received their own stacks. Ama-chan shook her head with a humble smile.

“The school budget is sadly not enough to provide for all of us, so Matsuoka-san and I decided to concentrate on the four of you,” she replied. “After deducting all necessary fees and expenses, the rest will be just enough for the five of us to drive over on the last day and watch you swim the medley relay. …I’m very sorry, Ryuugazaki-kun,” added Ama-chan with a sheepish look. “We would have preferred to watch you swim as well, especially since your individual events had a big impact on the size of our allotted budget.”

Rei shook his head with flushed cheeks.

“Please don’t trouble yourself, Amakata-sensei,” he replied with a smile and a wave of his hand. “You have placed our needs before your own and made all the necessary arrangements in our place, and the swim club is very thankful for your work and sacrifice.”

“And we’ll be there to cheer on Rei-chan in your place!” said Nagisa with a wink. Kou hummed.

“That’s right!” she said with a grin. “So you just do your best, Rei-kun, and then we’ll be there on Sunday with a custom-made Iwatobi High School banner to cheer you on!”

“I’ll be coming, too,” chimed in Sasabe as he walked over from the clubroom freshly changed, though his towel still hung around his neck. “I want to see your training pay off!”

Rei and Nagisa grinned. Makoto tensed, but Sasabe stepped over to slap a hand on his shoulder, hard enough to make him twitch.

“Have more confidence in yourself, Makoto!” he bellowed. “You improved a lot. You’ll do just fine!”

“You heard him, Mako-chan!” giggled Nagisa. Makoto blushed.

“I’ll do my best, to make everyone proud,” he said quietly. Haru sighed.

“We’re already proud,” he mumbled, his voice just above a whisper.

* * *

The rest of their days progressed uneventfully until Friday morning. Having promised Coach Sasabe that they would not swim extensively, each agreed to abandon the pool, then did their best to rest in their own unique ways. Haru confined himself to the bathtub, his bed, and occasionally to Makoto’s room whenever he was invited to play video games with his best friend, drawn first by the novelty of these games, then by the observation that Makoto proved to be a fearsome opponent when the mood struck him so. As for Rei and Nagisa, they spent their days together, all except Thursday evening, when Nagisa was obliged to put up with a nice family dinner in honor of his sixteenth birthday, where all he heard was good wishes mixed with hints that his performance at the regional tournament was of the utmost importance to every member of the family, especially his father. Though every member of the swim club had grown nervous in the wait, none dreaded or longed for the end of the tournament more than Nagisa, who had his heart set on a _real_ birthday party, one with friends and cheerful conversation instead of latent threats that he had better be a man and perform like one.

Not that the tense two hours he spent this way could truly break Nagisa’s fighting spirit. After passing such a long night relatively composed, he could well bear the final horror of double-checking his bags and finding a pink bikini-bottom tucked into his duffel bag. Thankfully, all it did this time was hide his jammers for a last-minute scare, and hold a note attached with string, which said, _Good luck to our little Nagicchi!_ signed with three lipstick smudges from each sister. Nagisa groaned, then tossed the unwanted cargo under the bed. Leave it to his sisters to send him off in as much discomfort as his small frame could contain.

* * *

At least nothing but friendly faces awaited Nagisa at Iwatobi Station, where everyone arrived fully packed and ready to face their challenges. To send them off, Coach Sasabe, Ama-chan, Kou, Chigusa, and her two friends all lined up in front of the station, the latter five holding up a huge painted banner the girls had made in their spare time to pledge their unwavering support. A painted sun blared over bright blue waves that screamed in bold letters, _Fire it up!! Iwatobi Swim Club – Persevere!_

“Well, I’ve taught you everything I know!” bellowed Sasabe with his fist thrown into the air. “All that’s left is for you to do your best!”

“Fire it up!” cried Nagisa, his fist thrown in the air. Rei narrowed his eyes in disdain.

“That banner is really embarrassing,” he muttered under his breath, which finally caused Makoto and Haru to take a better look at it. Haruka’s eyes widened.

“That drawing…” he blurted, pointing at a black and white sketch of Iwatobi-chan in the bottom right corner. Nagisa gasped.

“Oh! It’s the one Haru-chan drew for our uniforms!” he said with a bright grin.

“I didn’t think it’d be used for this,” mumbled Haruka, quirking a sharp brow at Kou, who had nicked the sketch from the club room as ‘inspirational material’ for the Craft Club.

“Well, we’ll head up there on Sunday morning,” said Ama-chan with a smile.

“Please get plenty of rest at the hotel, especially Rei-kun,” added Kou. Rei nodded with a grin. Ama-chan cleared her throat with a small cough.

“The Roman general Caesar said it best,” she continued as she lifted a stern finger. “If we cross, we will wreak tragedy upon the world. If we do not—”

“Oh, it’s our bus!” interrupted Nagisa as their transportation pulled up behind them.

“We’re off! See you soon, everyone!” said Rei in a deep bow to their supporting cast, who waved with cheerful smiles as the four of them boarded, then settled in the back, waving back from the windows until Iwatobi Station and its happy crew shrank into the distance.

* * *

At the same time the Iwatobi Swim Club boarded their bus, a large rental bus waited at Samezuka Academy for the swim club to board. Rin was one of the last to head down in shuffling steps, twitching to a halt as he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. He pulled it out to check his messages.

_From: Matsuoka Gou_

_Best of luck to both sides, Onii-chan! Let’s go to nationals!_

Rin’s eyes dulled as his thoughts reeled back to Tachibana by the indoor pool.

_You are horrible to your sister, who loves you and cares about you! How dare you?_

His hand trembled, his thumb hovering over _Reply._

“What’s wrong, Senpai?” came Nitori’s voice from behind him. Rin tensed and tucked his phone away.

“Nothing,” he said in a thick tone – his one and only answer to everything since last Friday.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A group of sharks is called a shiver. Now you know!


	59. FrFr! - Haruka Daydreams!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The April Fool's chapter, now with its proper title and forever wedged into Episode 11.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Monday, July 29, 2013.**

_They were undressing in the clubroom, Haruka already clad in jammers while Makoto was still putting his legskin on, pulling it with gentle force up his thighs and over the firm arches of his hips._

_“Makoto…” spoke Haruka, ignoring the heat coiling up his neck._

_“Yes, Haru?” Makoto turned to him with a smile. Haru forced himself to look him in the eye, his hands clenched by his sides._

_“Notice anything different?”_

_Makoto paused, brow furrowed as he cupped his chin, then let his eyes wander up and down Haruka’s slender frame._

_“No… you look the same as yesterday.”_

_Haru pursed his lips._

_“I’m wearing a new swimsuit.”_

_“Eh?” blurted Makoto, shock soon giving way to diplomatic smiles. “Ha ha… Sorry, Haru. I didn’t notice at all. All your swimsuits look pretty alike to me.”_

_“This one’s different,” insisted Haruka. “Even the fabric is different.”_

_“Really?” marveled Makoto. Haru nodded, his expression guarded as he tucked a finger into his jammers, then tugged the hem away from his hip, just enough to offer it to the other._

_“Feel it,” he said to Makoto. “What material do you think it is?”_

_Makoto bent down as he carefully pinched the hem between his fingers, rubbing circles over the fabric with his thumb._

_“Um… spandex?” he risked with a  glance to Haru, who narrowed his eyes as he whispered,_

_“Boyfriend material.”_

_Makoto lifted his head to stare back. Haru gave him a serious nod._

_Makoto’s jaw dropped._

_“You’re right, Haru…!” he cried, releasing the hem so he could sweep Haru off his feet, hugging him bridal style to his chest. “How could I have been so blind…!”_

_“Because you’re an idiot,” muttered Haruka, but he wrapped his arms around Makoto’s neck and pressed against him cheek to cheek all the same. “Let’s go.”_

_Makoto hummed. He smelled like ocean waves crashing down on the sand._

_“We’ll ride off into the sunset now,” he breathed in a husky tone, cradling Haru to his chest as he carried him to the pool, where Rei and Nagisa had morphed into a butterfly-winged Pegasus. It was wearing a pair of swimming goggles over its eyes, the strap serving as the reins that were presently being held by an armor-clad Kou. Makoto took the reins from her gauntleted hand._

_“Farewell, Makoto-senpai, Haruka-senpai!” she waved as Makoto and Haru rode off into the sunset, sailing away on the wings of the legendary Reigisa…_

_“Haru,” spoke Makoto. Haru leaned closer. “Haru…”_

“Haru..!”

Haruka’s eyes shot open. He was standing in the clubroom, still in his unzipped trousers and unbuttoned shirt, while Makoto had already finished changing, and Rei and Nagisa had long left for Rei’s usual warm-up.

“Are you alright, Haru?” asked Makoto, his brow creased. Haru flushed and turned his head.

“I’m fine,” he mumbled as he tugged down his trousers, racking his mind in vain for the strange daydream that Makoto’s voice sent fleeing from his mind.


	60. EPISODE 11: Desperate All-out! - Part 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once Iwatobi Station disappeared from view, leaving the boys with no one to wave goodbye to, Rei shuffled past his friends to secure the first window seat within reach, pulling down the window to let in a faint but steady breeze. Haruka followed suit to occupy the window seat in the next row, while Makoto simply turned around and lifted his luggage, stuffing it with ease into the overhead compartment just above Haru. He then bent down to his friend to offer his services, but before Makoto could speak a syllable, a shaky blob swam into the corner of his vision, Nagisa visibly struggling to lift his own bag high enough. Makoto suppressed his laughter and plucked the bag from Nagisa’s hands, tucking it into the compartment above Rei’s seat. Nagisa thanked him with a sheepish grin. Makoto cocked his head in reply, then turned to Haruka once more.

“Haru..” he said gently to the other, whose eyes had since drifted to the verdant blur of trees by the roadside. Haru turned his head slightly. Makoto smiled as he extended his hands towards the luggage Haru had conveniently parked on the seat next to him. “Shall I put your bags away?”

Haru blinked, then hummed in agreement.

While Makoto picked up his larger bag to put it away above, Haruka fished out a bottle of water from his smaller bag, pushing it down the seat net in front of him as Makoto cleared away the other bag.

The moment he managed to put it away, he heard a small cough from the corner.

“Makoto-san… if you would be so kind…” came Rei’s voice from behind the bag that he now held up towards Makoto, who hummed good-naturedly as he took it from Rei’s hands.

“Of course,” he replied as he placed Rei’s luggage next to Nagisa’s, who was finally free to plop down on the seat next to Rei. Makoto turned back to Haru at last, settling into the now empty seat beside him.

His friend was staring blankly into the distance, his hands clasped in his lap. Makoto bit his lip, but after a moment of hesitation, he lifted a hand to his lips and cleared his throat. Haru turned to him again with surprised looks. Makoto flashed him an apologetic smile.

“Are you alright, Haru?” he asked gently. Haru’s eyes wavered.

“I’m fine,” he replied, one thumb rubbing against the other for a moment before Haru went on to add, “I don’t like travelling.”

“Do you get carsick?” asked Makoto, unaware that behind him, Rei had just taken his first mint to ease his breathing and soothe his wobbly stomach.

“Not really,” replied Haruka. “It’s just boring.”

Makoto laughed.

“Well,” he began as he reached into the shoulder bag perched on his feet, pulling out a stack of booklets, “if you feel like busying yourself, maybe we could check out these brochures Kou-chan gave us. They have information on the city, the hotel we’re staying at and even the pool we’ll be swimming in,” explained Makoto. “If we go through all of these, it should tide us over for the first few hours.”

Haru couldn’t help but shrug at the lackluster appeal of travel brochures, but after a moment’s pause, his shoulder bonked against Makoto’s arm as he leaned closer for a better look. Makoto held out the book for their viewing pleasure, then read out the first paragraph of the introductory brochure, keeping his voice low not to disturb the others. At first, Haru occasionally hummed to encourage him, even leaning a little closer to look at pictures Makoto pointed out to him, but after a while, that soft, sleepy voice lulled him into a mellow drowsiness that begged him to close his eyes, just for a little while…

Haruka nodded off sometime after a bland description of the hillside with its lookout points and dozen windmills, one hand curled loosely around his half empty water bottle and his head resting on Makoto’s shoulder.

Unfortunately, his nap did not last long. He was roused most unpleasantly by a strangled cry from behind, then by the dull pressure of an elbow weighing down on the top of his head as Nagisa plopped on the backrest between him and Makoto, one hand slipping forward to hold out a plastic packet.

“Pretz, anyone?” he said in a muffled voice, one stick of Pretz hanging from the corner of his lips like a cigarette. Haru quirked his brow, but carefully pulled out a stick, which had a suspiciously red coat scattered with green shavings. Just watching him put that thing anywhere near his mouth made Makoto nauseated. He broke into an uncomfortable grin as he careened his head to face Nagisa.

“What was that noise just now..?” he asked nervously. Nagisa shrugged.

“It was Rei-chan. Why?”

Next to him in the corner, Rei continued to gurgle helplessly, praying for the sweet release of death as the flavors of the Vinegar Seaweed and Ketchup Pretz mingled with the icy burst of the mint Rei choked on and swallowed whole when Nagisa jammed an entire stick of that abomination in his mouth.

* * *

Nagisa’s playful and inadvertent attempt on Rei’s life, while entirely uncalled for, did start a small avalanche of more interesting events. By the time they managed to stabilize Rei, the bus pulled into its first scheduled stop, where the driver announced a thirty-minute break, just enough time for the swim club to hurry down into the nearest restaurant and slurp up as much udon as possible, which in Nagisa’s case meant four bowls compared to one bowl for everyone else. They then rushed back onto the bus, throwing themselves into their seats just as the driver closed the doors, announcing that their next stop would be in another three hours. Haruka sighed. Makoto smothered his laughter.

“Would you like some music, Haru?” he asked as he produced an iPod and a pair of earbuds from his shoulder bag. “We could listen together.”

Haru hesitated.

“There’s only one pair…” he mumbled, pointing to the earbuds Makoto had connected to the iPod, then divided so he could place the right one in his ear.

“That should be enough, since we sit so close,” he replied as he offered the earbud to Haru, who paused for a moment before he combed his tufts behind his ear, dropping his hands in his lap right after. Makoto waited a moment more, then leaned over with Haru’s implied permission, his own cheeks tinged pink as he gingerly placed the earbud into Haru’s reddening ear.

“There,” he whispered, then pressed _Play_ , unleashing the mellow beat of a cheerful pop song in Haru’s ear. Makoto tried for a smile. Haru hummed, then turned his head ever so slightly to the window, for fear he would not be able to stare into those large, green eyes for much longer.

Makoto eventually fell asleep, as did Nagisa and Rei, leaving Haru to stare out the window in lonely reverie, occasionally wondering if Rin, too, was on his way by now to some hotel in the city, doomed to a day of idling about until his freestyle event.

In the distance, drifting down a different road, Rin wondered the same, hoping their paths would not cross until the relay. Once the boy on the pier had carried everyone away, Toraichi returned to haunt Rin’s dreams in his place, forcing Rin to seek relief in intense training that left him drained by evening and snuffed out his dreams like a meager flame. Each day, he repeated the treatment. Each night, it brought him heavy, empty sleep, yet in every waking moment, his thoughts continued to revolve around Tachibana, Haru, and the others. The desire to just get it all over with now itched like a shell of dry skin Rin desperately wanted to shed. Sometimes he even feared others could see it when Rin had been struggling to hide his misery. The captain and the majority of the swim team went away for their final week of resting, but others remained, and each time they crossed paths, Rin shrank from them bitterly. In the week he spent at the dorm, he spoke to no one except Nitori, and even there he carefully sifted his words.

Once the relay was over, everything would change. That was what Rin promised himself as he stared out the window into the sunset, his mind’s eye seeking some non-descript bus with his former friends and the ghost on it. Once Rin won the relay, everything would change. All he had to do until then was avoid the others, then overpower Tachibana at their race. If the ghost was right and Rin had truly failed in all other capacities, he would at least show them that he remained unparalleled in swimming. After all, what else did he need on his lonely track to the Olympic stage except hard work?

A competition admitted no friendship. There were only rivals and enemies.

Perhaps, once he won, Rin would finally accept that.

* * *

Evening fell by the time the Iwatobi Swim Club arrived in the city, where they were left to find Hotel Premium on their own and register as soon as possible. Having since gone through all the brochures and maps attached, Makoto offered to navigate, which the captain and vice-captain graciously accepted. With Makoto’s help (and none from Nagisa, who got distracted several times and stressed Rei to no end), they eventually arrived to the hotel, which was supposedly within a ten-minute walking distance from the stadium.

By the time they reached the front, Nagisa wilted considerably, while Haru was on the verge of dehydration. Even Rei and Makoto were showing signs of fatigue, but even so, Rei had enough presence of mind to observe decorum. He cleared his throat, then proceeded to say,

“Haruka-senpai, as captain, you should lead us inside.”

Haru sighed, but he nonetheless shuffled in front of Rei, leading his friends single file to the registration desk. The hotel lobby was practically empty except for the receptionist, who looked away from her monitor to flash the group a smile.

“May I help you?” she asked as she tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. Rei stepped forward to take Haruka’s side and fixed his glasses.

“We have a reservation for the Iwatobi Swim Club,” he declared proudly, ignoring the way Haru glared and turned his head at the thought of having been unnecessarily ordered to the front if Rei was going to upstage him either way. The receptionist quirked a brow. She turned to her computer, checked the hotel records, then flashed Rei a thin smile.

“Identification, please,” she replied calmly.

Rei gasped. He pulled out his wallet with a string of sheepish apologies, so the others followed suit, each holding out their ID cards to the receptionist until she typed in their names, then nodded in the affirmative.

“Your payment was completed in advance,” she informed them, at which point Rei murmured a short, thankful prayer to Kou-san and Amakata-sensei. “Your rooms are on the fourth floor. Four-oh-one and Four-oh-two, just opposite each other at the end of the hall. Please tell me who will be staying in which room, so I may assign your keycards.”

Haru’s lips parted to speak. Nagisa’s hand swung upward.

“I’m staying with Mako-chan!” he cried, drowning out the captain’s quiet request.

Makoto blinked. Haruka glared. Rei huffed indignantly.

“Nagisa-kun, didn’t we agree beforehand that we would share a room?” he griped. Nagisa’s brow arched pitifully as he stared back at him.

“But you and Haru-chan both got to be with Mako-chan before!” he whined, failing to notice how Makoto colored as he held up his hands apologetically to the receptionist. “I’m the only one who hasn’t!”

“Not true,” muttered Haruka. “You slept next to him that night on Sukishima.”

“But you were all there so that doesn’t count..!” moaned Nagisa. Haru’s eyes narrowed.

“As captain, _I_ will decide,” he said solemnly, turning from Nagisa to Makoto with guarded features. “Makoto.”

“Yes, _Captain?_ ” came Makoto’s reply, half playful, half embarrassed, and completely devastating to any composure Haru feigned to have in front of Nagisa and Rei. His chest erupted with heat that scorched his cheeks red, eyes growing blank as Haru turned to the receptionist like a rusted robot, then lifted an equally stiff hand.

“Us two,” he poked a finger in Makoto’s direction. “And them,” the finger turned towards Nagisa and Rei. Nagisa puffed his cheeks.

“Haru-chan is abusing his club privileges again,” he muttered under his breath as he folded his arms over his chest. Rei allowed himself a small cough.

“He certainly _reminds me of_ _someone_ when he does that,” he said with a meaningful squint in Nagisa’s direction. Nagisa pretended that remark didn’t happen. The receptionist pretended the entire conversation didn’t happen except for Haruka’s directions, which allowed her to sort the four registered guests into their rooms and finally issue their keycards.

“Nanase-san and Tachibana-san have been assigned to Room Four-oh-one,” she informed them with a smile. “Hazuki-san and Ryuugazaki-san are assigned to Room Four-oh-two. Breakfast is included. Enjoy your stay.”

“Thank you,” replied the others with a bow.

With their accommodations sorted, they proceeded to the elevator next, squeezing into it with everyone’s luggage. Nagisa sank into a corner while the others stood, letting out a yawn that proved contagious, but once they arrived in front of their respective doors, even he seemed to perk up when everyone tested their keycards, and found them in perfect working order. The moment Rei pushed the door open, Nagisa rushed inside, throwing himself onto the bed of his choice. Rei groaned as he followed him, nodding goodbye to Makoto and Haruka.

“We shall see you shortly, Haruka-senpai, Makoto-san.”

“Alright,” replied Makoto, waiting for Rei to close the door. He and Haru now stood alone in the hallway. Makoto flushed.

“Haru..” he said quietly. Haru hummed. “Thank you,” continued Makoto with a slight scratch of his cheek. “As much as I like Nagisa, I did hope I would get to share a room with you…”

Haru swallowed, his skin breaking out in sweat as if the air around him turned into steam.

“You’re welcome,” he mumbled in a thick tone, turning from Makoto to the door. He dragged his keycard down, pushed the door open, and the moment he threw down his bags in the hall, he headed into the bathroom without another word to splash cold water over his face. Makoto proceeded to the beds and sank down on the nearest one, dropping his luggage onto the floor by his feet.

“Man… I didn’t see even a single guest anywhere,” he said out loud with his head turned towards the bathroom. “It feels like we’re all by ourselves in this place. It makes me kind of nervous…”

In the bathroom, Haru lifted his head to look at his reflection in the mirror. His front bangs now glistened wet, dripping water down his cheeks and the ridge of his nose, but he did at least manage to subdue the redness of his cheeks. He let out a loud hum in reply, then straightened, taking deep breaths. His chest felt strangely tight, his heart nestled in its nest of ribs like a small, frightened animal. Haru scolded himself as he dug into his bag for his towel. What was he even afraid of..? _It’s just Makoto…_

He took another breath, then stepped out of the bathroom, leaning against the wall with the towel hung from his neck and his front bangs conspicuously wet. Makoto broke into a sheepish smile.

“Is it okay if I take this bed?” he asked, patting the blanket beside him. Haru hummed. His eyes drifted to his own bed, then back to Makoto.

His friend inhaled sharply. Haru’s heart skipped a beat.

“Haru..”

Haru hummed to encourage him, eyes large. Makoto took another breath.

“I—”

 _Bam, bam, bam_ , came three hard knocks on the door, snapping Makoto out of his thoughts. His words turned into empty vapor. Haru suppressed a groan.

 _Haru-chan! Mako-chan!_ came Nagisa’s voice from beyond the wood. Haru pursed his lips tightly as he walked over to the door, then pressed down on the handle. Rei and Nagisa smiled at him unabashedly from the hallway, either oblivious of their horrible timing, or absolutely relishing it. Haru wasn’t sure anymore.

“Are you two ready to go?” asked Nagisa with an innocent grin. Haru quirked his brow.

“We would like to go out for dinner, to celebrate our arrival,” added Rei. “Any suggestions?”

Haru turned back to Makoto, who gave the underside of his chin a thoughtful scratch.

“If I remember correctly, Kou-chan marked some restaurants for us in the brochures,” he said at last with a smile. “There should be one just around the corner that offers traditional meals at a discount for students.”

Haruka shrugged, but Rei nodded in approval. Nagisa broke into a grin.

“Traditional meals it is!” he cheered with his hands thrown into the air. His stomach growled something fierce. Nagisa slapped his hands over it. “I’m starving, so hurry up, _hurry up!_ ”

“We’re coming, we’re coming!” laughed Makoto, pushing himself away from the bed. He stretched his arms, then cocked his head with a sheepish smile at Haruka, who huffed and pulled the towel from his neck to bury his face in it, wondering what Makoto wanted to say before Nagisa interrupted him.

* * *

After a quick peek at the brochure in question, Makoto offered to guide his friends out of the hotel and around the corner, where they found the promised restaurant by its flashing neon sign, which promised _Traditional Meal Specials_ at reasonable prices. The counter was unoccupied, so the boys settled down in front of their chef for the night, pulling the laminated menu into the center so everyone could see.

“Is there a daily special?” asked Makoto. Nagisa’s finger grazed the plastic.

“Yup! The pork tenderloin cutlet bowl!” he replied. Makoto hummed.

“I think I’ll go with the tenderloin, then.”

“Me too!” said Nagisa, his hand shooting into the air to grab the chef’s attention. “Two tenderloin cutlets!”

“Got it, two tenderloin cutlets,” replied the chef without so much as looking. Haru leaned over to look at the menu, his practiced eyes scanning for his favorite. He wasn’t disappointed.

“Mackerel in miso,” he told the chef.

“Got it, one mackerel,” came the prompt reply. Makoto laughed.

“Knew you’d pick that, Haru-chan!” giggled Nagisa. Beside him, Rei furrowed his brow at the wide selection, cupping his chin in deep thought at the best possible choice for someone competing the very next day.

“I’m thinking the hot pot or pork tenderloin cutlet bowl with ankake sauce,” he mused out loud to the others in the hopes of receiving potential input. “Hm, or maybe the chilled cutlet udon…”

“One hot pot, one ankake, one chilled cutlet udon,” they heard the chef say. Rei let out a shriek.

“You’ve got it wrong! I wasn’t placing an order yet!” he cried red-faced as the entire counter dissolved in laughter, Haru turning his head away from the others to Makoto when he could no longer smother his own, to let it out where he felt it safest.

* * *

“Ah, that was good!” sighed Nagisa contentedly as they walked out after their meal. Rei’s sigh rang heavier as he placed a hand over his stomach.

“I had too much to eat,” he concluded, hoping fervently that none of it would turn into lead tomorrow and pull him to the bottom of the pool on his first event. While he pondered the chances of such a disaster happening, a group of four students passed by on the opposite side of the street.

“Practice was crazy today!” they head one of them say. “Brutal!” replied another.

Nagisa’s eyes widened in excitement as he turned to prop his hands on the railing.

“Hey, do you think those guys are going to be in the tournament tomorrow?” he said to the others as he stared after the four boys. “What if they end up in the lane next to us?”

Invited by Nagisa’s query, the others turned to look as well, but after a moment’s observation, Rei folded his arms and turned to Nagisa with a sullen expression.

“They’re probably just ordinary students at a local high school,” he replied indignantly. “After all, they aren’t built like swimmers at all.”

“You sound like Kou-chan,” giggled Nagisa, not noticing how Makoto blinked at Rei’s words and promptly checked his watch.

“Speaking of swimmers,” he said to his friends with a smile, “why don’t we go and check out the pool? It should only be ten minutes away from where we are.”

Rei and Nagisa stared at him surprised, and Haru, outright shocked, but after a moment, everyone nodded in agreement. Rei in particular looked extremely pleased.

“What an excellent idea, Makoto-san,” he said with a wide smile, causing Makoto to blush above his grin. “I think a walk there and back to the hotel would be the perfect way to wind down before we sleep.”

“Do you know the way?” asked Haru cautiously. Makoto nodded.

“Follow me,” he said obligingly, and the others followed with eager faces.

* * *

Unfortunately, Makoto had lost track of time despite his precise knowledge of walking distances, and so ended up leading his team to a closed area with a sign that read, _Only authorized personnel allowed_. The front they stared down in growing despondence was now empty save for a few employees locking doors and setting alarms.

“No luck,” moaned Nagisa. Makoto checked his watch again, then rolled his eyes at his own sad oversight.

“I guess it’s too late.”

“This isn’t going to happen, then,” sighed Rei with a heavy heart.

“Wait,” spoke Haruka for the first time since they left the restaurant. The others stared at him wide-eyed. “We might still be able to see the pool,” Haru told them, turning to Makoto with a hopeful expression. “Makoto told me there was a lookout point uphill.”

Makoto stared at him surprised, but his face soon lit up in a happy glow.

“That’s right!” he replied, his relief so profound it pulled Haru’s lips into a barely noticeable smile. “It was in the brochures! If we go down this street and head straight on, we should arrive at the foot of the hill. I guess that’s a little further away, though…”

“Then we had better hurry up!” cried Nagisa, breaking away from them into an excited dash, in the direction Makoto had pointed them just moments ago.

“ _W-Wait up, Nagisa-kun!_ ” cried Rei as he chased after him. Makoto laughed and shook his head.

“Shall we go, Haru?” he turned to his friend with a tilt of his head. Haru hummed, his lips twitching into another small smile as the two of them headed after Nagisa and Rei at a leisurely pace, their sleeves occasionally brushing together.

* * *

When Rei finally managed to catch up to Nagisa and detain him, Makoto assumed the lead all the way to the foot of the hill, where Nagisa decided he could no longer be contained and broke into a sprint up the stone steps towards the lookout point, with Rei chasing after him once more. Even Makoto quickened his pace, but when he realized that Haru still struggled, Makoto climbed down to him, waiting until Haru composed himself enough to walk.

“Hurry up, guys!” cried Nagisa in the distance, but no persuasion of his could sway anyone else to run except for Rei.

“It’s not safe to run around in the dark, Nagisa-kun!” they heard him shout, to no avail. Makoto chuckled.

“Where does Nagisa get all that energy from…” he said to Haru with an amused smile. Haru let out a small huff.

“You say that, but you could have outrun him easily,” he said with a hint of pride. Makoto flushed.

“Maybe,” he allowed with a grin. Haru shook his head with a defeated sigh, but he argued no more, letting Makoto guide him in the darkness until the muted blues and greens of the city lent a soft turquoise glow to the stretch of sky beyond the railing.

There they found their friends standing side by side in perfect silence, and when Makoto and Haru joined them, the vista stunned them equally breathless. Below, in the confines of its metal walls and glass ceiling lay the largest indoor pool they had ever seen. The reflectors shining upon its pristine water bathed the entire structure in an unearthly glow, washing over the buildings that surrounded the stadium on all sides. Flecks of neon greens and pinks blinked in the distance like manmade stars, paving a trail of light to the black silhouettes of nearby hills. A sky full of stars shimmered above in celestial competition, as if jealous of its earthly rival.

“Wow…” breathed Makoto in awe.

“It’s big,” whispered Haruka.

“I will be swimming in that tomorrow,” mumbled Rei, his eyes glistening at the thought, and for the first time, Makoto was able to understand, even share his excitement at the sight of that magnificent pool, conveyed by the hang of his jaw and the faint color of his cheeks.

He was roused from his thoughts by a shiver. It was Haruka, who had wrapped his arms around himself instinctively as fatigue caught up to him at last.

“Are you cold, Haru?” he asked in a worried tone. Haru blinked sleepily.

“Yeah,” he said quietly, watching in something akin to comfort as Makoto’s hands slipped to the tied sleeves of the Iwatobi Swim Club jacket around his waist, untangled the knot, then lifted the jacket to drape it over Haru’s shoulders. Haru hummed in thanks as he pulled the hems close together. Makoto tried for a soothing smile.

“It’s getting pretty late,” he hazarded to say, causing Nagisa to yawn. Rei nodded.

“Let’s head back to the hotel, everyone,” he replied with a nod at the steps. Nagisa flashed him a drowsy grin, then put an arm around Rei’s shoulders.

“Yeah, Rei-chan has a big day tomorrow!” he added with a wink. Rei raised his hands defensively.

“Please don’t remind me, Nagisa-kun,” he mumbled with an anxious frown. Makoto laughed.

“Let’s go, then. We could all use some rest,” he said with a fleeting glance to Haruka, who had since put his arms in the sleeves and buried his face in the collar that smelled faintly of Makoto and the ocean.

* * *

By the time they reached the hotel again, everyone had fallen silent. Nagisa dragged his feet, Rei kept suppressing one yawn after another, and Haru occasionally closed his eyes, letting himself be guided solely by the sound of the others’ footsteps. Only one thing kept him awake by now, his modestly burning curiosity regarding Makoto’s earlier attempt to tell him _Something Important_. When they reached the hallway, he merely nodded to Rei and Nagisa before he shuffled into his room, and by the time Makoto came inside after a proper round of good nights to their friends, Haru was sitting on the edge of the bed in his pajamas, hands in his lap and one foot propped on the other on the floor.

“Makoto.”

“Hm?” replied the other as he pulled out that now familiar yellow and orange shirt from his duffel bag. Haru bit his lip.

“What were you going to say?”

“Eh?” blinked Makoto. Haru closed his eyes in a pained blink.

“Before Rei and Nagisa came over. You wanted to say something.”

Makoto paused, then melted into an awkward smile.

“Ah, ha ha, I did… but now I can’t remember what it was…” he stammered, one hand scratching at the back of his head. “Sorry, Haru…”

Haru pursed his lips in disappointment, but when Makoto showed no signs of trying to jog his memory in the five seconds Haruka was willing to wait, he burrowed under the sheets without another word. He curled up in the middle, facing away from Makoto.

“Good night,” came the other’s voice from behind him, soft and remorseful. Haru sighed.

“Night,” he muttered in reply, struggling to fall asleep until Makoto’s breathing turned even and peaceful on the other bed that now felt a hundred miles away.

* * *

The next morning, everyone showered in turns, put on their Iwatobi Swim Club tracksuits, then met at the hotel restaurant for breakfast at seven o’clock sharp, leaving them enough time to eat a leisurely meal before registration would begin. They arrived some time after eight, but spent almost an hour in line all the same, as some schools had brought nearly thirty students compared to their measly count of four. Nevertheless, they saw nothing of Samezuka Academy while they waited, which Makoto acknowledged with gladness, and the others, with varying degrees of disappointment.

“I don’t see Rin-chan anywhere,” moaned Nagisa. Rei fixed his glasses.

“Samezuka Academy probably came here earlier than we have, Nagisa-kun,” he said sternly. “A prestigious swimming school of their caliber could never afford to be late! The opening ceremony is about to start, after all!”

“Alright, alright,” Nagisa hushed him with a troubled smile. Behind them, Haru stared pointedly at a group of black-clad students that first gave the impression of Samezuka swimmers, but turned out to be students from another district. Makoto sighed, but forced a smile.

“Rin might already be inside,” he said gently, and the moment he did, Haru’s shoulders visibly relaxed.

* * *

Makoto was indeed correct. Matsuoka Rin stood in line for registration as early as six thirty at Mikoshiba Seijuurou’s command, then endured the soul-crushing boredom that was the opening ceremony with everyone else. Afterwards, he could even be prevailed upon to sit at their reserved seats on the spectators’ balcony, glaring in morose silence as his teammates cheered for their backstroke and breaststroke swimmers. However, just ten minutes before the butterfly events were to begin, Rin excused himself and disappeared to avoid Rei’s race, caring little that in the process, he also ended up missing Kawamura Tetsuo’s one-hundred meter butterfly, thus snubbing one of his three teammates on his very last day to prove himself worthy of being in the relay. Seijuurou noted his absence with darkened looks, and when Azuma Yuuki glanced over to him to confirm his own suspicions, Mikoshiba allowed himself the smallest nod in his direction.

As for Nitori, he tried and failed repeatedly to excuse his senpai’s disappearance, achieving nothing beyond earning Seijuurou’s reluctant regard as the most supportive member of the swim club, whose kindness and efforts could not have fallen on a less deserving recipient.

* * *

Rei at least suffered from no lack of supporters. His team was with him till the last moments of his departure for the pool, and by the time he stepped onto the block, everyone gathered by the railing, ready to cheer him on in enthusiasm fit for twice their number.

_Ready… Set… Go!_

“Go, go, go, go, go, go, Rei(-chan)! Swim, swim, swim, swim, swim, swim, Rei(-chan)!” cheered the Iwatobi Swim Club as Rei launched forward and entered the water with a series of rapid kicks, flying on the wings of his friends’ fervent cries of his name.

Nevertheless, all the cheers in the world could not curb his fearsome competition this time. A few swimmers pulled ahead well before the rest, all of them seasoned veterans who had spent the past few years constantly honing their stroke of choice. Even with Rei’s arduous training at camp, his last furious spurt brought rather sad news to Iwatobi High School.

_4 – Ryuugazaki Rei_

“I guess this tournament is on an entirely different level,” mumbled Makoto.

“That’s regionals for you..” moaned Nagisa, his head hanging at the thought that hard-working, talented, perfect Rei-chan couldn’t make it this time. As for Rei, he was still heaving as he crawled out of the pool and left for the nearest exit, his shoulders held stiffly to the very last not to let his disappointment show.

* * *

No scrambling down the stairs or urgent kisses awaited Rei on his way back this time. Far from daring to impose on him when he had just suffered a decided loss, Nagisa forced himself to wait patiently with the others, then gave Rei a timid smile on his return, rising up to hug him with unusual tenderness.

“You did your best, Rei-chan,” he whispered, squeezing hard enough to feel his shirt grow damp from Rei’s wet skin. Rei let out a content sigh as he wrapped his arms around Nagisa in return, brushing a careful hand through his hair.

“It’s alright, Nagisa-kun,” he replied with a smile when they parted, turning briefly to Makoto and Haruka in an attempt to include them in the conversation. “The swimmers I competed against had probably been training regularly for years. I’m very thankful that I managed to make it this far with only seasonal training.”

“You were great out there,” said Makoto warmly. Even Haru nodded attentively.

“You did well, Rei,” he forced himself to say, causing Rei to flush crimson at the unexpected praise.

“Haruka-senpai..! Thank you…” he breathed, straightening his shoulders in salute, then swooping forward in a reverent bow to his captain. Haru tensed and turned his head.

“Enough already,” he mumbled in embarrassment. Makoto laughed.

“What shall we do until your next event?” he asked. “We have almost four hours.”

“I believe it is still too early for lunch,” mused Rei, “but we could go for a walk around the stadium, since we got to see very little of the surroundings while we waited in line for registration. We could have lunch after our walk, and if none of you mind, I might retire to my room afterwards to rest until my next event.”

“Sounds fine to me,” replied Makoto. Haru shrugged benignly.

“Let’s go, then!” said Nagisa in earnest cheerfulness.

They thus left the spectator’s balcony for a stroll around the stadium, which on closer inspection seemed to comprise a series of smaller courts nestled close to the main building, including a small outdoor pool surrounded by a chain link fence. Barren trees flanked the entire length of the path, each surrounded by red brick flowerbeds that reminded Haruka of the graffitied brick bed at Iwatobi Elementary.

* * *

He was not the only one to think so. On his own independent walk, Rin had discovered it as well, so he stopped under the one cherry tree facing the outdoor pool and stood there for quite some time, leaving only when the sound of a group approaching frightened him away. He started running in an ever widening lap, first around the stadium, then down the road, until he arrived at a turn that offered a spectacular view of the hillside.

Rin stopped, lifting his head to gaze upon the dozen scattered windmills in the distance. It seemed so peaceful up there, Rin felt as though no filth he was dragging behind him could survive such a magnificent climb.

Further away, he glimpsed a secluded path just an arm’s reach from the sky, wild and romantic. Just staring at it, a monologue formed in Rin’s mind, spurred by the thought that he had found the perfect place to speak his mind and watch his words fall to the depths, with no one to hear his confession except those for whom he intended it.

One person, in fact.

The only one he owed any explanation at all.

* * *

That night at Iwatobi High School, where access was kindly provided to the Craft Club’s room by Amakata Miho, Kou and Chigusa were hard at work putting the finishing touches on the swim club’s official tournament banner, which was the joint work of Chigusa’s talented friends in exchange for being allowed to come and cheer for the boys at regionals. Once Kou supplied them with all the necessary specifications, the first result of which was the makeshift banner they had taken with them to Iwatobi Station, the girls completely revamped the design. It now featured ferocious ocean waves against a glaring white sky, the sun replaced by a fiery bird in flight that Kou suspected was a very liberal interpretation of Moltres.

“All done!” she told Chigusa as she drew a final exclamation mark, so the waves read in large black letters, _Fly Sky High! Iwatobi Swim Club!_ “What do you think?”

Chigusa furrowed her brow.

“It looks good.. except for the bird…” came her verdict. Kou groaned.

“Blame your friends, not me!” she snapped at Chigusa. Behind her, the door creaked open as Ama-chan leaned into the classroom.

“Girls, we should all go home now,” she told them with a concerned expression. “We’ll be leaving early tomorrow morning.”

“Yes, we’re almost done…” replied Kou, her words trailing off into silence as her phone vibrated on a nearby desk, thrumming against the wood until Kou picked it up to check her messages.

“Onii-chan?” she blurted, half wanting to pinch herself to make sure she wasn’t dreaming.

**From: Onii-chan**

**I need to ask you something.**

Kou gasped and hit _Reply_.

_What is it? Are you okay, Onii-chan?_

Within half a minute, the phone vibrated again.

**I need Tachibana’s number.**

Kou quirked her brow at the strange request, but promptly clicked out of her messages to scroll down her contacts, until she found Makoto’s number. She copied and pasted it into a new reply. Underneath it, she wrote,

_Here you go! Is everything okay? Good luck tomorrow!_

Five minutes passed, during which the girls packed everything away. Kou had just about given up on waiting any longer when the phone vibrated one more time.

**Thanks.**

_Any time! Sleep well!_ she typed in disbelief, holding onto the phone in a surge of hope until she finally admitted that no more replies could come from her aloof brother.


	61. EPISODE 11: Desperate All-out! - Part 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When the Iwatobi Swim Club finally tired of walking around the stadium, they consulted Makoto’s brochures again, deciding to seek out another one of the restaurants Kou so kindly marked for them. Their choice was a fast food restaurant just two blocks away, and once everyone had eaten to their heart’s content, Rei requested permission to retire until his next event. The captain readily obliged him. The three of them even escorted Rei all the way to his room, mostly to make up their own minds as to whether they preferred to rest themselves, or explore the city some more.

Upon parting with Rei, Nagisa declared he was simply too alert to sleep, and desperately in need of company with no Rei-chan to pester for the next few hours. Makoto showed no disappointment while Haru could just barely mask his, but unable to argue with Nagisa, or persuade Makoto to argue in his stead, the three of them took to the streets once more, winding about until they happened upon an empty playground surrounded by trees on all sides. Ever the opportunist, Nagisa ran over to the swings, shamelessly claiming one of the seats on the left side. Makoto and Haruka stopped to stare. Makoto flushed.

“Isn’t he a little too old for this..?” he mumbled as Nagisa kicked himself away from the ground and into the air. Haru’s eyes drifted from the swings to Makoto.

“We can leave while he’s distracted,” he replied, his expression guarded as Makoto turned to stare at him.

“Haru-chan, Mako-chan! Come over here!” cried Nagisa from the swing. Makoto sighed.

“Coming..!” he called out, shaking his head as he and Haru broke into a casual stroll.

“Leave while he’s distracted,” Makoto echoed in amusement. “ _Really,_ Haru…”

“You’re the one who got embarrassed, not me,” muttered Haruka.

Just to annoy Makoto for dismissing his idea, Haru parted from him as soon as Makoto stopped by the railing, and sat down on the swing next to Nagisa’s, though he seemed to have no intention of using it for its intended purpose. Makoto shook his head again, but his lips stretched into a lenient smile. Haru stared back at him with softened features.

Nagisa’s eyes darted back and forth. He could almost feel an invisible bubble growing around them that threatened to lock him out.

“Mako-chan, push me!” he said as he came sailing into the air with his feet swinging forward. Makoto laughed.

“Aren’t you a little old for this, Nagisa?” he chided with amused looks. Nagisa scoffed.

“You’re only as old as you feel, Mako-chan!” he replied gleefully.

Since there were no parents around to judge them, and no children deprived of enjoyment, Makoto walked around to stop behind Nagisa, waiting patiently for him to fall backwards. As he did, Makoto’s hands slipped softly onto Nagisa’s back, then gave a mighty push. Nagisa giggled in delight.

A moment later, Haruka’s feet pulled away from the ground.

“Push me too,” he told Makoto as he gripped the chains, his head arched forward. Makoto turned to him surprised. Nagisa whistled in awe.

“Oooh, a competitor!” he cooed with another kick of his feet. “But you’ll never catch up, Haru-chan! I outnumber you one Mako-chan to none!”

“Now, now,” chuckled Makoto as he stepped away from Nagisa and behind Haru. “You’re already going pretty fast, so Haru needs the boost more than you. Ready, Haru?”

Haru hummed, arching his head forward just a little more. He even wiggled his shoulders to loosen them. Makoto suppressed his laughter, then grabbed the chains where they met the seat, his hands brushing against Haru’s thighs as Makoto pulled him backwards.

A moment later, Makoto released him and Haru glided forward almost in slow motion, his legs tucked firmly under the swing, then came down swaying somewhat to his right. Makoto gave him another push. Haru dropped backwards like a tether ball too heavy to fly.

“Haru… don’t you know how to swing?” he risked in a careful tone. Haru pursed his lips.

“You just sit and swing,” he muttered with flushed cheeks, unable to admit that on the rare occasions he visited the neighborhood playground, he usually ended up by the water pump, where he played in the puddles until his mother dragged him inside. Makoto fell silent. Nagisa snorted, but quickly composed himself when Haru gave him a glare.

“Kick your feet up whenever you swing forward, then pull them back when you start falling down, Haru-chan. That way you’ll go higher and faster!” he said, making a show of pulling his legs upward as he soared towards the sky, then curling them back under himself as he dropped. Haru watched him for a few seconds, then turned away, his ankles pressed together as he lifted both feet. Makoto grabbed the chains again to pull him back, glad neither of his friends could see his flushed face as his fingers pressed against Haru’s hips.

With some practice, Haru eventually caught up to Nagisa and then some, flying on the wings of Makoto’s hands that cupped his back every turn to push him with firm but gentle force, until even Nagisa grew tired of the swing.

* * *

The three of them returned to the hotel soon after, lazing around in Haru and Makoto’s room in casual conversation of the day’s races until Rei came knocking on the door, having just awakened from a power nap, and ready to leave for the stadium. His earlier loss of the one-hundred meter butterfly no longer occupied his thoughts, or rather had been banished for the present. To maintain the morale of his team, Rei was more than willing to fix his eyes on the next obstacle instead of his scratches from the last one.

They arrived in time to catch the last heat of the two-hundred meter breaststroke. Upon entering the balcony, they could hear the roars of Samezuka Academy spurring on its breaststroke swimmer, but try as the boys might, they could see nothing of Rin on the benches. Rei and Nagisa exchanged puzzled glances, while Haru’s brow creased in what seemed to be concern. Makoto, ever so observant, allowed himself a small sigh before he turned to Haruka, telling his friend with a feeble smile that Rin might have simply gone to get himself a drink or use the restroom. His words were spoken with no small degree of uncertainty, let alone willingness, but where Makoto failed to please himself, he nonetheless soothed Haruka into sitting down, his features calm as he waited for Rei’s event to start.

* * *

In truth, Rin was in no hurry to get back to his team. After running up the road to the windmills, choosing the perfect spot for his intended soliloquy, then walking back down all the way to the Prefecture Hotel to measure the time it might take Tachibana to reach him at a casual pace, Rin made another turn around the stadium, where he caught up with his fellow swimmers just in time to go to lunch. He waited for them to pass so he could fall into place at the rear, waiting until they arrived at the restaurant to sit down next to Nitori.

He proceeded to eat in casual silence, as though he had never left. Aiichiro certainly acted so for Senpai’s sake, going so far as to make pretend conversation about Kawamura-kun’s final spurt that Rin hummed at with lukewarm interest, hoping Mikoshiba’s ears weren’t half as good as his front crawl.

By the end of lunch, he almost relished returning with everyone else to the spectator’s benches. He sat down on the left end of the top row, watching intently, but just as the final heat of the two-hundred meter breaststroke began, he slipped away once more while Mikoshiba’s back was turned. Seijuurou stole a glance at the top row as soon as the club was done cheering for its brave contestant below, noting Matsuoka’s absence with growing disdain. Nitori noticed too, and mouthed his apologies with a troubled smile. Seijuurou set his jaw and turned away from him, now glad of only one thing: the Iwatobi Swim Club itself was one member short today, so Kou-san did not have to witness her brother’s disgraceful lack of interest in anything except his own hidden agenda.

Rin himself felt little remorse. Having successfully evaded Mikoshiba, he accomplished his sole object of missing Rei’s two-hundred meter event, which, though Rin would not have known, turned out much the same as the one-hundred meter butterfly. Though the long distances swum at training camp had definitely given Rei an edge at prefecturals, in the face of advanced competition at regionals, third place was all he could manage, though he had driven himself till he could scarcely breathe. The idea pained him considerably after having meditated for over an hour in his room, then taken the perfect power nap to boot, but upon his arrival to the benches, Rei put on his best smile and told his team he would not give up hope for the medley relay just yet. In return, he received their warmest compliments, along with a firm grip of a hug from Nagisa, which cheered Rei up enough to suggest they stay until the closing ceremony.

The others had no objections, so they remained in their seats to relax for the rest of the day, a wait that rewarded them with a glimpse of Rin at last. He snuck back to the Samezuka benches just in time to attend the closing ceremony, slipping into the first open seat at the top row. He snuck by most of Samezuka undetected, but was spotted by Nagisa on his way there, then pointed out by Makoto for Haruka’s convenience when he sat down. Haru acknowledged his rival’s return with a small sigh of relief. Rei and Nagisa exchanged happy glances but remained silent, and deep inside, Makoto thanked them for it.

As for Rin, he might as well have stayed away from his team for good. Only by some wondrous last-minute display of camaraderie could he have changed Mikoshiba’s mind, and Rin was not about to surprise the captain or anyone else. He remained taciturn and withdrawn on his reappearance, occasionally stealing a glance at the captain, but Seijuurou did his best to feign disinterest in him for the rest of the evening, biding his time until everyone would retire to their rooms so he could speak to the black sheep alone. There was no need to make an example of Matsuoka in front of the entire swim club just before tomorrow’s freestyle event. To wait until nightfall to confront him in the privacy of Mikoshiba’s own room was going to be the captain’s final act of mercy.

Yet even in the administration of a coup de grâce, Seijuurou was forced to wait. He endured a two-hour long celebratory feast at the hotel restaurant, then graciously allowed Matsuoka fifteen minutes to return to his room, but he might as well have been less generous, for when he knocked on the door, it was answered by Nitori alone, planting the first seeds of suspicion in Seijuurou’s mind.

“Captain Mikoshiba,” blurted Aiichiro as he straightened himself in his tracksuit jacket and pajama shorts. Behind him, a lopsided stack of clothes and toiletries gave a final wobble and toppled over from the table. Seijuurou quirked his brow.

“Is Matsuoka here?” he asked calmly. Nitori cracked an awkward smile.

“Matsuoka-senpai left a few minutes ago,” he explained to his captain, whose expression flattened alarmingly fast. “H-He didn’t say where,” carried on Aiichiro in panic, “but he left in his training clothes, so Senpai might have gone running, to prepare himself for his events!”

“I see,” said Mikoshiba in a dry tone. “Tell him to come see me when he’s back.”

“Of course!” saluted Aiichiro. Seijuurou paused.

“Nitori..”

“Yes, Captain Mikoshiba?” replied Aiichiro, his eyes large in anticipation. Seijuurou suppressed a sigh.

“You try too hard,” he muttered as he turned away to head back to his room, leaving a perplexed Aiichiro behind.

* * *

Just as Seijuurou shut the door at the Prefecture Hotel, Hotel Premium saw a round of pleasant exchanges between the Iwatobi Swim Club as they retired to their rooms in the hopes of a good night’s sleep. More exhausted than the rest, Rei expressed his wish to go to bed as early as half past eight, and since he was blessed with an early-bird captain, who soon broke into tired shivers and required Makoto’s jacket to keep warm, everyone agreed to turn their evening walk around. Even Nagisa’s eyelids had grown heavy by the time they reached the fourth floor, but not Makoto’s, who sprawled out on top of his covers with his hands tucked behind his head, still wide awake when Haruka stepped out of the bathroom. Having taken his evening bath, Haru was about to drop, but by some stubborn tick of his heart, he anchored himself by the wall to stare at his friend, steeling himself as Makoto’s eyes continued to roam the ceiling.

“Makoto,” spoke Haruka, his voice low, but strangely urgent. Makoto lifted his head.

“Yes, Haru?”

Haru took a deep breath through his nose. If it worked for Makoto, then it would surely work for him, too.

“Do you remember now?” he asked on the wings of his own breath of courage. Makoto blinked in confusion. Haru pursed his lips.

“The thing you wanted to say last night.”

Makoto stared at him for a long moment, then flushed in realization and broke into a sheepish grin. He planted his hands to push himself up, one hand slipping to his cheek to scratch it with a finger.

“I uh.. I’m still thinking about it,” he replied in a soft trail of awkward laughter, dropping his hand into his lap where it entwined bashfully with the other. Haruka glared at him, eyes sharp and hands balled into fists, but the ten seconds he allowed for Makoto to produce a confession of any kind passed away in uncomfortable looks and nervous giggling that Makoto struggled to contain.

When the moment passed unfulfilled, Haru turned his head archly, then marched to his bed, his back turned to Makoto as he flopped down onto his side and pulled the covers over himself. He could hear a faint rustle as Makoto settled back down into bed. He could almost see him turn his head.

“Good night, Haru,” said Makoto in that same apologetic tone of last night. Haru huffed.

“Night,” he muttered into his pillow, wondering what he expected from a guy who nearly drowned in the ocean before he could bear to admit he was scared of water.

* * *

The electronic clock soon ticked to 9:12 pm – fairly late for the early bird, but much too early for the night owl. While Haru hadn’t stirred under his covers for some time, Makoto continued to toss and turn with his eyes screwed shut, unable to rest. As a last resort, he imagined himself on a green meadow, where a flock of cloudy sheep had queued up by a wooden fence, jumping over one by one in an attempt to lull him into sleep. Attentive though he was to his imaginary flock, Makoto sometimes lost count, or some of the sheep turned into cats on the way, and each time his absent-mindedness produced a glitch, Makoto instinctively stole a glance at Haruka. Darkness had draped itself across their hotel room, but in what little light remained, Makoto saw stiff shoulders, tightening folds of the covers hugging Haru’s slender frame, and a single cowlick sprouting shamelessly from the top of his head. He was silent and motionless enough, but Makoto could occasionally discern some sharpness of breath he had never noticed in all the nights Haru had slept in his arms. Was he upset? Was he nervous?

Was he thinking about Rin…?

Makoto closed his eyes as he drew a sharp breath to steady himself. He would make a fair exchange. His own peace of mind, for Haruka’s.

“Haru.. are you asleep?” he whispered, allowing room for rejection, whether unconscious or grudge-born. Makoto waited patiently. Haru’s shoulders tensed under the covers.

“No. I’m awake,” came the quiet reply. Makoto’s face softened.

“You can’t fall asleep either, huh?”

“Yeah,” sighed Haruka, his tone defeated. Makoto’s eyes dulled.

“I hope we make it to the final tomorrow,” he said gently, forcing a small smile to lend his words proper warmth. “Whatever happens, I’m looking forward to swimming with you.”

Haru’s breath hitched. Makoto paused, eyes screwed tightly shut.

“And… I’m sure Rin does too,” he added, hoping his voice didn’t tremble nearly as much as his heart. “He was absent a few times today, but I’m sure he’ll be there tomorrow, waiting to race us just like everyone said.”

Haru could just barely force a hum as own heart gave a leap and slipped into his throat, beating fiercely at the thought that Makoto had spoken more about Rin that day than anyone had in several days, just to give comfort where he felt it lacking…

Silence followed as if Makoto had exhausted his reserves, but where one could say no more, the urge to speak welled up in the other. Haru bit his lip as he braced himself, one hand clamping onto the corner of his pillow for strength. _Come on, say something, anything… how hard can this be?_

“Makoto..”

Makoto let out a small, tired grunt, but obediently turned his head. Haru’s eyes bore into the wall.

“I appreciate your begin here for me,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper. “Thank you.”

Makoto’s eyes widened in disbelief at the words he once thought he would never hear, his chest humming with such heat his next breath felt like a gasp of steam.

“Haru..?!” he cried as he bolted upright to stare, his voice ringing raw with shock that sent a wave of warmth over Haruka. He could almost hear his own ears sizzle, and feel Makoto’s eyes against his shoulders. Was he being ridiculous? Did he make a fool of himself in the sudden urge to communicate? He shouldn’t have said anything… There was a reason he always waited for Makoto to speak first…

He untangled himself from his covers and sat up, careful to face away from the other. He had to leave the room, he needed time to think of where his confession went wrong…

“I’m going out for a quick run,” he blurted the first flimsy excuse that came to mind.

“At this hour?!” cried Makoto behind his back in that same tone of surprise, but Haru could no longer be detained by anything except tender force. He stiffly rose from the bed to shuffle towards the hallway, and when he made it to the door with no resistance from Makoto, Haru grabbed his sneakers, then shut the door hastily behind him.

Makoto stared after him thunderstruck, but a moment later, he broke into laughter that no amount of politeness or discipline could properly mask with coughing. All pain and fear of tomorrow dispersed inside him, his chest so light he could have floated to the sky. He slapped a hand on his cheek and flopped backwards, sprawling on the bed with a grin, half hoping his sudden dizziness wouldn’t claim him before Haru returned from what he promised would be a quick run. Perhaps then, Makoto might tell him, that _he…_

The phone drummed against his nightstand. Makoto reached for it eagerly.

His grin wilted at once.

_From: Unknown_

_Meet me uphill where the windmills are. Come alone. I’m waiting. –Matsuoka Rin_

Makoto gritted his teeth as his chest burst in helpless anger, his former euphoria fading away as rapidly as it had come over him. He had half a mind to dial the number, to tell Rin he did not want to see or talk to him, but it was no use anymore. The summons had been issued in no uncertain terms. Rin might have already made the journey uphill, or was well on his way, and Makoto did not believe in wasting anyone’s efforts, nor could he afford to run away. Not from Matsuoka Rin. After all, if he did… who would stay and fight for Haru..?

Makoto let out a heavy sigh, but crawled out of bed at last to put his tracksuit back on. He grabbed his keycard from the nightstand, then left the hotel running. He saw nothing of Haruka on the way.

* * *

The climb was long, but not fruitless. A dark silhouette in the distance confirmed that Rin was there like he had promised, his eyes resting on the vista as Makoto approached him in glaring whites and muted blues. Rin stood still as a statue, taking no notice of the other, but when Makoto came to a halt a few meters away, Rin turned his head at last.

“Yo,” he said calmly, though his features tensed. Makoto took a deep breath, a small knot of muscle twitching in his chest.

“What do you want?” he asked with more patience than he felt. Rin turned back to gaze at the city. It was easier that way.

“I never answered your question,” he replied. Makoto’s eyes narrowed.

“That’s not necessary anymore.”

“No. I’ll give you my answer,” said Rin, his tone sharper than he intended. “I won’t feel like it’s over until I do.”

Makoto instinctively lifted his head. Rin fixed his eyes on the closest windmill and its slowly rotating blades, imagining them the handles of a clock.

“You wanted to know how I feel about Haru, right?” he began, his tone distant and dreamlike as the words came pouring forth. “It’s true that I was fixated on racing him. But it wasn’t Haru’s fault that I wanted to quit swimming.”

“Of course it wasn’t,” muttered Makoto, his hands curling into fists. Rin shot him a dull glare. Makoto lowered his head, though his eyes flashed unyielding. Rin’s eyes drifted to the sky.

“I was pretty shocked when I lost to him,” he carried on when no more interruptions came. “But that wasn’t what did it. Since you know so much about me, you probably know I moved to Australia, to join a swimming school.”

Makoto nodded. Rin’s eyes darkened.

“I trained every day and participated in tournaments like everyone else, but I couldn’t swim the way I wanted to,” he said, his voice dissolving into tremors. “After a while, the Olympics were completely out of reach. It felt more and more like I was being left behind. And I could only wonder: why was I struggling so much? _Why?_ And then I realized… it had to be because of the relay. I ruined myself in the effort to swim with others. I bent over backwards to be part of a team, and in the end, it took its toll on me.”

Makoto flinched. Rin caught it from the corner of his eye, but said nothing.

“I needed to forget about them in order to move on. That was the conclusion I arrived at,” he continued, his tone lifeless. “And after I returned to Japan, I didn’t let any of them know. It was easier that way.”

“You should have gone and apologized to Haru,” spoke Makoto once more, his fists tightening by his sides. “All these years he thought he was the one who hurt you. He even stopped swimming competitively out of guilt. You owe him an apology.”

Rin furrowed his brow, but refused to turn and face him.

“What are you, his guardian angel or something?” he retorted, his voice crackling under the weight. Makoto tensed.

“I am whatever I need to be,” he said quietly. Rin scoffed.

“You really are something else,” he replied, half amused, half bewildered. Whenever he got that strange look in his eyes, Tachibana didn’t sound human…

“Tell me…” spoke Rin, struggling to raise his voice in the dead of night. “Have you ever been to a seaside funeral when you were younger?”

Makoto flinched a second time. Rin closed his eyes in relief.

“So it _was_ you,” he sighed. “The boy on the pier.”

“You were with your sister,” replied Makoto, his voice hollow. “When I first met her on the way to joint practice, I thought she looked familiar, with her ponytail.”

“Funny, isn’t it,” said Rin in a faraway tone. “Of everyone at Iwatobi, I’ve known you the longest by pure chance. Who did you lose in that typhoon?”

“A friend,” replied Makoto. “Haru told me you and Kou-chan lost your father. I’m sorry.”

Silence fell between them as Rin took a long drag of cool night air, wishing it could freeze the hot tangle in his heart.

 _A friend, huh…_ Rin had lost of a few of his own along the way.

“Where was I?” he spoke at last, fumbling for the thread Tachibana’s words had severed. “Like I said, I didn’t speak to anyone. I kept clear away from them for as long as I could, until I learned on the first day of the trimester that the others decided to go to the Iwatobi Swimming Club. We buried our trophy there, in the backyard.”

“So that’s why Haru got in trouble on the first day,” noted Makoto. Rin shrugged.

“I don’t know about that,” he carried on offended. “All I know is that I got there before all the rest and dug up the trophy by myself. Back then I was so proud of it, too, but when I got to hold it again, it felt like something cold and dead in my hands. At that moment I knew there was nothing waiting for me there, but for some reason, I waited anyway. I was desperate enough to challenge Haru to a race then and there, hoping it would get rid of this stupid slump that came over me when I left. And when I finally got to swim with him the next night, I had a breakthrough.”

Rin finally turned to face Makoto, his eyes flashing.

“After our race, I wanted to swim again.”

Makoto stared at him wordlessly. Rin’s gaze drifted to the stars, his throat growing tight.

“Later on, I watched you guys swim at prefecturals, and it reminded me of our relay… and at that moment, I knew I wanted to try one more time. I don’t know what I have to do to move on, but I will do whatever it takes.”

Their eyes met. When Rin straightened his shoulders, Makoto instinctively copied him.

“Tachibana Makoto,” began Rin, his words finally ringing crisp in the evening wind. “I challenge you to a race. Tomorrow I’m going to swim backstroke in Samezuka’s relay, and I’m going to show you just how good I can be. Do the best you can with your teammates, and try not to embarrass yourself like you did at prefecturals.”

Makoto swallowed. Rin’s shoulders relaxed.

“That’s all I have to say,” he said as he walked past Makoto’s petrified form. “Sorry to make you come out here.”

 _Not as sorry as I am_ , thought Makoto, his heart sinking to his stomach heavier than lead.

* * *

While Makoto walked and Rin stood still, Haruka ran. He had thrown himself into the night with burning cheeks, his bare feet slick with sweat in the hot confines of his sneakers, and he ran, letting instinct carry him down the street. At every corner, the sudden jolt of shame that ignited his core in the hotel room continued to spur Haru on, promising a long run that he hoped would last until Makoto fell asleep so Haru could sneak back unnoticed, to an empty bed that would feel just as empty with him on top of it.

His face scrunched up in confusion as he broke into a lap around the stadium. Why did Makoto sound so shocked? Was it the novelty of Haru’s expressions of gratitude, or had he somehow made a false assumption about Makoto’s intended meaning? The former seemed more likely, yet it was hard to say without looking, and Haru didn’t dare look at Makoto.

Oh, how he envied Nagisa. To speak his mind without restraint seemed like child’s play to Nagisa, while tearing the right words from the eternal jumble of Haru’s mind to arrange them in patterns others could easily understand appeared to be a useless struggle. Makoto had come closest to taking a meager handful of his signals and deciphering them in ways even Haru could approve of, but even Makoto had to learn the signs first, and Haru felt like a poor scholar of himself.

He scolded his own cowardice as he came to a halt to catch his breath on the other side of the stadium, left in shivers the moment he stopped moving. He wrapped his arms around himself as he turned instinctively in the direction of the hotel to head back in measured steps. Perhaps if he walked slowly enough, Makoto would fall asleep out of sheer boredom by the time Haru got back.

* * *

Haru eventually made it past reception safely, his arms rubbing his sides vigorously as the elevator climbed to the fourth floor. The moment their door swam into view, Haru let out a sigh, and with one more look around, he snuck to the door to turn the knob. It didn’t budge. Haru furrowed his brow, but soon hummed in realization and reached into his pocket for his keycard.

His hands grasped at nothing. In the effort to escape Makoto, he had left all his belongings on the nightstand.

His cheeks flushed in shame, but it was no use, so Haru set his jaw as he lifted his hand rap his knuckles against the door. He waited. Silence followed.

“Makoto?” he blurted, first in a whisper, then as loud as his tight throat could bear to, knocking even louder this time. Still no reply. Makoto had either fallen in too deep a sleep to answer, or disappeared entirely while Haru was away…

The next knock landed on Rei and Nagisa’s door, five times in rapid succession. Haru sighed in relief as he heard sleepy mumbles from behind the wood, then the scrape of slipper-clad feet across the floor.

Nagisa opened the door in pajamas, one fist rubbing at his eyes and his hair a disheveled haystack.

“Haru-chan…?” he moaned with a squint as the hall lights blinded him. Haru’s eyes widened.

“Is Makoto here?” he asked in a strained tone. Nagisa stared at him blankly.

“Wha..? I thought he was with you…”

“He was, but I went running, and now he’s not answering,” owned Haruka. Nagisa quirked a confused brow.

“Well, why don’t you call him, Haru-chan?” he mumbled, making a vague and unsuccessful attempt at smothering a yawn. Haru’s eyes drifted to the floor.

“I forgot my keycard and my phone.”

“Aaaah,” sighed Nagisa. “I’ll call him, then.”

He toddled back inside to grab his phone from the nightstand, dialing Makoto’s number on his way to the hallway. Haru pressed his ear to the other door in wait, but not even fifteen rings from Nagisa produced any sound or Makoto. Nagisa pressed _End Call_ and shrugged his shoulders. Haru tensed.

“Maybe he switched it off,” suggested Nagisa. Haru shook his head firmly.

“He set a morning alarm on it,” he replied. Nagisa shrugged again, flashing a soothing smile at poor, discomforted Haruka.

“I’m sure he’ll be back soon, Haru-chan. Do you want to come over while you wait?”

“I don’t want to bother Rei,” said Haru with a shake of his head. Nagisa hummed.

“Then we can sit out here so we’ll be sure to catch Mako-chan when he returns,” he said, closing the door behind himself as quietly as he could. He and Haru sank down right after, throwing their backs against the wood. Haruka’s eyes fell to the floor as one hand scratched idly at his foot. Nagisa cocked his head.

“How come you were out so late though, Haru-chan?” he asked at last. Haru flushed.

“I’m…”

“Too nervous to sleep, right?” offered Nagisa with a smile. Haru turned his head.

“Not exactly.”

Nagisa giggled as he let his eyes wander to the ceiling.

“I’m feeling pretty nervous myself,” he said in a faraway voice. Haru blinked.

“You are?”

Nagisa hummed.

“What if I screw up my dive tomorrow?” he mused out loud, arms instinctively wrapping around his knees. “If I did, wouldn’t I ruin the relay? I haven’t screwed up my dive in a long, long time, but now that we’re gonna swim together again, I can’t help but worry about things I usually don’t think about. Plus we’ll be racing Rin-chan tomorrow, too. That’s probably why you’re nervous, Haru-chan.”

Haru’s eyes fell to the floor in wonderment. Was he really nervous? The flutter of his heart seemed more like excitement, anticipation, even longing. After three years of idling helplessly, he would be racing Rin a third time tomorrow, in a medley relay, no less. Where would he be now, if it hadn’t been for the swim club? And where would the swim club be, if it hadn’t been for Nagisa’s insistence to revive it? Perhaps he and Makoto would have never grown so close either, if it hadn’t been for all they’ve been through together…

“It’s all thanks to you,” he said quietly, no longer as tongue-tied as he felt earlier.

“Huh?” mumbled Nagisa. Haru closed his eyes.

“You’re the one who came up with the idea of starting a swim club.”

“Y-Yeah, that’s right,” allowed Nagisa. Haru’s looks softened.

“I never thought I’d be swimming in a relay again. But because of you, here we are, together again.”

Nagisa could feel his cheeks flood with color at the unexpected praise. He slapped his hands on his hips instinctively to deflect it with a jest, flashing Haru a self-satisfied smirk as he straightened in his seat.

“Well, that means you should be showing more gratitude to me, Haru-chan!” he declared in mock pride, waiting to be put in his proper place or brushed off in that good old Haru-chan way.

“Yeah,” replied Haruka, wiping Nagisa’s face blank.

“Eh?!” he blurted in surprise, but Haruka turned to him calmly, locking him in a stare.

“Thanks, Nagisa,” he said plainly.

Opposite him, Nagisa’s cheeks bloomed no longer red, but a happy pink as his hands peeled away from his hips, utterly defeated, but not minding in the slightest.

“Haru-chan!” he cried in joy and pounced his friend, pinning him to the door in a surge of unbridled affection. “I’m so happy, Haru-chan!”

“Hey, Nagisa! Stop it! Are you listening?!” snapped Haru from underneath him, unable to move from shock. In the absence of resistance, Nagisa continued to hug him mercilessly, squealing with delight until the sound of footsteps sobered him, forcing both of them to look up.

It was Makoto, standing a few feet away and staring quite alarmed at the human pile in front of him.

“Haru.. Nagisa..” he blurted, his face red as though he had walked in on something intimate. Haru flushed crimson. Nagisa untangled himself with a nervous giggle.

“Aaah, Mako-chan’s back,” he said with a nervous scratch of his head, stumbling back to his own door as Haru sprang to his feet, causing him to lose balance.

“Where were you?” he frowned as he stepped over to Makoto, his tone hard. Makoto blinked, then broke into a nervous grin.

“I uh, I went out for an evening run… since you reminded me that I haven’t in a while…” he said as he scratched his cheek with a finger. Haru gave him a miffed look.

“I’m going to bed,” he said out loud as he turned to the door and turned the handle, to no avail. His shoulders slumped in defeat. “…After you unlock the door.”

“You forgot to bring your keycard?” asked Makoto needlessly.

Haru shot him a glare. Makoto’s eyebrows arched pitifully.

“Sorry, Haru… Here,” he dug into his pocket, then swiped his keycard over the lock. Haru proceeded inside, hoping Nagisa wasn’t laughing at him, but Makoto turned back apologetically from the doorway in his stead.

“I hope I didn’t cause any trouble…” he risked with an awkward smile. Nagisa shook his head.

“No trouble at all, Mako-chan! Haru-chan couldn’t get in and I didn’t want to wake up Rei-chan, so I kept Haru-chan company while you were away.”

“Thank you,” replied Makoto warmly. Haruka huffed pointedly from inside the room.

“ _Good night, Nagisa_ ,” he called out. Nagisa snorted.

“Good night, Haru-chan, Mako-chan!” he called out sweetly as Makoto walked inside, closing the door behind him. Nagisa shook his head with a lenient grin.

“Now to get some sleep myself,” he whispered to himself as he turned back to his own door and turned the knob – only to find himself locked out.

“Rei-chan… _Rei-chan!_ ” he wailed as he banged on the door, hoping Rei wasn’t going to murder him for forgetting to bring his keycard when he grabbed his phone.

* * *

In the other room, Makoto excused himself with rosy cheeks, then turned away from Haru while he changed back into his pajamas again. Haru now stood by the bed barefoot, his toes scraping against the floorboards as he watched the other, racking his mind for something to say that wasn’t a reproof – and a hypocritical one at that. Nagisa probably did laugh at him in the hallway, and Haru deserved it, but what to say now that they were finally alone…?

Makoto climbed into bed, tugging the covers over himself once again. Haru’s eyes lit up.

“Makoto.”

The other hummed, then turned on his side to face Haru, who tensed his shoulders.

“I’m cold,” he mumbled, squinting as he forced himself to look his friend in the eye. Makoto blinked.

“Eh? You are? Do you want me to turn the heat on, Haru?”

“No..”

“Do you need an extra blanket?”

Haru shook his head. Makoto quirked his brow, but a moment later, his eyes grew large in realization.

“Aaah…” he breathed with a stunned expression, one hand scratching at the nape of his neck as he sat upright. “I suppose I’m a little cold too,” he added in a soothing tone.

A moment later, he shifted to the left, pulling his pillow after himself as he scooted to the edge. Haru’s shoulders sank in relief as he gathered his own blanket, draped it over his shoulders, then followed Makoto into bed. His pillow lay abandoned on the other bed. Makoto broke into a bashful smile, but obediently pulled up his arm for Haru to rest his head. Haru lay down on his back almost chastely, just an inch from Makoto’s side, resting his head by the crook of his friend’s elbow. Makoto turned to glance at him.

“You don’t like sleeping alone, huh,” he risked in a soft tone. Haru pursed his lips and turned his eyes. Makoto chuckled. “Me neither.”

Haru let out a small huff, then made a show of trying to get more comfortable, until a few nudges brought him pressing lightly against Makoto’s side, who made no effort to pull away from him.

Silence fell between them. Makoto’s sheep fled from the meadow.

“Haru…” he whispered into the darkness, his tone thick. Haruka let out a small hum to encourage him. Makoto’s eyes bore into the ceiling as he fumbled for the right start.

“When you were little, did you ever wish you had someone your age, a friend you could have shared everything with? Someone you could have spent time with every day, playing together or just sitting around… Someone who would have always been there for you no matter what, because you were important to them in a way nobody else was?”

A pause. Haru’s heart clenched more painfully than he would have liked.

“Yeah…” he breathed, his eyes stinging as he screwed them shut and curled against Makoto, his head rolling to the left. Makoto drew his arm closer, until he gingerly pressed his palm against Haru’s back.

“Me too,” he whispered in reply, relief pouring over him in waves. It wasn’t so hard after all, talking to Haru alone like this, in some faraway hotel room where only the darkness could hear. Perhaps it really was the moment Makoto had been waiting for. Unless the building suddenly burst into flames, or there was a bomb threat and they had to evacuate, or terrorists swooped in to take them hostage, or Nagisa and Rei came tearing down the door with an axe, or a dozen other scenarios that Makoto considered at length, then gladly discarded as highly unlikely, there was nothing for him to fear except rejection, was there…?

He took a deep breath. His palm pressed a little closer to the other’s back.

“Haru…” he whispered, carefully turning his head to face Haruka… to find him fast asleep in the nook of Makoto’s arm, bested by fatigue in the time it took his friend to consider all possible scenarios that might have stopped him from delivering his confession, and reminding Makoto that he had forgotten the most likely one. He stared at Haru wide-eyed, and upon hearing a faint snore, he pressed his free hand to his mouth to suppress laughter, for fear it would have turned into an agitated scream.

Unable to speak, Makoto wrapped his arm a little tighter around his friend instead. Haru let out a small sigh in his sleep. Makoto gradually lost the urge to scream.

“I guess I’ll tell you tomorrow,” he said quietly, his lips twitching into a hapless smile. “Good night, Haru.” He then closed his eyes, pulling the blankets blindly on top of them.

Darkness fell on the meadow, the sheep and cats sleeping side by side.

* * *

“Welcome back, Senpai,” called out Aiichiro from the bed when he finally heard the door click and close out of view. In another moment, Rin passed him wordlessly to sink down on the other bed, his back turned from the other. Aiichiro’s brow creased.

“Did something happen?” he asked carefully.

“No, nothing happened,” came the automatic reply. Aiichiro suppressed a sigh.

“Oh, that’s right,” he said with a small gasp as Seijuurou’s earlier visit sprang back into his mind. “The captain was looking for you. He probably wants to talk about the relay tomorrow.”

Rin turned around to steal a glance at Nitori, but his kouhai stared back at him in blissful ignorance of whatever Mikoshiba had to say. Rin set his jaw as he rose from the bed, one hand sinking into his pocket to confirm the presence of his keycard before he left for the hallway.

He knocked on Mikoshiba’s door three times. Seijuurou answered it remarkably slowly.

“You wanted to see me,” spoke Rin, keeping his features calm. Mikoshiba nodded.

“Tell me, Matsuoka, where were you today while our swimmers competed in butterfly?” he asked in what seemed a casual tone. Rin arched his head forward.

“I needed to be alone,” he replied at last with a straight face, refusing to show embarrassment at his own flimsy excuse, not even when Mikoshiba’s brow furrowed in discontent.

“Alone, huh,” he replied flatly. “Then I have good news for you.”

And with that, he lifted his hand to reach out a folded piece of paper to Rin, who reluctantly took it, then opened it with a flick of his wrist.

It appeared to be a chart of Samezuka’s Sunday events. Rin quirked his brow as he scanned the page for anything of interest, until his heart stopped at the bottom.

_Medley Relay_

_Ba: Azuma Yuuki / Br: Ueda Tsuyoshi / Bu: Kawamura Tetsuo / Fr: Noro Masaru_

“What..?” he blurted, his mouth suddenly dry. Seijuurou folded his arms over his chest.

“This will be our lineup for the relay tomorrow,” he said evenly as Rin’s eyes darted to the name that had replaced his. “You can focus on the one-hundred meter free.”

“Hold on! Why?!” cried Rin as panic seized him, but Mikoshiba did not so much as blink at his outburst.

“You haven’t paid any attention to your own relay team,” he said as he glared Rin down. “You’re focused on something else.”

Rin’s lips parted, but his throat clamped shut, until the words fell to the bottom of his stomach. Mikoshiba straightened his shoulders.

“I’m sending our best members out there,” he said next. “That’s what a team should do, and you’re not at your best right now.”

“You can’t…” breathed Rin, his fingers trembling as Seijuurou plucked the paper from his hand, lowering it back to his side.

“I can, and I did. I gave you a sporting chance, but you failed your teammates for the last time today,” was Mikoshiba’s verdict that no quiver of Rin’s lips or the horror in his eyes could change. “Azuma will swim in your place, so do your best in the one-hundred meter free. You are dismissed.”

Mikoshiba then closed the door with a dull click, leaving Rin stranded in the hallway that melted into tar before his eyes.

 

**_TO BE CONTINUED…_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 


	62. EPISODE 12: Distant Free! - Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next morning found Makoto and Haruka still in bed as the clock ticked to 7:00 am. On the nightstand, the screen of Makoto’s phone lit up and the alarm he had sat the previous night blared out – or would have, had Makoto not forgotten to turn the sound back on after muting his phone on the way to the hillside lookout. As things were, all the poor phone could do was rattle insistently against the wooden top of the nightstand until one of them stirred at last. It was Haru, who opened his eyes to find himself completely entwined in Makoto’s unconscious embrace, crammed against the other’s chest like a human pillow. Makoto’s right arm still rested under his head, though how it hadn’t moved when the rest of him decided to migrate all over the place, Haru could not even fathom. Both of them slept soundly through the night, of that he was certain. Haru had always been a calm sleeper, while Makoto’s usual nightmares fled from the proximity of his friend. Nevertheless, Makoto tended to shift about in his sleep, or so Haru discovered, and though he couldn’t feel the rest of Makoto’s right arm beyond the firm bicep under his cheek, the left arm now wrapped around his back, while a leg curled over his thigh rather shamelessly. Haru swallowed as he closed his eyes. His cheeks grew hot.

“Makoto…” he whispered, his tone thick. The other moaned, then gave him a needy squeeze.

“Just five more minutes..” mumbled Makoto in his sleep. Haru squinted at the familiar phrase. His sigh misted against Makoto’s collarbone.

“ _Fine._ Five minutes,” he grumbled quietly, nudging his head against Makoto’s bicep as he made a futile attempt to move his trapped arms and make himself more comfortable while he waited. With some effort, his right arm slipped from Makoto’s chest, then flopped against his friend’s side, fingers hooking into that too-large yellow and orange shirt. Haru closed his eyes and inhaled sleep-worn cotton wool. His heart fluttered like an errant butterfly, but his shoulders slumped in submission. All things considered, Makoto’s embrace felt cozy enough, and it wasn’t as though Haru was in any hurry to leave…

_BAM._

Haru’s eyes flew open. The door rumbled as though it were ready to break off its hinges. Makoto stirred against him and blinked awake, mumbling his friend’s name in a disoriented tone. _BAM, BAM, BAM, BAM, BAM…_

_Haru-chan! Mako-chan!_

“Nagisa,” whispered Haru. Makoto’s eyes widened behind the fog.

_BAM, BAM, BAM. Can we come in?_

Haru’s eyes widened too. Makoto made a choking sound.

The next moment, he untangled himself and rolled away from Haruka in his attempt to hurry and answer the door. He slammed his feet on the ground, then skidded to a halt by the foot of the bed, staring back at the mess he left behind.

_BAM, BAM, BAM._

His blanket now stretched from Haru’s side to the floor like a crumpled serpent, while Haru himself remained on Makoto’s bed in his own blanket, lifting his head with a sleepy glare. Makoto hesitated.

_Can you please answer, Haruka-senpai, Makoto-san!_

“G-GIVE US A MINUTE!” yelled Makoto, rushing back to burrow his arms beneath Haruka.

“Oi—” blurted Haru as Makoto yanked him to his chest and scooped Haru’s blanket-wrapped form off the bed, whirling around to the other bed much like he had done that morning ages and ages ago. His arms tensed under Haruka. A moment later, two hands seized the collar of Makoto’s shirt, clenching around the folds in a vice grip.

“Don’t you _dare…_ ” hissed Haruka, his eyes raining lightning. Something akin to an anxious giggle escaped Makoto.

His knee slipped to the edge of the bed for support as Makoto bent over slowly, laying Haru with tender care onto the cold sheets of his bed. Makoto even gave his friend a soothing pat on the shoulder, but Haru’s disappointed glare told him it was like a drop in an empty glass.

_Mako-chaaan!_

“ _COMING!_ ” cried Makoto as he spun around to make a dash for the door. Before he could reach the hall, a cold pillow hit the back of his head, bouncing to the floor. Makoto almost stopped to throw it back. Almost.

Instead he opened the door disheveled and his cheeks tinged red, chuckling nervously as he noted that Nagisa and Rei were already dressed in their Iwatobi Swim Club tracksuits, ready to leave for breakfast. Rei stole one glance at the mangled collar of Makoto’s shirt, opened his mouth, then closed it wordlessly. Nagisa, on the other hand, looked less amused as strangely jealous. Having woken up Rei last night just as he was on the verge of his next REM cycle, all Nagisa took to bed with him were the remnants of a piercing death glare, and an icy _Good night, Nagisa-kun…_ that left him cowering under his blanket until Rei started snoring at last. To add to Nagisa’s suffering, Rei then retaliated by holding his phone over his unsuspecting friend, blasting his alarm in Nagisa’s ear as early as six thirty. In comparison, Makoto looked like at least nine hours of deep, refreshing sleep. _Luckyyy…_

“You overslept, huh, Mako-chan,” muttered Nagisa as he suppressed a yawn, brought on by the thought of a warm bed and time to spare.

“Is everything alright, Makoto-san?” asked Rei, his eyes slipping pointedly to the pillow on the floor. A single bead of sweat formed on Makoto’s forehead. He flashed them an apologetic smile.

“Y-Yeah, we were just getting ready when you came, that’s all..” he mumbled with a nervous grin. They could faintly hear the rustle of the sheets from within, then a light thud as Haruka planted his feet on the floor. Rei cleared his throat.

“Well, please get dressed and meet us at the hotel restaurant for breakfast. We would like to leave as soon as possible. We have a big day ahead of us!” he said with a polite smile. Makoto nodded obligingly.

“Of course. We’ll be right down,” he promised at once. A few feet behind him, a hand came into view as it reached out for the pillow, then pulled it out of sight. Rei quirked his brow.

“See you at the restaurant, Mako-chan, Haru-chan…” mumbled Nagisa, letting out the yawn he could no longer contain. He turned towards the hall, followed by Rei. Makoto closed the door with a relieved sigh.

The moment he reappeared by the wall, Haru’s pillow smacked against his face and fell down for the second time. Makoto spluttered. Haru now kneeled on his bed, still in his pajama shirt but now clad in jammers, his hand tightening on the pillow he had nicked from Makoto’s bed as he lifted his arm to throw it.

“Don’t you dare—” began Makoto, only to get hit in the chest next. “ _HARUUU!_ ” he wailed with a flail of his arms as the pillow flopped onto the other one below. Haru merely shrugged his shoulders.

“Serves you right,” he said matter-of-factly, but if Makoto had bothered to look as he gathered the pillows from the floor with an exasperated groan, he might have caught a smug smirk in the corner of Haruka’s lips. Makoto bent over to put his pillow back on the bed, then tugged his blanket upward to spread it over the sheets. Haru watched. The smile thinned out between his pursed lips, but its warmth doubled as it relocated to his cheeks.

“I’m going to take a bath,” he said quietly. Makoto squeaked, then turned back to stare at him.

“Eh? A bath? Haru, we don’t have time,” he whined, his tone gradually softening into a plea. Haru gave him a look.

“I always take a bath in the morning,” he replied in a no-nonsense tone. Makoto sighed.

“Haru…” He closed his eyes, his features smoothing out like wind-swept dunes in a desert. “You do realize we’ll be swimming at the stadium soon…”

Haru’s brow twitched. Makoto’s smile widened.

“A pool is bigger than a bathtub,” he cooed with a twitch of his own brow, lighting a spark in Haru’s eyes. They narrowed to a suspicious squint a moment later, but it was no use. As always, Makoto sounded terribly sensible.

“Fine,” sighed Haruka, flashing Makoto a frown as he slid off the bed. “But I’m going to wash up first.”

“The bathroom is all yours while I change,” replied Makoto benignly, then bent over once more to pull out his legskin from the duffel bag. He draped it over the bed, then grabbed the bottom of his shirt with both hands to peel it off. His back rippled as he tensed and relaxed out of the oppressive hold of his shirt. Haru turned his eyes.

“I’m going,” he mumbled as he left for the bathroom with stiff steps, wondering if Makoto was teasing him on purpose.

* * *

The two of them soon joined Rei and Nagisa downstairs for a quick breakfast, after which the Iwatobi Swim Club left for the stadium once again. They arrived in record time, with almost half an hour to spare before they had to line up for the second day opening ceremony, and to their pleasant surprise, a small welcoming committee awaited them by the entrance. There, lined up in a happy row were Coach Sasabe, Amakata Miho, Kou in her Iwatobi Swim Club track outfit, Hanamura Chigusa, and her two friends from the Craft Club, who stood with a large plastic cylinder between them, no doubt containing the custom-made banner.

“It’s Kou-chan!” cried Nagisa, lifting his hand to wave. Kou returned the gesture.

“Good morning, everyone!” she called out to them as they approached.

“Good morning!” replied the boys as they stepped in front of the group, with Haru merely humming in the back. Ama-chan flashed them a cheerful smile.

“We shall be cheering for you,” she said kindly. Kou glanced to Chigusa, who looked to her friends, then gave the manager a firm nod.

“We’ll secure seats for everyone and hang our banner!” said Chigusa with an excited glance at her friends, who hoisted the cylinder under their arms.

“Thank you!” replied Kou with a grateful grin as her friends rushed inside, Ama-chan soon turning after them to lend some authoritative air to any plea the girls would have to make in case the balconies were already full. Coach Sasabe and Kou lingered for a moment longer, the former now tucking his megaphone under his arm as though he were imitating the girls and their too-large plastic cylinder.

“Are you coming in?” he asked.

“The ceremony starts in twenty minutes,” added Kou. Rei checked his watch.

“Ah, you’re right, Kou-san,” he said with a smile as he turned back to his team. “Shall we, then?”

He addressed his words to the captain first and foremost, who turned his head. Rei quirked his brow, but Makoto attempted to follow Haru’s eyes, which seemed to seek another path by the stadium, its row of trees just barely visible from the corner. Makoto furrowed his brow as he tried to remember the particulars of the path, until he at last recalled a practice pool further down. His face softened at the thought.

“Maybe we could walk around a little more first,” he risked with a smile, “to get some more fresh air before we go…”

Haru glanced back to him in surprise. Nagisa turned his head to hide his grin, while Rei cupped his chin.

“Well, I suppose, since the others were kind enough to go and secure seats for us…”

“Go on, then,” said Sasabe. “But don’t be late!”

“We’ll only take a few minutes,” promised Rei at once. Sasabe and Kou nodded, then turned around to head inside. Rei checked his watch again, this time setting an alarm for ten minutes. Beside him, Makoto turned to Haru with a grin.

“Shall we take that path, Haru?” he asked cheekily. Haru turned his head, but a moment later, he bumped his shoulder against Makoto’s arm as they headed towards that row of trees and the practice pool beyond. The others soon formed a loose cluster around him, but when the single cherry tree by the practice pool swam into their view, Haru broke away from the others to walk over to it. He stopped just short of the brick flowerbed, his eyes soaring to the flowerless green crown, then falling to the base that felt oddly lacking. Haru closed his eyes.

_“Are we there yet?” he heard Nagisa say as the four of them made their way across the backyard of Iwatobi Elementary, Rin marching proudly up front, Rei and Nagisa toddling behind him side by side, and Haru drifting after them in a lazy stride._

_“Almost,” promised Rin in a cheeky tone. Haru’s mouth twisted into a frown._

_It seemed so unnecessary, all this hype about sixth grade’s graduation project that, in Haruka’s opinion at least, could not have left a more embarrassing mark on the school grounds. Even if trees were blind and cared not for his opinion or advocacy, Haru still felt offended on behalf the cherry tree, which needed to be the tallest, greatest, most dignified, most secluded of them all. The idea of planting a bunch of random flowers around the base already seemed like a bad joke to Haruka, but the brick bed they built to contain them, then graffitied with colorful messages made it that much worse. It looked like a gaudy bracelet of mismatched clay beads around the naked arm of a colossal dryad: a trinket unworthy of its raw, natural glory._

_Perhaps, had the tree been in full bloom with verdant greens and silk-soft pinks, it would have stolen all attention away from the flowerbed. As things were, the tree still stood naked at the end of March, remaining at the mercy of the rainbow blare of messages handwritten in crayon. Haru and Rin’s messages sat side by side._ Free. For the Team _. Haru had no idea what the latter meant. All he saw was Rin writing his message out in English, then flashing a proud grin at Haruka, who refused to admit how much he struggled in English class when Matsuoka Rin got top marks on all his tests. After two years, Haru could just barely introduce himself and pronounce a handful of words with varying accuracy: free, water, pool, mackerel. He settled for_ Free _. It was fitting enough, but Haru still detested leaving his mark in plain sight. If only the time capsule had won…_

_The fact that Rin had suggested it mattered little. Haru voted for it because unlike any other idea, a time capsule would have been out of sight underneath the ground, safely tucked away from prying eyes. Probably why the idea fell through in the end, and sixth grade ended up with a flowerbed of gaudy bricks._

If Makoto had attended Iwatobi Elementary, what would his brick say..?

_“Here we are!” declared Rin, stopping just a few feet away from the flower bed._

_Nagisa and Rei gathered to his left. Haru reluctantly stood to his right, waiting for Rin to tell Nagisa and Rei all about their dumb graduation project, but Rin lifted his head to stare at the tangle of naked branches in absolute reverie._

_“It’s still not in bloom,” he sighed. Rei, who had been staring at the budding flowers by the base, now looked to Rin as he fixed his glasses._

_“It is still early for most trees to grow full foliage, Rin-senpai,” he said matter-of-factly. Rin sighed louder._

_“I wanted to see it in bloom so badly… and swim in a pool of cherry blossoms..!”_

_“It would also be too cold to swim outdoors until June,” added Rei._

_“Tch. Do you always have to be like that?” griped Rin with an annoyed glare. Nagisa tucked his tiny hands behind his back, swaying on his soles._

_“I think a pool of cherry blossoms would be pretty,” he remarked in an innocent tone, with a single glance at his friend. Rei seemed to waver._

_“I suppose it would be rather beautiful..” he said at last, his words and looks much softened. Haru rolled his eyes._

_“Hey, there’s stuff written on the bricks,” said Nagisa next, finally noticing the true object of their visit. He crouched down to look. Rei walked over, then bent down with a finger against his glasses to keep them from sliding down his nose._

_“That’s our graduation project,” explained Rin with a sweep of his arm, as though he were introducing some prominent character in a play. “We decided to make a flowerbed and write messages on the bricks. That was my idea, by the way,” he added as he propped his hands on his hips._

_“The flowerbed?” asked Nagisa._

_“No, the messages,” replied Rin, pointing a finger at one of the bricks. “This one’s mine.”_

_“What does it say?” asked Nagisa. Rin closed his eyes with a widening smile._

_“For the team,” he said in a warm tone that set Haruka’s heart fluttering inside._

_He never bothered to ask what those words meant before. Well, now he knew… and at that moment, he could finally accept it._

Haru opened his eyes. The soil around the tree now lay barren, while the flowerbed that sought to mark its earthen boundaries bore no messages, none at all…

“Haru-chan!” cried Nagisa some ways away. “Hurry up, hurry up!”

“I’m coming,” replied Haruka, but instead he crouched down to the flowerbed, then reached for a small twig that had been severed from its branch by the wind. He picked it up, pushing its tip into the dirt, and with careful strokes that were guided more by the imprints of his memory than his modest proficiency in English, he wrote, _For the Team_.

 _There._ Now it felt complete.

No one could see what Haru was doing from the way he crouched, so Makoto continued to stare at his back, his lips parting in question. Nagisa glanced to him, then to Haruka, his eyes slowly drifting to the tree.

“Oh, that tree looks just like the one at Iwatobi Elementary!” he said to Rei with a grin. Rei raised his head. He gasped.

“You’re right, Nagisa-kun,” he said in awe, pushing at his glasses with a finger. “They look almost identical.”

Makoto’s lips pursed shut. He had come to walk his siblings home plenty of times from Iwatobi Elementary, but they had never stopped to look at any of the trees, nor could he recall anyone ever mentioning a cherry tree. Rei and Nagisa smiled warmly at Haru. Makoto’s lips curled upward.

 _I’ll just ask Haru later_ , he thought to himself with a light shrug of his shoulders. There was no hurry, after all. Eventually he would learn the whole history with all its little anecdotes, and then Makoto would feel like a stranger no more.

* * *

When Haru finished writing, he set the twig down by his ( _their_ ) message, then straightened so he could walk back to the others.

“We can go now,” he said to Rei, who blinked in surprise, then cancelled the alarm on his watch. A mere two minutes passed. They were well on schedule.

“Of course, Haruka-senpai,” he replied, clearing his throat as he turned to the others. “Well, you heard the captain! Let’s go inside!”

“Alright,” said Makoto and Nagisa in chorus, one calm enough, and the other chipper as can be.

As they walked around the corner, they passed a bus, a pair of dark red eyes following them from one of the windows with a bitter glare until they disappeared inside the building.

* * *

Unsure where to head first, Rei ended up guiding the others towards the stairs, then onto the spectators’ balcony, where they were once more blown away by the sheer size of the stadium’s indoor pool and its enormous seating capacity. Yellow seats clustered into a dozen large blocks on the other side. Banners of all shapes and sizes hung over the railing, most of them announcing the attendance of prestigious sports institutions. Samezuka Academy’s black and gold banner hung to the far right, its block nearly full with students. Indeed, the more they looked, the fewer empty seats they could find in any block.

“It’s packed,” breathed Rei as he and the others stared in awe. At that moment, standing together, yesterday’s defeat dispersed from their hearts like morning mist, and a new day with newfound chances dawned on the Iwatobi Swim Club.

“There you are!” they heard Sasabe’s voice as he walked over to them with Kou in tow, one holding his megaphone and the other, the printed program for the day. The others nodded to them, but Haru’s eyes flitted back to the opposite balcony, darting left and right with a tense expression.

Makoto noticed first, and though the realization pained him, no pang he felt was strong enough to overcome his happiness for once. He could tell his smile lacked luster, but even in defeat, it had its warmth and felt genuine enough. For now, that much would do.

“Seems like Rin isn’t here yet,” he said to his friend quietly, turning his gaze to the pool the moment Haru tried to catch his eyes. “I’m sure he’ll show up soon.”

Haru stared at him surprised for a moment. Was Makoto reading his mind? The idea was as likely as the next, but whether he believed that such a thing was possible or not, Makoto’s words brought a small, grateful smile to Haruka’s face.

“Yeah,” he replied in a voice that sounded calm, even cheerful in its own way as he propped his arms on the railing, his eyes drifting from Samezuka’s banner to the pool. Makoto’s smile faded.

A moment later, he felt a tug at his arm. It was Kou. Makoto blinked at her confused, but stepped backwards as Kou pulled him away from Haru.

“Makoto-senpai,” she whispered, eyes darting to Nagisa in the hopes that no one was listening, especially not the nosier boys. “Did my brother talk to you yesterday?”

Makoto paled. _So that’s how Rin got my number_ , he thought as he lowered his head and steeled himself, forcing another smile for Kou’s sake.

“He did,” he replied, and when she looked on in curiosity, Makoto added, “We just agreed to do our best for our teams today.”

Kou’s features relaxed. Makoto could feel his shoulders slump.

A few feet away, a small figure swam into the corner of his eye.

“We got seats for everyone and prepared the banner,” they heard Chigusa say. Kou turned away from Makoto at once to face her friend.

“Thank you!” she replied cheerfully.

“Let’s get going then!” said Sasabe with a grin. Rei and Nagisa glanced at each other with worried looks.

“If we win today, we’ll make it to nationals,” said Rei, his tone thick as his eyes fell to the pool and its handful of swimmers.

“Can we win?” whispered Nagisa, his brow furrowed. Behind them, Sasabe whipped up his megaphone with a scowl.

“ _HEY!_ ” he roared at them, causing nearby spectators to twitch and stare in shock. The boys looked to him sweating. Sasabe lowered the megaphone.

“Don’t wuss out now!” he told them with a shake of his fist. “Stop worrying about the outcome! Just be free. Swim to your hearts’ content! Swim so you have no regrets!”

At his words, the others thawed and exchanged excited glances, until even Makoto grinned in nothing short of anticipation.

“Yes!” they cried in chorus.

Below them, Chigusa’s friends draped the banner over the railing, carefully fastening the corners. Kou hurried over to help them, but just as they managed to secure a corner, her phone started vibrating furiously in her pocket. She apologized to the girls, then stopped to check her messages.

_1 New Message_

_From: Captain Mikoshiba_

**MAY THE BEST TEAM WIN! S.**

Kou cracked a spirited grin as she texted back,

_WE WILL NEVER LOSE TO SAMEZUKA!_

She hit _Send_ , then turned to look over to the other side. Though she could just barely make out a small red-headed figure in the distance, she lifted her hand to wave. Her phone pinged again.

**I hope there will be no hard feelings. Yours, S.**

_Of course not!_ she wrote back at once.

How could she have known…?

* * *

Back on the bus, Matsuoka Rin remained to his seat, his eyes now fixed on the backrest in front of him in a helpless glare. Everyone else had long gone inside to hang the Samezuka banner from the railing, but Nitori stayed behind of course, to plague him like he always did.

In truth, Aiichiro intended to go with the others, but climbed back on board when he realized Rin was still missing. He now stood by his side, effectively locking him into place, and while Rin originally wanted to linger in his seat in silence, the way Nitori inadvertently blocked his only exit began to irritate him like a nasty itch.

Unlike him, Aiichiro caught no glimpse of the Iwatobi Swim Club on the way, but he didn’t have to. News of Rin’s exclusion from the medley relay reached him at breakfast through word of mouth like it did everyone else, though he could not manage to engage his senpai in any meaningful way while they ate. Only now did he dare approach the subject, with no small degree of uncertainty. Would his words help cheer up his senpai, or only make things worse? He never knew until he tried.

“Matsuoka-senpai… um…” he began, forcing a smile braver than he felt. “Please cheer up, Senpai! You’ll get another shot at the relay at nationals. Our school will definitely advance!”

Rin’s eyes narrowed to grim slits. Aiichiro’s brows rose in hopeful arches.

“So, Senpai, you should just focus on your one-hundred meter free today, and forget about the relay—” continued Aiichiro in that same reassuring tone, noticing a moment too late how Rin gritted his teeth like a cornered animal. A moment later, Rin bolted up from his seat and nearly collided with Aiichiro, who instinctively whipped up his arm to cover his face.

“ _Shut up!_ ” snapped Rin, tearing past Nitori towards the front exit. Aiichiro’s arm dropped as he watched him leave, his shoulders sinking in growing despondence.

“Senpai…” he whispered. Nobody heard him.

* * *

The loudspeakers soon screeched to life in an announcement, requesting that all swimmers gather by the pool for the opening ceremony. The Iwatobi Swim Club had since been shown their prospective seats, which they abandoned to head back downstairs. There they were ushered by the organizers to one end of the pool, eventually forming a column in the middle.

They could tell with a glance that they were the smallest group present. The column beside them counted five swimmers, while some teams formed two columns of up to fifteen members each. They all faced a table by the pool, laden with sound equipment so the main organizer could deliver his speech for all to hear.

“I’m sure everyone here has been practicing hard for this day…” began the man in a low, solemn tone, immediately losing Haruka’s attention to Rin’s figure in the distance, some nine columns away from the Iwatobi Swim Club. Haru could feel his spine stiffen and his features harden as he sought the other’s eyes, but Rin seemed to stare at the tiles by his feet, hunched like a marionette on broken wires.

“…This tournament is your opportunity to show that your hard work has paid off.”

“Hey, which one is your brother?” Chigusa asked Kou as both leaned over the railing to get a better look. Kou lifted a finger to point.

“Um, he’s on Samezuka’s…” she began to say, until she realized that everyone’s heads were held high except Rin’s, who hung his mournfully.

Kou’s arms broke out in goose bumps.

**_I hope there will be no hard feelings._ **

_No, he cannot mean…_

“Onii-chan…” she whispered. Chigusa stared at her in apprehension.

Spurred by a sense of unease, Kou flipped open the program they received that morning and jabbed a finger at _Men’s One-Hundred Meter Freestyle,_ brushing it down the page until she found _Matsuoka Rin_ listed in Heat Three. Kou’s shoulders slumped as she let out a sigh of relief. Perhaps Onii-chan was merely anxious, or so fixated on his upcoming event that he simply had no capacity to observe decorum, and Captain Mikoshiba was just teasing her like competitive spirits tend to do…

She dropped the program on top of her bag, then sank back in her seat, clasping her hands firmly in her lap. _Time will tell_ , she reassured herself, and besides, the one-hundred meter freestyle was the day’s first event. It would not be long before Onii-chan stepped on top of Block Four… and for now, cheering him on was all that mattered.


	63. EPISODE 12: Distant Free! - Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end of the opening ceremony saw Iwatobi and Samezuka parting in opposite directions, but while the Iwatobi Swim Club returned to the spectators’ balcony in full, Samezuka Academy eventually lost Matsuoka Rin to the stadium’s anthill corridors. He could not stand the thought of being around his peers anymore. Their knowing glances seemed drawn to Rin, as though last night’s disclosure had branded him. The idea sickened him to his core, but when he considered the possibility that the _others_ might have found out his disgrace as well, the thought of having to sit in plain sight, then swim in front of everyone alone and denied twisted Rin’s stomach tighter still.

On the verge of a panic attack, he clenched his jaws and screwed his eyes shut. He needed to stop thinking. He needed to be alone, as he was always meant to be.

As Samezuka left the pool area, Rin gradually slackened his pace to drift apart from the group, then dodged behind the first available corner, pressing his back against the wall until the footsteps of his teammates ebbed away. Silence crept upon him, breathing down his neck as Rin took to the hallways, roaming aimlessly until he came across the locker rooms, where a few swimmers were preparing for the first heat of the hundred meter freestyle. Rin narrowed his eyes at their banter, so cheerful and carefree it grated on his nerves.

Having convinced himself that all he could do was idle until his final race, Rin shrank away into the next corridor, throwing himself down on a nearby bench. He closed his eyes. The world sank into dreary silence as apathy poured over him like melted wax, until no thought, innocent or troubling, could reach his consciousness. As soon as they took timid flight, the white glare of his mind snuffed them out. A large, round clock overhead kept ticking stubbornly against the vacuum, but the seconds continued to pass Rin by, no more than the drum of rain drops on an empty shell.

He would wait there, calm, quiet. When the time came, he would swim… and if he could just make it one more time, he would survive.

* * *

When Rin finally rose to his feet again, roused more by some innate alarm than a rekindled touch with reality, his numb skin crawled at the touch of the ceramic tiles. With stiff steps he made his way to the locker room, hiding himself at the end of the first row, where he dug his bearings out of his duffel bag and changed in silence, ignoring his fellow competitors undressing just a few meters away.

He tucked his pants and shoes into the back of the locker, then shoved his duffel bag after them. The bag’s zipper got caught midway. Rin huffed in annoyance as he yanked the bag backwards, sinking his hand inside for the offending obstacle. His breath hitched.

It was that age-worn photograph of Toraichi’s relay team with their trophy and gold medals, grinning up at him in glory eternal long gone except for a sheet of tattered film. Rin sneered in helpless anger as he crammed the photo back inside the bag. A moment later, the locker door slammed shut, banishing Toraichi into the darkness.

* * *

 _Men’s one-hundred meter freestyle, heat three,_ announced one of the organizers over the stadium speakers as the electronic billboard flashed black, then rearranged itself for the next stage of the event. The Iwatobi Swim Club now sat on the balcony with their elders behind them and the girls gathering in the front, standing guard over the banner as they waited in mounting impatience for Rin to appear. Makoto and Haruka parked themselves at the end of the row, in clear view of the pool, while Nagisa and Rei had to strain their necks to see anything beyond the backs of their cheerleaders, yet Nagisa was still the first to spot their former teammate as Rin broke away from the other swimmers on his way to the pool.

“There’s Rin-chan!” he said with a grin, shifting from his seat for a better look. Rei’s lips twitched into an excited smile. Makoto’s heart made an anxious leap.

“Yeah,” replied Haru, brow furrowed in anticipation and his eyes fixed on Rin as he stepped onto the block, then assumed his position. The gloom that hung over him at the opening ceremony seemed gone, displaced by the sharp, deadly focus of a seasoned veteran.

Back on the balcony, Kou lifted her hands to her mouth.

“ _Onii-chan, you can do it!_ ” she cried at the top of her lungs, but Rin showed no sign of having heard her. His eyes remained fixed forward, drinking in the sight of the pool to drown out the static in his head, but a faint echo of his sister’s voice now lingered over the shimmering surface of the water. If she was up there somewhere, the others had to be there too…

_Ready…_

Was _Haru_ watching him?

_Set._

Could he see it too…?

**_Go!_ **

Rin froze for the fraction of a second as he imagined that pair of dark blue eyes glaring at him from above. The next moment, airborne silhouettes shot into his vision on both sides, startling Rin out of his stupor and forcing him to hurl himself forward in pursuit. It all happened in the blink of an eye, yet Rin already seemed a body’s length behind the others by the time he entered the water.

Makoto’s heart jumped wildly. That moment of hesitation, of Rin lifting his head ever so slightly felt horribly familiar…

“A late start?” blurted Rei nearby, his hands tightening on the edges of his seat.

“Rin can make it up on the turn!” Makoto heard Haruka say. A moment later, as if equally stunned by their swimmer’s late entry, the entire Samezuka block raised their megaphones to chant in encouragement, led in their cheers by Mikoshiba Seijuurou.

“And… Go!” he roared.

“ **Go!** ” they shouted in reply. _Go! **Go!** Go! **Go!**_

“Go! _Go! **Go!**_ ” cried Aiichiro above the rest, but despite Rin’s efforts, the distance between him and the other swimmers grew with every passing second. He tumbled last at the turn, then launched away from the wall with all his might, but not even his fabled kick could close the gap, leaving him two body lengths behind the rest.

“ _And turn!_ Last spurt, last spurt, last spurt!” shouted Samezuka, while the Iwatobi Swim Club watched on in stunned silence, their insides squirming in disbelief.

“Rin…” whispered Haru, his brow creased.

“What’s wrong? This isn’t his usual form..!” cried Rei, nudging at his glasses roughly as if his vision were to blame for the unexpected sight. Beside him, Makoto stared in silence, the churn of his stomach so violent it took his breath away. Where was the Matsuoka Rin of last night, who warned Makoto not to embarrass himself or his teammates, only to break apart like this in front of everyone..?

“Last spurt, _last spurt, **last spurt!**_ ” cried the Samezuka block, but Seijuurou no longer joined them. He merely watched with a grim frown as his suspicions about Matsuoka were confirmed in the most grievous way. Down below, Rin continued to claw forward, choking on water with every desperate reach of his arms, but it no longer looked like a race. No… it was merely a wretched struggle not to drown.

 _It’s over…_ he thought, and so did Rin, his heart and dreams broken beyond repair. If Toraichi was still watching him even from the darkness, seeing his son fall to his doom so close to his goal was probably enough to break his heart and kill him all over again.

“Last spurt, _last spurt, **last spurt!**_ ” demanded Samezuka.

 _Enough…_ breathed Rin.

_No more._

Samezuka continued to cheer him on until the last moment, but everyone else watched in agony as Rin staggered forward to reach the wall, finishing several seconds behind the others. By the time he came in last place, he was heaving uncontrollably. Upstairs, the girls shot frightened glances at Kou, who stared at her brother petrified.

“What happened to Rin?” asked Sasabe behind them.

“Onii-chan…” whispered Kou, unable to answer him.

Down below, Rin slid his hands onto the edge to hoist himself up, but just as he reached his peak, his arms gave out from under him, crumpling over the concrete as his lower half slid back into the water. His hands curled into helpless fists. He planted them one more time, even managing to press his knee against the edge, but at the slightest shift of his weight, he dropped back again, his back visibly convulsing in the effort.

Haru stared at him in horror, eyes wide and cheeks pale as time looped backwards and trapped him under the block after that fateful race. At the time, he felt so overwhelmed by grief he couldn’t move, but Rin, Rin actually struggled against the paralysis of defeat. The two of them always seemed so strikingly different, almost irreconcilable in all their ways, yet Haru had no doubt in his heart that Rin’s pain, the crushing realization of having lost something precious and irreplaceable, was no different from his own…

Spurred by the urge to prevent the damage his younger self could not, Haru tore himself away from his seat, making a dash for the nearest exit. Sasabe and Ama-chan stared after him in shock, but Makoto twitched to his feet a moment later.

“Haru!” he cried as he leaped onto the stairs to chase after Haruka.

“I’m going with him!” sprung up Nagisa.

“Me too!” cried Rei a moment later, the three of them disappearing in a flash.

Opposite them, Aiichiro rushed past his captain to follow suit, and the moment her shock wore off, Kou turned around as well, but as soon as her hand slipped from the railing, another one grabbed her wrist to pull her back.

“Wait, Gou!” said Chigusa in a worried tone. “If they find him, they might come back!”

The look in Kou’s eyes told her she doubted her friend’s optimism, but not knowing where to look or what to do, Kou resigned herself to waiting for them by the railing.

* * *

When Rin finally managed to clamber out of the pool, he stumbled into another nightmare where minutes oozed in shapeless blobs, blurring the contours of reality. The cries of spectators shrank to unintelligible murmurs in his ears. Organizers and fellow swimmers stared at him blankly, no more than faceless figures in his vision, dodging out of his path as he lurched towards the exit.

He treaded empty hallways like an alien landscape. He vaguely recalled the needle pricks of water dripping from his hair onto his bare chest as he crossed the tiles, yet soon enough a black shirt stretched across his wet skin, his feet uncomfortably damp in his sneakers. The door of his locker swung open. After another stretch of eternity, a strap dug into his shoulders. Just how many dead dreams did he carry in that duffel bag? The numbness crawling in his arm told him it was too many.

He then found himself roaming the main corridor than ran around the entire structure, half bright, half shrouded between sun-lit glass and painted concrete. _That’s right_ , he was leaving all of this behind. Regionals, the relay… Haru… _everything._

“Senpai! _Matsuoka-senpai!_ ” he heard Nitori yell behind him as a flurry of footsteps grew louder and ever closer. Rin pressed on mechanically, but only for a few more meters. When Aiichiro caught up with him at last, he latched onto Rin’s jacket sleeve with one hand, clenching tight until the fabric snagged at Rin’s next step.

“Please wait!” he demanded. Rin stopped obediently, his back turned on Nitori, standing still in the hope that their unfortunate encounter might end sooner if he complied for a little while. Aiichiro took one look at Rin’s slackened shoulders and released his sleeve, glad his senpai agreed to listen to him.

“It’s okay!” he began, trying to gather the words he had been mulling over as he searched all around the stadium for his idol. “You just happened to have a bad day. Your talent is the real deal!”

Rin gritted his teeth unseen. _Talent? What talent..?!_

“If you had been in better condition, you could have—”

“ _Shut up!_ ” snapped Rin as he whipped his fist around and slammed it full force against the glass, startling Aiichiro into silence.

A turn away, the Iwatobi Swim Club flinched to a halt.

“Was that…?” asked Nagisa. Makoto and Haru exchanged glances while Rei turned towards the direction of the sound, thoroughly glad they had only a single corridor to follow.

“This way!” he cried as he broke into a sprint, the others running close behind him.

The next turn brought them to another long stretch of hallway, where they finally spotted two figures facing each other by a pair of large vending machines. Aiichiro, who had since overcome his initial fright, now stood with his hands clasped around Rin’s wrist, who let himself be restrained more out of surprise than any desire to be pacified.

Standing so close as they did, the two of them seemed completely oblivious of having attracted an audience, one that now watched their every move like a hawk.

“Senpai! Please calm down!” pleaded Nitori, his hands tightening around Rin’s wrist. “If you do this, you won’t be allowed to participate in the next tournament!”

“ _It doesn’t matter!_ ” howled Rin as another burst of pain surged through him, goading him to lash out and destroy even as a small voice deep down implored him not to hurt the one person who came to take his side. Still, the itch, that raw smell of metal in his nostrils grew stronger, until Nitori’s hands burned his skin where they touched. Rin jerked his arm up and towards the other to shake him loose, knowing all too well that Nitori would twitch out of harm’s way in time, whether his reflexes were naturally good or honed by years of fearful self-defense.

“I don’t give a damn about what happens!” he carried on at the top of his lungs, no longer able to stop even as Nitori stared at him bewildered. “I’m obviously no better than this! That’s why I was taken off the relay!”

His fists clenched again, nails digging into his palm. Nitori’s eyes seemed to plead him, but Rin had nothing more to give – not to him or anybody else.

“Forget it! _I quit!_ ” he screamed into the other’s face, but refusing to unleash the full force of his rage on Nitori to the very last, he turned on the trashcan behind himself instead, slamming his foot into it as hard as he could. “ ** _I’m done swimming!_** ”

The trashcan took flight, bounced off the floor once, then rolled onto its side with a clang, vomiting trash all over the floor. Nitori froze, shoulders stiff and arms pulled inward as he instinctively braced himself for another blow, but the sight of his small, huddled form by that sea of garbage seemed to sober Rin at last. Unable to stare at his handiwork, the aftermath of yet another senseless tantrum that changed nothing and left him feeling infinitely worse, Rin hung his head, tucking his hands away in his pockets. He then left with his back hunched in shame, his steps so quiet it took Aiichiro a moment to realize that Rin started moving again, towards a future they might no longer get to share.

“Matsuoka-senpai!” Aiichiro cried as he took a step after him, a wad of paper crunching underfoot. He swallowed nervously. Even if Senpai was understandably hurt, he had left a nasty mess… _What if someone saw?_

Ever so carefully, he turned his head to check for unwanted spectators, eyes widening at the Iwatobi Swim Club staring back at him in absolute shock. Nitori’s brow furrowed in guilt, but when they showed no sign of coming forward, whether to reprimand them for their actions or stop Matsuoka-senpai from throwing away his dreams, Aiichiro’s face scrunched up in disappointment, then determination. There was no time for regret. If his former friends wouldn’t come and save Senpai, then Aiichiro would. After all, what were faithful kouhai for?

And so he turned his back on the others and ran, ran down the corridor to chase after Rin, leaving Haru and the others thunderstruck.

* * *

Back at the pool, the girls remained by the railing to watch the next heat of freestyle, though Kou no longer found any enjoyment in the sight. Her eyes dimmed as they followed the swimmer in lane four, an unknown successor to her fallen brother. Next to her, Chigusa was browsing the program for the upcoming relay heats, hoping to reassure Kou that her brother would be making his comeback soon enough. She found Samezuka in Heat Two… _here we go…_

Her brow creased in confusion. Four swimmers listed, yet she could not recognize a single name.

“Gou, look at this,” she said as she passed Kou the program, her thumb pressed to Samezuka’s line-up. Kou’s eyes widened as she read the names.

“What..?” she blurted in shock, fear coiling in her heart. “It can’t be!”

The next moment, Kou shoved the program back in Chigusa’s hands, whirling around to pry her phone out of her bag. She dialed, then lifted the phone to her ear. It only rang once.

“Kou-san,” came Mikoshiba’s voice from the other end, quiet and unnaturally reserved. Kou’s gaze flitted to the Samezuka benches. She could just barely make out his figure by the top right corner of the yellow block, having withdrawn from his teammates to speak to her in relative privacy.

“Why isn’t my brother listed for the relay?” demanded Kou, her voice verging on panic. There was a pause. Seijuurou drew a deep breath.

“I judged it best that he concentrate on his freestyle event,” he replied at last, speaking as calmly as though he were merely explaining a scientific formula. “Matsuoka seemed serious about swimming the relay when he first asked me to include him, but he paid no attention to his team and his times kept increasing. At Samezuka Academy, only the fastest swimmers have the right to swim in the medley relay. I had no other choice.”

“But, _why—_ ”

“I don’t ask for your forgiveness, Kou-san,” carried on Seijuurou in that same passionless tone he now struggled to keep even. “You put your trust in me and I betrayed it. After two weeks of training, I took your brother off the relay team. But I appeal to you as the manager of a swim club to understand that I did it for the team. You saw what happened at the one-hundred meter freestyle. Put yourself in my place, Kou-san! If worse came to worst and you had to sacrifice a single member to save the entire team, I know you too would do it in a heartbeat.”

“Sacrifice.. a member…” echoed Kou. Silence followed, a pained, uncomfortable silence.

“I hope there are no hard feelings between us,” murmured Seijuurou. Kou’s breath hitched.

She screwed her eyes shut as if that could crush the tears welling up in the corners, but they merely split along her lashes and dropped down her cheeks all the same.

“There are no hard feelings, Captain Mikoshiba…” she forced the words out with a hiss, “…because now that you’ve taken my brother off the relay, _we will **definitely beat you!**_ ”

She punched _End Call_ , then tossed the phone into her bag, her now empty hands curled into trembling fists. One look at her and Chigusa shrank back into her seat, while Kou remained by the railing, her glare burning holes into Samezuka’s black and gold banner.

“We’ll show you…” she seethed under her breath, oblivious of how the others were staring at her in awed concern. _And you’re wrong. Our team would never do that…_

_Never._

* * *

Back at the corridor, time stood still. Once even Aiichiro’s footsteps faded away, all that remained in the wake of Rin’s stormy outburst was a stretch of floor littered with trash. Some ways away, the four boys stood perfectly still, their feet congealed to the tiles.

“Rin-chan.. was taken out of the relay…?” echoed Nagisa, his voice paper-thin.

“I don’t understand… Rin-senpai was still listed in the program yesterday,” said Rei with his brow furrowed. “But if this is true, then we have lost our chance to race him…”

Makoto’s stomach dropped in dreadful apprehension. Chills ran down his spine as he turned back to Haru, who stared into space devastated.

“Haru…” whispered Makoto. Those large, blank eyes widened.

 _I’m done swimming!_ screamed Rin’s voice in the back of Haruka’s mind, until it grew hoarse and fragile and terribly young as it whispered, _I’ll never swim again._

Haru’s hands grew lax by his side. A moment later, he stumbled backwards and collapsed into a heap on the floor, his head buried in the folds of his arms.

“Haru!” cried Makoto.

He took a step closer. A broken whisper reached his ears.

“I won’t get to swim with Rin again?” came Haruka’s voice in painful disbelief, stopping Makoto in his tracks.

“Haru-chan…” mumbled Nagisa behind him.

“Haruka-senpai…” whispered Rei as well, the two of them staring alarmed at their captain.

“What do we do now?” blurted Nagisa next, suddenly conscious of how little time they had left. “The relay prelims are about to start.”

“We must focus on our own race right now!” replied Rei, sounding strangely unsure.

“But look at Haru-chan…” said Nagisa. Beside him, Makoto stared wide-eyed.

 _The relay…_ they might have lost their chance to race Rin, but they could still swim together, if they could just get Haru back on his feet. After all, he still had his teammates, who were just as important to him as Rin, were they not?

_I’ll be fine… after all, Makoto is with me. Swimming with you… made me just as happy!_

The words once spoken at the festival set Makoto’s heart fluttering with hope. They had always told him to believe in his worth, so he would. He would believe that for now, he was enough. After a deep breath, Makoto tried for a smile braver than he felt, then turned to Haruka once more, taking another a step towards him.

“Haru…” he said softly, extending a hand towards his best friend.

Haru’s shoulders tensed as he lifted his head just barely to glance up at the other. Makoto’s fingers twitched invitingly towards him, yet seemed a hundred miles away, hovering above the chasm Haru had plunged into from the edge, surrendering himself to despair that felt more familiar and forgiving than brittle hope ever had. Though Haru wrenched himself away for a while, the emptiness that had kept him company all these years reached out its arms just the same, ready to embrace him…

…and so Haru dropped his head back into his arms, too weak to take Makoto’s hand.

Makoto’s blood ran cold. His fingers, now trembling, twitched forward one more time as the voice at the back of his mind stirred, tainted by the echoes of painful memories.

**_No matter what I do, I’m just not good enough._ **

_Haru!_

**_You said it yourself: you are nothing more than filler!_ **

_Don’t let it win…!_

**_Nobody gives a damn about you, Haru included!_ **

_Please. . ._

But Haru just wouldn’t move.

Slowly, Makoto’s hand fell to his side in defeat. For a moment, the urge to run after Rin, to grab him by his shoulders and slam him against the wall hard enough to knock some sense into him flitted in and out of his consciousness, then dissolved into mist as he realized the futility of his desire to do something, _anything_ not to feel so useless to Haru.

Sure, he could catch up with Rin and overpower him if he had to, but what had violence ever changed for the better? And suppose he tried to talk to Rin instead, what could Makoto ever hope to accomplish, when the only ones who stood any chance of getting through to these broken souls were each other?

Close as Makoto felt to the core of their problems, in the end, he still found himself banished to the margins, watching in growing wretchedness as Rin ran away just like he had before, leaving Haru stranded and hopelessly plummeting into the depths.

Would it always have to be this way? Would Makoto have to see his best friend fall and collapse over and over and over again, for as long as they lived..?

 _No… Never again_ , flared a small, stubborn spark inside him.

After a long moment of silence, Makoto took a deep breath to steel himself. His crumbling heart warned that this might be his limit, but so close to the end of the world, Makoto had no time to mourn what was never meant to be. He had made up his mind long ago, and once determined, he never turned back. If that was what it took to save Haru, Makoto would break his fall and shatter in his place, one last time.

“Haru,” he spoke again, his voice no longer so soft as urgent as he reached out his hand again, though he no longer waited for Haru to take it. Instead his fingers clasped around Haruka’s arm, pulling insistently. “Get up. You’re going to go after him.”

Haruka flinched at his words and lifted his head, staring at the other perplexed.

“Why..?” he blurted, eyes wide and cheeks pale. Makoto clenched his jaw.

“Because this is your last chance to swim with Rin, and if you don’t go, I know you will regret it for the rest of your life,” he replied, forcing himself to look Haru in the eye. “And not because you hurt Rin. You _never did_. I know because he told me he didn’t quit in middle school because of you.”

Haru stared back at him in guilt and confusion. Even Rei and Nagisa looked surprised.

“Mako-chan..?” mumbled Nagisa. Makoto turned to him next, his hand falling from Haru’s arm to his side as he straightened.

“Remember how I said I went on a run last night?” he said quietly. “I’m sorry I lied to you. Just after Haru left to go on a run, Rin sent me a message to meet him on the hill’s lookout point, so I went to see him. That’s when he told me he had hit a wall while training in Australia. It shook his confidence, so when he returned to Iwatobi during the holidays, he challenged Haru to a race in the hopes of seeing some progress after all. When he lost, his disappointment in himself was just so great that he wanted to quit swimming for good. Or, at least he thought he did, until he raced Haru again, and had a breakthrough. And he also said…” Makoto’s throat bobbed sharply, “that seeing us swim together at regionals.. made him want to swim in a relay again.”

As he spoke, Haru’s eyes gradually widened, lighting up with something akin to hope. Opposite him, Nagisa and Rei exchanged meaningful glances.

“Then… I was _right_ ,” blurted Rei, his hand trembling as he fixed his glasses. “I know Rin-senpai had been acting cold and aloof towards us, but something about his actions told me he had been missing us just as much as we missed him…”

“He probably had,” said Makoto, his own voice dull. “The truth is, I don’t think he cared about the race at all. He just wanted to swim with you again, to swim with the best friends he ever had, so he could heal.”

To his surprise, Haru clenched his fists, then slowly rose from the floor to face him.

“How do you know that?” he demanded in a tone too shaky to be anything but a plea. Makoto lowered his eyes.

“Because… that’s what I wanted, too,” he replied, unaware of how Nagisa and Rei stared at him in nothing short of awe. “After all we’ve been through, I wanted nothing more than to swim a relay with all of you, the best friends _I_ ever had.”

Haru’s fists went limp, his lips quivering in silence. Makoto lifted his head, forcing himself to look Haru in the eye once more. He struggled. And yet, it had to be done.

“Haru,” he began, his throat threatening to close, “I know you said swimming with me made you just as happy, but you really want to swim with _him_ , right?”

Haru flushed, his heart humming so fast it threatened to burst.

“I…” he whispered, unable to say it. Makoto’s hands clenched into fists by his side.

“It’s _fine!_ ” he cried out, hoping to convince himself, too. “I promise it’s _fine!_ I know everyone hoped we would make nationals, but this is more important than a slightly bigger budget or a cheap, reused banner at school! If you don’t do something right now, Rin really will stop swimming because he can’t go on like this… and Haru, neither can you.”

“But what am I supposed to do?” mumbled Haruka, subconsciously shrinking from the answer Makoto had found, but his friend could no longer bear to hold him back.

“Don’t you understand..?” he told Haru, at pains to keep his voice even. “If this is what it takes for both of you to heal, then you have to take your chance and swim this relay together.”

Nagisa and Rei stared at him breathlessly. Haru’s jaw dropped. The words he thought he would never hear now hung crystallized in the air, awaiting his answer.

“But.. what about you?” he pleaded on the threshold, still scared. Makoto gritted his teeth. Even through the numbness in his chest, he could feel his heart crack.

“I’ll wait!” he cried, his mouth scorched dry. “I’ll wait forever if I have to! But _this can’t_ _wait!_ This is your last chance, Haru! If swimming with Rin is the answer you’ve been searching for, you’ll finally be free! And if it’s not, then at least you’ve tried everything, and knowing that you did, you’ll be able to move on someday! Do you want to drag this behind you for the rest of your life?!”

Haru’s eyes shrank to pained slits. Makoto’s gleamed like broken glass.

“Then _go!_ ” he cried, swinging an arm in the direction Rin had left. “Go, before…”

_Before I get so weak I change my mind._

“…before he leaves.”

“Makoto-san..” breathed Rei, his tone strained. “I appreciate what you’re trying to do, but we cannot let you—”

“Then why did you ask me to join the swim club in the first place?!” retorted Makoto, his hands trembling. “You needed me because you wanted to swim with your friends, right? That is the reason I joined. That’s why I worked so hard all along – I did what I did so everyone could be happy! What good am I as filler if I can’t even give you that?!”

“Mako-chan…” whispered Nagisa, though his eyes shimmered in excitement despite himself.

“Are you really fine with this…?” asked Rei, for Haru lowered his head, unable to speak.

At that moment, Makoto couldn’t either, but for one fraction of a second, he could feel a flicker of warmth in his heart. After all… they cared enough to ask him…

“ _Never mind me!_ ” he snapped at them, hoping his denial sounded like bravery. “Let’s go!”

And with that, Makoto broke into a run down the corridor, to hunt down Rin before it really was too late.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Original note when this chapter came out: "Happy birthday to me, and happy birthday to this story. Thank you all for waiting for me. I'll make sure to finish this. Just you wait!"


	64. EPISODE 12: Distant Free! - Part 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As Makoto raced down the corridor with the others in tow, up at the spectators’ balcony, Kou’s burning resentment towards Captain Mikoshiba gradually gave way to chills of apprehension. The medley relays were drawing ever closer, and with them, the allotted time within which all teams were required to report to the pool area grew less and less. All relay teams competing in Heat One had already confirmed their attendance, and some of the relay teams in Heat Two had since joined their ranks, including Samezuka Academy’s four fastest swimmers, while the Iwatobi Swim Club was still nowhere to be seen.

Their supporters waited almost ten minutes for their return, time enough to shred even nerves of steel. Kou was gradually forced to divide her time between her grudge and anxiety, and for every glare dispatched towards the Samezuka benches, she sent a concerned look over her shoulder at the exit in the back. Ama-chan, who had been perusing the program, eventually put it down so she could wring her hands unobstructed. Chigusa’s friends broke into avid whispers among themselves, to be hushed by their friend with more force than was strictly necessary… until Sasabe, who could no longer bear to be idle, or pace between the exit and the railing anymore, offered to look for the boys, then hurried off as soon as the ladies had consented.

Sasabe’s departure gave even Kou fresh hope that the race might still take place, even if it no longer comprehended her brother. Whether the swimmers themselves were conscious of the passage of time or not, the others could at least prevail on their dependable coach to keep the program in mind, and usher the lost sheep to the pool area as soon as he discovered them. However, in such expectations, they were dreadfully disappointed. The Iwatobi Swim Club now had fifteen minutes to return if they wanted to swim at all, yet instead of finally making their reappearance, it was Sasabe and Sasabe alone who burst through the balcony exit, then nearly collapsed as he skidded to a halt by their seats.

“It’s no good, I can’t find them anywhere!” he huffed, hands grasping his knees as he doubled over. A few feet away, Ama-chan picked up the program again, though having studied it so much, she knew the contents almost by heart.

“The medley relay swimmers are supposed to report to the pool area right now,” she said, turning to Kou. “If they don’t return soon, they’ll be disqualified..!”

“No way!” cried Kou. As a last resort, she spun around, dug her phone out of her bag, then dialed Rei’s number, trusting their pragmatic vice-captain to have taken his phone with him. She tapped her foot in wait, until a faint buzz, then a muffled melody hit their ears: one of the abandoned Iwatobi bags behind them. Sasabe pressed a heavy hand to his face.

Kou hit _End Call_ , then dialed the other three one by one, to be answered by a different bag every single time.

* * *

When Makoto rushed down the corridor to chase after Rin, the others, still bewildered by all that had transpired, could do no more than follow him in silence, and open every single door along the way in the hopes of discovering Rin. They were out of luck, however: _He’s not here_ soon became a catchphrase among them. No matter where the doors led, no matter where they turned, there was no trace of Rin or even Nitori, as if both had completely vanished from the building.

“He’s not here, either,” said Haru, who happened upon a deserted locker room this time. Makoto gritted his teeth.

“Let’s split up and search that way!” he told the others. “I’ll take the rest of the corridor!”

“I’ll take that exit!” replied Nagisa, pointing to a large glass door to their right that led to a shaded avenue.

“I will check this hallway!” said Rei, who took a few steps towards the opening of a corridor to Makoto’s left, then turned back to their captain. “Haruka-senpai?”

Haru hesitated, but only for a moment.

“I’ll come with you,” he told Rei, glimpsing another exit further down his chosen hallway. We can split up outside.”

“Got it!”

Their directions settled, Nagisa shoved his shoulder against the glass door, letting it slam closed behind him as he dashed down the right-side avenue. Back in the building, Haru and Rei took to the left hallway, while Makoto sprinted forward, his left arm whipped upward to check his watch. His brow furrowed. _There’s not much time…!_

“ _Rin,_ where are—” he cried out, the words cut off as the next turn brought him colliding with something painfully solid to his left. Makoto staggered wildly to the right, but his momentum carried him forward, leaving him just enough time to register that his elbow had knocked against someone taller than himself, someone sturdy and dark who wasn’t Rin.

“Excuse me!” he blurted at the stranger as he sprinted off, unaware that he was followed, however briefly, by a pair of storming eyes.

* * *

“Rin-chaaan!” wailed Nagisa as he scrambled down the lush green avenue to the right of the stadium, startling a flock of pigeons into flight.

“ _Rin-senpaaai!_ ” hollered Rei on his way around the back, unheard and unseen by anyone.

“ ** _RIN!_** ” howled Haruka too, drenched in sweat from exertion and the astonished looks of weary passersby as he tore past them on the left side of the stadium. No matter where he turned, strangers flanked him on all sides, unfamiliar faces contorted in a mixture of approbation and fear. “ ** _Rin!_** _**Where are you?!**_ ”

He pressed on, sprinting till he reached the nearest street clock, where his pace staggered to a halt and Haru doubled over, hands trembling over his knees as he gasped for breath. It took him several gulps of air before he could lift his head to check the dial, beads of sweat rolling down his cheeks as the minute hand flicked from 11:49 to 11:50 am. The noise of the outside world shrank to a whistle in his ears. His heart hummed as though it were counting milliseconds.

_We’re running out of time! Rin…!_

Haruka’s eyes grew large as they fell to the ground. At that moment, lost in the grays of the concrete and the shrouded maze of his thoughts, he would have given anything in the world for the slightest insight into Rin’s mind, the faintest idea of his current course… but the young transfer student Haruka once knew, or felt he knew, and the dark, desolate creature Rin had become seemed worlds apart. Did anything even remain of the boy whose final term of elementary school had been completely engrossed by the idea of a glorious medley relay? The boy who once believed in the magic of time capsules buried underground, and fantasized about swimming in a pool of.. _cherry blossoms…?_

The next moment, an image flashed through his mind: a barren cherry tree and a shallow pool, separated by a chain link fence. Whether the memory was old or new, Haru could not tell, not even when the voices of his friends drifted across the scene.

_“Oh, that tree looks just like the one at Iwatobi Elementary!”_

_“You’re right, Nagisa-kun…”_

_They look almost identical._

Haru whipped up his head as inspiration struck him, his mind searching frantically for the shortest route between the avenue and the nearby practice pool. If even Nagisa and Rei could see the resemblance… _Maybe…!_

* * *

After that shameful scene in the corridor, Rin stumbled into another slow-paced nightmare, where his feet clung to the floor with every step, his jaws melded together over a mouthful of broken words. Nitori’s voice trailed on the edges of his consciousness, scraping softly at his senses, but Rin fixed his eyes in space, letting the other’s pleas flush through him like empty gusts of air. He would not, could not heed him. It would have been dangerous, no longer to himself, but to the innocent boy pursuing him, and what could Nitori hope to say to him anyway? The world had ended, and Rin was leaving. Life was as simple and cruel as that.

Except, upon exiting the stadium with his bags hanging from his shoulders, Rin found himself stranded without purpose or a sense of direction to guide him. While he was still inside the building, the urge to leave the place where his hopes and dreams lay shattered tugged him forward, but once sunlight spilled over him in hot coils, the reality of an unfamiliar scene and nowhere to go sank in with it. Having foolishly assumed his life couldn’t end this way, he had taken it for certain he would be riding the rental bus back to campus with everyone else…

He could have searched for the bus, asked permission from the driver to board it, and sat there until all events passed and the closing ceremony ended, but the thought of reuniting with Nitori under such pathetic circumstances repulsed him. Having caused so much trouble and pain, Rin would at least spare the poor misguided boy this final grief, and erase himself before the captain would in front of everyone. Of all people in the world, perhaps Nitori would find it in his heart to remember Rin better than… than _this._

As his thoughts swirled around his distant farewell, Rin’s feet carried him from the stadium to the open street, and he allowed himself to roam, hoping the needle of his inner compass was pointing in the direction of the nearest station. His eyes now wandered about in search of clues - a sign, a bus stop, anything that promised he might soon disappear from this wretched town, but instead they fell on the marbled shimmer of water, sealed from him by a chain link fence. The green paint peeled, and the cherry tree by the fence loomed dark and barren, yet the scene pierced through the fog of his mind, drawing Rin closer until he stopped in the middle of a secluded path and dropped his duffel bag, his gaze climbing the branches. Was it all a dream? Somehow, it was warmer than he remembered, and something was missing… _But what..?_

In the distance, he heard the rumble of footsteps and the screech of labored breathing intruding upon his reverie. It grew louder with every second, until a figure swam into the corner of his vision, stopping a few meters away. Rin stood still for a moment longer, the answer to his question still eluding him, then pulled himself away from that oddly familiar view to glance at the newcomer.

His blood curdled, then boiled at the sight of Haruka, his face contorting into a savage growl.

_Why…?! Why **you?!**_

“Haru..” he rasped, his throat tight. “Why are you here?”

Opposite him, Haruka’s jaws hung open, heaving wordlessly like his lungs were about to collapse, but it was just as well. Haru had never expressed an ounce of true feeling in all his life, and with nothing more to lose, Rin was feeling grand and charitable for a change.

“Come to laugh at my pathetic loss?” he offered. Haruka stared, his cheeks pale.

“Rin…” he breathed at last, baffled and unnervingly dense. Did he really need Rin to elaborate?

“You saw what happened in freestyle, and I was taken out of the relay,” Rin explained, struggling to rein in the desperate undercurrent that clung to his every word like slime. “The world is laughing at me, so join in!” he said next with a frail grin and false bravado, throwing a hand to the side. “No need to pity me.”

But Haru refused to laugh. He wouldn’t even do Rin the favor of looking annoyed. Instead he stared astonished, hurt even, until Rin’s hand dropped. Rin gritted his teeth in embarrassment.

“ _I told you to **laugh!**_ ” he snapped, his hands clenched into fists by his sides. He twitched as a jolt of rage shot through him, though his feet still anchored him in place, leaving him squirming as his nose filled with the metallic stench of adrenaline. “That’s all I’m good for, anyway! I’m not even good enough to race you guys in a relay!”

Of all things, it was the idea of the relay that seemed to startle Haru out of his trance at last.

“Calm down, Rin!” he cried, his voice ringing obscenely loud in the deserted path, goading Rin to drown it out with everything he had.

“ ** _Shut up!_** ” he howled at the top of his lungs, forcing Haru into a moment’s retreat. “ _What would you know?!_ ”

Silence blared as the question hung heavily in the air, but Rin could trace no fear, no hesitation in Haruka’s features. If anything, he fixed his eyes on Rin in calm defiance.

“I know!” he spoke at last, his own hands curling into fists. “How fun it is to swim with friends… How good it feels to swim in a relay together…” Haru lowered his eyes, as if in shame, but at the last moment, he forced himself to look at the other again, his brows painfully knit. “And the one who taught me that… it was _you_ , Rin!”

For a fleeting moment, Rin stared at him in shock, his insides twisting. Oh, how that younger self from a better time would have loved to hear those words! How fondly that poor thirteen-year-old could have clung to such a confession in his desolate hours, stranded in a foreign land so far from anything he had known, rejoicing in the conviction that he had touched Haruka’s soul like the other had touched his…

 _You are late, Haru…_ snarled a bitter voice inside him, _You’re twenty million years **too late!**_

Haruka took a step forward, then another. At his advance, Rin’s lips split over a row of barbed wire teeth.

“You’re the reason I...” Haru spoke again, straining to find the right words, but the next moment, Rin snapped and launched forward in a fit of rage, his shoulder bag slamming to the ground as he seized Haruka by the collar of his jacket, his fingers curled into the fabric like hungry claws.

“ _Shut up!_ ” he roared in Haruka’s face, whose hands instinctively clamped around Rin’s wrist. His touch suffocated. The world throbbed once, twice.

“I understand now!” cried Haru, drenched in sweat and his tone frantic. “ _I found the answer!_ Why it is I swim! _Who_ I’m swimming _for!_ ”

Rin’s eyes narrowed, his teeth gritted in resentment as Haruka’s words struck him in the face. Did Haru really come down here just to spew all this garbage and tell him he had been replaced? The void inside him shrieked at the thought. He wanted, _needed_ to lash out, to hurt, to destroy, but as his hands snagged on Haru’s collar, too stiff to release it, his mind glitched and the world faded to Samezuka’s campus. For a moment, even Haru’s terrified face disappeared, until Rin stood alone, staring in visceral horror at the boy on the pier, the boy who returned to take everything from him.

_If you hurt Haru again, I will never forgive you._

Rin’s eyes flew wide open, large and glassy as panic consumed him. _Killed.. I’m gonna be killed..._

“ _I told you to shut up!_ ” he cried out, no longer outraged but frightened out of his wits as his skin screamed in Haruka’s grasp. The fists that once itched to draw back and strike him in the face now slammed against Haru’s shoulders in a desperate attempt to shove him away, but just as Rin struggled to release Haruka’s collar, Haru found himself equally unable to let go of Rin’s arms. He stumbled backwards, dragging Rin down with him. His back slammed against the ground and Rin’s fists dug into him, hard enough to knock his air out and stun him silent.

Rin recovered first. He planted his knees and finally pried his fingers off Haruka’s collar, but when he attempted to pull away, Haru’s fists tightened on his wrists and pulled him backwards. Rin thrashed in his hold, kicking up dust as his knees scraped against the ground, but Haru gritted his teeth and yanked the other towards himself, then rolled sharply to the side to wrestle Rin to the ground. Rin struggled and they tumbled away on the path, their faces streaked with dust and sweat, until Rin found his balance and knocked Haru’s hands away, pinning him down by his shoulders. He lifted his head to glare at Haruka, jaws clenched and eyes raining lightning, till something sharp jutted into the corner of his vision: a red-brick border surrounding the barren cherry tree. His eyes trailed off, confused, then fell upon a forked twig lying in the dirt.

His heart stopped. Above the twig, his own handwriting stared back at him, scratched into the earth by someone else’s hand.

_For the Team_

Rin’s breath hitched as his mind flooded the grooves with white, scuffed and waxy as crayons… _Why…?_

Haru stared at him for a moment longer, expecting another surge of violence, but Rin seemed utterly petrified. Following the other’s gaze, Haruka risked a glance to the side, careening his head until he spotted the message he had scribbled into the dirt that very morning. His eyes flitted to the tree stretching timelessly into space.

“This tree looks like that cherry tree from the school yard,” he said, his eyes now seeking Rin’s. “Isn’t that why you were here?”

For a moment, Rin’s hold tightened over Haru’s shoulders, trembling as all strength left them. Making that brick-bed and scribbling that hopeful message seemed so long ago… _yet Haru remembered it… He remembered it..!_

Rin’s eyes widened, then shrank as tears welled up in the corners and a drop fell on Haru’s face, leaving a damp streak down his dust-powdered skin.

“ _Why? Why can’t I be free?_ ” bleated Rin, his voice drowning as the chasm inside him opened, erupting with the tears his past self stubbornly refused to shed. He gritted his teeth and arched his head, but his tears kept pouring down, and looming over Haru as he did, Rin felt small and pathetic, his hands now grasping the folds of the other’s jacket for support.

“I want to swim with you guys,” he mumbled, face scrunching up as his tears cut burning paths down his cheeks, dripping down his chin. “I want to swim in a relay with you guys...”

Haruka watched him wordlessly, stunned into silence with every droplet that met his cheek. The last time he had seen Rin cry, their young worlds cracked and shattered, but now, lying in the dirt, back sore and shoulders aching, time looped backwards until all Haruka saw was the sixth-grade transfer student, bawling his heart out at their graduation ceremony. Back then, Rin sobbed so loudly everyone around him burst into tears, everyone except Haruka…

His chest brimmed with warmth and Haru thought he might cry at last, but he couldn’t. Instead, he broke into a soft, relieved smile as Rin hung his head, his tears finally spent.

“But it’s too late now,” he breathed, his voice crumbling. Haru braced himself.

“No, it’s not too late,” he replied, propping himself up. Rin pulled backwards in surprise and confusion, mesmerized by the determined glow of Haruka’s face. “Let’s go, Rin!”

Rin stared back, unable to move as shock shackled him in place. Was there really a chance? Was there hope for him after all..?

Before he could protest or beg for reassurance, the sound of footsteps hit his ears once more: several pairs this time in thunderous unison.

“There they are!” cried Rei in the distance and Rin lifted his head, to see the others gathering on the sidewalk at the end of the path. Makoto stopped in front, having recalled the place Haru had visited in the morning and led the others there as their last resort, while Rei and Nagisa panted behind him, Rei’s hand clutching his chest in relief.

Makoto hesitated, but only for an instant. Just as Rin managed to grasp that the others had been looking for the two of them all this time, Makoto broke away from his friends and rushed forward, charging towards the two of them like a battering ram.

Rin could just barely twitch onto his feet and stumble away from Haru as Makoto closed the distance, half expecting the guy to tackle him, but with dexterity Rin did not suppose such a large frame capable of, Makoto stopped right between them, his back shielding his friend as he reached down and pulled Haru to his feet.

“Haru, your clothes..!” he mumbled, eyeing the sandy blotches on Haru’s white tracksuit and the dirty streaks tapering down his face. Makoto’s hand twitched upward instinctively to wipe them, but he caught himself in time and turned around instead to glare at Rin. Rei and Nagisa looked alarmed, but before they could call out to him and make the situation worse, Haru reached out a gentle hand to tug at Makoto’s sleeve.

“Makoto,” he said, his voice soft and even. Quiet as he was, the other turned back to him at once, his features twitching between alarm and concern. Haru flushed at such an obvious display of protectiveness, but forced his own features calm.

“It’s okay,” he smiled, faint though it was, if only because a dozen butterflies fluttered in his stomach in disarray. “We tripped and fell. I’m fine.”

Makoto stared at him hard, as if struggling to believe him, then sighed in relief. He shot Rin one more look, but the suspect was still stunned and failed to react, which was probably for the best. Had Rin turned defensive or showed signs of guilt, Makoto might have given him a piece of his mind, but in the absence of incriminating evidence, he turned back to Haru with lax shoulders and fished a tissue out of his pocket. Haruka took it and wiped his face as Makoto dusted him off with large, sweeping pats. Behind them, Rin gathered his fallen bags, much too confused to process the unfolding scene, and perplexed all the more when Haru at last turned to him again.

“Come, Rin, it’s okay,” he said, eyes sparkling as he held out his hand. “It’s my turn to show you a sight you’ve never seen before.”

Rin’s heart skipped a beat as blood rushed to his cheeks. The air around Haruka surged with energy, raw and bewitching - _and yet..._

“But— How can I?” blurted Rin, his eyes flitting to Makoto, whose face darkened despite his every effort to appear firm in his decision.

“This is everyone’s final chance,” he said out loud, and with diminishing patience, he added, “And if you don’t leave now, it will be lost forever! Aren’t you supposed to report to the pool soon?”

Rei gasped, then let out a shriek as he checked his watch.

“Makoto-san’s right! We’ve only got a few minutes or we will be disqualified!” he cried, staring at the others in panic. Makoto gritted his teeth.

“Then _hurry up and **GO!**_ ” he snapped at them, grabbing Rin’s wrist with the force of a metal vice as Haru left their side to unite with Nagisa and Rei. “Rin will catch up with you!”

“H-Hey, what gives?!” cried Rin as Makoto pulled, painfully aware that resistance was futile in the face of such raw power.

“Do you think they’ll let a Samezuka swimmer pass?!” groused Makoto, tugging him towards the others, who still lingered ahead as if they had failed to catch his meaning. “He’ll join you! _JUST **GO!**_ ”

“ _R-Right!_ ” yelped Rei, turning around to dash off with Haru and Nagisa in tow as Rin stumbled after Makoto, who gave him a few seconds to adjust to his rhythm, then broke into an all-out sprint.

* * *

No amount of training could have prepared Rin for this. In a matter of seconds, he found himself dragged past the others at twice their speed, his hand already limp and his arm threatening to detach from his shoulder. He shot them one last look of horror, then whipped his head forward, just barely keeping up as Makoto took to the left avenue, while the others headed towards the front entrance. In less than a minute, Makoto found an empty changing room and pulled Rin inside, slamming the door behind them. Only then did he release the other, who withdrew his hand with a pained hiss.

“You could have just told me to follow,” he panted as he clutched his sagging arm, rubbing vigorously to restore his circulation. Makoto flushed, but offered no apology. Instead he took a deep breath to steady himself, then dropped his bag on a nearby bench and tugged down his zipper, wiggling to loosen the jacket from his shoulders.

“Hurry up,” he said to Rin, his voice sufficiently even. “We’ll switch clothes so you can pass.”

Rin stared at him wide-eyed, but finally forced an affirmative and tugged off his own jacket, letting his street clothes pile up in a heap by his bags.

“Do we… switch swimwear?” he blurted, both of them coloring crimson at the thought.

“I’d rather not,” muttered Makoto with his eyes averted, the memory of ill-fitting swimsuits still far too fresh. “As long as you keep the tracksuit pants on, you’ll pass. Just tell the others to cover you until you can get in the pool.”

“Right, right,” replied Rin, reaching out his shirt as Makoto handed him his yellow Iwatobi-chan Secret Version shirt. Rin made a face at the design, but pulled it on at once, and in a matter of seconds, they were dressed anew, retaining only their legskins and shoes.

“Put on your swimming cap, too,” said Makoto, careful not to look at Rin as he adjusted his borrowed pants, hoping they didn’t look as tight as they felt. When Rin caught his meaning, he reached backwards instinctively, grasping at nothing. He sighed.

“You have it,” he muttered, pointing to Makoto’s borrowed pants. Makoto paused, then patted himself down until he felt a lump, soon pulling the balled-up article out of his back pocket.

“There’s a sink there, if you need to get your hair wet,” he said as he handed the cap over, nodding to his left. Rin hummed and walked passed him, turning on the tap to splash some water on his scalp. He snapped the cap on, then dug his goggles out of his duffel bag, hanging them from his neck and tucking them under his jacket. Makoto clenched his jaws as he sealed his own pair away, unable to help but think it was for the last time.

Once finished, the two turned to each other. Rin tensed.

“How do I look?” he found himself asking, suddenly conscious of how the tracksuit sagged on his frame, while the other looked a little too snug in his hand-me-downs. Makoto flinched, then lowered his eyes, struggling to keep his expression unaffected.

“You’ll fit right in,” he managed to say, unable to look at his own clothes anymore. Rin hesitated.

“I still don’t get it, though,” he began, shifting from one foot to the other. “Why are you doing this? I know you hate my guts, god knows I gave you every right.. and you’re still going to let me swim?”

“I’m not doing this for you,” replied Makoto, his features hardening again. “I’m doing it for my team. I’m doing it because I want Haru.. no, I need both of you to heal and move forward, and I can think of no other way to help you.”

Rin flushed. Makoto clenched his fists for support, and though he could feel them tremble, a surge of warmth rushed up his arms and into his shoulders, dripping courage into his heart.

“All this time, I thought that if I joined the swim club and trained as hard as I could, I would be able to replace you,” he said, his heart hammering wildly. “That if I did everything in my power to make the others happy, they might love me like they loved you. But I was wrong. Each and every one us is important and irreplaceable. The others taught me that.”

Rin stared at him in shock. Makoto’s mouth ran dry.

“I should have listened to Haru from the beginning,” he carried on, growing numb as the pain that clenched his heart sank into the depths. “This was never about me. I thought I could save Haru, I hoped I would be enough, but I’m not the one he needs right now. I know he would have swum this relay with me if he had to, and I wanted to swim with them so badly, but I knew it wouldn’t change a thing. In the end, I’m not enough to save anyone. All I can do is give you this chance, so everyone can move forward.”

Rin remained speechless, though his eyes gleamed, half afraid he might cry again. Makoto gritted his teeth, hoping his own eyes wouldn’t betray him.

“This started between the two of you, and both of you have been carrying this weight for years,” he said, straightening his shoulders to lend his words power. “If swimming this relay together might be the answer you’ve been searching for, then you have to take it, Rin! And if you really are Haru’s friend, and you care about the others as much as they care about you, you will take this final chance and give it your all… and no matter what the answer is, you will accept it and move forward. Only then will you be free.”

Rin swallowed hard, his heart pounding under the pressure, but he clenched his jaws and nodded firmly. Makoto nodded back, then seemed to catch himself and checked his watch.

“Now hurry up, or you won’t make it in time!” he snapped at Rin, jabbing a finger at the door. “And don’t take off your clothes until you’re up! Have the others cover you!”

“Right!” yelped Rin, then bolted to the door, shoving it open so hard it slammed against the outer wall. Makoto jumped forward to catch it before it might slam again. From the distance, Rin yelled back, “ _I owe you one!_ ”

Makoto didn’t reply. The moment Rin disappeared from sight, the courage that cloaked him while he spoke vanished as quickly as it had washed over him, his skin tingling in its wake. Fatigue threatened to claim its place, but Makoto steeled himself and grabbed Rin’s bags alongside his own, hauling them out of the changing room. His heart hammered as he pondered his options, slowly consumed by the thrill of the upcoming relay. He would have to wait until the second heat began to show himself on the balcony, else he might cause a disturbance, but he couldn’t bear to stay behind when every inch of him itched to move, to do anything other than idle uselessly in some forgotten corner of the stadium. Though it hardly mattered anymore, some part of him longed to be as close to the others as possible, and to pour his deepest feelings into the air, hoping his fervent wish would reach them all.

He hugged the bags to his sides and set out at a casual pace down the corridor, his gaze wandering aimlessly until it fell across something in his way. Makoto lifted his eyes. Opposite him, staring as surprised as Makoto felt was the lanky stranger he had collided with while looking for Rin. The other’s eyes scanned him from head to toe, then narrowed accusingly, and before Makoto could open his mouth, the stranger said, in a tone bordering on hostility,

“That’s not your stuff, is it.”

Makoto’s heart jolted. He took a step back, and when the other moved forward to meet him, Makoto pressed his arms to the bags and whirled around to flee.

“ _Oi!_ ” cried Yamazaki Sousuke, breaking into a run to give chase, but it was no use. In a matter of seconds, Makoto took a sharp turn and lost him completely.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm working very hard in between work and other struggles to finish this story. Please enjoy the new chapter, and if you like it, let me know! Your voices are keeping me and my story alive!


	65. EPISODE 12: Distant Free! - Part 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Back at the spectators’ balcony, Kou and the others now stood by the railing in a row, four pairs of hands wrenching the top bar in anguish as the minimalistic analog clock by the digital scoreboard ticked to 12:15.

 _“Men’s Medley Relay, Heat One_ ,” announced a voice through the speakers. Sasabe swallowed, his face caked in sweat.

“This is bad. It’s already starting,” he muttered, his brow creasing as he scanned the pool area one more time in search of the boys.

 _Did they come all this way just to be disqualified?_ Kou thought to herself, eyes large and her chest clenching. First her brother, now his friends, as if they had all slipped and fallen through the cracks, never to rise again. Kou hung her head, struggling against the acrid sting of tears, yet a faint glimmer of hope continued to tug insistently at her heart, urging her to look one more, just one more time...

She squinted down, the world a blur. Her breath hitched.

“ _They’re here!_ ” she cried to the others, beaming through her tears as a few figures in white and blue swam into view below, running single file towards a solitary organizer on the left-hand side of the pool. The man seemed to shake his head in dismay, but after a brief exchange – which, unbeknownst to everyone above, was to the effect that their fourth swimmer was on his way from the changing area –, he let the three of them pass, gesturing towards the upper left corner with his clipboard. Haru, Rei, and Nagisa thanked him, then scuttled off to their designated corner as their supporters staggered away from the railing, intoxicated by a surge of relief as profound as their anxiety had been.

“It looks like they made it in time!” breathed Ama-chan, who stopped mangling the paper salad that had once been her tournament program. Following her lead, the others plopped down one by one, sprawling across their seats with a sigh.

“What a relief..!” squeaked Kou, her grin so wide her cheeks ached, and if anyone had noticed the glaring absence of Makoto below, they kept tactfully quiet not to alarm her.

* * *

The moment Rin left the locker room and Makoto behind, he did not so much run as fly down the corridor in ecstasy, pursuing the distant rumble of the crowd to find the pool. Something delightfully cool bubbled inside his chest, flushing through and through him as he raced on in sweet ignorance of the world around him, losing himself in that once buried twelve-year-old yearning to join his friends at last.

Only as the exit drew near did Rin drop his pace to a light jog, zipping the borrowed Iwatobi Swim Club jacket all the way to his chin when he reached the door. Just to be safe, he tugged the collar as high as it could go to hide the rogue tufts of red hair peeking out from beneath his swimming cap, then pushed the door open and hurried forward to meet the organizer, who paused, turned around, then shifted back to the boy, whom he had managed to place as the missing fourth member of Team Five.

“Iwatobi High School?” he asked anyway, glancing down to his list where his pen hovered in wait to place the final checkmark. Rin blinked, then twitched and straightened, his hands tucked to his sides in salute.

“Y-Yes,” he mumbled, careening his head to the side to sneak a peek at his friends. The four members of the Samezuka Swim Club had already assembled, but stood apart from Haru and the others, for which Rin was glad; however, as soon as his friends spotted him, all of them now clad in swimwear, Nagisa gasped and flung his arms into the air, lips spreading wide to shout. Rin’s back burst into sweat even as his name was muffled by Rei’s hand with impeccable timing, slapped over Nagisa’s mouth just in time to prevent the fatal slip-up.

Rin heaved a sigh and shook his head, then hurried over to them, his eyelids lowered and lips pursed not to draw the attention of his fellow swimmers a few meters away. By the time he had closed the distance, Nagisa batted Rei’s hand away and puffed out his cheeks in a pout, while Haruka rolled his eyes, having finally thawed out from his initial shock of seeing Rin in their own white and blue tracksuit. At his inquisitive looks, Rin’s cheeks suffused with color, suddenly self-conscious at his awkward display.

“Sorry to keep you waiting,” he breathed, flashing a relieved smile at Rei, who moved to Rin’s right to shield him from the Samezuka team.

“Mako-chan gave you his tracksuit, huh,” whispered Nagisa, his eyes making appreciative rounds up and down Rin’s frame. “Did you switch swimsuits, too?”

“Of course not,” muttered Rin, coloring worse as his earlier embarrassment in the locker room returned with a vengeance. “Just our clothes. He said his tracksuit would let me blend in, so long as you guys covered me until it was my turn,” he finished, one hand scratching at the nape of his neck. Haru hummed.

“Of course,” said Rei in his place, internally thanking Makoto for his resourcefulness. “Leave it to us, Rin-senpai. Haruka-senpai,” he continued, turning to the captain, “would you step in front of Rin-senpai? I believe you’re tall enough to hide him sufficiently from the audience.”

“What about Rin-chan’s back, though?” asked Nagisa.

“If we leave last, the others won’t see,” shrugged Haruka.

“The Samezuka Swim Club is situated to our right on the balcony,” explained Rei, “so there’s no one directly above us who might be able to identify Rin-senpai from behind.”

“Can I take this thing off, then?” interrupted Rin, fumbling with the zipper by his chin. “I feel really weird in it. I don’t know why, but it makes me feel younger, somehow.”

“Oooh! Now that you mention it, you do look younger, Rin-chan!” gasped Nagisa. “You’re no longer scowling, so your face is all smoothed out like a baby’s bottom!”

“ _That’s not what I meant!_ And _what the hell,_ Nagisa!” Rin hushed him with a glare. He paused to pick up the thread the other’s weird comment had caused him to drop. “More like… it reminds me of the tracksuits we wore, back when we went to the ISC. Remember those? It was only a few months, but I probably still have it, somewhere.”

“Woah..!” breathed Nagisa in awe, poking a finger from patch to colorful patch across Rin’s yellow shirt and white and blue jacket. “I can see it too..! The lines and colors _are_ kinda similar!”

“I don’t believe any of us had that design in mind when we ordered our tracksuits,” joined in Rei with a push of his glasses, “but we might have been subconsciously influenced after all.”

“Well, are you ready for round two, Rin-chan?” winked Nagisa. Rin huffed, but he no longer cared to hide his smirk.

“More like are _you_ ready for a flawless exchange? You still remember our rhythm, right?” he teased back. Nagisa giggled.

“Of course I do! Leave everything to me!” he declared, his thin chest puffed out in obvious pride. “Just get back faster than anyone else!”

“You can count on that,” promised Rin with a grin that lit up his entire face, so childlike and radiant it stole Haruka’s breath away. Rin turned to him and their eyes met, Haru’s gleaming in the light. Rin’s heart gave a leap.

“Let’s do this one more time, Haru,” he said, his arms reached out to gather Nagisa and Rei on either side in a squeeze. “One more time, with the best team around!”

Despite himself, Haru broke into a smile and hummed. Having forced himself to dwell on the familiar patterns of their tracksuits as mementos of the now defunct Iwatobi Swimming Club, his guilt over their exchange of swimmers had lessened enough to allow for a moment of joy before the crowd burst into cheers above them, shattering that vacuum of tender nostalgia. The first heat was officially over, so the organizer approached them with hurried steps, his clipboard held out like an extension of his arm.

“Heat Two to the starting blocks,” he called out, receiving a resounding _Yes!_

Rei lifted a hand to clear his throat.

“Rin-senpai, please remove your tracksuit now,” he instructed, turning to Haru next. “Haruka-senpai, as captain, you should lead us to Block Five when he’s ready.”

Rin choked mid-change.

“ _You’re_ the captain?!” he squeaked as he threw his shirt and jacket onto the nearest bench, not daring to raise his voice any higher. Haru let out the slightest huff and arched his head.

“That’s right,” he replied, his tone unnervingly smug. “So hurry up, Rin. Captain’s orders.”

“I can’t believe this,” grumbled Rin, but he at last slipped out of the borrowed tracksuit pants and tossed them on the pile, and after another moment’s fiddling with his goggles, he was ready to follow Haru to the blocks. Nagisa and Rei flanked him on both sides as they advanced behind the Samezuka team in a snug cluster, stopping just short of their designated block.

Overhead, the speakers clicked.

 _“Men’s Medley Relay, Heat Two,”_ announced a voice, followed by five short whistles.

“Makoto!” “Makoto-senpai!” cried Sasabe and Kou from the balcony, their breath held as Haru made way for their backstroke swimmer, who stepped forward and dropped into the pool from the edge in a flash of black and… red?

“Huh..?” blinked Kou, leaning closer. _Am I looking at the wrong lane?_

Opposite her, Nitori Aiichiro wondered the same thing, his brow furrowed as he watched the Iwatobi swimmer curl into position beneath the block to the next blow of the whistle. _That pattern..._

_“Set…”_

_Don’t tell me—!_

“ ** _Go!_** ”

The whistle blew and Rin soared into the air in a flash of black and red unmistakable, breaking through the surface with a furious splash as Iwatobi and Samezuka jumped from their seats with a resounding _“ **WHAAAT?!** ”_

“Matsuoka-senpai?!” yelped Aiichiro. Beside him, Mikoshiba Seijuurou could have spat fire in frustration.

“What does he think he’s doing?!” he hissed as Rin rose to the surface, soon pulling ahead of Azuma Yuuki and the others in a furious all-out. Upstairs, both clubs sank into silence, completely mesmerized by his lightning pace.

“I know I’ve told them to be free, but they went too far,” muttered Sasabe at last, to be interrupted by the slam of the door behind them. They flinched and turned as ragged breathing hit their ears a moment later: Makoto, who had run several laps down the corridors to shake off his pursuer, and then to find his way back to the others on the balcony. He collapsed next to Sasabe, heaving with his hands on his knees and still clad in Rin’s clothes. The others gawked at him bewildered.

“What are you doing here?!” snapped Sasabe the moment he regained his senses. Makoto struggled to catch his breath.

“Never mind that,” he gasped, whipping his head up to look them in the eye. “Just cheer for them! _Kou-chan!_ ”

For a moment, Kou stared at him stunned, but as the message sank in, the prospect painted her cheeks a jubilant pink.

“ _Yes!_ ” she replied, standing up at once to lend her voice strength. Next to her, Chigusa nudged her friends and pulled up her corner of the banner, coaxing the others to hold it high for the boys below.

“Go, go, go, go, go, Rin!” cried Kou through the cone of her hands. Opposite her, the Samezuka bench gaped wordlessly, having quite forgotten their own swimmers in the commotion.

“He’s fast..!” uttered Mikoshiba, bewitched by Matsuoka’s rapid movements. At his words, the enchantment dispersed and Aiichiro recollected himself, raising his hands to his mouth.

“ _Matsuoka-senpaaai!_ ” he wailed as Rin carved a path across the water, his eyes fixed on the ceiling tinted dark by his goggles. With each swing of his arms, pale froth splashed into his view like storm clouds over a blackened horizon. Rin’s lungs shrieked for air as he struggled to escape it, but just as panic seized his heart, a flash of white coursed through the darkness, splitting the clouds above his head. Sunlight poured down into the depths of his mind, enveloping him in a warm, glorious glow.

 _Toraichi… No.. Dad!_ grinned Rin, his cheeks flushed and heart pounding. _Watch me, Dad!_

He tumbled with a thunderous kick and shot forward, his every nerve ignited in a single urge: to return to the block before anyone else so the others could enter the shining path he and his father had paved for them, one in search of glory, and the other out of love. Opposite him, Nagisa now crouched upon the block, counting in his head just as Rin had taught him years ago in the hopes of achieving zero reaction time.

Rin’s hand slammed against the wall, sending a jolt up Nagisa’s toes.

“Nagisa!” howled Rin as the other leaped into view. He then scrambled out of the pool with his head careened towards the water, not wanting to miss a single second of Nagisa’s breaststroke.

“A perfect start!” cried Rei as Rin stepped over to him, the two exchanging proud glances before turning back to watch Nagisa swim.

Riding the waves of Rin’s lead, Nagisa sailed forward with wide sweeps of his arms, drawing split-second breaths as his head bobbed up and down in a steady glide. The water ahead loomed solid as a wall, resisting his solitary advance, yet the loneliness that once siphoned his will in the face of something greater than himself had been sapped from Nagisa’s mind. In its place, the water filled with life, swelling with delicious sounds: the beat of wings, the swift glide of sharks, the whistle of dolphins, the booming cry of orcas. They danced on the edges of his vision, whirling, fluttering, beckoning and Nagisa’s eyes widened, itching to join them.

 _Wait for me!_ he called out to them in glee, his arms stretching with every stroke as if magnetized by his friends’ fervent shouts by the block. _I’m coming!_

Above him, Sasabe’s eyes darted to the scoreboard, where Iwatobi High School pulled into third place, clocked at 1:00:06.

“They’re ahead of top schools!” he cried, coaxing the others to check the times on display.

“Amazing!” cheered Ama-chan with a clap of her hands, while Kou beamed in silence, wondering if she had just witnessed a personal best, for she had never seen her brother swim so brilliantly before, or seen Nagisa in better shape as a miracle unfolded in front of their very eyes, mysteriously orchestrated by Makoto.

Speaking of Makoto, he had since taken his seat next to Sasabe to watch the relay, eyes fixed on the others by the block. During the last spurt, Nagisa’s hands reached the wall and Rei launched into the air before his friend could catch his breath, piercing the water with calculated precision.

“Rei-chan!” screamed Nagisa, his feet rooted in place until Rin forced him to climb out, pulling Nagisa up by his wrist to clear the way for Haru. The moment his feet touched the ground, Nagisa started bouncing on his heels, nudging Rin to see for himself how good Rei-chan had gotten over the years.

Up on the balcony, Sasabe and the others were ready this time, megaphone and banner in hand.

“Go, go, go, go, go, Rei!” _Go, go, go, go, go, Rei!_

“Swim, swim, swim, swim, swim, Rei!” _Swim, swim, swim, swim, swim, Rei!_

And swim Rei did, ascending to the surface with his shoulders raised and arms extended, then sinking below, undulating in an eternal clash between air and water, where one compelled him to spread his wings while the other pulled him irresistibly towards the depths. Rei’s jaw hung open in a silent scream for oxygen as water encased him on all sides, threatening to claim him, yet with every passing second, he could have sworn his dip had grown shallower and his rise higher, until the weight in his chest crumbled into nothing, leaving him lighter than a feather. In a moment of perfect clarity, only a single overarching thought remained: the conviction that he could do anything. For his friends, Rei could even fly.

 _It’s thanks to you, Nagisa-kun,_ smiled Rei, closing his eyes. _As long as you believe in me, I will never give up!_

He rushed forth on wings of froth beating in his wake, accelerating as Haru stepped onto the block. His foot slipped backwards. He adjusted his goggles. His fingers curled around the edge, and as Rei’s hands touched the block in perfect symmetry, the energy that had propelled him forward surged through Haruka too.

“ _Haru!_ ” he heard Rin scream as he dived into the blue, his body poised and hands pressed together as if in prayer. His fingers carved an opening and Haruka slipped through it, allowing his limbs to fall into that beloved routine as his mind submerged, surrendering himself to the water that cradled him dark and quiet. Haruka closed his eyes.

_This sensation… This is what I wanted. I don’t want to rely on or work with other people… I just want to drift through the water alone, in silence._

Back then, he truly believed that was all he wanted.

Back when he had nothing.

When he had no one.

But now...

 _Haru!_ Rin’s voice tore through the veil and Haruka opened his eyes, his breath bubbling away in pearls. Around him, the pool sizzled with energy, the hopes and dreams of his friends swirling in powerful currents.

 _Haru-chan!_ Nagisa...

 _Haruka-senpai!_ Rei...

Haru hesitated, his breath held… until he heard him, too.

 ** _Haru!_** cried Makoto, not from the water but from the bottom of Haruka’s heart, where his voice, once no more than a sleepy echo, had finally swelled into a resonate roar carrying his deepest wish. **_We’re waiting for you, Haru!_**

 _Makoto... Wait for me. I’m coming..!_ he called out, hoping his voice would reach the other as Haruka yielded to the current and surfaced again, imagining more than hearing the others bellow his name at the top of their lungs… everyone in fact except Makoto, who had been sitting in silence for the entire duration of the relay.

At first, as Rin swam, Makoto’s eyes scratched grooves into the surface, searching the waves for the slightest lack, a hollow the shape of himself, but the waves rolled in perfect sutures. Nor could he find the smallest hint of hesitation or disarray in Rin’s backstroke. With a speed that astonished everyone around him, Rin had aced the first hundred meters and passed the baton to Nagisa, to remain by the edge of the pool for the rest of the relay, which Makoto spent scrutinizing that periodically changing group of teammates by the block, with only a glance spared at Nagisa’s breaststroke and Rei’s butterfly. As they waited for the next person to return, the others seemed engaged in excited chatter, Rin gesturing towards whoever was swimming at the moment in praise or inquiry, perhaps both, while the others responded with grins on their faces, and Haruka, with a nod or hum that Makoto caught more by heart than by eye or ear.

As the relay progressed, his mind tried to map the unfolding scene onto his memories of their first relay at prefecturals, but the more desperate Makoto had grown to find them perfectly alike, the more he found himself grasping at differences. Back then, he assumed rather than knew his own happiness. In the thrill of competing for one more chance of advancing to regionals ( _For another chance of meeting Rin_ ), none of them had spoken to each other while their teammates were swimming. Tension rigged their shoulders and glued their eyes to the pool, able to do nothing except cheer and beg and scream for the others to return faster, _faster,_ but now the stakes had changed completely. No one cared about the national tournament anymore, if they had ever truly cared about it in the first place. For all Makoto knew, meeting Rin again might have truly been the height of the Iwatobi Swim Club’s ambition, if they could accept his proposal so easily along with their pending disqualification... but oh, what a difference it had made, to be swimming with Rin instead of swimming _for_ him. Not that Makoto could perceive any disparities in terms of performance. Nothing could induce him to deny his friends’ efforts back then, even compared to their stunning displays of the moment, but the atmosphere in which they now flourished felt worlds apart from the scene Makoto had once been part of.

Rin’s cheerful passion proved contagious and consumed the others completely. Though their voices could not reach the balcony, their relaxed postures spoke for them; their proud smiles and vivid gestures spoke for them, and once Haruka dived in, even their urgent howls and pumping fists appeared so much more heartfelt, so much more genuine it broke Makoto’s heart in comparison. During the final spurt, Haru sailed towards the others on the wings of his newfound freedom, his graceful figure in vivid relief against the white lace of foam around him, and Makoto would have given anything in the world not to have to see it from such a perfect angle as the balcony afforded. To be crowding by the starting block, jostling, flailing, and howling himself hoarse at the sight of a black swimming cap and the flash of his arms swinging forward one at a time would have been more precious to him than that stunning image of Haru, which would no doubt be burned into Makoto’s mind forever. From his seat up high, he could even see Haruka’s hand meeting the wall the way the others never would, yet Makoto’s chest tightened in envy so acute he couldn’t breathe.

Silence pressed against his ears as Haru reeled backwards. The board flashed.

_1 - Iwatobi High School_

The vacuum popped and the stadium filled with victorious static that swarmed in Makoto’s ears like a million crawling insects. Beneath the block, Haru whipped off his swimming cap and goggles with his left hand, still breathless as his right hand instinctively pulled away from his side and lifted out of the water.

“Haruka-senpai..!”

Haru’s hand twitched to a halt by his chest, eyes flitting up to see Rei and Nagisa hunched over him with wobbling features. Both were gasping for breath after holding it so long in the finish, Rei’s hand pressed to his jumping heart while Nagisa balled his hands into trembling fists by his chest.

“Haru-chan..! Haru-chan...” whimpered Nagisa on the verge of tears, his face scrunched up in a futile attempt to stem the tide. Rei shook his head with an affectionate smile.

“There, there, Nagisa-kun,” he said softly, though his own reddish eyes and quiet sniffling gave him away, then seemed to remember himself and turned back to Haru, his brow quirked. “Did you need help, Haruka-senpai?”

Haru stole one look at his hovering right hand and dropped it, his cheeks seared. What was he thinking..?

“It’s fine,” he managed to say as he planted both hands on the edge, hoisting himself out of the pool without anyone’s help, but he had no sooner found his balance and straightened than a shadow splattered over his chest, followed by a jolt as Rin crashed into him. Haru screwed his eyes shut as their bodies collided, fearing they might tumble into the pool, but Rin’s arms wrapped around him instantly, detaining him with tender force. When Haruka planted his feet at last, he risked a peek and found himself peering at Nagisa and Rei over Rin’s shoulder, the two gaping equally astonished at Rin’s emotional display. The enchantment only lasted a second, though. The next moment, Rei and Nagisa came bounding over too, piling themselves onto the pair with quaking shoulders for the group hug of the century.

“Haru-chan!” “Haruka-senpai!” they bawled in unison, too overwhelmed to hear Haru’s quiet protests, to be drowned out a moment later by Rin’s quivering voice.

“Haru,” he choked through his sobs, squeezing, “you showed me the best sight I could’ve asked for..!”

Haruka’s eyes widened, his heart beating too fast, too hard, until warmth spread over him in waves, the calm after a storm that had raged on for far too long. Had it really been years since their last hug? Haruka knew it must have been, yet the gap shrank shut until his own eyes closed too, half wishing the moment would never end.

“Yeah,” he sighed, his lips wrestling with a smile that refused to leave as Rin threw an arm around his shoulder, pulling him and the others into a circle.

“Rei! Nagisa!” he blurted, too star struck for words.

“Rin-senpai..!” mumbled Rei, his face scrunched up and his glasses fogged.

“Rinrin!” added Nagisa, unable to resist it anymore, but far from feeling any annoyance at the nickname he had once resented, Rin burst into laughter at the memory, loud and sweet and music to their ears. Up on the balcony, Kou watched them with tears in her eyes, much too stunned and happy to wipe them.

“Onii-chan…” she whispered, squirming in her seat with joy much too great for her small frame to contain. Beside her, Sasabe and Ama-chan exchanged lenient glances.

“Rin’s really fast,” noted Sasabe, his impression of Rin’s final spurt still vivid. Ama-chan shook her head with a smile, one hand resting on her heart.

“I was shocked at first, but this is touching,” she said to Kou, who continued to wriggle in her seat, anxious to move yet hardly knowing where or how.

Beyond the three of them, Makoto continued to sit in silence, his eyes large and glassy. His hand twitched in his lap as Haru lifted his own hand below the block, but the urge to reach out died across that vast distance between them. Separated from everyone, Makoto could only watch as Haru climbed out on his own and Rin proceeded to tackle him in a hug, and Makoto supposed, more than saw the smile lighting up Haru’s face when the shift of his arms told Makoto that Haru had returned Rin’s gesture of his own accord, embracing him for the first time in years. The others joined them a moment later, crowding Haruka, yet he held onto them with warm willingness that had never appeared so becoming to Makoto as it did at that moment, when they formed a merry circle that seemed perfectly complete without him.

Back when they had won the relay together, Haruka looked little more than exhausted and dazed as he stepped over to Makoto and let his head bonk against the other’s collarbone, arms hanging lifelessly by his sides the entire time, but now… now that Haru had been reunited with the person he wanted to see...

“He’s so happy…” mumbled Makoto, hardly realizing the words had slipped out, until Kou mistook his meaning in a fit of sisterly raptures and sprang from her seat to fling herself at Makoto, her cheeks hot and wet as she cried,

“He is, _he really is!_ Thank you so much, Makoto-senpai!”

Too stunned to correct her, and unable to expose himself as utterly selfish and unfeeling, Makoto let her cling as entropy consumed him. He even let Chigusa and her friends flock around him and attach themselves as well, embracing their friend and the winner of the swim club popularity poll in a moment of shameless self-indulgence, while Makoto wished every moment the ground would swallow him whole.

Their cluster strangled the air around him, blocking sight and sound, but even so, a faint cry at last penetrated the wall of their intertwined arms.

“Mako-chaaan..! Kou-chaaan..! Over here…!”

_Nagisa..?_

“Nagisa-kun?” blurted Kou, disentangling herself a moment later to peer over the railing. All the other teams had since left for the exit in loose groups to make way for the third heat of the medley relay, but Rin and his friends remained by the poolside, where Nagisa now flailed wildly to get Kou’s attention, while Rei simply gestured for her to come down and join their cheerful party.

“ _Kou-chaaan, Mako-chaaan!_ ” cried Nagisa again, pulling his hands to his eyes to crudely imitate a flashing camera. Kou gasped as the familiar shape of his hands rang a bell, reminding her of the small pink camera still tucked away in her bag.

She took a deep breath and lifted her own hands, forming a cone by her lips.

“ _We’re coming! Don’t move!_ ” she cried at the top of her lungs, then pushed herself away from the railing and seized her bag, digging around zealously for her camera.

By the time she found the poor thing buried on the bottom, her friends had calmed down just enough to feel a twinge of embarrassment and drew away from Makoto, which was just as well, for it was Kou’s turn to latch onto him again, this time by the wrist.

“Come on, Makoto-senpai!” she chirped as she tugged him up and out of his seat, paying no heed to Ama-chan and Sasabe’s objections. Now that the prospect of a happy brother awaited her below, no one could hope to compete for Kou’s attention anymore, not even her captive, who begged her uselessly to slow down as he stumbled after her. Once they disappeared from sight, however, Makoto found he was thankful for Kou’s blind zeal. While she had eyes only for the quickest path to the pool, Makoto could at least struggle with his features in relatively privacy, repeatedly forcing a smile that could pass for something like gladness. Haru might be able to tell it was fake – somehow, his friend had gotten very good at reading him, but if he could at least fool the others, Makoto would survive.

* * *

A minute later, they barged through the exit directly below their seats on the balcony, by which time their friends had abandoned the block at the request of the tournament staff, conveniently relocating themselves on the right side of the pool in anticipation of Kou and Makoto’s arrival.

As soon as Kou had spotted them, she released Makoto’s wrist so she could fire up her camera, lifting it to her eyes with a press of the button. Realizing her intent, the others struck victorious poses for her except for Haruka, who simply let himself be dragged into the shot by Rin, then endured the flashing lights with his arms hanging and his head turned, though he occasionally peered at Makoto from the corner of his eye. Kou snapped a dozen shots, then checked the preview window. Only the first few came out blurry.

“Perfect!” she giggled. “Another memory for the Wall of Fame!”

Behind her, Makoto’s eyes fell to the ground, one hand wrapped around his wrist. The others exchanged puzzled glances at his awkward stance, but as each pondered what to say to Makoto, Rin braced himself and withdrew his arm from around Haru’s shoulder, breaking away from the group to approach his benefactor. Kou blinked at him confused, then seemed to catch his meaning and scooted aside, allowing her brother to step in front of Makoto. Their eyes locked in silence. A moment later, Rin offered his hand.

“Thank you,” he said with a tentative smile, braving the other’s surprise and hesitation through mounting discomfort, but just as his hand wavered in dejection, Makoto seized and shook it, forcing the smile he had practiced all the way to the pool area. His hand burned dry in Rin’s wet grasp, whose smile widened into a grin as a gust of relief blew over him and the others, followed by a flurry of contented sighs. Kou snapped a few pictures of them to be safe. A few feet away, Nagisa huffed.

“Well, don’t just stand there, Rin-chan, Mako-chan,” he chided, though he caved at last and cracked a grin, “come over here and let’s take some more pictures together!”

“You can stand by me, Makoto,” mumbled Haruka, his cheeks tinged as Makoto shuffled over to his right, while Rin reclaimed his place in the middle by Haru’s left, throwing an arm around his shoulder again when Makoto showed no signs of wishing to do so. The others resumed their posing, or in Haru’s case, their idling about, and though Makoto’s posture loomed rigid and his gaze trailed vacantly into space, his smile at least gave Kou no cause for complaints. If anyone, it was Haruka who earned a scolding for never looking at the camera, but it could not be helped. While they stood together, with each and every shot, his eyes were hopelessly searching Makoto’s.

* * *

As Kou committed their touching reunion to digital memory, someone else standing further off hardly dared to blink as he burned it into his mind: Yamazaki Sousuke, who had come to the tournament solely to watch Rin swim, but instead witnessed despair, followed by a revival beyond his wildest imagination.

The two of them had always been rivals, ever since they had first met. Whether it was swimming, basketball, video games, or who would get to have the one Soda Guy popsicle at the convenience store, competing against each other and throwing down in their own flashy rendition of rock, paper, scissors came as naturally to them as breathing. Something about Rin made it so. Whenever they met, no matter what Rin had set his mind to, the promise of another challenge crackled around him. After a while, Sousuke’s nostrils flared with the raw stench of adrenaline at the slightest hint, the smallest provocation… and Sousuke wished it would never end.

Back then, the answer seemed simple: to never be on the same team, not even when Rin’s obsession with medley relays put the first wedge between them. Back then, Sousuke refused to yield, convinced teamwork would never compare to individual competition. In hindsight, it had been a fatal mistake, his first step towards the edge of a chasm where only rock bottom could break his fall. Had he known, could he have travelled back in time to that forlorn younger self who had said nothing and just watched Rin go, Sousuke would have begged him to quit Sano and transfer to Iwatobi Elementary before it was too late.

Miracles, however, had never been part of Sousuke’s life. No one had warned him, how could they, so he advanced to middle school alone, where the absence of his rival forced him to challenge himself, training hard to match the ambition of the friend who struggled in Australia on his own. Though Rin’s letters stopped coming after a while – one of them, written not to him but to Nanase, then revised at the last minute and sent to Sousuke instead, had been one of the last –, Sousuke had never lost faith in him, believing with all his heart that Rin would break through any wall he faced.

As the years passed and Sousuke enrolled in Tokitsu High School, his training intensified in dogged pursuit of the dream they once shared, the dream of standing on the international stage together. Armed with a brutal regimen and the determination to see it through, Sousuke pushed himself to his limits day after day, as if another lap or one more set of push-ups might speed up time and bring Rin to him at last. After a while, there was no one left who could beat him, no one… until fate chose to punish him for his hubris.

It began, innocently enough, with a slight snag of his shoulder after an intense weight lifting session, but Sousuke ignored it and pushed forward. What choice did he even have, when he still had a long way to go to become stronger and faster than anybody else? But the symptoms lurked and multiplied under his negligence. In the summer of his first year at Tokitsu, just before the regional tournament, Sousuke had lost a battle he should have never fought in the first place, and lost another before it had even begun.

Strangely enough, it was in his darkest hour that a letter from Kou brought news of Rin at last. He had been a deplorable correspondent, but she never forgot him, and wrote to inform him that Rin had come home at last. What terrible timing. Though the desire to see Rin after so long nearly killed him, Sousuke couldn’t bear to be seen at his worst. Their shared dream had ruptured, but he covered the cracks with silence, burying himself in a new cycle of physical therapy, breakdown, and physical therapy on constant repeat.

In the process, he had to miss a few tournaments, watching uselessly from the sidelines as his teammates started surpassing him. Impatience gnawed his bones, more painful than the decay of his shoulder as they beat their own personal best again and again while Sousuke’s records stagnated, until his own dream slipped from his fingers and shattered in the depths.

His denial could not last much longer. In his heart of hearts, he had already resigned, but before he abandoned that broken dream completely, he wanted to reassure himself by watching another dream take flight. Rin’s dream.

He traveled to the regional tournament in secret, where he stashed himself away on the uppermost floor of the stadium to watch Rin advance to nationals… but he did not. Where Sousuke had yearned to see progress, he instead saw Rin writhing in pain beneath the block in last place, a mere husk of his former self.

How could this happen? How could someone like Rin end up this way? Injury? Illness? His apprehensions nearly drove Sousuke insane. He rushed to the nearest exit, even braving the infernal maze of the stadium corridors to find Rin, but when he did…

“Forget it! _I quit! **I’m done swimming!**_ ”

Just one turn away, Sousuke stood frozen as those words sank in, sealing his throat shut. Rin drifted past him a moment later, so close Sousuke might have touched him if he could have reached out his hand, but all he could do was stare… and hidden by the wall, he soon overheard another conversation, one between Nanase and his friends. He knew, because when all talk had ceased, he glimpsed them as they ran past his corridor in search of Rin, but there was a fourth person Sousuke failed to recollect, even after they collided some minutes later in another hallway when Sousuke joined the fruitless search independently, hoping he might get to Rin before the others could.

He failed. And then, god knows how, Rin had slipped by him again, this time wearing an Iwatobi Swim Club tracksuit that had Sousuke doubting his own senses, at least until he entered the hallway and found himself face to face with the same stranger from earlier, the fourth Iwatobi swimmer wearing clothes and carrying bags that weren’t his.

Between Rin heading towards the pool area and a potential thief on the prowl, Sousuke gave chase to the stranger, but soon regretted his choice immensely. Rin had never managed to outrun him without a considerable head start, but the guy who looked like an overgrown child in Rin’s ill-fitting clothes sprinted beyond his reach within seconds. Sousuke charged after him regardless, following the sound of the other’s footsteps for as long as he could, but after an entire lap around the stadium, he was forced to realize he had been outmatched, not to mention terribly lost in the hallways. He ended up turning round the first corner in his way, bumbling aimlessly towards the light on the other end… to find himself in the pool area, where the Iwatobi Swim Club stood by one of the blocks with a cuckoo in their midst. Rin.

Stranded on the edges, Sousuke stood with his breath held… and finally witnessed a miracle. At the blow of the whistle, Rin came to life as Sousuke had never seen him before, swimming backstroke of all things like he had become a completely different person. Sousuke didn’t even know Rin could swim such a mean backstroke, yet there he was, pushing himself to the limits and blowing everyone away, and when it ended… he looked so happy.

The Rin who once had nothing but hardships to report, the Rin who had grown to know isolation and despair was laughing with his friends again, as if years of pain and misery had been wiped from the pages of his life... and as Sousuke watched, hope stirred in his empty heart. From the ashes of his former dream, a new one arose, fragile though it was: to swim with Rin again, one last time. Perhaps if Sousuke joined Samezuka Academy for his final year, and did whatever it took to enter the relay, he and Rin could be friends again. _No._ They could be true friends, the way they had never been before.

Sousuke stole one more glance at the group to strengthen his resolve, then turned around, leaving as he had come: alone and unseen by anyone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy the new chapter, everyone! We are so close now! The next one is coming next week!
> 
> For the first time in a long time, I tried writing parts of this chapter while listening to music. Normally I work in complete silence, but there are so many emotionally charged moments in this part, and so many excellent accompanying tracks, that I put them on repeat while I wrote and edited to see if my writing matched the mood. Tracks included "Brilliant Swim" (for the relay), "Confusion of My Mind" (for Makoto and Sousuke's parts, respectively), and "Great Nostalgia" for the true reunion between Rin and his friends.
> 
> Also, chapters have been revised up to Chapter 50, or _FrFr! Rin and Nitori's Day Out!_ Stay tuned from further revisions!


	66. EPISODE 12: Distant Free! - Part 5 (Hope)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The true reunion of Rin and his friends, idyllic though it was, could not last long. Just as Kou had stepped over to Makoto after another series of photographs, to ask if he might take a picture of her and her brother next, Sugimoto Hiroshi stormed into the pool area, having left the spectators’ balcony as soon as the captain of the swim team confirmed Matsuoka Rin’s desertion of Samezuka Academy for Iwatobi High School. He stalked over to the organizers’ desk and exchanged a few words with a one of them, pointing towards the offending group by the blocks. Rin and Makoto swallowed. Within seconds, everyone else behind the desk turned their heads to stare at the troublemakers in astonishment, while one staff member picked up her phone, gesturing vaguely towards the scoreboard.

In a matter of seconds, the digital display changed.

_Iwatobi High School - DISQUALIFIED_

“ _Attention, attention,_ ” came a voice from the speakers, even and calm in spite of the impending storm. “ _Iwatobi High School has been disqualified. Will the advisor of the Iwatobi Swim Club please proceed to the pool area. We repeat, will the advisor of the Iwatobi Swim Club please proceed to the pool area. Thank you._ ”

“Ouch..” mumbled Nagisa. Some meters away, Sugimoto turned around to face them, his features still twitching.

“Matsuoka Rin,” he called out, his voice raised just enough to reach the culprits.

Rin swallowed, but stepped forward, and a moment later, another pair of footsteps followed him to the surprised murmurs of their teammates.

“You have some explaining to do,” Sugimoto addressed Rin with narrowed eyes, but before the renegade could so much as open his mouth, Sugimoto’s gaze shifted to the newcomer, in whom he recognized the student he had once been forced to accommodate during the Samezuka Swim Club’s training camp. What was his name… _Oh, what was his name?_

“You…” he muttered, failing to recall it in full. Makoto pulled his arms to his sides and bowed to him deeply, prompting Rin to bow also.

“I apologize,” said Makoto, his tone appropriately subdued. “Matsuoka-kun might have been the one who joined the Iwatobi relay team and swam backstroke in my place, but I was the instigator. Please forgive the Iwatobi Swim Club. Having Matsuoka-kun take my place was my idea, and I’ll take responsibility for it.”

“Makoto..!” blurted Rin, bolting upright despite himself to stare at the other in disbelief. _Just how selfless and godly are you?! You’re making me look so bad..!_

“..Tachibana-kun,” spoke Sugimoto, having finally jogged his memory, and with a new, convenient target to suffer his ire. “I am shocked to hear you were responsible for this violation. Your manager and advisor vouched for you as a dependable, respectable young man, but I see this is not the case. Your club ‒ _no_ , your school and everyone connected to you must be deeply disappointed in you.”

Makoto winced, but remained as he was and made no protest. Rin gritted his teeth.

“ _Sensei,_ ” he threw his hands in the air in exasperation, to be interrupted this time by another flurry of footsteps as Amakata Miho made her way towards the organizers’ desk. Rin gave Makoto a hard nudge, forcing him to straighten at last and face her in growing trepidation, but Ama-chan stepped in front of him at once, as if shielding him from criticism.

“Ah, Sugimoto-sensei!” she gasped, recognizing the Samezuka advisor, who now fidgeted opposite her with tinted cheeks as another instance of _deja vu_ rendered him speechless. She flashed him a contrived smile. “I’m afraid we meet again under troublesome circumstances…”

At a loss for words, Sugimoto forced a hum. Her smile turned steely enough to cut.

“Now, you must excuse my student,” she continued, her fingers steepled by her chest. “I believe we adults should handle this, and exercise prudence and forgiveness. Remember the wise words of Chilon of Sparta: _When strong, be merciful, if you would have the respect, not the fear of your neighbors._ Don’t you agree?”

Sugimoto Hiroshi now experienced slight pangs of regret, having requested the summons of the Iwatobi advisor himself, only to become completely mystified by her oddly familiar features and the startling finality of her words. Could he truly afford to argue with Chilon of Sparta right now, when only Iwatobi High School faced disqualification over the addition of his student, with the blame placed entirely on one of their own? His ears began to burn something fierce.

“Y-Yes,” he muttered at last, conscious of how the organizers’ patience had run incredibly thin with all their interruptions and difficulties. “Matsuoka-kun, you are dismissed. I leave it to Mikoshiba-kun to decide your fate as captain.”

Rin bowed to his advisor, accepting his conditions without a word. In turn, Ama-chan glanced over her shoulder to Makoto, who still stood behind her with his head lowered.

“You are excused too, Tachibana-kun,” she said cheerfully, content her knowledge of quotes had given her an advantage for once. “Please join the others until everything is sorted out.”

“Understood. Thank you, Ama..kata-sensei,” replied Makoto with a bow, biting his lip before he might have called her Ama-chan-sensei in front of everyone. She rewarded him with a tilt of her head, though her smile peeled as she watched him and Matsuoka Rin join the others, bracing herself for a terribly unpleasant conversation with the organizers.

* * *

While Amakata Miho and Sugimoto Hiroshi endured the complaints of the tournament staff, their troublesome charges gathered Makoto’s clothes from the bench in the back, then left the pool area to find a changing area for Rin and Makoto. As soon as they happened upon an empty locker room, the two finally got their clothes back to Makoto’s relief and Rin’s chagrin, whose shirt visibly sagged after the other’s frame had stretched it to its limits. Rin chose not to comment, however. Instead he pulled the cords of his trousers a bit tighter, then extended his hand once more to Makoto, who took it with a good grace this time, and shook it with greater resolve than before.

“Well, I suppose we should head outside, to wait for Amakata-sensei,” risked Rei, somewhat hesitant to break up their party. Rin sighed, but he did so with a hapless grin.

“I guess I’ll go find the captain, then,” he said, his eyes flitting from Makoto to his friends. “See you guys later.”

“Oh, _oh!_ Rin-chan!” Nagisa shot an arm into the air to steal his attention. “When you’re done, do you wanna come back to Iwatobi with us? We were preparing super hard for regionals, so we never had time to do anything my birthday, so I wanna do something fun tonight, and we could catch up on each other while we’re at it!”

Makoto and Rin stared at him equally surprised. Rin composed himself faster.

“I might,” he replied, one hand slipping to the nape of his neck, “but I need to go back to campus first, and it’s like another hour to get from there to Iwatobi..”

“ _Awww, Riiin-chaaaaaan..!_ ” moaned Nagisa as he attached himself to Rin’s arm and nudged his head shameless against the other’s bicep, finally coaxing silent laughter from Makoto, who had come to embrace Nagisa’s childish mannerisms as endearing displays of familiarity only Nagisa could be capable of. Rin gave him a loud _Tch_ , his cheeks hot from being put on the spot.

“Alright, _alright,_ already!” he groused, wiggling his arm in Nagisa’s greedy grasp as his other hand pressed against the other’s scalp to force him into retreating. “I’ll see what I can do, so get off me..!”

“That’s our Rin-chan!” chirped Nagisa, letting himself be pushed away as he released Rin’s arm. Rin scoffed at his innocuous grin.

“Well, time to get kicked off the team and see if they’ll let me ride home at all,” he said with a wry smirk, his index and middle fingers pressed to his temple in a casual salute. “See you,” he flicked his fingers away.

“A-Ah. See you soon, Rin-senpai,” mumbled Rei, lifting his hand to wave.

“If they don’t let you, you can ride with us! Just let us know!” waved Nagisa until Rin disappeared beyond the corner.

“You know,” he carried on, one finger poking his chin, “if they _did_ kick Rin-chan off the swim team, he could come join us instead! Wouldn’t that be funny?”

Haru gave him a look but said nothing, leaving all arguments to Rei, while Makoto remained silent, permitting himself only a brief reminder that Ama-chan was probably waiting for them.

They found her and the others in front of the stadium, where the boys lined up to receive some merciful admonishment for their sentimental antics.

“It wasn’t easy to endure the staff members scolding us,” complained Ama-chan, her arms folded in front of her chest to resist wagging her finger at them. “They’ve never had someone swim for a different school’s relay team before.”

Everyone stared back at her fittingly mortified, even Haruka, who bowed his head with everyone else and lent his voice to a quiet and sincere _We’re very sorry._ Ama-chan sighed.

“Well, it’s okay,” she said at last with a wink, for she had forgiven them the very moment their touching performance restored Matsuoka-san to her cheerful self again. “Young people do wild things sometimes.”

“Why did you pull that stunt, though?” Sasabe asked at last, as they had no time during the relay to quiz Makoto. The instigator swallowed as all eyes fixed on him, his friends hesitant to speak, but Makoto took a deep breath to steady himself, managing a lukewarm smile in the process.

“Because…” his eyes fell on the ground, “…it was for the best.”

Nagisa hummed, turning back to their advisor and coach with a bright smile. “We may be on different teams…”

“…but in the end…” added Rei, glancing to Haruka next.

“…we’re still friends,” finished Haru, making no effort to hide his own smile.

“What does that mean?” blurted Ama-chan, but all she received in reply was embarrassed laughter, and a slight turn of the head from Makoto.

* * *

Meanwhile, at the parking lot of the stadium, Rin reunited with his team, who were now gathering by the sidewalk to wait for the Samezuka rental bus. Having watched Makoto assume responsibility for his affairs in a manner nothing short of heroic, Rin could no longer bear to be outdone, so as soon as he spotted the captain, he hurried forward to meet Mikoshiba Seijuurou, who had since been informed of Sugimoto’s wishes, and awaited Matsuoka’s next move with menacing looks. Concerned for his senpai, Aiichiro lingered behind Seijuurou’s back instead of joining the others, ready to speak at the slightest opportunity to defend his idol, whose glorious backstroke, far from offending Aiichiro’s sense of duty, had instilled in him the desire to one day participate in such a wonderful relay himself.

Rin stopped at a distance to incline himself the way Makoto had to Sugimoto, his voice firm as he told Mikoshiba,

“I’m very sorry! I will take responsibility for my actions. Please kick me off the swim team.”

“Matsuoka-senpai…” mumbled Aiichiro, his brow creased. A moment later, Rin straightened, and as he saw no change in the captain’s features or any inclination to speak just yet, his eyes flitted to Nitori behind him.

“Nitori,” he called out to him, his voice softened, “Sorry for yelling at you earlier.”

“You don’t have to worry about that!” cried Aiichiro, his tufts swirling about as he shook his head. “Besides, we mustn’t kick you off—”

“ _I won’t accept this!_ ” snapped Mikoshiba, forcing a yelp out of Aiichiro. “I have a better way for you to own up to your actions,” he continued with a meaningful glare.

Rin lowered his head, briefly wondering if he might have to get used to Iwatobi High School’s boring white shirts and dumb dotted ties. Seijuurou didn’t even blink as he drew his next breath.

“Swim the way you just did for our team,” he announced his verdict, upon which he finally surrendered to the grin he had been struggling to contain for several minutes now. Far from wishing the troublemaker gone for good, he had completely reconciled himself to the fact that Matsuoka Rin would stay a member of the swim club, perhaps more than just a member till his graduation, for Mikoshiba Seijuurou was not insensible or blind. Even if he had no sisterly feelings to consider in the case, he could hardly ignore the fact that from the moment of Matsuoka’s reveal in the medley, his fellow swimmers could talk of little else than his lighting fast backstroke and fearsome potential.

“Captain…” mumbled Rin, moved beyond words by the magnanimous gesture, but his silent gratitude was not lost on Seijuurou, who turned away from him content for a change.

“Okay, boys. Let’s head home,” he called out to the others, to be met with a unanimous _Yes!_ “Hey, Nakagawa. Take the lead. I’ll be at the back.”

“Yes!” Nakagawa hurried to the front while Nitori stared after them, still baffled by this happy turn of events, and only startled out of his stupor by the sound of his senpai’s voice.

“Nitori,” said Rin, waiting for the other to turn. “Er…”

 _Come on, it’s not that hard,_ he scolded himself, lifting a hand to rub at his neck.

“...Ai.”

Aiichiro gasped. Rin averted his eyes.

“Practice with me again starting tomorrow,” he said at last, risking a glance at the other, whose flushed face had never beamed so brilliantly before. To be addressed like Nanase-san and the others, _as a friend!_ Aiichiro hardly knew how he would bear such happiness, and to show his senpai how much it meant to him, he replied in kind and cried,

“Yes, _Rin-senpai!_ ”

* * *

Soon enough, both swim clubs boarded their respective vehicles, while Ama-chan drove off with the girls and their banner, at which point Rin braced himself and composed a text message to the only person on the Iwatobi bus whose number he knew for sure.

_To: Tachibana Makoto_

_I only know your number, so tell everyone I’ll meet you guys around 7. Thanks. -Rin_

Makoto, who had been expecting a call from his family, made a face as Rin’s name appeared on the screen, but recovered quickly enough and showed the message to Nagisa, then passed his phone around so everyone could add Rin’s number. Nagisa clapped his hands with a grin.

“Then it’s settled, Rin-chan’s coming after all! Aaah, this is gonna be fun!”

“This will be our first friendly meeting in several years,” nodded Rei. “I’m looking forward to it!”

Haruka hummed, cracking a small smile as Nagisa flopped down onto a nearby seat with a happy sigh, then motioned for everyone to gather around him, presumably to talk about Rin and their relay. Makoto bit his lip.

“Um, I think I’ll take a seat over there,” he said to the others with what he hoped was an innocent smile, pointing to a row further away. “I feel really tired, so I thought I’d get some rest on the bus, since it’s such a long ride home.”

Haruka glanced to him in alarm, but Rei and Nagisa, who no longer saw any reason to doubt Makoto’s sincerity, acknowledged the request with lenient smiles.

“Of course, Makoto-san,” replied the vice-captain with a push of his glasses. “Today was rather turbulent, so I am not at all surprised you should be tired. Do take your time and rest on the way!”

“We’ll try and talk quietly so you can take a nap, Mako-chan!” added Nagisa, his voice painstakingly lowered to match his promise, as the idea that a few hours’ rest would be just the thing to restore Makoto before the evening party made Nagisa perfectly happy to oblige just about anyone. Makoto chuckled.

“Thank you,” he tilted his head with another smile, and after stashing everyone’s luggage away in the overhead compartments, he retired to his chosen seat and sank down, fishing out a pair of headphones. Haru pursed his lips, tempted to join him, but Rei had since settled down opposite Nagisa, both staring expectantly at their friend. Haru relented.

“I’ll sit with you, then,” he muttered with one more glance at Makoto, then scooted into the empty seat next to Rei. Behind them, Makoto allowed himself a relieved sigh.

For a while, he listened to music to drown out their avid discussions, afraid he might be stuck feigning sleep for hours on end, but he need not have worried so much. Though Makoto did not compete this time, running about and wrestling with his feelings for the better part of the day ultimately took its toll on him. He drifted off shortly after they had entered the highway and slept soundly for the rest of the trip, unaware that at some point, Haruka checked on him and snuck the headphones out of his ears, tucking them away in Makoto’s bag.

* * *

It was only when their bus ground to a halt at Iwatobi Station that Makoto stirred in his seat, nudged awake by a gentle hand on his shoulder.

“Makoto.. Makoto,” came Haruka’s voice, who waited patiently for Makoto to rub his eyes and turn his head. “We’re here.”

“Coming.. Thank you, Haru,” yawned Makoto, clambering out of his seat a moment later so he could help the others unload their bags.

He was the last one to get off the bus, lifting his wrist to check his watch. Rei did the same.

“We made good time,” he announced with a smile. “I assume Rin-senpai has since arrived at Samezuka Academy, and boarded the train to Iwatobi Station,” he added to Nagisa’s delight. His words reminded Makoto of the text he had received earlier. He reached into his pocket and checked his phone.

_1 New Message, 18:11_

_From: Matsuoka Rin_

_Tell everyone I’m on my way to Iwatobi. Thanks. -Rin_

“He’s on his way,” Makoto told the others, his features placid. “If he sent this when he boarded, he should be here around seven like he promised.”

“Yahoo!” cried Nagisa with his hands in the air.

“We must wait another hour, though,” sighed Rei. Nagisa clicked his tongue.

“An hour is nothing, Rei-chan! Time will fly if we all go sit in a nice patisserie and have some cake while we wait for Rin-chan! It’s for my birthday, so I’ll treat everyone! Well, what do you say?” he replied, stepping over to each of them in turn to squeeze their arms as a sign of including them in the gesture. After Rei and Haruka, he stopped in front of Makoto too, but Makoto grabbed his hands before Nagisa could latch on, pressing gently as he pushed them backwards.

“I’m sorry, Nagisa, but I actually have to go home now,” he said with a guilty smile. Haruka flinched. Nagisa stared wide-eyed.

“H-Hooome? But, _Mako-chan,_ I haven’t had a proper birthday party yet!”

“I know, and I’m really sorry, Nagisa,” explained Makoto with inexhaustible patience, “but you see, my family is waiting for me to come home as soon as possible. My parents agreed to put off going on vacation until the regional tournament ended because they knew it was important to everyone, but Ran and Ren have been very impatient to go camping, and since everyone has been waiting for me, I promised I’d hurry back so we could all pack and leave early.”

By the time he had finished, Haru’s anxiety simmered into remorse at the memory of the twins getting excited about camping, and the realization that they had been delayed some two weeks because of the swim club. As for Rei and Nagisa, the two exchanged surprised glances, having quite forgotten to consider Makoto’s obligations to his family when they themselves had no particular plans for the summer beyond rest and holiday homework. Being met with such a sensible explanation, however, and unwilling to impose on their friend any more than they had today, Nagisa caved and Rei flashed Makoto a brave smile.

“Of course, we perfectly understand, Makoto-san,” he nodded, his hands clasped behind his back. “Please give our regards to your family, and I wish you an enjoyable holiday.”

“Bye bye, Mako-chan,” pouted Nagisa, but then seemed to catch himself at Makoto’s discomforted looks and took a deep breath, his eyes sparking with bravado. “But! In return, you must have cake with me the next time we meet, Mako-chan! Promise?”

Makoto blinked, then laughed, his eyes falling to the ground with a troubled smile.

“It’s a promise,” he replied, extending a hand that Nagisa shook with a grin.

“Yaaay! More cake for me! I’m looking forward to it, Mako-chan!”

Makoto hummed, turning his head to Haru as the other stepped forward to grab his attention.

“When do you leave?” he asked, eyes searching his. Makoto stilled himself.

“Tomorrow morning,” he said quietly. It was Haru’s turn to hum.

“See you later, then.”

“See you later, Haru. Have fun, everyone..!”

And with that, Makoto turned around with a wave, leaving their circle in a light jog in the direction of the bay. While he remained in sight, the others waved and shouted after him, all except Haruka, who wished, rather than believed Makoto to be as calm and collected as he had appeared, with no means of confirming it.

* * *

With an hour on their hands until Rin’s arrival, Nagisa made good on his word and ushered his friends towards the nearest patisserie, where Rei and Haruka, one overly indulgent and the other struggling with his conscience, declined Nagisa’s offer to treat them, then combined their allowances to buy three slices of strawberry shortcake. Ever so prepared, Rei even informed the clerk behind the counter of the special occasion, which produced one slice with festive candy decorations and a lit golden candle. Nagisa gasped as a smiling waitress set it in front of him, wishing him happy birthday.

“It would have been nicer to have everyone here with us,” said Nagisa once she had retired from their table, blue flames dancing in his eyes as he stared at the candle, “but since Mako-chan had to go and Rin-chan doesn’t like cake anyway, this is the next best thing, right?”

 _I don’t like cake either_ , thought Haru, but he stayed silent, for the idea immediately produced another: _Makoto would have loved it, though_.

_Makoto…_

“That’s right. Happy birthday, Nagisa-kun!” beamed Rei, ready to make the best of the others’ absence for his friend’s sake.

“Happy birthday, Nagisa,” joined in Haru, his monotone less flattering, though equally sincere. Nagisa certainly thought so, for he awarded both with a jubilant grin.

“Make a wish and blow out your candle, Nagisa-kun,” said Rei next, forcing his eyes away from a thin trickle of wax rolling towards the creamy top of Nagisa’s slice.

“Righto!” chirruped the birthday boy, who screwed his eyes shut, puffed his cheeks impressively round, then blew out his candle in a gust that tickled Rei’s front bangs. When Nagisa opened his eyes to a stream of smoke coiling towards the ceiling, he gave himself a round of applause, which Rei and Haruka echoed with varying degrees of enthusiasm.

Having skipped lunch and eaten nothing on the train, even Haru was sufficiently glad to have his slice of cake and a glass of water, and once everyone rejuvenated from all the sugar, they returned to the subject of relays again. They reminisced with growing fondness of their first, and even spared a few kind words for their second, until Rei decided to check his watch and let out an undignified squeak.

“What is it, Rei-chan?” asked Nagisa, brow quirked as Rei patted himself down to find his phone, then dialed Rin’s number posthaste. It only rang once.

“Matsuoka,” the recipient rasped on the other end, evidently ill-humored. Rei swallowed.

“Rin-senpai? It’s Rei, Ryuugazaki Rei.”

“Rei? ...Where are you? Why aren’t you guys at the station?” griped Rin, understandably morose after standing outside for some ten minutes without the slightest hint of a welcoming committee on the way. “I called Makoto two times and he hasn’t picked up at all.”

“Makoto-san had to leave early because he had made a promise to his family,” explained Rei, one hand dabbing his forehead with a handkerchief, “but we are sitting in the patisserie on the corner. Koiaji Patisserie? You should be able to see it from where you are.”

“Patisserie? Ah, right—”

“So come on in and have some cake, Rin-chan!” Nagisa blared by Rei’s ear. Haru rolled his eyes.

“You know I don’t like cake,” grumbled Rin. “Can’t we have real food instead?”

“Like what?” asked Nagisa next, perching himself on Rei’s shoulder despite the other’s protests.

“I don’t know..” muttered Rin, eyes scanning a row of storefronts across the street until a familiar sight drew his gaze. His stomach lurched in relief, positively starved for something savory and solid. “There’s this curry place across from me, left of Koiaji. Meet me there, alright?”

“Of course,” replied Rei, and with that, the three of them gathered their bags to join their friend next door for some well-deserved dinner.

* * *

Once the four of them had united inside the restaurant and ordered their food, conversation resumed with the inclusion of Rin, whose tongue had loosened over his own bus ride, and now inclined heavily towards nostalgia. With the help of Rei and Nagisa, they revived childhood memories Haru had long forgotten, like Rin wanting to make rainbows in the pool, or Rei and Nagisa’s poolside shenanigans. Even the pink one-piece made a cameo in the process, but Haruka’s eyes glazed over in reverie, chopsticks picking idly at his green curry. _No apples… less cumin. Green peas. Hmm..._

At first Haru did do his best to pay attention to the others, but their chatter soon bounced off the impenetrable walls of his mind, while his thoughts within leaped and scattered at every turn. To hear Rin speak so freely, so animatedly as he hadn’t done in years warmed Haruka’s heart, but the idea that there was no Makoto at the table to eat green curry, no Makoto to listen to them, and no Makoto to contribute to their pool of memories produced constant pangs. Harmony, good humor, and candor ruled their table, yet Haru felt they were strumming a guitar with a missing chord. _Did Makoto’s parents really arrange to go camping right after the relay?_ And if they did… why didn’t Makoto tell him?

“A toast!”

Haruka winced. He had phased out. What did he miss?

“Haru, stop daydreaming!” he heard Rin say, his words accented by a few playful nudges of Nagisa’s elbow to direct Haru’s attention to a tray in the middle, with one glass of barley tea still unclaimed. Haru curled his fingers around it. Nagisa gave him an eager nod.

“Raise your glass, Haru-chan! We’re making a toast!”

“To our beautiful friendship!” offered Rei.

“To another great relay!” joined in Nagisa.

“To our dreams!” blared Rin, his toothy grin tempting, yet Haru’s smile twisted in contemplation.

“Do you mean.. you’re still following your dad’s dream?” he said at last, his eyebrows knit in a way reminiscent of his concerned looks on that secluded path of memories. Rin huffed, but his expression spoke of no misgivings.

“No, I’m not following my dad’s dream. I’m following my own dream,” he replied, his features serene and resolute as ever. “What about you, Haru?”

“Me? I’m…”

His face went blank as he grasped at straws. Nagisa shook his head in amusement.

“What do _you_ toast to, Haru-chan?”

“Makoto,” blurted Haruka, to be met with obvious surprise after so much talk that did not include the absent in the slightest. Haru cleared his throat, forcing himself to look at the others. “We should toast, to Makoto.”

“Ah, that’s right. We wouldn’t have been able to swim together again if it hadn’t been for Mako-chan,” replied Nagisa with a smile, much softer than his grins had been.

“To Makoto-san, then,” said Rei, lifting his glass a little higher.

“Alright, alright,” said Rin at last, clinking his own glass to the others’. “To Makoto.”

As glass clicked against glass, a vague smile drifted across Haru’s lips, then slipped away as he caught Rin’s eyes, who took a long sip, his lazy gaze never leaving Haruka’s, then set his glass down, pushing it aside so he could prop his elbow on the table.

“So, tell me about Makoto, then,” Rin tucked his hand under his chin, smiling like he had all the time in the world, and no unpleasant past encounters to taint his understanding. If anything, he hoped their stories might flesh out Makoto’s character more, so the phantom boy on the pier could finally transform into the flesh and blood high school student who had sacrificed himself to save them all. “Where did you even find this guy? He wasn’t a swimmer before he joined, right?”

“That’s right,” began Rei, rolling his glass back and forth between his fingers. “Makoto-san told us he had learned how to swim at age seven, but he didn’t swim at all afterwards, and he joined the track and field club at the start of the year.”

“Track and field?” blinked Rin, having expected something more along the lines of martial arts, something to explain Makoto’s large, muscular build. _Although..._ “Ah, I see now,” he carried on in newfound confidence. “He was a thrower, right? What was it? Shot-put? Discus? _Hammer?_ ”

“Pole vault,” spoke Haru. Rin hummed, confused. Haru cleared his throat. “He pole vaulted.”

“Mako-chan is also a really good runner!” chimed in Nagisa. “Back at camp, he was faster than any of us, remember, Rei-chan?”

“He is surprisingly fast on land,” conceded Rei with tinged cheeks, a little upset his own times could not compare, while Rin stared at them with sour looks, put out by the thought that Makoto wasn’t at least a hammer thrower.

“Alright, so he was doing track and field. How did you get him to join you, then?”

“Ah, haha, we.. we kinda pressured Mako-chan into joining,” Nagisa giggled nervously. “Mako-chan really didn’t want to, but we were kinda pressed for time with joint practice…”

Haru twitched, but it took Rin a moment to recollect that fateful Thursday afternoon.

“Right, joint practice,” he muttered, the corners of his lips sinking as the reel of his mind spun round and round, back to the Samezuka indoor pool. “Wait, hold on, the guy had bruises. _Big_ ones. And then he butchered his entry. It was really embarrassing—”

“How do you know that?” squinted Haru. “You disappeared right before we started.”

Rin’s cheeks flared pink.

“D-Don’t think too much into it!” he snapped, grabbing his glass to take a sip, but the motion broke half way as Rin flicked his wrist. “I just passed by on the way out, that’s all.”

Rei opened his mouth to comment, then closed it as Rin shot him a warning glare.

“Okay, but seriously,” Rin furrowed his brow, “he probably didn’t even know how to swim and he had bruises, so how did he even agree to this? Is he a pushover or what?”

“Rin..!” hissed Haru, eyes flashing.

“Makoto-san is… incredibly good-natured,” mumbled Rei.

“Pushover, then,” Rin waved a hand, then cupped his chin as he shifted in his seat, ignoring the way Haruka pelted him with icy glares. “He had a really rough time, though, so how did you manage to make him stay after _that?_ ”

“We ah… we kinda pressured him again,” admitted Nagisa, squirming in his seat as the history of Makoto’s recruitment gradually lost all the luster their gladness over securing a fourth member had applied in abundance. “Mako-chan was gonna get kicked off the track team anyway, so we just—”

“ _What?_ What did he do?!” blurted Rin, eyes wide at the prospect of something scandalous. Haru averted his eyes, unable to look at anyone as he replied,

“He knocked down the equipment during a pole vault.”

“What, like the crossbar?”

Rei shook his head.

“He hit the crossbar with such force the support beams toppled over,” he explained, pressing a heavy hand to his glasses. “Nobody was injured, but it was a dangerous accident.”

“Mako-chan is really strong, and sometimes forgets how strong he is, ehe, heh..” Nagisa trailed off, he and Rei now staring at Nagisa’s hands for some reason. Rin raised a brow.

“But I think Mako-chan really joined because of Haru-chan,” carried on Nagisa. “Mako-chan goes to his class so they became good friends, you see.”

“He did join because I asked him to,” allowed Haruka, unable to own to anything else he might have done to shamelessly cajole Makoto. Rin scoffed.

“So all of you bullied him into joining, _especially you,_ ” he concluded with a jab of his finger, noting with a smug grin that Haru failed to reprimand him this time. “And I suppose you taught him how to swim, but Ai told me he really sucked—”

“ _Ai?!_ ” chimed in Nagisa, the others equally curious. Rin flushed.

“Nitori.. Aiichiro,” he mumbled, lips twitching. “You know…! Short. Gray hair.”

“Aaah, that’s right, _Ai-chan!_ ” Nagisa clapped his hands, earning a sickly look from Rin. “Your friend at Samezuka Academy, right, Rin-chan?”

“Kinda.. Yeah,” nodded Rin, his features softened despite the others’ telltale looks.

“I’m glad to hear you managed to make a friend despite going through a difficult phase, Rin-senpai,” said Rei above his glass, in a tone way too condescending for Rin’s liking.

“I wonder what drew Ai-chan to him,” added Nagisa with a cheeky squint at Rei. “Was it all the dark and mysterious brooding?”

“No, it was his teeth. Limited _Jaws_ edition,” said Haru, taking a long sip of his barley tea. Rin’s breath whistled between his teeth and bottom lip, convinced smoke was pouring from his ears that very second.

“ _Enough about me and Ai!_ ” he slammed his glass on the table for emphasis. “This subject is closed! _Back to Makoto!_ He sucked at prefecturals, _explain that!_ ”

“Well, um… Mako-chan… doesn’t really like the water,” Nagisa scratched his cheek with a finger, his grin fragile. Rin’s brow flattened.

“He doesn’t like water? What, so he doesn’t like swimming?”

Haru pursed his lips. Rei swallowed.

“Makoto-san… has aquaphobia.”

“ _Huh?_ ”

“He’s.. afraid of water,” mumbled Haru, half wishing he and his chair would just sink beneath the ground and straight into hell. Across from him, Rin’s jaw had definitely hit a new depth, for it took him a whole minute of incredulous warbling and half-baked gestures towards Haru to break out of paralysis.

“Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah, _hold up!_ ” he cried at last, jabbing an accusing finger at Haru. “Are you telling me that a guy who’s _afraid of water_ joined the _swim club_ and _willingly swam for hours every day_ because **_Haru asked him to?_** ”

“Yup, pretty much!” shrugged Nagisa with a hapless smile. Haruka twisted in his seat as those words peppered his back with sweat. Judging by the look on Rin’s face, he wasn’t nearly done being flabbergasted at Makoto’s ridiculous backstory.

“You’re, you’re kidding me, right?” he stuttered, one hand raking through his hair. “But the ocean, you guys swam _a whole week in the ocean!_ If he’s afraid of water, wouldn’t he have been too terrified to swim?!”

Rei tugged at his already loose tracksuit collar, but air escaped him regardless.

“I… believe it was the ocean that had caused Makoto-san’s aquaphobia in the first place...”

“The typhoon, that summer,” whispered Haruka. Rin’s eyes widened as his mind readily conjured the boy on the pier, gaping in horror at the funeral procession for Rin’s father and more fishermen than he could count or name.

“No wonder he looked so scared..” mumbled Rin. The others stared at him confused, but Rin failed to clarify. Instead he shook his head and turned to Haru again, taking a shot of barley tea to wet his dry throat.

“Okay, let me get this straight,” he began, brandishing the glass. “So you found a guy who not only puts up with you in class, but joined the swim club for you, and agreed to swim in the fucking ocean that caused his fears in the first place?”

“Pretty much..!” Nagisa repeated himself, as Haruka now hunched in his chair and fixed his gaze on a grain of rice dotting the polished surface of their table. Rin waited. Haruka lifted his eyes just barely, to find Rin relatively composed again, his tone perfectly calm as he said,

“Alright. When’s the wedding?”

“Rin..!” hissed Haru, only to be interrupted by a loud giggle from Nagisa.

“See, it really _is_ obvious!” he laughed, pointing finger guns.

“Nagisa!”

“Please stop this nonsense, both of you!” snapped Rei, whipping up a hand at Haru. “Can’t you see that Haruka-senpai is not interested in Makoto-san at all?!”

“ _Rei!_ ” cried Haru, now just plain exasperated. Rin and Nagisa struggled to contain themselves, but finally burst into laughter that took several coughs to ebb away, though once it did, Rin’s expression had sobered a great deal.

“I feel kinda bad for him now,” he mused, his hand curled into a fist by his cheek. “He had gone through all this trouble for _Haru_ of all people, and then he didn’t even get to swim in the relay because he offered to switch places with me and everyone accepted, just like that. If that had been me, I would have been furious with you guys! Like, what am I, _chopped liver?_ Am I really that easily replaceable by some other guy?”

He paused, lips parting to say more, but the others’ pale faces stunned him silent. Haru in particular stared back at him in dread. Rei’s hand trembled over his glasses.

“Are, are you trying to make us feel guilty for accepting his offer, Rin-senpai?” he managed to say. Rin lifted his hands defensively.

“ _No,_ _no,_ I’m glad you did, I’m really grateful to the guy! I’m just saying I kinda feel sorry for him for doing all that work for nothing.. I never realized he had it so rough.”

The air froze around them. Haru clenched his jaw.

“Stop that,” he said at last, turning to shoot Rin a glare. “Talk about Makoto properly.”

“Okay..” blinked Rin, glancing to the others. “How do you talk about Makoto properly?”

Nagisa and Rei shrugged their shoulders, unable to gauge Haruka’s meaning. Haru tensed.

“You could talk about how… how he’s a great older brother.”

Rin choked on his barley tea. Nagisa and Rei exchanged glances.

“I’m sure he is, Haruka-senpai,” risked Rei, “but I’ve only seen him interact with his siblings once or twice..”

“He’s always looking out for everyone,” offered Haru. “He always shares his food and drinks.”

“Mako-chan does look out for everyone, but I don’t remember him ever giving _me_ any of his food,” replied Nagisa, his cheeks puffed. “I’m pretty sure that’s just you, Haru-chan.”

“He, always seems to know what you’re thinking, without you, having to say anything…” stammered Haruka, increasingly flustered in the crossfire. Rei’s face was deadpan.

“I’m… sure…?”

 _“We get it, Haru!_ The guy’s a catch,” interrupted Rin. It was Haruka’s turn to choke. Rin picked up his glass again. “…You’d better make me your best man. Gou can be your maid of honor.”

“ _Eeeh?!_ But _I_ want to be the best man!” cried Nagisa, earning a scowl from Rei.

“That is not for either of you to decide, Nagisa-kun! Besides, as _vice-captain,_ I am certain that _I am_ the most eligible—”

“I’m, going to, _get a drink!_ ” blurted Haruka as he kicked back his chair, all but storming down a narrow hallway in the back of the restaurant. The others remained seated, staring after him, but the moment they turned back to each other and their eyes met, all three burst into repressed laughter again.

“We pissed him off so bad..!” cackled Rin, his shoulders quaking in a futile effort to be quiet. Nagisa pressed a hand to his mouth and Rei took off his glasses to wipe his crinkled eyes, but after a solid minute of breathless giggles, he composed himself and dropped his hands, staring at his empty plate. Rin wiped his own eyes with the back of his hand, his grin wilting at Rei’s expression.

“You okay, Rei?” he found himself asking, forcing his features to match his tone. Rei cracked a small smile.

“I’m quite alright, Rin-senpai. There’s no need to worry about me. I was just thinking about what you had said about Makoto-san. How you yourself would have been furious in his place.”

“It would be really bad if Mako-chan got angry at us and left the swim club,” explained Nagisa, having caught Rei’s meaning. “He’s the only friend Haru-chan has in class…”

“So Haru’s still a loner, huh?” muttered Rin, his finger drawing circles over his corner of the table. “Figures… he hasn’t really changed, has he?”

“Haru-chan hasn’t changed a whole lot,” mused Nagisa, “but he’s happier than he used to be, and Mako-chan is really important to him. It would be bad if Mako-chan had enough of us after all. He said he had to leave early because his family’s going camping in the morning, but now I’m.. kinda worried.”

“You’d know better than I do, since I only met him a few times,” frowned Rin, “but from what I’ve seen, he’s not the kind of guy who would just quit like that. I mean, he travelled to Samezuka just to have a go at me over you guys and Gou. If he could do that, you have to be important to him, right? Important enough for him to.. to do this for you.”

Rei and Nagisa turned to each other. Nagisa stared at Rei expectantly. Rei broke into a smile.

“You’re right, Rin-senpai. He did say he would wait… which must mean he still wants to swim with us in the future.”

“That’s right,” nodded Nagisa, his smile hopeful. “We always scold Mako-chan for not believing in himself, so it’s our turn to believe in him this time.”

Rin hummed, then raised his near-empty glass on a whim.

“To Makoto,” he said, waiting for them to lift their own in a series of soft clinks.

“ _To Makoto._ ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally, Part 5 was going to be a single chapter. However, when what were originally transitional scenes became some eight pages, and the reunion itself burgeoned to some ten pages, with another important scene still coming up, I decided to split it into two chapters while retaining the integrity of the 5-part structure by branching Part 5 instead of introducing a Part 6. Based on the designator, you can probably guess where this is going...


	67. EPISODE 12: Distant Free! - Part 5 (Despair)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As soon as Makoto turned around to leave the others, he broke into a light jog that he managed to maintain all the way to the steps leading to their wooden gate. On the surface, he merely wished to put his friends’ minds at ease with his even, leisurely pace, but beneath his solicitude lurked a more selfish consideration, the need to reinforce in his own mind that he was simply hurrying home to appease his family, instead of fleeing from the prospect of an entire evening in the company of Matsuoka Rin. Though Makoto was now disposed for everyone’s sakes to think more kindly of their favorite, and to befriend Rin should they meet more often in the future, he trusted his instincts when they urged him to withdraw at the first available opportunity to lick his wounds. With every one of his dearest plans thoroughly dashed by what turned out to be misfortune instead of a blessing, Makoto desperately needed more time so he could process all that had happened at regionals, tranquilize his own heart, and fortify himself against whatever new course the swim club would take... and a week’s repose far away from all former sources of grief, which now became a dire necessity as well as a source of pleasure, was Makoto’s last bastion standing.

At least he had the comfort of having told his friends the truth instead of another lie. Makoto had indeed discussed camping with his family a week before regionals, as the twins were itching to go on a real holiday and spend more time with their brother, and their parents felt it equally desirous not to postpone their vacation any further… and had things turned out differently… _But it doesn’t matter now._ In hindsight, Makoto should have mentioned his plans to Haru and the others in advance, but like everyone else, he had been so engrossed by the upcoming relay that he had quite forgotten about camping, until the idea resurfaced at a convenient moment as a perfectly legitimate reason to leave early. Makoto dared not mention it before and during the bus ride, for fear it might result in a prolonged siege to persuade him, but by the time they had arrived to Iwatobi Station, he was more than ready to make a final sacrifice, and give up an hour he could have spared from packing to appear like he was obliged to forgo every amusement that evening, even ones he would have gladly indulged in otherwise. _Nagisa… I’m sorry._

The more Makoto thought of his removal from their party, the more his cheeks seared in guilt and shame, but he hoped his friends would trust him just this once, and assume no ill will behind his last-minute excuse. Indeed, the further Makoto had gotten from everyone, the more he could wish with all his heart that they might have a wonderful evening with their friend, with plenty of time to catch up on each other’s lives. In fact, excusing himself and allowing them the privacy and comfort of their original circle was probably the proper thing to do. This way, they might be able to reminisce more openly than they could have done in the presence of ( _filler_ ) someone new, someone who ( _doesn’t belong_ ) probably wouldn’t understand much without thorough explanation anyway…

When the wooden gate swam into view, Makoto heaved a sigh. Their house curled into the hillside like a sleepy cat, its curtains half drawn and windows dimmed, so Makoto drew a few long breaths through his nose, reassuring himself his family might be half asleep by now, tucked away in their rooms to finish packing, or getting some rest before their early start tomorrow. If Makoto slipped in quietly enough, they might not even notice him, and should he mind his every move upstairs until the late hours, there was every chance of an undisturbed dinner for one straight from the refrigerator. How quaint and peaceful it would all be...

After paying his respects to the goldfish outside, to relay his unhappy news in a whisper to the only souls he could bear to witness his sorrow, Makoto let himself inside the house and used both hands to glide the front door closed, his shoulders slumping in relief when it clicked as faintly as the tap of a fly against glass. He snuck over to the shoe cabinet next, not bothering with the light switch while he shed his sneakers… except the hallway burst into a sickly yellow the moment he did remove them, revealing his parents and siblings gathered by the staircase. His parents were sitting on the bottom steps, Ren pushing himself upright in his father’s lap to rub his eyes in the glare of the light, and Ran poking her head out from behind the wall, her hand still on the switch she had flicked on cue. Makoto’s heart jolted as his eyes widened in a soundless scream, painfully aware his face had petrified in a grimace instead of a smile to match their own when they rose from their seats to greet him, gathering in a cluster that completely blocked his way to safety.

“Welcome home, Makoto,” said his mother, her smile faltering at her son’s expression. “Did we scare you, sweetheart?”

It took a few seconds, but Makoto forced a laugh and pressed a hand to his chest, grateful beyond measure that she had given him an excuse to look as he felt: absolutely terrified.

“Y-Yeah, I thought.. you might all be upstairs getting ready,” he breathed, lowering his duffel bag to the floor before it might have slipped from his shoulder and hit the ground. Opposite him, the twins bounced on their heels, calling out to him, only to be shushed by their father’s hand on their shoulders. In a moment he gathered them to his sides, restraining them in a hug.

“Well, son, how was the relay?” he asked, beaming at the prospect of hearing good news for a change. Makoto swallowed hard, his hands finding each other in front of him to wring his fingers. One of his joints popped as he wrenched away. Makoto didn’t notice.

“We.. we won,” he forced another smile. “Everyone was truly amazing.”

“Onii-chan! Onii-chan!” squealed the twins, who broke out of their father’s embrace to jump and dance in joy.

“Oh, Makoto!” breathed his mother, turning to her husband to take his hands, the two squeezing back and forth as gladness poured over them in waves. Though they did not flail about like the twins, both quivered in obvious excitement, feet squirming and their hands trembling in the other’s hold.

“Congratulations, Makoto!” cried his father too, torn between wishing to sit down somewhere with everyone for a detailed discussion, and the urge to just rush forth and tackle the eldest in a bear hug, for Makoto’s happy accomplishments had been more than deserved and incredibly overdue. He took a step forward, drawing his wife along.

“Well, don’t just stand there, son, come and tell us everything! How was your backstroke? If only we could have gone to see it..!”

Makoto’s heart gave a leap.

Silence screamed, because he couldn’t. The seconds ticked away, but all Makoto could do was stare at them in growing dread as his strained grin melted like wax, his hands clenching hard enough to turn his knuckles white.

“I…”

His family held their breath, teetering on edge. Ran and Ren pulled closer to their parents. Makoto gritted his teeth.

“…I didn’t swim,” he forced out the truth, pulling the words from his throat like splinters. Opposite him, the others flinched, gaping wordlessly at each other as the news sank in and dragged them down, not to earth but into a chasm they thought had closed forever. Their faces paled in the glow of that inexorable hallway light and Makoto shrank backwards, half wishing he could just disappear.

“You didn’t swim..?” echoed his father, his brow arched in disbelief.

“But you said you _won!_ ” demanded Ren, his hand gripping his father’s cardigan. Makoto lowered his head. The floorboards swirled under his feet.

“We won the relay… but I didn’t swim. Rin.. everyone, _everyone_ wanted to swim with Rin again, they _needed_ to swim with Rin again, so I gave up my place so he could swim.”

“You _what?!_ ” cried his father and Makoto whipped up his head, shuddering at the thought of finding him furious after all these years of understanding and patience, but far from angry, his father seemed hurt, betrayed even. His lips twitched, and though the words didn’t come, Makoto could hear the question lodged in his father’s throat, _Why, why, **why?**_

“ _Believe me_ , I wanted to swim more than anything!” Makoto began, his voice swelling into a shriek as air left his chest like a deflated balloon. “But I had no other choice! It was the _only_ way to make Haru happy! It was the only way to help everyone move forward! It’s, it’s _fine!_ It was _my_ decision! I made them do it, _so it’s fine..!_ ”

His hands trembled in the air, eyes searching for the smallest hint of having been understood, but nobody could answer him. His desperation had stunned them silent. Even the twins seemed dazed, Ran clinging to their mother’s waist and Ren wringing the hem of his father’s cardigan till it bunched up into swirls between his fingers.

Cold sweat poured down Makoto’s back, drenching his shirt. Their slackened jaws and large eyes, the way their brows knit together chilled him to his core.

“But, _son,_ Rin is _not_ their teammate! _You are!_ ” exclaimed his father when he at last found his voice, releasing his wife’s hands to flail at Makoto. “ _You_ are the one who joined the swim club, who trained day and night so you could swim with them! After all you’ve been through, after all you’ve done for them, how could you let them _do this to you?!_ ”

“Because they _needed_ _this!_ ” cried Makoto, his fists tightening till his nails dug into his palms. “Haru, and Rin, _all of them_ , they needed this so they could move forward!”

“They this, _they that!_ _What about **you?!**_ ” snapped his father at long last, though his anger flared pained and warm with righteous indignation. “What about _your_ needs, Makoto?! You’ve been miserable this entire term, _they_ made you miserable whether they had intended to or not, and now you had to give up everything all over again for Haru and _some stranger?_ Can they only move forward at _your_ expense?! Was leaving you behind really the _only_ _way..?_ ”

He paused, chest jolting as the air turned thin around them, but Makoto stared back at him wide-eyed, unable to speak.

“Aren’t you tired of this, Makoto..?” breathed his father on the verge of his breakdown, his hands held out as if he were begging for mercy. “ _Don’t you want **more** than this..?_ ”

Makoto’s heart stopped as all eyes turned from his father and fixed on him, finally realizing the look on their faces wasn’t disappointment or anger. It was pity.

He tried to open his mouth, but his jaws had frozen together. His insides lurched, then vanished as voices filled the void, voices that rang as hollow as Makoto felt.

_We are a team, aren’t we, Makoto-san?_

_Every member is irreplaceable, Mako-chan!_

_I’m looking forward to racing Rin again._

**_In the end, you’ve been nothing but a spare._ **

_Haru! Don’t let it win..!_

_Please. . ._

**_But Haru didn’t move for you, did he?_ **

Makoto’s eyes grew large and glassy as his lips split apart over rows of gritted teeth. He set his jaws till his cheeks turned numb, till his fingers fell apart unable to clench anymore, but the more he strained to deflect his father’s words, the more he bled until the hallway and their faces blurred into sludge. Hot flashes rippled behind Makoto’s eyes, threatening to erupt and he squinted, half afraid he might scream if he opened his mouth, though his cords had snapped and his throat had sealed shut long ago.

 _“..Of course_ I want more than this…” he bleated as his defenses crumbled, his voice strangled beyond recognition. “But it’s _impossible._ This, this was never about _me._ I’m not, the one Haru needed. And this, this was what I signed up for. I joined the swim club so they could swim with their friends. And it’s fine, really, _it’s fine_ , because I’m just..”

**_Filler._ **

“I just…”

**_Don’t belong anywhere._ **

**_Go on. Say it. You know it’s true, don’t you?_ **

His parents clutched each other’s hands again for support, the twins still clinging to them in fear. Makoto gasped for air.

 _“Because I just want to go camping with you,”_ he cried with the last of his strength, just barely scraping together a grin to match the words. “Is, is everyone ready?! Are we all set to go?”

His parents exchanged weary looks. The twins blinked, confused at his sudden change of topic.

“Yes,” said their mother, her voice barely above a whisper. “You’re the only one still unpacked.”

“ _That’s great!_ ” cried Makoto, forcing himself to look them in the eye, though the world stung and pulsed until something warm and wet blinded him. “I can’t wait! _I can’t.. wait…_ ”

He hung his head and swallowed hard, his shoulders quaking under the tracksuit jacket. His mother let go of her husband’s hands and stepped forward, but as if he had anticipated her, Makoto closed the gap faster and seized her arms with firm tenderness, managing to stop her before she might have embraced her broken son and shattered him in front of everyone.

“I’ll pack, okay?” he said, his grip like a vice. “I’ll go and pack right now!”

And with that, Makoto pushed past them and fled up the staircase two steps at a time, the door upstairs slamming shut behind him.

For a long moment, his family remained where they stood, too wretched to move or speak, but as Ren left his father’s side to draw closer to his sister and mother, shivering and hardly knowing why, their father pursed his lips and whirled around to face the stairs.

His sleeve snagged two steps in, caught in his wife’s clammy hand.

“Don’t..!” she whispered, unable to raise her voice. “Give him some time.”

“ _No!_ ” he tugged his arm, but the fabric screeched beneath her nails. He balled his hands into fists, glaring holes into the ceiling. “I can’t take this anymore! I said it before and I’ll say it again: I am _not_ putting my son into an early grave over a swim club, and especially not over _some guy named Haru!_ ”

“He’s.. very attached to that boy,” muttered his wife, more to the railing than to him. He huffed.

“Being friends is one thing, I know how much Makoto wanted to make friends, but this is too much! He’s become their punching bag over this guy! I don’t understand..!”

“Perhaps.. Makoto likes him more than we first thought,” she mumbled, grasping at straws herself. Her husband twitched and spun around.

“You don’t mean...” he pleaded, his voice faltering.

His wife shrugged her shoulders, brow creased. He stared back devastated.

“I cannot believe it,” his gaze trailed into space. “I thought you and I had set him a good example… I was sure he would pick someone worthy in time, a nice girl or a nice boy, god knows I don’t care anymore, but he has _terrible taste!_ Couldn’t he have found some other boy? Surely there are _some_ guys in Iwatobi who would appreciate all this effort?!”

She gave him a look half incredulous, half relieved, but he heaved a broken sigh and fumbled for her hands again, abandoning the steps as he pressed them to his heart and bonked his forehead against hers.

“I don’t get it,” he whispered, his hold as tight as his son’s had been on her arms. “He’s such a good kid, and he works so hard… so why don’t they love him..?”

Beside them, Ran and Ren flinched and exchanged anxious looks, their faces scrunched up with the same wish that had initially coaxed their father onto the staircase: to hurry upstairs to Makoto. They risked a peek at their parents, but they didn’t notice, so the twins left their mother’s side without a word to climb the stairs, leaving her to comfort their poor father as best she could.

Upstairs, they pried Makoto’s door open to find him kneeling in front of his drawers, his clothes in a dog-eared pile on the floor. He hunched over the last open drawer motionless, too scared to turn his head and face whoever had come to argue with him, but he didn’t need to. In a moment they pulled the door shut and came bounding over, slamming into his back as hard as the others must have collided with Haru by the block, arms entwined around their brother’s hunched shoulders.

“Don’t worry, Onii-chan,” said Ren, nudging his head to the nape of Makoto’s neck. “ _We’ll_ love you.”

For a moment, Makoto thought he would suffocate. The bramble of their stiff little arms was nothing compared to how deeply those words had plunged and punctured him, and yet Makoto lived, in spite of everything he lived, so he curled his arms around them, gathering them into a hug he needed more than air, more than anything in the world.

Nobody spoke for a while, savoring the moment tongue-tied, until Makoto could no longer bear to stay silent in the face of such kindness.

“Thank you,” he whispered, hoping his voice wouldn’t crackle under the weight. The twins sighed in unison, squeezing a little more before they drew back to look their brother in the face.

They found him awfully worn, but no longer beyond consolation. Ran took a deep breath.

“What will you do now, Onii-chan?”

Makoto blinked.

“Are you going to leave the swim club after all?” chimed in Ren to clarify his sister’s words. Makoto’s breath hitched, but he swallowed hard and gathered them close again not to see him struggle so much.

“I… I don’t know,” he said to be truthful. “I know this didn’t turn out.. that none of this was what I had hoped for… but I, I don’t want to give up just yet.” He took a deep breath to drown out the quiver of his heart. “After everything we’ve been through, after all we’ve said and promised to each other, I need to, I want to believe in them, and I think, I still want to swim with them someday. I know I’m not the one they really needed, and it hurts, I won’t deny it hurts, but… just because I wasn’t needed, doesn’t mean I can’t be wanted, right?”

The twins pulled back again and Makoto let them this time, having since mustered the strength for a hopeful smile, frail though it was.

“Not needed, but still wanted?” echoed Ren, but Ran’s eyes lit up in thought.

“I get it! So Onii-chan is kinda like chocolate!” she grinned, and when met with confused looks, she went on to add, “I mean, we could all live without chocolate, but we wouldn’t want to because it’s delicious! So Onii-chan is chocolate!”

Makoto pursed his lips, but laughter escaped him regardless.

“Chocolate, huh..” he mumbled, his cheeks tinted pink. “Thank you. I’ll keep that in mind.”

Ran winked at Ren, who clapped his hands thoroughly impressed. Makoto cleared his throat.

“But,” he began, his voice lowered, “for now, I have a favor to ask.”

The twins gasped.

“Ask anything, Onii-chan,” whispered Ren.

“We’ll do whatever you want!” promised Ran. Makoto smothered a laugh at their eagerness.

“I don’t want to decide anything right now,” he began, drinking in the glow of their affectionate smiles. “I don’t want to think about it for a while, either. I want next week to be all about us spending time together. I’ve spent enough time at school and the swim club, so for now, I just want to be with my family. So, during next week, if you ever see me mope, even a little, promise you’ll shake me hard, and give me something to do. I think I would love to take plenty of walks and play with you. What do you say?”

The twins grinned at each other, then at him, perfectly satisfied with his request.

“Leave it to us, Onii-chan!” was their reply, embracing him again.

“We will not let you mope even for a second!”

“Do you know where we’ll go?” asked Makoto next, realizing they had discussed little beyond fixing the actual date of departure. Ren and Ran beamed.

“Dad said we’ll go to the mountains, near the health resort!” said Ren.

“Mom said we could even bring our swimsuits to swim in the pool and try the hot springs!” added Ran. “Onii-chan could come with us this time!”

“Yeah, you can swim now!” said Ren, bouncing in one place. “Will you swim, Onii-chan?”

Makoto shook his head fondly, which wilted their enthusiasm, but his smile soon widened with a small sigh.

“I suppose I will,” he said softly, basking in their joy at the sudden plot twist. “I might as well, since I never did get to swim today. Maybe I could teach you how to swim backstroke while we’re at it. It’s a little tricky at first, but—”

“Will you?!” gasped the twins. Makoto laughed, this time in earnest.

“I will. ...But now I need to pack so we can go.”

“Will Onii-chan eat dinner first?” asked Ran next. “We were going to have dinner at six, but we decided to wait for you.”

Makoto hesitated, his lips pursed in guilt.

“I.. I think I’ll pack first, just to be safe. Could you tell mom?”

“Okay,” replied Ren. Makoto’s shoulders slackened in relief.

“Thank you. Now, go and have dinner, and then go to bed, okay? We leave early, you know.”

“Yes, yes!” pouted the twins, but they kissed Onii-chan goodnight, then went away to relay his message to their mother, leaving Makoto in better spirits than they had found him. Their mother proved understanding, as she and her husband had both lost their appetite, but after a long and quiet dinner, Makoto’s father could be persuaded to let it go and lie down while his mother prepared the table, knocking briefly on her son’s door on her way to the master bedroom to let him know his food was ready.

Makoto thanked her from beyond the door, and in half an hour, he left his room to have dinner for one, even if it had turned out differently than he had planned. He cleaned up after himself, no longer bothering to mind his every move, then crawled back upstairs and into bed with a heavy heart, aching with grief till his last moment of consciousness.

* * *

As Nagisa, Rei, and Rin were obliged to take the last train from Iwatobi Station, their party eventually dispersed on the platform, where the others waved to Haruka from the windows of their respective coaches until their figures shrank into the distance, leaving Haru to head home alone. He turned away with a sigh, dragging his feet on the path that must have brought his friend to his family, but the idea gave Haru little comfort. He only broke his monotonous pace halfway across the bay, stopping to stare at the water for answers.

All things considered, Haruka’s evening had been pleasant enough. In his haste to escape the others’ ridiculous talk of weddings and best men, swearing he would not pick any of them if that fateful day ever came, Haru accidentally wandered down the corridor leading to the bathrooms, which earned him another round of teasing when he returned to their table still flustered and without a drink. Nevertheless, despite how much they had laughed at him, or thrown all his former misdeeds in his face, Haru was forced to admit, if only to himself, that having Rin restored to their circle of friends had been more than he had ever hoped for. The weight that once pinned his shoulders to the ground had crumbled away, and for all his troubled thoughts that evening, all of them whirling around Makoto, Rin’s toothy grins had rekindled that small flame inside Haruka’s heart, the blaze of that stronger self he once held sacred. After so many years spent in the shroud of guilt and misery, Haru’s monochrome world had finally burst into glorious technicolor.

And yet… What if Rin was right?

Haru’s eyes bore into the waves that rolled towards the horizon in a continuous shrug, fear creeping across his mind on icy tendrils. Was Makoto suffering beneath all the courage and forbearance he had shown after all? Haru could not be sure, had still much to learn about the lines and arches of Makoto’s face and all the little secrets tucked away in his heart, but could he really expect someone selfless to a fault and punished for it at every turn to have no limits of generosity or patience?

In his heart of hearts, Haru desperately held onto the idea that he could if it was Makoto, but more tender feelings protested it entirely. In light of all they had done to coerce him before, and all they demanded of him afterwards, Haru was forced to concede that they had abused Makoto’s affections for them, with too little done for him in return.

His hands clenched at the thought. It would not do. _Not anymore._

Haru took a deep breath and tore his eyes away from the ocean, breaking into a sprint down the path. He conquered the hill in a matter of minutes, stopping only once to catch his breath, but when he had at last reached the wooden gate, he found the Tachibanas’ house completely retired for the night. Haru pursed his lips in disappointment. His friends’ time of departure from Iwatobi Station should have been indication enough that he would return entirely too late to see Makoto, but Haru didn’t despair. Not yet.

He pressed his hands together by the gate to honor the goldfish, making a promise he could bear no other soul to hear, then left for the single torii in the same swift stride that had brought him to his friend’s house, to hurry home and set an early alarm for tomorrow. After all his best friend had done for him, for all the times Makoto had watched over him, Haru would return the favor at last, and repay Makoto’s kindness in full.

**_TO BE CONCLUDED…_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter, I told you all in the end notes how I wrote most parts of that chapter to music. Well, this chapter was what started it, because I managed to write Makoto's part before I even composed the relay, and anything that came with and after it. I wrote the entire scene with Makoto and his family to "Tranquillezza for String" (from the soundtrack of _Ouran High School Host Club_ ), because it is one of those emotional, heartwrenching melodies that always make me cry.
> 
> Haruka's part was written to the track "I Need You" from the anime's own soundtrack. Also, there is one more FrFr! bonus chapter coming before the conclusion, and I will be posting it on Sunday. Stay tuned!


	68. FrFr! - Kou, Our Expert Photographer!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first five bonus chapters were published on certain characters’ birthdays, and going by this logic, I was unable to dedicate one to Kou, whose birthday is still undetermined after three years (shame on you, Kyoani). However, since FrFr! 6, published on April 1 as a joke, broke this pattern, and because some kind readers liked the idea, I decided I would write one more bonus chapter and dedicate it to Kou, because she deserves it!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Wednesday, August 7, 2013.**

“Can you hear us clearly, Kou-san?” Rei’s voice crackled through her headset. The video feed wobbled as Nagisa and Rei’s hands tugged his older brother’s laptop in opposing directions, but at last they found an angle they could agree on and propped themselves on their elbows, apparently sprawled out on Rei’s bed. Perched on the top bunk of her bed with her back against the wall and legs dangling over the edge, Kou tilted the screen of her own laptop backwards.

“Yes,” she replied as she adjusted the microphone one more time, earning a thumbs-up from Nagisa and a contented smile from Rei.

“Before we begin, how was your journey back, Kou-san?”

“From regionals? It was fun!” grinned Kou. “Ama-chan took us back to Iwatobi for ice cream, and Hana-chan’s friends told me we could have the banner for our club room!”

“Tell them I said hi!” came Chigusa’s voice from below, followed by her hand poking out beyond the edge of the top bunk for a lopsided wave. Her nails gleamed pink in the light. Kou gasped.

“You finished already!” she squeaked, catching herself a moment later. “Ah, guys, Hana-chan is here with me right now, she says hi!”

She then turned her laptop around so the boys could catch a glimpse of Chigusa’s rose-studded bun and her fingers wiggling in greeting.

“ _Chi-chan_ , hello, hello!” chirruped Nagisa, he and Rei uncurling an arm each to wave back. Chigusa giggled at the name.

“Hi, guys!” she inclined her head with a grin, though all they saw was her bun tipping to the side, then dipped below to apply a second coat on her left hand. Kou turned her laptop back to where it was.

“So why did you want to do a video call?” asked Nagisa as soon as she swam into view again. Kou’s hands slapped on her hips in obvious pride.

“I wanted to do a video call so I could show you pictures!”

She then reached beyond the frames of the camera to retrieve a slim fan of printed photographs, holding up a few at random for their viewing pleasure. Nagisa gasped.

“The ones from the relay!”

“That’s right! I thought I’d show you on video so you could pick the ones you want me to print out for you! Since Haruka-senpai had a picture of you from your first relay, I thought it would be nice to give these out so everyone could have one! I already gave some to Onii-chan!”

“Oh? When did you and your brother meet, Kou-san?” asked Rei next.

“He came to visit yesterday, so I showed him everything, including your pictures from our training camp!” winked Kou. “It was so much fun!”

“ _Oh nooo,_ ” wailed Rei, “did he see those terrible pictures of me?!”

“Of course! They were part of the training camp experience!” replied Kou matter-of-factly, removing her headset just as an indignant screech ripped through the ether, and putting it back on once Rei’s cry of anguish ebbed away.

“Besides, it’s not like Onii-chan cared about how you looked!” she continued as Rei buried his face in his arms. “He did take some of the ones I’ve printed, though.”

“Oooh, which ones?” asked Nagisa. Kou pressed a finger to her cheek.

“Um.. let’s see… he took some pictures of Haruka-senpai—”

“That’s Rin-chan for you!” giggled Nagisa.

“Some of the group shots with you and Rei-kun…”

“Aww, that’s sweet!”

“...and he also took some of Makoto-senpai.”

“ _Eeeh?_ ” cried Nagisa and Rei in chorus. Kou shrugged.

“He wanted the ones where I made Makoto-senpai show off his arms and back muscles. Onii-chan said it was… fitspiration.”

Nagisa’s laughter bubbled through the speakers for half a minute, dotted with breathless praise for the winner of Best Muscles, until he was interrupted by the distinct jingles of Kou’s cell phone thrumming on her writing desk.

“Oh, hold on,” Kou brushed off her headset, but just as she shoved the laptop onto the duvets so she could wiggle off the top bunk, Chigusa left her makeshift nail salon on the bottom bunk to retrieve her phone. Kou thanked her friend and plucked the phone from her hand, pressing _Answer_ blindly as she lifted it to her ear.

“Hello?” she slumped against the wall, her eyes roaming the ceiling, unaware that on screen, Rei had politely turned his head away, while Nagisa was staring at her inclined profile in growing curiosity.

 _“Kou?”_ came a voice she had never heard across the line, but recognized instantly.

“Haruka-senpai?!” she blurted. On screen, Nagisa gasped and Rei turned his head ever so slightly in their direction, his glasses flaring white.

 _“Do you still have our pictures from camp?”_ asked Haru. Kou hummed.

“Of course! Onii-chan took some of them, but if you just tell me which ones you want—”

 _“All of them_ ,” came the swift reply. _“And the new ones.”_

“New? Oh, the ones from the relay? I do have those! Onii-chan took most of my pictures from camp, but I’m going to order new ones soon!”

_“When can you bring them?”_

“Bring them? Um, I think I could get them done tomorrow morning…”

_“Bring them to my house tomorrow. Come at noon.”_

“To your house..?”

_“I’ll make you lunch. ..For your trouble.”_

Kou’s eyes widened, her lips curled into a small ‘o’. Silence stretched on, tainted only by the faint murmurs of Nagisa demanding she spoke louder so they could hear. The line fizzed.

_“Kou..?”_

“I’m here!” cried Kou, nearly dropping her phone in excitement. “At noon, then!”

 _“Thank you,”_ replied Haruka, then promptly hung up, leaving static in his wake. Kou pressed a hand to her hot cheek.

“What is it?! _Kou-chaaan..!_ ” Nagisa whined through her abandoned headset. Kou picked it up.

“I’m having lunch with Haruka-senpai tomorrow!” she squealed, closing her eyes in bliss as her audience of three joined together in a unanimous and envious “ _Luckyyy..!”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stay tuned for the conclusion!


	69. EPISODE 13: Open Heart Reveal! - Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The final episode is here! Originally intended to be a single chapter, I realized too late that it had become very long, despite the constant omission of detail, and that by splitting it in two, I could have a total of seventy chapters, which is such a round, pleasing number that I ultimately couldn't resist it. This split is for the best, I promise. Enjoy and stay tuned for the final chapter!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Darkness draped around the bed like a velvet canopy. Spurred by a sense of unease, Haruka squirmed in his covers, only to feel Makoto’s arm curl over his chest, pulling him close._

_“Just five more minutes,” Makoto’s drowsy murmur grazed his ear. Haru hummed._

“Five more minutes…” _Fine…_ _but then you have to go..._

**_Haru!_ **

Haruka’s eyes flew wide, then screwed shut as something hot and white flooded them, blinded by the first rays of the sun pouring through the open blinds. He dragged a hand down his face and sat up, yellow wisps swimming in and out of his blotched vision as a faint buzz hit his ears, his phone throwing a tantrum on the nightstand.

_The alarm… Makoto!_

Haru tossed his blanket aside and stumbled out of his room, having just enough presence of mind to stick his bare feet into a pair of flip-flops before he stormed outside and down the stone steps in nothing but his crinkled shirt and shorts. Dust screeched beneath his soles as he hit the path and scrambled to the wooden gate of the Tachibanas’ house, where he rang the bell once, twice, each press of the button longer than the last.

The house loomed eerily silent. Nothing stirred in the morning breeze beyond a handful of fresh daisies in the glass bottle. Haruka’s heart hammered in his ears as if counting the seconds, until a scraping sound scratched its way into his consciousness, only to disappear the moment he tried to place it.

“They’ve gone away, Haruka-chan,” he heard a feeble voice to his right. Haru tensed and turned his head, to find a little old lady idling nearby in a long-sleeved apron, a weathered broom cradled to her side.

“Tamura-obaachan,” blurted Haru, hardly knowing why her presence surprised him. For as long as he could remember, Tamura-san had been pacing up and down the path to his house with a broom in her hands or a linen bag hung from her arm, braving the weather every single day in search of errands and company.

“They won’t be back till Sunday night,” carried on the old lady, to whom every child on the hill had become as dear and familiar as her own, Haruka being no exception. In fact, if Haru had to guess, it must have been Tamura-san who had given Makoto those greasy newspaper parcels of fried squid at the start of the term. _How nice of her…_ “But what are you doing outside so early and looking like that, Haruka-chan? Were you looking for Makoto-chan, perhaps?”

Heat flared up Haruka’s throat and rushed straight to his ears, his hands subconsciously tugging at the hem of his shirt to straighten its crumpled folds. Mistaking his awkward silence, Tamura-san added,

“You _do_ know Makoto-chan?”

Haru’s eyes fell to the steps. He forced a hum.

“We go to high school together… He’s my best friend,” he mumbled, his chest growing tight as the terrible news of having missed his chance to see Makoto sank in. Tamura-san gawked at him, but then broke into a grin that pulled her wrinkled cheeks round and pink with joy.

“I’m so glad to hear it!” she lifted a hand to her chest, heaving a sigh of relief. “And here I worried so often your mother would never introduce you..! I’m so glad she did!”

“What do you mean?” Haru arched his brow. She blinked.

“Has she never told you? Ah, she might have been ashamed of it, and kept it to herself. Well, no shame in it now, since you’re best friends,” replied Tamura-san, cupping her chin as she traced the hard lines of her memories. “When the Tachibanas moved here, do you remember, Haruka-chan? Some nine years ago, I think you were eight. Yes, you’re a crab, aren’t you, so you had just turned eight in the summer. It was a week or so after they had moved here. One morning, I met Tachibana-san, just as she was going out on a walk with her children. The twins were so small, yet so fat already! As cute as a pair of dumplings in their double stroller! And there was Makoto-chan, only seven years old, going on eight. You are a crab, so you’re older, and Makoto-chan’s a scorpion, but he wasn’t much of a scorpion then. I’ve never seen a bigger scaredy cat in my life! He would hide behind his mother’s skirt the entire time we were talking about how they moved, and how she was, and where they had come from, that sort of thing. Tachibana-san told me, I remember I felt so sad! She told me Makoto-chan was very shy, and hadn’t left the house at all until that walk they were taking just then, and it had been over a week since they moved in, too! I thought it very odd. But then I remembered you, Haruka-chan, and what a little hermit crab you were, and then it wasn’t so odd anymore.”

Haruka frowned unnoticed. Her hand slackened on her broom.

“But then, a few days later, I think it was a few days, I met your mother too, coming home from work. _Nanase-san_ , I said to her, _Nanase-san, have you met your new neighbors? The Tachibanas, they just moved here with three children, a pair of twins and a son as big as your own! You should introduce yourself, take your son._ She said something about being busy, but that won’t do, that really won’t do with neighbors, neighbors should always be on good terms with one another. When I moved here, I was just a little girl, but I remember the housewarming gifts! Such a nice tradition. So I said to her, _Nanase-san, you should go over and give them a gift! A loaf of fresh bread or a lucky coin would be very nice. You don’t need to bother with rice, they already have so many children, but bread and a coin and some wine for the parents would be just the thing. You should go and take your son. Haruka-chan’s a shut-in, their son’s a shut-in, they could be little shut-ins together!_ ”

Haru pursed his lips in a glare. Tamura-san took one look at him and her face scrunched up, unable to smother her laughter.

“Ah, you’re a spitting image of your mother from then!” she giggled, wiping her eye with the back of her hand. “She looked as offended as you do now, for shame! And she told me, ah, how did she say it, she told me, _The last thing my son needs is **a shut-in to encourage him!**_ And then she stormed up the stone steps, just like that! Can you _imagine?_ ” she clamped a hand on Haru’s arm, squeezing affectionately.

He let her, too stunned to protest her teasing. A moment later, Tamura-san withdrew her hand and curled it to her lips to clear her throat.

By the time she spoke again, her tone rang somber as that former glow of cheerfulness fled from her face.

“For a long time, I was so worried she would be angry with me, and not introduce you because of what I said. I could feel my worry like a lump on my heart. I’m so glad she did it after all..!”

 _But she didn’t_ , thought Haruka, teeth gritted as a spark of anger flashed inside him.

“But now you missed your friend… They’re gone camping, Haruka-chan,” continued Tamura-san, having finally recalled Haru’s purpose in venturing outside. “They left this morning and asked me to take care of their plants, and the, the fish. Makoto-chan left me a long sheet of paper about feeding some fish.”

“Four goldfish,” breathed Haruka. “We bought them together.”

“Did you? How nice!” Tamura-san clapped her hands, her good humor returning. “You know, you’ve _changed,_ Haruka-chan. Makoto-chan, too. You’re fine, tall boys now, and not little shut-ins anymore! I was so worried for both of you. How shy you used to be..! But Makoto-chan grew up into such a nice young man. And now he is gone and I have to feed his fish, but how shall I manage it? So many plants and so many feedings..! I promised I would, since my grandchildren might not come this week, that I would take care of everything. I bet those fish are very important to Makoto-chan, since you bought them together.”

“I can help,” blurted Haruka, his fists clenched by his sides. “I can feed the fish. I can water the plants, too.”

“Ah, so you could, Haruka-chan!” mused Tamura-san, scratching her cheek with a finger. “Well, if you were more of a stranger, like some friend of his from school that I’ve never met before, I wouldn’t let you, not for the world, but I’ve known you for a long while. But will you really do it, Haruka-chan? I should be in trouble if anything died by the time they got back. It would break Makoto-chan’s heart, you know.”

“I will do it,” nodded Haru, his expression solemn. “I’m home all week.”

“Are you? Ah, of course, school is over for the summer, isn’t it? Time flies so fast. Well, if you insist, here are the keys, Haruka-chan,” she sank a hand into the front pocket of her apron, producing a ring of spares that she slipped onto Haru’s palm, her fingers daintily separating its color-marked keys. “Now, this one opens the gate, and this one…”

* * *

Armed with a set of keys and Makoto’s instructions, Haru hurried home for a change of proper clothes, then made his way back down the stone steps again, pausing by the single torii to take stock of the plants adorning the Tachibana house. Makoto’s balcony alone held several flower pots suspended from the railing. Haru drew a sharp breath. He would have no choice but to go through Makoto’s room to water them… to spend a little time in Makoto’s room every single day…

Cheeks flushed and his stomach full of butterflies, he briefly paid his respects to the goldfish grave outside, then entered the house at last, stopping by the aquarium in the entrance hall to peruse Makoto’s instructions. A smile tugged at Haru’s lips as he read a short introduction of the four fish, including their names and habits. He noted the suggested feeding times, which were indeed numerous, then shook his head fondly the request on the bottom, which was to the effect that the fish might be allowed to listen to the radio during the day instead of having to swim about in complete silence. A small portable radio rested by the aquarium, already plugged into a nearby socket. Haruka turned the knob on the front, not at all surprised to find the thing tuned to a classical music station that promised relaxing background noise for the goldfish, who at present swam about in lazy circles. According to the paper, Makoto had fed them before he left, so Haru promised them a second feeding in a few hours, then proceeded up the staircase to Makoto’s room, his smile fading.

As soon as he stepped inside, he pulled the door shut behind him, content to find the windows closed and his privacy guaranteed. Haru braced himself and pulled his phone out of his pocket, flipping it open to check his history. Two missed calls from his mother. He dialed her number and waited, features hardening as his phone clicked.

“Haruka..!” she yawned on the other end. “You’re up early today..!”

Haru snuck a peek at Makoto’s alarm clock by the bed, which had just ticked to 6:39.

“I saw you called,” he muttered as he moved past the bed and towards Makoto’s writing desk, brushing his fingers over the edge.

“Of course I did! It’s not every day that my son goes to a swimming tournament!” chirped his mother, now sufficiently alert and eager for good news. “So how was regionals? How did your relay go?”

Haruka’s brow clouded. He took a deep breath to steel himself.

“We won.. but we got disqualified,” he said at last, eyes flitting from the strangely immaculate desk top to Makoto’s cluttered bulletin board, where he discovered the calligraphic certificate from the cultural festival, and some new doodles from the twins.

“ _Disqualified?_ What happened?” cried his mother. Haru bit his lip.

“Makoto gave up his place so Rin could swim with us. And we got disqualified for it.”

“He **_what?!_** ”

Haru’s eyes bore holes in the patch of wall by the bulletin board, his ears ringing in the wake of her scream.

“He gave up his place so Rin could swim with—”

“Yes, yes, _I heard you!_ And he got you disqualified! Haruka, I thought you said this boy was trustworthy! That he was _sensible!_ ”

“He did it because _I made him!_ ” snapped Haru, his jaws set.

“You didn’t…” hissed his mother. The seconds ticked away. Her next breath turned sharp as nails on chalkboard. “I cannot believe you.. After all these years you finally get a chance to compete, and you threw it away! You know how important achievements are! How important your reputation is! How could you do this, Haruka?! **_What possessed you?!_** ”

“What about _you?_ ” Haru found himself saying, his tone cold and bitter as bile. Silence blared on the other end.

“What about me..?” mumbled his mother, confused. Haru gritted his teeth.

“You knew the Tachibanas lived here. You knew they had a son and you _never introduced me,_ ” he began, his voice swelling as he stepped to the window with a perfect view to his own room across the stone stairs. Just how often had Makoto been gazing out at that other house, wishing for the childhood friend that never came? “Tamura-obaachan told me! She told me she wanted you to take me, but you got upset at her and didn’t!”

“Haruka..!”

She sounded so surprised, so shocked Haru’s blood curdled.

“If you had introduced us, _we could have been friends!_ ” he carried on, his face scrunching up. “But you never said anything! You said you wanted me to have friends, but you didn’t even try! _You got angry at some old lady so you ignored them and **kept him from me!**_ ”

“Haruka, _I—_ ”

_End Call._

Haruka gasped for breath by the time he tossed his phone onto the desk, and after a few moments of shambling aimlessly about, he let himself collapse onto Makoto’s bed and rolled onto his side, his legs curled up by the edge like last time, except they now did so in vain.

The air froze around him. Haru closed his eyes.

_I’m cold, Makoto…_

* * *

How long Haruka lay there, he didn’t know. He didn’t dare check the clock. He didn’t dare move from the bed, but after what felt like an eternity, the phone came to life and rang out, thrumming in place on Makoto’s desk. Haru winced at the sound, but rose to his feet and shuffled over to pick it up. He held his breath, so quiet he could hear hers.

“...I remember now,” came his mother’s voice, distant and hollow. “It was around the time your father got his first job abroad. Do you remember..? We had to find an apartment for him, and then the car broke down, and there was just so much to do that I, I eventually forgot.. I didn’t even know which house they took in the neighborhood. I probably passed it at least twice every day, too… but, if I hadn’t been so busy, I would not have...”

A pause. He could hear her breath hitch.

“ _Haru-chan, I’m sorry…_ ”

Haru swallowed, his insides squirming at the thought of her eyes brimming with tears.

“Drop the -chan,” he whispered, unable to raise his voice. She sniffled.

“Haruka.. I’m really sorry.. I remember, being angry with Tamura-san, and for a little while, I thought about going over, but I dreaded, meeting them… and then your father’s job, and I just forgot, but you’re right. I shouldn’t have been angry. And, I should not, have given up, so easily. I should not have, given up, before you did. _I’m so sorry.._ ”

“Enough…” sighed Haruka, his throat strangled and eyes stinging. She took a deep breath.

“Listen, son,” she said next, her voice still trembling, but no longer so lifeless, “your father and I, we’ll come home next Saturday. Why don’t we invite them all for dinner? You could go over and invite him and his family for next Sunday, and when we come home, we’ll help you clean the house and cook for them. We’ll make them the best hot pot they ever had. What do you say..?”

Haru squinted, one hand clenching by his side.

“I.. don’t know if we can anymore.”

“Why not?”

Haru drew a sharp breath through his nose.

“Makoto.. we made Makoto give up his place so we could swim with Rin. After all his hard work, and everything we’ve been through, we still chose someone else over him. Makoto didn’t say anything, he wasn’t angry with any of us, but what if he… had enough of me..?”

“Haruka…” rasped his mother. Haru closed his eyes.

“What if he doesn’t want to be my friend anymore…”

“Why don’t you talk to him?” pleaded his mother. “Go talk to him, I’ll call you back.”

“I can’t. He went camping this morning.”

“And you didn’t get to talk?”

“He left earlier than I thought he would.”

“No wonder you’re up so early, then… When will he be back?”

“...On Sunday.”

“That’s.. That’s not so bad, actually,” mused his mother. Haru blinked. “If he’s gone away on holiday, he will probably get a good rest and enjoy himself, and by the time he comes back, he might feel well enough to talk. So just, invite him over the day after and talk to him.”

“I don’t know how,” said Haru, hoping she didn’t catch the quiver of his voice. She paused.

“Listen, Haruka, here’s what you need to do,” she began, oblivious of the way Haru’s eyes widened in something akin to hope. “First, you put the house in order…”

“Put it.. in order?” he echoed. She hummed again.

“Like a spring cleaning. Well, summer cleaning by now. You can even rearrange the living room if you like. Just give everything a good, thorough cleaning and do whatever you think will make the house more welcoming. Give the rooms a good airing, too. Then, you go and buy a lot of food just before he comes home, and invite him over sometime between breakfast and lunch the next day. Men are really simple, son, they will at least listen to you if there’s enough food.”

Haru made a face, glad she couldn’t see it.

“The point is, feed him and then talk to him. He should be softened by your hospitality, or at the very least he’s going to be polite to you because you gave him food, and if the two of you are good friends, everything will resolve. You do get along normally, don’t you?”

“Yeah…”

“You like each other’s company?”

Haru hummed, his cheeks too hot.

“Then I’m sure it will be fine. ..Oh, listen, son, I have to get ready for work. Call me later if you need some tips for rearranging the living room. Love you.”

“Okay… take care,” he managed to say before the phone clicked. Haruka lowered it with a shaky sigh. His heart still thrashed about in his chest, but in the wake of that much softened voice, that _Haru-chan_ he hadn’t heard since the first term of middle school, Haru could no longer rekindle his anger. All that remained was the conviction, however useless, that he and Makoto could have been childhood friends. To think they might have spent hours and hours in this very room, playing all those games Makoto liked so much… Haru could have drawn him cats for his bulletin board...

His gaze drifted to the board, but as if weary of the possibilities, it fell from one of those endearing Picasso cats to the weekly calendar on Makoto’s desk, the only personal object that remained in plain sight after he had swept everything into his drawers. Across all seven days of the week, Makoto had spelled out,

**C A M P I N G**

Beneath the word, a few smudges and eraser marks suggested an addition Makoto had blotted out, whether he had done so out of embarrassment or because the addition had become irrelevant.

Flushed at his own nerve, Haru tucked a finger behind the calendar and flipped to the previous page in search of clues. The phrase, _Nagisa’s birthday?_ stretched from Monday through Friday ( _Of course, we never did tell him which day it was_ ), while the weekend was marked for _Regionals_ … and in the corner of Sunday, in minuscule lettering,

_Ask Haru?_

His heart jolted. _Ask me what, Makoto?_

Haruka turned back to the current page, but he couldn’t make out the smudges at all. The way Makoto tended to grip his eraser in Art class, he had probably wiped the paper flat, too.

Haru clenched his jaw.

He took a deep breath and turned to the cabinet with its widescreen television, dozen consoles, and its mysterious drawers below, hoping for some answers from the latter. He walked over to the cabinet, shooting one more disappointed glance at the writing desk and the steel mesh waste basket by its side… where he spotted a long strip of paper leaning against the inside of the waste basket crisp and smooth, as if it had been handled with great care before it was gently discarded. Haru bit his lip.

Scolding himself for being so weak, yet unwilling to let the opportunity pass, he reached out and plucked the folded slip from the waste basket, his head whipping to the balcony as if spies might be lurking about, ready to catch him in the act. The slip felt oddly smooth and thick between his fingers. In fact, Haru could have sworn he had held a dozen others just like it over the years, usually at the start of the new year.

He took a deep breath and folded it out. As he suspected, it was a fortune - a future blessing.

_Your wish might come true with help from others._

_Your travels will make you wiser._

_Sacrifices will be necessary._

_Steer clear of arguments._

_You will be reunited with the person you want to see._

_You cannot force love. Be patient._

Haruka’s cheeks gradually paled, his fingers pinched around the bottom corner like a vise. _When did Makoto get this fortune?_ Didn’t he tell them he did not believe in these things, back when…

_Back when we visited the Misagozaki shrine, just before prefecturals._

His heart skipped a beat. So this was the fortune Makoto refused to show them, choosing to take it home while everyone else had theirs tied into knots at the shrine, to reinforce their good luck or keep their bad luck at bay…

_Why would you keep this, Makoto..?_

Haruka read the words over and over, ashamed of his own prying yet unable to relinquish the fortune his best friend had left behind. A mixed blessing if there ever was one… _poor Makoto._ Didn’t he know keeping it and then throwing it away like this was asking for even more bad luck? And yet it couldn’t have been sitting in the waste basket for long. Could Makoto have thrown it away last night, after all that had happened at regionals?

_Sacrifices will be necessary._

_Steer clear of arguments._

_You cannot force love. Be patient._

_Ask Haru?_

Haru pressed a hand to his face, his fingers like icicles against his burning cheeks.

He hesitated for a moment longer, then turned around, folding the fortune and pressing it to his chest. He grabbed his phone from the writing desk and hurried out of Makoto’s room, out of his house and up the stone stairs, only stopping by his own house on the way to the Misagozaki Shrine to grab his wallet.

In another minute, Haruka passed through the arch in search of the nearest fortune rack, where several dozen paper knots rustled in the wind, fastened to wires suspended across the wooden framework. Haru glanced around, sighing in relief when he realized he was alone, with no one to witness his last-minute attempt to salvage his best friend’s fortune.

Haru read it one more time to memorize the words, then slowly, ever so carefully, he tied Makoto’s fortune into a knot over one of the wires. Normally, that might have been enough, but just to be safe, Haru dug into his wallet and pulled out a fistful of change for the altar. He then rang the bell and pressed his hands together, to end his visit with a prayer to every god of fortune there ever was.

 _There._ Though Makoto had already suffered the worst of his mixed blessing, the rest might still come true… though when Haru thought of the wording, the matter seemed entirely out of Makoto’s hands.

_Your wish might come true with help from others._

_You will be reunited with the person you want to see._

_You cannot force love. Be patient._

Out of Makoto’s… but not _his._

Haru pursed his lips and bowed deeply by the altar in a silent promise, then left the shrine in a jog for his house. Between summer cleaning, home improvement projects, and a menu to devise within a week’s time, Haruka now had much to do until Makoto’s return.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Later that week, Kou came over to bring all the pictures she had printed out at Haru’s request, to find that she had become a taste tester for a dish Haru had been experimenting with. Kou could not help but roll her eyes at Haruka-senpai’s willfulness, but forgave him when she found the food delicious, and her comments and suggestions appreciated.


	70. EPISODE 13: Open Heart Reveal! - Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The final chapter at last. Enjoy the conclusion!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fortunately for Makoto, Haruka’s mother proved prophetic. Though his last night at home promised nothing but disaster for the next seven days, Makoto had every intention of ignoring his pain during vacation in the hopes that time might lessen its sting, and after a final conversation with his wife, Makoto’s father had become just as willing to do so for his son’s sake. The moment he met Makoto in the hallway on the brink of dawn, he hurried over and gave his son the hug he had failed to bestow the night before, along with the solemn promise of not discussing the matter any further during their holiday. Having dreaded the revival of the subject for the better part of the night, Makoto’s spirits improved considerably at this news, and between his parents’ love of hiking and badminton, and his siblings’ enthusiasm for swimming, Makoto simply had no time to dwell on past injuries and insecurities. Indeed, teaching Ran and Ren all he had learned at the swim club allowed Makoto to make further progress in his relationship with the water, and by the time they had to say goodbye to the health resort, Makoto could not help but think he would have liked to stay a little longer…

In this manner, he had spent his week most agreeably, in a circle where everyone doted on him as much as possible, and come Sunday evening, Makoto carried his share of the camping equipment uphill with no worse feelings than slight jitters at the thought of his four goldfish waiting in the aquarium, hopefully no worse for wear… until he reached the gate, and noticed a piece of paper sticking out of their mailbox.

He lowered his cargo onto the steps and plucked it loose. His father stopped behind him, his luggage still hoisted over his shoulder.

“What is it, Makoto?”

“This was in the mailbox,” replied his son, who paused to wait when his father reached into his pocket for his phone, turning on its flashlight. He directed it at Makoto’s hands, who unfolded the now illuminated paper, his mother and the twins fast approaching to see why the others had blocked their way into the front yard.

Makoto’s breath hitched. He expected a note from Tamura-san, to the effect that she had done as they asked and returned their spare keys, but instead the paper read, in neat handwriting he recognized instantly,

_Makoto,_

_Come over on Monday at nine in the morning._

_Please._

_Haru_

His father let out an exasperated huff, but Makoto careened his head towards his friend’s house at once, instinctively searching the windows of Haruka’s bedroom. He imagined he saw something move in one of the corners and twitched, then scolded himself for being such a scaredy cat, unaware that Ran had reached out and nicked the note from his hands, holding it out to her mother and brother.

“A note from Haru-chan!” Ren stated the obvious, the twins exchanging curious glances. Their mother turned to her eldest with her brow creased.

“Makoto?” came her voice, warm with concern. Makoto twitched and turned back to them, his face flushed in the light of his father’s phone.

“I guess I’ll go over to Haru’s tomorrow,” he mumbled, scratching his cheek with a finger. “He even wrote _Please._ ”

His father scoffed, but upon receiving a gentle nudge from his wife, he sighed and only said,

“Well, if you must go, Makoto, promise me you’ll insist on an apology. You deserve an apology.”

“Dad…” breathed Makoto. His father fished out his keys and unlocked the gate.

“Come on, everyone,” he said, his voice sufficiently even, “the fish and our beds are waiting.”

The twins gasped and scurried after their father with their mother in tow, anxious to see the goldfish, but Makoto lingered for a moment longer, his eyes flitting to the windows again. _Surely Haru’s gone to bed by now,_ he told himself, yet spurred by a surge of hope, Makoto made a show of folding the note and tucking it into his shirt pocket, then pulled out his phone to compose a reply.

_To: Haru_

_I got your message. See you tomorrow at nine._

_Good night, Haru. ‒Makoto_

He then picked up his luggage again and walked through the gate, heading over to the goldfish grave first.

“I’m home,” he whispered as he stopped in front of it, then blinked, his eyes widening in surprise. To his amazement and infinite gratitude, his former goldfish had not been forgotten in his absence. The glass bottle gleamed as if it had been recently cleaned, and held not wild flowers or samples cut from their own plants, but a single white rose, its stem trimmed short not to risk toppling the bottle over. A few meters away, Makoto’s mother poked her head out to locate her missing child, and when she found him standing by the goldfish grave in reverie, she joined his side and inclined her head, breaking into a smile at the rare display.

“How kind of Tamura-san to honor your goldfish like this… We must thank her when we see her tomorrow.”

Makoto hummed, his face scrunched up, then followed his mother inside, the door closing behind them for good.

Huddled by the lower right corner of his window, Haru let out a sigh, his complexion reddish green in the pale glow of his phone. He set an alarm for the morning, then snuck into his bed, having stayed up only to see Makoto and his family return in safety.

Opposite him at the Tachibana house, Makoto entered his bedroom at last, having checked on his four goldfish swimming about to classical music on the radio, and said good night to his family soon afterwards. He exchanged his clothes for a shirt and shorts, then burrowed under the covers, where his final thought was that his bed hadn’t felt so soft, or smelled so good in a while.

* * *

The next day, a few minutes from nine o’clock, Makoto stepped out of his house freshly showered, neatly dressed, and some of his best cologne applied, his features tense in anticipation. He only made it as far as the gate, however, for as soon as he opened it, he saw Tamura-san walking towards their house with her trusty linen bag hung from her arm, from whence she used to produce grilled squid wrapped in newspaper to hand to him on his way to school.

“Tamura-obaachan..!” Makoto greeted her with a bow, scooting backwards when she took to the steps, making her way into their front yard.

“Makoto-chan, welcome back,” she grinned, reaching out a hand to cup Makoto’s cheek. “You have tanned and got freckles now,” she noted with a giggle, but when Makoto turned his eyes with a self-conscious frown, she kindly added, “Don’t you worry, Makoto-chan, you look very nice, freckles or not. And you smell so good! Are you going somewhere, perhaps?”

“I got a note from Haru, I mean, Nanase-kun, to come over to his house,” explained Makoto, his cheeks blooming. She squinted at him in amusement.

“Well, then,” she said with another grin, “since you are going over, would you be so good as to thank Haruka-chan for me?”

“Thank.. Haru..?” blurted Makoto, eyes large. She nodded.

“I know your mother asked _me_ to water all the plants and feed your fish, Makoto-chan, but it was really Haruka-chan who did it,” she whispered to him as if imparting some great secret, her hand flitting to Makoto’s arm. “If he had been a stranger to me, I would not have let him, not for the world, but he said you were his best friend, so I didn’t have the heart to say no. It was Haruka-chan who watered all the plants and fed your fish, Makoto-chan. I only checked in every evening to turn off the radio, except on Sunday. I thought you might like to come home to some music, to be assured your wish was granted.”

“Haru… _Haru did everything..?_ ” echoed Makoto, comically shocked at this turn of events. Her fingers circled his bicep.

“Well, what are best friends for?” she teased, then gave him a tight squeeze. “Now go on, Makoto-chan, and thank him for me. I’ll say hello to your parents and return their keys.”

“Ah… I’ll, see you later then,” mumbled Makoto as she shuffled past him towards the front door, stopping only to admire the flower in the glass bottle.

“White rose, huh,” she mused out loud, shaking her head. “Who would have thought…”

She then knocked on the door and Makoto passed through the gate, his spirits soaring with every step up the stone stairs, where he at last spotted the Nanase house and Haruka himself, waiting in the open doorway in a dress shirt and trousers – a little too formal between friends, perhaps, but all the more becoming on Haru’s slender frame. Makoto could scarcely breathe in excitement as he lifted and awkward hand to wave and Haru’s twitched up in reply, growing scarlet at the thought that Makoto’s tan and freckles returned, and how he seemed larger than Haru had last seen him. Was that even possible, or was it simply a week’s absence that made Makoto’s features so tall and handsome after his hunched shoulders and forlorn smiles at regionals?

“Haru..!” Makoto called out as he advanced and Haruka stepped outside, his hands hanging by his thighs. “Have you been waiting long..?”

“No, I just got here,” said Haru, his eyes averted for fear Makoto might laugh at him, but his gaze could not stay away long, as the freckles strewn across the bridge of Makoto’s nose proved too enticing to ignore. Makoto blushed when he noticed.

“I got sunburned…” he whined, his hand slipping upward to cover his face.

“It’s fine. You’re fine,” mumbled Haruka, turning his head away just as Makoto dropped his hand to stare at him. “...You should come inside,” Haru nodded to the doorway next, one hand motioning towards the living room.

“Ah, thank you, Haru,” said Makoto, flashing his friend a grateful smile as he stepped into the house… then stopped in the middle of the entrance hall, gawking around in shock. As far as the eye could see, every wooden surface, from the shoe cabinet to the hardwood floors, the railing, and the staircase gleamed as if freshly polished. Even the walls appeared a brighter shade of cream than Makoto remembered, and when he donned a pair of guest slippers he could only guess was recently bought, then entered the living room at last, his astonishment grew greater still. The vases and receptacles that used to clutter the shelves had eloped, to give way to a brilliant collection of gold medals and trophies. The terrace doors, which had always been closed even in good weather, had been pulled apart to pour sunshine and fragrant air into the room, while one closet door by the floor had been left open to reveal a set of purple pillows, two of which had been fluffed and placed around the table, opposite one another. The table itself, usually bare, now held some condiments, and a tray laden with glasses and a jug of iced barley tea, a bottle of mineral water, and a carton of orange juice.

Behind Makoto, Haru cleared his throat.

“Will you sit down?” came his voice, low as a whisper. Makoto forced a hum.

“Of course, thank you, Haru,” he mumbled as he stepped forward, but as soon as he lowered himself by the side where he would have faced the room and the hallway beyond it, he felt a hand grab his arm to detain him.

“Take the other one,” stammered Haruka. “That one’s better.”

Makoto’s ears burned as he hummed and moved over to his designated pillow on the other side, from whence he had a splendid vista of the sunlit terrace – his mother would have called it the ‘guest view.’ He could hear a relieved sigh as Haru turned around and walked off to the kitchen. Makoto shook his head affectionately and looked away, engrossed once more in the marvelous transformation of this once austere house. Scattered among Haruka’s trophies, he noticed several photographs in wooden frames, though they were too small and far away from him to discern the subject matter with any certainty. Makoto now regretted not bringing his glasses, but another set of pictures soon seized his attention, for the generic landscapes that once hung from the walls had been replaced by watercolor paintings of beaches and water that appeared vaguely familiar to Makoto. The same luster that greeted him in the hallway had also spread to the furniture within… but just as Makoto mustered the courage to remark on these improvements, Haruka returned from the kitchen with a tray bearing strawberries, cherries, a couple of peaches, and several slices of watermelon. He set down his offering on Makoto’s side of the table, whirling around again before Makoto could utter a thank you, and within seconds, the fruit were followed by a small woven basket of assorted breakfast pastries, and finally, a platter holding a variety of fun-sized candy bars. The latter, along with a clean plate for easy pickings, wound up right in front of Makoto, while Haru perched himself onto the other pillow with nothing but a glass of water in front of him, his cheeks rosy and brows arched anxiously as his eyes locked into Makoto’s.

“You can have whatever you want,” he said quietly, nodding to the spread that now covered Makoto’s end of the table. “You like these, right?”

“I do.. Thank you, Haru,” stammered Makoto, hoping Haruka wasn’t put out by his parroting the same phrase since he had stepped inside. He picked up one of the glasses and lifted the jug of barley tea, tilting it slightly towards Haruka as if offering to pour him a glass. After a moment’s pause, Haru gave him the smallest nod. Makoto flipped over another glass, and after filling both, he reached across the table to hand Haru his. Their fingers touched as Haru took the glass from him. Both averted their eyes, one struggling to still himself, and the other, not to lose his courage.

“Thank you,” whispered Haru.

Makoto hummed, then took a long sip of the barley tea to cool his boiling neck. Haru watched him like a hawk, his fingers hooked together beneath the table. He decided to give Makoto an entire minute to pick his snacks of choice, but when his friend took nothing beyond a refill of barley tea, and seemed entirely too anxious to eat at present, Haru braced himself to speak.

“Makoto..”

“Yes, Haru..?”

Those large green eyes fixed on him as if to invite. Haru bit his lip.

“I’m… I’m sorry.”

Though his father would have been pleased with the idea of Haru making amends, Makoto’s features clouded instead, his glass clinking against the wood as he set it down to devote his full attention to Haruka. The latter swallowed hard. One look at Makoto’s face and the apology he had been crafting in his mind for the better part of last week toppled over like a compromised tower of dominoes, yet Haru forced himself to look the other in the eye, his hands clenched in his lap.

“We… we were wrong, Makoto. Despite everything you’ve done, we took you for granted, and made you give up your place so we could swim with Rin instead,” he began, his face scrunching up as Makoto’s brow furrowed in apprehension. “We shouldn’t have let you do this just because of me. We should have swum together like we promised, but we let you down… I’m sorry.”

Haru bit his lips and waited for the other to speak, his throat as tight as wires and his eyes dropping to the table when he could no longer bear to see Makoto look not angry, not upset, but disappointed. The other drew a long breath through his nose. Haru gritted his teeth.

“Before I say anything,” spoke Makoto, searching his friend’s pale face, “I need you to tell me something.”

Haruka tensed, but nodded. Makoto closed his eyes.

“How are things between you and Rin _now_ , Haru? Did swimming together help you become friends again, or is everything just as bad as it was before?”

Haru jerked his head up to stare at Makoto, some color returning to his face.

“We’re friends now,” he reassured the other, the urge to explain, to _communicate_ welling up in his chest as it hardly ever had before. “And it’s all thanks to you. Swimming together again was something all of us needed, more than we knew. It was like that first relay, but somehow better, because of everything we’ve been through together. And when we had dinner, Rin told us he was grateful to you, and he would do his best to give you a great relay next year.”

“Give me.. a great relay?” Makoto quirked his brow. Haru nodded, trying for a smile.

“He was forgiven at Samezuka, and told us he would join the relay team again, fair and square. He said he’s looking forward to racing you next year.”

“Aaah…” sighed Makoto, his shoulders slackening in relief. “That’s great, Haru. When you apologized, I got worried things didn’t work out in the end, and giving up my place had been for nothing. But things worked out after all… I’m glad.”

Not knowing what else to say, Makoto fell silent. Haru pursed his lips.

“But are you really..?” he said next, eyes seeking Makoto’s again. “I know now that you were telling the truth back then, about having to go home because you were going camping, but you _were_ upset with us, weren’t you?”

Makoto hesitated, clearly caught off guard. Haru’s features tensed and he opened his mouth as if to argue, but before he could so much as utter a syllable, Makoto sighed and said, his tone warm and teasing,

“I know, Haru, I know. _No more secrets_ , right?”

Haru colored, but after a moment’s struggle for composure, he nodded. Makoto’s face softened, somewhat reminiscent of that poolside smile Haru had come to know so well, but those mellow eyes and upturned eyebrows spoke of no pangs this time.

“I don’t know if there’s any point in talking about this now, but if you want to know my feelings from then, I’ll be honest with you,” said Makoto, his tone low and calm. “I _was_ upset. I’m sure everyone could tell. After all of us had worked so hard, after everything we’ve been through, and what we had promised each other, all I wanted was to swim with you, Haru – to swim that relay with everyone. And then I ended up on the balcony, and watched all of you swim without me. It was really painful. Even _scary._ All of you performed so wonderfully, and when you won, you, _everyone_ seemed so happy… and I, I was envious of Rin. I would have given anything at that moment, to know what it was like, sharing that bond you shared with him.”

Haru gradually paled as his best friend spoke his mind, his brow creased pitifully even as Makoto’s smile widened and he added with a slight tilt of his head,

“But it’s alright. I don’t regret anything I’ve done, because I just—”

“You’re _not_ filler!” interrupted Haruka, his eyes large and glassy. Makoto blinked, but a moment later, he lifted a fist to smother a cough that sounded suspiciously like laughter. Haru turned his head, his chest rising and falling a little too fast under his dress shirt.

“I was going to say, _because I just wanted to help you_ , which is different, I promise,” explained Makoto, waiting for Haru to look at him again. “You have been through so much, Haru. You’ve been suffering alone for so long, and needed this break so badly. Rin, too, _I know_ , but… I believe, this whole time, I only thought of you.”

Haru’s breath hitched. Makoto dropped his gaze, but only for a moment.

“I promised myself a long time ago I would help you in any way I could, Haru. And now that you are free, if you really _are_ happy, and everyone can move forward, then I don’t regret a thing..!”

He paused in wait of a response, but when all he could discern was some lingering doubt on Haru’s face, some invisible weight dragging down his shoulders, Makoto sighed and added,

“But I see these aren’t the words you need to hear.”

Haru stared at him, eyes large. Makoto smiled.

“Haru, if you were worried I was angry, that I might still be angry or upset at you or anyone else, I swear I’m not, and I forgave you and the others long ago. You didn’t need to apologize to me, but since you have, I accept your apology, and it means a lot to me. So please don’t worry about this anymore. I’m happy things worked out in the end. It was worth giving up my place if it means you will be happy.”

“I _am_ happy,” Haru assured him at once, though his anxious expression conveyed it very ill. “But are _you_ happy? After all we did, will you stay and swim with us?”

“I promised, didn’t I..?” chided Makoto, his eyes flitting to the table before returning to Haruka. “I will swim, if you want me to.”

“But do _you_ want it?” blurted Haru, his hands wringing the edge of the table. Makoto paused, though Haru could see no hesitation beyond some awkwardness he couldn’t place.

“I do want to stay, and swim with you,” said Makoto at last, forcing himself to look Haru in the eye again, putting on a smile as warm as he could muster. “Despite everything, I like swimming, I really do, Haru, so don’t worry anymore.”

Haru’s mouth opened, but his heart fluttered to his throat and the words never came. Makoto shook his head, an amused grin stretched across his face.

“Did you really do all of this just to apologize to me..?” he nodded at the richly laden table in front of him, eyes twinkling. Haru flushed.

“Yes… and no,” he said, his shoulders tense. “There is something else.”

“Oh? What is it, Haru?”

Haruka steeled himself. _Come on… how hard could this be?_

“Come with me,” he told his friend, rising from his seat with his hand reached out. Makoto took it and stood, glad no one could see his face as an equally flustered Haruka dragged him onto the terrace and from there to a thin cement path leading to the back of the house, towards the same flight of stairs Makoto had once climbed with the others when their worst fears hung in the air, with no Haruka to disperse them. His friend pulled him up the staircase and in front of the door Nagisa wanted Makoto to break down that evening, pointing at the top of its thick, weather-beaten doorframe.

“Do you see that splinter?” he asked Makoto, drawing a finger along a large, thick spike still clinging to the wood by its base. Makoto hummed, then watched in growing amazement as Haru tucked a fingernail behind the splinter and pulled it away, revealing a small compartment with a key inside. Haru coaxed it out with his nails, then brushed the splinter back in place.

“When I was younger, I used this door to go outside all the time, but after a while, we locked it, so nobody has used it in a while. But now we can, with this spare key.”

Makoto hummed again, obviously stunned, but too curious to protest. Haru pushed the key into the lock and turned it, pulling the door open. After being out of use, Makoto expected it to get stuck on its hinges, but like everything else downstairs, the door had been cleaned and its hinges recently oiled when Haruka first tested the newly made spare key. Haru stepped inside.

“If you ever ring the bell and I don’t answer, you can use the spare key to come through this door,” he explained to Makoto as his friend followed him back into the house, closing the door behind himself. “We are now upstairs, where the bedrooms are, but if I don’t answer, then I’m probably in the bathroom downstairs,” Haru carried on as he descended to the ground floor with Makoto in tow.

Haru waited for him to leave the staircase, then turned to Makoto with his fists clenched.

“There. Now you know how to get in if I don’t answer, so you can come over whenever you want,” he said, his brow furrowed. “Will you come?”

Makoto’s eyes widened.

“Haru, I—”

“ _Will you come?_ ” cried Haru, his fists trembling. Makoto stared at him bewildered, but soon broke into a tender smile at the way his friend’s eyes widened in wait.

“Haru…” he spoke again as he stepped forward, reaching out his hands to cup Haru’s fists. He gave them a squeeze and felt them relax in his hold, his heart humming at the way Haru’s cheeks suffused with color. “If you want me to, I’ll come by every day.”

Haru drew a shaky breath. Their eyes met again. Makoto swallowed.

“Well, was that everything?” he asked, trying for a grin. “Because if it was—”

“ _No._ There’s still one more thing,” Haru interrupted him, his shoulders tense.

“What is it?” asked Makoto, his confusion returning at his friend’s grave expression. Haru drew a deep breath from his nose, then tugged at Makoto’s hands, but as the other did not lean over to follow them, Haru screwed his eyes shut and nudged forward on tiptoes, wondering how Tachibana Makoto, Scorpio, age sixteen and a half had the audacity to grow so inconveniently tall as his lips touched the corner of Makoto’s lips, internally marveling at how soft they felt.

He drew back a moment later, his heart throbbing as he squinted at the other, whose eyes grew large and his cheeks the finest shade of crimson.

“...H-How about this? Is this okay?” Haru forced himself to say. Makoto gasped.

“ _Haru..!_ ” he yelped as soon as he found his voice, his hands squirming in the other’s grasp. “You _kissed_ me! Does this mean— _do you really…?_ ”

Haruka nodded fervently, his heart doing somersaults as Makoto burst into relieved laughter, which bubbled on his lips even as they met Haruka’s with fond urgency, leaving him speechless for several seconds. Makoto only broke the kiss to catch his breath, then pressed a few more pecks to Haruka’s jaw, whose hands tightened over his.

“Makoto too?!” Haru blurted at last, drinking in the glow of Makoto’s face as his best friend nodded just as intensely as Haruka had, hands fumbling with his as if struggling to contain them in his joy.

“But, how..? Since _when?_ ” urged Makoto, eyes glimmering in the light. Haruka averted his gaze.

“It happened so gradually, I don’t really know,” he owned, but with a soft shrug, he added, “But.. I think I first realized it, towards the end of training camp.”

“Training camp, huh…” whispered Makoto, his lips stretched into an awkward grin. “Was it the way I swam a terrible backstroke in the ocean, or the way I got everyone in trouble?”

“..Now that you mention it, you’re too troublesome for me,” replied Haru without missing a beat, his face deadpan. “I take it all back.”

“ _Haru..!!_ ” cried Makoto in exasperation, but his hands were promptly squeezed and his attention drawn to a smile lurking on Haru’s lips, so sweet Makoto leaned forward to taste it. His looks softened a great deal in the process. Haru took a deep breath, resisting the urge to return the gesture for a little longer.

“…What about Makoto?” he asked, eyeing the other with mounting impatience. Makoto glanced away, teeth clamped on his bottom lip.

“You’ll probably laugh at me…”

“Makoto…”

“I mean, I was the same way as you for a while—”

“ _Makoto._ ”

“Fine, fine,” laughed Makoto, too eager to see the other’s reaction to look away despite his embarrassment. “I first realized how I felt… when you came in sick that one Wednesday.”

Haruka’s eyes grew large. Makoto blushed, his shoulders hunched in discomfort.

“It was really strange at first, to sit in class without you, but Monday and Tuesday passed away just fine,” he explained, his eyes falling to the floor. “Nobody teased me, and I even talked to some of the girls, but it was still a little lonely. And then you finally came back on Wednesday, despite being sick, and when I saw you standing there in the door, even though you looked really pale and your hair was a mess… I thought my heart was gonna burst.”

Haru pursed his lips, his brow furrowed into an angry V.

“So you knew as early as April, and you never told me... _Makoto._ Didn’t I tell you, _no more secrets?_ ”

Makoto laughed despite himself.

“Haru..! It wasn’t that easy..!”

The other stared back incredulous. Makoto flashed him a tender look, rubbing circles over Haru’s hands with his thumbs.

“I knew from the beginning that you were special, Haru,” he began, eyes searching his friend’s as he drew Haru’s hands to his waist. “I’ve never met anyone like you before. You were everything I’m not, and yet I felt we were kind of similar, because we were both lonely, and needed someone who cared about us. We eventually became friends, or at least you didn’t mind me so much anymore, and after a while, it was weird to me how nobody else could see all the great things I saw in you, or took the time to get to know you better. So when I realized how I felt, I told myself you would need someone who not only loved everything about you, but could follow you anywhere. And to do that.. I first had to learn to love water.”

Haru’s lips parted in awe, eyes large and gleaming. Makoto dropped his gaze.

“I _was_ going to confess to you after the relay. I even thought of asking you to come camping with me and my family. But things didn’t turn out the way I expected…”

Haruka’s breath hitched as realization struck him. _Ask Haru?_ scribbled into the corner, the eraser smudges… _Could it be..?_

“Why didn’t you say anything..?” pleaded Haruka, his hands tightening on Makoto’s. His friend lowered his head with a guilty frown.

“I was too scared,” he whispered, his forehead nudged against Haru’s. “And.. I felt it wasn’t the right time to do it anymore. I had just given up my place for Rin, and everyone knew how hard that was for me. I knew you could see it, Haru. I could tell from your face. I just… didn’t want to pressure you with my feelings right then. I couldn’t bear to act pitiful, and make it seem like I wanted something for doing what anyone else would have done in my place. I said I’d wait forever if I had to, and I meant it. Because it was Haru, I felt I could wait a little longer, so I could tell you at the right time.”

Haru pulled back to look him in the eye, his chest still tight.

“If I hadn’t confessed to you, would you have just waited?”

Makoto bit his lip, but it was to suppress laughter.

“I met Tamura-obaachan this morning, and when she told me you watered all our plants and fed the goldfish every day, I promised myself I would tell you today, no matter what. I did try just now, you know, but you interrupted me and beat me to it.”

Haru huffed. Makoto’s grin widened.

“I’m so glad you beat me to it,” he whispered, pulling Haru close. “I thought nobody would ever fall in love with me.”

“Dummy…” breathed Haruka, and unable to tell Makoto how ridiculous he was, how ridiculously wonderful he was, Haru dropped his head on Makoto’s shoulder and wound his arms around him in an ever-tightening embrace, his hands sinking into the folds of Makoto’s shirt. A moment later, a large, warm hand pressed to his shoulder blades while another cupped the back of his head, caressing his hair with tender clumsiness. Haru closed his eyes. Makoto’s touch was too hot and his palms were slick with sweat, but lost in the tangle of his arms, Haru wished the moment would never end.

They stood motionless for a while. Nothing stirred except Makoto’s fingers combing through his hair, until Makoto pulled back just enough to slip a hand to his friend’s cheek. Haru’s heart skipped a beat, his hands rubbing up and down Makoto’s sides.

“Will you stay with me?” he mumbled when their eyes met. “I’ll make lunch…”

“Will it be mackerel?” teased Makoto. Haru turned his head with a pout and shut his eyes.

“Haru..”

“Mackerel _green curry_ ,” Haruka said in a sullen tone, one eye unscrewed just barely to shoot a glance at Makoto, who stared at him baffled.

“ _Mackerel.. green curry..?_ ” he whispered as if unable to believe his ears. Haru pursed his lips. Makoto laughed.

“ _Haru.._ I’d love to,” he said as he leaned over to kiss Haru’s cheek, just below one of those gorgeous dark blue eyes he had come to admire so much. Haru huffed, but his cheeks flared red and he could no longer hide his smile.

“Well, come on then,” he groused as he grabbed Makoto’s hand to pull him into the living room, to make up for lost time from the day the Tachibanas moved into the neighborhood, to the day when Haru met Makoto.

**_THE END…_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After several helpings of Kou-tested and approved mackerel green curry, Haru agreed to go over to the Tachibana house in the evening, where he bowed deeply to Makoto’s parents as he invited their whole family to have dinner on Sunday with Haruka’s parents, who were anxious to meet their neighbors and introduce themselves at last.  
> Makoto’s father forgave him and accepted the invitation. After all, Makoto looked so happy…
> 
>  


End file.
